<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?>
<!DOCTYPE ThML PUBLIC 
    "-//CCEL/DTD Theological Markup Language//EN"
    "http://www.ccel.org/dtd/ThML10.dtd">
<!--
<?xml-stylesheet type="text/xml"
    href="http://www.ccel.org/ss/thml.html.xsl" ?>
<?xml-stylesheet type="text/xsl"
    href="http://www.ccel.org/ss/thml.html.xsl" ?>
-->
    
<!-- Copyright Christian Classics Ethereal Library -->
<ThML> 
  <ThML.head> 

	 <generalInfo>
		<description><i>The Brothers Karamazov</i> is 
considered a supreme achievement in literature. Published 
near the end of the 19th century, it is one of the great 
works of world-renowned author Fyodor Dostoyevsky. <i>The 
Brothers Karamazov</i> tackles some of the most existential 
and important themes known to humankind--the existence of 
God, morality, free will, reason, doubt, and faith--just 
to name a few. Readers around the globe have found their 
lives transformed by this layered and complex book. A 
deeply spiritual work, <i>The Brothers Karamazov</i> is a work 
that every person should read.<br /><br />Tim 
Perrine<br />CCEL Staff Writer</description>
		<firstPublished />
		<pubHistory />
		<comments /></generalInfo> 

	 <printSourceInfo>
		<published /> 
	 </printSourceInfo> 

	 <electronicEdInfo>
		<publisherID>ccel</publisherID>
		<authorID>dostoevsky</authorID>
		<bookID>brothers</bookID>
		<workID>brothers</workID>
		<bkgID>brothers_karamazov_(dostoevsky)</bkgID>
		<version>1.0</version>
		<series /><editorialComments />
		<revisionHistory />
		<status />

		<DC>
		  <DC.Title>The Brothers Karamazov</DC.Title>
		  <DC.Creator sub="Author" scheme="ccel">dostoevsky</DC.Creator>
		  <DC.Creator sub="Author" scheme="file-as">Dostoevsky, Fyodor (1821-1881)</DC.Creator>
		  <DC.Creator sub="Author" scheme="short-form">Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky</DC.Creator>
		  <DC.Subject scheme="ccel">All;</DC.Subject>
		  <DC.Subject scheme="LCCN" />
		  <DC.Description />
		  <DC.Publisher>Christian Classics Ethereal Library, Grand Rapids, MI</DC.Publisher>
		  <DC.Date sub="Created" scheme="ISO8601">06-02-09</DC.Date>
		  <DC.Contributor sub="Markup">Andrew Hanson</DC.Contributor>
		  <DC.Source sub="ElectronicEdition" />
		  <DC.Source sub="ElectronicEdition" scheme="URL" />
		  <DC.Language scheme="ISO639-3">eng</DC.Language>
		  <DC.Rights>Public Domain</DC.Rights>
		  <DC.Type>Text.Monograph</DC.Type>
		  <DC.Identifier scheme="URL">/ccel/dostoevsky/brothers.html</DC.Identifier>
		  <DC.Format scheme="IMT">text/xml</DC.Format> 
		</DC>
	 </electronicEdInfo>
	 
 
	 
		
<style type="text/css">
.center	{ text-indent:0in; text-align:center }
</style>

<style type="text/xcss">
<selector class="center">
  <property name="text-indent" value="0in" />
  <property name="text-align" value="center" />
</selector>
</style>

			
			</ThML.head> 
  <ThML.body>

<div1 title="The Brothers Karamazov" prev="toc" next="i_1" id="i">

<div2 title="PART I" prev="i" next="i_2" id="i_1">

<div3 title="Book I - The History of a Family" prev="i_1" next="i_3" id="i_2">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - Fyodor Pavlovitch Karamazov" prev="i_2" next="ii" id="i_3">
						<p id="i_3-p1">ALEXEY Fyodorovitch Karamazov was the third son of Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch Karamazov, a landowner well known in our district in his
						
						own day, and still remembered among us owing to his gloomy and
						
						tragic death, which happened thirteen years ago, and which I shall
						
						describe in its proper place. For the present I will only say that
						
						this "landowner"- for so we used to call him, although he hardly spent
						
						a day of his life on his own estate- was a strange type, yet one
						
						pretty frequently to be met with, a type abject and vicious and at the
						
						same time senseless. But he was one of those senseless persons who are
						
						very well capable of looking after their worldly affairs, and,
						
						apparently, after nothing else. Fyodor Pavlovitch, for instance, began
						
						with next to nothing; his estate was of the smallest; he ran to dine
						
						at other men's tables, and fastened on them as a toady, yet at his
						
						death it appeared that he had a hundred thousand roubles in hard cash.
						
						At the same time, he was all his life one of the most senseless,
						
						fantastical fellows in the whole district. I repeat, it was not
						
						stupidity- the majority of these fantastical fellows are shrewd and
						
						intelligent enough- but just senselessness, and a peculiar national
						
						form of it.
						
							</p><p id="i_3-p2">He was married twice, and had three sons, the eldest, Dmitri, by
						
						his first wife, and two, Ivan and Alexey, by his second. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's first wife, Adelaida Ivanovna, belonged to a fairly
						
						rich and distinguished noble family, also landowners in our
						
						district, the Miusovs. How it came to pass that an heiress, who was
						
						also a beauty, and moreover one of those vigorous intelligent girls,
						
						so common in this generation, but sometimes also to be found in the
						
						last, could have married such a worthless, puny weakling, as we all
						
						called him, I won't attempt to explain. I knew a young lady of the
						
						last "romantic" generation who after some years of an enigmatic
						
						passion for a gentleman, whom she might quite easily have married at
						
						any moment, invented insuperable obstacles to their union, and ended
						
						by throwing herself one stormy night into a rather deep and rapid
						
						river from a high bank, almost a precipice, and so perished,
						
						entirely to satisfy her own caprice, and to be like Shakespeare's
						
						Ophelia. Indeed, if this precipice, a chosen and favourite spot of
						
						hers, had been less picturesque, if there had been a prosaic flat bank
						
						in its place, most likely the suicide would never have taken place.
						
						This is a fact, and probably there have been not a few similar
						
						instances in the last two or three generations. Adelaida Ivanovna
						
						Miusov's action was similarly, no doubt, an echo of other people's
						
						ideas, and was due to the irritation caused by lack of mental freedom.
						
						She wanted, perhaps, to show her feminine independence, to override
						
						class distinctions and the despotism of her family. And a pliable
						
						imagination persuaded her, we must suppose, for a brief moment, that
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch, in spite of his parasitic position, was one of
						
						the bold and ironical spirits of that progressive epoch, though he
						
						was, in fact, an ill-natured buffoon and nothing more. What gave the
						
						marriage piquancy was that it was preceded by an elopement, and this
						
						greatly captivated Adelaida Ivanovna's fancy. Fyodor Pavlovitch's
						
						position at the time made him specially eager for any such enterprise,
						
						for he was passionately anxious to make a career in one way or
						
						another. To attach himself to a good family and obtain a dowry was
						
						an alluring prospect. As for mutual love it did not exist
						
						apparently, either in the bride or in him, in spite of Adelaida
						
						Ivanovna's beauty. This was, perhaps, a unique case of the kind in the
						
						life of Fyodor Pavlovitch, who was always of a voluptuous temper,
						
						and ready to run after any petticoat on the slightest encouragement.
						
						She seems to have been the only woman who made no particular appeal to
						
						his senses.
						
								</p><p id="i_3-p3">Immediatley after the elopement Adelaida Ivanovna discerned in a
						
						flash that she had no feeling for her husband but contempt. The
						
						marriage accordingly showed itself in its true colours with
						
						extraordinary rapidity. Although the family accepted the event
						
						pretty quickly and apportioned the runaway bride her dowry, the
						
						husband and wife began to lead a most disorderly life, and there
						
						were everlasting scenes between them. It was said that the young
						
						wife showed incomparably more generosity and dignity than Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, who, as is now known, got hold of all her money up to
						
						twenty five thousand roubles as soon as she received it, so that those
						
						thousands were lost to her forever. The little village and the
						
						rather fine town house which formed part of her dowry he did his
						
						utmost for a long time to transfer to his name, by means of some
						
						deed of conveyance. He would probably have succeeded, merely from
						
						her moral fatigue and desire to get rid of him, and from the
						
						contempt and loathing he aroused by his persistent and shameless
						
						importunity. But, fortunately, Adelaida Ivanovna's family intervened
						
						and circumvented his greediness. It is known for a fact that
						
						frequent fights took place between the husband and wife, but rumour
						
						had it that Fyodor Pavlovitch did not beat his wife but was beaten
						
						by her, for she was a hot-tempered, bold, dark-browed, impatient
						
						woman, possessed of remarkable physical strength. Finally, she left
						
						the house and ran away from Fyodor Pavlovitch with a destitute
						
						divinity student, leaving Mitya, a child of three years old, in her
						
						husband's hands. Immediately Fyodor Pavlovitch introduced a regular
						
						harem into the house, and abandoned himself to orgies of
						
						drunkenness. In the intervals he used to drive all over the
						
						province, complaining tearfully to each and all of Adelaida Ivanovna's
						
						having left him, going into details too disgraceful for a husband to
						
						mention in regard to his own married life. What seemed to gratify
						
						him and flatter his self-love most was to play the ridiculous part
						
						of the injured husband, and to parade his woes with embellishments.
						
								</p><p id="i_3-p4">"One would think that you'd got a promotion, Fyodor Pavlovitch,
						
						you seem so pleased in spite of your sorrow," scoffers said to him.
						
						Many even added that he was glad of a new comic part in which to
						
						play the buffoon, and that it was simply to make it funnier that he
						
						pretended to be unaware of his ludicrous position. But, who knows,
						
						it may have been simplicity. At last he succeeded in getting on the
						
						track of his runaway wife. The poor woman turned out to be in
						
						Petersburg, where she had gone with her divinity student, and where
						
						she had thrown herself into a life of complete emancipation. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch at once began bustling about, making preparations to go
						
						to Petersburg, with what object he could not himself have said. He
						
						would perhaps have really gone; but having determined to do so he felt
						
						at once entitled to fortify himself for the journey by another bout of
						
						reckless drinking. And just at that time his wife's family received
						
						the news of her death in Petersburg. She had died quite suddenly in
						
						a garret, according to one story, of typhus, or as another version had
						
						it, of starvation. Fyodor Pavlovitch was drunk when he heard of his
						
						wife's death, and the story is that he ran out into the street and
						
						began shouting with joy, raising his hands to Heaven: "Lord, now
						
						lettest Thou Thy servant depart in peace," but others say he wept
						
						without restraint like a little child, so much so that people were
						
						sorry for him, in spite of the repulsion he inspired. It is quite
						
						possible that both versions were true, that he rejoiced at his
						
						release, and at the same time wept for her who released him. As a
						
						general rule, people, even the wicked, are much more naive and
						
						simple-hearted than we suppose. And we ourselves are, too.</p>
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - He Gets Rid of His Eldest Son" prev="i_3" next="iii" id="ii">
						<p id="ii-p1">YOU can easily imagine what a father such a man could be and how
						
						he would bring up his children. His behaviour as a father was
						
						exactly what might be expected. He completely abandoned the child of
						
						his marriage with Adelaida Ivanovna, not from malice, nor because of
						
						his matrimonial grievances, but simply because he forgot him. While he
						
						was wearying everyone with his tears and complaints, and turning his
						
						house into a sink of debauchery, a faithful servant of the family,
						
						Grigory, took the three-year old Mitya into his care. If he hadn't
						
						looked after him there would have been no one even to change the
						
						baby's little shirt.
						
							</p><p id="ii-p2">It happened moreover that the child's relations on his mother's
						
						side forgot him too at first. His grandfather was no longer living,
						
						his widow, Mitya's grandmother, had moved to Moscow, and was seriously
						
						ill, while his daughters were married, so that Mitya remained for
						
						almost a whole year in old Grigory's charge and lived with him in
						
						the servant's cottage. But if his father had remembered him (he
						
						could not, indeed, have been altogether unaware of his existence) he
						
						would have sent him back to the cottage, as the child would only
						
						have been in the way of his debaucheries. But a cousin of Mitya's
						
						mother, Pyotr Alexandrovitch Miusov, happened to return from Paris. He
						
						lived for many years afterwards abroad, but was at that time quite a
						
						young man, and distinguished among the Miusovs as a man of
						
						enlightened ideas and of European culture, who had been in the
						
						capitals and abroad. Towards the end of his life he became a Liberal
						
						of the type common in the forties and fifties. In the course of his
						
						career he had come into contact with many of the most Liberal men of
						
						his epoch, both in Russia and abroad. He had known Proudhon and
						
						Bakunin personally, and in his declining years was very fond of
						
						describing the three days of the Paris Revolution of February, 1848,
						
						hinting that he himself had almost taken part in the fighting on the
						
						barricades. This was one of the most grateful recollections of his
						
						youth. He had an independent property of about a thousand souls, to
						
						reckon in the old style. His splendid estate lay on the outskirts of
						
						our little town and bordered on the lands of our famous monastery,
						
						with which Pyotr Alexandrovitch began an endless lawsuit, almost as
						
						soon as he came into the estate, concerning the rights of fishing in
						
						the river or wood-cutting in the forest, I don't know exactly which.
						
						He regarded it as his duty as a citizen and a man of culture to open
						
						an attack upon the "clericals." Hearing all about Adelaida Ivanovna,
						
						whom he, of course, remembered, and in whom he had at one time been
						
						interested, and learning of the existence of Mitya, he intervened,
						
						in spite of all his youthful indignation and contempt for Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch. He made the latter's acquaintance for the first time,
						
						and told him directly that he wished to undertake the child's
						
						education. He used long afterwards to tell as a characteristic
						
						touch, that when he began to speak of Mitya, Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						looked for some time as though he did not understand what child he was
						
						talking about, and even as though he was surprised to hear that he had
						
						a little son in the house. The story may have been exaggerated, yet it
						
						must have been something like the truth.
						
							</p><p id="ii-p3">Fyodor Pavlovitch was all his life fond of acting, of suddenly
						
						playing an unexpected part, sometimes without any motive for doing so,
						
						and even to his own direct disadvantage, as, for instance, in the
						
						present case. This habit, however, is characteristic of a very great
						
						number of people, some of them very clever ones, not like Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch. Pyotr Alexandrovitch carried the business through
						
						vigorously, and was appointed, with Fyodor Pavlovitch, joint
						
						guardian of the child, who had a small property, a house and land,
						
						left him by his mother. Mitya did, in fact, pass into this cousin's
						
						keeping, but as the latter had no family of his own, and after
						
						securing the revenues of his estates was in haste to return at once to
						
						Paris, he left the boy in charge of one of his cousins, a lady
						
						living in Moscow. It came to pass that, settling permanently in
						
						Paris he, too, forgot the child, especially when the Revolution of
						
						February broke out, making an impression on his mind that he
						
						remembered all the rest of his life. The Moscow lady died, and Mitya
						
						passed into the care of one of her married daughters. I believe he
						
						changed his home a fourth time later on. I won't enlarge upon that
						
						now, as I shall have much to tell later of Fyodor Pavlovitch's
						
						firstborn, and must confine myself now to the most essential facts
						
						about him, without which I could not begin my story.
						
							</p><p id="ii-p4">In the first place, this Mitya, or rather Dmitri Fyodorovitch, was
						
						the only one of Fyodor Pavlovitch's three sons who grew up in the
						
						belief that he had property, and that he would be independent on
						
						coming of age. He spent an irregular boyhood and youth. He did not
						
						finish his studies at the gymnasium, he got into a military school,
						
						then went to the Caucasus, was promoted, fought a duel, and was
						
						degraded to the ranks, earned promotion again, led a wild life, and
						
						spent a good deal of money. He did not begin to receive any income
						
						from Fyodor Pavlovitch until he came of age, and until then got into
						
						debt. He saw and knew his father, Fyodor Pavlovitch, for the first
						
						time on coming of age, when he visited our neighbourhood on purpose to
						
						settle with him about his property. He seems not to have liked his
						
						father. He did not stay long with him, and made haste to get away,
						
						having only succeeded in obtaining a sum of money, and entering into
						
						an agreement for future payments from the estate, of the revenues
						
						and value of which he was unable (a fact worthy of note), upon this
						
						occasion, to get a statement from his father. Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						remarked for the first time then (this, too, should be noted) that
						
						Mitya had a vague and exaggerated idea of his property. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch was very well satisfied with this, as it fell in with his
						
						own designs. He gathered only that the young man was frivolous,
						
						unruly, of violent passions, impatient, and dissipated, and that if he
						
						could only obtain ready money he would be satisfied, although only, of
						
						course, a short time. So Fyodor Pavlovitch began to take advantage
						
						of this fact, sending him from time to time small doles,
						
						instalments. In the end, when four years later, Mitya, losing
						
						patience, came a second time to our little town to settle up once
						
						for all with his father, it turned out to his amazement that he had
						
						nothing, that it was difficult to get an account even, that he had
						
						received the whole value of his property in sums of money from
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch, and was perhaps even in debt to him, that by
						
						various agreements into which he had, of his own desire, entered at
						
						various previous dates, he had no right to expect anything more, and
						
						so on, and so on. The young man was overwhelmed, suspected deceit
						
						and cheating, and was almost beside himself. And, indeed, this
						
						circumstance led to the catastrophe, the account of which forms the
						
						subject of my first introductory story, or rather the external side of
						
						it. But before I pass to that story I must say a little of Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's other two sons, and of their origin.	</p>							
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - The Second Marriage and the Second Family" prev="ii" next="iv" id="iii">
						<p id="iii-p1">VERY shortly after getting his four-year-old Mitya off his hands
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch married a second time. His second marriage lasted
						
						eight years. He took this second wife, Sofya Ivanovna, also a very
						
						young girl, from another province, where he had gone upon some small
						
						piece of business in company with a Jew. Though Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						was a drunkard and a vicious debauchee he never neglected investing
						
						his capital, and managed his business affairs very successfully,
						
						though, no doubt, not over-scrupulously. Sofya Ivanovna was the
						
						daughter of an obscure deacon, and was left from childhood an orphan
						
						without relations. She grew up in the house of a general's widow, a
						
						wealthy old lady of good position, who was at once her benefactress
						
						and tormentor. I do not know the details, but I have only heard that
						
						the orphan girl, a meek and gentle creature, was once cut down from
						
						a halter in which she was hanging from a nail in the loft, so terrible
						
						were her sufferings from the caprice and everlasting nagging of this
						
						old woman, who was apparently not bad-hearted but had become an
						
						insufferable tyrant through idleness.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p2">Fyodor Pavlovitch made her an offer; inquiries were made about him
						
						and he was refused. But again, as in his first marriage, he proposed
						
						an elopement to the orphan girl. There is very little doubt that she
						
						would not on any account have married him if she had known a little
						
						more about him in time. But she lived in another province; besides,
						
						what could a little girl of sixteen know about it, except that she
						
						would be better at the bottom of the river than remaining with her
						
						benefactress. So the poor child exchanged a benefactress for a
						
						benefactor. Fyodor Pavlovitch did not get a penny this time, for the
						
						general's widow was furious. She gave them nothing and cursed them
						
						both. But he had not reckoned on a dowry; what allured him was the
						
						remarkable beauty of the innocent girl, above all her innocent
						
						appearance, which had a peculiar attraction for a vicious
						
						profligate, who had hitherto admired only the coarser types of
						
						feminine beauty.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p3">"Those innocent eyes slit my soul up like a razor," he used to say
						
						afterwards, with his loathsome snigger. In a man so depraved this
						
						might, of course, mean no more than sensual attraction. As he had
						
						received no dowry with his wife, and had, so to speak, taken her "from
						
						the halter," he did not stand on ceremony with her. Making her feel
						
						that she had "wronged" him, he took advantage of her phenomenal
						
						meekness and submissiveness to trample on the elementary decencies
						
						of marriage. He gathered loose women into his house, and carried on
						
						orgies of debauchery in his wife's presence. To show what a pass
						
						things had come to, I may mention that Grigory, the gloomy, stupid,
						
						obstinate, argumentative servant, who had always hated his first
						
						mistress, Adelaida Ivanovna, took the side of his new mistress. He
						
						championed her cause, abusing Fyodor Pavlovitch in a manner little
						
						befitting a servant, and on one occasion broke up the revels and drove
						
						all the disorderly women out of the house. In the end this unhappy
						
						young woman, kept in terror from her childhood, fell into that kind of
						
						nervous disease which is most frequently found in peasant women who
						
						are said to be "possessed by devils." At times after terrible fits
						
						of hysterics she even lost her reason. Yet she bore Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch two sons, Ivan and Alexey, the eldest in the first year
						
						of marriage and the second three years later. When she died, little
						
						Alexey was in his fourth year, and, strange as it seems, I know that
						
						he remembered his mother all his life, like a dream, of course. At her
						
						death almost exactly the same thing happened to the two little boys as
						
						to their elder brother, Mitya. They were completely forgotten and
						
						abandoned by their father. They were looked after by the same
						
						Grigory and lived in his cottage, where they were found by the
						
						tyrannical old lady who had brought up their mother. She was still
						
						alive, and had not, all those eight years, forgotten the insult done
						
						her. All that time she was obtaining exact information as to her
						
						Sofya's manner of life, and hearing of her illness and hideous
						
						surroundings she declared aloud two or three times to her retainers:
						
							</p><p id="iii-p4">"It serves her right. God has punished her for her ingratitude."
						
							</p><p id="iii-p5">Exactly three months after Sofya Ivanovna's death the general's
						
						widow suddenly appeared in our town, and went straight to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's house. She spent only half an hour in the town but she
						
						did a great deal. It was evening. Fyodor Pavlovitch, whom she had
						
						not seen for those eight years, came in to her drunk. The story is
						
						that instantly upon seeing him, without any sort of explanation, she
						
						gave him two good, resounding slaps on the face, seized him by a
						
						tuft of hair, and shook him three times up and down. Then, without a
						
						word, she went straight to the cottage to the two boys. Seeing, at the
						
						first glance, that they were unwashed and in dirty linen, she promptly
						
						gave Grigory, too, a box on the ear, and announcing that she would
						
						carry off both the children she wrapped them just as they were in a
						
						rug, put them in the carriage, and drove off to her own town.
						
						Grigory accepted the blow like a devoted slave, without a word, and
						
						when he escorted the old lady to her carriage he made her a low bow
						
						and pronounced impressively that, "God would repay her for orphans."
						
						"You are a blockhead all the same," the old lady shouted to him as she
						
						drove away.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p6">Fyodor Pavlovitch, thinking it over, decided that it was a good
						
						thing, and did not refuse the general's widow his formal consent to
						
						any proposition in regard to his children's education. As for the
						
						slaps she had given him, he drove all over the town telling the story.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p7">It happened that the old lady died soon after this, but she left
						
						the boys in her will a thousand roubles each "for their instruction,
						
						and so that all be spent on them exclusively, with the condition
						
						that it be so portioned out as to last till they are twenty-one, for
						
						it is more than adequate provision for such children. If other
						
						people think fit to throw away their money, let them." I have not read
						
						the will myself, but I heard there was something queer of the sort,
						
						very whimsically expressed. The principal heir, Yefim Petrovitch
						
						Polenov, the Marshal of Nobility of the province, turned out, however,
						
						to be an honest man. Writing to Fyodor Pavlovitch, and discerning at
						
						once that he could extract nothing from him for his children's
						
						education (though the latter never directly refused but only
						
						procrastinated as he always did in such cases, and was, indeed, at
						
						times effusively sentimental), Yefim Petrovitch took a personal
						
						interest in the orphans. He became especially fond of the younger,
						
						Alexey, who lived for a long while as one of his family. I beg the
						
						reader to note this from the beginning. And to Yefim Petrovitch, a man
						
						of a generosity and humanity rarely to be met with, the young people
						
						were more indebted for their education and bringing up than to anyone.
						
						He kept the two thousand roubles left to them by the general's widow
						
						intact, so that by the time they came of age their portions had been
						
						doubled by the accumulation of interest. He educated them both at
						
						his own expense, and certainly spent far more than a thousand
						
						roubles upon each of them. I won't enter into a detailed account of
						
						their boyhood and youth, but will only mention a few of the most
						
						important events. Of the elder, Ivan, I will only say that he grew
						
						into a somewhat morose and reserved, though far from timid boy. At ten
						
						years old he had realised that they were living not in their own
						
						home but on other people's charity, and that their father was a man of
						
						whom it was disgraceful to speak. This boy began very early, almost in
						
						his infancy (so they say at least), to show a brilliant and unusual
						
						aptitude for learning. I don't know precisely why, but he left the
						
						family of Yefim Petrovitch when he was hardly thirteen, entering a
						
						Moscow gymnasium and boarding with an experienced and celebrated
						
						teacher, an old friend of Yefim Petrovitch. Ivan used to declare
						
						afterwards that this was all due to the "ardour for good works" of
						
						Yefim Petrovitch, who was captivated by the idea that the boy's genius
						
						should be trained by a teacher of genius. But neither Yefim Petrovitch
						
						nor this teacher was living when the young man finished at the
						
						gymnasium and entered the university. As Yefim Petrovitch had made
						
						no provision for the payment of the tyrannical old lady's legacy,
						
						which had grown from one thousand to two, it was delayed, owing to
						
						formalities inevitable in Russia, and the young man was in great
						
						straits for the first two years at the university, as he was forced to
						
						keep himself all the time he was studying. It must be noted that he
						
						did not even attempt to communicate with his father, perhaps from
						
						pride, from contempt for him, or perhaps from his cool common sense,
						
						which told him that from such a father he would get no real
						
						assistance. However that may have been, the young man was by no
						
						means despondent and succeeded in getting work, at first giving
						
						sixpenny lessons and afterwards getting paragraphs on street incidents
						
						into the newspapers under the signature of "Eye-Witness." These
						
						paragraphs, it was said, were so interesting and piquant that they
						
						were soon taken. This alone showed the young man's practical and
						
						intellectual superiority over the masses of needy and unfortunate
						
						students of both sexes who hang about the offices of the newspapers
						
						and journals, unable to think of anything better than everlasting
						
						entreaties for copying and translations from the French. Having once
						
						got into touch with the editors Ivan Fyodorovitch always kept up his
						
						connection with them, and in his latter years at the university he
						
						published brilliant reviews of books upon various special subjects, so
						
						that he became well known in literary circles. But only in his last
						
						year he suddenly succeeded in attracting the attention of a far
						
						wider circle of readers, so that a great many people noticed and
						
						remembered him. It was rather a curious incident. When he had just
						
						left the university and was preparing to go abroad upon his two
						
						thousand roubles, Ivan Fyodorovitch published in one of the more
						
						important journals a strange article, which attracted general
						
						notice, on a subject of which he might have been supposed to know
						
						nothing, as he was a student of natural science. The article dealt
						
						with a subject which was being debated everywhere at the time- the
						
						position of the ecclesiastical courts. After discussing several
						
						opinions on the subject he went on to explain his own view. What was
						
						most striking about the article was its tone, and its unexpected
						
						conclusion. Many of the Church party regarded him unquestioningly as
						
						on their side. And yet not only the secularists but even atheists
						
						joined them in their applause. Finally some sagacious persons opined
						
						that the article was nothing but an impudent satirical burlesque. I
						
						mention this incident particularly because this article penetrated
						
						into the famous monastery in our neighbourhood, where the inmates,
						
						being particularly interested in question of the ecclesiastical
						
						courts, were completely bewildered by it. Learning the author's
						
						name, they were interested in his being a native of the town and the
						
						son of "that Fyodor Pavlovitch." And just then it was that the
						
						author himself made his appearance among us.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p8">Why Ivan Fyodorovitch had come amongst us I remember asking myself
						
						at the time with a certain uneasiness. This fateful visit, which was
						
						the first step leading to so many consequences, I never fully
						
						explained to myself. It seemed strange on the face of it that a
						
						young man so learned, so proud, and apparently so cautious, should
						
						suddenly visit such an infamous house and a father who had ignored him
						
						all his life, hardly knew him, never thought of him, and would not
						
						under any circumstances have given him money, though he was always
						
						afraid that his sons Ivan and Alexey would also come to ask him for
						
						it. And here the young man was staying in the house of such a
						
						father, had been living with him for two months, and they were on
						
						the best possible terms. This last fact was a special cause of
						
						wonder to many others as well as to me. Pyotr Alexandrovitch Miusov,
						
						of whom we have spoken already, the cousin of Fyodor Pavlovitch's
						
						first wife, happened to be in the neighbourhood again on a visit to
						
						his estate. He had come from Paris, which was his permanent home. I
						
						remember that he was more surprised than anyone when he made the
						
						acquaintance of the young man, who interested him extremely, and
						
						with whom he sometimes argued and not without inner pang compared
						
						himself in acquirements.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p9">"He is proud," he used to say, "he will never be in want of pence;
						
						he has got money enough to go abroad now. What does he want here?
						
						Everyone can see that he hasn't come for money, for his father would
						
						never give him any. He has no taste for drink and dissipation, and yet
						
						his father can't do without him. They get on so well together!"
						
							That was the truth; the young man had an unmistakable influence
						
						over his father, who positively appeared to be behaving more
						
						decently and even seemed at times ready to obey his son, though
						
						often extremely and even spitefully perverse.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p10">It was only later that we learned that Ivan had come partly at the
						
						request of, and in the interests of, his elder brother, Dmitri, whom
						
						he saw for the first time on this very visit, though he had before
						
						leaving Moscow been in correspondence with him about an important
						
						matter of more concern to Dmitri than himself. What that business
						
						was the reader will learn fully in due time. Yet even when I did
						
						know of this special circumstance I still felt Ivan Fyodorovitch to be
						
						an enigmatic figure, and thought his visit rather mysterious.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p11">I may add that Ivan appeared at the time in the light of a
						
						mediator between his father and his elder brother Dmitri, who was in
						
						open quarrel with his father and even planning to bring an action
						
						against him.
						
							</p><p id="iii-p12">The family, I repeat, was now united for the first time, and
						
						some of its members met for the first time in their lives. The younger
						
						brother, Alexey, had been a year already among us, having been the
						
						first of the three to arrive. It is of that brother Alexey I find it
						
						most difficult to speak in this introduction. Yet I must give some
						
						preliminary account of him, if only to explain one queer fact, which
						
						is that I have to introduce my hero to the reader wearing the
						
						cassock of a novice. Yes, he had been for the last year in our
						
						monastery, and seemed willing to be cloistered there for the rest of
						
						his life.</p>
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - The Third Son, Alyosha" prev="iii" next="v" id="iv">
						<p id="iv-p1">HE was only twenty, his brother Ivan was in his twenty-fourth year
						
						at the time, while their elder brother Dmitri was twenty-seven.
						
						First of all, I must explain that this young man, Alyosha, was not a
						
						fanatic, and, in my opinion at least, was not even a mystic. I may
						
						as well give my full opinion from the beginning. He was simply an
						
						early lover of humanity, and that he adopted the monastic life was
						
						simply because at that time it struck him, so to say, as the ideal
						
						escape for his soul struggling from the darkness of worldly wickedness
						
						to the light of love. And the reason this life struck him in this
						
						way was that he found in it at that time, as he thought an
						
						extrordinary being, our celebrated elder, Zossima, to whom he became
						
						attached with all the warm first love of his ardent heart. But I do
						
						not dispute that he was very strange even at that time, and had been
						
						so indeed from his cradle. I have mentioned already, by the way,
						
						that though he lost his mother in his fourth year he remembered her
						
						all his life her face, her caresses, "as though she stood living
						
						before me." Such memories may persist, as everyone knows, from an even
						
						earlier age, even from two years old, but scarcely standing out
						
						through a whole lifetime like spots of light out of darkness, like a
						
						corner torn out of a huge picture, which has all faded and disappeared
						
						except that fragment. That is how it was with him. He remembered one
						
						still summer evening, an open window, the slanting rays of the setting
						
						sun (that he recalled most vividly of all); in a corner of the room
						
						the holy image, before it a lighted lamp, and on her knees before
						
						the image his mother, sobbing hysterically with cries and moans,
						
						snatching him up in both arms, squeezing him close till it hurt, and
						
						praying for him to the Mother of God, holding him out in both arms
						
						to the image as though to put him under the Mother's protection... and
						
						suddenly a nurse runs in and snatches him from her in terror. That was
						
						the picture! And Alyosha remembered his mother's face at that
						
						minute. He used to say that it was frenzied but beautiful as he
						
						remembered. But he rarely cared to speak of this memory to anyone.
						
						In his childhood and youth he was by no means expansive, and talked
						
						little indeed, but not from shyness or a sullen unsociability; quite
						
						the contrary, from something different, from a sort of inner
						
						preoccupation entirely personal and unconcerned with other people, but
						
						so important to him that he seemed, as it were, to forget others on
						
						account of it. But he was fond of people: he seemed throughout his
						
						life to put implicit trust in people: yet no one ever looked on him as
						
						a simpleton or naive person. There was something about him which
						
						made one feel at once (and it was so all his life afterwards) that
						
						he did not care to be a judge of others that he would never take it
						
						upon himself to criticise and would never condemn anyone for anything.
						
						He seemed, indeed, to accept everything without the least condemnation
						
						though often grieving bitterly: and this was so much so that no one
						
						could surprise or frighten him even in his earliest youth. Coming at
						
						twenty to his father's house, which was a very sink of filthy
						
						debauchery, he, chaste and pure as he was, simply withdrew in
						
						silence when to look on was unbearable, but without the slightest sign
						
						of contempt or condemnation. His father, who had once been in a
						
						dependent position, and so was sensitive and ready to take offence,
						
						met him at first with distrust and sullenness. "He does not say much,"
						
						he used to say, "and thinks the more." But soon, within a fortnight
						
						indeed, he took to embracing him and kissing him terribly often,
						
						with drunken tears, with sottish sentimentality, yet he evidently felt
						
						a real and deep affection for him, such as he had never been capable
						
						of feeling for anyone before.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p2">Everyone, indeed, loved this young man wherever he went, and it
						
						was so from his earliest childhood. When he entered the household of
						
						his patron and benefactor, Yefim Petrovitch Polenov, he gained the
						
						hearts of all the family, so that they looked on him quite as their
						
						own child. Yet he entered the house at such a tender age that he could
						
						not have acted from design nor artfulness in winning affection. So
						
						that the gift of making himself loved directly and unconsciously was
						
						inherent in him, in his very nature, so to speak. It was the same at
						
						school, though he seemed to be just one of those children who are
						
						distrusted, sometimes ridiculed, and even disliked by their
						
						schoolfellows. He was dreamy, for instance, and rather solitary.
						
						From his earliest childhood he was fond of creeping into a corner to
						
						read, and yet he was a general favourite all the while he was at
						
						school. He was rarely playful or merry, but anyone could see at the
						
						first glance that this was not from any sullenness. On the contrary he
						
						was bright and good-tempered. He never tried to show off among his
						
						schoolfellows. Perhaps because of this, he was never afraid of anyone,
						
						yet the boys immediately understood that he was not proud of his
						
						fearlessness and seemed to be unaware that he was bold and courageous.
						
						He never resented an insult. It would happen that an hour after the
						
						offence he would address the offender or answer some question with
						
						as trustful and candid an expression as though nothing had happened
						
						between them. And it was not that he seemed to have forgotten or
						
						intentionally forgiven the affront, but simply that he did not
						
						regard it as an affront, and this completely conquered and
						
						captivated the boys. He had one characteristic which made all his
						
						schoolfellows from the bottom class to the top want to mock at him,
						
						not from malice but because it amused them. This characteristic was
						
						a wild fanatical modesty and chastity. He could not bear to hear
						
						certain words and certain conversations about women. There are
						
						"certain" words and conversations unhappily impossible to eradicate in
						
						schools. Boys pure in mind and heart, almost children, are fond of
						
						talking in school among themselves, and even aloud, of things,
						
						pictures, and images of which even soldiers would sometimes hesitate
						
						to speak. More than that, much that soldiers have no knowledge or
						
						conception of is familiar to quite young children of our
						
						intellectual and higher classes. There is no moral depravity, no
						
						real corrupt inner cynicism in it, but there is the appearance of
						
						it, and it is often looked upon among them as something refined,
						
						subtle, daring, and worthy of imitation. Seeing that Alyosha Karamazov
						
						put his fingers in his ears when they talked of "that," they used
						
						sometimes to crowd round him, pull his hands away, and shout nastiness
						
						into both ears, while he struggled, slipped to the floor, tried to
						
						hide himself without uttering one word of abuse, enduring their
						
						insults in silence. But at last they left him alone and gave up
						
						taunting him with being a "regular girl," and what's more they
						
						looked upon it with compassion as a weakness. He was always one of the
						
						best in the class but was never first.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p3">At the time of Yefim Petrovitch's death Alyosha had two more years
						
						to complete at the provincial gymnasium. The inconsolable widow went
						
						almost immediately after his death for a long visit to Italy with
						
						her whole family, which consisted only of women and girls. Alyosha
						
						went to live in the house of two distant relations of Yefim
						
						Petrovitch, ladies whom he had never seen before. On what terms she
						
						lived with them he did not know himself. It was very characteristic of
						
						him, indeed, that he never cared at whose expense he was living. In
						
						that respect he was a striking contrast to his elder brother Ivan, who
						
						struggled with poverty for his first two years in the university,
						
						maintained himself by his own efforts, and had from childhood been
						
						bitterly conscious of living at the expense of his benefactor. But
						
						this strange trait in Alyosha's character must not, I think,
						
						criticised too severely, for at the slightest acquaintance with him
						
						anyone would have perceived that Alyosha was one of those youths,
						
						almost of the type of religious enthusiast, who, if they were suddenly
						
						to come into possession of a large fortune, would not hesitate to give
						
						it away for the asking, either for good works or perhaps to a clever
						
						rogue. In general he seemed scarcely to know the value of money,
						
						not, of course, in a literal sense. When he was given pocket-money,
						
						which he never asked for, he was either terribly careless of it so
						
						that it was gone in a moment, or he kept it for weeks together, not
						
						knowing what to do with it.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p4">In later years Pyotr Alexandrovitch Miusov, a man very sensitive
						
						on the score of money and bourgeois honesty, pronounced the
						
						following judgment, after getting to know Alyosha:
						
							</p><p id="iv-p5">"Here is perhaps the one man in the world whom you might leave
						
						alone without a penny, in the centre of an unknown town of a million
						
						inhabitants, and he would not come to harm, he would not die of cold
						
						and hunger, for he would be fed and sheltered at once; and if he
						
						were not, he would find a shelter for himself, and it would cost him
						
						no effort or humiliation. And to shelter him would be no burden,
						
						but, on the contrary, would probably be looked on as a pleasure."
						
							</p><p id="iv-p6">He did not finish his studies at the gymnasium. A year before
						
						the end of the course he suddenly announced to the ladies that he
						
						was going to see his father about a plan which had occurred to him.
						
						They were sorry and unwilling to let him go. The journey was not an
						
						expensive one, and the ladies would not let him pawn his watch, a
						
						parting present from his benefactor's family. They provided him
						
						liberally with money and even fitted him out with new clothes and
						
						linen. But he returned half the money they gave him, saying that he
						
						intended to go third class. On his arrival in the town he made no
						
						answer to his father's first inquiry why he had come before completing
						
						his studies, and seemed, so they say, unusually thoughtful. It soon
						
						became apparent that he was looking for his mother's tomb. He
						
						practically acknowledged at the time that that was the only object
						
						of his visit. But it can hardly have been the whole reason of it. It
						
						is more probable that he himself did not understand and could not
						
						explain what had suddenly arisen in his soul, and drawn him
						
						irresistibly into a new, unknown, but inevitable path. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch could not show him where his second wife was buried, for he
						
						had never visited her grave since he had thrown earth upon her coffin,
						
						and in the course of years had entirely forgotten where she was
						
						buried.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p7">Fyodor Pavlovitch, by the way, had for some time previously not
						
						been living in our town. Three or four years after his wife's death he
						
						had gone to the south of Russia and finally turned up in Odessa, where
						
						he spent several years. He made the acquaintance at first, in his
						
						own words, "of a lot of low Jews, Jewesses, and Jewkins," and ended by
						
						being received by "Jews high and low alike." It may be presumed that
						
						at this period he developed a peculiar faculty for making and hoarding
						
						money. He finally returned to our town only three years before
						
						Alyosha's arrival. His former acquaintances found him looking terribly
						
						aged, although he was by no means an old man. He behaved not exactly
						
						with more dignity but with more effrontery. The former buffoon
						
						showed an insolent propensity for making buffoons of others. His
						
						depravity with women was not as it used to be, but even more
						
						revolting. In a short time he opened a great number of new taverns
						
						in the district. It was evident that he had perhaps a hundred thousand
						
						roubles or not much less. Many of the inhabitants of the town and
						
						district were soon in his debt, and, of course, had given good
						
						security. Of late, too, he looked somehow bloated and seemed more
						
						irresponsible, more uneven, had sunk into a sort of incoherence,
						
						used to begin one thing and go on with another, as though he were
						
						letting himself go altogether. He was more and more frequently
						
						drunk. And, if it had not been for the same servant Grigory, who by
						
						that time had aged considerably too, and used to look after him
						
						sometimes almost like a tutor, Fyodor Pavlovitch might have got into
						
						terrible scrapes. Alyosha's arrival seemed to affect even his moral
						
						side, as though something had awakened in this prematurely old man
						
						which had long been dead in his soul.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p8">"Do you know," he used often to say, looking at Alyosha, "that you
						
						are like her, 'the crazy woman'"- that was what he used to call his
						
						dead wife, Alyosha's mother. Grigory it was who pointed out the "crazy
						
						woman's" grave to Alyosha. He took him to our town cemetery and showed
						
						him in a remote corner a cast-iron tombstone, cheap but decently kept,
						
						on which were inscribed the name and age of the deceased and the
						
						date of her death, and below a four-lined verse, such as are
						
						commonly used on old-fashioned middle-class tombs. To Alyosha's
						
						amazement this tomb turned out to be Grigory's doing. He had put it up
						
						on the poor "crazy woman's" grave at his own expense, after Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, whom he had often pestered about the grave, had gone to
						
						Odessa, abandoning the grave and all his memories. Alyosha showed no
						
						particular emotion at the sight of his mother's grave. He only
						
						listened to Grigory's minute and solemn account of the erection of the
						
						tomb; he stood with bowed head and walked away without uttering a
						
						word. It was perhaps a year before he visited the cemetery again.
						
						But this little episode was not without an influence upon Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch- and a very original one. He suddenly took a thousand
						
						roubles to our monastery to pay for requiems for the soul of his wife;
						
						but not for the second, Alyosha's mother, the "crazy woman," but for
						
						the first, Adelaida Ivanovna, who used to thrash him. In the evening
						
						of the same day he got drunk and abused the monks to Alyosha. He
						
						himself was far from being religious; he had probably never put a
						
						penny candle before the image of a saint. Strange impulses of sudden
						
						feeling and sudden thought are common in such types.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p9">I have mentioned already that he looked bloated. His countenance
						
						at this time bore traces of something that testified unmistakably to
						
						the life he had led. Besides the long fleshy bags under his little,
						
						always insolent, suspicious, and ironical eyes; besides the
						
						multitude of deep wrinkles in his little fat face, the Adam's apple
						
						hung below his sharp chin like a great, fleshy goitre, which gave
						
						him a peculiar, repulsive, sensual appearance; add to that a long
						
						rapacious mouth with full lips, between which could be seen little
						
						stumps of black decayed teeth. He slobbered every time he began to
						
						speak. He was fond indeed of making fun of his own face, though, I
						
						believe, he was well satisfied with it. He used particularly to
						
						point to his nose, which was not very large, but very delicate and
						
						conspicuously aquiline. "A regular Roman nose," he used to say,
						
						"with my goitre I've quite the countenance of an ancient Roman
						
						patrician of the decadent period." He seemed proud of it.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p10">Not long after visiting his mother's grave Alyosha suddenly
						
						announced that he wanted to enter the monastery, and that the monks
						
						were willing to receive him as a novice. He explained that this was
						
						his strong desire, and that he was solemnly asking his consent as
						
						his father. The old man knew that the elder Zossima, who was living in
						
						the monastery hermitage, had made a special impression upon his
						
						"gentle boy."
						
							</p><p id="iv-p11">"That is the most honest monk among them, of course," he observed,
						
						after listening in thoughtful silence to Alyosha, and seeming scarcely
						
						surprised at his request. "H'm!... So that's where you want to be,
						
						my gentle boy?"
						
							</p><p id="iv-p12">He was half drunk, and suddenly he grinned his slow half-drunken
						
						grin, which was not without a certain cunning and tipsy slyness.
						
						"H'm!... I had a presentiment that you would end in something like
						
						this. Would you believe it? You were making straight for it. Well,
						
						to be sure you have your own two thousand. That's a dowry for you. And
						
						I'll never desert you, my angel. And I'll pay what's wanted for you
						
						there, if they ask for it. But, of course, if they don't ask, why
						
						should we worry them? What do you say? You know, you spend money
						
						like a canary, two grains a week. H'm!... Do you know that near one
						
						monastery there's a place outside the town where every baby knows
						
						there are none but 'the monks' wives' living, as they are called.
						
						Thirty women, I believe. I have been there myself. You know, it's
						
						interesting in its way, of course, as a variety. The worst of it is
						
						it's awfully Russian. There are no French women there. Of course, they
						
						could get them fast enough, they have plenty of money. If they get
						
						to hear of it they'll come along. Well, there's nothing of that sort
						
						here, no 'monks' wives,' and two hundred monks. They're honest. They
						
						keep the fasts. I admit it.... H'm.... So you want to be a monk? And
						
						do you know I'm sorry to lose you, Alyosha; would you believe it, I've
						
						really grown fond of you? Well, it's a good opportunity. You'll pray
						
						for us sinners; we have sinned too much here. I've always been
						
						thinking who would pray for me, and whether there's anyone in the
						
						world to do it. My dear boy, I'm awfully stupid about that. You
						
						wouldn't believe it. Awfully. You see, however stupid I am about it, I
						
						keep thinking, I keep thinking- from time to time, of course, not
						
						all the while. It's impossible, I think, for the devils to forget to
						
						drag me down to hell with their hooks when I die. Then I wonder-
						
						hooks? Where would they get them? What of? Iron hooks? Where do they
						
						forge them? Have they a foundry there of some sort? The monks in the
						
						monastery probably believe that there's a ceiling in hell, for
						
						instance. Now I'm ready to believe in hell, but without a ceiling.
						
						It makes it more refined, more enlightened, more Lutheran that is.
						
						And, after all, what does it matter whether it has a ceiling or
						
						hasn't? But, do you know, there's a damnable question involved in
						
						it? If there's no ceiling there can be no hooks, and if there are no
						
						hooks it all breaks down, which is unlikely again, for then there
						
						would be none to drag me down to hell, and if they don't drag me
						
						down what justice is there in the world? Il faudrait les inventer,*
						
						those hooks, on purpose for me alone, for, if you only knew,
						
						Alyosha, what a black-guard I am."		
						
							</p><p id="iv-p13">* It would be neccessary to invent them.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p14">"But there are no hooks there," said Alyosha, looking gently and
						
						seriously at his father.
						
							</p><p id="iv-p15">"Yes, yes, only the shadows of hooks. I know, I know. That's how a
						
						Frenchman described hell: 'J'ai vu l'ombre d'un cocher qui avec
						
						l'ombre d'une brosse frottait l'ombre d'une carrosse.'* How do you
						
						know there are no hooks, darling? When you've lived with the monks
						
						you'll sing a different tune. But go and get at the truth there, and
						
						then come and tell me. Anyway it's easier going to the other world
						
						if one knows what there is there. Besides, it will be more seemly
						
						for you with the monks than here with me, with a drunken old man and
						
						young harlots... though you're like an angel, nothing touches you. And
						
						I dare say nothing will touch you there. That's why I let you go,
						
						because I hope for that. You've got all your wits about you. You
						
						will burn and you will burn out; you will be healed and come back
						
						again. And I will wait for you. I feel that you're the only creature
						
						in the world who has not condemned me. My dear boy, I feel it, you
						
						know. I can't help feeling it."
						
							</p><p id="iv-p16">* I've seen the shadow of a coachman rubbing the shadow of a coach
						
						with the shadow of a brush.
												
							</p><p id="iv-p17">And he even began blubbering. He was sentimental. He was wicked
						
						and sentimental.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - Elders" prev="iv" next="ii_1" id="v">
						<p id="v-p1">SOME of my readers may imagine that my young man was a sickly,
						
						ecstatic, poorly developed creature, a pale, consumptive dreamer. On
						
						the contrary, Alyosha was at this time a well-grown, red-cheeked,
						
						clear-eyed lad of nineteen, radiant with health. He was very handsome,
						
						too, graceful, moderately tall, with hair of a dark brown, with a
						
						regular, rather long, oval-shaped face, and wide-set dark grey,
						
						shining eyes; he was very thoughtful, and apparently very serene. I
						
						shall be told, perhaps, that red cheeks are not incompatible with
						
						fanaticism and mysticism; but I fancy that Alyosha was more of a
						
						realist than anyone. Oh! no doubt, in the monastery he fully
						
						believed in miracles, but, to my thinking, miracles are never a
						
						stumbling-block to the realist. It is not miracles that dispose
						
						realists to belief. The genuine realist, if he is an unbeliever,
						
						will always find strength and ability to disbelieve in the miraculous,
						
						and if he is confronted with a miracle as an irrefutable fact he would
						
						rather disbelieve his own senses than admit the fact. Even if he
						
						admits it, he admits it as a fact of nature till then unrecognised
						
						by him. Faith does not, in the realist, spring from the miracle but
						
						the miracle from faith. If the realist once believes, then he is bound
						
						by his very realism to admit the miraculous also. The Apostle Thomas
						
						said that he would not believe till he saw, but when he did see he
						
						said, "My Lord and my God!" Was it the miracle forced him to
						
						believe? Most likely not, but he believed solely because he desired to
						
						believe and possibly he fully believed in his secret heart even when
						
						he said, "I do not believe till I see."
						
							</p><p id="v-p2">I shall be told, perhaps, that Alyosha was stupid, undeveloped,
						
						had not finished his studies, and so on. That he did not finish his
						
						studies is true, but to say that he was stupid or dull would be a
						
						great injustice. I'll simply repeat what I have said above. He entered
						
						upon this path only because, at that time, it alone struck his
						
						imagination and presented itself to him as offering an ideal means
						
						of escape for his soul from darkness to light. Add to that that he was
						
						to some extent a youth of our last epoch- that is, honest in nature,
						
						desiring the truth, seeking for it and believing in it, and seeking to
						
						serve it at once with all the strength of his soul, seeking for
						
						immediate action, and ready to sacrifice everything, life itself,
						
						for it. Though these young men unhappily fail to understand that the
						
						sacrifice of life is, in many cases, the easiest of all sacrifices,
						
						and that to sacrifice, for instance, five or six years of their
						
						seething youth to hard and tedious study, if only to multiply
						
						tenfold their powers of serving the truth and the cause they have
						
						set before them as their goal such a sacrifice is utterly beyond the
						
						strength of many of them. The path Alyosha chose was a path going in
						
						the opposite direction, but he chose it with the same thirst for swift
						
						achievement. As soon as he reflected seriously he was convinced of the
						
						existence of God and immortality, and at once he instinctively said to
						
						himself: "I want to live for immortality, and I will accept no
						
						compromise." In the same way, if he had decided that God and
						
						immortality did not exist, he would at once have become an atheist and
						
						a socialist. For socialism is not merely the labour question, it is
						
						before all things the atheistic question, the question of the form
						
						taken by atheism to-day, the question of the tower of Babel built
						
						without God, not to mount to heaven from earth but to set up heaven on
						
						earth. Alyosha would have found it strange and impossible to go on
						
						living as before. It is written: "Give all that thou hast to the
						
						poor and follow Me, if thou wouldst be perfect."
						
							</p><p id="v-p3">Alyosha said to himself: "I can't give two roubles instead of
						
						'all,' and only go to mass instead of 'following Him.'" Perhaps his
						
						memories of childhood brought back our monastery, to which his
						
						mother may have taken him to mass. Perhaps the slanting sunlight and
						
						the holy image to which his poor "crazy" mother had held him up
						
						still acted upon his imagination. Brooding on these things he may have
						
						come to us perhaps only to see whether here he could sacrifice all
						
						or only "two roubles," and in the monastery he met this elder. I
						
						must digress to explain what an "elder" is in Russian monasteries, and
						
						I am sorry that I do not feel very competent to do so. I will try,
						
						however, to give a superficial account of it in a few words.
						
						Authorities on the subject assert that the institution of "elders"
						
						is of recent date, not more than a hundred years old in our
						
						monasteries, though in the orthodox East, especially in Sinai and
						
						Athos, it has existed over a thousand years. It is maintained that
						
						it existed in ancient times in Russia also, but through the calamities
						
						which overtook Russia- the Tartars, civil war, the interruption of
						
						relations with the East after the destruction of Constantinople-
						
						this institution fell into oblivion. It was revived among us towards
						
						the end of last century by one of the great "ascetics," as they called
						
						him, Paissy Velitchkovsky, and his disciples. But to this day it
						
						exists in few monasteries only, and has sometimes been almost
						
						persecuted as an innovation in Russia. It flourished especially in the
						
						celebrated Kozelski Optin Monastery. When and how it was introduced
						
						into our monastery I cannot say. There had already been three such
						
						elders and Zossima was the last of them. But he was almost dying of
						
						weakness and disease, and they had no one to take his place. The
						
						question for our monastery was an important one, for it had not been
						
						distinguished by anything in particular till then: they had neither
						
						relics of saints, nor wonder- working ikons, nor glorious
						
						traditions, nor historical exploits. It had flourished and been
						
						glorious all over Russia through its elders, to see and hear whom
						
						pilgrims had flocked for thousands of miles from all parts.
						
							</p><p id="v-p4">What was such an elder? An elder was one who took your soul,
						
						your will, into his soul and his will. When you choose an elder, you
						
						renounce your own will and yield it to him in complete submission,
						
						complete self-abnegation. This novitiate, this terrible school of
						
						abnegation, is undertaken voluntarily, in the hope of self-conquest,
						
						of self-mastery, in order, after a life of obedience, to attain
						
						perfect freedom, that is, from self; to escape the lot of those who
						
						have lived their whole life without finding their true selves in
						
						themselves. This institution of elders is not founded on theory, but
						
						was established in the East from the practice of a thousand years. The
						
						obligations due to an elder are not the ordinary "obedience" which has
						
						always existed in our Russian monasteries. The obligation involves
						
						confession to the elder by all who have submitted themselves to him,
						
						and to the indissoluble bond between him and them.
						
							</p><p id="v-p5">The story is told, for instance, that in the early days of
						
						Christianity one such novice, failing to fulfil some command laid upon
						
						him by his elder, left his monastery in Syria and went to Egypt.
						
						There, after great exploits, he was found worthy at last to suffer
						
						torture and a martyr's death for the faith. When the Church, regarding
						
						him as a saint, was burying him, suddenly, at the deacon's
						
						exhortation, "Depart all ye unbaptised," the coffin containing the
						
						martyr's body left its place and was cast forth from the church, and
						
						this took place three times. And only at last they learnt that this
						
						holy man had broken his vow of obedience and left his elder, and,
						
						therefore, could not be forgiven without the elder's absolution in
						
						spite of his great deeds. Only after this could the funeral take
						
						place. This, of course, is only an old legend. But here is a recent
						
						instance.
						
							</p><p id="v-p6">A monk was suddenly commanded by his elder to quit Athos, which he
						
						loved as a sacred place and a haven of refuge, and to go first to
						
						Jerusalem to do homage to the Holy Places and then to go to the
						
						north to Siberia: "There is the place for thee and not here." The
						
						monk, overwhelmed with sorrow, went to the Oecumenical Patriarch at
						
						Constantinople and besought him to release him from his obedience. But
						
						the Patriarch replied that not only was he unable to release him,
						
						but there was not and could not be on earth a power which could
						
						release him except the elder who had himself laid that duty upon
						
						him. In this way the elders are endowed in certain cases with
						
						unbounded and inexplicable authority. That is why in many of our
						
						monasteries the institution was at first resisted almost to
						
						persecution. Meantime the elders immediately began to be highly
						
						esteemed among the people. Masses of the ignorant people as well as of
						
						distinction flocked, for instance, to the elders of our monastery to
						
						confess their doubts, their sins, and their sufferings, and ask for
						
						counsel and admonition. Seeing this, the opponents of the elders
						
						declared that the sacrament of confession was being arbitrarily and
						
						frivolously degraded, though the continual opening of the heart to the
						
						elder by the monk or the layman had nothing of the character of the
						
						sacrament. In the end, however, the institution of elders has been
						
						retained and is becoming established in Russian monasteries. It is
						
						true, perhaps, that this instrument which had stood the test of a
						
						thousand years for the moral regeneration of a man from slavery to
						
						freedom and to moral perfectibility may be a two-edged weapon and it
						
						may lead some not to humility and complete self-control but to the
						
						most Satanic pride, that is, to bondage and not to freedom.
						
							</p><p id="v-p7">The elder Zossima was sixty-five. He came of a family of
						
						landowners, had been in the army in early youth, and served in the
						
						Caucasus as an officer. He had, no doubt, impressed Alyosha by some
						
						peculiar quality of his soul. Alyosha lived in the cell of the
						
						elder, who was very fond of him and let him wait upon him. It must
						
						be noted that Alyosha was bound by no obligation and could go where he
						
						pleased and be absent for whole days. Though he wore the monastic
						
						dress it was voluntarily, not to be different from others. No doubt he
						
						liked to do so. Possibly his youthful imagination was deeply stirred
						
						by the power and fame of his elder. It was said that so many people
						
						had for years past come to confess their sins to Father Zossima and to
						
						entreat him for words of advice and healing, that he had acquired
						
						the keenest intuition and could tell from an unknown face what a
						
						new-comer wanted, and what was the suffering on his conscience. He
						
						sometimes astounded and almost alarmed his visitors by his knowledge
						
						of their secrets before they had spoken a word.
						
							</p><p id="v-p8">Alyosha noticed that many, almost all, went in to the elder for
						
						the first time with apprehension and uneasiness, but came out with
						
						bright and happy faces. Alyosha was particularly struck by the fact
						
						that Father Zossima was not at all stern. On the contrary, he was
						
						always almost gay. The monks used to say that he was more drawn to
						
						those who were more sinful, and the greater the sinner the more he
						
						loved him. There were, no doubt, up to the end of his life, among
						
						the monks some who hated and envied him, but they were few in number
						
						and they were silent, though among them were some of great dignity
						
						in the monastery, one, for instance, of the older monks
						
						distinguished for his strict keeping of fasts and vows of silence. But
						
						the majority were on Father Zossima's side and very many of them loved
						
						him with all their hearts, warmly and sincerely. Some were almost
						
						fanatically devoted to him, and declared, though not quite aloud, that
						
						he was a saint, that there could be no doubt of it, and, seeing that
						
						his end was near, they anticipated miracles and great glory to the
						
						monastery in the immediate future from his relics. Alyosha had
						
						unquestioning faith in the miraculous power of the elder, just as he
						
						had unquestioning faith in the story of the coffin that flew out of
						
						the church. He saw many who came with sick children or relatives and
						
						besought the elder to lay hands on them and to pray over them,
						
						return shortly after- some the next day- and, falling in tears at
						
						the elder's feet, thank him for healing their sick.
						
							</p><p id="v-p9">Whether they had really been healed or were simply better in the
						
						natural course of the disease was a question which did not exist for
						
						Alyosha, for he fully believed in the spiritual power of his teacher
						
						and rejoiced in his fame, in his glory, as though it were his own
						
						triumph. His heart throbbed, and he beamed, as it were, all over
						
						when the elder came out to the gates of the hermitage into the waiting
						
						crowd of pilgrims of the humbler class who had flocked from all
						
						parts of Russia on purpose to see the elder and obtain his blessing.
						
						They fell down before him, wept, kissed his feet, kissed the earth
						
						on which he stood, and wailed, while the women held up their
						
						children to him and brought him the sick "possessed with devils."
						
						The elder spoke to them, read a brief prayer over them, blessed
						
						them, and dismissed them. Of late he had become so weak through
						
						attacks of illness that he was sometimes unable to leave his cell, and
						
						the pilgrims waited for him to come out for several days. Alyosha
						
						did not wonder why they loved him so, why they fell down before him
						
						and wept with emotion merely at seeing his face. Oh! he understood
						
						that for the humble soul of the Russian peasant, worn out by grief and
						
						toil, and still more by the everlasting injustice and everlasting sin,
						
						his own and the world's, it was the greatest need and comfort to
						
						find someone or something holy to fall down before and worship.
						
							</p><p id="v-p10">"Among us there is sin, injustice, and temptation, but yet,
						
						somewhere on earth there is someone holy and exalted. He has the
						
						truth; he knows the truth; so it is not dead upon the earth; so it
						
						will come one day to us, too, and rule over all the earth according to
						
						the promise."
						
							</p><p id="v-p11">Alyosha knew that this was just how the people felt and even
						
						reasoned. He understood it, but that the elder Zossima was this
						
						saint and custodian of God's truth- of that he had no more doubt
						
						than the weeping peasants and the sick women who held out their
						
						children to the elder. The conviction that after his death the elder
						
						would bring extraordinary glory to the monastery was even stronger
						
						in Alyosha than in anyone there, and, of late, a kind of deep flame of
						
						inner ecstasy burnt more and more strongly in his heart. He was not at
						
						all troubled at this elder's standing as a solitary example before
						
						him.
						
							</p><p id="v-p12">"No matter. He is holy. He carries in his heart the secret of
						
						renewal for all: that power which will, at last, establish truth on
						
						the earth, and all men will be holy and love one another, and there
						
						will be no more rich nor poor, no exalted nor humbled, but all will be
						
						as the children of God, and the true Kingdom of Christ will come."
						
						That was the dream in Alyosha's heart.
						
							</p><p id="v-p13">The arrival of his two brothers, whom he had not known till
						
						then, seemed to make a great impression on Alyosha. He more quickly
						
						made friends with his half-brother Dmitri (though he arrived later)
						
						than with his own brother Ivan. He was extremely interested in his
						
						brother Ivan, but when the latter had been two months in the town,
						
						though they had met fairly often, they were still not intimate.
						
						Alyosha was naturally silent, and he seemed to be expecting something,
						
						ashamed about something, while his brother Ivan, though Alyosha
						
						noticed at first that he looked long and curiously at him, seemed soon
						
						to have left off thinking of him. Alyosha noticed it with some
						
						embarrassment. He ascribed his brother's indifference at first to
						
						the disparity of their age and education. But he also wondered whether
						
						the absence of curiosity and sympathy in Ivan might be due to some
						
						other cause entirely unknown to him. He kept fancying that Ivan was
						
						absorbed in something- something inward and important- that he was
						
						striving towards some goal, perhaps very hard to attain, and that that
						
						was why he had no thought for him. Alyosha wondered, too, whether
						
						there was not some contempt on the part of the learned atheist for
						
						him- a foolish novice. He knew for certain that his brother was an
						
						atheist. He could not take offence at this contempt, if it existed;
						
						yet, with an uneasy embarrassment which he did not himself understand,
						
						he waited for his brother to come nearer to him. Dmitri used to
						
						speak of Ivan with the deepest respect and with a peculiar
						
						earnestness. From him Alyosha learnt all the details of the
						
						important affair which had of late formed such a close and
						
						remarkable bond between the two elder brothers. Dmitri's
						
						enthusiastic references to Ivan were the more striking in Alyosha's
						
						eyes since Dmitri was, compared with Ivan, almost uneducated, and
						
						the two brothers were such a contrast in personality and character
						
						that it would be difficult to find two men more unlike.
						
							</p><p id="v-p14">It was at this time that the meeting, or, rather gathering of
						
						the members of this inharmonious family took place in the cell of
						
						the elder who had such an extraordinary influence on Alyosha. The
						
						pretext for this gathering was a false one. It was at this time that
						
						the discord between Dmitri and his father seemed at its acutest
						
						stage and their relations had become insufferably strained. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch seems to have been the first to suggest, apparently in
						
						joke, that they should all meet in Father Zossima's cell, and that,
						
						without appealing to his direct intervention, they might more decently
						
						come to an understanding under the conciliating influence of the
						
						elder's presence. Dmitri, who had never seen the elder, naturally
						
						supposed that his father was trying to intimidate him, but, as he
						
						secretly blamed himself for his outbursts of temper with his father on
						
						several recent occasions, he accepted the challenge. It must be
						
						noted that he was not, like Ivan, staying with his father, but
						
						living apart at the other end of the town. It happened that Pyotr
						
						Alexandrovitch Miusov, who was staying in the district at the time,
						
						caught eagerly at the idea. A Liberal of the forties and fifties, a
						
						freethinker and atheist, he may have been led on by boredom or the
						
						hope of frivolous diversion. He was suddenly seized with the desire to
						
						see the monastery and the holy man. As his lawsuit with the
						
						monastery still dragged on, he made it the pretext for seeing the
						
						Superior, in order to attempt to settle it amicably. A visitor
						
						coming with such laudable intentions might be received with more
						
						attention and consideration than if he came from simple curiosity.
						
						Influences from within the monastery were brought to bear on the
						
						elder, who of late had scarcely left his cell, and had been forced
						
						by illness to deny even his ordinary visitors. In the end he consented
						
						to see them, and the day was fixed.
						
							</p><p id="v-p15">"Who has made me a judge over them?" was all he said, smilingly,
						
						to Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="v-p16">Alyosha was much perturbed when he heard of the proposed visit. Of
						
						all the wrangling, quarrelsome party, Dmitri was the only one who
						
						could regard the interview seriously. All the others would come from
						
						frivolous motives, perhaps insulting to the elder. Alyosha was well
						
						aware of that. Ivan and Miusov would come from curiosity, perhaps of
						
						the coarsest kind, while his father might be contemplating some
						
						piece of buffoonery. Though he said nothing, Alyosha thoroughly
						
						understood his father. The boy, I repeat, was far from being so simple
						
						as everyone thought him. He awaited the day with a heavy heart. No
						
						doubt he was always pondering in his mind how the family discord could
						
						be ended. But his chief anxiety concerned the elder. He trembled for
						
						him, for his glory, and dreaded any affront to him, especially the
						
						refined, courteous irony of Miusov and the supercilious
						
						half-utterances of the highly educated Ivan. He even wanted to venture
						
						on warning the elder, telling him something about them, but, on second
						
						thoughts, said nothing. He only sent word the day before, through a
						
						friend, to his brother Dmitri, that he loved him and expected him to
						
						keep his promise. Dmitri wondered, for he could not remember what he
						
						had promised, but he answered by letter that he would do his utmost
						
						not to let himself be provoked "by vileness," but that, although he
						
						had a deep respect for the elder and for his brother Ivan, he was
						
						convinced that the meeting was either a trap for him or an unworthy
						
						farce.
						
							</p><p id="v-p17">"Nevertheless I would rather bite out my tongue than be lacking in
						
						respect to the sainted man whom you reverence so highly," he wrote
						
						in conclusion. Alyosha was not greatly cheered by the letter.</p>					
					
					</div4>			
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book II - An Unfortunate Gathering" prev="v" next="i_4" id="ii_1">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - They Arrive at the Monastery" prev="ii_1" next="ii_2" id="i_4">
						<p id="i_4-p1">IT was a warm, bright day the end of August. The interview with
						
						the elder had been fixed for half-past eleven, immediately after
						
						late mass. Our visitors did not take part in the service, but
						
						arrived just as it was over. First an elegant open carriage, drawn
						
						by two valuable horses, drove up with Miusov and a distant relative of
						
						his, a young man of twenty, called Pyotr Fomitch Kalganov. This
						
						young man was preparing to enter the university. Miusov with whom he
						
						was staying for the time, was trying to persuade him to go abroad to
						
						the university of Zurich or Jena. The young man was still undecided.
						
						He was thoughtful and absent-minded. He was nice-looking, strongly
						
						built, and rather tall. There was a strange fixity in his gaze at
						
						times. Like all very absent-minded people he would sometimes stare
						
						at a person without seeing him. He was silent and rather awkward,
						
						but sometimes, when he was alone with anyone, he became talkative
						
						and effusive, and would laugh at anything or nothing. But his
						
						animation vanished as quickly as it appeared. He was always well and
						
						even elaborately dressed; he had already some independent fortune
						
						and expectations of much more. He was a friend of Alyosha's.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p2">In an ancient, jolting, but roomy, hired carriage, with a pair
						
						of old pinkish-grey horses, a long way behind Miusov's carriage,
						
						came Fyodor Pavlovitch, with his son Ivan. Dmitri was late, though
						
						he had been informed of the time the evening before. The visitors left
						
						their carriage at the hotel, outside the precincts, and went to the
						
						gates of the monastery on foot. Except Fyodor Pavlovitch, more of
						
						the party had ever seen the monastery, and Miusov had probably not
						
						even been to church for thirty years. He looked about him with
						
						curiosity, together with assumed ease. But, except the church and
						
						the domestic buildings, though these too were ordinary enough, he
						
						found nothing of interest in the interior of the monastery. The last
						
						of the worshippers were coming out of the church bareheaded and
						
						crossing themselves. Among the humbler people were a few of higher
						
						rank- two or three ladies and a very old general. They were all
						
						staying at the hotel. Our visitors were at once surrounded by beggars,
						
						but none of them gave them anything, except young Kalganov, who took a
						
						ten-copeck piece out of his purse, and, nervous and embarrassed- God
						
						knows why!- hurriedly gave it to an old woman, saying: "Divide it
						
						equally." None of his companions made any remark upon it, so that he
						
						had no reason to be embarrassed; but, perceiving this, he was even
						
						more overcome.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p3">It was strange that their arrival did not seem expected, and
						
						that they were not received with special honour, though one of them
						
						had recently made a donation of a thousand roubles, while another
						
						was a very wealthy and highly cultured landowner, upon whom all in the
						
						monastery were in a sense dependent, as a decision of the lawsuit
						
						might at any moment put their fishing rights in his hands. Yet no
						
						official personage met them.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p4">Miusov looked absent-mindedly at the tombstones round the
						
						church, and was on the point of saying that the dead buried here
						
						must have paid a pretty penny for the right of lying in this "holy
						
						place," but refrained. His liberal irony was rapidly changing almost
						
						into anger.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p5">"Who the devil is there to ask in this imbecile place? We must
						
						find out, for time is passing," he observed suddenly, as though
						
						speaking to himself.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p6">All at once there came up a bald-headed, elderly man with
						
						ingratiating little eyes, wearing a full, summer overcoat. Lifting his
						
						hat, he introduced himself with a honeyed lisp as Maximov, a landowner
						
						of Tula. He at once entered into our visitors' difficulty.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p7">"Father Zossima lives in the hermitage, apart, four hundred
						
						paces from the monastery, the other side of the copse."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p8">"I know it's the other side of the copse," observed Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, "but we don't remember the way. It is a long time since
						
						we've been here."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p9">"This way, by this gate, and straight across the copse... the
						
						copse. Come with me, won't you? I'll show you. I have to go.... I am
						
						going myself. This way, this way."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p10">They came out of the gate and turned towards the copse. Maximov, a
						
						man of sixty, ran rather than walked, turning sideways to stare at
						
						them all, with an incredible degree of nervous curiosity. His eyes
						
						looked starting out of his head.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p11">"You see, we have come to the elder upon business of our own,"
						
						observed Miusov severely. "That personage has granted us an
						
						audience, so to speak, and so, though we thank you for showing us
						
						the way, we cannot ask you to accompany us."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p12">"I've been there. I've been already; un chevalier parfait," and
						
						Maximov snapped his fingers in the air.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p13">"Who is a chevalier?" asked Miusov.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p14">"The elder, the splendid elder, the elder! The honour and glory of
						
						the monastery, Zossima. Such an elder!"
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p15">But his incoherent talk was cut short by a very pale,
						
						wan-looking monk of medium height wearing a monk's cap, who overtook
						
						them. Fyodor Pavlovitch and Miusov stopped.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p16">The monk, with an extremely courteous, profound bow, announced:
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p17">"The Father Superior invites all of you gentlemen to dine with him
						
						after your visit to the hermitage. At one o'clock, not later. And
						
						you also," he added, addressing Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p18">"That I certainly will, without fail," cried Fyodor Pavlovitch,
						
						hugely delighted at the invitation. "And, believe me, we've all
						
						given our word to behave properly here.... And you, Pyotr
						
						Alexandrovitch, will you go, too?"
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p19">"Yes, of course. What have I come for but to study all the customs
						
						here? The only obstacle to me is your company...."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p20">"Yes, Dmitri Fyodorovitch is non-existent as yet."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p21">"It would be a capital thing if he didn't turn up. Do you
						
						suppose I like all this business, and in your company, too? So we will
						
						come to dinner. Thank the Father Superior," he said to the monk.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p22">"No, it is my duty now to conduct you to the elder," answered
						
						the monk.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p23">"If so I'll go straight to the Father Superior- to the Father
						
						Superior," babbled Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p24">"The Father Superior is engaged just now. But as you please- " the
						
						monk hesitated.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p25">"Impertinent old man!" Miusov observed aloud, while Maximov ran
						
						back to the monastery.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p26">"He's like von Sohn," Fyodor Pavlovitch said suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p27">"Is that all you can think of?... In what way is he like von Sohn?
						
						Have you ever seen von Sohn?"
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p28">"I've seen his portrait. It's not the features, but something
						
						indefinable. He's a second von Sohn. I can always tell from the
						
						physiognomy."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p29">"Ah, I dare say you are a connoisseur in that. But, look here,
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch, you said just now that we had given our word to
						
						behave properly. Remember it. I advise you to control yourself. But,
						
						if you begin to play the fool I don't intend to be associated with you
						
						here... You see what a man he is"- he turned to the monk- "I'm
						
						afraid to go among decent people with him." A fine smile, not
						
						without a certain slyness, came on to the pale, bloodless lips of
						
						the monk, but he made no reply, and was evidently silent from a
						
						sense of his own dignity. Miusov frowned more than ever.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p30">"Oh, devil take them all! An outer show elaborated through
						
						centuries, and nothing but charlatanism and nonsense underneath,"
						
						flashed through Miusov's mind.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p31">"Here's the hermitage. We've arrived," cried Fyodor Pavlovitch.
						
						"The gates are shut."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p32">And he repeatedly made the sign of the cross to the saints painted
						
						above and on the sides of the gates.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p33">"When you go to Rome you must do as the Romans do. Here in this
						
						hermitage there are twenty-five saints being saved. They look at one
						
						another, and eat cabbages. And not one woman goes in at this gate.
						
						That's what is remarkable. And that really is so. But I did hear
						
						that the elder receives ladies," he remarked suddenly to the monk.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p34">"Women of the people are here too now, lying in the portico
						
						there waiting. But for ladies of higher rank two rooms have been built
						
						adjoining the portico, but outside the precincts you can see the
						
						windows- and the elder goes out to them by an inner passage when he is
						
						well enough. They are always outside the precincts. There is a
						
						Harkov lady, Madame Hohlakov, waiting there now with her sick
						
						daughter. Probably he has promised to come out to her, though of
						
						late he has been so weak that he has hardly shown himself even to
						
						the people."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p35">"So then there are loopholes, after all, to creep out of the
						
						hermitage to the ladies. Don't suppose, holy father, that I mean any
						
						harm. But do you know that at Athos not only the visits of women are
						
						not allowed, but no creature of the female sex- no hens, nor turkey
						
						hens, nor cows."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p36">"Fyodor Pavlovitch, I warn you I shall go back and leave you here.
						
						They'll turn you out when I'm gone."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p37">"But I'm not interfering with you, Pyotr Alexandrovitch. Look," he
						
						cried suddenly, stepping within the precincts, "what a vale of roses
						
						they live in!"
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p38">Though there were no roses now, there were numbers of rare and
						
						beautiful autumn flowers growing wherever there was space for them,
						
						and evidently tended by a skilful hand; there were flower-beds round
						
						the church, and between the tombs; and the one-storied wooden house
						
						where the elder lived was also surrounded with flowers.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p39">"And was it like this in the time of the last elder, Varsonofy? He
						
						didn't care for such elegance. They say he used to jump up and
						
						thrash even ladies with a stick," observed Fyodor Pavlovitch, as he
						
						went up the steps.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p40">"The elder Varsonofy did sometimes seem rather strange, but a
						
						great deal that's told is foolishness. He never thrashed anyone,"
						
						answered the monk. "Now, gentlemen, if you will wait a minute I will
						
						announce you."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p41">"Fyodor Pavlovitch, for the last time, your compact, do you
						
						hear? Behave properly or I will pay you out!" Miusov had time to
						
						mutter again.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p42">"I can't think why you are so agitated," Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						observed sarcastically. "Are you uneasy about your sins? They say he
						
						can tell by one's eyes what one has come about. And what a lot you
						
						think of their opinion! you, a Parisian, and so advanced. I'm
						
						surprised at you."
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p43">But Miusov had no time to reply to this sarcasm. They were asked
						
						to come in. He walked in, somewhat irritated.
						
							</p><p id="i_4-p44">"Now, I know myself, I am annoyed, I shall lose my temper and
						
						begin to quarrel- and lower myself and my ideas," he reflected.</p>
				
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - The Old Buffoon" prev="i_4" next="iii_1" id="ii_2">
						 <p id="ii_2-p1">THEY entered the room almost at the same moment that the elder
						
						came in from his bedroom. There were already in the cell, awaiting the
						
						elder, two monks of the hermitage, one the Father Librarian, and the
						
						other Father Paissy, a very learned man, so they said, in delicate
						
						health, though not old. There was also a tall young man, who looked
						
						about two and twenty, standing in the corner throughout the interview.
						
						He had a broad, fresh face, and clever, observant, narrow brown
						
						eyes, and was wearing ordinary dress. He was a divinity student,
						
						living under the protection of the monastery. His expression was one
						
						of unquestioning, but self-respecting, reverence. Being in a
						
						subordinate and dependent position, and so not on an equality with the
						
						guests, he did not greet them with a bow.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p2">Father Zossima was accompanied by a novice, and by Alyosha. The
						
						two monks rose and greeted him with a very deep bow, touching the
						
						ground with their fingers; then kissed his hand. Blessing them, the
						
						elder replied with as deep a reverence to them, and asked their
						
						blessing. The whole ceremony was performed very seriously and with
						
						an appearance of feeling, not like an everyday rite. But Miusov
						
						fancied that it was all done with intentional impressiveness. He stood
						
						in front of the other visitors. He ought- he had reflected upon it the
						
						evening before- from simple politeness, since it was the custom
						
						here, to have gone up to receive the elder's blessing, even if he
						
						did not kiss his hand. But when he saw all this bowing and kissing
						
						on the part of the monks he instantly changed his mind. With dignified
						
						gravity he made a rather deep, conventional bow, and moved away to a
						
						chair. Fyodor Pavlovitch did the same, mimicking Miusov like an ape.
						
						Ivan bowed with great dignity and courtesy, but he too kept his
						
						hands at his sides, while Kalganov was so confused that he did not bow
						
						at all. The elder let fall the hand raised to bless them, and bowing
						
						to them again, asked them all to sit down. The blood rushed to
						
						Alyosha's cheeks. He was ashamed. His forebodings were coming true.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p3">Father Zossima sat down on a very old-fashioned mahogany sofa,
						
						covered with leather, and made his visitors sit down in a row along
						
						the opposite wall on four mahogany chairs, covered with shabby black
						
						leather. The monks sat, one at the door and the other at the window.
						
						The divinity student, the novice, and Alyosha remained standing. The
						
						cell was not very large and had a faded look. It contained nothing but
						
						the most necessary furniture, of coarse and poor quality. There were
						
						two pots of flowers in the window, and a number of holy pictures in
						
						the corner. Before one huge ancient ikon of the virgin a lamp was
						
						burning. Near it were two other holy pictures in shining settings,
						
						and, next them, carved cherubim, china eggs, a Catholic cross of
						
						ivory, with a Mater Dolorosa embracing it, and several foreign
						
						engravings from the great Italian artists of past centuries. Next to
						
						these costly and artistic engravings were several of the roughest
						
						Russian prints of saints and martyrs, such as are sold for a few
						
						farthings at all the fairs. On the other walls were portraits of
						
						Russian bishops, past and present.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p4">Miusov took a cursory glance at all these "conventional"
						
						surroundings and bent an intent look upon the elder. He had a high
						
						opinion of his own insight a weakness excusable in him as he was
						
						fifty, an age at which a clever man of the world of established
						
						position can hardly help taking himself rather seriously. At the first
						
						moment he did not like Zossima. There was, indeed, something in the
						
						elder's face which many people besides Miusov might not have liked. He
						
						was a short, bent, little man, with very weak legs, and though he
						
						was only sixty-five, he looked at least ten years older. His face
						
						was very thin and covered with a network of fine wrinkles,
						
						particularly numerous about his eyes, which were small,
						
						light-coloured, quick, and shining like two bright points. He had a
						
						sprinkling of grey hair about his temples. His pointed beard was small
						
						and scanty, and his lips, which smiled frequently, were as thin as two
						
						threads. His nose was not long, but sharp, like a bird's beak.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p5">"To all appearances a malicious soul, full of petty pride,"
						
						thought Miusov. He felt altogether dissatisfied with his position.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p6">A cheap little clock on the wall struck twelve hurriedly, and
						
						served to begin the conversation.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p7">"Precisely to our time," cried Fyodor Pavlovitch, "but no sign
						
						of my son, Dmitri. I apologise for him, sacred elder!" (Alyosha
						
						shuddered all over at "sacred elder".) "I am always punctual myself,
						
						minute for minute, remembering that punctuality is the courtesy of
						
						kings....
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p8">"But you are not a king, anyway," Miusov muttered, losing his
						
						self-restraint at once.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p9">"Yes; that's true. I'm not a king, and, would you believe it,
						
						Pyotr Alexandrovitch, I was aware of that myself. But, there! I always
						
						say the wrong thing. Your reverence," he cried, with sudden pathos,
						
						"you behold before you a buffoon in earnest! I introduce myself as
						
						such. It's an old habit, alas! And if I sometimes talk nonsense out of
						
						place it's with an object, with the object of amusing people and
						
						making myself agreeable. One must be agreeable, mustn't one? I was
						
						seven years ago in a little town where I had business, and I made
						
						friends with some merchants there. We went to the captain of police
						
						because we had to see him about something, and to ask him to dine with
						
						us. He was a tall, fat, fair, sulky man, the most dangerous type in
						
						such cases. It's their liver. I went straight up to him, and with
						
						the ease of a man of the world, you know, 'Mr. Ispravnik,' said I, 'be
						
						our Napravnik.' 'What do you mean by Napravnik?' said he. I saw, at
						
						the first half-second, that it had missed fire. He stood there so
						
						glum. 'I wanted to make a joke,' said I, 'for the general diversion,
						
						as Mr. Napravnik is our well-known Russian orchestra conductor and
						
						what we need for the harmony of our undertaking is someone of that
						
						sort.' And I explained my comparison very reasonably, didn't I?
						
						'Excuse me,' said he, 'I am an Ispravnik, and I do not allow puns to
						
						be made on my calling.' He turned and walked away. I followed him,
						
						shouting, 'Yes, yes, you are an Ispravnik, not a Napravnik.' 'No,'
						
						he said, 'since you called me a Napravnik I am one.' And would you
						
						believe it, it ruined our business! And I'm always like that, always
						
						like that. Always injuring myself with my politeness. Once, many years
						
						ago, I said to an influential person: 'Your wife is a ticklish
						
						lady,' in an honourable sense, of the moral qualities, so to speak.
						
						But he asked me, 'Why, have you tickled her?' I thought I'd be polite,
						
						so I couldn't help saying, 'Yes,' and he gave me a fine tickling on
						
						the spot. Only that happened long ago, so I'm not ashamed to tell
						
						the story. I'm always injuring myself like that."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p10">"You're doing it now," muttered Miusov, with disgust.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p11">Father Zossima scrutinised them both in silence.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p12">"Am I? Would you believe it, I was aware of that, too, Pyotr
						
						Alexandrovitch, and let tell you, indeed, I foresaw I should as soon
						
						as I began to speak. And do you know I foresaw, too, that you'd be the
						
						first to remark on it. The minute I see my joke isn't coming off, your
						
						reverence, both my cheeks feel as though they were drawn down to the
						
						lower jaw and there is almost a spasm in them. That's been so since
						
						I was young, when I had to make jokes for my living in noblemen's
						
						families. I am an inveterate buffoon, and have been from birth up,
						
						your reverence, it's as though it were a craze in me. I dare say
						
						it's a devil within me. But only a little one. A more serious one
						
						would have chosen another lodging. But not your soul, Pyotr
						
						Alexandrovitch; you're not a lodging worth having either. But I do
						
						believe- I believe in God, though I have had doubts of late. But now I
						
						sit and await words of wisdom. I'm like the philosopher, Diderot, your
						
						reverence. Did you ever hear, most Holy Father, how Diderot went to
						
						see the Metropolitan Platon, in the time of the Empress Catherine?
						
						He went in and said straight out, 'There is no God.' To which the
						
						great bishop lifted up his finger and answered, 'The fool has said
						
						in his heart there is no God and he fell down at his feet on the spot.
						
						'I believe,' he cried, 'and will be christened.' And so he was.
						
						Princess Dashkov was his godmother, and Potyomkin his godfather."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p13">"Fyodor Pavlovitch, this is unbearable! You know you're telling
						
						lies and that that stupid anecdote isn't true. Why are you playing the
						
						fool?" cried Miusov in a shaking voice.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p14">"I suspected all my life that it wasn't true," Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						cried with conviction. "But I'll tell you the whole truth,
						
						gentlemen. Great elder! Forgive me, the last thing about Diderot's
						
						christening I made up just now. I never thought of it before. I made
						
						it up to add piquancy. I play the fool, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, to
						
						make myself agreeable. Though I really don't know myself, sometimes,
						
						what I do it for. And as for Diderot, I heard as far as 'the fool hath
						
						said in his heart' twenty times from the gentry about here when I
						
						was young. I heard your aunt, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, tell the story.
						
						They all believe to this day that the infidel Diderot came to
						
						dispute about God with the Metropolitan Platon...."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p15">Miusov got up, forgetting himself in his impatience. He was
						
						furious, and conscious of being ridiculous.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p16">What was taking place in the cell was really incredible. For forty
						
						or fifty years past, from the times of former elders, no visitors
						
						had entered that cell without feelings of the profoundest
						
						veneration. Almost everyone admitted to the cell felt that a great
						
						favour was being shown him. Many remained kneeling during the whole
						
						visit. Of those visitors, many had been men of high rank and learning,
						
						some even free thinkers, attracted by curiosity, but all without
						
						exception had shown the profoundest reverence and delicacy, for here
						
						there was no question of money, but only, on the one side love and
						
						kindness, and on the other penitence and eager desire to decide some
						
						spiritual problem or crisis. So that such buffoonery amazed and
						
						bewildered the spectators, or at least some of them. The monks, with
						
						unchanged countenances, waited, with earnest attention, to hear what
						
						the elder would say, but seemed on the point of standing up, like
						
						Miusov. Alyosha stood, with hanging head, on the verge of tears.
						
						What seemed to him strangest of all was that his brother Ivan, on whom
						
						alone he had rested his hopes, and who alone had such influence on his
						
						father that he could have stopped him, sat now quite unmoved, with
						
						downcast eyes, apparently waiting with interest to see how it would
						
						end, as though he had nothing to do with it. Alyosha did not dare to
						
						look at Rakitin, the divinity student, whom he knew almost intimately.
						
						He alone in the monastery knew Rakitin's thoughts.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p17">"Forgive me," began Miusov, addressing Father Zossima, "for
						
						perhaps I seem to be taking part in this shameful foolery. I made a
						
						mistake in believing that even a man like Fyodor Pavlovitch would
						
						understand what was due on a visit to so honoured a personage. I did
						
						not suppose I should have to apologise simply for having come with
						
						him...."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p18">Pyotr Alexandrovitch could say no more, and was about to leave the
						
						room, overwhelmed with confusion.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p19">"Don't distress yourself, I beg." The elder got on to his feeble
						
						legs, and taking Pyotr Alexandrovitch by both hands, made him sit down
						
						again. "I beg you not to disturb yourself. I particularly beg you to
						
						be my guest." And with a bow he went back and sat down again on his
						
						little sofa.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p20">"Great elder, speak! Do I annoy you by my vivacity?" Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch cried suddenly, clutching the arms of his chair in both
						
						hands, as though ready to leap up from it if the answer were
						
						unfavourable.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p21">"I earnestly beg you, too, not to disturb yourself, and not to
						
						be uneasy," the elder said impressively. "Do not trouble. Make
						
						yourself quite at home. And, above all, do not be so ashamed of
						
						yourself, for that is at the root of it all."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p22">"Quite at home? To be my natural self? Oh, that is much too
						
						much, but I accept it with grateful joy. Do you know, blessed
						
						father, you'd better not invite me to be my natural self. Don't risk
						
						it.... I will not go so far as that myself. I warn you for your own
						
						sake. Well, the rest is still plunged in the mists of uncertainty,
						
						though there are people who'd be pleased to describe me for you. I
						
						mean that for you, Pyotr Alexandrovitch. But as for you, holy being,
						
						let me tell you, I am brimming over with ecstasy."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p23">He got up, and throwing up his hands, declaimed, "Blessed be the
						
						womb that bare thee, and the paps that gave thee suck- the paps
						
						especially. When you said just now, 'Don't be so ashamed of
						
						yourself, for that is at the root of it all,' you pierced right
						
						through me by that remark, and read me to the core. Indeed, I always
						
						feel when I meet people that I am lower than all, and that they all
						
						take me for a buffoon. So I say, 'Let me really play the buffoon. I am
						
						not afraid of your opinion, for you are every one of you worse than
						
						I am.' That is why I am a buffoon. It is from shame, great elder, from
						
						shame; it's simply over-sensitiveness that makes me rowdy. If I had
						
						only been sure that everyone would accept me as the kindest and wisest
						
						of men, oh, Lord, what a good man I should have been then! Teacher!"
						
						he fell suddenly on his knees, "what must I do to gain eternal life?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p24">It was difficult even now to decide whether he was joking or
						
						really moved.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p25">Father Zossima, lifting his eyes, looked at him, and said with a
						
						smile:
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p26">"You have known for a long time what you must do. You have sense
						
						enough: don't give way to drunkenness and incontinence of speech;
						
						don't give way to sensual lust; and, above all, to the love of
						
						money. And close your taverns. If you can't close all, at least two or
						
						three. And, above all- don't lie."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p27">"You mean about Diderot?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p28">"No, not about Diderot. Above all, don't lie to yourself. The
						
						man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to such a
						
						pass that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him,
						
						and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no
						
						respect he ceases to love, and in order to occupy and distract himself
						
						without love he gives way to passions and coarse pleasures, and
						
						sinks to bestiality in his vices, all from continual lying to other
						
						men and to himself. The man who lies to himself can be more easily
						
						offended than anyone. You know it is sometimes very pleasant to take
						
						offence, isn't it? A man may know that nobody has insulted him, but
						
						that he has invented the insult for himself, has lied and
						
						exaggerated to make it picturesque, has caught at a word and made a
						
						mountain out of a molehill- he knows that himself, yet he will be
						
						the first to take offence, and will revel in his resentment till he
						
						feels great pleasure in it, and so pass to genuine vindictiveness. But
						
						get up, sit down, I beg you. All this, too, is deceitful
						
						posturing...."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p29">"Blessed man! Give me your hand to kiss."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p30">Fyodor Pavlovitch skipped up, and imprinted a rapid kiss on the
						
						elder's thin hand. "It is, it is pleasant to take offence. You said
						
						that so well, as I never heard it before. Yes, I have been all my life
						
						taking offence, to please myself, taking offence on aesthetic grounds,
						
						for it is not so much pleasant as distinguished sometimes to be
						
						insulted- that you had forgotten, great elder, it is distinguished!
						
						I shall make a note of that. But I have been lying, lying positively
						
						my whole life long, every day and hour of it. Of a truth, I am a
						
						lie, and the father of lies. Though I believe I am not the father of
						
						lies. I am getting mixed in my texts. Say, the son of lies, and that
						
						will be enough. Only... my angel... may sometimes talk about
						
						Diderot! Diderot will do no harm, though sometimes a word will do
						
						harm. Great elder, by the way, I was forgetting, though I had been
						
						meaning for the last two years to come here on purpose to ask and to
						
						find out something. Only do tell Pyotr Alexandrovitch not to interrupt
						
						me. Here is my question: Is it true, great Father, that the story is
						
						told somewhere in the Lives of the Saints of a holy saint martyred for
						
						his faith who, when his head was cut off at last, stood up, picked
						
						up his head, and, 'courteously kissing it,' walked a long way,
						
						carrying it in his hands. Is that true or not, honoured Father?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p31">"No, it is untrue," said the elder.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p32">"There is nothing of the kind in all the lives of the saints. What
						
						saint do you say the story is told of?" asked the Father Librarian.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p33">"I do not know what saint. I do not know, and can't tell. I was
						
						deceived. I was told the story. I had heard it, and do you know who
						
						told it? Pyotr Alexandrovitch Miusov here, was so angry just now about
						
						Diderot. He it was who told the story."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p34">"I have never told it you, I never speak to you at all."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p35">"It is true you did not tell me, but you told it when I was
						
						present. It was three years ago. I mentioned it because by that
						
						ridiculous story you shook my faith, Pyotr Alexandrovitch. You knew
						
						nothing of it, but I went home with my faith shaken, and I have been
						
						getting more and more shaken ever since. Yes, Pyotr Alexandrovitch,
						
						you were the cause of a great fall. That was not a Diderot!
						
							Fyodor Pavlovitch got excited and pathetic, though it was
						
						perfectly clear to everyone by now that he was playing a part again.
						
						Yet Miusov was stung by his words.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p36">"What nonsense, and it is all nonsense," he muttered. "I may
						
						really have told it, some time or other... but not to you. I was
						
						told it myself. I heard it in Paris from a Frenchman. He told me it
						
						was read at our mass from the Lives of the Saints... he was a very
						
						learned man who had made a special study of Russian statistics and had
						
						lived a long time in Russia.... I have not read the Lives of the
						
						Saints myself, and I am not going to read them... all sorts of
						
						things are said at dinner- we were dining then."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p37">"Yes, you were dining then, and so I lost my faith!" said Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, mimicking him.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p38">"What do I care for your faith?" Miusov was on the point of
						
						shouting, but he suddenly checked himself, and said with contempt,
						
						"You defile everything you touch."
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p39">The elder suddenly rose from his seat. "Excuse me, gentlemen,
						
						for leaving you a few minutes," he said, addressing all his guests. "I
						
						have visitors awaiting me who arrived before you. But don't you tell
						
						lies all the same," he added, turning to Fyodor Pavlovitch with a
						
						good-humoured face. He went out of the cell. Alyosha and the novice
						
						flew to escort him down the steps. Alyosha was breathless: he was glad
						
						to get away, but he was glad, too, that the elder was good-humoured
						
						and not offended. Father Zossima was going towards the portico to
						
						bless the people waiting for him there. But Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						persisted, in stopping him at the door of the cell.
						
							</p><p id="ii_2-p40">"Blessed man!" he cried, with feeling. "Allow me to kiss your hand
						
						once more. Yes, with you I could still talk, I could still get on.
						
						Do you think I always lie and play the fool like this? Believe me, I
						
						have been acting like this all the time on purpose to try you. I
						
						have been testing you all the time to see whether I could get on
						
						with you. Is there room for my humility beside your pride? I am
						
						ready to give you a testimonial that one can get on with you! But now,
						
						I'll be quiet; I will keep quiet all the time. I'll sit in a chair and
						
						hold my tongue. Now it is for you to speak, Pyotr Alexandrovitch.
						
						You are the principal person left now- for ten minutes."</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - Peasant Women Who Have Faith" prev="ii_2" next="iv_1" id="iii_1">
						<p id="iii_1-p1">NEAR the wooden portico below, built on to the outer wall of the
						
						precinct, there was a crowd of about twenty peasant women. They had
						
						been told that the elder was at last coming out, and they had gathered
						
						together in anticipation. Two ladies, Madame Hohlakov and her
						
						daughter, had also come out into the portico to wait for the elder,
						
						but in a separate part of it set aside for women of rank.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p2">Madame Hohlakov was a wealthy lady, still young and attractive,
						
						and always dressed with taste. She was rather pale, and had lively
						
						black eyes. She was not more than thirty-three, and had been five
						
						years a widow. Her daughter, a girl of fourteen, was partially
						
						paralysed. The poor child had not been able to walk for the last six
						
						months, and was wheeled about in a long reclining chair. She had a
						
						charming little face, rather thin from illness, but full of gaiety.
						
						There was a gleam of mischief in her big dark eyes with their long
						
						lashes. Her mother had been intending to take her abroad ever since
						
						the spring, but they had been detained all the summer by business
						
						connected with their estate. They had been staying a week in our town,
						
						where they had come more for purposes of business than devotion, but
						
						had visited Father Zossima once already, three days before. Though
						
						they knew that the elder scarcely saw anyone, they had now suddenly
						
						turned up again, and urgently entreated "the happiness of looking once
						
						again on the great healer."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p3">The mother was sitting on a chair by the side of her daughter's
						
						invalid carriage, and two paces from her stood an old monk, not one of
						
						our monastery, but a visitor from an obscure religious house in the
						
						far north. He too sought the elder's blessing.
						
							But Father Zossima, on entering the portico, went first straight
						
						to the peasants who were crowded at the foot of the three steps that
						
						led up into the portico. Father Zossima stood on the top step, put
						
						on his stole, and began blessing the women who thronged about him. One
						
						crazy woman was led up to him. As soon as she caught sight of the
						
						elder she began shrieking and writhing as though in the pains of
						
						childbirth. Laying the stole on her forehead, he read a short prayer
						
						over her, and she was at once soothed and quieted.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p4">I do not know how it may be now, but in my childhood I often
						
						happened to see and hear these "possessed" women in the villages and
						
						monasteries. They used to be brought to mass; they would squeal and
						
						bark like a dog so that they were heard all over the church. But
						
						when the sacrament was carried in and they were led up to it, at
						
						once the "possession" ceased, and the sick women were always soothed
						
						for a time. I was greatly impressed and amazed at this as a child; but
						
						then I heard from country neighbours and from my town teachers that
						
						the whole illness was simulated to avoid work, and that it could
						
						always be cured by suitable severity; various anecdotes were told to
						
						confirm this. But later on I learnt with astonishment from medical
						
						specialists that there is no pretence about it, that it is a
						
						terrible illness to which women are subject, especially prevalent
						
						among us in Russia, and that it is due to the hard lot of the
						
						peasant women. It is a disease, I was told, arising from exhausting
						
						toil too soon after hard, abnormal and unassisted labour in
						
						childbirth, and from the hopeless misery, from beatings, and so on,
						
						which some women were not able to endure like others. The strange
						
						and instant healing of the frantic and struggling woman as soon as she
						
						was led up to the holy sacrament, which had been explained to me as
						
						due to malingering and the trickery of the "clericals," arose probably
						
						in the most natural manner. Both the women who supported her and the
						
						invalid herself fully believed as a truth beyond question that the
						
						evil spirit in possession of her could not hold if the sick woman were
						
						brought to the sacrament and made to bow down before it. And so,
						
						with a nervous and psychically deranged woman, a sort of convulsion of
						
						the whole organism always took place, and was bound to take place,
						
						at the moment of bowing down to the sacrament, aroused by the
						
						expectation of the miracle of healing and the implicit belief that
						
						it would come to pass; and it did come to pass, though only for a
						
						moment. It was exactly the same now as soon as the elder touched the
						
						sick woman with the stole.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p5">Many of the women in the crowd were moved to tears of ecstasy by
						
						the effect of the moment: some strove to kiss the hem of his
						
						garment, others cried out in sing-song voices.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p6">He blessed them all and talked with some of them. The
						
						"possessed" woman he knew already. She came from a village only six
						
						versts from the monastery, and had been brought to him before.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p7">"But here is one from afar." He pointed to a woman by no means old
						
						but very thin and wasted, with a face not merely sunburnt but almost
						
						blackened by exposure. She was kneeling and gazing with a fixed
						
						stare at the elder; there was something almost frenzied in her eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p8">"From afar off, Father, from afar off! From two hundred miles from
						
						here. From afar off, Father, from afar off!" the woman began in a
						
						sing-song voice as though she were chanting a dirge, swaying her
						
						head from side to side with her cheek resting in her hand.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p9">There is silent and long-suffering sorrow to be met with among the
						
						peasantry. It withdraws into itself and is still. But there is a grief
						
						that breaks out, and from that minute it bursts into tears and finds
						
						vent in wailing. This is particularly common with women. But it is
						
						no lighter a grief than the silent. Lamentations comfort only by
						
						lacerating the heart still more. Such grief does not desire
						
						consolation. It feeds on the sense of its hopelessness. Lamentations
						
						spring only from the constant craving to re-open the wound.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p10">"You are of the tradesman class?" said Father Zossima, looking
						
						curiously at her.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p11">"Townfolk we are, Father, townfolk. Yet we are peasants though
						
						we live in the town. I have come to see you, O Father! We heard of
						
						you, Father, we heard of you. I have buried my little son, and I
						
						have come on a pilgrimage. I have been in three monasteries, but
						
						they told me, 'Go, Nastasya, go to them'- that is to you. I have come;
						
						I was yesterday at the service, and to-day I have come to you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p12">"What are you weeping for?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p13">"It's my little son I'm grieving for, Father. he was three years
						
						old- three years all but three months. For my little boy, Father,
						
						I'm in anguish, for my little boy. He was the last one left. We had
						
						four, my Nikita and I, and now we've no children, our dear ones have
						
						all gone I buried the first three without grieving overmuch, and now I
						
						have buried the last I can't forget him. He seems always standing
						
						before me. He never leaves me. He has withered my heart. I look at his
						
						little clothes, his little shirt, his little boots, and I wail. I
						
						lay out all that is left of him, all his little things. I look at them
						
						and wail. I say to Nikita, my husband, 'let me go on a pilgrimage,
						
						master.' He is a driver. We're not poor people, Father, not poor; he
						
						drives our own horse. It's all our own, the horse and the carriage.
						
						And what good is it all to us now? My Nikita has begun drinking
						
						while I am away. He's sure to. It used to be so before. As soon as I
						
						turn my back he gives way to it. But now I don't think about him. It's
						
						three months since I left home. I've forgotten him. I've forgotten
						
						everything. I don't want to remember. And what would our life be now
						
						together? I've done with him, I've done. I've done with them all. I
						
						don't care to look upon my house and my goods. I don't care to see
						
						anything at all!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p14">"Listen, mother," said the elder. "Once in olden times a holy
						
						saint saw in the Temple a mother like you weeping for her little
						
						one, her only one, whom God had taken. 'Knowest thou not,' said the
						
						saint to her, 'how bold these little ones are before the throne of
						
						God? Verily there are none bolder than they in the Kingdom of
						
						Heaven. "Thou didst give us life, O Lord," they say, "and scarcely had
						
						we looked upon it when Thou didst take it back again." And so boldly
						
						they ask and ask again that God gives them at once the rank of angels.
						
						Therefore,' said the saint, 'thou, too, O Mother, rejoice and weep
						
						not, for thy little son is with the Lord in the fellowship of the
						
						angels.' That's what the saint said to the weeping mother of old. He
						
						was a great saint and he could not have spoken falsely. Therefore
						
						you too, mother, know that your little one is surely before the throne
						
						of God, is rejoicing and happy, and praying to God for you, and
						
						therefore weep, but rejoice."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p15">The woman listened to him, looking down with her cheek in her
						
						hand. She sighed deeply.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p16">"My Nikita tried to comfort me with the same words as you.
						
						'Foolish one,' he said, 'why weep? Our son is no doubt singing with
						
						the angels before God.' He says that to me, but he weeps himself. I
						
						see that he cries like me. 'I know, Nikita,' said I. 'Where could he
						
						be if not with the Lord God? Only, here with us now he is not as he
						
						used to sit beside us before.' And if only I could look upon him one
						
						little time, if only I could peep at him one little time, without
						
						going up to him, without speaking, if I could be hidden in a corner
						
						and only see him for one little minute, hear him playing in the
						
						yard, calling in his little voice, 'Mammy, where are you?' If only I
						
						could hear him pattering with his little feet about the room just
						
						once, only once; for so often, so often I remember how he used to
						
						run to me and shout and laugh, if only I could hear his little feet
						
						I should know him! But he's gone, Father, he's gone, and I shall never
						
						hear him again. Here's his little sash, but him I shall never see or
						
						hear now."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p17">She drew out of her bosom her boy's little embroidered sash, and
						
						as soon as she looked at it she began shaking with sobs, hiding her
						
						eyes with her fingers through which the tears flowed in a sudden
						
						stream.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p18">"It is Rachel of old," said the elder, "weeping for her
						
						children, and will not be comforted because they are not. Such is
						
						the lot set on earth for you mothers. Be not comforted. Consolation is
						
						not what you need. Weep and be not consoled, but weep. Only every time
						
						that you weep be sure to remember that your little son is one of the
						
						angels of God, that he looks down from there at you and sees you,
						
						and rejoices at your tears, and points at them to the Lord God; and
						
						a long while yet will you keep that great mother's grief. But it
						
						will turn in the end into quiet joy, and your bitter tears will be
						
						only tears of tender sorrow that purifies the heart and delivers it
						
						from sin. And I shall pray for the peace of your child's soul. What
						
						was his name?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p19">"Alexey, Father."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p20">"A sweet name. After Alexey, the man of God?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p21">"Yes, Father."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p22">"What a saint he was! I will remember him, mother, and your
						
						grief in my prayers, and I will pray for your husband's health. It
						
						is a sin for you to leave him. Your little one will see from heaven
						
						that you have forsaken his father, and will weep over you. Why do
						
						you trouble his happiness? He is living, for the soul lives for
						
						ever, and though he is not in the house he is near you, unseen. How
						
						can he go into the house when you say that the house is hateful to
						
						you? To whom is he to go if he find you not together, his father and
						
						mother? He comes to you in dreams now, and you grieve. But then he
						
						will send you gentle dreams. Go to your husband, mother; go this
						
						very day."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p23">"I will go, Father, at your word. I will go. You've gone
						
						straight to my heart. My Nikita, my Nikita, you are waiting for me,"
						
						the woman began in a sing-song voice; but the elder had already turned
						
						away to a very old woman, dressed like a dweller in the town, not like
						
						a pilgrim. Her eyes showed that she had come with an object, and in
						
						order to say something. She said she was the widow of a
						
						non-commissioned officer, and lived close by in the town. Her son
						
						Vasenka was in the commissariat service, and had gone to Irkutsk in
						
						Siberia. He had written twice from there, but now a year had passed
						
						since he had written. She did inquire about him, but she did not
						
						know the proper place to inquire.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p24">"Only the other day Stepanida Ilyinishna- she's a rich
						
						merchant's wife- said to me, 'You go, Prohorovna, and put your son's
						
						name down for prayer in the church, and pray for the peace of his soul
						
						as though he were dead. His soul will be troubled,' she said, 'and
						
						he will write you a letter.' And Stepanida Ilyinishna told me it was a
						
						certain thing which had been many times tried. Only I am in
						
						doubt.... Oh, you light of ours! is it true or false, and would it
						
						be right?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p25">"Don't think of it. It's shameful to ask the question. How is it
						
						possible to pray for the peace of a living soul? And his own mother
						
						too! It's a great sin, akin to sorcery. Only for your ignorance it
						
						is forgiven you. Better pray to the Queen of Heaven, our swift defence
						
						and help, for his good health, and that she may forgive you for your
						
						error. And another thing I will tell you, Prohorovna. Either he will
						
						soon come back to you, your son, or he will be sure to send a
						
						letter. Go, and henceforward be in peace. Your son is alive, I tell
						
						you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p26">"Dear Father, God reward you, our benefactor, who prays for all of
						
						us and for our sins!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p27">But the elder had already noticed in the crowd two glowing eyes
						
						fixed upon him. An exhausted, consumptive-looking, though young
						
						peasant woman was gazing at him in silence. Her eyes besought him, but
						
						she seemed afraid to approach.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p28">"What is it, my child?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p29">"Absolve my soul, Father," she articulated softly, and slowly sank
						
						on her knees and bowed down at his feet. "I have sinned, Father. I
						
						am afraid of my sin."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p30">The elder sat down on the lower step. The woman crept closer to
						
						him, still on her knees.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p31">"I am a widow these three years," she began in a half-whisper,
						
						with a sort of shudder. "I had a hard life with my husband. He was
						
						an old man. He used to beat me cruelly. He lay ill; I thought
						
						looking at him, if he were to get well, if he were to get up again,
						
						what then? And then the thought came to me-"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p32">"Stay!" said the elder, and he put his ear close to her lips.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p33">The woman went on in a low whisper, so that it was almost
						
						impossible to catch anything. She had soon done.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p34">"Three years ago?" asked the elder.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p35">"Three years. At first I didn't think about it, but now I've begun
						
						to be ill, and the thought never leaves me."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p36">"Have you come from far?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p37">"Over three hundred miles away."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p38">"Have you told it in confession?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p39">"I have confessed it. Twice I have confessed it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p40">"Have you been admitted to Communion?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p41">"Yes. I am afraid. I am afraid to die."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p42">"Fear nothing and never be afraid; and don't fret. If only your
						
						penitence fail not, God will forgive all. There is no sin, and there
						
						can be no sin on all the earth, which the Lord will not forgive to the
						
						truly repentant! Man cannot commit a sin so great as to exhaust the
						
						infinite love of God. Can there be a sin which could exceed the love
						
						of God? Think only of repentance, continual repentance, but dismiss
						
						fear altogether. Believe that God loves you as you cannot conceive;
						
						that He loves you with your sin, in your sin. It has been said of
						
						old that over one repentant sinner there is more joy in heaven than
						
						over ten righteous men. Go, and fear not. Be not bitter against men.
						
						Be not angry if you are wronged. Forgive the dead man in your heart
						
						what wrong he did you. Be reconciled with him in truth. If you are
						
						penitent, you love. And if you love you are of God. All things are
						
						atoned for, all things are saved by love. If I, a sinner, even as
						
						you are, am tender with you and have pity on you, how much more will
						
						God. Love is such a priceless treasure that you can redeem the whole
						
						world by it, and expiate not only your own sins but the sins of
						
						others."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p43">He signed her three times with the cross, took from his own neck a
						
						little ikon and put it upon her. She bowed down to the earth without
						
						speaking.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p44">He got up and looked cheerfully at a healthy peasant woman with
						
						a tiny baby in her arms.
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p45">"From Vyshegorye, dear Father."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p46">"Five miles you have dragged yourself with the baby. What do you
						
						want?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p47">"I've come to look at you. I have been to you before- or have
						
						you forgotten? You've no great memory if you've forgotten me. They
						
						told us you were ill. Thinks I, I'll go and see him for myself. Now
						
						I see you, and you're not ill! You'll live another twenty years. God
						
						bless you! There are plenty to pray for you; how should you be ill?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p48">"I thank you for all, daughter."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p49">"By the way, I have a thing to ask, not a great one. Here are
						
						sixty copecks. Give them, dear Father, to someone poorer than me. I
						
						thought as I came along, better give through him. He'll know whom to
						
						give to."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p50">"Thanks, my dear, thanks! You are a good woman. I love you. I will
						
						do so certainly. Is that your little girl?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p51">"My little girl, Father, Lizaveta."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p52">"May the Lord bless you both, you and your babe Lizaveta! You have
						
						gladdened my heart, mother. Farewell, dear children, farewell, dear
						
						ones."
						
							</p><p id="iii_1-p53">He blessed them all and bowed low to them.</p>				
											
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - A Lady of Little Faith" prev="iii_1" next="v_1" id="iv_1">
					
					
					
						<p id="iv_1-p1">A visitor looking on the scene of his conversation with the
						
						peasants and his blessing them shed silent tears and wiped them away
						
						with her handkerchief. She was a sentimental society lady of genuinely
						
						good disposition in many respects. When the elder went up to her at
						
						last she met him enthusiastically.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p2">"Ah, what I have been feeling, looking on at this touching
						
						scene!... "She could not go on for emotion. "Oh, I understand the
						
						people's love for you. I love the people myself. I want to love
						
						them. And who could help loving them, our splendid Russian people,
						
						so simple in their greatness!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p3">"How is your daughter's health? You wanted to talk to me again?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p4">"Oh, I have been urgently begging for it, I have prayed for it!
						
						I was ready to fall on my knees and kneel for three days at your
						
						windows until you let me in. We have come, great healer, to express
						
						our ardent gratitude. You have healed my Lise, healed her
						
						completely, merely by praying over her last Thursday and laying your
						
						hands upon her. We have hastened here to kiss those hands, to pour out
						
						our feelings and our homage."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p5">"What do you mean by healed? But she is still lying down in her
						
						chair."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p6">"But her night fevers have entirely ceased ever since Thursday,"
						
						said the lady with nervous haste. "And that's not all. Her legs are
						
						stronger. This mourning she got up well; she had slept all night. Look
						
						at her rosy cheeks, her bright eyes! She used to be always crying, but
						
						now she laughs and is gay and happy. This morning she insisted on my
						
						letting her stand up, and she stood up for a whole minute without
						
						any support. She wagers that in a fortnight she'll be dancing a
						
						quadrille. I've called in Doctor Herzenstube. He shrugged his
						
						shoulders and said, 'I am amazed; I can make nothing of it.' And would
						
						you have us not come here to disturb you, not fly here to thank you?
						
						Lise, thank him- thank him!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p7">Lise's pretty little laughing face became suddenly serious. She
						
						rose in her chair as far as she could and, looking at the elder,
						
						clasped her hands before him, but could not restrain herself and broke
						
						into laughter.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p8">"It's at him," she said, pointing to Alyosha, with childish
						
						vexation at herself for not being able to repress her mirth.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p9">If anyone had looked at Alyosha standing a step behind the
						
						elder, he would have caught a quick flush crimsoning his cheeks in
						
						an instant. His eyes shone and he looked down.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p10">"She has a message for you, Alexey Fyodorovitch. How are you?" the
						
						mother went on, holding out her exquisitely gloved hand to Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p11">The elder turned round and all at once looked attentively at
						
						Alyosha. The latter went nearer to Lise and, smiling in a strangely
						
						awkward way, held out his hand to her too. Lise assumed an important
						
						air.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p12">"Katerina Ivanovna has sent you this through me." She handed him a
						
						little note. "She particularly begs you to go and see her as soon as
						
						possible; that you will not fail her, but will be sure to come."
						
							"She asks me to go and see her? Me? What for?" Alyosha muttered in
						
						great astonishment. His face at once looked anxious.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p13">"Oh, it's all to do with Dmitri Fyodorovitch and- what has
						
						happened lately," the mother explained hurriedly. "Katerina Ivanovna
						
						has made up her mind, but she must see you about it.... Why, of
						
						course, I can't say. But she wants to see you at once. And you will go
						
						to her, of course. It is a Christian duty."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p14">"I have only seen her once," Alyosha protested with the same
						
						perplexity.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p15">"Oh, she is such a lofty, incomparable creature If only for her
						
						suffering.... Think what she has gone through, what she is enduring
						
						now Think what awaits her! It's all terrible, terrible!
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p16">"Very well, I will come," Alyosha decided, after rapidly
						
						scanning the brief, enigmatic note, which consisted of an urgent
						
						entreaty that he would come, without any sort of explanation.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p17">"Oh, how sweet and generous that would be of you" cried Lise
						
						with sudden animation. "I told mamma you'd be sure not to go. I said
						
						you were saving your soul. How splendid you are I've always thought
						
						you were splendid. How glad I am to tell you so!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p18">"Lise!" said her mother impressively, though she smiled after
						
						she had said it.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p19">"You have quite forgotten us, Alexey Fyodorovitch," she said; "you
						
						never come to see us. Yet Lise has told me twice that she is never
						
						happy except with you."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p20">Alyosha raised his downcast eyes and again flushed, and again
						
						smiled without knowing why. But the elder was no longer watching
						
						him. He had begun talking to a monk who, as mentioned before, had been
						
						awaiting his entrance by Lise's chair. He was evidently a monk of
						
						the humblest, that is of the peasant, class, of a narrow outlook,
						
						but a true believer, and, in his own way, a stubborn one. He announced
						
						that he had come from the far north, from Obdorsk, from Saint
						
						Sylvester, and was a member of a poor monastery, consisting of only
						
						ten monks. The elder gave him his blessing and invited him to come
						
						to his cell whenever he liked.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p21">"How can you presume to do such deeds?" the monk asked suddenly,
						
						pointing solemnly and significantly at Lise. He was referring to her
						
						"healing."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p22">"It's too early, of course, to speak of that. Relief is not
						
						complete cure, and may proceed from different causes. But if there has
						
						been any healing, it is by no power but God's will. It's all from God.
						
						Visit me, Father," he added to the monk. "It's not often I can see
						
						visitors. I am ill, and I know that my days are numbered."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p23">"Oh, no, no! God will not take you from us. You will live a
						
						long, long time yet," cried the lady. "And in what way are you ill?
						
						You look so well, so gay and happy."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p24">"I am extraordinarily better to-day. But I know that it's only for
						
						a moment. I understand my disease now thoroughly. If I seem so happy
						
						to you, you could never say anything that would please me so much. For
						
						men are made for happiness, and anyone who is completely happy has a
						
						right to say to himself, 'I am doing God's will on earth.' All the
						
						righteous, all the saints, all the holy martyrs were happy."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p25">"Oh, how you speak! What bold and lofty words" cried the lady.
						
						"You seem to pierce with your words. And yet- happiness, happiness-
						
						where is it? Who can say of himself that he is happy? Oh, since you
						
						have been so good as to let us see you once more to-day, let me tell
						
						you what I could not utter last time, what I dared not say, all I am
						
						suffering and have been for so long! I am suffering! Forgive me! I
						
						am suffering!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p26">And in a rush of fervent feeling she clasped her hands before him.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p27">"From what specially?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p28">"I suffer... from lack of faith."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p29">"Lack of faith in God?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p30">"Oh, no, no! I dare not even think of that. But the future life-
						
						it is such an enigma And no one, no one can solve it. Listen! You
						
						are a healer, you are deeply versed in the human soul, and of course I
						
						dare not expect you to believe me entirely, but I assure you on my
						
						word of honour that I am not speaking lightly now. The thought of
						
						the life beyond the grave distracts me to anguish, to terror. And I
						
						don't know to whom to appeal, and have not dared to all my life. And
						
						now I am so bold as to ask you. Oh, God! What will you think of me
						
						now?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p31">She clasped her hands.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p32">"Don't distress yourself about my opinion of you," said the elder.
						
						"I quite believe in the sincerity of your suffering."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p33">"Oh, how thankful I am to you! You see, I shut my eyes and ask
						
						myself if everyone has faith, where did it come from? And then they do
						
						say that it all comes from terror at the menacing phenomena of nature,
						
						and that none of it's real. And I say to myself, 'What if I've been
						
						believing all my life, and when I come to die there's nothing but
						
						the burdocks growing on my grave?' as I read in some author. It's
						
						awful! How- how can I get back my faith? But I only believed when I
						
						was a little child, mechanically, without thinking of anything. How,
						
						how is one to prove it? have come now to lay my soul before you and to
						
						ask you about it. If I let this chance slip, no one all my life will
						
						answer me. How can I prove it? How can I convince myself? Oh, how
						
						unhappy I am! I stand and look about me and see that scarcely anyone
						
						else cares; no one troubles his head about it, and I'm the only one
						
						who can't stand it. It's deadly- deadly!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p34">"No doubt. But there's no proving it, though you can be
						
						convinced of it."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p35">"By the experience of active love. Strive to love your neighbour
						
						actively and indefatigably. In as far as you advance in love you
						
						will grow surer of the reality of God and of the immortality of your
						
						soul. If you attain to perfect self-forgetfulness in the love of
						
						your neighbour, then you will believe without doubt, and no doubt
						
						can possibly enter your soul. This has been tried. This is certain."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p36">"In active love? There's another question and such a question! You
						
						see, I so love humanity that- would you believe it?- I often dream
						
						of forsaking all that I have, leaving Lise, and becoming a sister of
						
						mercy. I close my eyes and think and dream, and at that moment I
						
						feel full of strength to overcome all obstacles. No wounds, no
						
						festering sores could at that moment frighten me. I would bind them up
						
						and wash them with my own hands. I would nurse the afflicted. I
						
						would be ready to kiss such wounds."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p37">"It is much, and well that your mind is full of such dreams and
						
						not others. Some time, unawares, you may do a good deed in reality."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p38">"Yes. But could I endure such a life for long?" the lady went on
						
						fervently, almost frantically. "That's the chief question- that's my
						
						most agonising question. I shut my eyes and ask myself, 'Would you
						
						persevere long on that path? And if the patient whose wounds you are
						
						washing did not meet you with gratitude, but worried you with his
						
						whims, without valuing or remarking your charitable services, began
						
						abusing you and rudely commanding you, and complaining to the superior
						
						authorities of you (which often happens when people are in great
						
						suffering)- what then? Would you persevere in your love, or not?'
						
						And do you know, I came with horror to the conclusion that, if
						
						anything could dissipate my love to humanity, it would be ingratitude.
						
						In short, I am a hired servant, I expect my payment at once- that
						
						is, praise, and the repayment of love with love. Otherwise I am
						
						incapable of loving anyone.'"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p39">She was in a very paroxysm of self-castigation, and, concluding,
						
						she looked with defiant resolution at the elder.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p40">"It's just the same story as a doctor once told me," observed
						
						the elder. "He was a man getting on in years, and undoubtedly
						
						clever. He spoke as frankly as you, though in jest, in bitter jest. 'I
						
						love humanity,' he said, 'but I wonder at myself. The more I love
						
						humanity in general, the less I love man in particular. In my dreams,'
						
						he said, 'I have often come to making enthusiastic schemes for the
						
						service of humanity, and perhaps I might actually have faced
						
						crucifixion if it had been suddenly necessary; and yet I am
						
						incapable of living in the same room with anyone for two days
						
						together, as I know by experience. As soon as anyone is near me, his
						
						personality disturbs my self-complacency and restricts my freedom.
						
						In twenty-four hours I begin to hate the best of men: one because he's
						
						too long over his dinner; another because he has a cold and keeps on
						
						blowing his nose. I become hostile to people the moment they come
						
						close to me. But it has always happened that the more I detest men
						
						individually the more ardent becomes my love for humanity.'
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p41">"But what's to be done? What can one do in such a case? Must one
						
						despair?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p42">"No. It is enough that you are distressed at it. Do what you
						
						can, and it will be reckoned unto you. Much is done already in you
						
						since you can so deeply and sincerely know yourself. If you have
						
						been talking to me so sincerely, simply to gain approbation for your
						
						frankness, as you did from me just now, then, of course, you will
						
						not attain to anything in the achievement of real love; it will all
						
						get no further than dreams, and your whole life will slip away like
						
						a phantom. In that case you will naturally cease to think of the
						
						future life too, and will of yourself grow calmer after a fashion in
						
						the end."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p43">"You have crushed me! Only now, as you speak, I understand that
						
						I was really only seeking your approbation for my sincerity when I
						
						told you I could not endure ingratitude. You have revealed me to
						
						myself. You have seen through me and explained me to myself
						
							"Are you speaking the truth? Well, now, after such a confession, I
						
						believe that you are sincere and good at heart. If you do not attain
						
						happiness, always remember that you are on the right road, and try not
						
						to leave it. Above all, avoid falsehood, every kind of falsehood,
						
						especially falseness to yourself. Watch over your own deceitfulness
						
						and look into it every hour, every minute. Avoid being scornful,
						
						both to others and to yourself. What seems to you bad within you
						
						will grow purer from the very fact of your observing it in yourself.
						
						Avoid fear, too, though fear is only the consequence of every sort
						
						of falsehood. Never be frightened at your own faint-heartedness in
						
						attaining love. Don't be frightened overmuch even at your evil
						
						actions. I am sorry I can say nothing more consoling to you, for
						
						love in action is a harsh and dreadful thing compared with love in
						
						dreams. Love in dreams is greedy for immediate action, rapidly
						
						performed and in the sight of all. Men will even give their lives if
						
						only the ordeal does not last long but is soon over, with all
						
						looking on and applauding as though on the stage. But active love is
						
						labour and fortitude, and for some people too, perhaps, a complete
						
						science. But I predict that just when you see with horror that in
						
						spite of all your efforts you are getting farther from your goal
						
						instead of nearer to it- at that very moment I predict that you will
						
						reach it and behold clearly the miraculous power of the Lord who has
						
						been all the time loving and mysteriously guiding you. Forgive me
						
						for not being able to stay longer with you. They are waiting for me.
						
						Good-bye."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p44">The lady was weeping.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p45">"Lise, Lise! Bless her- bless her!" she cried, starting up
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p46">"She does not deserve to be loved. I have seen her naughtiness all
						
						along," the elder said jestingly. "Why have you been laughing at
						
						Alexey?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p47">Lise had in fact been occupied in mocking at him all the time. She
						
						had noticed before that Alyosha was shy and tried not to look at
						
						her, and she found this extremely amusing. She waited intently to
						
						catch his eye. Alyosha, unable to endure her persistent stare, was
						
						irresistibly and suddenly drawn to glance at her, and at once she
						
						smiled triumphantly in his face. Alyosha was even more disconcerted
						
						and vexed. At last he turned away from her altogether and hid behind
						
						the elder's back. After a few minutes, drawn by the same
						
						irresistible force, he turned again to see whether he was being looked
						
						at or not, and found Lise almost hanging out of her chair to peep
						
						sideways at him, eagerly waiting for him to look. Catching his eye,
						
						she laughed so that the elder could not help saying, "Why do you
						
						make fun of him like that, naughty girl?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p48">Lise suddenly and quite unexpectedly blushed. Her eyes flashed and
						
						her face became quite serious. She began speaking quickly and
						
						nervously in a warm and resentful voice:
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p49">"Why has he forgotten everything, then? He used to carry me
						
						about when I was little. We used to play together. He used to come
						
						to teach me to read, do you know. Two years ago, when he went away, he
						
						said that he would never forget me, that we were friends for ever, for
						
						ever, for ever! And now he's afraid of me all at once. Am I going to
						
						eat him? Why doesn't he want to come near me? Why doesn't he talk? Why
						
						won't he come and see us? It's not that you won't let him. We know
						
						that he goes everywhere. It's not good manners for me to invite him.
						
						He ought to have thought of it first, if he hasn't forgotten me. No,
						
						now he's saving his soul! Why have you put that long gown on him? If
						
						he runs he'll fall."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p50">And suddenly she hid her face in her hand and went off into
						
						irresistible, prolonged, nervous, inaudible laughter. The elder
						
						listened to her with a smile, and blessed her tenderly. As she
						
						kissed his hand she suddenly pressed it to her eyes and began crying.
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p51">"Don't be angry with me. I'm silly and good for nothing... and
						
						perhaps Alyosha's right, quite right, in not wanting to come and see
						
						such a ridiculous girl."
						
							</p><p id="iv_1-p52">"I will certainly send him," said the elder.</p>					
											
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - So Be It! So Be It!" prev="iv_1" next="vi" id="v_1">
					
						<p id="v_1-p1">THE elder's absence from his cell had lasted for about twenty-five
						
						minutes. It was more than half-past twelve, but Dmitri, on whose
						
						account they had all met there, had still not appeared. But he
						
						seemed almost to be forgotten, and when the elder entered the cell
						
						again, he found his guests engaged in eager conversation. Ivan and the
						
						two monks took the leading share in it. Miusov, too, was trying to
						
						take a part, and apparently very eagerly, in the conversation. But
						
						he was unsuccessful in this also. He was evidently in the
						
						background, and his remarks were treated with neglect, which increased
						
						his irritability. He had had intellectual encounters with Ivan
						
						before and he could not endure a certain carelessness Ivan showed him.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p2">"Hitherto at least I have stood in the front ranks of all that
						
						is progressive in Europe, and here the new generation positively
						
						ignores us," he thought.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p3">Fyodor Pavlovitch, who had given his word to sit still and be
						
						quiet, had actually been quiet for some time, but he watched his
						
						neighbour Miusov with an ironical little smile, obviously enjoying his
						
						discomfiture. He had been waiting for some time to pay off old scores,
						
						and now he could not let the opportunity slip. Bending over his
						
						shoulder he began teasing him again in a whisper.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p4">"Why didn't you go away just now, after the 'courteously kissing'?
						
						Why did you consent to remain in such unseemly company? It was because
						
						you felt insulted and aggrieved, and you remained to vindicate
						
						yourself by showing off your intelligence. Now you won't go till
						
						you've displayed your intellect to them."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p5">"You again?... On the contrary, I'm just going."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p6">"You'll be the last, the last of all to go!" Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						delivered him another thrust, almost at the moment of Father Zossima's
						
						return.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p7">The discussion died down for a moment, but the elder, seating
						
						himself in his former place, looked at them all as though cordially
						
						inviting them to go on. Alyosha, who knew every expression of his
						
						face, saw that he was fearfully exhausted and making a great effort.
						
						Of late he had been liable to fainting fits from exhaustion. His
						
						face had the pallor that was common before such attacks, and his
						
						lips were white. But he evidently did not want to break up the
						
						party. He seemed to have some special object of his own in keeping
						
						them. What object? Alyosha watched him intently.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p8">"We are discussing this gentleman's most interesting article,"
						
						said Father Iosif, the librarian, addressing the elder, and indicating
						
						Ivan. "He brings forward much that is new, but I think the argument
						
						cuts both ways. It is an article written in answer to a book by an
						
						ecclesiastical authority on the question of the ecclesiastical
						
						court, and the scope of its jurisdiction."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p9">"I'm sorry I have not read your article, but I've heard of it,"
						
						said the elder, looking keenly and intently at Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p10">"He takes up a most interesting position," continued the Father
						
						Librarian. "As far as Church jurisdiction is concerned he is
						
						apparently quite opposed to the separation of Church from State."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p11">"That's interesting. But in what sense?" Father Zossima asked
						
						Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p12">The latter, at last, answered him, not condescendingly, as Alyosha
						
						had feared, but with modesty and reserve, with evident goodwill and
						
						apparently without the slightest arrierepensee
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p13">"I start from the position that this confusion of elements, that
						
						is, of the essential principles of Church and State, will, of
						
						course, go on for ever, in spite of the fact that it is impossible for
						
						them to mingle, and that the confusion of these elements cannot lead
						
						to any consistent or even normal results, for there is falsity at
						
						the very foundation of it. Compromise between the Church and State
						
						in such questions as, for instance, jurisdiction, is, to my
						
						thinking, impossible in any real sense. My clerical opponent maintains
						
						that the Church holds a precise and defined position in the State. I
						
						maintain, on the contrary, that the Church ought to include the
						
						whole State, and not simply to occupy a corner in it, and, if this is,
						
						for some reason, impossible at present, then it ought, in reality,
						
						to be set up as the direct and chief aim of the future development
						
						of Christian society!"
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p14">"Perfectly true," Father Paissy, the silent and learned monk,
						
						assented with fervour and decision.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p15">"The purest Ultramontanism!" cried Miusov impatiently, crossing
						
						and recrossing his legs.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p16">"Oh, well, we have no mountains," cried Father Iosif, and
						
						turning to the elder he continued: "Observe the answer he makes to the
						
						following 'fundamental and essential' propositions of his opponent,
						
						who is, you must note, an ecclesiastic. First, that 'no social
						
						organisation can or ought to arrogate to itself power to dispose of
						
						the civic and political rights of its members.' Secondly, that
						
						'criminal and civil jurisdiction ought not to belong to the Church,
						
						and is inconsistent with its nature, both as a divine institution
						
						and as an organisation of men for religious objects,' and, finally, in
						
						the third place, 'the Church is a kingdom not of this world.'
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p17">"A most unworthy play upon words for an ecclesiastic!" Father
						
						Paissy could not refrain from breaking in again. "I have read the book
						
						which you have answered," he added, addressing Ivan, "and was
						
						astounded at the words 'The Church is a kingdom not of this world. 'If
						
						it is not of this world, then it cannot exist on earth at all. In
						
						the Gospel, the words 'not of this world' are not used in that
						
						sense. To play with such words is indefensible. Our Lord Jesus
						
						Christ came to set up the Church upon earth. The Kingdom of Heaven, of
						
						course, is not of this world, but in Heaven; but it is only entered
						
						through the Church which has been founded and established upon
						
						earth. And so a frivolous play upon words in such a connection is
						
						unpardonable and improper. The Church is, in truth, a kingdom and
						
						ordained to rule, and in the end must undoubtedly become the kingdom
						
						ruling over all the earth. For that we have the divine promise."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p18">He ceased speaking suddenly, as though checking himself. After
						
						listening attentively and respectfully Ivan went on, addressing the
						
						elder with perfect composure and as before with ready cordiality:
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p19">"The whole point of my article lies in the fact that during the
						
						first three centuries Christianity only existed on earth in the Church
						
						and was nothing but the Church. When the pagan Roman Empire desired to
						
						become Christian, it inevitably happened that, by becoming
						
						Christian, it included the Church but remained a pagan State in very
						
						many of its departments. In reality this was bound to happen. But Rome
						
						as a State retained too much of the pagan civilisation and culture,
						
						as, for example, in the very objects and fundamental principles of the
						
						State. The Christian Church entering into the State could, of
						
						course, surrender no part of its fundamental principles- the rock on
						
						which it stands- and could pursue no other aims than those which
						
						have been ordained and revealed by God Himself, and among them that of
						
						drawing the whole world, and therefore the ancient pagan State itself,
						
						into the Church. In that way (that is, with a view to the future) it
						
						is not the Church that should seek a definite position in the State,
						
						like 'every social organisation,' or as 'an organisation of men for
						
						religious purposes' (as my opponent calls the Church), but, on the
						
						contrary, every earthly State should be, in the end, completely
						
						transformed into the Church and should become nothing else but a
						
						Church, rejecting every purpose incongruous with the aims of the
						
						Church. All this will not degrade it in any way or take from its
						
						honour and glory as a great State, nor from the glory of its rulers,
						
						but only turns it from a false, still pagan, and mistaken path to
						
						the true and rightful path, which alone leads to the eternal goal.
						
						This is why the author of the book On the Foundations of Church
						
						Jurisdiction would have judged correctly if, in seeking and laying
						
						down those foundations, he bad looked upon them as a temporary
						
						compromise inevitable in our sinful and imperfect days. But as soon as
						
						the author ventures to declare that the foundations which he
						
						predicates now, part of which Father Iosif just enumerated, are the
						
						permanent, essential, and eternal foundations, he is going directly
						
						against the Church and its sacred and eternal vocation. That is the
						
						gist of my article."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p20">"That is, in brief," Father Paissy began again, laying stress on
						
						each word, "according to certain theories only too clearly
						
						formulated in the nineteenth century, the Church ought to be
						
						transformed into the State, as though this would be an advance from
						
						a lower to a higher form, so as to disappear into it, making way for
						
						science, for the spirit of the age, and civilisation. And if the
						
						Church resists and is unwilling, some corner will be set apart for her
						
						in the State, and even that under control and this will be so
						
						everywhere in all modern European countries. But Russian hopes and
						
						conceptions demand not that the Church should pass as from a lower
						
						into a higher type into the State, but, on the contrary, that the
						
						State should end by being worthy to become only the Church and nothing
						
						else. So be it! So be it!"
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p21">"Well, I confess you've reassured me somewhat," Miusov said
						
						smiling, again crossing his legs. "So far as I understand, then, the
						
						realisation of such an ideal is infinitely remote, at the second
						
						coming of Christ. That's as you please. It's a beautiful Utopian dream
						
						of the abolition of war, diplomacy, banks, and so on- something
						
						after the fashion of socialism, indeed. But I imagined that it was all
						
						meant seriously, and that the Church might be now going to try
						
						criminals, and sentence them to beating, prison, and even death."
						
							"But if there were none but the ecclesiastical court, the Church
						
						would not even now sentence a criminal to prison or to death. Crime
						
						and the way of regarding it would inevitably change, not all at once
						
						of course, but fairly soon," Ivan replied calmly, without flinching.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p22">"Are you serious?" Miusov glanced keenly at him.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p23">"If everything became the Church, the Church would exclude all the
						
						criminal and disobedient, and would not cut off their heads," Ivan
						
						went on. "I ask you, what would become of the excluded? He would be
						
						cut off then not only from men, as now, but from Christ. By his
						
						crime he would have transgressed not only against men but against
						
						the Church of Christ. This is so even now, of course, strictly
						
						speaking, but it is not clearly enunciated, and very, very often the
						
						criminal of to-day compromises with his conscience: 'I steal,' he
						
						says, 'but I don't go against the Church. I'm not an enemy of Christ.'
						
						That's what the criminal of to-day is continually saying to himself,
						
						but when the Church takes the place of the State it will be
						
						difficult for him, in opposition to the Church all over the world,
						
						to say: 'All men are mistaken, all in error, all mankind are the false
						
						Church. I, a thief and murderer, am the only true Christian Church.'
						
						It will be very difficult to say this to himself; it requires a rare
						
						combination of unusual circumstances. Now, on the other side, take the
						
						Church's own view of crime: is it not bound to renounce the present
						
						almost pagan attitude, and to change from a mechanical cutting off
						
						of its tainted member for the preservation of society, as at
						
						present, into completely and honestly adopting the idea of the
						
						regeneration of the man, of his reformation and salvation?"
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p24">"What do you mean? I fail to understand again," Miusov
						
						interrupted. "Some sort of dream again. Something shapeless and even
						
						incomprehensible. What is excommunication? What sort of exclusion? I
						
						suspect you are simply amusing yourself, Ivan Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p25">"Yes, but you know, in reality it is so now," said the elder
						
						suddenly, and all turned to him at once. "If it were not for the
						
						Church of Christ there would be nothing to restrain the criminal
						
						from evil-doing, no real chastisement for it afterwards; none, that
						
						is, but the mechanical punishment spoken of just now, which in the
						
						majority of cases only embitters the heart; and not the real
						
						punishment, the only effectual one, the only deterrent and softening
						
						one, which lies in the recognition of sin by conscience."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p26">"How is that, may one inquire?" asked Miusov, with lively
						
						curiosity.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p27">"Why," began the elder, "all these sentences to exile with hard
						
						labour, and formerly with flogging also, reform no one, and what's
						
						more, deter hardly a single criminal, and the number of crimes does
						
						not diminish but is continually on the increase. You must admit
						
						that. Consequently the security of society is not preserved, for,
						
						although the obnoxious member is mechanically cut off and sent far
						
						away out of sight, another criminal always comes to take his place
						
						at once, and often two of them. If anything does preserve society,
						
						even in our time, and does regenerate and transform the criminal, it
						
						is only the law of Christ speaking in his conscience. It is only by
						
						recognising his wrongdoing as a son of a Christian society- that is,
						
						of the Church- that he recognises his sin against society- that is,
						
						against the Church. So that it is only against the Church, and not
						
						against the State, that the criminal of to-day can recognise that he
						
						has sinned. If society, as a Church, had jurisdiction, then it would
						
						know when to bring back from exclusion and to reunite to itself. Now
						
						the Church having no real jurisdiction, but only the power of moral
						
						condemnation, withdraws of her own accord from punishing the
						
						criminal actively. She does not excommunicate him but simply
						
						persists in motherly exhortation of him. What is more, the Church even
						
						tries to preserve all Christian communion with the criminal. She
						
						admits him to church services, to the holy sacrament, gives him
						
						alms, and treats him more a captive than as a convict. And what
						
						would become of the criminal, O Lord, if even the Christian society-
						
						that is, the Church- were to reject him even as the civil law
						
						rejects him and cuts him off? What would become of him if the Church
						
						punished him with her excommunication as the direct consequence of the
						
						secular law? There could be no more terrible despair, at least for a
						
						Russian criminal, for Russian criminals still have faith. Though,
						
						who knows, perhaps then a fearful thing would happen, perhaps the
						
						despairing heart of the criminal would lose its faith and then what
						
						would become of him? But the Church, like a tender, loving mother,
						
						holds aloof from active punishment herself, as the sinner is too
						
						severely punished already by the civil law, and there must be at least
						
						someone to have pity on him. The Church holds aloof, above all,
						
						because its judgment is the only one that contains the truth, and
						
						therefore cannot practically and morally be united to any other
						
						judgment even as a temporary compromise. She can enter into no compact
						
						about that. The foreign criminal, they say, rarely repents, for the
						
						very doctrines of to-day confirm him in the idea that his crime is not
						
						a crime, but only a reaction against an unjustly oppressive force.
						
						Society cuts him off completely by a force that triumphs over him
						
						mechanically and (so at least they say of themselves in Europe)
						
						accompanies this exclusion with hatred, forgetfulness, and the most
						
						profound indifference as to the ultimate fate of the erring brother.
						
						In this way, it all takes place without the compassionate intervention
						
						of the Church, for in many cases there are no churches there at all,
						
						for though ecclesiastics and splendid church buildings remain, the
						
						churches themselves have long ago striven to pass from Church into
						
						State and to disappear in it completely. So it seems at least in
						
						Lutheran countries. As for Rome, it was proclaimed a State instead
						
						of a Church a thousand years ago. And so the criminal is no longer
						
						conscious of being a member of the Church and sinks into despair. If
						
						he returns to society, often it is with such hatred that society
						
						itself instinctively cuts him off. You can judge for yourself how it
						
						must end. In many cases it would seem to be the same with us, but
						
						the difference is that besides the established law courts we have
						
						the Church too, which always keeps up relations with the criminal as a
						
						dear and still precious son. And besides that, there is still
						
						preserved, though only in thought, the judgment of the Church, which
						
						though no longer existing in practice is still living as a dream for
						
						the future, and is, no doubt, instinctively recognised by the criminal
						
						in his soul. What was said here just now is true too, that is, that if
						
						the jurisdiction of the Church were introduced in practice in its full
						
						force, that is, if the whole of the society were changed into the
						
						Church, not only the judgment of the Church would have influence on
						
						the reformation of the criminal such as it never has now, but possibly
						
						also the crimes themselves would be incredibly diminished. And there
						
						can be no doubt that the Church would look upon the criminal and the
						
						crime of the future in many cases quite differently and would
						
						succeed in restoring the excluded, in restraining those who plan evil,
						
						and in regenerating the fallen. It is true," said Father Zossima, with
						
						a smile, "the Christian society now is not ready and is only resting
						
						on some seven righteous men, but as they are never lacking, it will
						
						continue still unshaken in expectation of its complete
						
						transformation from a society almost heathen in character into a
						
						single universal and all-powerful Church. So be it, so be it! Even
						
						though at the end of the ages, for it is ordained to come to pass! And
						
						there is no need to be troubled about times and seasons, for the
						
						secret of the times and seasons is in the wisdom of God, in His
						
						foresight, and His love. And what in human reckoning seems still
						
						afar off, may by the Divine ordinance be close at hand, on the eve
						
						of its appearance. And so be it, so be it!
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p28">"So be it, so be it!" Father Paissy repeated austerely and
						
						reverently.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p29">"Strange, extremely strange" Miusov pronounced, not so much with
						
						heat as with latent indignation.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p30">"What strikes you as so strange?" Father Iosif inquired
						
						cautiously.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p31">"Why, it's beyond anything!" cried Miusov, suddenly breaking
						
						out; "the State is eliminated and the Church is raised to the position
						
						of the State. It's not simply Ultramontanism, it's
						
						arch-Ultramontanism! It's beyond the dreams of Pope Gregory the
						
						Seventh!"
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p32">"You are completely misunderstanding it," said Father Paissy
						
						sternly. "Understand, the Church is not to be transformed into the
						
						State. That is Rome and its dream. That is the third temptation of the
						
						devil. On the contrary, the State is transformed into the Church, will
						
						ascend and become a Church over the whole world- which is the complete
						
						opposite of Ultramontanism and Rome, and your interpretation, and is
						
						only the glorious destiny ordained for the Orthodox Church. This
						
						star will arise in the east!"
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p33">Miusov was significantly silent. His whole figure expressed
						
						extraordinary personal dignity. A supercilious and condescending smile
						
						played on his lips. Alyosha watched it all with a throbbing heart. The
						
						whole conversation stirred him profoundly. He glanced casually at
						
						Rakitin, who was standing immovable in his place by the door listening
						
						and watching intently though with downcast eyes. But from the colour
						
						in his cheeks Alyosha guessed that Rakitin was probably no less
						
						excited, and he knew what caused his excitement.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p34">"Allow me to tell you one little anecdote, gentlemen," Miusov said
						
						impressively, with a peculiarly majestic air. "Some years ago, soon
						
						after the coup d'etat of December, I happened to be calling in Paris
						
						on an extremely influential personage in the Government, and I met a
						
						very interesting man in his house. This individual was not precisely a
						
						detective but was a sort of superintendent of a whole regiment of
						
						political detectives- a rather powerful position in its own way. I was
						
						prompted by curiosity to seize the opportunity of conversation with
						
						him. And as he had not come as a visitor but as a subordinate official
						
						bringing a special report, and as he saw the reception given me by his
						
						chief, he deigned to speak with some openness, to a certain extent
						
						only, of course. He was rather courteous than open, as Frenchmen
						
						know how to be courteous, especially to a foreigner. But I
						
						thoroughly understood him. The subject was the socialist
						
						revolutionaries who were at that time persecuted. I will quote only
						
						one most curious remark dropped by this person. 'We are not
						
						particularly afraid,' said he, 'of all these socialists, anarchists,
						
						infidels, and revolutionists; we keep watch on them and know all their
						
						goings on. But there are a few peculiar men among them who believe
						
						in God and are Christians, but at the same time are socialists.
						
						These are the people we are most afraid of. They are dreadful people
						
						The socialist who is a Christian is more to be dreaded than a
						
						socialist who is an atheist.' The words struck me at the time, and now
						
						they have suddenly come back to me here, gentlemen."
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p35">"You apply them to us, and look upon us as socialists?" Father
						
						Paissy asked directly, without beating about the bush.
						
							</p><p id="v_1-p36">But before Pyotr Alexandrovitch could think what to answer, the
						
						door opened, and the guest so long expected, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, came
						
						in. They had, in fact, given up expecting him, and his sudden
						
						appearance caused some surprise for a moment.</p>

					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - Why Is Such a Man Alive?" prev="v_1" next="vii" id="vi">
					
											
						<p id="vi-p1">DMITRI FYODOROVITCH, a young man of eight and twenty, of medium
						
						height and agreeable countenance, looked older than his years. He
						
						was muscular, and showed signs of considerable physical strength.
						
						Yet there was something not healthy in his face. It was rather thin,
						
						his cheeks were hollow, and there was an unhealthy sallowness in their
						
						colour. His rather large, prominent, dark eyes had an expression of
						
						firm determination, and yet there was a vague look in them, too.
						
						Even when he was excited and talking irritably, his eyes somehow did
						
						not follow his mood, but betrayed something else, sometimes quite
						
						incongruous with what was passing. "It's hard to tell what he's
						
						thinking," those who talked to him sometimes declared. People who
						
						saw something pensive and sullen in his eyes were startled by his
						
						sudden laugh, which bore witness to mirthful and light-hearted
						
						thoughts at the very time when his eyes were so gloomy. A certain
						
						strained look in his face was easy to understand at this moment.
						
						Everyone knew, or had heard of, the extremely restless and
						
						dissipated life which he had been leading of late, as well as of the
						
						violent anger to which he had been roused in his quarrels with his
						
						father. There were several stories current in the town about it. It is
						
						true that he was irascible by nature, "of an unstable and unbalanced
						
						mind," as our justice of the peace, Katchalnikov, happily described
						
						him.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p2">He was stylishly and irreproachably dressed in a carefully
						
						buttoned frock-coat. He wore black gloves and carried a top hat.
						
						Having only lately left the army, he still had moustaches and no
						
						beard. His dark brown hair was cropped short, and combed forward on
						
						his temples. He had the long, determined stride of a military man.
						
						He stood still for a moment on the threshold, and glancing at the
						
						whole party went straight up to the elder, guessing him to be their
						
						host. He made him a low bow, and asked his blessing. Father Zossima,
						
						rising in his chair, blessed him. Dmitri kissed his hand respectfully,
						
						and with intense feeling, almost anger, he said:
						
							</p><p id="vi-p3">"Be so generous as to forgive me for having kept you waiting so
						
						long, but Smerdyakov, the valet sent me by my father, in reply to my
						
						inquiries, told me twice over that the appointment was for one. Now
						
						I suddenly learn- "
						
							</p><p id="vi-p4">"Don't disturb yourself," interposed the elder. "No matter. You
						
						are a little late. It's of no consequence.... "
						
							</p><p id="vi-p5">"I'm extremely obliged to you, and expected no less from your
						
						goodness."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p6">Saying this, Dmitri bowed once more. Then, turning suddenly
						
						towards his father, made him, too, a similarly low and respectful bow.
						
						He had evidently considered it beforehand, and made this bow in all
						
						seriousness, thinking it his duty to show his respect and good
						
						intentions.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p7">Although Fyodor Pavlovitch was taken unawares, he was equal to the
						
						occasion. In response to Dmitri's bow he jumped up from his chair
						
						and made his son a bow as low in return. His face was suddenly
						
						solemn and impressive, which gave him a positively malignant look.
						
						Dmitri bowed generally to all present, and without a word walked to
						
						the window with his long, resolute stride, sat down on the only
						
						empty chair, near Father Paissy, and, bending forward, prepared to
						
						listen to the conversation he had interrupted.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p8">Dmitri's entrance had taken no more than two minutes, and the
						
						conversation was resumed. But this time Miusov thought it
						
						unnecessary to reply to Father Paissy's persistent and almost
						
						irritable question.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p9">"Allow me to withdraw from this discussion," he observed with a
						
						certain well-bred nonchalance. "It's a subtle question, too. Here Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch is smiling at us. He must have something interesting to
						
						say about that also. Ask him."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p10">"Nothing special, except one little remark," Ivan replied at once.
						
						"European Liberals in general, and even our liberal dilettanti,
						
						often mix up the final results of socialism with those of
						
						Christianity. This wild notion is, of course, a characteristic
						
						feature. But it's not only Liberals and dilettanti who mix up
						
						socialism and Christianity, but, in many cases, it appears, the
						
						police- the foreign police, of course- do the same. Your Paris
						
						anecdote is rather to the point, Pyotr Alexandrovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p11">"I ask your permission to drop this subject altogether," Miusov
						
						repeated. "I will tell you instead, gentlemen, another interesting and
						
						rather characteristic anecdote of Ivan Fyodorovitch himself. Only five
						
						days ago, in a gathering here, principally of ladies, he solemnly
						
						declared in argument that there was nothing in the whole world to make
						
						men love their neighbours. That there was no law of nature that man
						
						should love mankind, and that, if there had been any love on earth
						
						hitherto, it was not owing to a natural law, but simply because men
						
						have believed in immortality. Ivan Fyodorovitch added in parenthesis
						
						that the whole natural law lies in that faith, and that if you were to
						
						destroy in mankind the belief in immortality, not only love but
						
						every living force maintaining the life of the world would at once
						
						be dried up. Moreover, nothing then would be immoral, everything would
						
						be lawful, even cannibalism. That's not all. He ended by asserting
						
						that for every individual, like ourselves, who does not believe in God
						
						or immortality, the moral law of nature must immediately be changed
						
						into the exact contrary of the former religious law, and that
						
						egoism, even to crime, must become not only lawful but even recognised
						
						as the inevitable, the most rational, even honourable outcome of his
						
						position. From this paradox, gentlemen, you can judge of the rest of
						
						our eccentric and paradoxical friend Ivan Fyodorovitch's theories."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p12">"Excuse me," Dmitri cried suddenly; "if I've heard aright, crime
						
						must not only be permitted but even recognised as the inevitable and
						
						the most rational outcome of his position for every infidel! Is that
						
						so or not?"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p13">"Quite so," said Father Paissy.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p14">"I'll remember it."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p15">Having uttered these words Dmitri ceased speaking as suddenly as
						
						he had begun. Everyone looked at him with curiosity.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p16">"Is that really your conviction as to the consequences of the
						
						disappearance of the faith in immortality?" the elder asked Ivan
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p17">"Yes. That was my contention. There is no virtue if there is no
						
						immortality."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p18">"You are blessed in believing that, or else most unhappy."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p19">"Why unhappy?" Ivan asked smiling.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p20">"Because, in all probability you don't believe yourself in the
						
						immortality of your soul, nor in what you have written yourself in
						
						your article on Church Jurisdiction."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p21">"Perhaps you are right!... But I wasn't altogether joking," Ivan
						
						suddenly and strangely confessed, flushing quickly.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p22">"You were not altogether joking. That's true. The question is
						
						still fretting your heart, and not answered. But the martyr likes
						
						sometimes to divert himself with his despair, as it were driven to
						
						it by despair itself. Meanwhile, in your despair, you, too, divert
						
						yourself with magazine articles, and discussions in society, though
						
						you don't believe your own arguments, and with an aching heart mock at
						
						them inwardly.... That question you have not answered, and it is
						
						your great grief, for it clamours for an answer."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p23">"But can it be answered by me? Answered in the affirmative?"
						
						Ivan went on asking strangely, still looking at the elder with the
						
						same inexplicable smile.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p24">"If it can't be decided in the affirmative, it will never be
						
						decided in the negative. You know that that is the peculiarity of your
						
						heart, and all its suffering is due to it. But thank the Creator who
						
						has given you a lofty heart capable of such suffering; of thinking and
						
						seeking higher things, for our dwelling is in the heavens. God grant
						
						that your heart will attain the answer on earth, and may God bless
						
						your path."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p25">The elder raised his hand and would have made the sign of the
						
						cross over Ivan from where he stood. But the latter rose from his
						
						seat, went up to him, received his blessing, and kissing his hand went
						
						back to his place in silence. His face looked firm and earnest. This
						
						action and all the preceding conversation, which was so surprising
						
						from Ivan, impressed everyone by its strangeness and a certain
						
						solemnity, so that all were silent for a moment, and there was a
						
						look almost of apprehension in Alyosha's face. But Miusov suddenly
						
						shrugged his shoulders. And at the same moment Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						jumped up from his seat.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p26">"Most pious and holy elder," he cried pointing to Ivan, "that is
						
						my son, flesh of my flesh, the dearest of my flesh! He is my most
						
						dutiful Karl Moor, so to speak, while this son who has just come in,
						
						Dmitri, against whom I am seeking justice from you, is the undutiful
						
						Franz Moor- they are both out of Schiller's Robbers, and so I am the
						
						reigning Count von Moor! Judge and save us! We need not only your
						
						prayers but your prophecies!"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p27">"Speak without buffoonery, and don't begin by insulting the
						
						members of your family," answered the elder, in a faint, exhausted
						
						voice. He was obviously getting more and more fatigued, and his
						
						strength was failing.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p28">"An unseemly farce which I foresaw when I came here!" cried Dmitri
						
						indignantly. He too leapt up. "Forgive it, reverend Father," he added,
						
						addressing the elder. "I am not a cultivated man, and I don't even
						
						know how to address you properly, but you have been deceived and you
						
						have been too good-natured in letting us meet here. All my father
						
						wants is a scandal. Why he wants it only he can tell. He always has
						
						some motive. But I believe I know why- "
						
							</p><p id="vi-p29">"They all blame me, all of them!" cried Fyodor Pavlovitch in his
						
						turn. "Pyotr Alexandrovitch here blames me too. You have been
						
						blaming me, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, you have!" he turned suddenly to
						
						Miusov, although the latter was not dreaming of interrupting him.
						
						"They all accuse me of having hidden the children's money in my boots,
						
						and cheated them, but isn't there a court of law? There they will
						
						reckon out for you, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, from your notes, your
						
						letters, and your agreements, how much money you had, how much you
						
						have spent, and how much you have left. Why does Pyotr
						
						Alexandrovitch refuse to pass judgment? Dmitri is not a stranger to
						
						him. Because they are all against me, while Dmitri Fyodorovitch is
						
						in debt to me, and not a little, but some thousands of which I have
						
						documentary proof. The whole town is echoing with his debaucheries.
						
						And where he was stationed before, he several times spent a thousand
						
						or two for the seduction of some respectable girl; we know all about
						
						that, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, in its most secret details. I'll prove
						
						it.... Would you believe it, holy Father, he has captivated the
						
						heart of the most honourable of young ladies of good family and
						
						fortune, daughter of a gallant colonel, formerly his superior officer,
						
						who had received many honours and had the Anna Order on his breast. He
						
						compromised the girl by his promise of marriage, now she is an
						
						orphan and here; she is betrothed to him, yet before her very eyes
						
						he is dancing attendance on a certain enchantress. And although this
						
						enchantress has lived in, so to speak, civil marriage with a
						
						respectable man, yet she is of an independent character, an
						
						unapproachable fortress for everybody, just like a legal wife- for she
						
						is virtuous, yes, holy Fathers, she is virtuous. Dmitri Fyodorovitch
						
						wants to open this fortress with a golden key, and that's why he is
						
						insolent to me now, trying to get money from me, though he has
						
						wasted thousands on this enchantress already. He's continually
						
						borrowing money for the purpose. From whom do you think? Shall I
						
						say, Mitya?"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p30">"Be silent!" cried Dmitri, "wait till I'm gone. Don't dare in my
						
						presence to asperse the good name of an honourable girl! That you
						
						should utter a word about her is an outrage, and I won't permit it!"
						
						He was breathless.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p31">He was breathless. "Mitya! Mitya!" cried Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						hysterically, squeezing out a tear. "And is your father's blessing
						
						nothing to you? If I curse you, what then?"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p32">"Shameless hypocrite! "exclaimed Dmitri furiously.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p33">"He says that to his father! his father What would he be with
						
						others? Gentlemen, only fancy; there's a poor but honourable man
						
						living here, burdened with a numerous family, a captain who got into
						
						trouble and was discharged from the army, but not publicly, not by
						
						court-martial, with no slur on his honour. And three weeks ago, Dmitri
						
						seized him by the beard in a tavern, dragged him out into the street
						
						and beat him publicly, and all because he is an agent in a little
						
						business of mine."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p34">"It's all a lie! Outwardly it's the truth, but inwardly a lie!"
						
						Dmitri was trembling with rage. "Father, I don't justify my action.
						
						Yes, I confess it publicly, I behaved like a brute to that captain,
						
						and I regret it now, and I'm disgusted with myself for my brutal rage.
						
						But this captain, this agent of yours, went to that lady whom you call
						
						an enchantress, and suggested to her from you, that she should take
						
						I.O.U.s of mine which were in your possession, and should sue me for
						
						the money so as to get me into prison by means of them, if I persisted
						
						in claiming an account from you of my property. Now you reproach me
						
						for having a weakness for that lady when you yourself incited her to
						
						captivate me! She told me so to my face.... She told me the story
						
						and laughed at you.... You wanted to put me in prison because you
						
						are jealous of me with her, because you'd begun to force your
						
						attentions upon her; and I know all about that, too; she laughed at
						
						you for that as well- you hear- she laughed at you as she described
						
						it. So here you have this man, this father who reproaches his
						
						profligate son! Gentlemen, forgive my anger, but I foresaw that this
						
						crafty old man would only bring you together to create a scandal. I
						
						had come to forgive him if he held out his hand; to forgive him, and
						
						ask forgiveness! But as he has just this minute insulted not only
						
						me, but an honourable young lady, for whom I feel such reverence
						
						that I dare not take her name in vain, I have made up my mind to
						
						show up his game, though he is my father...."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p35">He could not go on. His eyes were glittering and he breathed
						
						with difficulty. But everyone in the cell was stirred. All except
						
						Father Zossima got up from their seats uneasily. The monks looked
						
						austere but waited for guidance from the elder. He sat still, pale,
						
						not from excitement but from the weakness of disease. An imploring
						
						smile lighted up his face; from time to time he raised his hand, as
						
						though to check the storm, and, of course, a gesture from him would
						
						have been enough to end the scene; but he seemed to be waiting for
						
						something and watched them intently as though trying to make out
						
						something which was not perfectly clear to him. At last Miusov felt
						
						completely humiliated and disgraced.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p36">"We are all to blame for this scandalous scene," he said hotly.
						
						"But I did not foresee it when I came, though I knew with whom I had
						
						to deal. This must be stopped at once! Believe me, your reverence, I
						
						had no precise knowledge of the details that have just come to
						
						light, I was unwilling to believe them, and I learn for the first
						
						time.... A father is jealous of his son's relation with a woman of
						
						loose behaviour and intrigues with the creature to get his son into
						
						prison! This is the company in which I have been forced to be present!
						
						I was deceived. I declare to you all that I was as much deceived as
						
						anyone."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p37">"Dmitri Fyodorovitch," yelled Fyodor Pavlovitch suddenly, in an
						
						unnatural voice, "if you were not my son I would challenge you this
						
						instant to a duel... with pistols, at three paces... across a
						
						handkerchief," he ended, stamping with both feet.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p38">With old liars who have been acting all their lives there are
						
						moments when they enter so completely into their part that they
						
						tremble or shed tears of emotion in earnest, although at that very
						
						moment, or a second later, they are able to whisper to themselves,
						
						"You know you are lying, you shameless old sinner! You're acting
						
						now, in spite of your 'holy' wrath."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p39">Dmitri frowned painfully, and looked with unutterable contempt
						
						at his father.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p40">"I thought... I thought," he said. in a soft and, as it were,
						
						controlled voice, "that I was coming to my native place with the angel
						
						of my heart, my betrothed, to cherish his old age, and I find
						
						nothing but a depraved profligate, a despicable clown!"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p41">"A duel!" yelled the old wretch again, breathless and
						
						spluttering at each syllable. "And you, Pyotr Alexandrovitch Miusov,
						
						let me tell you that there has never been in all your family a
						
						loftier, and more honest- you hear- more honest woman than this
						
						'creature,' as you have dared to call her! And you, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch, have abandoned your betrothed for that 'creature,' so
						
						you must yourself have thought that your betrothed couldn't hold a
						
						candle to her. That's the woman called a "creature"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p42">"Shameful!" broke from Father Iosif.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p43">"Shameful and disgraceful!" Kalganov, flushing crimson cried in
						
						a boyish voice, trembling with emotion. He had been silent till that
						
						moment.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p44">"Why is such a man alive?" Dmitri, beside himself with rage,
						
						growled in a hollow voice, hunching up his shoulders till he looked
						
						almost deformed. "Tell me, can he be allowed to go on defiling the
						
						earth?" He looked round at everyone and pointed at the old man. He
						
						spoke evenly and deliberately.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p45">"Listen, listen, monks, to the parricide!" cried Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, rushing up to Father Iosif. "That's the answer to your
						
						'shameful!' What is shameful? That 'creature,' that 'woman of loose
						
						behaviour' is perhaps holier than you are yourselves, you monks who
						
						are seeking salvation! She fell perhaps in her youth, ruined by her
						
						environment. But she loved much, and Christ himself forgave the
						
						woman 'who loved much.'"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p46">"It was not for such love Christ forgave her," broke impatiently
						
						from the gentle Father Iosif.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p47">"Yes, it was for such, monks, it was! You save your souls here,
						
						eating cabbage, and think you are the righteous. You eat a gudgeon a
						
						day, and you think you bribe God with gudgeon."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p48">"This is unendurable!" was heard on all sides in the cell.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p49">But this unseemly scene was cut short in a most unexpected way.
						
						Father Zossima Father Zossima rose suddenly from his seat. Almost
						
						distracted with anxiety for the elder and everyone else, Alyosha
						
						succeeded, however, in supporting him by the arm. Father Zossima moved
						
						towards Dmitri and reaching him sank on his knees before him.
						
						Alyosha thought that he had fallen from weakness, but this was not so.
						
						The elder distinctly and deliberately bowed down at Dmitri's feet till
						
						his forehead touched the floor. Alyosha was so astounded that he
						
						failed to assist him when he got up again. There was a faint smile
						
						on his lips.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p50">"Good-bye! Forgive me, all of you" he said, bowing on all sides to
						
						his guests.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p51">Dmitri stood for a few moments in amazement. Bowing down to him-
						
						what did it mean? Suddenly he cried aloud, "Oh God!" hid his face in
						
						his hands, and rushed out of the room. All the guests flocked out
						
						after him, in their confusion not saying good-bye, or bowing to
						
						their host. Only the monks went up to him again for a blessing.
						
							"What did it mean, falling at his feet like that? Was it
						
						symbolic or what?" said Fyodor Pavlovitch, suddenly quieted and trying
						
						to reopen conversation without venturing to address anybody in
						
						particular. They were all passing out of the precincts of the
						
						hermitage at the moment.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p52">"I can't answer for a madhouse and for madmen," Miusov answered at
						
						once ill-humouredly, "but I will spare myself your company, Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, and, trust me, for ever. Where's that monk?"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p53">"That monk," that is, the monk who had invited them to dine with
						
						the Superior, did not keep them waiting. He met them as soon as they
						
						came down the steps from the elder's cell, as though he had been
						
						waiting for them all the time.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p54">"Reverend Father, kindly do me a favour. Convey my deepest respect
						
						to the Father Superior, apologise for me, personally, Miusov, to his
						
						reverence, telling him that I deeply regret that owing to unforeseen
						
						circumstances I am unable to have the honour of being present at his
						
						table, greatly I should desire to do so," Miusov said irritably to the
						
						monk.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p55">"And that unforeseen circumstance, of course, is myself," Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch cut in immediately. "Do you hear, Father; this gentleman
						
						doesn't want to remain in my company or else he'd come at once. And
						
						you shall go, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, pray go to the Father Superior and
						
						good appetite to you. I will decline, and not you. Home, home, I'll
						
						eat at home, I don't feel equal to it here, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, my
						
						amiable relative."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p56">"I am not your relative and never have been, you contemptible
						
						man!"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p57">"I said it on purpose to madden you, because you always disclaim
						
						the relationship, though you really are a relation in spite of your
						
						shuffling. I'll prove it by the church calendar. As for you, Ivan,
						
						stay if you like. I'll send the horses for you later. Propriety
						
						requires you to go to the Father Superior, Pyotr Alexandrovitch, to
						
						apologise for the disturbance we've been making...."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p58">"Is it true that you are going home? Aren't you lying?"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p59">"Pyotr Alexandrovitch! How could I dare after what's happened!
						
						Forgive me, gentlemen, I was carried away! And upset besides! And,
						
						indeed, I am ashamed. Gentlemen, one man has the heart of Alexander of
						
						Macedon and another the heart of the little dog Fido. Mine is that
						
						of the little dog Fido. I am ashamed! After such an escapade how can I
						
						go to dinner, to gobble up the monastery's sauces? I am ashamed, I
						
						can't. You must excuse me!"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p60">"The devil only knows, what if he deceives us?" thought Miusov,
						
						still hesitating, and watching the retreating buffoon with distrustful
						
						eyes. The latter turned round, and noticing that Miusov was watching
						
						him, waved him a kiss.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p61">"Well, are you coming to the Superior?" Miusov asked Ivan
						
						abruptly.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p62">"Why not? I was especially invited yesterday."
						
							</p><p id="vi-p63">"Unfortunately I feel myself compelled to go to this confounded
						
						dinner," said Miusov with the same irritability, regardless of the
						
						fact that the monk was listening. "We ought, at least, to apologise
						
						for the disturbance, and explain that it was not our doing. What do
						
						you think?"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p64">Yes, we must explain that it wasn't our doing. Besides, father
						
						won't be there," observed Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p65">"Well, I should hope not! Confound this dinner!"
						
							</p><p id="vi-p66">They all walked on, however. The monk listened in silence. On
						
						the road through the copse he made one observation however- that the
						
						Father Superior had been waiting a long time, and that they were
						
						more than half an hour late. He received no answer. Miusov looked with
						
						hatred at Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="vi-p67">"Here he is, going to the dinner as though nothing had
						
						happened," he thought. "A brazen face, and the conscience of a
						
						Karamazov!"</p>
					
	
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - A Young Man Bent on a Career" prev="vi" next="viii" id="vii">
					
					
						 <p id="vii-p1">ALYOSHA helped Father Zossima to his bedroom and seated him on his
						
						bed. It was a little room furnished with the bare necessities. There
						
						was a narrow iron bedstead, with a strip of felt for a mattress. In
						
						the corner, under the ikons, was a reading-desk with a cross and the
						
						Gospel lying on it. The elder sank exhausted on the bed. His eyes
						
						glittered and he breathed hard. He looked intently at Alyosha, as
						
						though considering something.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p2">"Go, my dear boy, go. Porfiry is enough for me. Make haste, you
						
						are needed there, go and wait at the Father Superior's table."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p3">"Let me stay here," Alyosha entreated.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p4">"You are more needed there. There is no peace there. You will
						
						wait, and be of service. If evil spirits rise up, repeat a prayer. And
						
						remember, my son"- the elder liked to call him that- "this is not
						
						the place for you in the future. When it is God's will to call me,
						
						leave the monastery. Go away for good."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p5">Alyosha started.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p6">"What is it? This is not your place for the time. I bless you
						
						for great service in the world. Yours will be a long pilgrimage. And
						
						you will have to take a wife, too. You will have to bear all before
						
						you come back. There will be much to do. But I don't doubt of you, and
						
						so I send you forth. Christ is with you. Do not abandon Him and He
						
						will not abandon you. You will see great sorrow, and in that sorrow
						
						you will be happy. This is my last message to you: in sorrow seek
						
						happiness. Work, work unceasingly. Remember my words, for although I
						
						shall talk with you again, not only my days but my hours are
						
						numbered."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p7">Alyosha's face again betrayed strong emotion. The corners of his
						
						mouth quivered.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p8">"What is it again?" Father Zossima asked, smiling gently. "The
						
						worldly may follow the dead with tears, but here we rejoice over the
						
						father who is departing. We rejoice and pray for him. Leave me, I must
						
						pray. Go, and make haste. Be near your brothers. And not near one
						
						only, but near both."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p9">Father Zossima raised his hand to bless him. Alyosha could make no
						
						protest, though he had a great longing to remain. He longed, moreover,
						
						to ask the significance of his bowing to Dmitri, the question was on
						
						the tip of his tongue, but he dared not ask it. He knew that the elder
						
						would have explained it unasked if he had thought fit. But evidently
						
						it was not his will. That action had made a terrible impression on
						
						Alyosha; he believed blindly in its mysterious significance.
						
						Mysterious, and perhaps awful.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p10">As he hastened out of the hermatage precincts to reach the
						
						monastery in time to serve at the Father Superior's dinner, he felt
						
						a sudden pang at his heart, and stopped short. He seemed to hear again
						
						Father Zossima's words, foretelling his approaching end. What he had
						
						foretold so exactly must infallibly come to pass. Alyosha believed
						
						that implicitly. But how could he go? He had told him not to weep, and
						
						to leave the monastery. Good God! It was long since Alyosha had
						
						known such anguish. He hurried through the copse that divided the
						
						monastery from the hermitage, and unable to bear the burden of his
						
						thoughts, he gazed at the ancient pines beside the path. He had not
						
						far to go- about five hundred paces. He expected to meet no one at
						
						that hour, but at the first turn of the path he noticed Rakitin. He
						
						was waiting for someone.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p11">"Are you waiting for me?" asked Alyosha, overtaking him.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p12">"Yes," grinned Rakitin. "You are hurrying to the Father
						
						Superior, I know; he has a banquet. There's not been such a banquet
						
						since the Superior entertained the Bishop and General Pahatov, do
						
						you remember? I shan't be there, but you go and hand the sauces.
						
						Tell me one thing, Alexey, what does that vision mean? That's what I
						
						want to ask you."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p13">"What vision?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p14">"That bowing to your brother, Dmitri. And didn't he tap the ground
						
						with his forehead, too!"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p15">"You speak of Father Zossima?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p16">"Yes, of Father Zossima,"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p17">"Tapped the ground?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p18">"Ah, an irreverent expression! Well, what of it? Anyway, what does
						
						that vision mean?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p19">"I don't know what it means, Misha."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p20">"I knew he wouldn't explain it to you There's nothing wonderful
						
						about it, of course, only the usual holy mummery. But there was an
						
						object in the performance. All the pious people in the town will
						
						talk about it and spread the story through the province, wondering
						
						what it meant. To my thinking the old man really has a keen nose; he
						
						sniffed a crime. Your house stinks of it."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p21">Rakitin evidently had something he was eager to speak of.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p22">"It'll be in your family, this crime. Between your brothers and
						
						your rich old father. So Father Zossima flopped down to be ready for
						
						what may turn up. If something happens later on, it'll be: 'Ah, the
						
						holy man foresaw it, prophesied it!' though it's a poor sort of
						
						prophecy, flopping like that. 'Ah, but it was symbolic,' they'll
						
						say, 'an allegory,' and the devil knows what all! It'll be
						
						remembered to his glory: 'He predicted the crime and marked the
						
						criminal!' That's always the way with these crazy fanatics; they cross
						
						themselves at the tavern and throw stones at the temple. Like your
						
						elder, he takes a stick to a just man and falls at the feet of a
						
						murderer."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p23">"What crime? What do you mean?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p24">Alyosha stopped dead. Rakitin stopped, too.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p25">"What murderer? As though you didn't know! I'll bet you've thought
						
						of it before. That's interesting, too, by the way. Listen, Alyosha,
						
						you always speak the truth, though you're always between two stools.
						
						Have you thought of it or not? Answer."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p26">"I have," answered Alyosha in a low voice. Even Rakitin was
						
						taken aback.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p27">"What? Have you really?" he cried.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p28">"I... I've not exactly thought it," muttered Alyosha, "but
						
						directly you began speaking so strangely, I fancied I had thought of
						
						it myself."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p29">"You see? (And how well you expressed it!) Looking at your
						
						father and your brother Mitya to-day you thought of a crime. Then
						
						I'm not mistaken?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p30">"But wait, wait a minute," Alyosha broke in uneasily, "What has
						
						led you to see all this? Why does it interest you? That's the first
						
						question."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p31">"Two questions, disconnected, but natural. I'll deal with them
						
						separately. What led me to see it? I shouldn't have seen it, if I
						
						hadn't suddenly understood your brother Dmitri, seen right into the
						
						very heart of him all at once. I caught the whole man from one
						
						trait. These very honest but passionate people have a line which
						
						mustn't be crossed. If it were, he'd run at your father with a
						
						knife. But your father's a drunken and abandoned old sinner, who can
						
						never draw the line- if they both themselves go, they'll both come
						
						to grief."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p32">"No, Misha, no. If that's all, you've reassured me. It won't
						
						come to that."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p33">"But why are you trembling? Let me tell you; he may be honest, our
						
						Mitya (he is stupid, but honest), but he's- a sensualist. That's the
						
						very definition and inner essence of him. It's your father has
						
						handed him on his low sensuality. Do you know, I simply wonder at you,
						
						Alyosha, how you can have kept your purity. You're a Karamazov too,
						
						you know! In your family sensuality is carried to a disease. But
						
						now, these three sensualists are watching one another, with their
						
						knives in their belts. The three of them are knocking their heads
						
						together, and you may be the fourth."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p34">"You are mistaken about that woman. Dmitri despises her," said
						
						Alyosha, with a sort of shudder.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p35">"Grushenka? No, brother, he doesn't despise her. Since he has
						
						openly abandoned his betrothed for her, he doesn't despise her.
						
						There's something here, my dear boy, that you don't understand yet.
						
						A man will fall in love with some beauty, with a woman's body, or even
						
						with a part of a woman's body (a sensualist can understand that),
						
						and he'll abandon his own children for her, sell his father and
						
						mother, and his country, Russia, too. If he's honest, he'll steal;
						
						if he's humane, he'll murder; if he's faithful, he'll deceive.
						
						Pushkin, the poet of women's feet, sung of their feet in his verse.
						
						Others don't sing their praises, but they can't look at their feet
						
						without a thrill- and it's not only their feet. Contempt's no help
						
						here, brother, even if he did despise Grushenka. He does, but he can't
						
						tear himself away."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p36">"I understand that," Alyosha jerked out suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p37">"Really? Well, I dare say you do understand, since you blurt it
						
						out at the first word," said Rakitin, malignantly. "That escaped you
						
						unawares, and the confession's the more precious. So it's a familiar
						
						subject; you've thought about it already, about sensuality, I mean!
						
						Oh, you virgin soul! You're a quiet one, Alyosha, you're a saint, I
						
						know, but the devil only knows what you've thought about, and what you
						
						know already! You are pure, but you've been down into the depths....
						
						I've been watching you a long time. You're a Karamazov yourself;
						
						you're a thorough Karamazov- no doubt birth and selection have
						
						something to answer for. You're a sensualist from your father, a crazy
						
						saint from your mother. Why do you tremble? Is it true, then? Do you
						
						know, Grushenka has been begging me to bring you along. 'I'll pull off
						
						his cassock,' she says. You can't think how she keeps begging me to
						
						bring you. I wondered why she took such an interest in you. Do you
						
						know, she's an extraordinary woman, too!"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p38">"Thank her and say I'm not coming," said Alyosha, with a
						
						strained smile. "Finish what you were saying, Misha. I'll tell you. my
						
						idea after."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p39">"There's nothing to finish. It's all clear. It's the same old
						
						tune, brother. If even you are a sensualist at heart, what of your
						
						brother, Ivan? He's a Karamazov, too. What is at the root of all you
						
						Karamazovs is that you're all sensual, grasping and crazy! Your
						
						brother Ivan writes theological articles in joke, for some idiotic,
						
						unknown motive of his own, though he's an atheist, and he admits
						
						it's a fraud himself- that's your brother Ivan. He's trying to get
						
						Mitya's betrothed for himself, and I fancy he'll succeed, too. And
						
						what's more, it's with Mitya's consent. For Mitya will surrender his
						
						betrothed to him to be rid of her, and escape to Grushenka. And he's
						
						ready to do that in spite of all his nobility and disinterestedness.
						
						Observe that. Those are the most fatal people! Who the devil can
						
						make you out? He recognises his vileness and goes on with it! Let me
						
						tell you, too, the old man, your father, is standing in Mitya's way
						
						now. He has suddenly gone crazy over Grushenka. His mouth waters at
						
						the sight of her. It's simply on her account he made that scene in the
						
						cell just now, simply because Miusov called her an 'abandoned
						
						creature.' He's worse than a tom-cat in love. At first she was only
						
						employed by him in connection with his taverns and in some other shady
						
						business, but now he has suddenly realised all she is and has gone
						
						wild about her. He keeps pestering her with his offers, not honourable
						
						ones, of course. And they'll come into collision, the precious
						
						father and son, on that path! But Grushenka favours neither of them,
						
						she's still playing with them, and teasing them both, considering
						
						which she can get most out of. For though she could filch a lot of
						
						money from the papa he wouldn't marry her, and maybe he'll turn stingy
						
						in the end, and keep his purse shut. That's where Mitya's value
						
						comes in; he has no money, but he's ready to marry her. Yes, ready
						
						to marry her! to abandon his betrothed, a rare beauty, Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, who's rich, and the daughter of a colonel, and to marry
						
						Grushenka, who has been the mistress of a dissolute old merchant,
						
						Samsonov, a coarse, uneducated, provincial mayor. Some murderous
						
						conflict may well come to pass from all this, and that's what your
						
						brother Ivan is waiting for. It would suit him down to the ground.
						
						He'll carry off Katerina Ivanovna, for whom he is languishing, and
						
						pocket her dowry of sixty thousand. That's very alluring to start
						
						with, for a man of no consequence and a beggar. And, take note, he
						
						won't be wronging Mitya, but doing him the greatest service. For I
						
						know as a fact that Mitya only last week, when he was with some
						
						Gipsy girls drunk in a tavern, cried out aloud that he was unworthy of
						
						his betrothed, Katya, but that his brother Ivan, he was the man who
						
						deserved her. And Katerina Ivanovna will not in the end refuse such
						
						a fascinating man as Ivan. She's hesitating between the two of them
						
						already. And how has that Ivan won you all, so that you all worship
						
						him? He is laughing at you, and enjoying himself at your expense."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p40">"How do you know? How can you speak so confidently?" Alyosha asked
						
						sharply, frowning.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p41">"Why do you ask, and are frightened at my answer? It shows that
						
						you know I'm speaking the truth."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p42">"You don't like Ivan. Ivan wouldn't be tempted by money."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p43">"Really? And the beauty of Katerina Ivanovna? It's not only the
						
						money, though a fortune of sixty thousand is an attraction."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p44">"Ivan is above that. He wouldn't make up to anyone for
						
						thousands. It is not money, it's not comfort Ivan is seeking.
						
						Perhaps it's suffering he is seeking."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p45">"What wild dream now? Oh, you- aristocrats!"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p46">"Ah, Misha, he has a stormy spirit. His mind is in bondage. He
						
						is haunted by a great, unsolved doubt. He is one of those who don't
						
						want millions, but an answer to their questions."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p47">"That's plagiarism, Alyosha. You're quoting your elder's
						
						phrases. Ah, Ivan has set you a problem!" cried Rakitin, with
						
						undisguised malice. His face changed, and his lips twitched. "And
						
						the problem's a stupid one. It is no good guessing it. Rack your
						
						brains- you'll understand it. His article is absurd and ridiculous.
						
						And did you hear his stupid theory just now: if there's no immortality
						
						of the soul, then there's no virtue, and everything is lawful. (And by
						
						the way, do you remember how your brother Mitya cried out: 'I will
						
						remember!') An attractive theory for scoundrels!- (I'm being
						
						abusive, that's stupid.) Not for scoundrels, but for pedantic poseurs,
						
						'haunted by profound, unsolved doubts.' He's showing off, and what
						
						it all comes to is, 'on the one hand we cannot but admit' and 'on
						
						the other it must be confessed!' His whole theory is a fraud! Humanity
						
						will find in itself the power to live for virtue even without
						
						believing in immortality. It will find it in love for freedom, for
						
						equality, for fraternity."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p48">Rakitin could hardly restrain himself in his heat, but,
						
						suddenly, as though remembering something, he stopped short.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p49">"Well, that's enough," he said, with a still more crooked smile.
						
						"Why are you laughing? Do you think I'm a vulgar fool?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p50">"No, I never dreamed of thinking you a vulgar fool. You are clever
						
						but... never mind, I was silly to smile. I understand your getting hot
						
						about it, Misha. I guess from your warmth that you are not indifferent
						
						to Katerina Ivanovna yourself; I've suspected that for a long time,
						
						brother, that's why you don't like my brother Ivan. Are you jealous of
						
						him?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p51">"And jealous of her money, too? Won't you add that?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p52">"I'll say nothing about money. I am not going to insult you."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p53">"I believe it, since you say so, but confound you, and your
						
						brother Ivan with you. Don't you understand that one might very well
						
						dislike him, apart from Katerina Ivanovna. And why the devil should
						
						I like him? He condescends to abuse me, you know. Why haven't I a
						
						right to abuse him?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p54">"I never heard of his saying anything about you, good or bad. He
						
						doesn't speak of you at all."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p55">"But I heard that the day before yesterday at Katerina
						
						Ivanovna's he was abusing me for all he was worth- you see what an
						
						interest he takes in your humble servant. And which is the jealous one
						
						after that, brother, I can't say. He was so good as to express the
						
						opinion that, if I don't go in for the career of an archimandrite in
						
						the immediate future and don't become a monk, I shall be sure to go to
						
						Petersburg and get on to some solid magazine as a reviewer, that I
						
						shall write for the next ten years, and in the end become the owner of
						
						the magazine, and bring it out on the liberal and atheistic side, with
						
						a socialistic tinge, with a tiny gloss of socialism, but keeping a
						
						sharp lookout all the time, that is, keeping in with both sides and
						
						hoodwinking the fools. According to your brother's account, the
						
						tinge of socialism won't hinder me from laying by the proceeds and
						
						investing them under the guidance of some Jew, till at the end of my
						
						career I build a great house in Petersburg and move my publishing
						
						offices to it, and let out the upper stories to lodgers. He has even
						
						chosen the place for it, near the new stone bridge across the Neva,
						
						which they say is to be built in Petersburg."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p56">"Ah, Misha, that's just what will really happen, every word of
						
						it," cried Alyosha, unable to restrain a good-humoured smile.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p57">"You are pleased to be sarcastic, too, Alexey Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p58">"No, no, I'm joking, forgive me. I've something quite different in
						
						my mind. But, excuse me, who can have told you all this? You can't
						
						have been at Katerina Ivanovna's yourself when he was talking about
						
						you?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p59">"I wasn't there, but Dmitri Fyodorovitch was; and I heard him tell
						
						it with my own ears; if you want to know, he didn't tell me, but I
						
						overheard him, unintentionally, of course, for I was sitting in
						
						Grushenka's bedroom and I couldn't go away because Dmitri Fyodorovitch
						
						was in the next room."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p60">"Oh yes, I'd forgotten she was a relation of yours."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p61">"A relation! That Grushenka a relation of mine!" cried Rakitin,
						
						turning crimson. "Are you mad? You're out of your mind!"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p62">"Why, isn't she a relation of yours? I heard so."
						
							</p><p id="vii-p63">"Where can you have heard it? You Karamazovs brag of being an
						
						ancient, noble family, though your father used to run about playing
						
						the buffoon at other men's tables, and was only admitted to the
						
						kitchen as a favour. I may be only a priest's son, and dirt in the
						
						eyes of noblemen like you, but don't insult me so lightly and
						
						wantonly. I have a sense of honour, too, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I
						
						couldn't be a relation of Grushenka, a common harlot. I beg you to
						
						understand that!"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p64">Rakitin was intensely irritated.
						
							</p><p id="vii-p65">"Forgive me, for goodness' sake, I had no idea... besides... how
						
						can you call her a harlot? Is she... that sort of woman?" Alyosha
						
						flushed suddenly. "I tell you again, I heard that she was a relation
						
						of yours. You often go to see her, and you told me yourself you're not
						
						her lover. I never dreamed that you of all people had such contempt
						
						for her! Does she really deserve it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii-p66">"I may have reasons of my own for visiting her. That's not your
						
						business. But as for relationship, your brother, or even your
						
						father, is more likely to make her yours than mine. Well, here we are.
						
						You'd better go to the kitchen. Hullo! what's wrong, what is it? Are
						
						we late? They can't have finished dinner so soon! Have the
						
						Karamazovs been making trouble again? No doubt they have. Here's
						
						your father and your brother Ivan after him. They've broken out from
						
						the Father Superior's. And look, Father Isidor's shouting out
						
						something after them from the steps. And your father's shouting and
						
						waving his arms. I expect he's swearing. Bah, and there goes Miusov
						
						driving away in his carriage. You see, he's going. And there's old
						
						Maximov running!- there must have been a row. There can't have been
						
						any dinner. Surely they've not been beating the Father Superior! Or
						
						have they, perhaps, been beaten? It would serve them right!"
						
							There was reason for Rakitin's exclamations. There had been a
						
						scandalous, an unprecedented scene. It had all come from the impulse
						
						of a moment.</p>			
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 8 - The Scandalous Scene " prev="vii" next="iii_2" id="viii">
					
						<p id="viii-p1">MIUSOV, as a man of breeding and delicacy, could not but feel some
						
						inward qualms, when he reached the Father Superior's with Ivan: he
						
						felt ashamed of having lost his temper. He felt that he ought to
						
						have disdained that despicable wretch, Fyodor Pavlovitch, too much
						
						to have been upset by him in Father Zossima's cell, and so to have
						
						forgotten himself. "The monks were not to blame, in any case," he
						
						reflected, on the steps. "And if they're decent people here (and the
						
						Father Superior, I understand, is a nobleman) why not be friendly
						
						and courteous with them? I won't argue, I'll fall in with
						
						everything, I'll win them by politeness, and... and... show them
						
						that I've nothing to do with that Aesop, that buffoon, that Pierrot,
						
						and have merely been taken in over this affair, just as they have."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p2">He determined to drop his litigation with the monastery, and
						
						relinquish his claims to the wood-cutting and fishery rights at
						
						once. He was the more ready to do this because the rights had become
						
						much less valuable, and he had indeed the vaguest idea where the
						
						wood and river in question were.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p3">These excellent intentions were strengthened when he entered the
						
						Father Superior's dining-room, though, strictly speaking, it was not a
						
						dining-room, for the Father Superior had only two rooms altogether;
						
						they were, however, much larger and more comfortable than Father
						
						Zossima's. But there was no great luxury about the furnishing of these
						
						rooms either. The furniture was of mahogany, covered with leather,
						
						in the old-fashioned style of 1820 the floor was not even stained, but
						
						everything was shining with cleanliness, and there were many choice
						
						flowers in the windows; the most sumptuous thing in the room at the
						
						moment was, of course, the beautifully decorated table. The cloth
						
						was clean, the service shone; there were three kinds of well-baked
						
						bread, two bottles of wine, two of excellent mead, and a large glass
						
						jug of kvas- both the latter made in the monastery, and famous in
						
						the neighbourhood. There was no vodka. Rakitin related afterwards that
						
						there were five dishes: fish-soup made of sterlets, served with little
						
						fish patties; then boiled fish served in a special way; then salmon
						
						cutlets, ice pudding and compote, and finally, blanc-mange. Rakitin
						
						found out about all these good things, for he could not resist peeping
						
						into the kitchen, where he already had a footing. He had a footing
						
						everywhere, and got information about everything. He was of an
						
						uneasy and envious temper. He was well aware of his own considerable
						
						abilities, and nervously exaggerated them in his self-conceit. He knew
						
						he would play a prominent part of some sort, but Alyosha, who was
						
						attached to him, was distressed to see that his friend Rakitin was
						
						dishonourable, and quite unconscious of being so himself, considering,
						
						on the contrary, that because he would not steal money left on the
						
						table he was a man of the highest integrity. Neither Alyosha nor
						
						anyone else could have influenced him in that.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p4">Rakitin, of course, was a person of too little consequence to be
						
						invited to the dinner, to which Father Iosif, Father Paissy, and one
						
						other monk were the only inmates of the monastery invited. They were
						
						already waiting when Miusov, Kalganov, and Ivan arrived. The other
						
						guest, Maximov, stood a little aside, waiting also. The Father
						
						Superior stepped into the middle of the room to receive his guests. He
						
						was a tall, thin, but still vigorous old man, with black hair streaked
						
						with grey, and a long, grave, ascetic face. He bowed to his guests
						
						in silence. But this time they approached to receive his blessing.
						
						Miusov even tried to kiss his hand, but the Father Superior drew it
						
						back in time to avoid the salute. But Ivan and Kalganov went through
						
						the ceremony in the most simple-hearted and complete manner, kissing
						
						his hand as peasants do.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p5">"We must apologise most humbly, your reverence," began Miusov,
						
						simpering affably, and speaking in a dignified and respectful tone.
						
						"Pardon us for having come alone without the gentleman you invited,
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch. He felt obliged to decline the honour of your
						
						hospitality, and not without reason. In the reverend Father
						
						Zossima's cell he was carried away by the unhappy dissension with
						
						his son, and let fall words which were quite out of keeping... in
						
						fact, quite unseemly... as"- he glanced at the monks- "your
						
						reverence is, no doubt, already aware. And therefore, recognising that
						
						he had been to blame, he felt sincere regret and shame, and begged me,
						
						and his son Ivan Fyodorovitch, to convey to you his apologies and
						
						regrets. In brief, he hopes and desires to make amends later. He
						
						asks your blessing, and begs you to forget what has taken place."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p6">As he uttered the last word of his tirade, Miusov completely
						
						recovered his self-complacency, and all traces of his former
						
						irritation disappeared. He fully and sincerely loved humanity again.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p7">The Father Superior listened to him with dignity, and, with a
						
						slight bend of the head, replied:
						
							</p><p id="viii-p8">"I sincerely deplore his absence. Perhaps at our table he might
						
						have learnt to like us, and we him. Pray be seated, gentlemen."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p9">He stood before the holy image, and began to say grace, aloud. All
						
						bent their heads reverently, and Maximov clasped his hands before him,
						
						with peculiar fervour.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p10">It was at this moment that Fyodor Pavlovitch played his last
						
						prank. It must be noted that he really had meant to go home, and
						
						really had felt the impossibility of going to dine with the Father
						
						Superior as though nothing had happened, after his disgraceful
						
						behaviour in the elder's cell. Not that he was so very much ashamed of
						
						himself- quite the contrary perhaps. But still he felt it would be
						
						unseemly to go to dinner. Yet his creaking carriage had hardly been
						
						brought to the steps of the hotel, and he had hardly got into it, when
						
						he suddenly stopped short. He remembered his own words at the elder's:
						
						"I always feel when I meet people that I am lower than all, and that
						
						they all take me for a buffoon; so I say let me play the buffoon,
						
						for you are, every one of you, stupider and lower than I." He longed
						
						to revenge himself on everyone for his own unseemliness. He suddenly
						
						recalled how he had once in the past been asked, "Why do you hate so
						
						and so, so much?" And he had answered them, with his shameless
						
						impudence, "I'll tell you. He has done me no harm. But I played him
						
						a dirty trick, and ever since I have hated him."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p11">Remembering that now, he smiled quietly and malignantly,
						
						hesitating for a moment. His eyes gleamed, and his lips positively
						
						quivered.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p12">"Well, since I have begun, I may as well go on," he decided. His
						
						predominant sensation at that moment might be expressed in the
						
						following words, "Well, there is no rehabilitating myself now. So
						
						let me shame them for all I am worth. I will show them I don't care
						
						what they think- that's all!"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p13">He told the coachman to wait, while with rapid steps he returned
						
						to the monastery and straight to the Father Superior's. He had no
						
						clear idea what he would do, but he knew that he could not control
						
						himself, and that a touch might drive him to the utmost limits of
						
						obscenity, but only to obscenity, to nothing criminal, nothing for
						
						which he could be legally punished. In the last resort, he could
						
						always restrain himself, and had marvelled indeed at himself, on
						
						that score, sometimes. He appeared in the Father Superior's
						
						dining-room, at the moment when the prayer was over, and all were
						
						moving to the table. Standing in the doorway, he scanned the
						
						company, and laughing his prolonged, impudent, malicious chuckle,
						
						looked them all boldly in the face. "They thought I had gone, and here
						
						I am again," he cried to the whole room.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p14">For one moment everyone stared at him without a word; and at
						
						once everyone felt that something revolting, grotesque, positively
						
						scandalous, was about to happen. Miusov passed immediately from the
						
						most benevolent frame of mind to the most savage. All the feelings
						
						that had subsided and died down in his heart revived instantly.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p15">"No! this I cannot endure!" he cried. "I absolutely cannot! and...
						
						I certainly cannot!"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p16">The blood rushed to his head. He positively stammered; but he
						
						was beyond thinking of style, and he seized his hat.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p17">"What is it he cannot?" cried Fyodor Pavlovitch, "that he
						
						absolutely cannot and certainly cannot? Your reverence, am I to come
						
						in or not? Will you receive me as your guest?"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p18">"You are welcome with all my heart," answered the Superior.
						
						"Gentlemen!" he added, "I venture to beg you most earnestly to lay
						
						aside your dissensions, and to be united in love and family harmony-
						
						with prayer to the Lord at our humble table."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p19">"No, no, it is impossible!" cried Miusov, beside himself.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p20">"Well, if it is impossible for Pyotr Alexandrovitch, it is
						
						impossible for me, and I won't stop. That is why I came. I will keep
						
						with Pyotr Alexandrovitch everywhere now. If you will go away, Pyotr
						
						Alexandrovitch, I will go away too, if you remain, I will remain.
						
						You stung him by what you said about family harmony, Father
						
						Superior, he does not admit he is my relation. That's right, isn't it,
						
						von Sohn? Here's von Sohn. How are you, von Sohn?"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p21">"Do you mean me?" muttered Maximov, puzzled.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p22">"Of course I mean you," cried Fyodor Pavlovitch. "Who else? The
						
						Father Superior could not be von Sohn."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p23">"But I am not von Sohn either. I am Maximov."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p24">"No, you are von Sohn. Your reverence, do you know who von Sohn
						
						was? It was a famous murder case. He was killed in a house of
						
						harlotry- I believe that is what such places are called among you-
						
						he was killed and robbed, and in spite of his venerable age, he was
						
						nailed up in a box and sent from Petersburg to Moscow in the luggage
						
						van, and while they were nailing him up, the harlots sang songs and
						
						played the harp, that is to say, the piano. So this is that very von
						
						Solin. He has risen from the dead, hasn't he, von Sohn?"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p25">"What is happening? What's this?" voices were heard in the group
						
						of monks.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p26">"Let us go," cried Miusov, addressing Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p27">"No, excuse me," Fyodor Pavlovitch broke in shrilly, taking
						
						another step into the room. "Allow me to finish. There in the cell you
						
						blamed me for behaving disrespectfully just because I spoke of
						
						eating gudgeon, Pyotr Alexandrovitch. Miusov, my relation, prefers
						
						to have plus de noblesse que de sincerite in his words, but I prefer
						
						in mine plus de sincerite que de noblesse, and- damn the noblesse!
						
						That's right, isn't it, von Sohn? Allow me, Father Superior, though
						
						I am a buffoon and play the buffoon, yet I am the soul of honour,
						
						and I want to speak my mind. Yes, I am the soul of honour, while in
						
						Pyotr Alexandrovitch there is wounded vanity and nothing else. I
						
						came here perhaps to have a look and speak my mind. My son, Alexey, is
						
						here, being saved. I am his father; I care for his welfare, and it
						
						is my duty to care. While I've been playing the fool, I have been
						
						listening and having a look on the sly; and now I want to give you the
						
						last act of the performance. You know how things are with us? As a
						
						thing falls, so it lies. As a thing once has fallen, so it must lie
						
						for ever. Not a bit of it! I want to get up again. Holy Father, I am
						
						indignant with you. Confession is a great sacrament, before which I am
						
						ready to bow down reverently; but there in the cell, they all kneel
						
						down and confess aloud. Can it be right to confess aloud? It was
						
						ordained by the holy Fathers to confess in secret: then only your
						
						confession will be a mystery, and so it was of old. But how can I
						
						explain to him before everyone that I did this and that... well, you
						
						understand what- sometimes it would not be proper to talk about it- so
						
						it is really a scandal! No, Fathers, one might be carried along with
						
						you to the Flagellants, I dare say.... at the first opportunity I
						
						shall write to the Synod, and I shall take my son, Alexey, home."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p28">We must note here that Fyodor Pavlovitch knew where to look for
						
						the weak spot. There had been at one time malicious rumours which
						
						had even reached the Archbishop (not only regarding our monastery, but
						
						in others where the institution of elders existed) that too much
						
						respect was paid to the elders, even to the detriment of the authority
						
						of the Superior, that the elders abused the sacrament of confession
						
						and so on and so on- absurd charges which had died away of
						
						themselves everywhere. But the spirit of folly, which had caught up
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch and was bearing him on the current of his own nerves
						
						into lower and lower depths of ignominy, prompted him with this old
						
						slander. Fyodor Pavlovitch did not understand a word of it, and he
						
						could not even put it sensibly, for on this occasion no one had been
						
						kneeling and confessing aloud in the elder's cell, so that he could
						
						not have seen anything of the kind. He was only speaking from confused
						
						memory of old slanders. But as soon as he had uttered his foolish
						
						tirade, he felt he had been talking absurd nonsense, and at once
						
						longed to prove to his audience, and above all to himself, that he had
						
						not been talking nonsense. And, though he knew perfectly well that
						
						with each word he would be adding more and more absurdity, he could
						
						not restrain himself, and plunged forward blindly.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p29">"How disgraceful!" cried Pyotr Alexandrovitch.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p30">"Pardon me!" said the Father Superior. "It was said of old,
						
						'Many have begun to speak against me and have uttered evil sayings
						
						about me. And hearing it I have said to myself: it is the correction
						
						of the Lord and He has sent it to heal my vain soul.' And so we humbly
						
						thank you, honoured guest!" and he made Fyodor Pavlovitch a low bow.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p31">"Tut- tut- tut- sanctimoniousness and stock phrases! Old phrases
						
						and old gestures. The old lies and formal prostrations. We know all
						
						about them. A kiss on the lips and a dagger in the heart, as in
						
						Schiller's Robbers. I don't like falsehood, Fathers, I want the truth.
						
						But the truth is not to be found in eating gudgeon and that I proclaim
						
						aloud! Father monks, why do you fast? Why do you expect reward in
						
						heaven for that? Why, for reward like that I will come and fast too!
						
						No, saintly monk, you try being virtuous in the world, do good to
						
						society, without shutting yourself up in a monastery at other people's
						
						expense, and without expecting a reward up aloft for it- you'll find
						
						that a bit harder. I can talk sense, too, Father Superior. What have
						
						they got here?" He went up to the table. "Old port wine, mead brewed
						
						by the Eliseyev Brothers. Fie, fie, fathers! That is something
						
						beyond gudgeon. Look at the bottles the fathers have brought out, he
						
						he he! And who has provided it all? The Russian peasant, the labourer,
						
						brings here the farthing earned by his horny hand, wringing it from
						
						his family and the tax-gatherer! You bleed the people, you know,
						
						holy Fathers."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p32">"This is too disgraceful!" said Father Iosif.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p33">Father Paissy kept obstinately silent. Miusov rushed from the
						
						room, and Kalgonov after him.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p34">"Well, Father, I will follow Pyotr Alexandrovitch! I am not coming
						
						to see you again. You may beg me on your knees, I shan't come. I
						
						sent you a thousand roubles, so you have begun to keep your eye on me.
						
						He he he! No, I'll say no more. I am taking my revenge for my youth,
						
						for all the humiliation I endured." He thumped the table with his fist
						
						in a paroxysm of simulated feeling. "This monastery has played a great
						
						part in my life! It has cost me many bitter tears. You used to set
						
						my wife, the crazy one, against me. You cursed me with bell and
						
						book, you spread stories about me all over the place. Enough, fathers!
						
						This is the age of Liberalism, the age of steamers and railways.
						
						Neither a thousand, nor a hundred roubles, no, nor a hundred farthings
						
						will you get out of me!"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p35">It must be noted again that our monastery never had played any
						
						great part in his life, and he never had shed a bitter tear owing to
						
						it. But he was so carried away by his simulated emotion, that he was
						
						for one moment almost believing it himself. He was so touched he was
						
						almost weeping. But at that very instant, he felt that it was time
						
						to draw back.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p36">The Father Superior bowed his head at his malicious lie, and again
						
						spoke impressively:
						
							</p><p id="viii-p37">"It is written again, 'Bear circumspectly and gladly dishonour
						
						that cometh upon thee by no act of thine own, be not confounded and
						
						hate not him who hath dishonoured thee.' And so will we."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p38">"Tut, tut, tut! Bethinking thyself and the rest of the
						
						rigmarole. Bethink yourselves Fathers, I will go. But I will take my
						
						son, Alexey, away from here for ever, on my parental authority. Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch, my most dutiful son, permit me to order you to follow
						
						me. Von Sohn, what have you to stay for? Come and see me now in the
						
						town. It is fun there. It is only one short verst; instead of lenten
						
						oil, I will give you sucking-pig and kasha. We will have dinner with
						
						some brandy and liqueur to it.... I've cloudberry wine. Hey, von Sohn,
						
						don't lose your chance." He went out, shouting and gesticulating.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p39">It was at that moment Rakitin saw him and pointed him out to
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p40">"Alexey!" his father shouted, from far off, catching sight of him.
						
						"You come home to me to-day, for good, and bring your pillow and
						
						mattress, and leave no trace behind."
						
						</p><p id="viii-p41">Alyosha stood rooted to the spot, watching the scene in silence.
						
						Meanwhile, Fyodor Pavlovitch had got into the carriage, and Ivan was
						
						about to follow him in grim silence without even turning to say
						
						good-bye to Alyosha. But at this point another almost incredible scene
						
						of grotesque buffoonery gave the finishing touch to the episode.
						
						Maximov suddenly appeared by the side of the carriage. He ran up,
						
						panting, afraid of being too late. Rakitin and Alyosha saw him
						
						running. He was in such a hurry that in his impatience he put his foot
						
						on the step on which Ivan's left foot was still resting, and clutching
						
						the carriage he kept trying to jump in. "I am going with you! " he
						
						kept shouting, laughing a thin mirthful laugh with a look of
						
						reckless glee in his face. "Take me, too."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p42">"There!" cried Fyodor Pavlovitch, delighted. "Did I not say he was
						
						von Sohn. It is von Sohn himself, risen from the dead. Why, how did
						
						you tear yourself away? What did you von Sohn there? And how could you
						
						get away from the dinner? You must be a brazen-faced fellow! I am that
						
						myself, but I am surprised at you, brother! Jump in, jump in! Let
						
						him pass, Ivan. It will be fun. He can lie somewhere at our feet. Will
						
						you lie at our feet, von Sohn? Or perch on the box with the
						
						coachman. Skip on to the box, von Sohn!"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p43">But Ivan, who had by now taken his seat, without a word gave
						
						Maximov a violent punch in the breast and sent him flying. It was
						
						quite by chance he did not fall.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p44">"Drive on!" Ivan shouted angrily to the coachman.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p45">"Why, what are you doing, what are you about? Why did you do
						
						that?" Fyodor Pavlovitch protested.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p46">But the carriage had already driven away. Ivan made no reply.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p47">"Well, you are a fellow," Fyodor Pavlovitch said again.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p48">After a pause of two minutes, looking askance at his son, "Why, it
						
						was you got up all this monastery business. You urged it, you approved
						
						of it. Why are you angry now?"
						
							</p><p id="viii-p49">"You've talked rot enough. You might rest a bit now," Ivan snapped
						
						sullenly.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p50">Fyodor Pavlovitch was silent again for two minutes.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p51">"A drop of brandy would be nice now," he observed sententiously,
						
						but Ivan made no response.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p52">"You shall have some, too, when we get home."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p53">Ivan was still silent.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p54">Fyodor Pavlovitch waited another two minutes.
						
							</p><p id="viii-p55">"But I shall take Alyosha away from the monastery, though you will
						
						dislike it so much, most honoured Karl von Moor."
						
							</p><p id="viii-p56">Ivan shrugged his shoulders contemptuously, and turning away
						
						stared at the road. And they did not speak again all the way home.	</p>		
											
					
					
					</div4> 			
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book III - The Sensualists" prev="viii" next="i_5" id="iii_2">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - In the Servants' Quarters" prev="iii_2" next="ii_3" id="i_5">
					
						<p id="i_5-p1">THE Karamazovs' house was far from being in the centre of the
						
						town, but it was not quite outside it. It was a pleasant-looking old
						
						house of two stories, painted grey, with a red iron roof. It was roomy
						
						and snug, and might still last many years. There were all sorts of
						
						unexpected little cupboards and closets and staircases. There were
						
						rats in it, but Fyodor Pavlovitch did not altogether dislike them.
						
						"One doesn't feel so solitary when one's left alone in the evening,"
						
						he used to say. It was his habit to send the servants away to the
						
						lodge for the night and to lock himself up alone. The lodge was a
						
						roomy and solid building in the yard. Fyodor Pavlovitch used to have
						
						the cooking done there, although there was a kitchen in the house;
						
						he did not like the smell of cooking, and, winter and summer alike,
						
						the dishes were carried in across the courtyard. The house was built
						
						for a large family; there was room for five times as many, with
						
						their servants. But at the time of our story there was no one living
						
						in the house but Fyodor Pavlovitch and his son Ivan. And in the
						
						lodge there were only three servants: old Grigory, and his old wife
						
						Marfa, and a young man called Smerdyakov. Of these three we must say a
						
						few words. Of old Grigory we have said something already. He was
						
						firm and determined and went blindly and obstinately for his object,
						
						if once be had been brought by any reasons (and they were often very
						
						illogical ones) to believe that it was immutably right. He was
						
						honest and incorruptible. His wife, Marfa Ignatyevna, had obeyed her
						
						husband's will implicitly all her life, yet she had pestered him
						
						terribly after the emancipation of the serfs. She was set on leaving
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch and opening a little shop in Moscow with their small
						
						savings. But Grigory decided then, once for all, that "the woman's
						
						talking nonsense, for every woman is dishonest," and that they ought
						
						not to leave their old master, whatever he might be, for "that was now
						
						their duty."
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p2">"Do you understand what duty is?" he asked Marfa Ignatyevna.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p3">"I understand what duty means, Grigory Vassilyevitch, but why it's
						
						our duty to stay here I never shall understand," Marfa answered
						
						firmly.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p4">"Well, don't understand then. But so it shall be. And you hold
						
						your tongue."
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p5">And so it was. They did not go away, and Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						promised them a small sum for wages, and paid it regularly. Grigory
						
						knew, too, that he had an indisputable influence over his master. It
						
						was true, and he was aware of it. Fyodor Pavlovitch was an obstinate
						
						and cunning buffoon, yet, though his will was strong enough "in some
						
						of the affairs of life," as he expressed it, he found himself, to
						
						his surprise, extremely feeble in facing certain other emergencies. He
						
						knew his weaknesses and was afraid of them. There are positions in
						
						which one has to keep a sharp lookout. And that's not easy without a
						
						trustworthy man, and Grigory was a most trustworthy man. Many times in
						
						the course of his life Fyodor Pavlovitch had only just escaped a sound
						
						thrashing through Grigory's intervention, and on each occasion the old
						
						servant gave him a good lecture. But it wasn't only thrashings that
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch was afraid of. There were graver occasions, and very
						
						subtle and complicated ones, when Fyodor Pavlovitch could not have
						
						explained the extraordinary craving for someone faithful and
						
						devoted, which sometimes unaccountably came upon him all in a
						
						moment. It was almost a morbid condition. Corrupt and often cruel in
						
						his lust, like some noxious insect, Fyodor Pavlovitch was sometimes,
						
						in moments of drunkenness, overcome by superstitious terror and a
						
						moral convulsion which took an almost physical form. "My soul's simply
						
						quaking in my throat at those times," he used to say. At such
						
						moments he liked to feel that there was near at hand, in the lodge
						
						if not in the room, a strong, faithful man, virtuous and unlike
						
						himself, who had seen all his debauchery and knew all his secrets, but
						
						was ready in his devotion to overlook all that, not to oppose him,
						
						above all, not to reproach him or threaten him with anything, either
						
						in this world or in the next, and, in case of need, to defend him-
						
						from whom? From somebody unknown, but terrible and dangerous. What
						
						he needed was to feel that there was another man, an old and tried
						
						friend, that he might call him in his sick moments merely to look at
						
						his face, or, perhaps, exchange some quite irrelevant words with
						
						him. And if the old servant were not angry, he felt comforted, and
						
						if he were angry, he was more dejected. It happened even (very
						
						rarely however) that Fyodor Pavlovitch went at night to the lodge to
						
						wake Grigory and fetch him for a moment. When the old man came, Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch would begin talking about the most trivial matters, and
						
						would soon let him go again, sometimes even with a jest. And after
						
						he had gone, Fyodor Pavlovitch would get into bed with a curse and
						
						sleep the sleep of the just. Something of the same sort had happened
						
						to Fyodor Pavlovitch on Alyosha's arrival. Alyosha "pierced his heart"
						
						by "living with him, seeing everything and blaming nothing." Moreover,
						
						Alyosha brought with him something his father had never known
						
						before: a complete absence of contempt for him and an invariable
						
						kindness, a perfectly natural unaffected devotion to the old man who
						
						deserved it so little. All this was a complete surprise to the old
						
						profligate, who had dropped all family ties. It was a new and
						
						surprising experience for him, who had till then loved nothing but
						
						"evil." When Alyosha had left him, he confessed to himself that he had
						
						learnt something he had not till then been willing to learn.
						
							I have mentioned already that Grigory had detested Adelaida
						
						Ivanovna, the first wife of Fyodor Pavlovitch and the mother of
						
						Dmitri, and that he had, on the contrary, protected Sofya Ivanovna,
						
						the poor "crazy woman," against his master and anyone who chanced to
						
						speak ill or lightly of her. His sympathy for the unhappy wife had
						
						become something sacred to him, so that even now, twenty years
						
						after, he could not bear a slighting allusion to her from anyone,
						
						and would at once check the offender. Externally, Grigory was cold,
						
						dignified and taciturn, and spoke, weighing his words, without
						
						frivolity. It was impossible to tell at first sight whether he loved
						
						his meek, obedient wife; but he really did love her, and she knew it.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p6">Marfa Ignatyevna was by no means foolish; she was probably,
						
						indeed, cleverer than her husband, or, at least, more prudent than
						
						he in worldly affairs, and yet she had given in to him in everything
						
						without question or complaint ever since her marriage, and respected
						
						him for his spiritual superiority. It was remarkable how little they
						
						spoke to one another in the course of their lives, and only of the
						
						most necessary daily affairs. The grave and dignified Grigory
						
						thought over all his cares and duties alone, so that Marfa
						
						Ignatyevna had long grown used to knowing that he did not need her
						
						advice. She felt that her husband respected her silence, and took it
						
						as a sign of her good sense. He had never beaten her but once, and
						
						then only slightly. Once during the year after Fyodor Pavlovitch's
						
						marriage with Adelaida Ivanovna, the village girls and women- at
						
						that time serfs- were called together before the house to sing and
						
						dance. They were beginning "In the Green Meadows," when Marfa, at that
						
						time a young woman, skipped forward and danced "the Russian Dance,"
						
						not in the village fashion, but as she had danced it when she was a
						
						servant in the service of the rich Miusov family, in their private
						
						theatre, where the actors were taught to dance by a dancing master
						
						from Moscow. Grigory saw how his wife danced, and, an hour later, at
						
						home in their cottage he gave her a lesson, pulling her hair a little.
						
						But there it ended: the beating was never repeated, and Marfa
						
						Ignatyevna gave up dancing.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p7">God had not blessed them with children. One child was born but
						
						it died. Grigory was fond of children, and was not ashamed of
						
						showing it. When Adelaida Ivanovna had run away, Grigory took
						
						Dmitri, then a child of three years old, combed his hair and washed
						
						him in a tub with his own hands, and looked after him for almost a
						
						year. Afterwards he had looked after Ivan and Alyosha, for which the
						
						general's widow had rewarded him with a slap in the face; but I have
						
						already related all that. The only happiness his own child had brought
						
						him had been in the anticipation of its birth. When it was born, he
						
						was overwhelmed with grief and horror. The baby had six fingers.
						
						Grigory was so crushed by this, that he was not only silent till the
						
						day of the christening, but kept away in the garden. It was spring,
						
						and he spent three days digging the kitchen garden. The third day
						
						was fixed for christening the baby: meantime Grigory had reached a
						
						conclusion. Going into the cottage where the clergy were assembled and
						
						the visitors had arrived, including Fyodor Pavlovitch, who was to
						
						stand godfather, he suddenly announced that the baby "ought not to
						
						be christened at all." He announced this quietly, briefly, forcing out
						
						his words, and gazing with dull intentness at the priest.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p8">"Why not?" asked the priest with good-humoured surprise.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p9">"Because it's a dragon," muttered Grigory.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p10">"A dragon? What dragon?"
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p11">Grigory did not speak for some time. "It's a confusion of nature,"
						
						he muttered vaguely, but firmly, and obviously unwilling to say more.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p12">They laughed, and, of course, christened the poor baby. Grigory
						
						prayed earnestly at the font, but his opinion of the new-born child
						
						remained unchanged. Yet he did not interfere in any way. As long as
						
						the sickly infant lived he scarcely looked at it, tried indeed not
						
						to notice it, and for the most part kept out of the cottage. But when,
						
						at the end of a fortnight, the baby died of thrush, he himself laid
						
						the child in its little coffin, looked at it in profound grief, and
						
						when they were filling up the shallow little grave he fell on his
						
						knees and bowed down to the earth. He did not for years afterwards
						
						mention his child, nor did Marfa speak of the baby before him, and,
						
						even if Grigory were not present, she never spoke of it above a
						
						whisper. Marfa observed that, from the day of the burial, he devoted
						
						himself to "religion," and took to reading the Lives of the Saints,
						
						for the most part sitting alone and in silence, and always putting
						
						on his big, round, silver-rimmed spectacles. He rarely read aloud,
						
						only perhaps in Lent. He was fond of the Book of Job, and had
						
						somehow got hold of a copy of the sayings and sermons of "the God
						
						fearing Father Isaac the Syrian, which he read persistently for
						
						years together, understanding very little of it, but perhaps prizing
						
						and loving it the more for that. Of late he had begun to listen to the
						
						doctrines of the sect of Flagellants settled in the neighbourhood.
						
						He was evidently shaken by them, but judged it unfitting to go over to
						
						the new faith. His habit of theological reading gave him an expression
						
						of still greater gravity.
						
							</p><p id="i_5-p13">He was perhaps predisposed to mysticism. And the birth of his
						
						deformed child, and its death, had, as though by special design,
						
						been accompanied by another strange and marvellous event, which, as he
						
						said later, had left a "stamp" upon his soul. It happened that, on the
						
						very night after the burial of his child, Marfa was awakened by the
						
						wail of a new-born baby. She was frightened and waked her husband.
						
						He listened and said he thought it was more like someone groaning, "it
						
						might be a woman." He got up and dressed. It was a rather warm night
						
						in May. As he went down the steps, he distinctly heard groans coming
						
						from the garden. But the gate from the yard into the garden was locked
						
						at night, and there was no other way of entering it, for it was
						
						enclosed all round by a strong, high fence. Going back into the house,
						
						Grigory lighted a lantern, took the garden key, and taking no notice
						
						of the hysterical fears of his wife, who was still persuaded that
						
						she heard a child crying, and that it was her own baby crying and
						
						calling for her, went into the garden in silence. There he heard at
						
						once that the groans came from the bath-house that stood near the
						
						garden gate, and that they were the groans of a woman. Opening the
						
						door of the bath-house, he saw a sight which petrified him. An idiot
						
						girl, who wandered about the streets and was known to the whole town
						
						by the nickname of Lizaveta Smerdyastchaya (Stinking Lizaveta), had
						
						got into the bath-house and had just given birth to a child. She lay
						
						dying with the baby beside her. She said nothing, for she had never
						
						been able to speak. But her story needs a chapter to itself.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - Lizaveta" prev="i_5" next="iii_3" id="ii_3">
					
						<p id="ii_3-p1">THERE was one circumstance which struck Grigory particularly,
						
						and confirmed a very unpleasant and revolting suspicion. This Lizaveta
						
						was a dwarfish creature, "not five foot within a wee bit," as many
						
						of the pious old women said pathetically about her, after her death.
						
						Her broad, healthy, red face had a look of blank idiocy and the
						
						fixed stare in her eyes was unpleasant, in spite of their meek
						
						expression. She wandered about, summer and winter alike, barefooted,
						
						wearing nothing but a hempen smock. Her coarse, almost black hair
						
						curled like lamb's wool, and formed a sort of huge cap on her head. It
						
						was always crusted with mud, and had leaves; bits of stick, and
						
						shavings clinging to it, as she always slept on the ground and in
						
						the dirt. Her father, a homeless, sickly drunkard, called Ilya, had
						
						lost everything and lived many years as a workman with some well-to-do
						
						tradespeople. Her mother had long been dead. Spiteful and diseased,
						
						Ilya used to beat Lizaveta inhumanly whenever she returned to him. But
						
						she rarely did so, for everyone in the town was ready to look after
						
						her as being an idiot, and so specially dear to God. Ilya's employers,
						
						and many others in the town, especially of the tradespeople, tried
						
						to clothe her better, and always rigged her out with high boots and
						
						sheepskin coat for the winter. But, although she allowed them to dress
						
						her up without resisting, she usually went away, preferably to the
						
						cathedral porch, and taking off all that had been given her- kerchief,
						
						sheepskin, skirt or boots- she left them there and walked away
						
						barefoot in her smock as before. It happened on one occasion that a
						
						new governor of the province, making a tour of inspection in our town,
						
						saw Lizaveta, and was wounded in his tenderest susceptibilities. And
						
						though he was told she was an idiot, he pronounced that for a young
						
						woman of twenty to wander about in nothing but a smock was a breach of
						
						the proprieties, and must not occur again. But the governor went his
						
						way, and Lizaveta was left as she was. At last her father died,
						
						which made her even more acceptable in the eyes of the religious
						
						persons of the town, as an orphan. In fact, everyone seemed to like
						
						her; even the boys did not tease her, and the boys of our town,
						
						especially the schoolboys, are a mischievous set. She would walk
						
						into strange houses, and no one drove her away. Everyone was kind to
						
						her and gave her something. If she were given a copper, she would take
						
						it, and at once drop it in the alms-jug of the church or prison. If
						
						she were given a roll or bun in the market, she would hand it to the
						
						first child she met. Sometimes she would stop one of the richest
						
						ladies in the town and give it to her, and the lady would be pleased
						
						to take it. She herself never tasted anything but black bread and
						
						water. If she went into an expensive shop, where there were costly
						
						goods or money lying about, no one kept watch on her, for they knew
						
						that if she saw thousands of roubles overlooked by them, she would not
						
						have touched a farthing. She scarcely ever went to church. She slept
						
						either in the church porch or climbed over a hurdle (there are many
						
						hurdles instead of fences to this day in our town) into a kitchen
						
						garden. She used at least once a week to turn up "at home," that is at
						
						the house of her father's former employers, and in the winter went
						
						there every night, and slept either in the passage or the cow-house.
						
						People were amazed that she could stand such a life, but she was
						
						accustomed to it, and, although she was so tiny, she was of a robust
						
						constitution. Some of the townspeople declared that she did all this
						
						only from pride, but that is hardly credible. She could hardly
						
						speak, and only from time to time uttered an inarticulate grunt. How
						
						could she have been proud?
						
							</p><p id="ii_3-p2">It happened one clear, warm, moonlight night in September (many
						
						years ago) five or six drunken revellers were returning from the
						
						club at a very late hour, according to our provincial notions. They
						
						passed through the "backway," which led between the back gardens of
						
						the houses, with hurdles on either side. This way leads out on to
						
						the bridge over the long, stinking pool which we were accustomed to
						
						call a river. Among the nettles and burdocks under the hurdle our
						
						revellers saw Lizaveta asleep. They stopped to look at her,
						
						laughing, and began jesting with unbridled licentiousness. It occurred
						
						to one young gentleman to make the whimsical inquiry whether anyone
						
						could possibly look upon such an animal as a woman, and so forth....
						
						They all pronounced with lofty repugnance that it was impossible.
						
						But Fyodor Pavlovitch, who was among them, sprang forward and declared
						
						that it was by no means impossible, and that, indeed, there was a
						
						certain piquancy about it, and so on.... It is true that at that
						
						time he was overdoing his part as a buffoon. He liked to put himself
						
						forward and entertain the company, ostensibly on equal terms, of
						
						course, though in reality he was on a servile footing with them. It
						
						was just at the time when he had received the news of his first wife's
						
						death in Petersburg, and, with crape upon his hat, was drinking and
						
						behaving so shamelessly that even the most reckless among us were
						
						shocked at the sight of him. The revellers, of course, laughed at this
						
						unexpected opinion; and one of them even began challenging him to
						
						act upon it. The others repelled the idea even more emphatically,
						
						although still with the utmost hilarity, and at last they went on
						
						their way. Later on, Fyodor Pavlovitch swore that he had gone with
						
						them, and perhaps it was so, no one knows for certain, and no one ever
						
						knew. But five or six months later, all the town was talking, with
						
						intense and sincere indignation, of Lizaveta's condition, and trying
						
						to find out who was the miscreant who had wronged her. Then suddenly a
						
						terrible rumour was all over the town that this miscreant was no other
						
						than Fyodor Pavlovitch. Who set the rumour going? Of that drunken band
						
						five had left the town and the only one still among us was an
						
						elderly and much respected civil councillor, the father of grown-up
						
						daughters, who could hardly have spread the tale, even if there had
						
						been any foundation for it. But rumour pointed straight at Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, and persisted in pointing at him. Of course this was no
						
						great grievance to him: he would not have troubled to contradict a set
						
						of tradespeople. In those days he was proud, and did not condescend to
						
						talk except in his own circle of the officials and nobles, whom he
						
						entertained so well.
						
							</p><p id="ii_3-p3">At the time, Grigory stood up for his master vigorously. He
						
						provoked quarrels and altercations in defence of him and succeeded
						
						in bringing some people round to his side. "It's the wench's own
						
						fault," he asserted, and the culprit was Karp, a dangerous convict,
						
						who had escaped from prison and whose name was well known to us, as he
						
						had hidden in our town. This conjecture sounded plausible, for it
						
						was remembered that Karp had been in the neighbourhood just at that
						
						time in the autumn, and had robbed three people. But this affair and
						
						all the talk about it did not estrange popular sympathy from the
						
						poor idiot. She was better looked after than ever. A well-to-do
						
						merchants's widow named Kondratyev arranged to take her into her house
						
						at the end of April, meaning not to let her go out until after the
						
						confinement. They kept a constant watch over her, but in spite of
						
						their vigilance she escaped on the very last day, and made her way
						
						into Fyodor Pavlovitch's garden. How, in her condition, she managed to
						
						climb over the high, strong fence remained a mystery. Some
						
						maintained that she must have been lifted over by somebody; others
						
						hinted at something more uncanny. The most likely explanation is
						
						that it happened naturally- that Lizaveta, accustomed to clambering
						
						over hurdles to sleep in gardens, had somehow managed to climb this
						
						fence, in spite of her condition, and had leapt down, injuring
						
						herself.
						
							</p><p id="ii_3-p4">Grigory rushed to Marfa and sent her to Lizaveta, while he ran
						
						to fetch an old midwife who lived close by. They saved the baby, but
						
						Lizaveta died at dawn. Grigory took the baby, brought it home, and
						
						making his wife sit down, put it on her lap. "A child of God- an
						
						orphan is akin to all," he said, "and to us above others. Our little
						
						lost one has sent us this, who has come from the devil's son and a
						
						holy innocent. Nurse him and weep no more."
						
							</p><p id="ii_3-p5">So Marfa brought up the child. He was christened Pavel, to which
						
						people were not slow in adding Fyodorovitch (son of Fyodor). Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch did not object to any of this, and thought it amusing,
						
						though he persisted vigorously in denying his responsibility. The
						
						townspeople were pleased at his adopting the foundling. Later on,
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch invented a surname for the child, calling him
						
						Smerdyakov, after his mother's nickname.
						
							</p><p id="ii_3-p6">So this Smerdyakov became Fyodor Pavlovitch's second servant,
						
						and was living in the lodge with Grigory and Marfa at the time our
						
						story begins. He was employed as cook. I ought to say something of
						
						this Smerdyakov, but I am ashamed of keeping my readers' attention
						
						so long occupied with these common menials, and I will go back to my
						
						story, hoping to say more of Smerdyakov in the course of it.</p>					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - The Confession of a Passionate Heart- in Verse" prev="ii_3" next="iv_2" id="iii_3">
					
						<p id="iii_3-p1">ALYOSHA remained for some time irresolute after hearing the
						
						command his father shouted to him from the carriage. But in spite of
						
						his uneasiness he did not stand still. That was not his way. He went
						
						at once to the kitchen to find out what his father had been doing
						
						above. Then he set off, trusting that on the way he would find some
						
						answer to the doubt tormenting him. I hasten to add that his
						
						father's shouts, commanding him to return home "with his mattress
						
						and pillow" did not frighten him in the least. He understood perfectly
						
						that those peremptory shouts were merely "a flourish" to produce an
						
						effect. In the same way a tradesman in our town who was celebrating
						
						his name-day with a party of friends, getting angry at being refused
						
						more vodka, smashed up his own crockery and furniture and tore his own
						
						and his wife's clothes, and finally broke his windows, all for the
						
						sake of effect. Next day, of course, when he was sober, he regretted
						
						the broken cups and saucers. Alyosha knew that his father would let
						
						him go back to the monastery next day, possibly even that evening.
						
						Moreover, he was fully persuaded that his father might hurt anyone
						
						else, but would not hurt him. Alyosha was certain that no one in the
						
						whole world ever would want to hurt him, and, what is more, he knew
						
						that no one could hurt him. This was for him an axiom, assumed once
						
						for all without question, and he went his way without hesitation,
						
						relying on it.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p2">But at that moment an anxiety of sort disturbed him, and worried
						
						him the more because he could not formulate it. It was the fear of a
						
						woman, of Katerina Ivanovna, who had so urgently entreated him in
						
						the note handed to him by Madame Hohlakov to come and see her about
						
						something. This request and the necessity of going had at once aroused
						
						an uneasy feeling in his heart, and this feeling had grown more and
						
						more painful all the morning in spite of the scenes at the hermitage
						
						and at the Father Superior's. He was not uneasy because he did not
						
						know what she would speak of and what he must answer. And he was not
						
						afraid of her simply as a woman. Though he knew little of women, he
						
						spent his life, from early childhood till he entered the monastery,
						
						entirely with women. He was afraid of that woman, Katerina Ivanovna.
						
						He had been afraid of her from the first time he saw her. He had
						
						only seen her two or three times, and had only chanced to say a few
						
						words to her. He thought of her as a beautiful, proud, imperious girl.
						
						It was not her beauty which troubled him, but something else. And
						
						the vagueness of his apprehension increased the apprehension itself.
						
						The girl's aims were of the noblest, he knew that. She was trying to
						
						save his brother Dmitri simply through generosity, though he had
						
						already behaved badly to her. Yet, although Alyosha recognised and did
						
						justice to all these fine and generous sentiments, a shiver began to
						
						run down his back as soon as he drew near her house.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p3">He reflected that he would not find Ivan, who was so intimate a
						
						friend, with her, for Ivan was certainly now with his father. Dmitri
						
						he was even more certain not to find there, and he had a foreboding of
						
						the reason. And so his conversation would be with her alone. He had
						
						a great longing to run and see his brother Dmitri before that
						
						fateful interview. Without showing him the letter, he could talk to
						
						him about it. But Dmitri lived a long way off, and he was sure to be
						
						away from home too. Standing still for a minute, he reached a final
						
						decision. Crossing himself with a rapid and accustomed gesture, and at
						
						once smiling, he turned resolutely in the direction of his terrible
						
						lady.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p4">He knew her house. If he went by the High Street and then across
						
						the market-place, it was a long way round. Though our town is small,
						
						it is scattered, and the houses are far apart. And meanwhile his
						
						father was expecting him, and perhaps had not yet forgotten his
						
						command. He might be unreasonable, and so he had to make haste to
						
						get there and back. So he decided to take a short cut by the
						
						backway, for he knew every inch of the ground. This meant skirting
						
						fences, climbing over hurdles, and crossing other people's back-yards,
						
						where everyone he met knew him and greeted him. In this way he could
						
						reach the High Street in half the time.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p5">He had to pass the garden adjoining his father's, and belonging to
						
						a little tumbledown house with four windows. The owner of this
						
						house, as Alyosha knew, was a bedridden old woman, living with her
						
						daughter, who had been a genteel maid-servant in generals' families in
						
						Petersburg. Now she had been at home a year, looking after her sick
						
						mother. She always dressed up in fine clothes, though her old mother
						
						and she had sunk into such poverty that they went every day to
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch's kitchen for soup and bread, which Marfa gave
						
						readily. Yet, though the young woman came up for soup, she had never
						
						sold any of her dresses, and one of these even had a long train- a
						
						fact which Alyosha had learned from Rakitin, who always knew
						
						everything that was going on in the town. He had forgotten it as
						
						soon as he heard it, but now, on reaching the garden, he remembered
						
						the dress with the train, raised his head, which had been bowed in
						
						thought, and came upon something quite unexpected.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p6">Over the hurdle in the garden, Dmitri, mounted on something, was
						
						leaning forward, gesticulating violently, beckoning to him,
						
						obviously afraid to utter a word for fear of being overheard.
						
						Alyosha ran up to the hurdle.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p7">"It's a good thing you looked up. I was nearly shouting to you,"
						
						Mitya said in a joyful, hurried whisper. "Climb in here quickly! How
						
						splendid that you've come! I was just thinking of you"
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p8">Alyosha was delighted too, but he did not know how to get over the
						
						hurdle. Mitya put his powerful hand under his elbow to help him
						
						jump. Tucking up his cassock, Alyosha leapt over the hurdle with the
						
						agility of a bare-legged street urchin.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p9">"Well done! Now come along," said Mitya in an enthusiastic
						
						whisper.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p10">"Where?" whispered Alyosha, looking about him and finding
						
						himself in a deserted garden with no one near but themselves. The
						
						garden was small, but the house was at least fifty paces away.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p11">"There's no one here. Why do you whisper?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p12">"Why do I whisper? Deuce take it" cried Dmitri at the top of his
						
						voice. "You see what silly tricks nature plays one. I am here in
						
						secret, and on the watch. I'll explain later on, but, knowing it's a
						
						secret, I began whispering like a fool, when there's no need. Let us
						
						go. Over there. Till then be quiet. I want to kiss you.</p><p id="iii_3-p13" /><p id="iii_3-p14" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p15">Glory to God in the world,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p16">Glory to God in me...</p>
						
						
						
						<p id="iii_3-p17" /><p id="iii_3-p18" /><p id="iii_3-p19">I was just repeating that, sitting here, before you came."
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p20">The garden was about three acres in extent, and planted with trees
						
						only along the fence at the four sides. There were apple-trees,
						
						maples, limes and birch-trees. The middle of the garden was an empty
						
						grass space, from which several hundredweight of hay was carried in
						
						the summer. The garden was let out for a few roubles for the summer.
						
						There were also plantations of raspberries and currants and
						
						gooseberries laid out along the sides; a kitchen garden had been
						
						planted lately near the house.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p21">Dmitri led his brother to the most secluded corner of the
						
						garden. There, in a thicket of lime-trees and old bushes of black
						
						currant, elder, snowball-tree, and lilac, there stood a tumbledown
						
						green summer-house; blackened with age. Its walls were of
						
						lattice-work, but there was still a roof which could give shelter. God
						
						knows when this summer-house was built. There was a tradition that
						
						it had been put up some fifty years before by a retired colonel called
						
						von Schmidt, who owned the house at that time. It was all in decay,
						
						the floor was rotting, the planks were loose, the woodwork smelled
						
						musty. In the summer-house there was a green wooden table fixed in the
						
						ground, and round it were some green benches upon which it was still
						
						possible to sit. Alyosha had at once observed his brother's
						
						exhilarated condition, and on entering the arbour he saw half a bottle
						
						of brandy and a wineglass on the table.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p22">"That's brandy," Mitya laughed. "I see your look: 'He's drinking
						
						again" Distrust the apparition.</p><p id="iii_3-p23" /><p id="iii_3-p24" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p25">Distrust the worthless, lying crowd,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p26">And lay aside thy doubts.</p>
						
						
						
						<p id="iii_3-p27" /><p id="iii_3-p28" /><p id="iii_3-p29">I'm not drinking, I'm only 'indulging,' as that pig, your Rakitin,
						
						says. He'll be a civil councillor one day, but he'll always talk about
						
						'indulging.' Sit down. I could take you in my arms, Alyosha, and press
						
						you to my bosom till I crush you, for in the whole world- in
						
						reality- in real-i-ty- (can you take it in?) I love no one but you!
						
						</p><p id="iii_3-p30"> He uttered the last words in a sort of exaltation.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p31">"No one but you and one 'jade' I have fallen in love with, to my
						
						ruin. But being in love doesn't mean loving. You may be in love with a
						
						woman and yet hate her. Remember that! I can talk about it gaily
						
						still. Sit down here by the table and I'll sit beside you and look
						
						at you, and go on talking. You shall keep quiet and I'll go on
						
						talking, for the time has come. But on reflection, you know, I'd
						
						better speak quietly, for here- here- you can never tell what ears are
						
						listening. I will explain everything; as they say, 'the story will
						
						be continued.' Why have I been longing for you? Why have I been
						
						thirsting for you all these days, and just now? (It's five days
						
						since I've cast anchor here.) Because it's only to you I can tell
						
						everything; because I must, because I need you, because to-morrow I
						
						shall fly from the clouds, because to-morrow life is ending and
						
						beginning. Have you ever felt, have you ever dreamt of falling down
						
						a precipice into a pit? That's just how I'm falling, but not in a
						
						dream. And I'm not afraid, and don't you be afraid. At least, I am
						
						afraid, but I enjoy it. It's not enjoyment though, but ecstasy. Damn
						
						it all, whatever it is! A strong spirit, a weak spirit, a womanish
						
						spirit- what, ever it is! Let us praise nature: you see what sunshine,
						
						how clear the sky is, the leaves are all green, it's still summer;
						
						four o'clock in the afternoon and the stillness! Where were you
						
						going?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p32">"I was going to father's, but I meant to go to Katerina Ivanovna's
						
						first."
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p33">"To her, and to father! Oo! what a coincidence! Why was I
						
						waiting for you? Hungering and thirsting for you in every cranny of my
						
						soul and even in my ribs? Why, to send you to father and to her,
						
						Katerina Ivanovna, so as to have done with her and with father. To
						
						send an angel. I might have sent anyone, but I wanted to send an
						
						angel. And here you are on your way to see father and her."
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p34">"Did you really mean to send me?" cried Alyosha with a
						
						distressed expression.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p35">"Stay! You knew it And I see you understand it all at once. But be
						
						quiet, be quiet for a time. Don't be sorry, and don't cry."
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p36">Dmitri stood up, thought a moment, and put his finger to his
						
						forehead.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p37">"She's asked you, written to you a letter or something, that's why
						
						you're going to her? You wouldn't be going except for that?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p38">"Here is her note." Alyosha took it out of his pocket. Mitya
						
						looked through it quickly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p39">"And you were going the backway! Oh, gods, I thank you for sending
						
						him by the backway, and he came to me like the golden fish to the
						
						silly old fishermen in the fable! Listen, Alyosha, listen, brother!
						
						Now I mean to tell you everything, for I must tell someone. An angel
						
						in heaven I've told already; but I want to tell an angel on earth. You
						
						are an angel on earth. You will hear and judge and forgive. And that's
						
						what I need, that someone above me should forgive. Listen! If two
						
						people break away from everything on earth and fly off into the
						
						unknown, or at least one of them, and before flying off or going to
						
						ruin he comes to someone else and says, 'Do this for me'- some
						
						favour never asked before that could only be asked on one's
						
						deathbed- would that other refuse, if he were a friend or a brother?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p40">"I will do it, but tell me what it is, and make haste," said
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p41">"Make haste! H'm!... Don't be in a hurry, Alyosha, you hurry and
						
						worry yourself. There's no need to hurry now. Now the world has
						
						taken a new turning. Ah, Alyosha, what a pity you can't understand
						
						ecstasy. But what am I saying to him? As though you didn't
						
						understand it. What an ass I am! What am I saying? 'Be noble, O man!'-
						
						who says that?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p42">Alyosha made up his mind to wait. He felt that, perhaps, indeed,
						
						his work lay here. Mitya sank into thought for a moment, with his
						
						elbow on the table and his head in his hand. Both were silent.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p43">"Alyosha," said Mitya, "you're the only one who won't laugh. I
						
						should like to begin- my confession- with Schiller's Hymn to Joy, An
						
						die Freude! I don't know German, I only know it's called that. Don't
						
						think I'm talking nonsense because I'm drunk. I'm not a bit drunk.
						
						Brandy's all very well, but I need two bottles to make me drunk:</p><p id="iii_3-p44" /><p id="iii_3-p45" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p46">Silenus with his rosy phiz</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p47">Upon his stumbling ass.</p>
						
						
						
						   <p id="iii_3-p48" /><p id="iii_3-p49" /><p id="iii_3-p50">But I've not drunk a quarter of a bottle, and I'm not Silenus. I'm
						
						not Silenus, though I am strong,* for I've made a decision once for
						
						all. Forgive me the pun; you'll have to forgive me a lot more than
						
						puns to-day. Don't be uneasy. I'm not spinning it out. I'm talking
						
						sense, and I'll come to the point in a minute. I won't keep you in
						
						suspense. Stay, how does it go?"
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iii_3-p51"> * In Russian, silen.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p52">He raised his head, thought a minute, and began with enthusiasm:</p><p id="iii_3-p53" /><p id="iii_3-p54" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p55">Wild and fearful in his cavern</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p56">Hid the naked troglodyte,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p57">And the homeless nomad wandered</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p58">Laying waste the fertile plain.</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p59">Menacing with spear and arrow</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p60">In the woods the hunter strayed....</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p61">Woe to all poor wretches stranded</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p62">On those cruel and hostile shores!</p>
						
											<p id="iii_3-p63" /><p id="iii_3-p64" />
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p65">From the peak of high Olympus</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p66">Came the mother Ceres down,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p67">Seeking in those savage regions</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p68">Her lost daughter Proserpine.</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p69">But the Goddess found no refuge,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p70">Found no kindly welcome there,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p71">And no temple bearing witness</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p72">To the worship of the gods.</p>
						
											<p id="iii_3-p73" /><p id="iii_3-p74" />
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p75">From the fields and from the vineyards</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p76">Came no fruits to deck the feasts,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p77">Only flesh of bloodstained victims</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p78">Smouldered on the altar-fires,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p79">And where'er the grieving goddess</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p80">Turns her melancholy gaze,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p81">Sunk in vilest degradation</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p82">Man his loathsomeness displays</p>
						
						
						
							<p id="iii_3-p83" /><p id="iii_3-p84" /><p id="iii_3-p85">Mitya broke into sobs and seized Alyosha's hand.
						
							</p><p id="iii_3-p86">"My dear, my dear, in degradation, in degradation now, too.
						
						There's a terrible amount of suffering for man on earth, a terrible
						
						lot of trouble. Don't think I'm only a brute in an officer's
						
						uniform, wallowing in dirt and drink. I hardly think of anything but
						
						of that degraded man- if only I'm not lying. I pray God I'm not
						
						lying and showing off. I think about that man because I am that man
						
						myself.</p><p id="iii_3-p87" /><p id="iii_3-p88" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p89">Would he purge his soul from vileness</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p90">And attain to light and worth,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p91">He must turn and cling for ever</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p92">To his ancient Mother Earth.</p>
						
						
						
							<p id="iii_3-p93" /><p id="iii_3-p94" /><p id="iii_3-p95">But the difficulty is how am I to cling for ever to Mother
						
						Earth. I don't kiss her. I don't cleave to her bosom. Am I to become a
						
						peasant or a shepherd? I go on and I don't know whether I'm going to
						
						shame or to light and joy. That's the trouble, for everything in the
						
						world is a riddle! And whenever I've happened to sink into the
						
						vilest degradation (and it's always been happening) I always read that
						
						poem about Ceres and man. Has it reformed me? Never! For I'm a
						
						Karamazov. For when I do leap into the pit, I go headlong with my
						
						heels up, and am pleased to be falling in that degrading attitude, and
						
						pride myself upon it. And in the very depths of that degradation I
						
						begin a hymn of praise. Let me be accursed. Let me be vile and base,
						
						only let me kiss the hem of the veil in which my God is shrouded.
						
						Though I may be following the devil, I am Thy son, O Lord, and I
						
						love Thee, and I feel the joy without which the world cannot stand.</p><p id="iii_3-p96" /><p id="iii_3-p97" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p98">Joy everlasting fostereth</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p99">The soul of all creation,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p100">It is her secret ferment fires</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p101">The cup of life with flame.</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p102">'Tis at her beck the grass hath turned</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p103">Each blade towards the light</p>
						
										  <p class="center" id="iii_3-p104">And solar systems have evolved</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p105">From chaos and dark night,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p106">Filling the realms of boundless space</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p107">Beyond the sage's sight.</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p108">At bounteous Nature's kindly breast,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p109">All things that breathe drink Joy,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p110">And birds and beasts and creeping things</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p111">All follow where She leads.</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p112">Her gifts to man are friends in need,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p113">The wreath, the foaming must,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p114">To angels- vision of God's throne,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p115">To insects- sensual lust.</p>
						
						
						
							<p id="iii_3-p116" /><p id="iii_3-p117" /><p id="iii_3-p118">But enough poetry! I am in tears; let me cry. It may be
						
						foolishness that everyone would laugh at. But you won't laugh. Your
						
						eyes are shining, too. Enough poetry. I want to tell you now about the
						
						insects to whom God gave 'sensual lust.'</p><p id="iii_3-p119" /><p id="iii_3-p120" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="iii_3-p121">To insects- sensual lust.</p>
						
						
						
							<p id="iii_3-p122" /><p id="iii_3-p123" /><p id="iii_3-p124">I am that insect, brother, and it is said of me specially. All
						
						we Karamazovs are such insects, and, angel as you are, that insect
						
						lives in you, too, and will stir up a tempest in your blood. Tempests,
						
						because sensual lust is a tempest worse than a tempest! Beauty is a
						
						terrible and awful thing! It is terrible because it has not been
						
						fathomed and never can be fathomed, for God sets us nothing but
						
						riddles. Here the boundaries meet and all contradictions exist side by
						
						side. I am a cultivated man, brother, but I've thought a lot about
						
						this. It's terrible what mysteries there are! Too many riddles weigh
						
						men down on earth. We must solve them as we can, and try to keep a dry
						
						skin in the water. Beauty! I can't endure the thought that a man of
						
						lofty mind and heart begins with the ideal of the Madonna and ends
						
						with the ideal of Sodom. What's still more awful is that a man with
						
						the ideal of Sodom in his soul does not renounce the ideal of the
						
						Madonna, and his heart may be on fire with that ideal, genuinely on
						
						fire, just as in his days of youth and innocence. Yes, man is broad,
						
						too broad, indeed. I'd have him narrower. The devil only knows what to
						
						make of it! What to the mind is shameful is beauty and nothing else to
						
						the heart. Is there beauty in Sodom? Believe me, that for the
						
						immense mass of mankind beauty is found in Sodom. Did you know that
						
						secret? The awful thing is that beauty is mysterious as well as
						
						terrible. God and the devil are fighting there and the battlefield
						
						is the heart of man. But a man always talks of his own ache. Listen,
						
						now to come to facts."</p>					
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - The Confession of a Passionate Heart- In Anecdote" prev="iii_3" next="v_2" id="iv_2">
					
					
						<p id="iv_2-p1">"I was leading a wild life then. Father said just now that I spent
						
						several thousand roubles in seducing young girls. That's a swinish
						
						invention, and there was nothing of the sort. And if there was, I
						
						didn't need money simply for that. With me money is an accessory,
						
						the overflow of my heart, the framework. To-day she would be my
						
						lady, to-morrow a wench out of the streets in her place. I entertained
						
						them both. I threw away money by the handful on music, rioting, and
						
						Gypsies. Sometimes I gave it to the ladies, too, for they'll take it
						
						greedily, that must be admitted, and be pleased and thankful for it.
						
						Ladies used to be fond of me: not all of them, but it happened, it
						
						happened. But I always liked side-paths, little dark back-alleys
						
						behind the main road- there one finds adventures and surprises, and
						
						precious metal in the dirt. I am speaking figuratively, brother. In
						
						the town I was in, there were no such back-alleys in the literal
						
						sense, but morally there were. If you were like me, you'd know what
						
						that means. I loved vice, I loved the ignominy of vice. I loved
						
						cruelty; am I not a bug, am I not a noxious insect? In fact a
						
						Karamazov! Once we went, a whole lot of us, for a picnic, in seven
						
						sledges. It was dark, it was winter, and I began squeezing a girl's
						
						hand, and forced her to kiss me. She was the daughter of an
						
						official, a sweet, gentle, submissive creature. She allowed me, she
						
						allowed me much in the dark. She thought, poor thing, that I should
						
						come next day to make her an offer (I was looked upon as a good match,
						
						too). But I didn't say a word to her for five months. I used to see
						
						her in a corner at dances (we were always having dances), her eyes
						
						watching me. I saw how they glowed with fire- a fire of gentle
						
						indignation. This game only tickled that insect lust I cherished in my
						
						soul. Five months later she married an official and left the town,
						
						still angry, and still, perhaps, in love with me. Now they live
						
						happily. Observe that I told no one. I didn't boast of it. Though
						
						I'm full of low desires, and love what's low, I'm not dishonourable.
						
						You're blushing; your eyes flashed. Enough of this filth with you. And
						
						all this was nothing much- wayside blossoms a la Paul de Kock-
						
						though the cruel insect had already grown strong in my soul. I've a
						
						perfect album of reminiscences, brother. God bless them, the darlings.
						
						I tried to break it off without quarrelling. And I never gave them
						
						away, I never bragged of one of them. But that's enough. You can't
						
						suppose I brought you here simply to talk of such nonsense. No, I'm
						
						going to tell you something more curious; and don't be surprised
						
						that I'm glad to tell you, instead of being ashamed."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p2">"You say that because I blushed," Alyosha said suddenly. "I wasn't
						
						blushing at what you were saying or at what you've done. I blushed
						
						because I am the same as you are."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p3">"You? Come, that's going a little too far!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p4">"No, it's not too far," said Alyosha warmly (obviously the idea
						
						was not a new one). "The ladder's the same. I'm at the bottom step,
						
						and you're above, somewhere about the thirteenth. That's how I see it.
						
						But it's all the same. Absolutely the same in kind. Anyone on the
						
						bottom step is bound to go up to the top one."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p5">"Then one ought not to step on at all."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p6">"Anyone who can help it had better not."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p7">"But can you?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p8">"I think not."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p9">"Hush, Alyosha, hush, darling! I could kiss your hand, you touch
						
						me so. That rogue Grushenka has an eye for men. She told me once
						
						that she'd devour you one day. There, there, I won't! From this
						
						field of corruption fouled by flies, let's pass to my tragedy, also
						
						befouled by flies, that is, by every sort of vileness. Although the
						
						old man told lies about my seducing innocence, there really was
						
						something of the sort in my tragedy, though it was only once, and then
						
						it did not come off. The old man who has reproached me with what never
						
						happened does not even know of this fact; I never told anyone about
						
						it. You're the first, except Ivan, of course- Ivan knows everything.
						
						He knew about it long before you. But Ivan's a tomb."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p10">"Ivan's a tomb?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p11">Alyosha listened with great attention.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p12">"I was lieutenant in a line regiment, but still I was under
						
						supervision, like a kind of convict. Yet I was awfully well received
						
						in the little town. I spent money right and left. I was thought to
						
						be rich; I thought so myself. But I must have pleased them in other
						
						ways as well. Although they shook their heads over me, they liked
						
						me. My colonel, who was an old man, took a sudden dislike to me. He
						
						was always down upon me, but I had powerful friends, and, moreover,
						
						all the town was on my side, so he couldn't do me much harm. I was
						
						in fault myself for refusing to treat him with proper respect. I was
						
						proud. This obstinate old fellow, who was really a very good sort,
						
						kind-hearted and hospitable, had had two wives, both dead. His first
						
						wife, who was of a humble family, left a daughter as unpretentious
						
						as herself. She was a young woman of four and twenty when I was there,
						
						and was living with her father and an aunt, her mother's sister. The
						
						aunt was simple and illiterate; the niece was simple but lively. I
						
						like to say nice things about people. I never knew a woman of more
						
						charming character than Agafya- fancy, her name was Agafya Ivanovna!
						
						And she wasn't bad-looking either, in the Russian style: tall,
						
						stout, with a full figure, and beautiful eyes, though a rather
						
						coarse face. She had not married, although she had had two suitors.
						
						She refused them, but was as cheerful as ever. I was intimate with
						
						her, not in 'that' way, it was pure friendship. I have often been
						
						friendly with women quite innocently. I used to talk to her with
						
						shocking frankness, and she only laughed. Many woman like such
						
						freedom, and she was a girl too, which made it very amusing. Another
						
						thing, one could never think of her as a young lady. She and her
						
						aunt lived in her father's house with a sort of voluntary humility,
						
						not putting themselves on an equality with other people. She was a
						
						general favourite, and of use of everyone, for she was a clever
						
						dressmaker. She had a talent for it. She gave her services freely
						
						without asking for payment, but if anyone offered her payment, she
						
						didn't refuse. The colonel, of course, was a very different matter. He
						
						was one of the chief personages in the district. He kept open house,
						
						entertained the whole town, gave suppers and dances. At the time I
						
						arrived and joined the battalion, all the town was talking of the
						
						expected return of the colonel's second daughter, a great beauty,
						
						who had just left a fashionable school in the capital. This second
						
						daughter is Katerina Ivanovna, and she was the child of the second
						
						wife, who belonged to a distinguished general's family; although, as I
						
						learnt on good authority, she too brought the colonel no money. She
						
						had connections, and that was all. There may have been expectations,
						
						but they had come to nothing.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p13">"Yet, when the young lady came from boarding-school on a visit,
						
						the whole town revived. Our most distinguished ladies- two
						
						'Excellencies' and a colonel's wife- and all the rest following
						
						their lead, at once took her up and gave entertainments in her honour.
						
						She was the belle of the balls and picnics, and they got up tableaux
						
						vivants in aid of distressed governesses. I took no notice, I went
						
						on as wildly as before, and one of my exploits at the time set all the
						
						town talking. I saw her eyes taking my measure one evening at the
						
						battery commander's, but I didn't go up to her, as though I
						
						disdained her acquaintance. I did go up and speak to her at an evening
						
						party not long after. She scarcely looked at me, and compressed her
						
						lips scornfully. 'Wait a bit. I'll have my revenge,' thought I. I
						
						behaved like an awful fool on many occasions at that time, and I was
						
						conscious of it myself. What made it worse was that I felt that
						
						'Katenka' was not an innocent boarding-school miss, but a person of
						
						character, proud and really high-principled; above all, she had
						
						education and intellect, and I had neither. You think I meant to
						
						make her an offer? No, I simply wanted to revenge myself, because I
						
						was such a hero and she didn't seem to feel it.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p14">"Meanwhile, I spent my time in drink and riot, till the
						
						lieutenant-colonel put me under arrest for three days. Just at that
						
						time father sent me six thousand roubles in return for my sending
						
						him a deed giving up all claims upon him- settling our accounts, so to
						
						speak, and saying that I wouldn't expect anything more. I didn't
						
						understand a word of it at the time. Until I came here, Alyosha,
						
						till the last few days, indeed, perhaps even now, I haven't been
						
						able to make head or tail of my money affairs with father. But never
						
						mind that, we'll talk of it later.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p15">"Just as I received the money, I got a letter from a friend
						
						telling me something that interested me immensely. The authorities,
						
						I learnt, were dissatisfied with our lieutenant-colonel. He was
						
						suspected of irregularities; in fact, his enemies were preparing a
						
						surprise for him. And then the commander of the division arrived,
						
						and kicked up the devil of a shindy. Shortly afterwards he was ordered
						
						to retire. I won't tell you how it all happened. He had enemies
						
						certainly. Suddenly there was a marked coolness in the town towards
						
						him and all his family. His friends all turned their backs on him.
						
						Then I took my first step. I met Agafya Ivanovna, with whom I'd always
						
						kept up a friendship, and said, 'Do you know there's a deficit of 4500
						
						roubles of government money in your father's accounts?'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p16">"'What do you mean? What makes you say so? The general was here
						
						not long ago, and everything was all right.'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p17">"'Then it was, but now it isn't.'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p18">"She was terribly scared.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p19">"'Don't frighten me!' she said. 'Who told you so?'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p20">"'Don't be uneasy,' I said, 'I won't tell anyone. You know I'm
						
						as silent as the tomb. I only wanted, in view of "possibilities," to
						
						add, that when they demand that 4500 roubles from your father, and
						
						he can't produce it, he'll be tried, and made to serve as a common
						
						soldier in his old age, unless you like to send me your young lady
						
						secretly. I've just had money paid me. I'll give her four thousand, if
						
						you like, and keep the secret religiously.'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p21">"'Ah, you scoundrel!'- that's what she said. 'You wicked
						
						scoundrel! How dare you!'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p22">"She went away furiously indignant, while I shouted after her once
						
						more that the secret should be kept sacred. Those two simple
						
						creatures, Agafya and her aunt, I may as well say at once, behaved
						
						like perfect angels all through this business. They genuinely adored
						
						their 'Katya,' thought her far above them, and waited on her, hand and
						
						foot. But Agafya told her of our conversation. I found that out
						
						afterwards. She didn't keep it back, and of course that was all I
						
						wanted.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p23">"Suddenly the new major arrived to take command of the
						
						battalion. The old lieutenant-colonel was taken ill at once,
						
						couldn't leave his room for two days, and didn't hand over the
						
						government money. Dr. Kravchenko declared that he really was ill.
						
						But I knew for a fact, and had known for a long time, that for the
						
						last four years the money had never been in his hands except when
						
						the Commander made his visits of inspection. He used to lend it to a
						
						trustworthy person, a merchant of our town called Trifonov, an old
						
						widower, with a big beard and gold-rimmed spectacles. He used to go to
						
						the fair, do a profitable business with the money, and return the
						
						whole sum to the colonel, bringing with it a present from the fair, as
						
						well as interest on the loan. But this time (I heard all about it
						
						quite by chance from Trifonov's son and heir, a drivelling youth and
						
						one of the most vicious in the world)- this time, I say, Trifonov
						
						brought nothing back from the fair. The lieutenant-colonel flew to
						
						him. 'I've never received any money from you, and couldn't possibly
						
						have received any.' That was all the answer he got. So now our
						
						lieutenant-colonel is confined to the house, with a towel round his
						
						head, while they're all three busy putting ice on it. All at once an
						
						orderly arrives on the scene with the book and the order to 'hand over
						
						the battalion money immediately, within two hours.' He signed the book
						
						(I saw the signature in the book afterwards), stood up, saying he
						
						would put on his uniform, ran to his bedroom, loaded his
						
						double-barrelled gun with a service bullet, took the boot off his
						
						right foot, fixed the gun against his chest, and began feeling for the
						
						trigger with his foot. But Agafya, remembering what I had told her,
						
						had her suspicions. She stole up and peeped into the room just in
						
						time. She rushed in, flung herself upon him from behind, threw her
						
						arms round him, and the gun went off, hit the ceiling, but hurt no
						
						one. The others ran in, took away the gun, and held him by the arms. I
						
						heard all about this afterwards. I was at home, it was getting dusk,
						
						and I was just preparing to go out. I had dressed, brushed my hair,
						
						scented my handkerchief, and taken up my cap, when suddenly the door
						
						opened, and facing me in the room stood Katerina Ivanovna.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p24">"It's strange how things happen sometimes. No one had seen her
						
						in the street, so that no one knew of it in the town. I lodged with
						
						two decrepit old ladies, who looked after me. They were most
						
						obliging old things, ready to do anything for me, and at my request
						
						were as silent afterwards as two cast-iron posts. Of course I
						
						grasped the position at once. She walked in and looked straight at me,
						
						her dark eyes determined, even defiant, but on her lips and round
						
						mouth I saw uncertainty.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p25">"'My sister told me,' she began, 'that you would give me 4500
						
						roubles if I came to you for it- myself. I have come... give me the
						
						money!'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p26">"She couldn't keep it up. She was breathless, frightened, her
						
						voice failed her, and the corners of her mouth and the lines round
						
						it quivered. Alyosha, are you listening, or are you asleep?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p27">"Mitya, I know you will tell the whole truth, said Alyosha in
						
						agitation.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p28">"I am telling it. If I tell the whole truth just as it happened
						
						I shan't spare myself. My first idea was a- Karamazov one. Once I
						
						was bitten by a centipede, brother, and laid up a fortnight with fever
						
						from it. Well, I felt a centipede biting at my heart then- a noxious
						
						insect, you understand? I looked her up and down. You've seen her?
						
						She's a beauty. But she was beautiful in another way then. At that
						
						moment she was beautiful because she was noble, and I was a scoundrel;
						
						she in all the grandeur of her generosity and sacrifice for her
						
						father, and I- a bug! And, scoundrel as I was, she was altogether at
						
						my mercy, body and soul. She was hemmed in. I tell you frankly, that
						
						thought, that venomous thought, so possessed my heart that it almost
						
						swooned with suspense. It seemed as if there could be no resisting it;
						
						as though I should act like a bug, like a venomous spider, without a
						
						spark of pity. I could scarcely breathe. Understand, I should have
						
						gone next day to ask for her hand, so that it might end honourably, so
						
						to speak, and that nobody would or could know. For though I'm a man of
						
						base desires, I'm honest. And at that very second some voice seemed to
						
						whisper in my ear, 'But when you come to-morrow to make your proposal,
						
						that girl won't even see you; she'll order her coachman to kick you
						
						out of the yard. "Publish it through all the town," she would say,
						
						"I'm not afraid of you." 'I looked at the young lady, my voice had not
						
						deceived me. That is how it would be, not a doubt of it. I could see
						
						from her face now that I should be turned out of the house. My spite
						
						was roused. I longed to play her the nastiest swinish cad's trick:
						
						to look at her with a sneer, and on the spot where she stood before me
						
						to stun her with a tone of voice that only a shopman could use.
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p29">"'Four thousand! What do you mean? I was joking. You've been
						
						counting your chickens too easily, madam. Two hundred, if you like,
						
						with all my heart. But four thousand is not a sum to throw away on
						
						such frivolity. You've put yourself out to no purpose.'
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p30">"I should have lost the game, of course. She'd have run away.
						
						But it would have been an infernal revenge. It would have been worth
						
						it all. I'd have howled with regret all the rest of my life, only to
						
						have played that trick. Would you believe it, it has never happened to
						
						me with any other woman, not one, to look at her at such a moment with
						
						hatred. But, on my oath, I looked at her for three seconds, or five
						
						perhaps, with fearful hatred- that hate which is only a hair's-breadth
						
						from love, from the maddest love!
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p31">"I went to the window, put my forehead against the frozen pane,
						
						and I remember the ice burnt my forehead like fire. I did not keep her
						
						long, don't be afraid. I turned round, went up to the table, opened
						
						the drawer and took out a banknote for five thousand roubles (it was
						
						lying in a French dictionary). Then I showed it her in silence, folded
						
						it, handed it to her, opened the door into the passage, and,
						
						stepping back, made her a deep bow. a most respectful, a most
						
						impressive bow, believe me! She shuddered all over, gazed at me for
						
						a second, turned horribly pale-white as a sheet, in fact- and all at
						
						once, not impetuously but softly, gently, bowed down to my feet- not a
						
						boarding-school curtsey, but a Russian bow, with her forehead to the
						
						floor. She jumped up and ran away. I was wearing my sword. I drew it
						
						and nearly stabbed myself with it on the spot; why, I don't know. It
						
						would have been frightfully stupid, of course. I suppose it was from
						
						delight. Can you understand that one might kill oneself from
						
						delight? But I didn't stab myself. I only kissed my sword and put it
						
						back in the scabbard- which there was no need to have told you, by the
						
						way. And I fancy that in telling you about my inner conflict I have
						
						laid it on rather thick to glorify myself. But let it pass, and to
						
						hell with all who pry into the human heart! Well, so much for that
						
						'adventure' with Katerina Ivanovna. So now Ivan knows of it, and
						
						you- no one else."
						
							</p><p id="iv_2-p32">Dmitri got up, took a step or two in his excitement, pulled out
						
						his handkerchief and mopped his forehead, then sat down again, not
						
						in the same place as before, but on the opposite side, so that Alyosha
						
						had to turn quite round to face him.</p>
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - The Confession of a Passionate Heart- Heels Up" prev="iv_2" next="vi_1" id="v_2">
					
							<p id="v_2-p1">"NOW," said Alyosha, "I understand the first half."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p2">"You understand the first half. That half is a drama, and it was
						
						played out there. The second half is a tragedy, and it is being
						
						acted here."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p3">"And I understand nothing of that second half so far," said
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p4">"And I? Do you suppose I understand it?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p5">"Stop, Dmitri. There's one important question. Tell me, you were
						
						betrothed, betrothed still?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p6">"We weren't betrothed at once, not for three months after that
						
						adventure. The next day I told myself that the incident was closed,
						
						concluded, that there would be no sequel. It seemed to me caddish to
						
						make her an offer. On her side she gave no sign of life for the six
						
						weeks that she remained in the town; except, indeed, for one action.
						
						The day after her visit the maid-servant slipped round with an
						
						envelope addressed to me. I tore it open; it contained the change
						
						out of the banknote. Only four thousand five hundred roubles was
						
						needed, but there was a discount of about two hundred on changing
						
						it. She only sent me about two hundred and sixty. I don't remember
						
						exactly, but not a note, not a word of explanation. I searched the
						
						packet for a pencil mark n-nothing! Well, I spent the rest of the
						
						money on such an orgy that the new major was obliged to reprimand me.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p7">"Well, the lieutenant-colonel produced the battalion money, to the
						
						astonishment of everyone, for nobody believed that he had the money
						
						untouched. He'd no sooner paid it than he fell ill, took to his bed,
						
						and, three weeks later, softening of the brain set in, and he died
						
						five days afterwards. He was buried with military honours, for he
						
						had not had time to receive his discharge. Ten days after his funeral,
						
						Katerina Ivanovna, with her aunt and sister, went to Moscow. And,
						
						behold, on the very day they went away (I hadn't seen them, didn't see
						
						them off or take leave) I received a tiny note, a sheet of thin blue
						
						paper, and on it only one line in pencil: 'I will write to you.
						
						Wait. K.' And that was all.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p8">"I'll explain the rest now, in two words. In Moscow their fortunes
						
						changed with the swiftness of lightning and the unexpectedness of an
						
						Arabian fairy-tale. That general's widow, their nearest relation,
						
						suddenly lost the two nieces who were her heiresses and next-of-kin-
						
						both died in the same week of small-pox. The old lady, prostrated with
						
						grief, welcomed Katya as a daughter, as her one hope, clutched at her,
						
						altered her will in Katya's favour. But that concerned the future.
						
						Meanwhile she gave her, for present use, eighty thousand roubles, as a
						
						marriage portion, to do what she liked with. She was an hysterical
						
						woman. I saw something of her in Moscow, later.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p9">"Well, suddenly I received by post four thousand five hundred
						
						roubles. I was speechless with surprise, as you may suppose. Three
						
						days later came the promised letter. I have it with me now. You must
						
						read it. She offers to be my wife, offers herself to me. 'I love you
						
						madly, she says, 'even if you don't love me, never mind. Be my
						
						husband. Don't be afraid. I won't hamper you in any way. I will be
						
						your chattel. I will be the carpet under your feet. I want to love you
						
						for ever. I want to save you from yourself.' Alyosha, I am not
						
						worthy to repeat those lines in my vulgar words and in my vulgar tone,
						
						my everlastingly vulgar tone, that I can never cure myself of. That
						
						letter stabs me even now. Do you think I don't mind- that I don't mind
						
						still? I wrote her an answer at once, as it was impossible for me to
						
						go to Moscow. I wrote to her with tears. One thing I shall be
						
						ashamed of for ever. I referred to her being rich and having a dowry
						
						while I was only a stuck-up beggar! I mentioned money! I ought to have
						
						borne it in silence, but it slipped from my pen. Then I wrote at
						
						once to Ivan, and told him all I could about it in a letter of six
						
						pages, and sent him to her. Why do you look like that? Why are you
						
						staring at me? Yes, Ivan fell in love with her; he's in love with
						
						her still. I know that. I did a stupid thing, in the world's
						
						opinion; but perhaps that one stupid thing may be the saving of us all
						
						now. Oo! Don't you see what a lot she thinks of Ivan, how she respects
						
						him? When she compares us, do you suppose she can love a man like
						
						me, especially after all that has happened here?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p10">"But I'm convinced that she does love a man like you, and not a
						
						man like him."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p11">"She loves her own virtue, not me." The words broke involuntarily,
						
						and almost malignantly, from Dmitri. He laughed, but a minute later
						
						his eyes gleamed, he flushed crimson and struck the table violently
						
						with his fist.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p12">"I swear, Alyosha," he cried, with intense and genuine anger at
						
						himself; "You may not believe me, but as God is Holy, and as Christ is
						
						God, I swear that though I smiled at her lofty sentiments just now,
						
						I know that I am a million times baser in soul than she, and that
						
						these lofty sentiments of hers are as sincere as a heavenly angel's.
						
						That's the tragedy of it- that I know that for certain. What if anyone
						
						does show off a bit? Don't I do it myself? And yet I'm sincere, I'm
						
						sincere. As for Ivan, I can understand how he must be cursing nature
						
						now with his intellect, too! To see the preference given- to whom,
						
						to what? To a monster who, though he is betrothed and all eyes are
						
						fixed on him, can't restrain his debaucheries- and before the very
						
						eyes of his betrothed! And a man like me is preferred, while he is
						
						rejected. And why? Because a girl wants to sacrifice her life and
						
						destiny out of gratitude. It's ridiculous! I've never said a word of
						
						this to Ivan, and Ivan of course has never dropped a hint of the
						
						sort to me. But destiny will be accomplished, and the best man will
						
						hold his ground while the undeserving one will vanish into his
						
						back-alley for ever- his filthy back-alley, his beloved back-alley,
						
						where he is at home and where he will sink in filth and stench at
						
						his own free will and with enjoyment. I've been talking foolishly.
						
						I've no words left. I used them at random, but it will be as I have
						
						said. I shall drown in the back-alley, and she will marry Ivan."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p13">"Stop, Dmitri," Alyosha interrupted again with great anxiety.
						
						"There's one thing you haven't made clear yet: you are still betrothed
						
						all the same, aren't you? How can you break off the engagement if she,
						
						your betrothed, doesn't want to?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p14">"Yes, formally and solemnly betrothed. It was all done on my
						
						arrival in Moscow, with great ceremony, with ikons, all in fine style.
						
						The general's wife blessed us, and- would you believe it?-
						
						congratulated Katya. You've made a good choice,' she said, 'I see
						
						right through him.' And- would you believe it?- she didn't like
						
						Ivan, and hardly greeted him. I had a lot of talk with Katya in
						
						Moscow. I told her about myself- sincerely, honourably. She listened
						
						to everything.</p><p id="v_2-p15" /><p id="v_2-p16" />
						
						
						
										   <p class="center" id="v_2-p17">There was sweet confusion,</p>
						
										   <p class="center" id="v_2-p18">There were tender words.</p>
						
						
						
						<p id="v_2-p19" /><p id="v_2-p20" /><p id="v_2-p21">Though there were proud words, too. She wrung out of me a mighty
						
						promise to reform. I gave my promise, and here- "
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p22">"What?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p23">"Why, I called to you and brought you out here to-day, this very
						
						day- remember it- to send you- this very day again- to Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, and- "
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p24">"To tell her that I shall never come to see her again. Say, 'He
						
						sends you his compliments.'"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p25">"But is that possible?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p26">"That's just the reason I'm sending you, in my place, because it's
						
						impossible. And, how could I tell her myself?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p27">"And where are you going?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p28">"To the back-alley."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p29">"To Grushenka, then!" Alyosha exclaimed mournfully, clasping his
						
						hands. "Can Rakitin really have told the truth? I thought that you had
						
						just visited her, and that was all."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p30">"Can a betrothed man pay such visits? Is such a thing possible and
						
						with such a betrothed, and before the eyes of all the world?
						
						Confound it, I have some honour! As soon as I began visiting
						
						Grushenka, I ceased to be betrothed, and to be an honest man. I
						
						understand that. Why do you look at me? You see, I went in the first
						
						place to beat her. I had heard, and I know for a fact now, that that
						
						captain, father's agent, had given Grushenka an I.O.U. of mine for her
						
						to sue me for payment, so as to put an end to me. They wanted to scare
						
						me. I went to beat her. I had had a glimpse of her before. She doesn't
						
						strike one at first sight. I knew about her old merchant, who's
						
						lying ill now, paralysed; but he's leaving her a decent little sum.
						
						I knew, too, that she was fond of money, that she hoarded it, and lent
						
						it at a wicked rate of interest, that she's a merciless cheat and
						
						swindler. I went to beat her, and I stayed. The storm broke- it struck
						
						me down like the plague. I'm plague-stricken still, and I know that
						
						everything is over, that there will never be anything more for me. The
						
						cycle of the ages is accomplished. That's my position. And though
						
						I'm a beggar, as fate would have it, I had three thousand just then in
						
						my pocket. I drove with Grushenka to Mokroe, a place twenty-five
						
						versts from here. I got Gypsies there and champagne and made all the
						
						peasants there drunk on it, and all the women and girls. I sent the
						
						thousands flying. In three days' time I was stripped bare, but a hero.
						
						Do you suppose the hero had gained his end? Not a sign of it from her.
						
						I tell you that rogue, Grushenka, has a supple curve all over her
						
						body. You can see it in her little foot, even in her little toe. I saw
						
						it, and kissed it, but that was all, I swear! 'I'll marry you if you
						
						like,' she said, 'you're a beggar, you know. Say that you won't beat
						
						me, and will let me do anything I choose, and perhaps I will marry
						
						you.' She laughed, and she's laughing still!"
						
							Dmitri leapt up with a sort of fury. He seemed all at once as
						
						though he were drunk. His eyes became suddenly bloodshot.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p31">"And do you really mean to marry her?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p32">"At once, if she will. And if she won't, I shall stay all the
						
						same. I'll be the porter at her gate. Alyosha!" he cried. He stopped
						
						short before him, and taking him by the shoulders began shaking him
						
						violently. "Do you know, you innocent boy, that this is all
						
						delirium, senseless delirium, for there's a tragedy here. Let me
						
						tell you, Alexey, that I may be a low man, with low and degraded
						
						passions, but a thief and a pickpocket Dmitri Karamazov never can
						
						be. Well, then; let me tell you that I am a thief and a pickpocket.
						
						That very morning, just before I went to beat Grushenka, Katerina
						
						Ivanovna sent for me, and in strict secrecy (why I don't know, I
						
						suppose she had some reason) asked me to go to the chief town of the
						
						province and to post three thousand roubles to Agafya Ivanovna in
						
						Moscow, so that nothing should be known of it in the town here. So I
						
						had that three thousand roubles in my pocket when I went to see
						
						Grushenka, and it was that money we spent at Mokroe. Afterwards I
						
						pretended I had been to the town, but did not show her the post office
						
						receipt. I said I had sent the money and would bring the receipt,
						
						and so far I haven't brought it. I've forgotten it. Now what do you
						
						think you're going to her to-day to say? 'He sends his compliments,'
						
						and she'll ask you, 'What about the money?' You might still have
						
						said to her, 'He's a degraded sensualist, and a low creature, with
						
						uncontrolled passions. He didn't send your money then, but wasted
						
						it, because, like a low brute, he couldn't control himself.' But still
						
						you might have added, 'He isn't a thief though. Here is your three
						
						thousand; he sends it back. Send it yourself to Agafya Ivanovna. But
						
						he told me to say "he sends his compliments." But, as it is, she
						
						will ask, 'But where is the money?'"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p33">"Mitya, you are unhappy, yes! But not as unhappy as you think.
						
						Don't worry yourself to death with despair."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p34">"What, do you suppose I'd shoot myself because I can't get three
						
						thousand to pay back? That's just it. I shan't shoot myself. I haven't
						
						the strength now. Afterwards, perhaps. But now I'm going to Grushenka.
						
						I don't care what happens."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p35">"And what then?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p36">"I'll be her husband if she deigns to have me, and when lovers
						
						come, I'll go into the next room. I'll clean her friends' goloshes,
						
						blow up their samovar, run their errands."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p37">"Katerina Ivanovna will understand it all," Alyosha said solemnly.
						
						"She'll understand how great this trouble is and will forgive. She has
						
						a lofty mind, and no one could be more unhappy than you. She'll see
						
						that for herself."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p38">"She won't forgive everything," said Dmitri, with a grin. "There's
						
						something in it, brother, that no woman could forgive. Do you know
						
						what would be the best thing to do?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p39">"What?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p40">"Pay back the three thousand."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p41">"Where can we get it from? I say, I have two thousand. Ivan will
						
						give you another thousand- that makes three. Take it and pay it back."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p42">"And when would you get it, your three thousand? You're not of
						
						age, besides, and you must- you absolutely must- take my farewell to
						
						her to-day, with the money or without it, for I can't drag on any
						
						longer, things have come to such a pass. To-morrow is too late. I
						
						shall send you to father."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p43">"To father?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p44">"Yes, to father first. Ask him for three thousand."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p45">"But, Mitya, he won't give it."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p46">"As though he would! I know he won't. Do you know the meaning of
						
						despair, Alexey?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p47">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p48">"Listen. Legally he owes me nothing. I've had it all from him, I
						
						know that. But morally he owes me something, doesn't he? You know he
						
						started with twenty-eight thousand of my mother's money and made a
						
						hundred thousand with it. Let him give me back only three out of the
						
						twenty-eight thousand, and he'll draw my soul out of hell, and it will
						
						atone for many of his sins. For that three thousand- I give you my
						
						solemn word- I'll make an end of everything, and he shall hear nothing
						
						more of me. For the last time I give him the chance to be a father.
						
						Tell him God Himself sends him this chance."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p49">"Mitya, he won't give it for anything."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p50">"I know he won't. I know it perfectly well. Now, especially.
						
						That's not all. I know something more. Now, only a few days ago,
						
						perhaps only yesterday he found out for the first time in earnest
						
						(underline in earnest) that Grushenka is really perhaps not joking,
						
						and really means to marry me. He knows her nature; he knows the cat.
						
						And do you suppose he's going to give me money to help to bring that
						
						about when he's crazy about her himself? And that's not all, either. I
						
						can tell you more than that. I know that for the last five days he has
						
						had three thousand drawn out of the bank, changed into notes of a
						
						hundred roubles. packed into a large envelope, sealed with five seals,
						
						and tied across with red tape. You see how well I know all about it!
						
						On the envelope is written: 'To my angel, Grushenka, when she will
						
						come to me.' He scrawled it himself in silence and in secret, and no
						
						one knows that the money's there except the valet, Smerdyakov, whom he
						
						trusts like himself. So now he has been expecting Grushenka for the
						
						last three or four days; he hopes she'll come for the money. He has
						
						sent her word of it, and she has sent him word that perhaps she'll
						
						come. And if she does go to the old man, can I marry her after that?
						
						You understand now why I'm here in secret and what I'm on the watch
						
						for."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p51">"For her?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p52">"Yes, for her. Foma has a room in the house of these sluts here.
						
						Foma comes from our parts; he was a soldier in our regiment. He does
						
						jobs for them. He's watchman at night and goes grouse-shooting in
						
						the day-time; and that's how he lives. I've established myself in
						
						his room. Neither he nor the women of the house know the secret-
						
						that is, that I am on the watch here."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p53">"No one but Smerdyakov knows, then?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p54">"No one else. He will let me know if she goes to the old man."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p55">"It was he told you about the money, then?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p56">"Yes. It's a dead secret. Even Ivan doesn't know about the
						
						money, or anything. The old man is sending Ivan to Tchermashnya on a
						
						two or three days' journey. A purchaser has turned up for the copse:
						
						he'll give eight thousand for the timber. So the old man keeps
						
						asking Ivan to help him by going to arrange it. It will take him two
						
						or three days. That's what the old man wants, so that Grushenka can
						
						come while he's away."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p57">"Then he's expecting Grushenka to-day?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p58">"No, she won't come to-day; there are signs, She's certain not
						
						to come," cried Mitya suddenly. "Smerdyakov thinks so, too. Father's
						
						drinking now. He's sitting at table with Ivan. Go to him, Alyosha, and
						
						ask for the three thousand."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p59">"Mitya, dear, what's the matter with you?" cried Alyosha,
						
						jumping up from his place, and looking keenly at his brother's
						
						frenzied face. For one moment the thought struck him that Dmitri was
						
						mad.
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p60">"What is it? I'm not insane," said Dmitri, looking intently and
						
						earnestly at him. "No fear. I am sending you to father, and I know
						
						what I'm saying. I believe in miracles."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p61">"In miracles?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p62">"In a miracle of Divine Providence. God knows my heart. He sees my
						
						despair. He sees the whole picture. Surely He won't let something
						
						awful happen. Alyosha, I believe in miracles. Go!"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p63">"I am going. Tell me, will you wait for me here?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p64">"Yes. I know it will take some time. You can't go at him point
						
						blank. He's drunk now. I'll wait three hours- four, five, six,
						
						seven. Only remember you must go to Katerina Ivanovna to-day, if it
						
						has to be at midnight, with the money or without the money, and say,
						
						'He sends his compliments to you.' I want you to say that verse to
						
						her: 'He sends his compliments to you.'"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p65">"Mitya! And what if Grushenka comes to-day- if not to-day, or
						
						the next day?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p66">"Grushenka? I shall see her. I shall rush out and prevent it."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p67">"And if- ?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p68">"If there's an if, it will be murder. I couldn't endure it."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p69">"Who will be murdered?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p70">"The old man. I shan't kill her."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p71">"Brother, what are you saying?"
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p72">"Oh, I don't know.... I don't know. Perhaps I shan't kill, and
						
						perhaps I shall. I'm afraid that he will suddenly become so
						
						loathsome to me with his face at that moment. I hate his ugly
						
						throat, his nose, his eyes, his shameless snigger. I feel a physical
						
						repulsion. That's what I'm afraid of. That's what may be too much
						
						for me."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p73">"I'll go, Mitya. I believe that God will order things for the
						
						best, that nothing awful may happen."
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p74">"And I will sit and wait for the miracle. And if it doesn't come
						
						to pass- "
						
							</p><p id="v_2-p75">Alyosha went thoughtfully towards his father's house.</p>					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - Smerdyakov" prev="v_2" next="vii_1" id="vi_1">
					
					
						<p id="vi_1-p1">HE did in fact find his father still at table. Though there was
						
						a dining-room in the house, the table was laid as usual in the drawing
						
						room, which was the largest room, and furnished with old-fashioned
						
						ostentation. The furniture was white and very old, upholstered in old,
						
						red, silky material. In the spaces between the windows there were
						
						mirrors in elaborate white and gilt frames, of old-fashioned
						
						carving. On the walls, covered with white paper, which was torn in
						
						many places, there hung two large portraits- one of some prince who
						
						had been governor of the district thirty years before, and the other
						
						of some bishop, also long since dead. In the corner opposite the
						
						door there were several ikons, before which a lamp was lighted at
						
						nightfall... not so much for devotional purposes as to light the room.
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch used to go to bed very late, at three or four
						
						o'clock in the morning, and would wander about the room at night or sit
						
						in an armchair, thinking. This had become a habit with him. He often
						
						slept quite alone in the house, sending his servants to the lodge; but
						
						usually Smerdyakov remained, sleeping on a bench in the hall.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p2">When Alyosha came in, dinner was over, but coffee and preserves
						
						had been served. Fyodor Pavlovitch liked sweet things with brandy
						
						after dinner. Ivan was also at table, sipping coffee. The servants,
						
						Grigory and Smerdyakov, were standing by. Both the gentlemen and the
						
						servants seemed in singularly good spirits. Fyodor Pavlovitch was
						
						roaring with laughter. Before he entered the room, Alyosha heard the
						
						shrill laugh he knew so well, and could tell from the sound of it that
						
						his father had only reached the good-humoured stage, and was far
						
						from being completely drunk.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p3">"Here he is! Here he is!" yelled Fyodor Pavlovitch, highly
						
						delighted at seeing Alyosha. "Join us. Sit down. Coffee is a lenten
						
						dish, but it's hot and good. I don't offer you brandy, you're
						
						keeping the fast. But would you like some? No; I'd better give you
						
						some of our famous liqueur. Smerdyakov, go to the cupboard, the second
						
						shelf on the right. Here are the keys. Look sharp!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p4">Alyosha began refusing the liqueur.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p5">"Never mind. If you won't have it, we will," said Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, beaming. "But stay- have you dined?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p6">"Yes," answered Alyosha, who had in truth only eaten a piece of
						
						bread and drunk a glass of kvass in the Father Superior's kitchen.
						
						"Though I should be pleased to have some hot coffee."
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p7">"Bravo, my darling! He'll have some coffee. Does it want
						
						warming? No, it's boiling. It's capital coffee: Smerdyakov's making.
						
						My Smerdyakov's an artist at coffee and at fish patties, and at fish
						
						soup, too. You must come one day and have some fish soup. Let me
						
						know beforehand.... But, stay; didn't I tell you this morning to
						
						come home with your mattress and pillow and all? Have you brought your
						
						mattress? He he he!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p8">"No, I haven't," said Alyosha, smiling, too.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p9">"Ah, but you were frightened, you were frightened this morning,
						
						weren't you? There, my darling, I couldn't do anything to vex you.
						
						Do you know, Ivan, I can't resist the way he looks one straight in the
						
						face and laughs? It makes me laugh all over. I'm so fond of him.
						
						Alyosha, let me give you my blessing- a father's blessing."
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p10">Alyosha rose, but Fyodor Pavlovitch had already changed his mind.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p11">"No, no," he said. "I'll just make the sign of the cross over you,
						
						for now. Sit still. Now we've a treat for you, in your own line,
						
						too. It'll make you laugh. Balaam's ass has begun talking to us
						
						here- and how he talks! How he talks!
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p12">Balaam's ass, it appeared, was the valet, Smerdyakov. He was a
						
						young man of about four and twenty, remarkably unsociable and
						
						taciturn. Not that he was shy or bashful. On the contrary, he was
						
						conceited and seemed to despise everybody.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p13">But we must pause to say a few words about him now. He was brought
						
						up by Grigory and Marfa, but the boy grew up "with no sense of
						
						gratitude," as Grigory expressed it; he was an unfriendly boy, and
						
						seemed to look at the world mistrustfully. In his childhood he was
						
						very fond of hanging cats, and burying them with great ceremony. He
						
						used to dress up in a sheet as though it were a surplice, and sang,
						
						and waved some object over the dead cat as though it were a censer.
						
						All this he did on the sly, with the greatest secrecy. Grigory
						
						caught him once at this diversion and gave him a sound beating. He
						
						shrank into a corner and sulked there for a week. "He doesn't care for
						
						you or me, the monster," Grigory used to say to Marfa, "and he doesn't
						
						care for anyone. Are you a human being?" he said, addressing the boy
						
						directly. "You're not a human being. You grew from the mildew in the
						
						bath-house. That's what you are," Smerdyakov, it appeared
						
						afterwards, could never forgive him those words. Grigory taught him to
						
						read and write, and when he was twelve years old, began teaching him
						
						the Scriptures. But this teaching came to nothing. At the second or
						
						third lesson the boy suddenly grinned.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p14">"What's that for?" asked Grigory, looking at him threateningly
						
						from under his spectacles.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p15">"Oh, nothing. God created light on the first day, and the sun,
						
						moon, and stars on the fourth day. Where did the light come from on
						
						the first day?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p16">Grigory was thunderstruck. The boy looked sarcastically at his
						
						teacher. There was something positively condescending in his
						
						expression. Grigory could not restrain himself. "I'll show you where!"
						
						he cried, and gave the boy a violent slap on the cheek. The boy took
						
						the slap without a word, but withdrew into his corner again for some
						
						days. A week later he had his first attack of the disease to which
						
						he was subject all the rest of his life- epilepsy. When Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch heard of it, his attitude to the boy seemed changed at
						
						once. Till then he had taken no notice of him, though he never scolded
						
						him, and always gave him a copeck when he met him. Sometimes, when
						
						he was in good humour, he would send the boy something sweet from
						
						his table. But as soon as he heard of his illness, he showed an active
						
						interest in him, sent for a doctor, and tried remedies, but the
						
						disease turned out to be incurable. The fits occurred, on an
						
						average, once a month, but at various intervals. The fits varied
						
						too, in violence: some were light and some were very severe. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch strictly forbade Grigory to use corporal punishment to
						
						the boy, and began allowing him to come upstairs to him. He forbade
						
						him to be taught anything whatever for a time, too. One day when the
						
						boy was about fifteen, Fyodor Pavlovitch noticed him lingering by
						
						the bookcase, and reading the titles through the glass. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch had a fair number of books- over a hundred- but no one ever
						
						saw him reading. He at once gave Smerdyakov the key of the bookcase.
						
						"Come, read. You shall be my librarian. You'll be better sitting
						
						reading than hanging about the courtyard. Come, read this," and Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch gave him Evenings in a Cottage near Dikanka.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p17">He read a little but didn't like it. He did not once smile, and
						
						ended by frowning.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p18">"Why? Isn't it funny?" asked Fyodor Pavlovitch. Smerdyakov did not
						
						speak.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p19">"Answer stupid!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p20">"It's all untrue," mumbled the boy, with a grin.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p21">"Then go to the devil! You have the soul of a lackey. Stay, here's
						
						Smaragdov's Universal History. That's all true. Read that."
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p22">But Smerdyakov did not get through ten pages of Smaragdov. He
						
						thought it dull. So the bookcase was closed again.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p23">Shortly afterwards Marfa and Grigory reported to Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						that Smerdyakov was gradually beginning to show an extraordinary
						
						fastidiousness. He would sit before his soup, take up his spoon and
						
						look into the soup, bend over it, examine it, take a spoonful and hold
						
						it to the light.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p24">"What is it? A beetle?" Grigory would ask.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p25">"A fly, perhaps," observed Marfa.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p26">The squeamish youth never answered, but he did the same with his
						
						bread, his meat, and everything he ate. He would hold a piece on his
						
						fork to the light, scrutinise it microscopically, and only after
						
						long deliberation decide to put it in his mouth.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p27">"Ach! What fine gentlemen's airs!" Grigory muttered, looking at
						
						him.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p28">When Fyodor Pavlovitch heard of this development in Smerdyakov
						
						he determined to make him his cook, and sent him to Moscow to be
						
						trained. He spent some years there and came back remarkably changed in
						
						appearance. He looked extraordinarily old for his age. His face had
						
						grown wrinkled, yellow, and strangely emasculate. In character he
						
						seemed almost exactly the same as before he went away. He was just
						
						as unsociable, and showed not the slightest inclination for any
						
						companionship. In Moscow, too, as we heard afterwards, he had always
						
						been silent. Moscow itself had little interest for him; he saw very
						
						little there, and took scarcely any notice of anything. He went once
						
						to the theatre, but returned silent and displeased with it. On the
						
						other hand, he came back to us from Moscow well dressed, in a clean
						
						coat and clean linen. He brushed his clothes most scrupulously twice a
						
						day invariably, and was very fond of cleaning his smart calf boots
						
						with a special English polish, so that they shone like mirrors. He
						
						turned out a first rate cook. Fyodor Pavlovitch paid him a salary,
						
						almost the whole of which Smerdyakov spent on clothes, pomade,
						
						perfumes, and such things. But he seemed to have as much contempt
						
						for the female sex as for men; he was discreet, almost unapproachable,
						
						with them. Fyodor Pavlovitch began to regard him rather differently.
						
						His fits were becoming more frequent, and on the days he was ill Marfa
						
						cooked, which did not suit Fyodor Pavlovitch at all.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p29">"Why are your fits getting worse?" asked Fyodor Pavlovitch,
						
						looking askance at his new cook. "Would you like to get married? Shall
						
						I find you a wife?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p30">But Smerdyakov turned pale with anger, and made no reply. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch left him with an impatient gesture. The great thing was
						
						that he had absolute confidence in his honesty. It happened once, when
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch was drunk, that he dropped in the muddy courtyard
						
						three hundred-rouble notes which he had only just received. He only
						
						missed them next day, and was just hastening to search his pockets
						
						when he saw the notes lying on the table. Where had they come from?
						
						Smerdyakov had picked them up and brought them in the day before.
						
							</p><p id="vi_1-p31">"Well, my lad, I've never met anyone like you," Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch said shortly, and gave him ten roubles. We may add that
						
						he not only believed in his honesty, but had, for some reason, a
						
						liking for him, although the young man looked as morosely at him as at
						
						everyone and was always silent. He rarely spoke. If it had occurred to
						
						anyone to wonder at the time what the young man was interested in, and
						
						what was in his mind, it would have been impossible to tell by looking
						
						at him. Yet he used sometimes to stop suddenly in the house, or even
						
						in the yard or street, and would stand still for ten minutes, lost
						
						in thought. A physiognomist studying his face would have said that
						
						there was no thought in it, no reflection, but only a sort of
						
						contemplation. There is a remarkable picture by the painter
						
						Kramskoy, called "Contemplation." There is a forest in winter, and
						
						on a roadway through the forest, in absolute solitude, stands a
						
						peasant in a torn kaftan and bark shoes. He stands, as it were, lost
						
						in thought. Yet he is not thinking; he is "contemplating." If anyone
						
						touched him he would start and look at one as though awakening and
						
						bewildered. It's true he would come to himself immediately; but if
						
						he were asked what he had been thinking about, he would remember
						
						nothing. Yet probably he has, hidden within himself, the impression
						
						which had dominated him during the period of contemplation. Those
						
						impressions are dear to him and no doubt he hoards them imperceptibly,
						
						and even unconsciously. How and why, of course, he does not know
						
						either. He may suddenly, after hoarding impressions for many years,
						
						abandon everything and go off to Jerusalem on a pilgrimage for his
						
						soul's salvation, or perhaps he will suddenly set fire to his native
						
						village, and perhaps do both. There are a good many "contemplatives"
						
						among the peasantry. Well, Smerdyakov was probably one of them, and he
						
						probably was greedily hoarding up his impressions, hardly knowing why.</p>					
										
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - The Controversy" prev="vi_1" next="viii_1" id="vii_1">
					
					
						<p id="vii_1-p1">BUT Balaam's ass had suddenly spoken. The subject was a strange
						
						one. Grigory had gone in the morning to make purchases, and had
						
						heard from the shopkeeper Lukyanov the story of a Russian soldier
						
						which had appeared in the newspaper of that day. This soldier had been
						
						taken prisoner in some remote part of Asia, and was threatened with an
						
						immediate agonising death if he did not renounce Christianity and
						
						follow Islam. He refused to deny his faith, and was tortured, flayed
						
						alive, and died, praising and glorifying Christ. Grigory had related
						
						the story at table. Fyodor Pavlovitch always liked, over the dessert
						
						after dinner, to laugh and talk, if only with Grigory. This
						
						afternoon he was in a particularly good-humoured and expansive mood.
						
						Sipping his brandy and listening to the story, he observed that they
						
						ought to make a saint of a soldier like that, and to take his skin
						
						to some monastery. "That would make the people flock, and bring the
						
						money in."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p2">Grigory frowned, seeing that Fyodor Pavlovitch was by no means
						
						touched, but, as usual, was beginning to scoff. At that moment
						
						Smerdyakov, who was standing by the door, smiled. Smerdyakov often
						
						waited at table towards the end of dinner, and since Ivan's arrival in
						
						our town he had done so every day.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p3">"What are you grinning at?" asked Fyodor Pavlovitch, catching
						
						the smile instantly, and knowing that it referred to Grigory.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p4">"Well, my opinion is," Smerdyakov began suddenly and
						
						unexpectedly in a loud voice, "that if that laudable soldier's exploit
						
						was so very great there would have been, to my thinking, no sin in
						
						it if he had on such an emergency renounced, so to speak, the name
						
						of Christ and his own christening, to save by that same his life,
						
						for good deeds, by which, in the course of years to expiate his
						
						cowardice."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p5">"How could it not be a sin? You're talking nonsense. For that
						
						you'll go straight to hell and be roasted there like mutton," put in
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p6">It was at this point that Alyosha came in, and Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, as we have seen, was highly delighted at his appearance.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p7">"We're on your subject, your subject," he chuckled gleefully,
						
						making Alyosha sit down to listen.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p8">"As for mutton, that's not so, and there'll be nothing there for
						
						this, and there shouldn't be either, if it's according to justice,"
						
						Smerdyakov maintained stoutly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p9">"How do you mean 'according to justice'?" Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						cried still more gaily, nudging Alyosha with his knee.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p10">"He's a rascal, that's what he is!" burst from Grigory. He
						
						looked Smerdyakov wrathfully in the face.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p11">"As for being a rascal, wait a little, Grigory Vassilyevitch,"
						
						answered Smerdyakov with perfect composure. "You'd better consider
						
						yourself that, once I am taken prisoner by the enemies of the
						
						Christian race, and they demand from me to curse the name of God and
						
						to renounce my holy christening, I am fully entitled to act by my
						
						own reason, since there would be no sin in it."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p12">"But you've said that before. Don't waste words. Prove it,"
						
						cried Fyodor Pavlovitch.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p13">"Soup-maker!" muttered Grigory contemptuously.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p14">"As for being a soup-maker, wait a bit, too, and consider for
						
						yourself, Grigory Vassilyevitch, without abusing me. For as soon as
						
						I say to those enemies, 'No, I'm not a Christian, and I curse my
						
						true God,' then at once, by God's high judgment, I become
						
						immediately and specially anathema accursed, and am cut off from the
						
						Holy Church, exactly as though I were a heathen, so that at that
						
						very instant, not only when I say it aloud, but when I think of saying
						
						it, before a quarter of a second has passed, I am cut off. Is that
						
						so or not, Grigory Vassilyevitch?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p15">He addressed Grigory with obvious satisfaction, though he was
						
						really answering Fyodor Pavlovitch's questions, and was well aware
						
						of it, and intentionally pretending that Grigory had asked the
						
						questions.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p16">"Ivan," cried Fyodor Pavlovitch suddenly, "stoop down for me to
						
						whisper. He's got this all up for your benefit. He wants you to praise
						
						him. Praise him."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p17">Ivan listened with perfect seriousness to his father's excited
						
						whisper.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p18">"Stay, Smerdyakov, be quiet a minute," cried Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						once more. "Ivan, your ear again."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p19">Ivan bent down again with a perfectly grave face.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p20">"I love you as I do Alyosha. Don't think I don't love you. Some
						
						brandy?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p21">"Yes.- But you're rather drunk yourself," thought Ivan, looking
						
						steadily at his father.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p22">He was watching Smerdyakov with great curiosity.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p23">"You're anathema accursed, as it is, Grigory suddenly burst out,
						
						"and how dare you argue, you rascal, after that, if- "
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p24">"Don't scold him, Grigory, don't scold him," Fyodor Pavlovitch cut
						
						him short.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p25">"You should wait, Grigory Vassilyevitch, if only a short time, and
						
						listen, for I haven't finished all I had to say. For at the very
						
						moment I become accursed, at that same highest moment, I become
						
						exactly like a heathen, and my christening is taken off me and becomes
						
						of no avail. Isn't that so?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p26">"Make haste and finish, my boy," Fyodor Pavlovitch urged him,
						
						sipping from his wineglass with relish.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p27">"And if I've ceased to be a Christian, then I told no lie to the
						
						enemy when they asked whether I was a Christian or not a Christian,
						
						seeing I had already been relieved by God Himself of my Christianity
						
						by reason of the thought alone, before I had time to utter a word to
						
						the enemy. And if I have already been discharged, in what manner and
						
						with what sort of justice can I be held responsible as a Christian
						
						in the other world for having denied Christ, when, through the very
						
						thought alone, before denying Him I had been relieved from my
						
						christening? If I'm no longer a Christian, then I can't renounce
						
						Christ, for I've nothing then to renounce. Who will hold an unclean
						
						Tatar responsible, Grigory Vassilyevitch, even in heaven, for not
						
						having been born a Christian? And who would punish him for that,
						
						considering that you can't take two skins off one ox? For God Almighty
						
						Himself, even if He did make the Tatar responsible, when he dies would
						
						give him the smallest possible punishment, I imagine (since he must be
						
						punished), judging that he is not to blame if he has come into the
						
						world an unclean heathen, from heathen parents. The Lord God can't
						
						surely take a Tatar and say he was a Christian? That would mean that
						
						the Almighty would tell a real untruth. And can the Lord of Heaven and
						
						earth tell a lie, even in one word?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p28">Grigory was thunderstruck and looked at the orator, his eyes
						
						nearly starting out of his head. Though he did not clearly
						
						understand what was said, he had caught something in this rigmarole,
						
						and stood, looking like a man who has just hit his head against a
						
						wall. Fyodor Pavlovitch emptied his glass and went off into his shrill
						
						laugh.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p29">"Alyosha! Alyosha! What do you say to that! Ah, you casuist! He
						
						must have been with the Jesuits, somewhere, Ivan. Oh, you stinking
						
						Jesuit, who taught you? But you're talking nonsense, you casuist,
						
						nonsense, nonsense, nonsense. Don't cry, Grigory, we'll reduce him
						
						to smoke and ashes in a moment. Tell me this, O ass; you may be
						
						right before your enemies, but you have renounced your faith all the
						
						same in your own heart, and you say yourself that in that very hour
						
						you became anathema accursed. And if once you're anathema they won't
						
						pat you on the head for it in hell. What do you say to that, my fine
						
						Jesuit?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p30">"There is no doubt that I have renounced it in my own heart, but
						
						there no special sin in that. Or if there was sin, it was the most
						
						ordinary."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p31">"How's that the most ordinary?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p32">"You lie, accursed one!" hissed Grigory.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p33">"Consider yourself, Grigory Vassilyevitch," Smerdyakov went on,
						
						staid and unruffled, conscious of his triumph, but, as it were,
						
						generous to the vanquished foe. "Consider yourself, Grigory
						
						Vassilyevitch; it is said in the Scripture that if you have faith,
						
						even as a mustard seed, and bid a mountain move into the sea, it
						
						will move without the least delay at your bidding. Well, Grigory
						
						Vassilyevitch, if I'm without faith and you have so great a faith that
						
						you are continually swearing at me, you try yourself telling this
						
						mountain, not to move into the sea for that's a long way off, but even
						
						to our stinking little river which runs at the bottom of the garden.
						
						You'll see for yourself that it won't budge, but will remain just
						
						where it is however much you shout at it, and that shows, Grigory
						
						Vassilyevitch, that you haven't faith in the proper manner, and only
						
						abuse others about it. Again, taking into consideration that no one in
						
						our day, not only you, but actually no one, from the highest person to
						
						the lowest peasant, can shove mountains into the sea- except perhaps
						
						some one man in the world, or, at most, two, and they most likely
						
						are saving their souls in secret somewhere in the Egyptian desert,
						
						so you wouldn't find them- if so it be, if all the rest have no faith,
						
						will God curse all the rest? that is, the population of the whole
						
						earth, except about two hermits in the desert, and in His well-known
						
						mercy will He not forgive one of them? And so I'm persuaded that
						
						though I may once have doubted I shall be forgiven if I shed tears
						
						of repentance."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p34">"Stay!" cried Fyodor Pavlovitch, in a transport of delight. "So
						
						you do suppose there are two who can move mountains? Ivan, make a note
						
						of it, write it down. There you have the Russian all over!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p35">"You're quite right in saying it's characteristic of the
						
						people's faith," Ivan assented, with an approving smile.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p36">"You agree. Then it must be so, if you agree. It's true, isn't
						
						it Alyosha? That's the Russian faith all over, isn't it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p37">"No, Smerdyakov has not the Russian faith at all," said Alyosha
						
						firmly and gravely.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p38">"I'm not talking about his faith. I mean those two in the
						
						desert, only that idea. Surely that's Russian, isn't it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p39">"Yes, that's purely Russian," said Alyosha smiling.
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p40">"Your words are worth a gold piece, O ass, and I'll give it to you
						
						to-day. But as to the rest you talk nonsense, nonsense, nonsense.
						
						Let me tell you, stupid, that we here are all of little faith, only
						
						from carelessness, because we haven't time; things are too much for
						
						us, and, in the second place, the Lord God has given us so little
						
						time, only twenty-four hours in the day, so that one hasn't even
						
						time to get sleep enough, much less to repent of one's sins. While you
						
						have denied your faith to your enemies when you'd nothing else to
						
						think about but to show your faith! So I consider, brother, that it
						
						constitutes a sin."
						
							</p><p id="vii_1-p41">"Constitute a sin it may, but consider yourself, Grigory
						
						Vassilyevitch, that it only extenuates it, if it does constitute. If I
						
						had believed then in very truth, as I ought to have believed, then
						
						it really would have been sinful if I had not faced tortures for my
						
						faith, and had gone over to the pagan Mohammedan faith. But, of
						
						course, it wouldn't have come to torture then, because I should only
						
						have had to say at that instant to the mountain, 'Move and crush the
						
						tormentor,' and it would have moved and at the very instant have
						
						crushed him like a black-beetle, and I should have walked away as
						
						though nothing had happened, praising and glorifying God. But, suppose
						
						at that very moment I had tried all that, and cried to that
						
						mountain, 'Crush these tormentors,' and it hadn't crushed them, how
						
						could I have helped doubting, pray, at such a time, and at such a
						
						dread hour of mortal terror? And apart from that, I should know
						
						already that I could not attain to the fullness of the Kingdom of
						
						Heaven (for since the mountain had not moved at my word, they could
						
						not think very much of my faith up aloft, and there could be no very
						
						great reward awaiting me in the world to come). So why should I let
						
						them flay the skin off me as well, and to no good purpose? For, even
						
						though they had flayed my skin half off my back, even then the
						
						mountain would not have moved at my word or at my cry. And at such a
						
						moment not only doubt might come over one but one might lose one's
						
						reason from fear, so that one would not be able to think at all.
						
						And, therefore, how should I be particularly to blame if not seeing my
						
						advantage or reward there or here, I should, at least, save my skin.
						
						And so trusting fully in the grace of the Lord I should cherish the
						
						hope that I might be altogether forgiven."	</p>				
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 8 - Over the Brandy" prev="vii_1" next="ix" id="viii_1">
					
						<p id="viii_1-p1">THE controversy was over. But, strange to say, Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, who had been so gay, suddenly began frowning. He frowned
						
						and gulped brandy, and it was already a glass too much.
						
							"Get along with you, Jesuits!" he cried to the servants. "Go away,
						
						Smerdyakov. I'll send you the gold piece I promised you to-day, but be
						
						off! Don't cry, Grigory. Go to Marfa. She'll comfort you and put you
						
						to bed. The rascals won't let us sit in peace after dinner," he
						
						snapped peevishly, as the servants promptly withdrew at his word.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p2">"Smerdyakov always pokes himself in now, after dinner. It's you
						
						he's so interested in. What have you done to fascinate him?" he
						
						added to Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p3">"Nothing whatever," answered Ivan. "He's pleased to have a high
						
						opinion of me; he's a lackey and a mean soul. Raw material for
						
						revolution, however, when the time comes."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p4">"There will be others and better ones. But there will be some like
						
						him as well. His kind will come first, and better ones after."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p5">"And when will the time come?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p6">"The rocket will go off and fizzle out, perhaps. The peasants
						
						are not very fond of listening to these soup-makers, so far."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p7">"Ah, brother, but a Balaam's ass like that thinks and thinks,
						
						and the devil knows where he gets to."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p8">"He's storing up ideas," said Ivan, smiling.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p9">"You see, I know he can't bear me, nor anyone else, even you,
						
						though you fancy that he has a high opinion of you. Worse still with
						
						Alyosha, he despises Alyosha. But he doesn't steal, that's one
						
						thing, and he's not a gossip, he holds his tongue, and doesn't wash
						
						our dirty linen in public. He makes capital fish pasties too. But,
						
						damn him, is he worth talking about so much?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p10">"Of course he isn't."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p11">"And as for the ideas he may be hatching, the Russian peasant,
						
						generally speaking, needs thrashing. That I've always maintained.
						
						Our peasants are swindlers, and don't deserve to be pitied, and it's a
						
						good thing they're still flogged sometimes. Russia is rich in birches.
						
						If they destroyed the forests, it would be the ruin of Russia. I stand
						
						up for the clever people. We've left off thrashing the peasants, we've
						
						grown so clever, but they go on thrashing themselves. And a good thing
						
						too. 'For with what measure ye mete it shall be measured to you
						
						again,' or how does it go? Anyhow, it will be measured. But Russia's
						
						all swinishness. My dear, if you only knew how I hate Russia....
						
						That is, not Russia, but all this vice! But maybe I mean Russia.
						
						Tout cela c'est de la cochonnerie....* Do you know what I like? I like
						
						wit."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p12" /><p id="viii_1-p13" /><p id="viii_1-p14">* All this is filthiness.</p><p id="viii_1-p15" /><p id="viii_1-p16">
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p17">"You've had another glass. That's enough."
						
							"Wait a bit. I'll have one more, and then another, and then I'll
						
						stop. No, stay, you interrupted me. At Mokroe I was talking to an
						
						old man, and he told me: 'There's nothing we like so much as
						
						sentencing girls to be thrashed, and we always give the lads the job
						
						of thrashing them. And the girl he has thrashed to-day, the young
						
						man will ask in marriage to-morrow. So it quite suits the girls, too,'
						
						he said. There's a set of de Sades for you! But it's clever, anyway.
						
						Shall we go over and have a look at it, eh? Alyosha, are you blushing?
						
						Don't be bashful, child. I'm sorry I didn't stay to dinner at the
						
						Superior's and tell the monks about the girls at Mokroe. Alyosha,
						
						don't be angry that I offended your Superior this morning. I lost my
						
						temper. If there is a God, if He exists, then, of course, I'm to
						
						blame, and I shall have to answer for it. But if there isn't a God
						
						at all, what do they deserve, your fathers? It's not enough to cut
						
						their heads off, for they keep back progress. Would you believe it,
						
						Ivan, that that lacerates my sentiments? No, you don't believe it as I
						
						see from your eyes. You believe what people say, that I'm nothing
						
						but a buffoon. Alyosha, do you believe that I'm nothing but a
						
						buffoon?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p18">"No, I don't believe it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p19">"And I believe you don't, and that you speak the truth. You look
						
						sincere and you speak sincerely. But not Ivan. Ivan's supercilious....
						
						I'd make an end of your monks, though, all the same. I'd take all that
						
						mystic stuff and suppress it, once for all, all over Russia, so as
						
						to bring all the fools to reason. And the gold and the silver that
						
						would flow into the mint!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p20">"But why suppress it?" asked Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p21">"That Truth may prevail. That's why."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p22">"Well, if Truth were to prevail, you know, you'd be the first to
						
						be robbed and suppressed."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p23">"Ah! I dare say you're right. Ah, I'm an ass!" burst out Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, striking himself lightly on the forehead. "Well, your
						
						monastery may stand then, Alyosha, if that's how it is. And we
						
						clever people will sit snug and enjoy our brandy. You know, Ivan, it
						
						must have been so ordained by the Almighty Himself. Ivan, speak, is
						
						there a God or not? Stay, speak the truth, speak seriously. Why are
						
						you laughing again?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p24">"I'm laughing that you should have made a clever remark just now
						
						about Smerdyakov's belief in the existence of two saints who could
						
						move mountains."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p25">"Why, am I like him now, then?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p26">"Very much."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p27">"Well, that shows I'm a Russian, too, and I have a Russian
						
						characteristic. And you may be caught in the same way, though you
						
						are a philosopher. Shall I catch you? What do you bet that I'll
						
						catch you to-morrow? Speak, all the same, is there a God, or not?
						
						Only, be serious. I want you to be serious now."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p28">"No, there is no God."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p29">"Alyosha, is there a God?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p30">"There is."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p31">"Ivan, and is there immortality of some sort, just a little,
						
						just a tiny bit?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p32">"There is no immortality either."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p33">"None at all?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p34">"None at all."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p35">"There's absolute nothingness then. Perhaps there is just
						
						something? Anything is better than nothing!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p36">"Alyosha, is there immortality?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p37">"God and immortality?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p38">"God and immortality. In God is immortality."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p39">"H'm! It's more likely Ivan's right. Good Lord! to think what
						
						faith, what force of all kinds, man has lavished for nothing, on
						
						that dream, and for how many thousand years. Who is it laughing at
						
						man? Ivan For the last time, once for all, is there a God or not? I
						
						ask for the last time!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p40">"And for the last time there is not."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p41">"Who is laughing at mankind, Ivan?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p42">"It must be the devil," said Ivan, smiling.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p43">"And the devil? Does he exist?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p44">"No, there's no devil either."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p45">"It's a pity. Damn it all, what wouldn't I do to the man who first
						
						invented God! Hanging on a bitter aspen tree would be too good for,
						
						him."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p46">"There would have been no civilisation if they hadn't invented
						
						God."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p47">"Wouldn't there have been? Without God?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p48">"No. And there would have been no brandy either. But I must take
						
						your brandy away from you, anyway."
						
						</p><p id="viii_1-p49"> "Stop, stop, stop, dear boy, one more little glass. I've hurt
						
						Alyosha's feelings. You're not angry with me, Alyosha? My dear
						
						little Alexey!"
						
						</p><p id="viii_1-p50"> "No, I am not angry. I know your thoughts. Your heart is better
						
						than your head."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p51">"My heart better than my head, is it? Oh Lord! And that from
						
						you. Ivan, do you love Alyosha?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p52">"You must love him" (Fyodor Pavlovitch was by this time very
						
						drunk). "Listen, Alyosha, I was rude to your elder this morning. But I
						
						was excited. But there's wit in that elder, don't you think, Ivan?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p53">"Very likely."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p54">"There is, there is. Il y a du Piron la-dedans.* He's a Jesuit,
						
						a Russian one, that is. As he's an honourable person there's a
						
						hidden indignation boiling within him at having to pretend and
						
						affect holiness."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p55" /><p id="viii_1-p56" /><p id="viii_1-p57">* There's something of Piron inside of him.</p><p id="viii_1-p58" /><p id="viii_1-p59" /><p id="viii_1-p60">
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p61">"But, of course, he believes in God."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p62">"Not a bit of it. Didn't you know? Why, he tells everyone so,
						
						himself. That is, not everyone, but all the clever people who come
						
						to him. He said straight out to Governor Schultz not long ago: 'Credo,
						
						but I don't know in what.'"
						
						</p><p id="viii_1-p63"> "Really?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p64">"He really did. But I respect him. There's something of
						
						Mephistopheles about him, or rather of 'The hero of our time'...
						
						Arbenin, or what's his name?... You see, he's a sensualist. He's
						
						such a sensualist that I should be afraid for my daughter or my wife
						
						if she went to confess to him. You know, when he begins telling
						
						stories... The year before last he invited us to tea, tea with liqueur
						
						(the ladies send him liqueur), and began telling us about old times
						
						till we nearly split our sides.... Especially how he once cured a
						
						paralysed woman. 'If my legs were not bad I know a dance I could dance
						
						you,' he said. What do you say to that? 'I've plenty of tricks in my
						
						time,' said he. He did Demidov, the merchant, out of sixty thousand."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p65">"What, he stole it?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p66">"He brought him the money as a man he could trust, saying, 'Take
						
						care of it for me, friend, there'll be a police search at my place
						
						to-morrow.' And he kept it. 'You have given it to the Church,' he
						
						declared. I said to him: 'You're a scoundrel,' I said. 'No,' said
						
						he, 'I'm not a scoundrel, but I'm broadminded.' But that wasn't he,
						
						that was someone else. I've muddled him with someone else... without
						
						noticing it. Come, another glass and that's enough. Take away the
						
						bottle, Ivan. I've been telling lies. Why didn't you stop me, Ivan,
						
						and tell me I was lying?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p67">"I knew you'd stop of yourself."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p68">"That's a lie. You did it from spite, from simple spite against
						
						me. You despise me. You have come to me and despised me in my own
						
						house."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p69">"Well, I'm going away. You've had too much brandy."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p70">"I've begged you for Christ's sake to go to Tchermashnya for a day
						
						or two, and you don't go."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p71">"I'll go to-morrow if you're so set upon it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p72">"You won't go. You want to keep an eye on me. That's what you
						
						want, spiteful fellow. That's why you won't go."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p73">The old man persisted. He had reached that state of drunkenness
						
						when the drunkard who has till then been inoffensive tries to pick a
						
						quarrel and to assert himself.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p74">"Why are you looking at me? Why do you look like that? Your eyes
						
						look at me and say, 'You ugly drunkard!' Your eyes are mistrustful.
						
						They're contemptuous.... You've come here with some design. Alyosha,
						
						here, looks at me and his eyes shine. Alyosha doesn't despise me.
						
						Alexey, you mustn't love Ivan."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p75">"Don't be ill-tempered with my brother. Leave off attacking
						
						him," Alyosha said emphatically.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p76">"Oh, all right. Ugh, my head aches. Take away the brandy, Ivan.
						
						It's the third time I've told you."
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p77">He mused, and suddenly a slow, cunning grin spread over his face.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p78">"Don't be angry with a feeble old man, Ivan. I know you don't love
						
						me, but don't be angry all the same. You've nothing to love me for.
						
						You go to Tchermashnya. I'll come to you myself and bring you a
						
						present. I'll show you a little wench there. I've had my eye on her
						
						a long time. She's still running about bare-foot. Don't be afraid of
						
						bare-footed wenches- don't despise them- they're pearls!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p79">And he kissed his hand with a smack.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p80">"To my thinking," he revived at once, seeming to grow sober the
						
						instant he touched on his favourite topic. "To my thinking... Ah,
						
						you boys! You children, little sucking-pigs, to my thinking... I never
						
						thought a woman ugly in my life- that's been my rule! Can you
						
						understand that? How could you understand it? You've milk in your
						
						veins, not blood. You're not out of your shells yet. My rule has
						
						been that you can always find something devilishly interesting in
						
						every woman that you wouldn't find in any other. Only, one must know
						
						how to find it, that's the point! That's a talent! To my mind there
						
						are no ugly women. The very fact that she is a woman is half the
						
						battle... but how could you understand that? Even in vieilles
						
						filles, even in them you may discover something that makes you
						
						simply wonder that men have been such fools as to let them grow old
						
						without noticing them. Bare-footed girls or unattractive ones, you
						
						must take by surprise. Didn't you know that? You must astound them
						
						till they're fascinated, upset, ashamed that such a gentleman should
						
						fall in love with such a little slut. It's a jolly good thing that
						
						there always are and will be masters and slaves in the world, so there
						
						always will be a little maid-of-all-work and her master, and you know,
						
						that's all that's needed for happiness. Stay... listen, Alyosha, I
						
						always used to surprise your mother, but in a different way. I paid no
						
						attention to her at all, but all at once, when the minute came, I'd be
						
						all devotion to her, crawl on my knees, kiss her feet, and I always,
						
						always- I remember it as though it were to-day- reduced her to that
						
						tinkling, quiet, nervous, queer little laugh. It was peculiar to
						
						her. I knew her attacks always used to begin like that. The next day
						
						she would begin shrieking hysterically, and this little laugh was
						
						not a sign of delight, though it made a very good counterfeit.
						
						That's the great thing, to know how to take everyone. Once
						
						Belyavsky- he was a handsome fellow, and rich- used to like to come
						
						here and hang about her- suddenly gave me a slap in the face in her
						
						presence. And she- such a mild sheep- why, I thought she would have
						
						knocked me down for that blow. How she set on me! 'You're beaten,
						
						beaten now,' she said, 'You've taken a blow from him. You have been
						
						trying to sell me to him,' she said... 'And how dared he strike you in
						
						my presence! Don't dare come near me again, never, never! Run at once,
						
						challenge him to a duel!'... I took her to the monastery then to bring
						
						her to her senses. The holy Fathers prayed her back to reason. But I
						
						swear, by God, Alyosha, I never insulted the poor crazy girl! Only
						
						once, perhaps, in the first year; then she was very fond of praying.
						
						She used to keep the feasts of Our Lady particularly and used to
						
						turn me out of her room then. I'll knock that mysticism out of her,
						
						thought I! 'Here,' said I, 'you see your holy image. Here it is.
						
						Here I take it down. You believe it's miraculous, but here, I'll
						
						spit on it directly and nothing will happen to me for it!'... When she
						
						saw it, good Lord! I thought she would kill me. But she only jumped
						
						up, wrung her hands, then suddenly hid her face in them, began
						
						trembling all over and fell on the floor... fell all of a heap.
						
						Alyosha, Alyosha, what's the matter?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p81">The old man jumped up in alarm. From the time he had begun
						
						speaking about his mother, a change had gradually come over
						
						Alyosha's face. He flushed crimson, his eyes glowed, his lips
						
						quivered. The old sot had gone spluttering on, noticing nothing,
						
						till the moment when something very strange happened to Alyosha.
						
						Precisely what he was describing in the crazy woman was suddenly
						
						repeated with Alyosha. He jumped up from his seat exactly as his
						
						mother was said to have done, wrung his hands, hid his face in them,
						
						and fell back in his chair, shaking all over in an hysterical paroxysm
						
						of sudden violent, silent weeping. His extraordinary resemblance to
						
						his mother particularly impressed the old man.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p82">"Ivan, Ivan! Water, quickly! It's like her, exactly as she used to
						
						be then, his mother. Spurt some water on him from your mouth, that's
						
						what I used to do to her. He's upset about his mother, his mother," he
						
						muttered to Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p83">"But she was my mother, too, I believe, his mother. Was she
						
						not?" said Ivan, with uncontrolled anger and contempt. The old man
						
						shrank before his flashing eyes. But something very strange had
						
						happened, though only for a second; it seemed really to have escaped
						
						the old man's mind that Alyosha's mother actually was the mother of
						
						Ivan too.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p84">"Your mother?" he muttered, not understanding. "What do you
						
						mean? What mother are you talking about? Was she?... Why, damn it!
						
						of course she was yours too! Damn it! My mind has never been so
						
						darkened before. Excuse me, why, I was thinking Ivan... He he he!"
						
						He stopped. A broad, drunken, half senseless grin overspread his face.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p85">At that moment a fearful noise, and clamour was heard in the hall,
						
						there were violent shouts, the door was flung open, and Dmitri burst
						
						into the room. The old man rushed to Ivan in terror.
						
							</p><p id="viii_1-p86">"He'll kill me! He'll kill me! Don't let him get at me!" he
						
						screamed, clinging to the skirt of Ivan's coat.		</p>			
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 9 - The Sensualists" prev="viii_1" next="x" id="ix">
					
					
						<p id="ix-p1">GRIGORY and Smerdyakov ran into the room after Dmitri. They had
						
						been struggling with him in the passage, refusing to admit him, acting
						
						on instructions given them by Fyodor Pavlovitch some days before.
						
						Taking advantage of the fact that Dmitri stopped a moment on
						
						entering the room to look about him, Grigory ran round the table,
						
						closed the double doors on the opposite side of the room leading to
						
						the inner apartments, and stood before the closed doors, stretching
						
						wide his arms, prepared to defend the entrance, so to speak, with
						
						the last drop of his blood. Seeing this, Dmitri uttered a scream
						
						rather than a shout and rushed at Grigory.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p2">"Then she's there! She's hidden there! Out of the way, scoundrel!"
						
							He tried to pull Grigory away, but the old servant pushed him
						
						back. Beside himself with fury, Dmitri struck out, and hit Grigory
						
						with all his might. The old man fell like a log, and Dmitri, leaping
						
						over him, broke in the door. Smerdyakov remained pale and trembling at
						
						the other end of the room, huddling close to Fyodor Pavlovitch.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p3">"She's here!" shouted Dmitri. "I saw her turn towards the house
						
						just now, but I couldn't catch her. Where is she? Where is she?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p4">That shout, "She's here!" produced an indescribable effect on
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch. All his terror left him.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p5">"Hold him! Hold him!" he cried, and dashed after Dmitri. Meanwhile
						
						Grigory had got up from the floor, but still seemed stunned. Ivan
						
						and Alyosha ran after their father. In the third room something was
						
						heard to fall on the floor with a ringing crash: it was a large
						
						glass vase- not an expensive one- on a marble pedestal which Dmitri
						
						had upset as he ran past it.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p6">"At him!" shouted the old man. "Help!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p7">Ivan and Alyosha caught the old man and were forcibly bringing him
						
						back.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p8">"Why do you run after him? He'll murder you outright," Ivan
						
						cried wrathfully at his father.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p9">"Ivan! Alyosha! She must be here. Grushenka's here. He said he saw
						
						her himself, running."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p10">He was choking. He was not expecting Grushenka at the time, and
						
						the sudden news that she was here made him beside himself. He was
						
						trembling all over. He seemed frantic.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p11">"But you've seen for yourself that she hasn't come," cried Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p12">"But she may have come by that other entrance."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p13">"You know that entrance is locked, and you have the key."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p14">Dmitri suddenly reappeared in the drawing-room. He had, of course,
						
						found the other entrance locked, and the key actually was in Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's pocket. The windows of all rooms were also closed, so
						
						Grushenka could not have come in anywhere nor have run out anywhere.
						
							"Hold him!" shrieked Fyodor Pavlovitch, as soon as he saw him
						
						again. "He's been stealing money in my bedroom." And tearing himself
						
						from Ivan he rushed again at Dmitri. But Dmitri threw up both hands
						
						and suddenly clutched the old man by the two tufts of hair that
						
						remained on his temples, tugged at them, and flung him with a crash on
						
						the floor. He kicked him two or three times with his heel in the face.
						
						The old man moaned shrilly. Ivan, though not so strong as Dmitri,
						
						threw his arms round him, and with all his might pulled him away.
						
						Alyosha helped him with his slender strength, holding Dmitri in front.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p15">"Madman! You've killed him!" cried Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p16">"Serve him right!" shouted Dmitri breathlessly. "If I haven't
						
						killed him, I'll come again and kill him. You can't protect him!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p17">"Dmitri! Go away at once!" cried Alyosha commandingly.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p18">"Alexey! You tell me. It's only you I can believe; was she here
						
						just now, or not? I saw her myself creeping this way by the fence from
						
						the lane. I shouted, she ran away."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p19">"I swear she's not been here, and no one expected her."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p20">"But I saw her.... So she must... I'll find out at once where
						
						she is.... Good-bye, Alexey! Not a word to Aesop about the money
						
						now. But go to Katerina Ivanovna at once and be sure to say, 'He sends
						
						his compliments to you!' Compliments, his compliments! just
						
						compliments and farewell! Describe the scene to her."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p21">Meanwhile Ivan and Grigory had raised the old man and seated him
						
						in an arm-chair. His face was covered with blood, but he was conscious
						
						and listened greedily to Dmitri's cries. He was still fancying that
						
						Grushenka really was somewhere in the house. Dmitri looked at him with
						
						hatred as he went out.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p22">"I don't repent shedding your blood!" he cried. "Beware, old
						
						man, beware of your dream, for I have my dream, too. I curse you,
						
						and disown you altogether."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p23">He ran out of the room.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p24">"She's here. She must be here. Smerdyakov! Smerdyakov!" the old
						
						man wheezed, scarcely audibly, beckoning to him with his finger.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p25">"No, she's not here, you old lunatic!" Ivan shouted at him
						
						angrily. "Here, he's fainting? Water! A towel! Make haste,
						
						Smerdyakov!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p26">Smerdyakov ran for water. At last they got the old man
						
						undressed, and put him to bed. They wrapped a wet towel round his
						
						head. Exhausted by the brandy, by his violent emotion, and the blows
						
						he had received, he shut his eyes and fell asleep as soon as his
						
						head touched the pillow. Ivan and Alyosha went back to the
						
						drawing-room. Smerdyakov removed the fragments of the broken vase,
						
						while Grigory stood by the table looking gloomily at the floor.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p27">"Shouldn't you put a wet bandage on your head and go to bed, too?"
						
						Alyosha said to him. "We'll look after him. My brother gave you a
						
						terrible blow- on the head."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p28">"He's insulted me!" Grigory articulated gloomily and distinctly.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p29">"He's 'insulted' his father, not only you," observed Ivan with a
						
						forced smile.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p30">"I used to wash him in his tub. He's insulted me," repeated
						
						Grigory.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p31">"Damn it all, if I hadn't pulled him away perhaps he'd have
						
						murdered him. It wouldn't take much to do for Aesop, would it?"
						
						whispered Ivan to Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p32">"God forbid!" cried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p33">"Why should He forbid?" Ivan went on in the same whisper, with a
						
						malignant grimace. "One reptile will devour the other. And serve
						
						them both right, too."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p34">Alyosha shuddered.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p35">"Of course I won't let him be murdered as I didn't just now.
						
						Stay here, Alyosha, I'll go for a turn in the yard. My head's begun to
						
						ache."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p36">Alyosha went to his father's bedroom and sat by his bedside behind
						
						the screen for about an hour. The old man suddenly opened his eyes and
						
						gazed for a long while at Alyosha, evidently remembering and
						
						meditating. All at once his face betrayed extraordinary excitement.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p37">"Alyosha," he whispered apprehensively, "where's Ivan?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p38">"In the yard. He's got a headache. He's on the watch."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p39">"Give me that looking-glass. It stands over there. Give it me."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p40">Alyosha gave him a little round folding looking-glass which
						
						stood on the chest of drawers. The old man looked at himself in it;
						
						his nose was considerably swollen, and on the left side of his
						
						forehead there was a rather large crimson bruise.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p41">"What does Ivan say? Alyosha, my dear, my only son, I'm afraid
						
						of Ivan. I'm more afraid of Ivan than the other. You're the only one
						
						I'm not afraid of...."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p42">"Don't be afraid of Ivan either. He is angry, but he'll defend
						
						you."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p43">"Alyosha, and what of the other? He's run to Grushenka. My
						
						angel, tell me the truth, was she here just now or not?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p44">"No one has seen her. It was a mistake. She has not been here."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p45">"You know Mitya wants to marry her, to marry her."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p46">"She won't marry him."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p47">"She won't. She won't. She won't. She won't on any account!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p48">The old man fairly fluttered with joy, as though nothing more
						
						comforting could have been said to him. In his delight he seized
						
						Alyosha's hand and pressed it warmly to his heart. Tears positively
						
						glittered in his eyes.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p49">"That image of the Mother of God of which I was telling you just
						
						now," he said. "Take it home and keep it for yourself. And I'll let
						
						you go back to the monastery.... I was joking this morning, don't be
						
						angry with me. My head aches, Alyosha.... Alyosha, comfort my heart.
						
						Be an angel and tell me the truth!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p50">"You're still asking whether she has been here or not?" Alyosha
						
						said sorrowfully.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p51">"No, no, no. I believe you. I'll tell you what it is: you go to
						
						Grushenka yourself, or see her somehow; make haste and ask her; see
						
						for yourself, which she means to choose, him or me. Eh? What? Can
						
						you?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p52">"If I see her I'll ask her," Alyosha muttered, embarrassed.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p53">"No, she won't tell you," the old man interrupted, "she's a rogue.
						
						She'll begin kissing you and say that it's you she wants. She's a
						
						deceitful, shameless hussy. You mustn't go to her, you mustn't!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p54">"No father, and it wouldn't be suitable, it wouldn't be right at
						
						all."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p55">"Where was he sending you just now? He shouted 'Go' as he ran
						
						away."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p56">"For money? To ask her for money?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p57">"No. Not for money."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p58">"He's no money; not a farthing. I'll settle down for the night,
						
						and think things over, and you can go. Perhaps you'll meet her....
						
						Only be sure to come to me to-morrow in the morning. Be sure to. I
						
						have a word to say to you to-morrow. Will you come?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p59">"When you come, pretend you've come of your own accord to ask
						
						after me. Don't tell anyone I told you to. Don't say a word to Ivan."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p60">"Very well."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p61">"Good-bye, my angel. You stood up for me, just now. I shall never
						
						forget it. I've a word to say to you to-morrow- but I must think about
						
						it."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p62">"And how do you feel now?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p63">"I shall get up to-morrow and go out, perfectly well, perfectly
						
						well!"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p64">Crossing the yard Alyosha found Ivan sitting on the bench at the
						
						gateway. He was sitting writing something in pencil in his notebook.
						
						Alyosha told Ivan that their father had waked up, was conscious, and
						
						had let him go back to sleep at the monastery.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p65">"Alyosha, I should be very glad to meet you to-morrow morning,"
						
						said Ivan cordially, standing up. His cordiality was a complete
						
						surprise to Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p66">"I shall be at the Hohlakovs' to-morrow," answered Alyosha, "I may
						
						be at Katerina Ivanovna's, too, if I don't find her now."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p67">"But you're going to her now, anyway? For that 'compliments and
						
						farewell,'" said Ivan smiling. Alyosha was disconcerted.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p68">"I think I quite understand his exclamations just now, and part of
						
						what went before. Dmitri has asked you to go to her and say that he-
						
						well, in fact- takes his leave of her?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p69">"Brother, how will all this horror end between father and Dmitri?"
						
						exclaimed Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p70">"One can't tell for certain. Perhaps in nothing: it may all fizzle
						
						out. That woman is a beast. In any case we must keep the old man
						
						indoors and not let Dmitri in the house."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p71">"Brother, let me ask one thing more: has any man a right to look
						
						at other men and decide which is worthy to live?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p72">"Why bring in the question of worth? The matter is most often
						
						decided in men's hearts on other grounds much more natural. And as for
						
						rights- who has not the right to wish?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p73">"Not for another man's death?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p74">"What even if for another man's death? Why lie to oneself since
						
						all men live so and perhaps cannot help living so. Are you referring
						
						to what I said just now- that one reptile will devour the other? In
						
						that case let me ask you, do you think me like Dmitri capable of
						
						shedding Aesop's blood, murdering him, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="ix-p75">"What are you saying, Ivan? Such an idea never crossed my mind.
						
						I don't think Dmitri is capable of it, either."
						
							</p><p id="ix-p76">"Thanks, if only for that," smiled Ivan. "Be sure, I should always
						
						defend him. But in my wishes I reserve myself full latitude in this
						
						case. Good-bye till to-morrow. Don't condemn me, and don't look on
						
						me as a villain," he added with a smile.
						
							</p><p id="ix-p77">They shook hands warmly as they had never done before. Alyosha
						
						felt that his brother had taken the first step towards him, and that
						
						he had certainly done this with some definite motive.</p>
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 10 - Both Together" prev="ix" next="xi" id="x">
					
						<p id="x-p1">ALYOSHA left his father's house feeling even more exhausted and
						
						dejected in spirit than when he had entered it. His mind too seemed
						
						shattered and unhinged, while he felt that he was afraid to put
						
						together the disjointed fragments and form a general idea from all the
						
						agonising and conflicting experiences of the day. He felt something
						
						bordering upon despair, which he had never known till then. Towering
						
						like a mountain above all the rest stood the fatal, insoluble
						
						question: How would things end between his father and his brother
						
						Dmitri with this terrible woman? Now he had himself been a witness
						
						of it, he had been present and seen them face to face. Yet only his
						
						brother Dmitri could be made unhappy, terribly, completely unhappy:
						
						there was trouble awaiting him. It appeared too that there were
						
						other people concerned, far more so than Alyosha could have supposed
						
						before. There was something positively mysterious in it, too. Ivan had
						
						made a step towards him, which was what Alyosha had been long
						
						desiring. Yet now he felt for some reason that he was frightened at
						
						it. And these women? Strange to say, that morning he had set out for
						
						Katerina Ivanovna's in the greatest embarrassment; now he felt nothing
						
						of the kind. On the contrary, he was hastening there as though
						
						expecting to find guidance from her. Yet to give her this message
						
						was obviously more difficult than before. The matter of the three
						
						thousand was decided irrevocably, and Dmitri, feeling himself
						
						dishonoured and losing his last hope, might sink to any depth. He had,
						
						moreover, told him to describe to Katerina Ivanovna the scene which
						
						had just taken place with his father.
						
							</p><p id="x-p2">It was by now seven o'clock, and it was getting dark as Alyosha
						
						entered the very spacious and convenient house in the High Street
						
						occupied by Katerina Ivanovna. Alyosha knew that she lived with two
						
						aunts. One of them, a woman of little education, was that aunt of
						
						her half-sister Agafya Ivanovna who had looked after her in her
						
						father's house when she came from boarding-school. The other aunt
						
						was a Moscow lady of style and consequence, though in straitened
						
						circumstances. It was said that they both gave way in everything to
						
						Katerina Ivanovna, and that she only kept them with her as
						
						chaperons. Katerina Ivanovna herself gave way to no one but her
						
						benefactress, the general's widow, who had been kept by illness in
						
						Moscow, and to whom she was obliged to write twice a week a full
						
						account of all her doings.
						
							</p><p id="x-p3">When Alyosha entered the hall and asked the maid who opened the
						
						door to him to take his name up, it was evident that they were already
						
						aware of his arrival. Possibly he had been noticed from the window. At
						
						least, Alyosha heard a noise, caught the sound of flying footsteps and
						
						rustling skirts. Two or three women, perhaps, had run out of the room.
						
							Alyosha thought it strange that his arrival should cause such
						
						excitement. He was conducted, however, to the drawing-room at once. It
						
						was a large room, elegantly and amply furnished, not at all in
						
						provincial style. There were many sofas, lounges, settees, big and
						
						little tables. There were pictures on the walls, vases and lamps on
						
						the tables, masses of flowers, and even an aquarium in the window.
						
						It was twilight and rather dark. Alyosha made out a silk mantle thrown
						
						down on the sofa, where people had evidently just been sitting; and on
						
						a table in front of the sofa were two unfinished cups of chocolate,
						
						cakes, a glass saucer with blue raisins, and another with
						
						sweetmeats. Alyosha saw that he had interrupted visitors, and frowned.
						
						But at that instant the portiere was raised, and with rapid,
						
						hurrying footsteps Katerina Ivanovna came in, holding out both hands
						
						to Alyosha with a radiant smile of delight. At the same instant a
						
						servant brought in two lighted candles and set them on the table.
						
							</p><p id="x-p4">"Thank God! At last you have come too! I've been simply praying
						
						for you all day! Sit down."
						
							</p><p id="x-p5">Alyosha had been struck by Katerina Ivanovna's beauty when,
						
						three weeks before, Dmitri had first brought him, at Katerina
						
						Ivanovna's special request, to be introduced to her. There had been no
						
						conversation between them at that interview, however. Supposing
						
						Alyosha to be very shy, Katerina Ivanovna had talked all the time to
						
						Dmitri to spare him. Alyosha had been silent, but he had seen a
						
						great deal very clearly. He was struck by the imperiousness, proud
						
						ease, and self-confidence of the haughty girl. And all that was
						
						certain, Alyosha felt that he was not exaggerating it. He thought
						
						her great glowing black eyes were very fine, especially with her pale,
						
						even rather sallow, longish face. But in those eyes and in the lines
						
						of her exquisite lips there was something with which his brother might
						
						well be passionately in love, but which perhaps could not be loved for
						
						long. He expressed this thought almost plainly to Dmitri when, after
						
						the visit, his brother besought and insisted that he should not
						
						conceal his impressions on seeing his betrothed.
						
							</p><p id="x-p6">"You'll be happy with her, but perhaps not tranquilly happy."
						
							</p><p id="x-p7">"Quite so, brother. Such people remain always the same. They don't
						
						yield to fate. So you think I shan't love her for ever."
						
							</p><p id="x-p8">"No; perhaps you will love her for ever. But perhaps you won't
						
						always be happy with her."
						
							</p><p id="x-p9">Alyosha had given his opinion at the time, blushing, and angry
						
						with himself for having yielded to his brother's entreaties and put
						
						such "foolish" ideas into words. For his opinion had struck him as
						
						awfully foolish immediately after he had uttered it. He felt ashamed
						
						too of having given so confident an opinion about a woman. It was with
						
						the more amazement that he felt now, at the first glance at Katerina
						
						Ivanovna as she ran in to him, that he had perhaps been utterly
						
						mistaken. This time her face was beaming with spontaneous good-natured
						
						kindliness, and direct warm-hearted sincerity. The "pride and
						
						haughtiness," which had struck Alyosha so much before, was only
						
						betrayed now in a frank, generous energy and a sort of bright,
						
						strong faith in herself. Alyosha realised at the first glance, at
						
						the first word, that all the tragedy of her position in relation to
						
						the man she loved so dearly was no secret to her; that she perhaps
						
						already knew everything, positively everything. And yet, in spite of
						
						that, there was such brightness in her face, such faith in the future.
						
						Alyosha felt at once that he had gravely wronged her in his
						
						thoughts. He was conquered and captivated immediately. Besides all
						
						this, he noticed at her first words that she was in great
						
						excitement, an excitement perhaps quite exceptional and almost
						
						approaching ecstasy.
						
							</p><p id="x-p10">"I was so eager to see you, because I can learn from you the whole
						
						truth- from you and no one else."
						
							</p><p id="x-p11">"I have come," muttered Alyosha confusedly, "I- he sent me."
						
							</p><p id="x-p12">"Ah, he sent you I foresaw that. Now I know everything-
						
						everything!" cried Katerina Ivanovna, her eyes flashing. "Wait a
						
						moment, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I'll tell you why I've been so longing to
						
						see you. You see, I know perhaps far more than you do yourself, and
						
						there's no need for you to tell me anything. I'll tell you what I want
						
						from you. I want to know your own last impression of him. I want you
						
						to tell me most directly, plainly, coarsely even (oh, as coarsely as
						
						you like!), what you thought of him just now and of his position after
						
						your meeting with him to-day. That will perhaps be better than if I
						
						had a personal explanation with him, as he does not want to come to
						
						me. Do you understand what I want from you? Now, tell me simply,
						
						tell me every word of the message he sent you with (I knew he would
						
						send you)."
						
							</p><p id="x-p13">"He told me to give you his compliments and to say that he would
						
						never come again but to give you his compliments."
						
							</p><p id="x-p14">"His compliments? Was that what he said his own expression?"
						
							</p><p id="x-p15">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="x-p16">"Accidentally perhaps he made a mistake in the word, perhaps he
						
						did not use the right word?"
						
							</p><p id="x-p17">"No; he told me precisely to repeat that word. He begged me two or
						
						three times not to forget to say so."
						
							</p><p id="x-p18">Katerina Ivanovna flushed hotly.
						
							</p><p id="x-p19">"Help me now, Alexey Fyodorovitch. Now I really need your help.
						
						I'll tell you what I think, and you must simply say whether it's right
						
						or not. Listen! If he had sent me his compliments in passing,
						
						without insisting on your repeating the words, without emphasising
						
						them, that would be the end of everything! But if he particularly
						
						insisted on those words, if he particularly told you not to forget
						
						to repeat them to me, then perhaps he was in excitement, beside
						
						himself. He had made his decision and was frightened at it. He
						
						wasn't walking away from me with a resolute step, but leaping
						
						headlong. The emphasis on that phrase may have been simply bravado."
						
							</p><p id="x-p20">"Yes, yes!" cried Alyosha warmly. "I believe that is it."
						
							</p><p id="x-p21">"And, if so, he's not altogether lost. I can still save him. Stay!
						
						Did he not tell you anything about money- about three thousand
						
						roubles?"
						
							</p><p id="x-p22">"He did speak about it, and it's that more than anything that's
						
						crushing him. He said he had lost his honour and that nothing
						
						matters now," Alyosha answered warmly, feeling a rush of hope in his
						
						heart and believing that there really might be a way of escape and
						
						salvation for his brother. "But do you know about the money?" he
						
						added, and suddenly broke off.
						
							</p><p id="x-p23">"I've known of it a long time; I telegraphed to Moscow to inquire,
						
						and heard long ago that the money had not arrived. He hadn't sent
						
						the money, but I said nothing. Last week I learnt that he was still in
						
						need of money. My only object in all this was that he should know to
						
						whom to turn, and who was his true friend. No, he won't recognise that
						
						I am his truest friend; he won't know me, and looks on me merely as
						
						a woman. I've been tormented all the week, trying to think how to
						
						prevent him from being ashamed to face me because he spent that
						
						three thousand. Let him feel ashamed of himself, let him be ashamed of
						
						other people's knowing, but not of my knowing. He can tell God
						
						everything without shame. Why is it he still does not understand how
						
						much I am ready to bear for his sake? Why, why doesn't he know me? How
						
						dare he not know me after all that has happened? I want to save him
						
						for ever. Let him forget me as his betrothed. And here he fears that
						
						he is dishonoured in my eyes. Why, he wasn't afraid to be open with
						
						you, Alexey Fyodorovitch. How is it that I don't deserve the same?"
						
							</p><p id="x-p24">The last words she uttered in tears. Tears gushed from her eyes.
						
							</p><p id="x-p25">"I must tell you," Alyosha began, his voice trembling too, "what
						
						happened just now between him and my father."
						
							And he described the whole scene, how Dmitri had sent him to get
						
						the money, how he had broken in, knocked his father down, and after
						
						that had again specially and emphatically begged him to take his
						
						compliments and farewell. "He went to that woman," Alyosha added
						
						softly.
						
							</p><p id="x-p26">"And do you suppose that I can't put up with that woman? Does he
						
						think I can't? But he won't marry her," she suddenly laughed
						
						nervously. "Could such a passion last for ever in a Karamazov? It's
						
						passion, not love. He won't marry her because she won't marry him."
						
						Again Katerina Ivanovna laughed strangely.
						
							</p><p id="x-p27">"He may marry her," said Alyosha mournfully, looking down.
						
							</p><p id="x-p28">"He won't marry her, I tell you. That girl is an angel. Do you
						
						know that? Do you know that?" Katerina Ivanovna exclaimed suddenly
						
						with extraordinary warmth. "She is one of the most fantastic of
						
						fantastic creatures. I know how bewitching she is, but I know too that
						
						she is kind, firm, and noble. Why do you look at me like that,
						
						Alexey Fyodorovitch? Perhaps you are wondering at my words, perhaps
						
						you don't believe me? Agrafena Alexandrovna, my angel!" she cried
						
						suddenly to someone, peeping into the next room, "come in to us.
						
						This is a friend. This is Alyosha. He knows all about our affairs.
						
						Show yourself to him."
						
							</p><p id="x-p29">"I've only been waiting behind the curtain for you to call me,"
						
						said a soft, one might even say sugary, feminine voice.
						
							</p><p id="x-p30">The portiere was raised and Grushenka herself, smiling and
						
						beaming, came up to the table. A violent revulsion passed over
						
						Alyosha. He fixed his eyes on her and could not take them off. Here
						
						she was, that awful woman, the "beast," as Ivan had called her half an
						
						hour before. And yet one would have thought the creature standing
						
						before him most simple and ordinary, a good-natured, kind woman,
						
						handsome certainly, but so like other handsome ordinary women! It is
						
						true she was very, very good-looking with that Russian beauty so
						
						passionately loved by many men. She was a rather tall woman, though
						
						a little shorter than Katerina Ivanovna, who was exceptionally tall.
						
						She had a full figure, with soft, as it were, noiseless, movements,
						
						softened to a peculiar over-sweetness, like her voice. She moved,
						
						not like Katerina Ivanovna, with a vigorous, bold step, but
						
						noiselessly. Her feet made absolutely no sound on the floor. She
						
						sank softly into a low chair, softly rustling her sumptuous black silk
						
						dress, and delicately nestling her milk-white neck and broad shoulders
						
						in a costly cashmere shawl. She was twenty-two years old, and her face
						
						looked exactly that age. She was very white in the face, with a pale
						
						pink tint on her cheeks. The modelling of her face might be said to be
						
						too broad, and the lower jaw was set a trifle forward. Her upper lip
						
						was thin, but the slightly prominent lower lip was at least twice as
						
						full, and looked pouting. But her magnificent, abundant dark brown
						
						hair, her sable-coloured eyebrows and charming greyblue eyes with
						
						their long lashes would have made the most indifferent person, meeting
						
						her casually in a crowd in the street, stop at the sight of her face
						
						and remember it long after. What struck Alyosha most in that face
						
						was its expression of childlike good nature. There was a childlike
						
						look in her eyes, a look of childish delight. She came up to the
						
						table, beaming with delight and seeming to expect something with
						
						childish, impatient, and confiding curiosity. The light in her eyes
						
						gladdened the soul- Alyosha felt that. There was something else in her
						
						which he could not understand, or would not have been able to
						
						define, and which yet perhaps unconsciously affected him. It was
						
						that softness, that voluptuousness of her bodily movements, that
						
						catlike noiselessness. Yet it was a vigorous, ample body. Under the
						
						shawl could be seen full broad shoulders, a high, still quite
						
						girlish bosom. Her figure suggested the lines of the Venus of Milo,
						
						though already in somewhat exaggerated proportions. That could be
						
						divined. Connoisseurs of Russian beauty could have foretold with
						
						certainty that this fresh, still youthful beauty would lose its
						
						harmony by the age of thirty, would "spread"; that the face would
						
						become puffy, and that wrinkles would very soon appear upon her
						
						forehead and round the eyes; the complexion would grow coarse and
						
						red perhaps- in fact, that it was the beauty of the moment, the
						
						fleeting beauty which is so often met with in Russian women.
						
						Alyosha, of course, did not think of this; but though he was
						
						fascinated, yet he wondered with an unpleasant sensation, and as it
						
						were regretfully, why she drawled in that way and could not speak
						
						naturally. She did so, evidently feeling there was a charm in the
						
						exaggerated, honeyed modulation of the syllables. It was, of course,
						
						only a bad, underbred habit that showed bad education and a false idea
						
						of good manners. And yet this intonation and manner of speaking
						
						impressed Alyosha as almost incredibly incongruous with the childishly
						
						simple and happy expression of her face, the soft, babyish joy in
						
						her eyes. Katerina Ivanovna at once made her sit down in an
						
						arm-chair facing Alyosha, and ecstatically kissed her several times on
						
						her smiling lips. She seemed quite in love with her.
						
							"This is the first time we've met, Alexey Fyodorovitch," she
						
						said rapturously. "I wanted to know her, to see her. I wanted to go to
						
						her, but I'd no sooner expressed the wish than she came to me. I
						
						knew we should settle everything together- everything. My heart told
						
						me so- I was begged not to take the step, but I foresaw it would be
						
						a way out of the difficulty, and I was not mistaken. Grushenka has
						
						explained everything to me, told me all she means to do. She flew here
						
						like an angel of goodness and brought us peace and joy."
						
							</p><p id="x-p31">"You did not disdain me, sweet, excellent young lady," drawled
						
						Grushenka in her singsong voice, still with the same charming smile of
						
						delight.
						
							</p><p id="x-p32">"Don't dare to speak to me like that, you sorceress, you witch!
						
						Disdain you! Here, I must kiss your lower lip once more. It looks as
						
						though it were swollen, and now it will be more so, and more and more.
						
						Look how she laughs, Alexey Fyodorovitch!
						
							</p><p id="x-p33">Alyosha flushed, and faint, imperceptible shivers kept running
						
						down him.
						
							</p><p id="x-p34">"You make so much of me, dear young lady, and perhaps I am not
						
						at all worthy of your kindness."
						
							</p><p id="x-p35">"Not worthy! She's not worthy of it!" Katerina Ivanovna cried
						
						again with the same warmth. "You know, Alexey Fyodorovitch, we're
						
						fanciful, we're self-willed, but proudest of the proud in our little
						
						heart. We're noble, we're generous, Alexey Fyodorovitch, let me tell
						
						you. We have only been unfortunate. We were too ready to make every
						
						sacrifice for an unworthy, perhaps, or fickle man. There was one
						
						man- one, an officer too, we loved him, we sacrificed everything to
						
						him. That was long ago, five years ago, and he has forgotten us, he
						
						has married. Now he is a widower, he has written, he is coming here,
						
						and, do you know, we've loved him, none but him, all this time, and
						
						we've loved him all our life! He will come, and Grushenka will be
						
						happy again. For the last five years she's been wretched. But who
						
						can reproach her, who can boast of her favour? Only that bedridden old
						
						merchant, but he is more like her father, her friend, her protector.
						
						He found her then in despair, in agony, deserted by the man she loved.
						
						She was ready to drown herself then, but the old merchant saved her-
						
						saved her!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p36">"You defend me very kindly, dear young lady. You are in a great
						
						hurry about everything," Grushenka drawled again.
						
							</p><p id="x-p37">"Defend you! Is it for me to defend you? Should I dare to defend
						
						you? Grushenka, angel, give me your hand. Look at that charming soft
						
						little hand, Alexey Fyodorovitch! Look at it! It has brought me
						
						happiness and has lifted me up, and I'm going to kiss it, outside
						
						and inside, here, here, here!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p38">And three times she kissed the certainly charming, though rather
						
						fat, hand of Grushenka in a sort of rapture. She held out her hand
						
						with a charming musical, nervous little laugh, watched the "sweet
						
						young lady," and obviously liked having her hand kissed.
						
							</p><p id="x-p39">"Perhaps there's rather too much rapture," thought Alyosha. He
						
						blushed. He felt a peculiar uneasiness at heart the whole time.
						
							</p><p id="x-p40">"You won't make me blush, dear young lady, kissing my hand like
						
						this before Alexey Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="x-p41">"Do you think I meant to make you blush?" said Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, somewhat surprised. "Ah my dear, how little you understand
						
						me!
						
							</p><p id="x-p42">"Yes, and you too perhaps quite misunderstand me, dear young lady.
						
						Maybe I'm not so good as I seem to you. I've a bad heart; I will
						
						have my own way. I fascinated poor Dmitri Fyodorovitch that day simply
						
						for fun."
						
							</p><p id="x-p43">"But now you'll save him. You've given me your word. You'll
						
						explain it all to him. You'll break to him that you have long loved
						
						another man, who is now offering you his hand."
						
							</p><p id="x-p44">"Oh, no I didn't give you my word to do that. It was you kept
						
						talking about that. I didn't give you my word."
						
							</p><p id="x-p45">"Then I didn't quite understand you," said Katerina Ivanovna
						
						slowly, turning a little pale. "You promised-"
						
							</p><p id="x-p46">"Oh no, angel lady, I've promised nothing," Grushenka
						
						interrupted softly and evenly, still with the same gay and simple
						
						expression. "You see at once, dear young lady, what a wilful wretch
						
						I am compared with you. If I want to do a thing I do it. I may have
						
						made you some promise just now. But now again I'm thinking: I may take
						
						Mitya again. I liked him very much once- liked him for almost a
						
						whole hour. Now maybe I shall go and tell him to stay with me from
						
						this day forward. You see, I'm so changeable."
						
							</p><p id="x-p47">"Just now you said- something quite different," Katerina
						
						Ivanovna whispered faintly.
						
							</p><p id="x-p48">"Ah, just now! But, you know, I'm such a soft-hearted, silly
						
						creature. Only think what he's gone through on my account! What if
						
						when I go home I feel sorry for him? What then?"
						
							</p><p id="x-p49">"I never expected-"
						
							</p><p id="x-p50">"Ah, young lady, how good and generous you are compared with me!
						
						Now perhaps you won't care for a silly creature like me, now you
						
						know my character. Give me your sweet little hand, angelic lady,"
						
						she said tenderly, and with a sort of reverence took Katerina
						
						Ivanovna's hand.
						
							</p><p id="x-p51">"Here, dear young lady, I'll take your hand and kiss it as you did
						
						mine. You kissed mine three times, but I ought to kiss yours three
						
						hundred times to be even with you. Well, but let that pass. And then
						
						it shall be as God wills. Perhaps I shall be your slave entirely and
						
						want to do your bidding like a slave. Let it be as God wills,
						
						without any agreements and promises. What a sweet hand- what a sweet
						
						hand you have! You sweet young lady, you incredible beauty!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p52">She slowly raised the hands to her lips, with the strange object
						
						indeed of "being even" with her in kisses.
						
							</p><p id="x-p53">Katerina Ivanovna did not take her hand away. She listened with
						
						timid hope to the last words, though Grushenka's promise to do her
						
						bidding like a slave was very strangely expressed. She looked intently
						
						into her eyes; she still saw in those eyes the same simple-hearted,
						
						confiding expression, the same bright gaiety.
						
							</p><p id="x-p54">"She's perhaps too naive," thought Katerina Ivanovna, with a gleam
						
						of hope.
						
							</p><p id="x-p55">Grushenka meanwhile seemed enthusiastic over the "sweet hand." She
						
						raised it deliberately to her lips. But she held it for two or three
						
						minutes near her lips, as though reconsidering something.
						
							</p><p id="x-p56">"Do you know, angel lady," she suddenly drawled in an even more
						
						soft and sugary voice, "do you know, after all, I think I won't kiss
						
						your hand?" And she laughed a little merry laugh.
						
							</p><p id="x-p57">"As you please. What's the matter with you?" said Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, starting suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="x-p58">"So that you may be left to remember that you kissed my hand,
						
						but I didn't kiss yours."
						
							</p><p id="x-p59">There was a sudden gleam in her eyes. She looked with awful
						
						intentness at Katerina Ivanovna.
						
							</p><p id="x-p60">"Insolent creature!" cried Katerina Ivanovna, as though suddenly
						
						grasping something. She flushed all over and leapt up from her seat.
						
							</p><p id="x-p61">Grushenka too got up, but without haste.
						
							</p><p id="x-p62">"So I shall tell Mitya how you kissed my hand, but I didn't kiss
						
						yours at all. And how he will laugh!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p63">"Vile slut! Go away!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p64">"Ah, for shame, young lady! Ah, for shame! That's unbecoming for
						
						you, dear young lady, a word like that."
						
							</p><p id="x-p65">"Go away! You're a creature for sale" screamed Katerina
						
						Ivanovna. Every feature was working in her utterly distorted face.
						
							</p><p id="x-p66">"For sale indeed! You used to visit gentlemen in the dusk for
						
						money once; you brought your beauty for sale. You see, I know."
						
							</p><p id="x-p67">Katerina Ivanovna shrieked, and would have rushed at her, but
						
						Alyosha held her with all his strength.
						
							</p><p id="x-p68">"Not a step, not a word! Don't speak, don't answer her. She'll
						
						go away- she'll go at once."
						
							</p><p id="x-p69">At that instant Katerina Ivanovna's two aunts ran in at her cry,
						
						and with them a maid-servant. All hurried to her.
						
							</p><p id="x-p70">"I will go away," said Grushenka, taking up her mantle from the
						
						sofa. "Alyosha, darling, see me home!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p71">"Go away- go away, make haste!" cried Alyosha, clasping his
						
						hands imploringly.
						
							</p><p id="x-p72">"Dear little Alyosha, see me home! I've got a pretty little
						
						story to tell you on the way. I got up this scene for your benefit,
						
						Alyosha. See me home, dear, you'll be glad of it afterwards."
						
							</p><p id="x-p73">Alyosha turned away, wringing his hands. Grushenka ran out of
						
						the house, laughing musically.
						
							</p><p id="x-p74">Katerina Ivanovna went into a fit of hysterics. She sobbed, and
						
						was shaken with convulsions. Everyone fussed round her.
						
							</p><p id="x-p75">"I warned you," said the elder of her aunts. "I tried to prevent
						
						your doing this. You're too impulsive. How could you do such a
						
						thing? You don't know these creatures, and they say she's worse than
						
						any of them. You are too self-willed."
						
							</p><p id="x-p76">"She's a tigress!" yelled Katerina Ivanovna. "Why did you hold me,
						
						Alexey Fyodorovitch? I'd have beaten her- beaten her!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p77">She could not control herself before Alyosha; perhaps she did
						
						not care to, indeed.
						
							</p><p id="x-p78">"She ought to be flogged in public on a scaffold!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p79">Alyosha withdrew towards the door.
						
							</p><p id="x-p80">"But, my God!" cried Katerina Ivanovna, clasping her hands. "He!
						
						He! He could be so dishonourable, so inhuman! Why, he told that
						
						creature what happened on that fatal, accursed day! 'You brought
						
						your beauty for sale, dear young lady.' She knows it! Your brother's a
						
						scoundrel, Alexey Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="x-p81">Alyosha wanted to say something, but he couldn't find a word.
						
						His heart ached.
						
							</p><p id="x-p82">"Go away, Alexey Fyodorovitch! It's shameful, it's awful for me!
						
						To-morrow, I beg you on my knees, come to-morrow. Don't condemm me.
						
						Forgive me. I don't know what I shall do with myself now!"
						
							</p><p id="x-p83">Alyosha walked out into the street reeling. He could have wept
						
						as she did. Suddenly he was overtaken by the maid.
						
							</p><p id="x-p84">"The young lady forgot to give you this letter from Madame
						
						Hohlakov; it's been left with us since dinner-time."
						
							</p><p id="x-p85">Alyosha took the little pink envelope mechanically and put it,
						
						almost unconsciously, into his pocket.	</p>				
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 11 - Another Reputation Ruined" prev="x" next="ii_4" id="xi">
					
					   <p id="xi-p1">IT was not much more than three-quarters of a mile from the town
						
						to the monastery. Alyosha walked quickly along the road, at that
						
						hour deserted. It was almost night, and too dark to see anything
						
						clearly at thirty paces ahead. There were cross-roads half-way. A
						
						figure came into sight under a solitary willow at the cross-roads.
						
						As soon as Alyosha reached the cross-roads the figure moved out and
						
						rushed at him, shouting savagely:
						
							</p><p id="xi-p2">"Your money or your life!"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p3">"So it's you, Mitya," cried Alyosha, in surprise, violently
						
						startled however.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p4">"Ha ha ha! You didn't expect me? I wondered where to wait for you.
						
						By her house? There are three ways from it, and I might have missed
						
						you. At last I thought of waiting here, for you had to pass here,
						
						there's no other way to the monastery. Come, tell me the truth.
						
						Crush me like a beetle. But what's the matter?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p5">"Nothing, brother- it's the fright you gave me. Oh, Dmitri!
						
						Father's blood just now." (Alyosha began to cry, he had been on the
						
						verge of tears for a long time, and now something seemed to snap in
						
						his soul.) "You almost killed him- cursed him- and now- here- you're
						
						making jokes- 'Your money or your life!'"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p6">"Well, what of that? It's not seemly- is that it? Not suitable
						
						in my position?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p7">"No- I only-"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p8">"Stay. Look at the night. You see what a dark night, what
						
						clouds, what a wind has risen. I hid here under the willow waiting for
						
						you. And as God's above, I suddenly thought, why go on in misery any
						
						longer, what is there to wait for? Here I have a willow, a
						
						handkerchief, a shirt, I can twist them into a rope in a minute, and
						
						braces besides, and why go on burdening the earth, dishonouring it
						
						with my vile presence? And then I heard you coming- Heavens, it was as
						
						though something flew down to me suddenly. So there is a man, then,
						
						whom I love. Here he is, that man, my dear little brother, whom I love
						
						more than anyone in the world, the only one I love in the world. And I
						
						loved you so much, so much at that moment that I thought, 'I'll fall
						
						on his neck at once.' Then a stupid idea struck me, to have a joke
						
						with you and scare you. I shouted, like a fool, 'Your money!'
						
						Forgive my foolery- it was only nonsense, and there's nothing unseemly
						
						in my soul.... Damn it all, tell me what's happened. What did she say?
						
						Strike me, crush me, don't spare me! Was she furious?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p9">"No, not that.... There was nothing like that, Mitya. There- I
						
						found them both there."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p10">"Both? Whom?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p11">"Grushenka at Katerina Ivanovna's."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p12">Dmitri was struck dumb.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p13">"Impossible!" he cried. "You're raving! Grushenka with her?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p14">Alyosha described all that had happened from the moment he went in
						
						to Katerina Ivanovna's. He was ten minutes telling his story. can't be
						
						said to have told it fluently and consecutively, but he seemed to make
						
						it clear, not omitting any word or action of significance, and vividly
						
						describing, often in one word, his own sensations. Dmitri listened
						
						in silence, gazing at him with a terrible fixed stare, but it was
						
						clear to Alyosha that he understood it all, and had grasped every
						
						point. But as the story went on, his face became not merely gloomy,
						
						but menacing. He scowled, he clenched his teeth, and his fixed stare
						
						became still more rigid, more concentrated, more terrible, when
						
						suddenly, with incredible rapidity, his wrathful, savage face changed,
						
						his tightly compressed lips parted, and Dmitri Fyodorovitch broke into
						
						uncontrolled, spontaneous laughter. He literally shook with
						
						laughter. For a long time he could not speak.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p15">"So she wouldn't kiss her hand! So she didn't kiss it; so she
						
						ran away!" he kept exclaiming with hysterical delight; insolent
						
						delight it might had been called, if it had not been so spontaneous.
						
						"So the other one called her tigress! And a tigress she is! So she
						
						ought to be flogged on a scaffold? Yes, yes, so she ought. That's just
						
						what I think; she ought to have been long ago. It's like this,
						
						brother, let her be punished, but I must get better first. I
						
						understand the queen of impudence. That's her all over! You saw her
						
						all over in that hand-kissing, the she-devil! She's magnificent in her
						
						own line! So she ran home? I'll go- ah- I'll run to her! Alyosha,
						
						don't blame me, I agree that hanging is too good for her."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p16">"But Katerina Ivanovna!" exclaimed Alyosha sorrowfully.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p17">"I see her, too! I see right through her, as I've never done
						
						before! It's a regular discovery of the four continents of the
						
						world, that is, of the five! What a thing to do! That's just like
						
						Katya, who was not afraid to face a coarse, unmannerly officer and
						
						risk a deadly insult on a generous impulse to save her father! But the
						
						pride, the recklessness, the defiance of fate, the unbounded defiance!
						
						You say that aunt tried to stop her? That aunt, you know, is
						
						overbearing, herself. She's the sister of the general's widow in
						
						Moscow, and even more stuck-up than she. But her husband was caught
						
						stealing government money. He lost everything, his estate and all, and
						
						the proud wife had to lower her colours, and hasn't raised them since.
						
						So she tried to prevent Katya, but she wouldn't listen to her! She
						
						thinks she can overcome everything, that everything will give way to
						
						her. She thought she could bewitch Grushenka if she liked, and she
						
						believed it herself: she plays a part to herself, and whose fault is
						
						it? Do you think she kissed Grushenka's hand first, on purpose, with a
						
						motive? No, she really was fascinated by Grushenka, that's to say, not
						
						by Grushenka, but by her own dream, her own delusion- because it was
						
						her dream, her delusion! Alyosha, darling, how did you escape from
						
						them, those women? Did you pick up your cassock and run? Ha ha ha!"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p18">"Brother, you don't seem to have noticed how you've insulted
						
						Katerina Ivanovna by telling Grushenka about that day. And she flung
						
						it in her face just now that she had gone to gentlemen in secret to
						
						sell her beauty! Brother, what could be worse than that insult?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p19">What worried Alyosha more than anything was that, incredible as it
						
						seemed, his brother appeared pleased at Katerina Ivanovna's
						
						humiliation.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p20">"Bah!" Dmitri frowned fiercely, and struck his forehead with his
						
						hand. He only now realised it, though Alyosha had just told him of the
						
						insult, and Katerina Ivanovna's cry: "Your brother is a scoundrel"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p21">"Yes, perhaps, I really did tell Grushenka about that 'fatal day,'
						
						as Katya calls it. Yes, I did tell her, I remember! It was that time
						
						at Mokroe. I was drunk, the Gypsies were singing... But I was sobbing.
						
						I was sobbing then, kneeling and praying to Katya's image, and
						
						Grushenka understood it. She understood it all then. I remember, she
						
						cried herself.... Damn it all! But it's bound to be so now.... Then
						
						she cried, but now 'the dagger in the heart'! That's how women are."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p22">He looked down and sank into thought.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p23">"Yes, I am a scoundrel, a thorough scoundrel" he said suddenly, in
						
						a gloomy voice. "It doesn't matter whether I cried or not, I'm a
						
						scoundrel! Tell her I accept the name, if that's any comfort. Come,
						
						that's enough. Good-bye. It's no use talking! It's not amusing. You go
						
						your way and I mine. And I don't want to see you again except as a
						
						last resource. Good-bye, Alexey!"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p24">He warmly pressed Alyosha's hand, and still looking down,
						
						without raising his head, as though tearing himself away, turned
						
						rapidly towards the town.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p25">Alyosha looked after him, unable to believe he would go away so
						
						abruptly.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p26">"Stay, Alexey, one more confession to you alone" cried Dmitri,
						
						suddenly turning back. "Look at me. Look at me well. You see here,
						
						here- there's terrible disgrace in store for me." (As he said
						
						"here," Dmitri struck his chest with his fist with a strange air, as
						
						though the dishonour lay precisely on his chest, in some spot, in a
						
						pocket, perhaps, or hanging round his neck.) "You know me now, a
						
						scoundrel, an avowed scoundrel, but let me tell you that I've never
						
						done anything before and never shall again, anything that can
						
						compare in baseness with the dishonour which I bear now at this very
						
						minute on my breast, here, here, which will come to pass, though I'm
						
						perfectly free to stop it. I can stop it or carry it through, note
						
						that. Well, let me tell you, I shall carry it through. I shan't stop
						
						it. I told you everything just now, but I didn't tell you this,
						
						because even I had not brass enough for it. I can still pull up; if
						
						I do, I can give back the full half of my lost honour to-morrow. But I
						
						shan't pull up. I shall carry out my base plan, and you can bear
						
						witness that I told so beforehand. Darkness and destruction! No need
						
						to explain. You'll find out in due time. The filthy back-alley and the
						
						she-devil. Good-bye. Don't pray for me, I'm not worth it. And
						
						there's no need, no need at all.... I don't need it! Away!"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p27">And he suddenly retreated, this time finally. Alyosha went towards
						
						the monastery.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p28">"What? I shall never see him again! What is he saying?" he
						
						wondered wildly. "Why, I shall certainly see him to-morrow. I shall
						
						look him up. I shall make a point of it. What does he mean?"
						
							</p><p id="xi-p29">He went round the monastery, and crossed the pine-wood to the
						
						hermitage. The door was opened to him, though no one was admitted at
						
						that hour. There was a tremor in his heart as he went into Father
						
						Zossima's cell.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p30">"Why, why, had he gone forth? Why had he sent him into the
						
						world? Here was peace. Here was holiness. But there was confusion,
						
						there was darkness in which one lost one's way and went astray at
						
						once...."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p31">In the cell he found the novice Porfiry and Father Paissy, who
						
						came every hour to inquire after Father Zossima. Alyosha learnt with
						
						alarm that he was getting worse and worse. Even his usual discourse
						
						with the brothers could not take place that day. As a rule every
						
						evening after service the monks flocked into Father Zossima's cell,
						
						and all confessed aloud their sins of the day, their sinful thoughts
						
						and temptations; even their disputes, if there had been any. Some
						
						confessed kneeling. The elder absolved, reconciled, exhorted,
						
						imposed penance, blessed, and dismissed them. It was against this
						
						general "confession" that the opponents of "elders" protested,
						
						maintaining that it was a profanation of the sacrament of
						
						confession, almost a sacrilege, though this was quite a different
						
						thing. They even represented to the diocesan authorities that such
						
						confessions attained no good object, but actually to a large extent
						
						led to sin and temptation. Many of the brothers disliked going to
						
						the elder, and went against their own will because everyone went,
						
						and for fear they should be accused of pride and rebellious ideas.
						
						People said that some of the monks agreed beforehand, saying, "I'll
						
						confess I lost my temper with you this morning, and you confirm it,"
						
						simply in order to have something to say. Alyosha knew that this
						
						actually happened sometimes. He knew, too, that there were among the
						
						monks some who deep resented the fact that letters from relations were
						
						habitually taken to the elder, to be opened and read by him before
						
						those to whom they were addressed.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p32">It was assumed, of course, that all this was done freely, and in
						
						good faith, by way of voluntary submission and salutary guidance. But,
						
						in fact, there was sometimes no little insincerity, and much that
						
						was false and strained in this practice. Yet the older and more
						
						experienced of the monks adhered to their opinion, arguing that "for
						
						those who have come within these walls sincerely seeking salvation,
						
						such obedience and sacrifice will certainly be salutary and of great
						
						benefit; those, on the other hand, who find it irksome, and repine,
						
						are no true monks, and have made a mistake in entering the
						
						monastery- their proper place is in the world. Even in the temple
						
						one cannot be safe from sin and the devil. So it was no good taking it
						
						too much into account."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p33">"He is weaker, a drowsiness has come over him," Father Paissy
						
						whispered to Alyosha, as he blessed him. "It's difficult to rouse him.
						
						And he must not be roused. He waked up for five minutes, sent his
						
						blessing to the brothers, and begged their prayers for him at night.
						
						He intends to take the sacrament again in the morning. He remembered
						
						you, Alexey. He asked whether you had gone away, and was told that you
						
						were in the town. 'I blessed him for that work,' he said, 'his place
						
						is there, not here, for awhile.' Those were his words about you. He
						
						remembered you lovingly, with anxiety; do you understand how he
						
						honoured you? But how is it that he has decided that you shall spend
						
						some time in the world? He must have foreseen something in your
						
						destiny! Understand, Alexey, that if you return to the world, it
						
						must be to do the duty laid upon you by your elder, and not for
						
						frivolous vanity and worldly pleasures."
						
							</p><p id="xi-p34">Father Paissy went out. Alyosha had no doubt that Father Zossima
						
						was dying, though he might live another day or two. Alyosha firmly and
						
						ardently resolved that in spite of his promises to his father, the
						
						Hohlakovs, and Katerina Ivanovna, he would not leave the monastery
						
						next day, but would remain with his elder to the end. His heart glowed
						
						with love, and he reproached himself bitterly for having been able for
						
						one instant to forget him whom he had left in the monastery on his
						
						death bed, and whom he honoured above everyone in the world. He went
						
						into Father Zossima's bedroom, knelt down, and bowed to the ground
						
						before the elder, who slept quietly without stirring, with regular,
						
						hardly audible breathing and a peaceful face.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p35">Alyosha returned to the other room, where Father Zossima
						
						received his guests in the morning. Taking off his boots, he lay
						
						down on the hard, narrow, leathern sofa, which he had long used as a
						
						bed, bringing nothing but a pillow. The mattress, about which his
						
						father had shouted to him that morning, he had long forgotten to lie
						
						on. He took off his cassock, which he used as a covering. But before
						
						going to bed, he fell on his knees and prayed a long time. In his
						
						fervent prayer he did not beseech God to lighten his darkness but only
						
						thirsted for the joyous emotion, which always visited his soul after
						
						the praise and adoration, of which his evening prayer usually
						
						consisted. That joy always brought him light untroubled sleep. As he
						
						was praying, he suddenly felt in his pocket the little pink note the
						
						servant had handed him as he left Katerina Ivanovna's. He was
						
						disturbed, but finished his prayer. Then, after some hesitation, he
						
						opened the envelope. In it was a letter to him, signed by Lise, the
						
						young daughter of Madame Hohlakov, who had laughed at him before the
						
						elder in the morning.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p36">"Alexey Fyodorovitch," she wrote, "I am writing to you without
						
						anyone's knowledge, even mamma's, and I know how wrong it is. But I
						
						cannot live without telling you the feeling that has sprung up in my
						
						heart, and this no one but us two must know for a time. But how am I
						
						to say what I want so much to tell you? Paper, they say, does not
						
						blush, but I assure you it's not true and that it's blushing just as I
						
						am now, all over. Dear Alyosha, I love you, I've loved you from my
						
						childhood, since our Moscow days, when you were very different from
						
						what you are now, and I shall love you all my life. My heart has
						
						chosen you, to unite our lives, and pass them together till our old
						
						age. Of course, on condition that you will leave the monastery. As for
						
						our age we will wait for the time fixed by the law. By that time I
						
						shall certainly be quite strong, I shall be walking and dancing. There
						
						can be no doubt of that.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p37">"You see how I've thought of everything. There's only one thing
						
						I can't imagine: what you'll think of me when you read this. I'm
						
						always laughing and being naughty. I made you angry this morning,
						
						but I assure you before I took up my pen, I prayed before the Image of
						
						the Mother of God, and now I'm praying, and almost crying.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p38">"My secret is in your hands. When you come to-morrow, I don't know
						
						how I shall look at you. Ah, Alexey Fyodorovitch, what if I can't
						
						restrain myself like a silly and laugh when I look at you as I did
						
						to-day. You'll think I'm a nasty girl making fun of you, and you won't
						
						believe my letter. And so I beg you, dear one, if you've any pity
						
						for me, when you come to-morrow, don't look me straight in the face,
						
						for if I meet your eyes, it will be sure to make me laugh,
						
						especially as you'll be in that long gown. I feel cold all over when I
						
						think of it, so when you come, don't look at me at all for a time,
						
						look at mamma or at the window....
						
							</p><p id="xi-p39">"Here I've written you a love-letter. Oh, dear, what have I
						
						done? Alyosha, don't despise me, and if I've done something very
						
						horrid and wounded you, forgive me. Now the secret of my reputation,
						
						ruined perhaps for ever, is in your hands.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p40">"I shall certainly cry to-day. Good-bye till our meeting, our
						
						awful meeting.- Lise.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p41">"P.S.- Alyosha! You must, must, must come!- Lise.
						
							</p><p id="xi-p42">Alyosha read the note in amazement, read it through twice, thought
						
						a little, and suddenly laughed a soft, sweet laugh. He started. That
						
						laugh seemed to him sinful. But a minute later he laughed again just
						
						as softly and happily. He slowly replaced the note in the envelope,
						
						crossed himself and lay down. The agitation in his heart passed at
						
						once. "God, have mercy upon all of them, have all these unhappy and
						
						turbulent souls in Thy keeping, and set them in the right path. All
						
						ways are Thine. Save them according to Thy wisdom. Thou art love. Thou
						
						wilt send joy to all!" Alyosha murmured, crossing himself, and falling
						
						into peaceful sleep.</p>
					
					
					</div4>		  			
				</div3>
			
			</div2>

<div2 title="PART II" prev="xi" next="i_6" id="ii_4">

<div3 title="Book IV - Lacerations" prev="ii_4" next="i_7" id="i_6">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - Father Ferapont" prev="i_6" next="ii_5" id="i_7">
					
					
						<p id="i_7-p1">ALYOSHA was roused early, before daybreak. Father Zossima woke
						
						up feeling very weak, though he wanted to get out of bed and sit up in
						
						a chair. His mind was quite clear; his face looked very tired, yet
						
						bright and almost joyful. It wore an expression of gaiety, kindness
						
						and cordiality. "Maybe I shall not live through the coming day," he
						
						said to Alyosha. Then he desired to confess and take the sacrament
						
						at once. He always confessed to Father Paissy. After taking the
						
						communion, the service of extreme unction followed. The monks
						
						assembled and the cell was gradually filled up by the inmates of the
						
						hermitage. Meantime it was daylight. People began coming from the
						
						monastery. After the service was over the elder desired to kiss and
						
						take leave of everyone. As the cell was so small the earlier
						
						visitors withdrew to make room for others. Alyosha stood beside the
						
						elder, who was seated again in his arm-chair. He talked as much as
						
						he could. Though his voice was weak, it was fairly steady.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p2">"I've been teaching you so many years, and therefore I've been
						
						talking aloud so many years, that I've got into the habit of
						
						talking, and so much so that it's almost more difficult for me to hold
						
						my tongue than to talk, even now, in spite of my weakness, dear
						
						Fathers and brothers," he jested, looking with emotion at the group
						
						round him.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p3">Alyosha remembered afterwards something of what he said to them.
						
						But though he spoke out distinctly and his voice was fairly steady,
						
						his speech was somewhat disconnected. He spoke of many things, he
						
						seemed anxious before the moment of death to say everything he had not
						
						said in his life, and not simply for the sake of instructing them, but
						
						as though thirsting to share with all men and all creation his joy and
						
						ecstasy, and once more in his life to open his whole heart.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p4">"Love one another, Fathers," said Father Zossima, as far as
						
						Alyosha could remember afterwards. "Love God's people. Because we have
						
						come here and shut ourselves within these walls, we are no holier than
						
						those that are outside, but on the contrary, from the very fact of
						
						coming here, each of us has confessed to himself that he is worse than
						
						others, than all men on earth.... And the longer the monk lives in his
						
						seclusion, the more keenly he must recognise that. Else he would
						
						have had no reason to come here. When he realises that he is not
						
						only worse than others, but that he is responsible to all men for
						
						all and everything, for all human sins, national and individual,
						
						only then the aim of our seclusion is attained. For know, dear ones,
						
						that every one of us is undoubtedly responsible for all men- and
						
						everything on earth, not merely through the general sinfulness of
						
						creation, but each one personally for all mankind and every individual
						
						man. This knowledge is the crown of life for the monk and for every
						
						man. For monks are not a special sort of men, but only what all men
						
						ought to be. Only through that knowledge, our heart grows soft with
						
						infinite, universal, inexhaustible love. Then every one of you will
						
						have the power to win over the whole world by love and to wash away
						
						the sins of the world with your tears....Each of you keep watch over
						
						your heart and confess your sins to yourself unceasingly. Be not
						
						afraid of your sins, even when perceiving them, if only there be
						
						penitence, but make no conditions with God. Again, I say, be not
						
						proud. Be proud neither to the little nor to the great. Hate not those
						
						who reject you, who insult you, who abuse and slander you. Hate not
						
						the atheists, the teachers of evil, the materialists- and I mean not
						
						only the good ones- for there are many good ones among them,
						
						especially in our day- hate not even the wicked ones. Remember them in
						
						your prayers thus: Save, O Lord, all those who have none to pray for
						
						them, save too all those who will not pray. And add: it is not in
						
						pride that I make this prayer, O Lord, for I am lower than all men....
						
						Love God's people, let not strangers draw away the flock, for if you
						
						slumber in your slothfulness and disdainful pride, or worse still,
						
						in covetousness, they will come from all sides and draw away your
						
						flock. Expound the Gospel to the people unceasingly... be not
						
						extortionate.... Do not love gold and silver, do not hoard them....
						
						Have faith. Cling to the banner and raise it on high."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p5">But the elder spoke more disconnectedly than Alyosha reported
						
						his words afterwards. Sometimes he broke off altogether, as though
						
						to take breath and recover his strength, but he was in a sort of
						
						ecstasy. They heard him with emotion, though many wondered at his
						
						words and found them obscure.... Afterwards all remembered those
						
						words.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p6">When Alyosha happened for a moment to leave the cell, he was
						
						struck by the general excitement and suspense in the monks who were
						
						crowding about it. This anticipation showed itself in some by anxiety,
						
						in others by devout solemnity. All were expecting that some marvel
						
						would happen immediately after the elder's death. Their suspense
						
						was, from one point of view, almost frivolous, but even the most
						
						austere of the monks were affected by it. Father Paissy's face
						
						looked the gravest of all.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p7">Alyosha was mysteriously summoned by a monk to see Rakitin, who
						
						had arrived from town with a singular letter for him from Madame
						
						Hohlakov. In it she informed Alyosha of a strange and very opportune
						
						incident. It appeared that among the women who had come on the
						
						previous day to receive Father Zossima's blessing, there had been an
						
						old woman from the town, a sergeant's widow, called Prohorovna. She
						
						had inquired whether she might pray for the rest of the soul of her
						
						son, Vassenka, who had gone to Irkutsk, and had sent her no news for
						
						over a year. To which Father Zossima had answered sternly,
						
						forbidding her to do so, and saying that to pray for the living as
						
						though they were dead was a kind of sorcery. He afterwards forgave her
						
						on account of her ignorance, and added, "as though reading the book of
						
						the future" (this was Madame Hohlakov's expression), words of comfort:
						
						"that her son Vassya was certainly alive and he would either come
						
						himself very shortly or send a letter, and that she was to go home and
						
						expect him." And "Would you believe it?" exclaimed Madame Hohlakov
						
						enthusiastically, "the prophecy has been fulfilled literally indeed,
						
						and more than that." Scarcely had the old woman reached home when they
						
						gave her a letter from Siberia which had been awaiting her. But that
						
						was not all; in the letter written on the road from Ekaterinenburg,
						
						Vassya informed his mother that he was returning to Russia with an
						
						official, and that three weeks after her receiving the letter he hoped
						
						"to embrace his mother."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p8">Madame Hohlakov warmly entreated Alyosha to report this new
						
						"miracle of prediction" to the Superior and all the brotherhood. "All,
						
						all, ought to know of it" she concluded. The letter had been written
						
						in haste, the excitement of the writer was apparent in every line of
						
						it. But Alyosha had no need to tell the monks, for all knew of it
						
						already. Rakitin had commissioned the monk who brought his message "to
						
						inform most respectfully his reverence Father Paissy, that he,
						
						Rakitin, has a matter to speak of with him, of such gravity that he
						
						dare not defer it for a moment, and humbly begs forgiveness for his
						
						presumption." As the monk had given the message to Father Paissy,
						
						before that to Alyosha, the latter found after reading the letter,
						
						there was nothing left for him to do but to hand it to Father Paissy
						
						in confirmation of the story.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p9">And even that austere and cautious man, though he frowned as he
						
						read the news of the "miracle," could not completely restrain some
						
						inner emotion. His eyes gleamed, and a grave and solemn smile came
						
						into his lips.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p10">"We shall see greater things!" broke from him.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p11">"We shall see greater things, greater things yet!" the monks
						
						around repeated.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p12">But Father Paissy, frowning again, begged all of them, at least
						
						for a time, not to speak of the matter "till it be more fully
						
						confirmed, seeing there is so much credulity among those of this
						
						world, and indeed this might well have chanced naturally," he added,
						
						prudently, as it were to satisfy his conscience, though scarcely
						
						believing his own disavowal, a fact his listeners very clearly
						
						perceived.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p13">Within the hour the "miracle" was of course known to the whole
						
						monastery, and many visitors who had come for the mass. No one
						
						seemed more impressed by it than the monk who had come the day
						
						before from St. Sylvester, from the little monastery of Obdorsk in the
						
						far North. It was he who had been standing near Madame Hohlakov the
						
						previous day and had asked Father Zossima earnestly, referring to
						
						the "healing" of the lady's daughter, "How can you presume to do
						
						such things?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p14">He was now somewhat puzzled and did not know whom to believe.
						
						The evening before he had visited Father Ferapont in his cell apart,
						
						behind the apiary, and had been greatly impressed and overawed by
						
						the visit. This Father Ferapont was that aged monk so devout in
						
						fasting and observing silence who has been mentioned already, as
						
						antagonistic to Father Zossima and the whole institution of
						
						"elders," which he regarded as a pernicious and frivolous
						
						innovation. He was a very formidable opponent, although from his
						
						practice of silence he scarcely spoke a word to anyone. What made
						
						him formidable was that a number of monks fully shared his feeling,
						
						and many of the visitors looked upon him as a great saint and ascetic,
						
						although they had no doubt that he was crazy. But it was just his
						
						craziness attracted them.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p15">Father Ferapont never went to see the elder. Though he lived in
						
						the hermitage they did not worry him to keep its regulations, and this
						
						too because he behaved as though he were crazy. He was seventy-five or
						
						more, and he lived in a corner beyond the apiary in an old decaying
						
						wooden cell which had been built long ago for another great ascetic,
						
						Father Iona, who had lived to be a hundred and five, and of whose
						
						saintly doings many curious stories were still extant in the monastery
						
						and the neighbourhood.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p16">Father Ferapont had succeeded in getting himself installed in this
						
						same solitary cell seven years previously. It was simply a peasant's
						
						hut, though it looked like a chapel, for it contained an extraordinary
						
						number of ikons with lamps perpetually burning before them- which
						
						men brought to the monastery as offerings to God. Father Ferapont
						
						had been appointed to look after them and keep the lamps burning. It
						
						was said (and indeed it was true) that he ate only two pounds of bread
						
						in three days. The beekeeper, who lived close by the apiary, used to
						
						bring him the bread every three days, and even to this man who
						
						waited upon him, Father Ferapont rarely uttered a word. The four
						
						pounds of bread, together with the sacrament bread, regularly sent him
						
						on Sundays after the late mass by the Father Superior, made up his
						
						weekly rations. The water in his jug was changed every day. He
						
						rarely appeared at mass. Visitors who came to do him homage saw him
						
						sometimes kneeling all day long at prayer without looking round. If he
						
						addressed them, he was brief, abrupt, strange, and almost always rude.
						
						On very rare occasions, however, he would talk to visitors, but for
						
						the most part he would utter some one strange saying which was a
						
						complete riddle, and no entreaties would induce him to pronounce a
						
						word in explanation. He was not a priest, but a simple monk. There was
						
						a strange belief, chiefly, however, among the most ignorant, that
						
						Father Ferapont had communication with heavenly spirits and would only
						
						converse with them, and so was silent with men.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p17">The monk from Obdorsk, having been directed to the apiary by the
						
						beekeeper, who was also a very silent and surly monk, went to the
						
						corner where Father Ferapont's cell stood. "Maybe he will speak as you
						
						are a stranger and maybe you'll get nothing out of him," the beekeeper
						
						had warned him. The monk, as he related afterwards, approached in
						
						the utmost apprehension. It was rather late in the evening. Father
						
						Ferapont was sitting at the door of his cell on a low bench. A huge
						
						old elm was lightly rustling overhead. There was an evening
						
						freshness in the air. The monk from Obdorsk bowed down before the
						
						saint and asked his blessing.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p18">"Do you want me to bow down to you, monk?" said Father Ferapont.
						
						"Get up!"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p19">The monk got up.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p20">"Blessing, be blessed! Sit beside me. Where have you come from?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p21">What most struck the poor monk was the fact that in spite of his
						
						strict fasting and great age, Father Ferapont still looked a
						
						vigorous old man. He was tall, held himself erect, and had a thin, but
						
						fresh and healthy face. There was no doubt he still had considerable
						
						strength. He was of athletic build. In spite of his great age he was
						
						not even quite grey, and still had very thick hair and a full beard,
						
						both of which had once been black. His eyes were grey, large and
						
						luminous, but strikingly prominent. He spoke with a broad accent. He
						
						was dressed in a peasant's long reddish coat of coarse convict cloth
						
						(as it used to be called) and had a stout rope round his waist. His
						
						throat and chest were bare. Beneath his coat, his shirt of the
						
						coarsest linen showed almost black with dirt, not having been
						
						changed for months. They said that he wore irons weighing thirty
						
						pounds under his coat. His stockingless feet were thrust in old
						
						slippers almost dropping to pieces.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p22">"From the little Obdorsk monastery, from St. Sylvester," the
						
						monk answered humbly, whilst his keen and inquisitive, but rather
						
						frightened little eyes kept watch on the hermit.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p23">"I have been at your Sylvester's. I used to stay there. Is
						
						Sylvester well?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p24">The monk hesitated.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p25">"You are a senseless lot! How do you keep the fasts?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p26">"Our dietary is according to the ancient conventual rules.
						
						During Lent there are no meals provided for Monday, Wednesday, and
						
						Friday. For Tuesday and Thursday we have white bread, stewed fruit
						
						with honey, wild berries, or salt cabbage and whole meal stirabout. On
						
						Saturday white cabbage soup, noodles with peas, kasha, all with hemp
						
						oil. On weekdays we have dried fish and kasha with the cabbage soup.
						
						From Monday till Saturday evening, six whole days in Holy Week,
						
						nothing is cooked, and we have only bread and water, and that
						
						sparingly; if possible not taking food every day, just the same as
						
						is ordered for first week in Lent. On Good Friday nothing is eaten. In
						
						the same way on the Saturday we have to fast till three o'clock, and
						
						then take a little bread and water and drink a single cup of wine.
						
						On Holy Thursday we drink wine and have something cooked without oil
						
						or not cooked at all, inasmuch as the Laodicean council lays down
						
						for Holy Thursday: "It is unseemly by remitting the fast on the Holy
						
						Thursday to dishonour the whole of Lent!" This is how we keep the
						
						fast. But what is that compared with you, holy Father," added the
						
						monk, growing more confident, "for all the year round, even at Easter,
						
						you take nothing but bread and water, and what we should eat in two
						
						days lasts you full seven. It's truly marvellous- your great
						
						abstinence."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p27">"And mushrooms?" asked Father Ferapont, suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p28">"Mushrooms?" repeated the surprised monk.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p29">"Yes. I can give up their bread, not needing it at all, and go
						
						away into the forest and live there on the mushrooms or the berries,
						
						but they can't give up their bread here, wherefore they are in bondage
						
						to the devil. Nowadays the unclean deny that there is need of such
						
						fasting. Haughty and unclean is their judgment."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p30">"Och, true," sighed the monk.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p31">"And have you seen devils among them?" asked Ferapont.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p32">"Among them? Among whom?" asked the monk, timidly.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p33">"I went to the Father Superior on Trinity Sunday last year, I
						
						haven't been since. I saw a devil sitting on one man's chest hiding
						
						under his cassock, only his horns poked out; another had one peeping
						
						out of his pocket with such sharp eyes, he was afraid of me; another
						
						settled in the unclean belly of one, another was hanging round a man's
						
						neck, and so he was carrying him about without seeing him."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p34">"You- can see spirits?" the monk inquired.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p35">"I tell you I can see, I can see through them. When I was coming
						
						out from the Superior's I saw one hiding from me behind the door,
						
						and a big one, a yard and a half or more high, with a thick long
						
						grey tail, and the tip of his tail was in the crack of the door and
						
						I was quick and slammed the door, pinching his tail in it. He squealed
						
						and began to struggle, and I made the sign of the cross over him three
						
						times. And he died on the spot like a crushed spider. He must have
						
						rotted there in the corner and be stinking, but they don't see, they
						
						don't smell it. It's a year since I have been there. I reveal it to
						
						you, as you are a stranger."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p36">"Your words are terrible! But, holy and blessed father," said
						
						the monk, growing bolder and bolder, "is it true, as they noise abroad
						
						even to distant lands about you, that you are in continual
						
						communication with the Holy Ghost?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p37">"He does fly down at times."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p38">"How does he fly down? In what form?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p39">"As a bird."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p40">"The Holy Ghost in the form of a dove?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p41">"There's the Holy Ghost and there's the Holy Spirit. The Holy
						
						Spirit can appear as other birds- sometimes as a swallow, sometimes
						
						a goldfinch and sometimes as a blue-tit."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p42">"How do you know him from an ordinary tit?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p43">"He speaks."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p44">"How does he speak, in what language?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p45">"Human language."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p46">"And what does he tell you?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p47">"Why, to-day he told me that a fool would visit me and would ask
						
						me unseemly questions. You want to know too much, monk."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p48">"Terrible are your words, most holy and blessed Father," the
						
						monk shook his head. But there was a doubtful look in his frightened
						
						little eyes.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p49">"Do you see this tree?" asked Father Ferapont, after a pause.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p50">"I do, blessed Father."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p51">"You think it's an elm, but for me it has another shape."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p52">"What sort of shape?" inquired the monk, after a pause of vain
						
						expectation.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p53">"It happens at night. You see those two branches? In the night
						
						it is Christ holding out His arms to me and seeking me with those
						
						arms, I see it clearly and tremble. It's terrible, terrible!"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p54">"What is there terrible if it's Christ Himself?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p55">"Why, He'll snatch me up and carry me away."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p56">"Alive?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p57">"In the spirit and glory of Elijah, haven't you heard? He will
						
						take me in His arms and bear me away."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p58">Though the monk returned to the cell he was sharing with one of
						
						the brothers, in considerable perplexity of mind, he still cherished
						
						at heart a greater reverence for Father Ferapont than for Father
						
						Zossima. He was strongly in favour of fasting, and it was not
						
						strange that one who kept so rigid a fast as Father Ferapont should
						
						"see marvels." His words seemed certainly queer, but God only could
						
						tell what was hidden in those words, and were not worse words and acts
						
						commonly seen in those who have sacrificed their intellects for the
						
						glory of God? The pinching of the devil's tail he was ready and
						
						eager to believe, and not only in the figurative sense. Besides he
						
						had, before visiting the monastery, a strong prejudice against the
						
						institution of "elders," which he only knew of by hearsay and believed
						
						to be a pernicious innovation. Before he had been long at the
						
						monastery, he had detected the secret murmurings of some shallow
						
						brothers who disliked the institution. He was, besides, a
						
						meddlesome, inquisitive man, who poked his nose into everything.
						
						This was why the news of the fresh "miracle" performed by Father
						
						Zossima reduced him to extreme perplexity. Alyosha remembered
						
						afterwards how their inquisitive guest from Obdorsk had been
						
						continually flitting to and fro from one group to another, listening
						
						and asking questions among the monks that were crowding within and
						
						without the elder's cell. But he did not pay much attention to him
						
						at the time, and only recollected it afterwards.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p59">He had no thought to spare for it indeed, for when Father Zossima,
						
						feeling tired again, had gone back to bed, he thought of Alyosha as he
						
						was closing his eyes, and sent for him. Alyosha ran at once. There was
						
						no one else in the cell but Father Paissy, Father Iosif, and the
						
						novice Porfiry. The elder, opening his weary eyes and looking intently
						
						at Alyosha, asked him suddenly:
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p60">"Are your people expecting you, my son?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p61">Alyosha hesitated.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p62">"Haven't they need of you? Didn't you promise someone yesterday to
						
						see them to-day?"
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p63">"I did promise- to my father- my brothers- others too."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p64">"You see, you must go. Don't grieve. Be sure I shall not die
						
						without your being by to hear my last word. To you I will say that
						
						word, my son, it will be my last gift to you. To you, dear son,
						
						because you love me. But now go to keep your promise."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p65">Alyosha immediately obeyed, though it was hard to go. But the
						
						promise that he should hear his last word on earth, that it should
						
						be the last gift to him, Alyosha, sent a thrill of rapture through his
						
						soul. He made haste that he might finish what he had to do in the town
						
						and return quickly. Father Paissy, too, uttered some words of
						
						exhortation which moved and surprised him greatly. He spoke as they
						
						left the cell together.
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p66">"Remember, young man, unceasingly," Father Paissy began, without
						
						preface, "that the science of this world, which has become a great
						
						power, has, especially in the last century, analysed everything divine
						
						handed down to us in the holy books. After this cruel analysis the
						
						learned of this world have nothing left of all that was sacred of old.
						
						But they have only analysed the parts and overlooked the whole, and
						
						indeed their blindness is marvellous. Yet the whole still stands
						
						steadfast before their eyes, and the gates of hell shall not prevail
						
						against it. Has it not lasted nineteen centuries, is it not still a
						
						living, a moving power in the individual soul and in the masses of
						
						people? It is still as strong and living even in the souls of
						
						atheists, who have destroyed everything! For even those who have
						
						renounced Christianity and attack it, in their inmost being still
						
						follow the Christian ideal, for hitherto neither their subtlety nor
						
						the ardour of their hearts has been able to create a higher ideal of
						
						man and of virtue than the ideal given by Christ of old. When it has
						
						been attempted, the result has been only grotesque. Remember this
						
						especially, young man, since you are being sent into the world by your
						
						departing elder. Maybe, remembering this great day, you will not
						
						forget my words, uttered from the heart for your guidance, seeing
						
						you are young, and the temptations of the world are great and beyond
						
						your strength to endure. Well, now go, my orphan."
						
							</p><p id="i_7-p67">With these words Father Paissy blessed him. As Alyosha left the
						
						monastery and thought them over, he suddenly realised that he had
						
						met a new and unexpected friend, a warmly loving teacher, in this
						
						austere monk who had hitherto treated him sternly. It was as though
						
						Father Zossima had bequeathed him to him at his death, and "perhaps
						
						that's just what had passed between them," Alyosha thought suddenly.
						
						The philosophic reflections he had just heard so unexpectedly
						
						testified to the warmth of Father Paissy's heart. He was in haste to
						
						arm the boy's mind for conflict with temptation and to guard the young
						
						soul left in his charge with the strongest defence he could imagine.</p>
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - At His Father's" prev="i_7" next="iii_4" id="ii_5">
					
						<p id="ii_5-p1">FIRST of all, Alyosha went to his father. On the way he remembered
						
						that his father had insisted the day before that he should come
						
						without his brother Ivan seeing him. "Why so?" Alyosha wondered
						
						suddenly. "Even if my father has something to say to me alone, why
						
						should I go in unseen? Most likely in his excitement yesterday he
						
						meant to say something different," he decided. Yet he was very glad
						
						when Marfa Ignatyevna, who opened the garden gate to him (Grigory,
						
						it appeared, was ill in bed in the lodge), told him in answer to his
						
						question that Ivan Fyodorovitch had gone out two hours ago.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p2">"And my father?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p3">"He is up, taking his coffee," Marfa answered somewhat drily.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p4">Alyosha went in. The old man was sitting alone at the table
						
						wearing slippers and a little old overcoat. He was amusing himself
						
						by looking through some accounts, rather inattentively however. He was
						
						quite alone in the house, for Smerdyakov too had gone out marketing.
						
						Though he had got up early and was trying to put a bold face on it, he
						
						looked tired and weak. His forehead, upon which huge purple bruises
						
						had come out during the night, was bandaged with a red handkerchief;
						
						his nose too was swollen terribly in the night, and some smaller
						
						bruises covered it in patches, giving his whole face a peculiarly
						
						spiteful and irritable look. The old man was aware of this, and turned
						
						a hostile glance on Alyosha as he came in.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p5">"The coffee is cold," he cried harshly; "I won't offer you any.
						
						I've ordered nothing but a Lenten fish soup to-day, and I don't invite
						
						anyone to share it. Why have you come?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p6">"To find out how you are," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p7">"Yes. Besides, I told you to come yesterday. It's all of no
						
						consequence. You need not have troubled. But I knew you'd come
						
						poking in directly."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p8">He said this with almost hostile feeling. At the same time he
						
						got up and looked anxiously in the looking-glass (perhaps for the
						
						fortieth time that morning) at his nose. He began, too, binding his
						
						red handkerchief more becomingly on his forehead.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p9">"Red's better. It's just like the hospital in a white one," he
						
						observed sententiously. "Well, how are things over there? How is
						
						your elder?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p10">"He is very bad; he may die to-day," answered Alyosha. But his
						
						father had not listened, and had forgotten his own question at once.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p11">"Ivan's gone out," he said suddenly. "He is doing his utmost to
						
						carry off Mitya's betrothed. That's what he is staying here for," he
						
						added maliciously, and, twisting his mouth, looked at Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p12">"Surely he did not tell you so?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p13">"Yes, he did, long ago. Would you believe it, he told me three
						
						weeks ago? You don't suppose he too came to murder me, do you? He must
						
						have had some object in coming."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p14">"What do you mean? Why do you say such things?" said Alyosha,
						
						troubled.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p15">"He doesn't ask for money, it's true, but yet he won't get a
						
						farthing from me. I intend living as long as possible, you may as well
						
						know, my dear Alexey Fyodorovitch, and so I need every farthing, and
						
						the longer I live, the more I shall need it," he continued, pacing
						
						from one corner of the room to the other, keeping his hands in the
						
						pockets of his loose greasy overcoat made of yellow cotton material.
						
						"I can still pass for a man at five and fifty, but I want to pass
						
						for one for another twenty years. As I get older, you know, I shan't
						
						be a pretty object. The wenches won't come to me of their own
						
						accord, so I shall want my money. So I am saving up more and more,
						
						simply for myself, my dear son Alexey Fyodorovitch. You may as well
						
						know. For I mean to go on in my sins to the end, let me tell you.
						
						For sin is sweet; all abuse it, but all men live in it, only others do
						
						it on the sly, and I openly. And so all the other sinners fall upon me
						
						for being so simple. And your paradise, Alexey Fyodorovitch, is not to
						
						my taste, let me tell you that; and it's not the proper place for a
						
						gentleman, your paradise, even if it exists. I believe that I fall
						
						asleep and don't wake up again, and that's all. You can pray for my
						
						soul if you like. And if you don't want to, don't, damn you! That's my
						
						philosophy. Ivan talked well here yesterday, though we were all drunk.
						
						Ivan is a conceited coxcomb, but he has no particular learning...
						
						nor education either. He sits silent and smiles at one without
						
						speaking- that's what pulls him through."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p16">Alyosha listened to him in silence.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p17">"Why won't he talk to me? If he does speak, he gives himself airs.
						
						Your Ivan is a scoundrel! And I'll marry Grushenka in a minute if I
						
						want to. For if you've money, Alexey Fyodorovitch, you have only to
						
						want a thing and you can have it. That's what Ivan is afraid of, he is
						
						on the watch to prevent me getting married and that's why he is egging
						
						on Mitya to marry Grushenka himself. He hopes to keep me from
						
						Grushenka by that (as though I should leave him my money if I don't
						
						marry her!). Besides if Mitya marries Grushenka, Ivan will carry off
						
						his rich betrothed, that's what he's reckoning on! He is a
						
						scoundrel, your Ivan!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p18">"How cross you are! It's because of yesterday; you had better
						
						lie down," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p19">"There! you say that," the old man observed suddenly, as though it
						
						had struck him for the first time, "and I am not angry with you. But
						
						if Ivan said it, I should be angry with him. It is only with you I
						
						have good moments, else you know I am an ill-natured man."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p20">"You are not ill-natured, but distorted," said Alyosha with a
						
						smile.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p21">"Listen. I meant this morning to get that ruffian Mitya locked
						
						up and I don't know now what I shall decide about it. Of course in
						
						these fashionable days fathers and mothers are looked upon as a
						
						prejudice, but even now the law does not allow you to drag your old
						
						father about by the hair, to kick him in the face in his own house,
						
						and brag of murdering him outright- all in the presence of
						
						witnesses. If I liked, I could crush him and could have him locked
						
						up at once for what he did yesterday."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p22">"Then you don't mean to take proceedings?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p23">"Ivan has dissuaded me. I shouldn't care about Ivan, but there's
						
						another thing."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p24">And bending down to Alyosha, he went on in a confidential
						
						half-whisper.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p25">"If I send the ruffian to prison, she'll hear of it and run to see
						
						him at once. But if she hears that he has beaten me, a weak old man,
						
						within an inch of my life, she may give him up and come to me... For
						
						that's her way, everything by contraries. I know her through and
						
						through! Won't you have a drop of brandy? Take some cold coffee and
						
						I'll pour a quarter of a glass of brandy into it, it's delicious, my
						
						boy."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p26">"No, thank you. I'll take that roll with me if I may," said
						
						Alyosha, and taking a halfpenny French roll he put it in the pocket of
						
						his cassock. "And you'd better not have brandy, either," he
						
						suggested apprehensively, looking into the old man's face.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p27">"You are quite right, it irritates my nerves instead of soothing
						
						them. Only one little glass. I'll get it out of the cupboard."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p28">He unlocked the cupboard, poured out a glass, drank it, then
						
						locked the cupboard and put the key back in his pocket.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p29">"That's enough. One glass won't kill me."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p30">"You see you are in a better humour now," said Alyosha, smiling.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p31">"Um! I love you even without the brandy, but with scoundrels I
						
						am a scoundrel. Ivan is not going to Tchermashnya- why is that? He
						
						wants to spy how much I give Grushenka if she comes. They are all
						
						scoundrels! But I don't recognise Ivan, I don't know him at all. Where
						
						does he come from? He is not one of us in soul. As though I'd leave
						
						him anything! I shan't leave a will at all, you may as well know.
						
						And I'll crush Mitya like a beetle. I squash black-beetles at night
						
						with my slipper; they squelch when you tread on them. And your Mitya
						
						will squelch too. Your Mitya, for you love him. Yes you love him and I
						
						am not afraid of your loving him. But if Ivan loved him I should be
						
						afraid for myself at his loving him. But Ivan loves nobody. Ivan is
						
						not one of us. People like Ivan are not our sort, my boy. They are
						
						like a cloud of dust. When the wind blows, the dust will be gone.... I
						
						had a silly idea in my head when I told you to come to-day; I wanted
						
						to find out from you about Mitya. If I were to hand him over a
						
						thousand or maybe two now, would the beggarly wretch agree to take
						
						himself off altogether for five years or, better still, thirty-five,
						
						and without Grushenka, and give her up once for all, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p32">"I- I'll ask him," muttered Alyosha. "If you would give him
						
						three thousand, perhaps he-"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p33">"That's nonsense! You needn't ask him now, no need! I've changed
						
						my mind. It was a nonsensical idea of mine. I won't give him anything,
						
						not a penny, I want my money myself," cried the old man, waving his
						
						hand. "I'll crush him like a beetle without it. Don't say anything
						
						to him or else he will begin hoping. There's nothing for you to do
						
						here, you needn't stay. Is that betrothed of his, Katerina Ivanovna,
						
						whom he has kept so carefully hidden from me all this time, going to
						
						marry him or not? You went to see her yesterday, I believe?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p34">"Nothing will induce her to abandon him."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p35">"There you see how dearly these fine young ladies love a rake
						
						and a scoundrel. They are poor creatures I tell you, those pale
						
						young ladies, very different from- Ah, if I had his youth and the
						
						looks I had then (for I was better-looking than he at eight and
						
						twenty) I'd have been a conquering hero just as he is. He is a low
						
						cad! But he shan't have Grushenka, anyway, he shan't! I'll crush him!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p36">His anger had returned with the last words.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p37">"You can go. There's nothing for you to do here to-day," he
						
						snapped harshly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p38">Alyosha went up to say good-bye to him, and kissed him on the
						
						shoulder.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p39">"What's that for?" The old man was a little surprised. "We shall
						
						see each other again, or do you think we shan't?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p40">"Not at all, I didn't mean anything."
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p41">"Nor did I, I did not mean anything," said the old man, looking at
						
						him. "Listen, listen," he shouted after him, "make haste and come
						
						again and I'll have a fish soup for you, a fine one, not like
						
						to-day. Be sure to come! Come to-morrow, do you hear, to-morrow!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p42">And as soon as Alyosha had gone out of the door, he went to the
						
						cupboard again and poured out another half-glass.
						
							</p><p id="ii_5-p43">"I won't have more!" he muttered, clearing his throat, and again
						
						he locked the cupboard and put the key in his pocket. Then he went
						
						into his bedroom, lay down on the bed, exhausted, and in one minute he
						
						was asleep.		</p>			
										
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - A Meeting with the Schoolboys" prev="ii_5" next="iv_3" id="iii_4">
					
						<p id="iii_4-p1">"THANK goodness he did not ask me about Grushenka," thought
						
						Alyosha, as he left his father's house and turned towards Madame
						
						Hohlakov's, "or I might have had to tell him of my meeting with
						
						Grushenka yesterday."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p2">Alyosha felt painfully that since yesterday both combatants had
						
						renewed their energies, and that their hearts had grown hard again.
						
						"Father is spiteful and angry, he's made some plan and will stick to
						
						it. And what of Dmitri? He too will be harder than yesterday, he too
						
						must be spiteful and angry, and he too, no doubt, has made some
						
						plan. Oh, I must succeed in finding him to-day, whatever happens."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p3">But Alyosha had not long to meditate. An incident occurred on
						
						the road, which, though apparently of little consequence, made a great
						
						impression on him. just after he had crossed the square and turned the
						
						corner coming out into Mihailovsky Street, which is divided by a small
						
						ditch from the High Street (our whole town is intersected by ditches),
						
						he saw a group of schoolboys between the ages of nine and twelve, at
						
						the bridge. They were going home from school, some with their bags
						
						on their shoulders, others with leather satchels slung across them,
						
						some in short jackets, others in little overcoats. Some even had those
						
						high boots with creases round the ankles, such as little boys spoilt
						
						by rich fathers love to wear. The whole group was talking eagerly
						
						about something, apparently holding a council. Alyosha had never
						
						from his Moscow days been able to pass children without taking
						
						notice of them, and although he was particularly fond of children of
						
						three or thereabout, he liked schoolboys of ten and eleven too. And
						
						so, anxious as he was to-day, he wanted at once to turn aside to
						
						talk to them. He looked into their excited rosy faces, and noticed
						
						at once that all the boys had stones in their hands. Behind the
						
						ditch some thirty paces away, there was another schoolboy standing
						
						by a fence. He too had a satchel at his side. He was about ten years
						
						old, pale, delicate-looking and with sparkling black eyes. He kept
						
						an attentive and anxious watch on the other six, obviously his
						
						schoolfellows with whom he had just come out of school, but with
						
						whom he had evidently had a feud.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p4">Alyosha went up and, addressing a fair, curly-headed, rosy boy
						
						in a black jacket, observed:
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p5">"When I used to wear a satchel like yours, I always used to
						
						carry it on my left side, so as to have my right hand free, but you've
						
						got yours on your right side. So it will be awkward for you to get
						
						at it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p6">Alyosha had no art or premeditation in beginning with this
						
						practical remark. But it is the only way for a grown-up person to
						
						get at once into confidential relations with a child, or still more
						
						with a group of children. One must begin in a serious, businesslike
						
						way so as to be on a perfectly equal footing. Alyosha understood it by
						
						instinct.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p7">"But he is left-handed," another, a fine healthy-looking boy of
						
						eleven, answered promptly. All the others stared at Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p8">"He even throws stones with his left hand," observed a third.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p9">At that instant a stone flew into the group, but only just
						
						grazed the left-handed boy, though it was well and vigorously thrown
						
						by the boy standing on the other side of the ditch.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p10">"Give it him, hit him back, Smurov," they all shouted. But Smurov,
						
						the left-handed boy, needed no telling, and at once revenged
						
						himself; he threw a stone, but it missed the boy and hit the ground.
						
						The boy on the other side of the ditch, the pocket of whose coat was
						
						visibly bulging with stones, flung another stone at the group; this
						
						time it flew straight at Alyosha and hit him painfully on the
						
						shoulder.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p11">"He aimed it at you, he meant it for you. You are Karamazov,
						
						Karamazov!" the boys shouted laughing, "Come, all throw at him at
						
						once!" and six stones flew at the boy. One struck the boy on the
						
						head and he fell down, but at once leapt up and began ferociously
						
						returning their fire. Both sides threw stones incessantly. Many of the
						
						group had their pockets full too.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p12">"What are you about! Aren't you ashamed? Six against one! Why,
						
						you'll kill him," cried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p13">He ran forward and met the flying stones to screen the solitary
						
						boy. Three or four ceased throwing for a minute.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p14">"He began first!" cried a boy in a red shirt in an angry
						
						childish voice. "He is a beast, he stabbed Krassotkin in class the
						
						other day with a penknife. It bled. Krassotkin wouldn't tell tales,
						
						but he must be thrashed."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p15">"But what for? I suppose you tease him."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p16">"There, he sent a stone in your back again, he knows you," cried
						
						the children. "It's you he is throwing at now, not us. Come, all of
						
						you, at him again, don't miss, Smurov!" and again a fire of stones,
						
						and a very vicious one, began. The boy on the other side of the
						
						ditch was hit in the chest; he screamed, began to cry and ran away
						
						uphill towards Mihailovsky Street. They all shouted: "Aha, he is
						
						funking, he is running away. Wisp of tow!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p17">"You don't know what a beast he is, Karamazov, killing is too good
						
						for him," said the boy in the jacket, with flashing eyes. He seemed to
						
						be the eldest.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p18">"What's wrong with him?" asked Alyosha, "Is he a tell-tale or
						
						what?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p19">The boys looked at one another as though derisively.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p20">"Are you going that way, to Mihailovsky?" the same boy went on.
						
						"Catch him up.... You see he's stopped again, he is waiting and
						
						looking at you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p21">"He is looking at you," the other boys chimed in.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p22">"You ask him, does he like a dishevelled wisp of tow. Do you hear,
						
						ask him that!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p23">There was a general burst of laughter. Alyosha looked at them, and
						
						they at him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p24">"Don't go near him, he'll hurt you," cried Smurov in a warning
						
						voice.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p25">"I shan't ask him about the wisp of tow, for I expect you tease
						
						him with that question somehow. But I'll find out from him why you
						
						hate him so."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p26">"Find out then, find out," cried the boys laughing.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p27">Alyosha crossed the bridge and walked uphill by the fence,
						
						straight towards the boy.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p28">"You'd better look out," the boys called after him; "he won't be
						
						afraid of you. He will stab you in a minute, on the sly, as he did
						
						Krassotkin."
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p29">The boy waited for him without budging. Coming up to him,
						
						Alyosha saw facing him a child of about nine years old. He was an
						
						undersized weakly boy with a thin pale face, with large dark eyes that
						
						gazed at him vindictively. He was dressed in a rather shabby old
						
						overcoat, which he had monstrously outgrown. His bare arms stuck out
						
						beyond his sleeves. There was a large patch on the right knee of his
						
						trousers, and in his right boot just at the toe there was a big hole
						
						in the leather, carefully blackened with ink. Both the pockets of
						
						his greatcoat were weighed down with stones. Alyosha stopped two steps
						
						in front of him, looking inquiringly at him, The boy, seeing at once
						
						from Alyosha's eyes that he wouldn't beat him, became less defiant,
						
						and addressed him first.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p30">"I am alone, and there are six of them. I'll beat them all,
						
						alone!" he said suddenly, with flashing eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p31">"I think one of the stones must have hurt you badly," observed
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p32">"But I hit Smurov on the head!" cried the boy.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p33">"They told me that you know me, and that you threw a stone at me
						
						on purpose," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p34">The boy looked darkly at him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p35">"I don't know you. Do you know me?" Alyosha continued.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p36">"Let me alone!" the boy cried irritably; but he did not move, as
						
						though he were expecting something, and again there was a vindictive
						
						light in his eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p37">"Very well, I am going," said Alyosha; "only I don't know you
						
						and I don't tease you. They told me how they tease you, but I don't
						
						want to tease you. Good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p38">"Monk in silk trousers!" cried the boy, following Alyosha with the
						
						same vindictive and defiant expression, and he threw himself into an
						
						attitude of defence, feeling sure that now Alyosha would fall upon
						
						him; but Alyosha turned, looked at him, and walked away. He had not
						
						gone three steps before the biggest stone the boy had in his pocket
						
						hit him a painful blow in the back.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p39">"So you'll hit a man from behind! They tell the truth, then,
						
						when they say that you attack on the sly," said Alyosha, turning round
						
						again. This time the boy threw a stone savagely right into Alyosha's
						
						face; but Alyosha just had time to guard himself, and the stone struck
						
						him on the elbow.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p40">"Aren't you ashamed? What have I done to you?" he cried.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p41">The boy waited in silent defiance, certain that now Alyosha
						
						would attack him. Seeing that even now he would not, his rage was like
						
						a little wild beast's; he flew at Alyosha himself, and before
						
						Alyosha had time to move, the spiteful child had seized his left
						
						hand with both of his and bit his middle finger. He fixed his teeth in
						
						it and it was ten seconds before he let go. Alyosha cried out with
						
						pain and pulled his finger away with all his might. The child let go
						
						at last and retreated to his former distance. Alyosha's finger had
						
						been badly bitten to the bone, close to the nail; it began to bleed.
						
						Alyosha took out his handkerchief and bound it tightly round his
						
						injured hand. He was a full minute bandaging it. The boy stood waiting
						
						all the time. At last Alyosha raised his gentle eyes and looked at
						
						him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p42">"Very well," he said, "You see how badly you've bitten me.
						
						That's enough, isn't it? Now tell me, what have I done to you?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p43">The boy stared in amazement.
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p44">"Though I don't know you and it's the first time I've seen you,"
						
						Alyosha went on with the same serenity, "yet I must have done
						
						something to you- you wouldn't have hurt me like this for nothing.
						
						So what have I done? How have I wronged you, tell me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_4-p45">Instead of answering, the boy broke into a loud tearful wail and
						
						ran away. Alyosha walked slowly after him towards Mihailovsky
						
						Street, and for a long time he saw the child running in the distance
						
						as fast as ever, not turning his head and no doubt still keeping up
						
						his tearful wail. He made up his mind to find him out as soon as he
						
						had time, and to solve this mystery. just now he had not the time.</p>				
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - At the Hohlakovs'" prev="iii_4" next="v_3" id="iv_3">
					
					
						<p id="iv_3-p1">ALYOSHA soon reached Madame Hohlakov's house, a handsome stone
						
						house of two stories, one of the finest in our town. Though Madame
						
						Hohlakov spent most of her time in another province where she had an
						
						estate, or in Moscow, where she had a house of her own, yet she had
						
						a house in our town too, inherited from her forefathers. The estate in
						
						our district was the largest of her three estates, yet she had been
						
						very little in our province before this time. She ran out to Alyosha
						
						in the hall.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p2">"Did you get my letter about the new miracle?" She spoke rapidly
						
						and nervously.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p3">"Yes"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p4">"Did you show it to everyone? He restored the son to his mother!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p5">"He is dying to-day," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p6">"I have heard, I know, oh, how I long to talk to you, to you or
						
						someone, about all this. No, to you, to you! And how sorry I am I
						
						can't see him! The whole town is in excitement, they are all suspense.
						
						But now- do you know Katerina Ivanovna is here now?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p7">"Ah, that's lucky," cried Alyosha. "Then I shall see her here. She
						
						told me yesterday to be sure to come and see her to-day."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p8">"I know, I know all. I've heard exactly what happened yesterday-
						
						and the atrocious behaviour of that- creature. C'est tragique, and
						
						if I'd been in her place I don't know what I should have done. And
						
						your brother Dmitri Fyodorovitch, what do you think of him?- my
						
						goodness! Alexey Fyodorovitch, I am forgetting, only fancy; your
						
						brother is in there with her, not that dreadful brother who was so
						
						shocking yesterday, but the other, Ivan Fyodorovitch, he is sitting
						
						with her talking; they are having a serious conversation. If you could
						
						only imagine what's passing between them now- it's awful, I tell you
						
						it's lacerating, it's like some incredible tale of horror. They are
						
						ruining their lives for no reason anyone can see. They both
						
						recognise it and revel in it. I've been watching for you! I've been
						
						thirsting for you! It's too much for me. that's the worst of it.
						
						I'll tell you all about it presently, but now I must speak of
						
						something else, the most important thing- I had quite forgotten what's
						
						most important. Tell me, why has Lise been in hysterics? As soon as
						
						she heard you were here, she began to be hysterical!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p9">"Maman, it's you who are hysterical now, not I," Lise's voice
						
						carolled through a tiny crack of the door at the side. Her voice
						
						sounded as though she wanted to laugh, but was doing her utmost to
						
						control it. Alyosha at once noticed the crack, and no doubt Lise was
						
						peeping through it, but that he could not see.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p10">"And no wonder, Lise, no wonder... your caprices will make me
						
						hysterical too. But she is so ill, Alexey Fyodorovitch, she has been
						
						so ill all night, feverish and moaning! I could hardly wait for the
						
						morning and for Herzenstube to come. He says that he can make
						
						nothing of it, that we must wait. Herzenstube always comes and says
						
						that he can make nothing of it. As soon as you approached the house,
						
						she screamed, fell into hysterics, and insisted on being wheeled
						
						back into this room here."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p11">"Mamma, I didn't know he had come. It wasn't on his account I
						
						wanted to be wheeled into this room."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p12">"That's not true, Lise, Yulia ran to tell you that Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch was coming. She was on the lookout for you."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p13">"My darling mamma, it's not at all clever of you. But if you
						
						want to make up for it and say something very clever, dear mamma,
						
						you'd better tell our honoured visitor, Alexey Fyodorovitch, that he
						
						has shown his want of wit by venturing to us after what happened
						
						yesterday and although everyone is laughing at him."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p14">"Lise, you go too far. I declare I shall have to be severe. Who
						
						laughs at him? I am so glad he has come, I need him, I can't do
						
						without him. Oh, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I am exceedingly unhappy!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p15">"But what's the matter with you, mamma, darling?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p16">"Ah, your caprices, Lise, your fidgetiness, your illness, that
						
						awful night of fever, that awful everlasting Herzenstube, everlasting,
						
						everlasting, that's the worst of it! Everything, in fact,
						
						everything.... Even that miracle, too! Oh, how it has upset me, how it
						
						has shattered me, that miracle, dear Alexey Fyodorovitch! And that
						
						tragedy in the drawing-room, it's more than I can bear, I warn you.
						
						I can't bear it. A comedy, perhaps, not a tragedy. Tell me, will
						
						Father Zossima live till to-morrow, will he? Oh, my God! What is
						
						happening to me? Every minute I close my eyes and see that it's all
						
						nonsense, all nonsense."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p17">"I should be very grateful," Alyosha interrupted suddenly, "if you
						
						could give me a clean rag to bind up my finger with. I have hurt it,
						
						and it's very painful."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p18">Alyosha unbound his bitten finger. The handkerchief was soaked
						
						with blood. Madame Hohlakov screamed and shut her eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p19">"Good heavens, what a wound, how awful!
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p20">But as soon as Lise saw Alyosha's finger through the crack, she
						
						flung the door wide open.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p21">"Come, come here," she cried, imperiously. "No nonsense now!
						
						Good heavens, why did you stand there saying nothing about it all this
						
						time? He might have bled to death, mamma! How did you do it? Water,
						
						water! You must wash it first of all, simply hold it in cold water
						
						to stop the pain, and keep it there, keep it there.... Make haste,
						
						mamma, some water in a slop-basin. But do make haste," she finished
						
						nervously. She was quite frightened at the sight of Alyosha's wound.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p22">"Shouldn't we send for Herzenstube?" cried Madame Hohlakov.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p23">"Mamma, you'll be the death of me. Your Herzenstube will come
						
						and say that he can make nothing of it! Water, water! Mamma, for
						
						goodness' sake go yourself and hurry Yulia, she is such a slowcoach
						
						and never can come quickly! Make haste, mamma, or I shall die."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p24">"Why, it's nothing much," cried Alyosha, frightened at this alarm.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p25">Yulia ran in with water and Alyosha put his finger in it.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p26">"Some lint, mamma, for mercy's sake, bring some lint and that
						
						muddy caustic lotion for wounds, what's it called? We've got some. You
						
						know where the bottle is, mamma; it's in your bedroom in the
						
						right-hand cupboard, there's a big bottle of it there with the lint."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p27">"I'll bring everything in a minute, Lise, only don't scream and
						
						don't fuss. You see how bravely Alexey Fyodorovitch bears it. Where
						
						did you get such a dreadful wound, Alexey Fyodorovitch?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p28">Madame Hohlakov hastened away. This was all Lise was waiting for.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p29">"First of all, answer the question, where did you get hurt like
						
						this?" she asked Alyosha, quickly. "And then I'll talk to you about
						
						something quite different. Well?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p30">Instinctively feeling that the time of her mother's absence was
						
						precious for her, Alyosha hastened to tell her of his enigmatic
						
						meeting with the school boys in the fewest words possible. Lise
						
						clasped her hands at his story.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p31">"How can you, and in that dress too, associate with schoolboys?"
						
						she cried angrily, as though she had a right to control him. "You
						
						are nothing but a boy yourself if you can do that, a perfect boy!
						
						But you must find out for me about that horrid boy and tell me all
						
						about it, for there's some mystery in it. Now for the second thing,
						
						but first a question: does the pain prevent you talking about
						
						utterly unimportant things, but talking sensibly?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p32">"Of course not, and I don't feel much pain now."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p33">"That's because your finger is in the water. It must be changed
						
						directly, for it will get warm in a minute. Yulia, bring some ice from
						
						the cellar and another basin of water. Now she is gone, I can speak;
						
						will you give me the letter I sent you yesterday, dear Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch- be quick, for mamma will be back in a minute and I don't
						
						want- "
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p34">"I haven't got the letter."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p35">"That's not true, you have. I knew you would say that. You've
						
						got it in that pocket. I've been regretting that joke all night.
						
						Give me back the letter at once, give it me."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p36">"I've left it at home."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p37">"But you can't consider me as a child, a little girl, after that
						
						silly joke! I beg your pardon for that silliness, but you must bring
						
						me the letter, if you really haven't got it- bring to-day, you must,
						
						you must."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p38">"To-day I can't possibly, for I am going back to the monastery and
						
						I shan't come and see you for the next two days- three or four
						
						perhaps- for Father Zossima- "
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p39">"Four days, what nonsense! Listen. Did you laugh at me very much?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p40">"I didn't laugh at all."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p41">"Why not?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p42">"Because I believed all you said."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p43">"You are insulting me!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p44">"Not at all. As soon as I read it, I thought that all that would
						
						come to pass, for as soon as Father Zossima dies, I am to leave the
						
						monastery. Then I shall go back and finish my studies, and when you
						
						reach the legal age we will be married. I shall love you. Though I
						
						haven't had time to think about it, I believe I couldn't find a better
						
						wife than you, and Father Zossima tells me I must marry."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p45">"But I am a cripple, wheeled about in a chair," laughed Lise,
						
						flushing crimson.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p46">"I'll wheel you about myself, but I'm sure you'll get well by
						
						then."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p47">"But you are mad," said Lise, nervously, "to make all this
						
						nonsense out of a joke! Here's mamma, very a propos, perhaps. Mamma,
						
						how slow you always are, how can you be so long! And here's Yulia with
						
						the ice!
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p48">"Oh, Lise, don't scream, above all things don't scream. That
						
						scream drives me... How can I help it when you put the lint in another
						
						place? I've been hunting and hunting- I do believe you did it on
						
						purpose."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p49">"But I couldn't tell that he would come with a bad finger, or else
						
						perhaps I might have done it on purpose. My darling mamma, you begin
						
						to say really witty things."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p50">"Never mind my being witty, but I must say you show nice feeling
						
						for Alexey Fyodorovitch's sufferings! Oh, my dear Alexey Fyodorovitch,
						
						what's killing me is no one thing in particular, not Herzenstube,
						
						but everything together, that's what is too much for me."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p51">"That's enough, mamma, enough about Herzenstube," Lise laughed
						
						gaily. "Make haste with the lint and the lotion, mamma. That's
						
						simply Goulard's water, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I remember the name
						
						now, but it's a splendid lotion. Would you believe it, Mamma, on the
						
						way here he had a fight with the boys in the street, and it was a
						
						boy bit his finger, isn't he a child, a child himself? Is he fit to be
						
						married after that? For only fancy, he wants to be married, mamma.
						
						Just think of him married, wouldn't it be funny, wouldn't it be
						
						awful?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p52">And Lise kept laughing her thin hysterical giggle, looking slyly
						
						at Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p53">"But why married, Lise? What makes you talk of such a thing?
						
						It's quite out of place and perhaps the boy was rabid."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p54">"Why, mamma! As though there were rabid boys!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p55">"Why not, Lise, as though I had said something stupid! Your boy
						
						might have been bitten by a mad dog and he would become mad and bite
						
						anyone near him. How well she has bandaged it, Alexey Fyodorovitch!
						
						I couldn't have done it. Do you still feel the pain?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p56">"It's nothing much now."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p57">"You don't feel afraid of water?" asked Lise.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p58">"Come, that's enough, Lise, perhaps I really was rather too
						
						quick talking of the boy being rabid, and you pounced upon it at once.
						
						Katerina Ivanovna has only just heard that you are here, Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, she simply rushed at me, she's dying to see you, dying!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p59">"Ach, mamma, go to them yourself. He can't go just now, he is in
						
						too much pain."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p60">"Not at all, I can go quite well," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p61">"What! You are going away? Is that what you say?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p62">"Well, when I've seen them, I'll come back here and we can talk as
						
						much as you like. But I should like to see Katerina Ivanovna at
						
						once, for I am very anxious to be back at the monastery as soon as I
						
						can."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p63">"Mamma, take him away quickly. Alexey Fyodorovitch, don't
						
						trouble to come and see me afterwards, but go straight back to your
						
						monastery and a good riddance. I want to sleep, I didn't sleep all
						
						night."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p64">"Ah, Lise, you are only making fun, but how I wish you would
						
						sleep!" cried Madame Hohlakov.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p65">"I don't know what I've done.... I'll stay another three
						
						minutes, five if you like," muttered Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p66">"Even five! Do take him away quickly, mamma, he is a monster."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p67">"Lise, you are crazy. Let us go, Alexey Fyodorovitch, she is too
						
						capricious to-day. I am afraid to cross her. Oh, the trouble one has
						
						with nervous girls! Perhaps she really will be able to sleep after
						
						seeing you. How quickly you have made her sleepy, and how fortunate it
						
						is!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p68">"Ah, mamma, how sweetly you talk! I must kiss you for it, mamma."
						
							</p><p id="iv_3-p69">"And I kiss you too, Lise. Listen, Alexey Fyodorovitch," Madame
						
						Hohlakov began mysteriously and importantly, speaking in a rapid
						
						whisper. "I don't want to suggest anything, I don't want to lift the
						
						veil, you will see for yourself what's going on. It's appalling.
						
						It's the most fantastic farce. She loves your brother, Ivan, and she
						
						is doing her utmost to persuade herself she loves your brother,
						
						Dmitri. It's appalling! I'll go in with you, and if they don't turn me
						
						out, I'll stay to the end."		</p>			
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - A Laceration in the Drawing-Room" prev="iv_3" next="vi_2" id="v_3">
					
						<p id="v_3-p1">BUT in the drawing-room the conversation was already over.
						
						Katerina Ivanovna was greatly excited, though she looked resolute.
						
						At the moment Alyosha and Madame Hohlakov entered, Ivan Fyodorovitch
						
						stood up to take leave. His face was rather pale, and Alyosha looked
						
						at him anxiously. For this moment was to solve a doubt, a harassing
						
						enigma which had for some time haunted Alyosha. During the preceding
						
						month it had been several times suggested to him that his brother Ivan
						
						was in love with Katerina Ivanovna, and, what was more, that he
						
						meant "to carry her off from Dmitri. Until quite lately the idea
						
						seemed to Alyosha monstrous, though it worried him extremely. He loved
						
						both his brothers, and dreaded such rivalry between them. Meantime,
						
						Dmitri had said outright on the previous day that he was glad that
						
						Ivan was his rival, and that it was a great assistance to him, Dmitri.
						
						In what way did it assist him? To marry Grushenka? But that Alyosha
						
						considered the worst thing possible. Besides all this, Alyosha had
						
						till the evening before implicitly believed that Katerina Ivanovna had
						
						a steadfast and passionate love for Dmitri; but he had only believed
						
						it till the evening before. He had fancied, too, that she was
						
						incapable of loving a man like Ivan, and that she did love Dmitri, and
						
						loved him just as he was, in spite of all the strangeness of such a
						
						passion.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p2">But during yesterday's scene with Grushenka another idea had
						
						struck him. The word "lacerating," which Madame Hohlakov had just
						
						uttered, almost made him start, because half waking up towards
						
						daybreak that night he had cried out "Laceration, laceration,"
						
						probably applying it to his dream. He had been dreaming all night of
						
						the previous day's scene at Katerina Ivanovna's. Now Alyosha was
						
						impressed by Madame Hohlakov's blunt and persistent assertion that
						
						Katerina Ivanovna was in love with Ivan, and only deceived herself
						
						through some sort of pose, from "self-laceration," and tortured
						
						herself by her pretended love for Dmitri from some fancied duty of
						
						gratitude. "Yes," he thought, "perhaps the whole truth lies in those
						
						words." But in that case what was Ivan's position? Alyosha felt
						
						instinctively that a character like Katerina Ivanovna's must dominate,
						
						and she could only dominate someone like Dmitri, and never a man
						
						like Ivan. For Dmitri might- at last submit to her domination "to
						
						his own happiness" (which was what Alyosha would have desired), but
						
						Ivan- no, Ivan could not submit to her, and such submission would
						
						not give him happiness. Alyosha could not help believing that of Ivan.
						
						And now all these doubts and reflections flitted through his mind as
						
						he entered the drawing-room. Another idea, too, forced itself upon
						
						him: "What if she loved neither of them- neither Ivan nor Dmitri?"
						
							It must be noted that Alyosha felt as it were ashamed of his own
						
						thoughts and blamed himself when they kept recurring to him during the
						
						last month. "What do I know about love and women and how can I
						
						decide such questions?" he thought reproachfully, after such doubts
						
						and surmises. And yet it was impossible not to think about it. He felt
						
						instinctively that this rivalry was of immense importance in his
						
						brothers' lives and that a great deal depended upon it.
						
							"One reptile will devour the other," Ivan had pronounced the day
						
						before, speaking in anger of his father and Dmitri. So Ivan looked
						
						upon Dmitri as a reptile, and perhaps long done so. Was it perhaps
						
						since he had known Katerina Ivanovna? That phrase had, of course,
						
						escaped Ivan unawares yesterday, but that only made it more important.
						
						If he felt like that, what chance was there of peace? Were there
						
						not, on the contrary, new grounds for hatred and hostility in their
						
						family? And with which of them was Alyosha to sympathise? And what was
						
						he to wish for each of them? He loved them both, but what could he
						
						desire for each in the midst of these conflicting interests? He
						
						might go quite astray in this maze, and Alyosha's heart could not
						
						endure uncertainty, because his love was always of an active
						
						character. He was incapable of passive love. If he loved anyone, he
						
						set to work at once to help him. And to do so he must know what he was
						
						aiming at; he must know for certain what was best for each, and having
						
						ascertained this it was natural for him to help them both. But instead
						
						of a definite aim, he found nothing but uncertainty and perplexity
						
						on all sides. "It was lacerating," as was said just now. But what
						
						could he understand even in this "laceration"? He did not understand
						
						the first word in this perplexing maze.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p3">Seeing Alyosha, Katerina Ivanovna said quickly and joyfully to
						
						Ivan, who had already got up to go, "A minute! Stay another minute!
						
						I want to hear the opinion of this person here whom I trust
						
						absolutely. Don't go away," she added, addressing Madame Hohlakov. She
						
						made Alyosha sit down beside her, and Madame Hohlakov sat opposite, by
						
						Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p4">"You are all my friends here, all I have in the world, dear
						
						friends," she warmly, in a voice which quivered with genuine tears
						
						of suffering, and Alyosha's heart warmed to her at once. "You,
						
						Alexey Fyodorovitch, were witness yesterday of that abominable
						
						scene, and saw what I did. You did not see it, Ivan Fyodorovitch, he
						
						did. What he thought of me yesterday I don't know. I only know one
						
						thing, that if it were repeated to-day, this minute, I should
						
						express the same feelings again as yesterday- the same feelings, the
						
						same words, the same actions. You remember my actions, Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch; you checked me in one of them"... (as she said that, she
						
						flushed and her eyes shone). "I must tell you that I can't get over
						
						it. Listen, Alexey Fyodorovitch. I don't even know whether I still
						
						love him. I feel pity for him, and that is a poor sign of love. If I
						
						loved him, if I still loved him, perhaps I shouldn't be sorry for
						
						him now, but should hate him."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p5">Her voice quivered and tears glittered on her eyelashes.
						
						Alyosha shuddered inwardly. "That girl is truthful and sincere," he
						
						thought, "and she does not love Dmitri any more."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p6">"That's true, that's true," cried Madame Hohlakov.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p7">"Wait, dear. I haven't told you the chief, the final decision I
						
						came to during the night. I feel that perhaps my decision is a
						
						terrible one- for me, but I foresee that nothing will induce me to
						
						change it- nothing. It will be so all my life. My dear, kind,
						
						ever-faithful and generous adviser, the one friend I have in the
						
						world, Ivan Fyodorovitch, with his deep insight into the heart,
						
						approves and commends my decision. He knows it."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p8">"Yes, I approve of it," Ivan assented, in a subdued but firm
						
						voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p9">"But I should like Alyosha, too (Ah! Alexey Fyodorovitch,
						
						forgive my calling you simply Alyosha), I should like Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, too, to tell me before my two friends whether I am
						
						right. I feel instinctively that you, Alyosha, my dear brother (for
						
						are a dear brother to me)," she said again ecstatically, taking his
						
						cold hand in her hot one, "I foresee that your decision, your
						
						approval, will bring me peace, in spite of all my sufferings, for,
						
						after your words, I shall be calm and submit- I feel that."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p10">"I don't know what you are asking me," said Alyosha, flushing.
						
						"I only know that I love you and at this moment wish for your
						
						happiness more than my own!... But I know nothing about such affairs,"
						
						something impelled him to add hurriedly.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p11">"In such affairs, Alexey Fyodorovitch, in such affairs, the
						
						chief thing is honour and duty and something higher- I don't know what
						
						but higher perhaps even than duty. I am conscious of this irresistible
						
						feeling in my heart, and it compels me irresistibly. But it may all be
						
						put in two words. I've already decided, even if he marries that-
						
						creature," she began solemnly, "whom I never, never can forgive,
						
						even then I will not abandon him. Henceforward I will never, never
						
						abandon him!" she cried, breaking into a sort of pale, hysterical
						
						ecstasy. "Not that I would run after him continually, get in his way
						
						and worry him. Oh, no! I will go away to another town- where you like-
						
						but I will watch over him all my life- I will watch over him all my
						
						life unceasingly. When he becomes unhappy with that woman, and that is
						
						bound to happen quite soon, let him come to me and he will find a
						
						friend, a sister... Only a sister, of course, and so for ever; but
						
						he will learn at least that that sister is really his sister, who
						
						loves him and has sacrificed all her life to him. I will gain my
						
						point. I will insist on his knowing me confiding entirely in me,
						
						without reserve," she cried, in a sort of frenzy. "I will be a god
						
						to whom he can pray- and that, at least, he owes me for his
						
						treachery and for what I suffered yesterday through him. And let him
						
						see that all my life I will be true to him and the promise I gave him,
						
						in spite of his being untrue and betraying me. I will- I will become
						
						nothing but a means for his happiness, or- how shall I say?- an
						
						instrument, a machine for his happiness, and that for my whole life,
						
						my whole life, and that he may see that all his life! That's my
						
						decision. Ivan Fyodorovitch fully approves me."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p12">She was breathless. She had perhaps intended to express her idea
						
						with more dignity, art and naturalness, but her speech was too hurried
						
						and crude. It was full of youthful impulsiveness, it betrayed that she
						
						was still smarting from yesterday's insult, and that her pride
						
						craved satisfaction. She felt this herself. Her face suddenly
						
						darkened, an unpleasant look came into her eyes. Alyosha at once saw
						
						it and felt a pang of sympathy. His brother Ivan made it worse by
						
						adding:
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p13">"I've only expressed my own view," he said. "From anyone else,
						
						this would have been affected and over-strained, but from you- no. Any
						
						other woman would have been wrong, but you are right. I don't know how
						
						to explain it, but I see that you are absolutely genuine and,
						
						therefore, you are right."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p14">"But that's only for the moment. And what does this moment stand
						
						for? Nothing but yesterday's insult." Madame Hohlakov obviously had
						
						not intended to interfere, but she could not refrain from this very
						
						just comment.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p15">"Quite so, quite so," cried Ivan, with peculiar eagerness,
						
						obviously annoyed at being interrupted, "in anyone else this moment
						
						would be only due to yesterday's impression and would be only a
						
						moment. But with Katerina Ivanovna's character, that moment will
						
						last all her life. What for anyone else would be only a promise is for
						
						her an everlasting burdensome, grim perhaps, but unflagging duty.
						
						And she will be sustained by the feeling of this duty being fulfilled.
						
						Your life, Katerina Ivanovna, will henceforth be spent in painful
						
						brooding over your own feelings, your own heroism, and your own
						
						suffering; but in the end that suffering will be softened and will
						
						pass into sweet contemplation of the fulfilment of a bold and proud
						
						design. Yes, proud it certainly is, and desperate in any case, but a
						
						triumph for you. And the consciousness of it will at last be a
						
						source of complete satisfaction and will make you resigned to
						
						everything else."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p16">This was unmistakably said with some malice and obviously with
						
						intention; even perhaps with no desire to conceal that he spoke
						
						ironically and with intention.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p17">"Oh, dear, how mistaken it all is!" Madame Hohlakov cried again.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p18">"Alexey Fyodorovitch, you speak. I want dreadfully to know what
						
						you will say!" cried Katerina Ivanovna, and burst into tears.
						
						Alyosha got up from the sofa.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p19">"It's nothing, nothing!" she went on through her tears. "I'm
						
						upset, I didn't sleep last night. But by the side of two such
						
						friends as you and your brother I still feel strong- for I know you
						
						two will never desert me."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p20">"Unluckily I am obliged to return to Moscow- perhaps to-morrow-
						
						and to leave you for a long time- and, unluckily, it's unavoidable,"
						
						Ivan said suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p21">"To-morrow- to Moscow!" her face was suddenly contorted; "but-
						
						but, dear me, how fortunate!" she cried in a voice suddenly changed.
						
						In one instant there was no trace left of her tears. She underwent
						
						an instantaneous transformation, which amazed Alyosha. Instead of a
						
						poor, insulted girl, weeping in a sort of "laceration," he saw a woman
						
						completely self-possessed and even exceedingly pleased, as though
						
						something agreeable had just happened.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p22">"Oh, not fortunate that I am losing you, of course not," she
						
						collected herself suddenly, with a charming society smile. "Such a
						
						friend as you are could not suppose that. I am only too unhappy at
						
						losing you." She rushed impulsively at Ivan, and seizing both his
						
						hands, pressed them warmly. "But what is fortunate is that you will be
						
						able in Moscow to see auntie and Agafya and to tell them all the
						
						horror of my present position. You can speak with complete openness to
						
						Agafya, but spare dear auntie. You will know how to do that. You can't
						
						think how wretched I was yesterday and this morning, wondering how I
						
						could write them that dreadful letter- for one can never tell such
						
						things in a letter... Now it will be easy for me to write, for you
						
						will see them and explain everything. Oh, how glad I am! But I am only
						
						glad of that, believe me. Of course, no one can take your place....
						
						I will run at once to write the letter," she finished suddenly, and
						
						took a step as though to go out of the room.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p23">"And what about Alyosha and his opinion, which you were so
						
						desperately anxious to hear?" cried Madame Hohlakov. There was a
						
						sarcastic, angry note in her voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p24">"I had not forgotten that," cried Katerina Ivanovna, coming to a
						
						sudden standstill, "and why are you so antagonistic at such a moment?"
						
						she added, with warm and bitter reproachfulness. "What I said, I
						
						repeat. I must have his opinion. More than that, I must have his
						
						decision! As he says, so it shall be. You see how anxious I am for
						
						your words, Alexey Fyodorovitch... But what's the matter?"
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p25">"I couldn't have believed it. I can't understand it!" Alyosha
						
						cried suddenly in distress.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p26">"He is going to Moscow, and you cry out that you are glad. You
						
						said that on purpose! And you begin explaining that you are not glad
						
						of that but sorry to be- losing a friend. But that was acting, too-
						
						you were playing a part as in a theatre!"
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p27">"In a theatre? What? What do you mean?" exclaimed Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, profoundly astonished, flushing crimson, and frowning.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p28">"Though you assure him you are sorry to lose a friend in him,
						
						you persist in telling him to his face that it's fortunate he is
						
						going," said Alyosha breathlessly. He was standing at the table and
						
						did not sit down.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p29">"What are you talking about? I don't understand."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p30">"I don't understand myself.... I seemed to see in a flash... I
						
						know I am not saying it properly, but I'll say it all the same,"
						
						Alyosha went on in the same shaking and broken voice. "What I see is
						
						that perhaps you don't love Dmitri at all... and never have, from
						
						the beginning.... And Dmitri, too, has never loved you... and only
						
						esteems you.... I really don't know how I dare to say all this, but
						
						somebody must tell the truth... for nobody here will tell the truth."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p31">"What truth?" cried Katerina Ivanovna, and there was an
						
						hysterical ring in her voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p32">"I'll tell you," Alyosha went on with desperate haste, as though
						
						he were jumping from the top of a house. "Call Dmitri; I will fetch
						
						him and let him come here and take your hand and take Ivan's and
						
						join your hands. For you're torturing Ivan, simply because you love
						
						him- and torturing him, because you love Dmitri through
						
						'self-laceration'-with an unreal love- because you've persuaded
						
						yourself."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p33">Alyosha broke off and was silent.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p34">"You... you... you are a little religious idiot- that's what you
						
						are!" Katerina Ivanovna snapped. Her face was white and her lips
						
						were moving with anger.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p35">Ivan suddenly laughed and got up. His hat was in his hand.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p36">"You are mistaken, my good Alyosha," he said, with an expression
						
						Alyosha had never seen in his face before- an expression of youthful
						
						sincerity and strong, irresistibly frank feeling. "Katerina Ivanovna
						
						has never cared for me! She has known all the time that I cared for
						
						her- though I never said a word of my love to her- she knew, but she
						
						didn't care for me. I have never been her friend either, not for one
						
						moment; she is too proud to need my friendship. She kept me at her
						
						side as a means of revenge. She revenged with me and on me all the
						
						insults which she has been continually receiving from Dmitri ever
						
						since their first meeting. For even that first meeting has rankled
						
						in her heart as an insult- that's what her heart is like! She has
						
						talked to me of nothing but her love for him. I am going now; but,
						
						believe me, Katerina Ivanovna, you really love him. And the more he
						
						insults you, the more you love him- that's your 'laceration.' You love
						
						him just as he is; you love him for insulting you. If he reformed,
						
						you'd give him up at once and cease to love him. But you need him so
						
						as to contemplate continually your heroic fidelity and to reproach him
						
						for infidelity. And it all comes from your pride. Oh, there's a
						
						great deal of humiliation and self-abasement about it, but it all
						
						comes from pride.... I am too young and I've loved you too much. I
						
						know that I ought not to say this, that it would be more dignified
						
						on my part simply to leave you, and it would be less offensive for
						
						you. But I am going far away, and shall never come back.... It is
						
						for ever. I don't want to sit beside a 'laceration.'... But I don't
						
						know how to speak now. I've said everything.... Good-bye, Katerina
						
						Ivanovna; you can't be angry with me, for I am a hundred times more
						
						severely punished than you, if only by the fact that I shall never see
						
						you again. Good-bye! I don't want your hand. You have tortured me
						
						too deliberately for me to be able to forgive you at this moment. I
						
						shall forgive you later, but now I don't want your hand. Den Dank,
						
						Dame, begehr ich nicht,"* he added, with a forced smile, showing,
						
						however, that he could read Schiller, and read him till he knew him by
						
						heart- which Alyosha would never have believed. He went out of the
						
						room without saying good-bye even to his hostess, Madame Hohlakov.
						
						Alyosha clasped his hands.
						
						
						
						</p><p id="v_3-p37"> * Thank you, madam, I want nothing.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p38">"Ivan!" he cried desperately after him. "Come back, Ivan! No,
						
						nothing will induce him to come back now!" he cried again, regretfully
						
						realising it; "but it's my fault, my fault. I began it! Ivan spoke
						
						angrily, wrongly. Unjustly and angrily. He must come back here, come
						
						back," Alyosha kept exclaiming frantically.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p39">Katerina Ivanovna went suddenly into the next room.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p40">"You have done no harm. You behaved beautifully, like an angel,"
						
						Madame Hohlakov whispered rapidly and ecstatically to Alyosha. "I will
						
						do my utmost to prevent Ivan Fyodorovitch from going."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p41">Her face beamed with delight, to the great distress of Alyosha,
						
						but Katerina Ivanovna suddenly returned. She had two hundred-rouble
						
						notes in her hand.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p42">"I have a great favour to ask of you, Alexey Fyodorovitch," she
						
						began, addressing Alyosha with an apparently calm and even voice, as
						
						though nothing had happened. "A week- yes, I think it was a week
						
						ago- Dmitri Fyodorovitch was guilty of a hasty and unjust action- a
						
						very ugly action. There is a low tavern here, and in it he met that
						
						discharged officer, that captain, whom your father used to employ in
						
						some business. Dmitri Fyodorovitch somehow lost his temper with this
						
						captain, seized him by the beard and dragged him out into the street
						
						and for some distance along it, in that insulting fashion. And I am
						
						told that his son, a boy, quite a child, who is at the school here,
						
						saw it and ran beside them crying and begging for his father,
						
						appealing to everyone to defend him, while everyone laughed. You
						
						must forgive me, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I cannot think without
						
						indignation of that disgraceful action of his... one of those
						
						actions of which only Dmitri Fyodorovitch would be capable in his
						
						anger... and in his passions! I can't describe it even.... I can't
						
						find my words. I've made inquiries about his victim, and find he is
						
						quite a poor man. His name is Snegiryov. He did something wrong in the
						
						army and was discharged. I can't tell you what. And now he has sunk
						
						into terrible destitution, with his family- an unhappy family of
						
						sick children, and, I believe, an insane wife. He has been living here
						
						a long time; he used to work as a copying clerk, but now he is getting
						
						nothing. I thought if you... that is I thought... I don't know. I am
						
						so confused. You see, I wanted to ask you, my dear Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, to go to him, to find some excuse to go to them- I
						
						mean to that captain- oh, goodness, how badly I explain it!- and
						
						delicately, carefully, as only you know how to" (Alyosha blushed),
						
						"manage to give him this assistance, these two hundred roubles. He
						
						will be sure to take it.... I mean, persuade him to take it.... Or,
						
						rather, what do I mean? You see it's not by way of compensation to
						
						prevent him from taking proceedings (for I believe he meant to), but
						
						simply a token of sympathy, of a desire to assist him from me,
						
						Dmitri Fyodorovitch's betrothed, not from himself.... But you know....
						
						I would go myself, but you'll know how to do it ever so much better.
						
						He lives in Lake Street in the house of a woman called Kalmikov....
						
						For God's sake, Alexey Fyodorovitch, do it for me, and now... now I am
						
						rather... tired... Good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p43">She turned and disappeared behind the portiere so quickly that
						
						Alyosha had not time to utter a word, though he wanted to speak. He
						
						longed to beg her pardon, to blame himself, to say something, for
						
						his heart was full and he could not bear to go out of the room without
						
						it. But Madame Hohlakov took him by the hand and drew him along with
						
						her. In the hall she stopped him again as before.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p44">"She is proud, she is struggling with herself; but kind, charming,
						
						generous, "she exclaimed, in a half-whisper. "Oh, how I love her,
						
						especially sometimes, and how glad I am again of everything! Dear
						
						Alexey Fyodorovitch, you didn't know, but I must tell you, that we
						
						all, all- both her aunts, I and all of us, Lise, even- have been
						
						hoping and praying for nothing for the last month but that she may
						
						give up your favourite Dmitri, who takes no notice of her and does not
						
						care for her, and may marry Ivan Fyodorovitch- such an excellent and
						
						cultivated young man, who loves her more than anything in the world.
						
						We are in a regular plot to bring it about, and I am even staying on
						
						here perhaps on that account."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p45">"But she has been crying- she has been wounded again," cried
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p46">"Never trust a woman's tears, Alexey Fyodorovitch. I am never
						
						for the women in such cases. I am always on the side of the men."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p47">"Mamma, you are spoiling him," Lise's little voice cried from
						
						behind the door.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p48">"No, it was all my fault. I am horribly to blame," Alyosha
						
						repeated unconsoled, hiding his face in his hands in an agony of
						
						remorse for his indiscretion.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p49">"Quite the contrary; you behaved like an angel, like an angel. I
						
						am ready to say so a thousand times over."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p50">"Mamma, how has he behaved like an angel?" Lise's voice was
						
						heard again.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p51">"I somehow fancied all at once," Alyosha went on as though he
						
						had not heard Lise, "that she loved Ivan, and so I said that stupid
						
						thing.... What will happen now?"
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p52">"To whom, to whom?" cried Lise. "Mamma, you really want to be
						
						the death of me. I ask you and you don't answer."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p53">At the moment the maid ran in.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p54">"Katerina Ivanovna is ill.... She is crying, struggling...
						
						hysterics."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p55">"What is the matter?" cried Lise, in a tone of real anxiety.
						
						"Mamma, I shall be having hysterics, and not she!"
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p56">"Lise, for mercy's sake, don't scream, don't persecute me. At your
						
						age one can't know everything that grown-up people know. I'll come and
						
						tell you everything you ought to know. Oh, mercy on us! I am coming, I
						
						am coming.... Hysterics is a good sign, Alexey Fyodorovitch; it's an
						
						excellent thing that she is hysterical. That's just as it ought to be.
						
						In such cases I am always against the woman, against all these
						
						feminine tears and hysterics. Run and say, Yulia, that I'll fly to
						
						her. As for Ivan Fyodorovitch's going away like that, it's her own
						
						fault. But he won't go away. Lise, for mercy's sake, don't scream! Oh,
						
						yes; you are not screaming. It's I am screaming. Forgive your mamma;
						
						but I am delighted, delighted, delighted! Did you notice, Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, how young, how young Ivan Fyodorovitch was just now when
						
						he went out, when he said all that and went out? I thought he was so
						
						learned, such a savant, and all of a sudden he behaved so warmly,
						
						openly, and youthfully, with such youthful inexperience, and it was
						
						all so fine, like you.... And the way he repeated that German verse,
						
						it was just like you! But I must fly, I must fly! Alexey Fyodorovitch,
						
						make haste to carry out her commission, and then make haste back.
						
						Lise, do you want anything now? For mercy's sake, don't keep Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch a minute. He will come back to you at once."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p57">Madame Hohlakov at last ran off. Before leaving, Alyosha would
						
						have opened the door to see Lise.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p58">"On no account," cried Lise. "On no account now. Speak through the
						
						door. How have you come to be an angel? That's the only thing I want
						
						to know."
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p59">"For an awful piece of stupidity, Lise! Goodbye!"
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p60">"Don't dare to go away like that!" Lise was beginning.
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p61">"Lise, I have a real sorrow! I'll be back directly, but I have a
						
						great, great sorrow!
						
							</p><p id="v_3-p62">And he ran out of the room.			</p>		
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - A Laceration in the Cottage" prev="v_3" next="vii_2" id="vi_2">
						<p id="vi_2-p1">HE certainly was really grieved in a way he had seldom been
						
						before. He had rushed in like a fool, and meddled in what? In a
						
						love-affair. "But what do I know about it? What can I tell about
						
						such things?" he repeated to himself for the hundredth time,
						
						flushing crimson. "Oh, being ashamed would be nothing; shame is only
						
						the punishment I deserve. The trouble is I shall certainly have caused
						
						more unhappiness.... And Father Zossima sent me to reconcile and bring
						
						them together. Is this the way to bring them together?" Then he
						
						suddenly remembered how he had tried to join their hands, and he
						
						felt fearfully ashamed again. "Though I acted quite sincerely, I
						
						must be more sensible in the future," he concluded suddenly, and did
						
						not even smile at his conclusion.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p2">Katerina Ivanovna's commission took him to Lake Street, and his
						
						brother Dmitri lived close by, in a turning out of Lake Street.
						
						Alyosha decided to go to him in any case before going to the
						
						captain, though he had a presentiment that he would not find his
						
						brother. He suspected that he would intentionally keep out of his
						
						way now, but he must find him anyhow. Time was passing: the thought of
						
						his dying elder had not left Alyosha for one minute from the time he
						
						set off from the monastery.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p3">There was one point which interested him particularly about
						
						Katerina Ivanovna's commission; when she had mentioned the captain's
						
						son, the little schoolboy who had run beside his father crying, the
						
						idea had at once struck Alyosha that this must be the schoolboy who
						
						had bitten his finger when he, Alyosha, asked him what he had done
						
						to hurt him. Now Alyosha felt practically certain of this, though he
						
						could not have said why. Thinking of another subject was a relief, and
						
						he resolved to think no more about the "mischief" he had done, and not
						
						to torture himself with remorse, but to do what he had to do, let come
						
						what would. At that thought he was completely comforted. Turning to
						
						the street where Dmitri lodged, he felt hungry, and taking out of
						
						his pocket the roll he had brought from his father's, he ate it. It
						
						made him feel stronger.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p4">Dmitri was not at home. The people of the house, an old
						
						cabinet-maker, his son, and his old wife, looked with positive
						
						suspicion at Alyosha. "He hasn't slept here for the last three nights.
						
						Maybe he has gone away," the old man said in answer to Alyosha's
						
						persistent inquiries. Alyosha saw that he was answering in
						
						accordance with instructions. When he asked whether he were not at
						
						Grushenka's or in hiding at Foma's (Alyosha spoke so freely on
						
						purpose), all three looked at him in alarm. "They are fond of him,
						
						they are doing their best for him," thought Alyosha. "That's good."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p5">At last he found the house in Lake Street. It was a decrepit
						
						little house, sunk on one side, with three windows looking into the
						
						street, and with a muddy yard, in the middle of which stood a solitary
						
						cow. He crossed the yard and found the door opening into the
						
						passage. On the left of the passage lived the old woman of the house
						
						with her old daughter. Both seemed to be deaf. In answer to his
						
						repeated inquiry for the captain, one of them at last understood
						
						that he was asking for their lodgers, and pointed to a door across the
						
						passage. The captain's lodging turned out to be a simple cottage room.
						
						Alyosha had his hand on the iron latch to open the door, when he was
						
						struck by the strange hush within. Yet he knew from Katerina
						
						Ivanovna's words that the man had a family. "Either they are all
						
						asleep or perhaps they have heard me coming and are waiting for me
						
						to open the door. I'd better knock first," and he knocked. An answer
						
						came, but not at once, after an interval of perhaps ten seconds.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p6">"Who's there?" shouted someone in a loud and very angry voice.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p7">Then Alyosha opened the door and crossed the threshold. He found
						
						himself in a regular peasant's room. Though it was large, it was
						
						cumbered up with domestic belongings of all sorts, and there were
						
						several people in it. On the left was a large Russian stove. From
						
						the stove to the window on the left was a string running across the
						
						room, and on it there were rags hanging. There was a bedstead
						
						against the wall on each side, right and left, covered with knitted
						
						quilts. On the one on the left was a pyramid of four print-covered
						
						pillows, each smaller than the one beneath. On the other there was
						
						only one very small pillow. The opposite corner was screened off by
						
						a curtain or a sheet hung on a string. Behind this curtain could be
						
						seen a bed made up on a bench and a chair. The rough square table of
						
						plain wood had been moved into the middle window. The three windows,
						
						which consisted each of four tiny greenish mildewy panes, gave
						
						little light, and were close shut, so that the room was not very light
						
						and rather stuffy. On the table was a frying pan with the remains of
						
						some fried eggs, a half-eaten piece of bread, and a small bottle
						
						with a few drops of vodka.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p8">A woman of genteel appearance, wearing a cotton gown, was
						
						sitting on a chair by the bed on the left. Her face was thin and
						
						yellow, and her sunken cheeks betrayed at the first glance that she
						
						was ill. But what struck Alyosha most was the expression in the poor
						
						woman's eyes- a look of surprised inquiry and yet of haughty pride.
						
						And while he was talking to her husband, her big brown eyes moved from
						
						one speaker to the other with the same haughty and questioning
						
						expression. Beside her at the window stood a young girl, rather plain,
						
						with scanty reddish hair, poorly but very neatly dressed. She looked
						
						disdainfully at Alyosha as he came in. Beside the other bed was
						
						sitting another female figure. She was a very sad sight, a young
						
						girl of about twenty, but hunchback and crippled "with withered legs,"
						
						as Alyosha was told afterwards. Her crutches stood in the corner close
						
						by. The strikingly beautiful and gentle eyes of this poor girl
						
						looked with mild serenity at Alyosha. A man of forty-five was
						
						sitting at the table, finishing the fried eggs. He was spare, small,
						
						and weakly built. He had reddish hair and a scanty light-coloured
						
						beard, very much like a wisp of tow (this comparison and the phrase "a
						
						wisp of tow" flashed at once into Alyosha's mind for some reason, he
						
						remembered it afterwards). It was obviously this gentleman who had
						
						shouted to him, as there was no other man in the room. But when
						
						Alyosha went in, he leapt up from the bench on which he was sitting,
						
						and, hastily wiping his mouth with a ragged napkin, darted up to
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p9">"It's a monk come to beg for the monastery. A nice place to come
						
						to!" the girl standing in the left corner said aloud. The man spun
						
						round instantly towards her and answered her in an excited and
						
						breaking voice:
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p10">"No, Varvara, you are wrong. Allow me to ask," he turned again
						
						to Alyosha, "what has brought you to our retreat?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p11">Alyosha looked attentively at him. It was the first time he had
						
						seen him. There was something angular, flurried and irritable about
						
						him. Though he had obviously just been drinking, he was not drunk.
						
						There was extraordinary impudence in his expression, and yet,
						
						strange to say, at the same time there was fear. He looked like a
						
						man who had long been kept in subjection and had submitted to it,
						
						and now had suddenly turned and was trying to assert himself. Or,
						
						better still, like a man who wants dreadfully to hit you but is
						
						horribly afraid you will hit him. In his words and in the intonation
						
						of his shrill voice there was a sort of crazy humour, at times
						
						spiteful and at times cringing, and continually shifting from one tone
						
						to another. The question about "our retreat" he had asked, as it were,
						
						quivering all over, rolling his eyes, and skipping up so close to
						
						Alyosha that he instinctively drew back a step. He was dressed in a
						
						very shabby dark cotton coat, patched and spotted. He wore checked
						
						trousers of an extremely light colour, long out of fashion, and of
						
						very thin material. They were so crumpled and so short that he
						
						looked as though he had grown out of them like a boy.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p12">"I am Alexey Karamazov," Alyosha began in reply.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p13">"I quite understand that, sir," the gentleman snapped out at
						
						once to assure him that he knew who he was already. "I am Captain
						
						Snegiryov, sir, but I am still desirous to know precisely what has led
						
						you- "
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p14">"Oh, I've come for nothing special. I wanted to have a word with
						
						you- if only you allow me."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p15">"In that case, here is a chair, sir; kindly be seated. That's what
						
						they used to say in the old comedies, 'kindly be seated,'" and with
						
						a rapid gesture he seized an empty chair (it was a rough wooden chair,
						
						not upholstered) and set it for him almost in the middle of the
						
						room; then, taking another similar chair for himself, he sat down
						
						facing Alyosha, so close to him that their knees almost touched.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p16">"Nikolay Ilyitch Snegiryov, sir, formerly a captain in the Russian
						
						infantry, put to shame for his vices, but still a captain. Though I
						
						might not be one now for the way I talk; for the last half of my
						
						life I've learnt to say 'sir.' It's a word you use when you've come
						
						down in the world."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p17">"That's very true," smiled Alyosha. "But is it used
						
						involuntarily or on purpose?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p18">"As God's above, it's involuntary, and I usen't to use it! I
						
						didn't use the word 'sir' all my life, but as soon as I sank into
						
						low water I began to say 'sir.' It's the work of a higher power. I see
						
						you are interested in contemporary questions, but how can I have
						
						excited your curiosity, living as I do in surroundings impossible
						
						for the exercise of hospitality?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p19">"I've come- about that business."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p20">"About what business?" the captain interrupted impatiently.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p21">"About your meeting with my brother Dmitri Fyodorovitch,"
						
						Alyosha blurted out awkwardly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p22">"What meeting, sir? You don't mean that meeting? About my 'wisp of
						
						tow,' then?" He moved closer so that his knees positively knocked
						
						against Alyosha. His lips were strangely compressed like a thread.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p23">"What wisp of tow?" muttered Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p24">"He is come to complain of me, father!" cried a voice familiar
						
						to Alyosha- the voice of the schoolboy- from behind the curtain. "I
						
						bit his finger just now." The curtain was pulled, and Alyosha saw
						
						his assailant lying on a little bed made up on the bench and the chair
						
						in the corner under the ikons. The boy lay covered by his coat and
						
						an old wadded quilt. He was evidently unwell, and, judging by his
						
						glittering eyes, he was in a fever. He looked at Alyosha without fear,
						
						as though he felt he was at home and could not be touched.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p25">"What! Did he bite your finger?" The captain jumped up from his
						
						chair. "Was it your finger he bit?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p26">"Yes. He was throwing stones with other schoolboys. There were six
						
						of them against  him alone. I went up to him, and he threw a stone
						
						at me and then another at my head. I asked him what I had done to him.
						
						And then he rushed at me and bit my finger badly, I don't know why."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p27">"I'll thrash him, sir, at once- this minute!" The captain jumped
						
						up from his seat.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p28">"But I am not complaining at all, I am simply telling you.... I
						
						don't want him to be thrashed. Besides, he seems to be ill."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p29">"And do you suppose I'd thrash him? That I'd take my Ilusha and
						
						thrash him before you for your satisfaction? Would you like it done at
						
						once, sir?" said the captain, suddenly turning to Alyosha, as though
						
						he were going to attack him. "I am sorry about your finger, sir; but
						
						instead of thrashing Ilusha, would you like me to chop off my four
						
						fingers with this knife here before your eyes to satisfy your just
						
						wrath? I should think four fingers would be enough to satisfy your
						
						thirst for vengeance. You won't ask for the fifth one too?" He stopped
						
						short with a catch in his throat. Every feature in his face was
						
						twitching and working; he looked extremely defiant. He was in a sort
						
						of frenzy.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p30">"I think I understand it all now," said Alyosha gently and
						
						sorrowfully, still keeping his seat. "So your boy is a good boy, he
						
						loves his father, and he attacked me as the brother of your
						
						assailant.... Now I understand it," he repeated thoughtfully. "But
						
						my brother Dmitri Fyodorovitch regrets his action, I know that, and if
						
						only it is possible for him to come to you, or better still, to meet
						
						you in that same place, he will ask your forgiveness before
						
						everyone- if you wish it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p31">"After pulling out my beard, you mean, he will ask my forgiveness?
						
						And he thinks that will be a satisfactory finish, doesn't he?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p32">"Oh, no! On the contrary, he will do anything you like and in
						
						any way you like."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p33">"So if I were to ask his highness to go down on his knees before
						
						me in that very tavern- 'The Metropolis' it's called- or in the
						
						marketplace, he would do it?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p34">"Yes, he would even go down on his knees."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p35">"You've pierced me to the heart, sir. Touched me to tears and
						
						pierced me to the heart! I am only too sensible of your brother's
						
						generosity. Allow me to introduce my family, my two daughters and my
						
						son- my litter. If I die, who will care for them, and while I live who
						
						but they will care for a wretch like me? That's a great thing the Lord
						
						has ordained for every man of my sort, sir. For there must be
						
						someone able to love even a man like me."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p36">"Ah, that's perfectly true!" exclaimed Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p37">"Oh, do leave off playing the fool! Some idiot comes in, and you
						
						put us to shame!" cried the girl by the window, suddenly turning to
						
						her father with a disdainful and contemptuous air.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p38">"Wait a little, Varvara!" cried her father, speaking
						
						peremptorily but looking at them quite approvingly. "That's her
						
						character," he said, addressing Alyosha again.</p><p id="vi_2-p39" />
						
						
						
											<p class="center" id="vi_2-p40">"And in all nature there was naught</p>
						
											<p class="center" id="vi_2-p41">That could find favour in his eyes-</p><p id="vi_2-p42" /><p id="vi_2-p43">
						
						
						
						or rather in the feminine- that could find favour in her eyes- . But
						
						now let me present you to my wife, Arina Petrovna. She is crippled,
						
						she is forty-three; she can move, but very little. She is of humble
						
						origin. Arina Petrovna, compose your countenance. This is Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch Karamazov. Get up, Alexey Fyodorovitch." He took him by
						
						the hand and with unexpected force pulled him up. "You must stand up
						
						to be introduced to a lady. It's not the Karamazov, mamma, who...
						
						h'm... etcetera, but his brother, radiant with modest virtues. Come,
						
						Arina Petrovna, come, mamma, first your hand to be kissed."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p44">And he kissed his wife's hand respectfully and even tenderly.
						
						The girl at the window turned her back indignantly on the scene; an
						
						expression of extraordinary cordiality came over the haughtily
						
						inquiring face of the woman.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p45">"Good morning! Sit down, Mr. Tchernomazov," she said.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p46">"Karamazov, mamma, Karamazov. We are of humble origin," he
						
						whispered again.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p47">"Well, Karamazov, or whatever it is, but I always think of
						
						Tchermomazov.... Sit down. Why has he pulled you up? He calls me
						
						crippled, but I am not, only my legs are swollen like barrels, and I
						
						am shrivelled up myself. Once I used to be so fat, but now it's as
						
						though I had swallowed a needle."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p48">"We are of humble origin," the captain muttered again.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p49">"Oh, father, father!" the hunchback girl, who had till then been
						
						silent on her chair, said suddenly, and she hid her eyes in her
						
						handkerchief.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p50">"Buffoon!" blurted out the girl at the window.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p51">"Have you heard our news?" said the mother, pointing at her
						
						daughters. "It's like clouds coming over; the clouds pass and we
						
						have music again. When we were with the army, we used to have many
						
						such guests. I don't mean to make any comparisons; everyone to their
						
						taste. The deacon's wife used to come then and say, 'Alexandr
						
						Alexandrovitch is a man of the noblest heart, but Nastasya
						
						Petrovna,' she would say, 'is of the brood of hell.' 'Well,' I said,
						
						'that's a matter of taste; but you are a little spitfire.' 'And you
						
						want keeping in your place;' says she. 'You black sword,' said I, 'who
						
						asked you to teach me?' 'But my breath,' says she, 'is clean, and
						
						yours is unclean.' 'You ask all the officers whether my breath is
						
						unclean.' And ever since then I had it in my mind. Not long ago I
						
						was sitting here as I am now, when I saw that very general come in who
						
						came here for Easter, and I asked him: 'Your Excellency,' said I, 'can
						
						a lady's breath be unpleasant?' 'Yes,' he answered; 'you ought to open
						
						a window-pane or open the door, for the air is not fresh here.' And
						
						they all go on like that! And what is my breath to them? The dead
						
						smell worse still!. 'I won't spoil the air,' said I, 'I'll order
						
						some slippers and go away.' My darlings, don't blame your own
						
						mother! Nikolay Ilyitch, how is it I can't please you? There's only
						
						Ilusha who comes home from school and loves me. Yesterday he brought
						
						me an apple. Forgive your own mother- forgive a poor lonely
						
						creature! Why has my breath become unpleasant to you?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p52">And the poor mad woman broke into sobs, and tears streamed down
						
						her cheeks. The captain rushed up to her.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p53">"Mamma, mamma, my dear, give over! You are not lonely. Everyone
						
						loves you, everyone adores you." He began kissing both her hands again
						
						and tenderly stroking her face; taking the dinner-napkin, he began
						
						wiping away her tears. Alyosha fancied that he too had tears in his
						
						eyes. "There, you see, you hear?" he turned with a sort of fury to
						
						Alyosha, pointing to the poor imbecile.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p54">"I see and hear," muttered Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p55">"Father, father, how can you- with him! Let him alone!" cried
						
						the boy, sitting up in his bed and gazing at his father with glowing
						
						eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p56">"Do give over fooling, showing off your silly antics which never
						
						lead to anything! shouted Varvara, stamping her foot with passion.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p57">"Your anger is quite just this time, Varvara, and I'll make
						
						haste to satisfy you. Come, put on your cap, Alexey Fyodorovitch,
						
						and I'll put on mine. We will go out. I have a word to say to you in
						
						earnest, but not within these walls. This girl sitting here is my
						
						daughter Nina; I forgot to introduce her to you. She is a heavenly
						
						angel incarnate... who has flown down to us mortals,... if you can
						
						understand."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p58">"There he is shaking all over, as though he is in convulsions!"
						
						Varvara went on indignantly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p59">"And she there stamping her foot at me and calling me a fool
						
						just now, she is a heavenly angel incarnate too, and she has good
						
						reason to call me so. Come along, Alexey Fyodorovitch, we must make an
						
						end."
						
							</p><p id="vi_2-p60">And, snatching Alyosha's hand, he drew him out of the room into
						
						the street.</p>
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - And in the Open Air" prev="vi_2" next="ii_6" id="vii_2">
					
					
							<p id="vii_2-p1">"THE air is fresh, but in my apartment it is not so in any sense
						
						of the word. Let us walk slowly, sir. I should be glad of your kind
						
						interest."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p2">"I too have something important to say to you," observed
						
						Alyosha, "only I don't know how to begin."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p3">"To be sure you must have business with me. You would never have
						
						looked in upon me without some object. Unless you come simply to
						
						complain of the boy, and that's hardly likely. And, by the way,
						
						about the boy: I could not explain to you in there, but here I will
						
						describe that scene to you. My tow was thicker a week ago- I mean my
						
						beard. That's the nickname they give to my beard, the schoolboys
						
						most of all. Well, your brother Dmitri Fyodorovitch was pulling me
						
						by my beard, I'd done nothing, he was in a towering rage and
						
						happened to come upon me. He dragged me out of the tavern into the
						
						market place; at that moment the boys were coming out of school, and
						
						with them Ilusha. As soon as he saw me in such a state he rushed up to
						
						me. 'Father,' he cried, 'father!' He caught hold of me, hugged me,
						
						tried to pull me away, crying to my assailant, 'Let go, let go, it's
						
						my father, forgive him!'- yes, he actually cried 'forgive him.' He
						
						clutched at that hand, that very hand, in his little hands and
						
						kissed it.... I remember his little face at that moment, I haven't
						
						forgotten it and I never shall!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p4">"I swear," cried Alyosha, "that my brother will express his most
						
						deep and sincere regret, even if he has to go down on his knees in
						
						that same market-place.... I'll make him or he is no brother of mine!
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p5">"Aha, then it's only a suggestion! And it does not come from him
						
						but simply from the generosity of your own warm heart. You should have
						
						said so. No, in that case allow me to tell you of your brother's
						
						highly chivalrous soldierly generosity, for he did give expression
						
						to it at the time. He left off dragging me by my beard and released
						
						me: 'You are an officer,' he said, 'and I am an officer, if you can
						
						find a decent man to be your second send me your challenge. I will
						
						give satisfaction, though you are a scoundrel.' That's what he said. A
						
						chivalrous spirit indeed! I retired with Ilusha, and that scene is a
						
						family record imprinted forever on Ilusha's soul. No, it's not for
						
						us to claim the privileges of noblemen. Judge for yourself. You've
						
						just been in our mansion, what did you see there? Three ladies, one
						
						a cripple and weak-minded, another a cripple and hunchback and the
						
						third not crippled but far too clever. She is a student, dying to
						
						get back to Petersburg, to work for the emancipation of the Russian
						
						woman on the banks of the Neva. I won't speak of Ilusha, he is only
						
						nine. I am alone in the world, and if I die, what will become of all
						
						of them? I simply ask you that. And if I challenge him and he kills me
						
						on the spot, what then? What will become of them? And worse still,
						
						if he doesn't kill me but only cripples me: I couldn't work, but I
						
						should still be a mouth to feed. Who would feed it and who would
						
						feed them all? Must I take Ilusha from school and send him to beg in
						
						the streets? That's what it means for me to challenge him to a duel.
						
						It's silly talk and nothing else."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p6">"He will beg your forgiveness, he will bow down at your feet in
						
						the middle of the marketplace," cried Alyosha again, with glowing
						
						eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p7">"I did think of prosecuting him," the captain went on, "but look
						
						in our code, could I get much compensation for a personal injury?
						
						And then Agrafena Alexandrovna* sent for me and shouted at me:
						
						'Don't dare to dream of it! If you proceed against him, I'll publish
						
						it to all the world that he beat you for your dishonesty, and then you
						
						will be prosecuted.' I call God to witness whose was the dishonesty
						
						and by whose commands I acted, wasn't it by her own and Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's? And what's more,' she went on, 'I'll dismiss you for
						
						good and you'll never earn another penny from me. I'll speak to my
						
						merchant too' (that's what she calls her old man) 'and he will dismiss
						
						you!' And if he dismisses me, what can I earn then from anyone?
						
						Those two are all I have to look to, for your Fyodor Pavlovitch has
						
						not only given over employing me, for another reason, but he means
						
						to make use of papers I've signed to go to law against me. And so I
						
						kept quiet, and you have seen our retreat. But now let me ask you: did
						
						Ilusha hurt your finger much? I didn't like to go into it in our
						
						mansion before him."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p8">* Grushenka.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p9">"Yes, very much, and he was in a great fury. He was avenging you
						
						on me as a Karamazov, I see that now. But if only you had seen how
						
						he was throwing stones at his schoolfellows! It's very dangerous. They
						
						might kill him. They are children and stupid. A stone may be thrown
						
						and break somebody's head."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p10">"That's just what has happened. He has been bruised by a stone
						
						to-day. Not on the head but on the chest, just above the heart. He
						
						came home crying and groaning and now he is ill."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p11">"And you know he attacks them first. He is bitter against them
						
						on your account. They say he stabbed a boy called Krassotkin with a
						
						penknife not long ago."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p12">"I've heard about that too, it's dangerous. Krassotkin is an
						
						official here, we may hear more about it."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p13">"I would advise you," Alyosha went on warmly, "not to send him
						
						to school at all for a time till he is calmer. and his anger is
						
						passed."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p14">"Anger!" the captain repeated, "that's just what it is. He is a
						
						little creature, but it's a mighty anger. You don't know all, sir. Let
						
						me tell you more. Since that incident all the boys have been teasing
						
						him about the 'wisp of tow.' Schoolboys are a merciless race,
						
						individually they are angels, but together, especially in schools,
						
						they are often merciless. Their teasing has stiffed up a gallant
						
						spirit in Ilusha. An ordinary boy, a weak son, would have submitted,
						
						have felt ashamed of his father, sir, but he stood up for his father
						
						against them all. For his father and for truth and justice. For what
						
						he suffered when he kissed your brother's hand and cried to him
						
						'Forgive father, forgive him,'- that only God knows- and I, his
						
						father. For our children- not your children, but ours- the children of
						
						the poor gentlemen looked down upon by everyone- know what justice
						
						means, sir, even at nine years old. How should the rich know? They
						
						don't explore such depths once in their lives. But at that moment in
						
						the square when he kissed his hand, at that moment my Ilusha had
						
						grasped all that justice means. That truth entered into him and
						
						crushed him for ever, sir," the captain said hotly again with a sort
						
						of frenzy, and he struck his right fist against his left palm as
						
						though he wanted to show how "the truth" crushed Ilusha. "That very
						
						day, sir, he fell ill with fever and was delirious all night. All that
						
						day he hardly said a word to me, but I noticed he kept watching me
						
						from the corner, though he turned to the window and pretended to be
						
						learning his lessons. But I could see his mind was not on his lessons.
						
						Next day I got drunk to forget my troubles, sinful man as I am, and
						
						I don't remember much. Mamma began crying, too- I am very fond of
						
						mamma- well, I spent my last penny drowning my troubles. Don't despise
						
						me for that, sir, in Russia men who drink are the best. The best men
						
						amongst us are the greatest drunkards. I lay down and I don't remember
						
						about Ilusha, though all that day the boys had been jeering at him
						
						at school. 'Wisp of tow,' they shouted, 'your father was pulled out of
						
						the tavern by his wisp of tow, you ran by and begged forgiveness.'
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p15">"On the third day when he came back from school, I saw he looked
						
						pale and wretched. 'What is it?' I asked. He wouldn't answer. Well,
						
						there's no talking in our mansion without mamma and the girls taking
						
						part in it. What's more, the girls had heard about it the very first
						
						day. Varvara had begun snarling. 'You fools and buffoons, can you ever
						
						do anything rational?' 'Quite so,' I said,'can we ever do anything
						
						rational?' For the time I turned it off like that. So in the evening I
						
						took the boy out for a walk, for you must know we go for a walk
						
						every evening, always the same way, along which we are going now- from
						
						our gate to that great stone which lies alone in the road under the
						
						hurdle, which marks the beginning of the town pasture. A beautiful and
						
						lonely spot, sir. Ilusha and I walked along hand in hand as usual.
						
						He has a little hand, his fingers are thin and cold- he suffers with
						
						his chest, you know. 'Father,' said he, 'father!' 'Well?' said I. I
						
						saw his eyes flashing. 'Father, how he treated you then!' 'It can't be
						
						helped, Ilusha,' I said. 'Don't forgive him, father, don't forgive
						
						him! At school they say that he has paid you ten roubles for it.'
						
						'No Ilusha,' said I, 'I would not take money from him for anything.'
						
						he began trembling all over, took my hand in both his and kissed it
						
						again. 'Father,' he said, 'father, challenge him to a duel, at
						
						school they say you are a coward and won't challenge him, and that
						
						you'll accept ten roubles from him.' 'I can't challenge him to a duel,
						
						Ilusha,' I answered. And I told briefly what I've just told you. He
						
						listened. 'Father,' he said, anyway don't forgive it. When I grow up
						
						I'll call him out myself and kill him.' His eyes shone and glowed. And
						
						of course I am his father, and I had to put in a word: 'It's a sin
						
						to kill,' I said, 'even in a duel.' 'Father,' he said, 'when I grow
						
						up, I'll knock him down, knock the sword out of his hand, I'll fall on
						
						him, wave my sword over him and say: "I could kill you, but I
						
						forgive you, so there!"' You see what the workings of his little
						
						mind have been during these two days; he must have been planning
						
						that vengeance all day, and raving about it at night.
						
							"But he began to come home from school badly beaten, I found out
						
						about it the day before yesterday, and you are right, I won't send him
						
						to that school any more. I heard that he was standing up against all
						
						the class alone and defying them all, that his heart was full of
						
						resentment, of bitterness- I was alarmed about him. We went for
						
						another walk. 'Father,' he asked, 'are the rich people stronger than
						
						anyone else on earth?' 'Yes, Ilusha,' I said, 'there are no people
						
						on earth stronger than the rich.' 'Father,' he said, 'I will get rich,
						
						I will become an officer and conquer everybody. The Tsar will reward
						
						me, I will come back here and then no one will dare- ' Then he was
						
						silent and his lips still kept trembling. 'Father,' he said, 'what a
						
						horrid town this is.' 'Yes, Ilusha,' I said, 'it isn't a very nice
						
						town.' 'Father, let us move into another town, a nice one,' he said,
						
						'where people don't know about us.' 'We will move, we will, Ilusha,'
						
						said I, 'only I must save up for it.' I was glad to be able to turn
						
						his mind from painful thoughts, and we began to dream of how we
						
						would move to another town, how we would buy a horse and cart. 'We
						
						will put mamma and your sisters inside, we will cover them up and
						
						we'll walk, you shall have a lift now and then, and I'll walk
						
						beside, for we must take care of our horse, we can't all ride.
						
						That's how we'll go.' He was enchanted at that, most of all at the
						
						thought of having a horse and driving him. For of course a Russian boy
						
						is born among horses. We chattered a long while. Thank God, I thought,
						
						I have diverted his mind and comforted him.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p16">"That was the day before yesterday, in the evening, but last night
						
						everything was changed. He had gone to school in the morning, he
						
						came back depressed, terribly depressed. In the evening I took him
						
						by the hand and we went for a walk; he would not talk. There was a
						
						wind blowing and no sun, and a feeling of autumn; twilight was
						
						coming on. We walked along, both of us depressed. 'Well, my boy,' said
						
						I, 'how about our setting off on our travels?' I thought I might bring
						
						him back to our talk of the day before. He didn't answer, but I felt
						
						his fingers trembling in my hand. Ah, I thought, it's a bad job;
						
						there's something fresh. We had reached the stone where we are now.
						
						I sat down on the stone. And in the air there were lots of kites
						
						flapping and whirling. There were as many as thirty in sight. Of
						
						course, it's just the season for the kites. 'Look, Ilusha,' said I,
						
						'it's time we got out our last year's kite again. I'll mend it;
						
						where have you put it away?' My boy made no answer. He looked away and
						
						turned sideways to me. And then a gust of wind blew up the sand. He
						
						suddenly fell on me, threw both his little arms round my neck and held
						
						me tight. You know, when children are silent and proud, and try to
						
						keep back their tears when they are in great trouble and suddenly
						
						break down, their tears fall in streams. With those warm streams of
						
						tears, he suddenly wetted my face. He sobbed and shook as though he
						
						were in convulsions, and squeezed up against me as I sat on the stone.
						
						'Father,' he kept crying, 'dear father, how he insulted you!' And I
						
						sobbed too. We sat shaking in each other's arms. 'Ilusha,' I said to
						
						him, 'Ilusha, darling.' No one saw us then. God alone saw us; I hope
						
						He will record it to my credit. You must thank your brother, Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch. No, sir, I won't thrash my boy for your satisfaction."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p17">He had gone back to his original tone of resentful buffoonery.
						
						Alyosha felt, though, that he trusted him, and that if there had
						
						been someone else in his, Alyosha's place, the man would not have
						
						spoken so openly and would not have told what he had just told. This
						
						encouraged Alyosha, whose heart was trembling on the verge of tears.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p18">"Ah, how I would like to make friends with your boy!" he cried.
						
						"If you could arrange it- "
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p19">"Certainly, sir," muttered the captain.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p20">"But now listen to something quite different!" Alyosha went on. "I
						
						have a message for you. That same brother of mine, Dmitri, has
						
						insulted his betrothed, too, a noble-hearted girl of whom you have
						
						probably heard. I have a right to tell you of her wrong; I ought to do
						
						so, in fact, for, hearing of the insult done to you and learning all
						
						about your unfortunate position, she commissioned me at once- just
						
						now- to bring you this help from her- but only from her alone, not
						
						from Dmitri, who has abandoned her. Nor from me, his brother, nor from
						
						anyone else, but from her, only from her! She entreats you to accept
						
						her help....You have both been insulted by the same man. She thought
						
						of you only when she had just received a similar insult from him-
						
						similar in its cruelty, I mean. She comes like a sister to help a
						
						brother in misfortune.... She told me to persuade you to take these
						
						two hundred roubles from her, as from a sister, knowing that you are
						
						in such need. No one will know of it, it can give rise to no unjust
						
						slander. There are the two hundred roubles, and I swear you must
						
						take them unless- unless all men are to be enemies on earth! But there
						
						are brothers even on earth.... You have a generous heart... you must
						
						see that, you must," and Alyosha held out two new rainbow-coloured
						
						hundred-rouble notes.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p21">They were both standing at the time by the great stone close to
						
						the fence, and there was no one near. The notes seemed to produce a
						
						tremendous impression on the captain. He started, but at first only
						
						from astonishment. Such an outcome of their conversation was the
						
						last thing he expected. Nothing could have been farther from his
						
						dreams than help from anyone- and such a sum!
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p22">He took the notes, and for a minute he was almost unable to
						
						answer, quite a new expression came into his face.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p23">"That for me? So much money- two hundred roubles! Good heavens!
						
						Why, I haven't seen so much money for the last four years! Mercy on
						
						us! And she says she is a sister.... And is that the truth?"
						
						</p><p id="vii_2-p24">"I swear that all I told you is the truth,"cried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p25">The captain flushed red.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p26">"Listen, my dear, listen. If I take it, I shan't be behaving
						
						like a scoundrel? In your eyes, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I shan't be a
						
						scoundrel? No, Alexey Fyodorovitch, listen, listen," he hurried,
						
						touching Alyosha with both his hands. "You are persuading me to take
						
						it, saying that it's a sister sends it, but inwardly, in your heart
						
						won't you feel contempt for me if I take it, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p27">"No, no, on my salvation I swear I shan't! And no one will ever
						
						know but me- I, you and she, and one other lady, her great friend."
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p28">"Never mind the lady! Listen, Alexey Fyodorovitch, at a moment
						
						like this you must listen, for you can't understand what these two
						
						hundred roubles mean to me now." The poor fellow went on rising
						
						gradually into a sort of incoherent, almost wild enthusiasm. He was
						
						thrown off his balance and talked extremely fast, as though afraid
						
						he would not be allowed to say all he had to say.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p29">"Besides its being honestly acquired from a 'sister,' so highly
						
						respected and revered, do you know that now I can look after mamma and
						
						Nina, my hunchback angel daughter? Doctor Herzenstube came to me in
						
						the kindness of his heart and was examining them both for a whole
						
						hour. 'I can make nothing of it,' said he, but he prescribed a mineral
						
						water which is kept at a chemist's here. He said it would be sure to
						
						do her good, and he ordered baths, too, with some medicine in them.
						
						The mineral water costs thirty copecks, and she'd need to drink
						
						forty bottles perhaps: so I took the prescription and laid it on the
						
						shelf under the ikons, and there it lies. And he ordered hot baths for
						
						Nina with something dissolved in them, morning and evening. But how
						
						can we carry out such a cure in our mansion, without servants, without
						
						help, without a bath, and without water? Nina is rheumatic all over, I
						
						don't think I told you that. All her right side aches at night, she is
						
						in agony, and, would you believe it, the angel bears it without
						
						groaning for fear of waking us. We eat what we can get, and she'll
						
						only take the leavings, what you'd scarcely give to a dog. 'I am not
						
						worth it, I am taking it from you, I am a burden on you,' that's
						
						what her angel eyes try to express. We wait on her, but she doesn't
						
						like it. 'I am a useless cripple, no good to anyone.' As though she
						
						were not worth it, when she is the saving of all of us with her
						
						angelic sweetness. Without her, without her gentle word it would be
						
						hell among us! She softens even Varvara. And don't judge Varvara
						
						harshly either, she is an angel too, she, too, has suffered wrong. She
						
						came to us for the summer, and she brought sixteen roubles she had
						
						earned by lessons and saved up, to go back with to Petersburg in
						
						September, that is now. But we took her money and lived on it, so
						
						now she has nothing to go back with. Though indeed she couldn't go
						
						back, for she has to work for us like a slave. She is like an
						
						overdriven horse with all of us on her back. She waits on us all,
						
						mends and washes, sweeps the floor, puts mamma to bed. And mamma is
						
						capricious and tearful and insane! And now I can get a servant with
						
						this money, you understand, Alexey Fyodorovitch, I can get medicines
						
						for the dear creatures, I can send my student to Petersburg, I can buy
						
						beef, I can feed them properly. Good Lord, but it's a dream!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p30">Alyosha was delighted that he had brought him such happiness and
						
						that the poor fellow had consented to be made happy.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p31">"Stay, Alexey Fyodorovitch, stay," the captain began to talk
						
						with frenzied rapidity, carried away by a new day-dream. "Do you
						
						know that Ilusha and I will perhaps really carry out our dream. We
						
						will buy a horse and cart, a black horse, he insists on its being
						
						black, and we will set off as we pretended the other day. I have an
						
						old friend, a lawyer in K. province, and I heard through a trustworthy
						
						man that if I were to go he'd give me a place as clerk in his
						
						office, so, who knows, maybe he would. So I'd just put mamma and
						
						Nina in the cart, and Ilusha could drive, and I'd walk, I'd walk....
						
						Why, if I only succeed in getting one debt paid that's owing me, I
						
						should have perhaps enough for that too!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p32">"There would be enough!" cried Alyosha. "Katerina Ivanovna will
						
						send you as much more as you need, and you know, I have money too,
						
						take what you want, as you would from a brother, from a friend, you
						
						can give it back later.... (You'll get rich. you'll get rich!) And you
						
						know you couldn't have a better idea than to move to another province!
						
						It would be the saving of you, especially of your boy and you ought to
						
						go quickly, before the winter, before the cold. You must write to us
						
						when you are there, and we will always be brothers... No, it's not a
						
						dream!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p33">Alyosha could have hugged him, he was so pleased. But glancing
						
						at him he stopped short. The man was standing with his neck
						
						outstretched and his lips protruding, with a pale and frenzied face.
						
						His lips were moving as though trying to articulate something; no
						
						sound came, but still his lips moved. It was uncanny.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p34">"What is it?" asked Alyosha, startled.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p35">"Alexey Fyodorovitch... I... you," muttered the captain,
						
						faltering, looking at him with a strange, wild, fixed stare, and an
						
						air of desperate resolution. At the same time there was a sort of grin
						
						on his lips. "I... you, sir... wouldn't you like me to show you a
						
						little trick I know?" he murmured, suddenly, in a firm rapid
						
						whisper, his voice no longer faltering.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p36">"What trick?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p37">"A pretty trick," whispered the captain. His mouth was twisted
						
						on the left side, his left eye was screwed up. He still stared at
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p38">"What is the matter? What trick?" Alyosha cried, now thoroughly
						
						alarmed.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p39">"Why, look," squealed the captain suddenly, and showing him the
						
						two notes which he had been holding by one corner between his thumb
						
						and forefinger during the conversation, he crumpled them up savagely
						
						and squeezed them tight in his right hand. "Do you see, do you see?"
						
						he shrieked, pale and infuriated. And suddenly flinging up his hand,
						
						he threw the crumpled notes on the sand. "Do you see?" he shrieked
						
						again, pointing to them. "Look there!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p40">And with wild fury he began trampling them under his heel, gasping
						
						and exclaiming as he did so:
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p41">"So much for your money! So much for your money! So much for
						
						your money! So much for your money!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p42">Suddenly he darted back and drew himself up before Alyosha, and
						
						his whole figure expressed unutterable pride.
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p43">"Tell those who sent you that the wisp of tow does not sell his
						
						honour," he cried, raising his arm in the air. Then he turned
						
						quickly and began to run; but he had not run five steps before he
						
						turned completely round and kissed his hand to Alyosha. He ran another
						
						five paces and then turned round for the last time. This time his face
						
						was not contorted with laughter, but quivering all over with tears. In
						
						a tearful, faltering, sobbing voice he cried:
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p44">"What should I say to my boy if I took money from you for our
						
						shame?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_2-p45">And then he ran on without turning. Alyosha looked after him,
						
						inexpressibly grieved. Oh, he saw that till the very last moment the
						
						man had not known he would crumple up and fling away the notes. He did
						
						not turn back. Alyosha knew he would not. He would not follow him
						
						and call him back, he knew why. When he was out of sight, Alyosha
						
						picked up the two notes. They were very much crushed and crumpled, and
						
						had been pressed into the sand, but were uninjured and even rustled
						
						like new ones when Alyosha unfolded them and smoothed them out.
						
						After smoothing them out, he folded them up, put them in his pocket
						
						and went to Katerina Ivanovna to report on the success of her
						
						commission.	</p>				
					
					</div4>					
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book V - Pro and Contra" prev="vii_2" next="i_8" id="ii_6">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - The Engagement" prev="ii_6" next="ii_7" id="i_8">
					
						<p id="i_8-p1">MADAME HOHLAKOV was again the first to meet Alyosha. She was
						
						flustered; something important had happened. Katerina Ivanovna's
						
						hysterics had ended in a fainting fit, and then "a terrible, awful
						
						weakness had followed, she lay with her eyes turned up and was
						
						delirious. Now she was in a fever. They had sent for Herzenstube; they
						
						had sent for the aunts. The aunts were already here, but Herzenstube
						
						had not yet come. They were all sitting in her room, waiting. She
						
						was unconscious now, and what if it turned to brain fever!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p2">Madame Hohlakov looked gravely alarmed. "This is serious,
						
						serious," she added at every word, as though nothing that had happened
						
						to her before had been serious. Alyosha listened with distress, and
						
						was beginning to describe his adventures, but she interrupted him at
						
						the first words. She had not time to listen. She begged him to sit
						
						with Lise and wait for her there.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p3">"Lise," she whispered almost in his ear, "Lise has greatly
						
						surprised me just now, dear Alexey Fyodorovitch. She touched me,
						
						too, and so my heart forgives her everything. Only fancy, as soon as
						
						you had gone, she began to be truly remorseful for having laughed at
						
						you to-day and yesterday, though she was not laughing at you, but only
						
						joking. But she was seriously sorry for it, almost ready to cry, so
						
						that I was quite surprised. She has never been really sorry for
						
						laughing at me, but has only made a joke of it. And you know she is
						
						laughing at me every minute. But this time she was in earnest She
						
						thinks a great deal of your opinion, Alexey Fyodorovitch, and don't
						
						take offence or be wounded by her if you can help it. I am never
						
						hard upon her, for she's such a clever little thing. Would you believe
						
						it? She said just now that you were a friend of her childhood, 'the
						
						greatest friend of her childhood'- just think of that- 'greatest
						
						friend'- and what about me? She has very strong feelings and memories,
						
						and, what's more, she uses these phrases, most unexpected words, which
						
						come out all of a sudden when you least expect them. She spoke
						
						lately about a pine-tree, for instance: there used to be a pine-tree
						
						standing in our garden in her early childhood. Very likely it's
						
						standing there still; so there's no need to speak in the past tense.
						
						Pine-trees are not like people, Alexey Fyodorovitch, they don't change
						
						quickly. 'Mamma,' she said, 'I remember this pine tree as in a dream,'
						
						only she said something so original about it that I can't repeat it.
						
						Besides, I've forgotten it. Well, good-bye! I am so worried I feel I
						
						shall go out of my mind. Ah! Alexey Fyodorovitch, I've been out of
						
						my mind twice in my life. Go to Lise, cheer her up, as you always
						
						can so charmingly. Lise," she cried, going to her door, "here I've
						
						brought you Alexey Fyodorovitch, whom you insulted so. He is not at
						
						all angry, I assure you; on the contrary, he is surprised that you
						
						could suppose so."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p4">"Merci, maman. Come in, Alexey Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p5">Alyosha went in. Lise looked rather embarrassed, and at once
						
						flushed crimson. She was evidently ashamed of something, and, as
						
						people always do in such cases, she began immediately talking of other
						
						things, as though they were of absorbing interest to her at the
						
						moment.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p6">"Mamma has just told me all about the two hundred roubles,
						
						Alexey Fyodorovitch, and your taking them to that poor officer...
						
						and she told me all the awful story of how he had been insulted... and
						
						you know, although mamma muddles things... she always rushes from
						
						one thing to another... I cried when I heard. Well, did you give him
						
						the money and how is that poor man getting on?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p7">"The fact is I didn't give it to him, and it's a long story,"
						
						answered Alyosha, as though he, too, could think of nothing but his
						
						regret at having failed, yet Lise saw perfectly well that he, too,
						
						looked away, and that he, too, was trying to talk of other things.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p8">Alyosha sat down to the table and began to tell his story, but
						
						at the first words he lost his embarrassment and gained the whole of
						
						Lise's attention as well. He spoke with deep feeling, under the
						
						influence of the strong impression he had just received, and he
						
						succeeded in telling his story well and circumstantially. In old
						
						days in Moscow he had been fond of coming to Lise and describing to
						
						her what had just happened to him, what he had read, or what he
						
						remembered of his childhood. Sometimes they had made day-dreams and
						
						woven whole romances together- generally cheerful and amusing ones.
						
						Now they both felt suddenly transported to the old days in Moscow, two
						
						years before. Lise was extremely touched by his story. Alyosha
						
						described Ilusha with warm feeling. When he finished describing how
						
						the luckless man trampled on the money, Lise could not help clasping
						
						her hands and crying out:
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p9">"So you didn't give him the money! So you let him run away! Oh,
						
						dear, you ought to have run after him!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p10">"No, Lise; it's better I didn't run after him," said Alyosha,
						
						getting up from his chair and walking thoughtfully across the room.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p11">"How so? How is it better? Now they are without food and their
						
						case is hopeless."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p12">"Not hopeless, for the two hundred roubles will still come to
						
						them. He'll take the money to-morrow. To-morrow he will be sure to
						
						take it," said Alyosha, pacing up and down, pondering. "You see,
						
						Lise," he went on, stopping suddenly before her, "I made one
						
						blunder, but that, even that, is all for the best."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p13">"What blunder, and why is it for the best?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p14">"I'll tell you. He is a man of weak and timorous character; he has
						
						suffered so much and is very good-natured. I keep wondering why he
						
						took offence so suddenly, for I assure you, up to the last minute,
						
						he did not know that he was going to trample on the notes. And I think
						
						now that there was a great deal to offend him... and it could not have
						
						been otherwise in his position.... To begin with, he was sore at
						
						having been so glad of the money in my presence and not having
						
						concealed it from me. If he had been pleased, but not so much; if he
						
						had not shown it; if he had begun affecting scruples and difficulties,
						
						as other people do when they take money, he might still endure- to
						
						take it. But he was too genuinely delighted, and that was
						
						mortifying. Ah, Lise, he is a good and truthful man- that's the
						
						worst of the whole business. All the while he talked, his voice was so
						
						weak, so broken, he talked so fast, so fast, he kept laughing such a
						
						laugh, or perhaps he was crying- yes, I am sure he was crying, he
						
						was so delighted- and he talked about his daughters- and about the
						
						situation he could get in another town.... And when he had poured
						
						out his heart, he felt ashamed at having shown me his inmost soul like
						
						that. So he began to hate me at once. He is one of those awfully
						
						sensitive poor people. What had made him feel most ashamed was that he
						
						had given in too soon and accepted me as a friend, you see. At first
						
						he almost flew at me and tried to intimidate me, but as soon as he saw
						
						the money he had begun embracing me; he kept touching me with his
						
						hands. This must have been how he came to feel it all so
						
						humiliating, and then I made that blunder, a very important one. I
						
						suddenly said to him that if he had not money enough to move to
						
						another town, we would give it to him, and, indeed, I myself would
						
						give him as much as he wanted out of my own money. That struck him all
						
						at once. Why, he thought, did I put myself forward to help him? You
						
						know, Lise, it's awfully hard for a man who has been injured, when
						
						other people look at him as though they were his benefactors....
						
						I've heard that; Father Zossima told me so. I don't know how to put
						
						it, but I have often seen it myself. And I feel like that myself, too.
						
						And the worst of it was that though he did not know, to the very
						
						last minute, that he would trample on the notes, he had a kind of
						
						presentiment of it, I am sure of that. That's just what made him so
						
						ecstatic, that he had that presentiment.... And though it's so
						
						dreadful, it's all for the best. In fact, I believe nothing better
						
						could have happened."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p15">"Why, why could nothing better have happened?" cried Lise, looking
						
						with great surprise at Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p16">"Because if he had taken the money, in an hour after getting home,
						
						he would be crying with mortification, that's just what would have
						
						happened. And most likely he would have come to me early to-morrow,
						
						and perhaps have flung the notes at me and trampled upon them as he
						
						did just now. But now he has gone home awfully proud and triumphant,
						
						though he knows he has 'ruined himself.' So now nothing could be
						
						easier than to make him accept the two hundred roubles by to-morrow,
						
						for he has already vindicated his honour, tossed away the money, and
						
						trampled it under foot.... He couldn't know when he did it that I
						
						should bring it to him again to-morrow, and yet he is in terrible need
						
						of that money. Though he is proud of himself now, yet even to-day
						
						he'll be thinking what a help he has lost. He will think of it more
						
						than ever at night, will dream of it, and by to-morrow morning he
						
						may be ready to run to me to ask forgiveness. It's just then that I'll
						
						appear. 'Here, you are a proud man,' I shall say: 'you have shown
						
						it; but now take the money and forgive us!' And then he will take it!
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p17">Alyosha was carried away with joy as he uttered his last words,
						
						"And then he will take it!" Lise clapped her hands.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p18">"Ah, that's true! I understand that perfectly now. Ah, Alyosha,
						
						how do you know all this? So young and yet he knows what's in the
						
						heart.... I should never have worked it out."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p19">"The great thing now is to persuade him that he is on an equal
						
						footing with us, in spite of his taking money from us," Alyosha went
						
						on in his excitement, "and not only on an equal, but even on a
						
						higher footing."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p20">"'On a higher footing' is charming, Alexey Fyodorovitch; but go
						
						on, go on!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p21">"You mean there isn't such an expression as 'on a higher footing';
						
						but that doesn't matter because- "
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p22">"Oh, no, of course it doesn't matter. Forgive me, Alyosha,
						
						dear.... You know, I scarcely respected you till now- that is I
						
						respected you but on an equal footing; but now I shall begin to
						
						respect you on a higher footing. Don't be angry, dear, at my
						
						joking," she put in at once, with strong feeling. "I am absurd and
						
						small, but you, you! Listen, Alexey Fyodorovitch. Isn't there in all
						
						our analysis- I mean your analysis... no, better call it ours-
						
						aren't we showing contempt for him, for that poor man- in analysing
						
						his soul like this, as it were, from above, eh? In deciding so
						
						certainly that he will take the money?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p23">"No, Lise, it's not contempt," Alyosha answered, as though he
						
						had prepared himself for the question. "I was thinking of that on
						
						the way here. How can it be contempt when we are all like him, when we
						
						are all just the same as he is? For you know we are just the same,
						
						no better. If we are better, we should have been just the same in
						
						his place.... I don't know about you, Lise, but I consider that I have
						
						a sordid soul in many ways, and his soul is not sordid; on the
						
						contrary, full of fine feeling.... No, Lise, I have no contempt for
						
						him. Do you know, Lise, my elder told me once to care for most
						
						people exactly as one would for children, and for some of them as
						
						one would for the sick in hospitals."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p24">"Ah, Alexey Fyodorovitch. dear, let us care for people as we would
						
						for the sick!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p25">"Let us, Lise; I am ready. Though I am not altogether ready in
						
						myself. I am sometimes very impatient and at other times I don't see
						
						things. It's different with you."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p26">"Ah, I don't believe it! Alexey Fyodorovitch, how happy I am!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p27">"I am so glad you say so, Lise."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p28">"Alexey Fyodorovitch, you are wonderfully good, but you are
						
						sometimes sort of formal.... And yet you are not a bit formal
						
						really. Go to the door, open it gently, and see whether mamma is
						
						listening," said Lise, in a nervous, hurried whisper.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p29">Alyosha went, opened the door, and reported that no one was
						
						listening.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p30">"Come here, Alexey Fyodorovitch," Lise went on, flushing redder
						
						and redder. "Give me your hand- that's right. I have to make a great
						
						confession. I didn't write to you yesterday in joke, but in
						
						earnest," and she hid her eyes with her hand. It was evident that
						
						she was greatly ashamed of the confession.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p31">Suddenly she snatched his hand and impulsively kissed it three
						
						times.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p32">"Ah, Lise, what a good thing!" cried Alyosha joyfully. "You
						
						know, I was perfectly sure you were in earnest."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p33">"Sure? Upon my word! She put aside his hand, but did not leave
						
						go of it, blushing hotly, and laughing a little happy laugh. "I kiss
						
						his hand and he says, 'What a good thing!'"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p34">But her reproach was undeserved. Alyosha, too, was greatly
						
						overcome.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p35">"I should like to please you always, Lise, but don't know how to
						
						do it." he muttered, blushing too.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p36">"Alyosha, dear, you are cold and rude. Do you see? He has chosen
						
						me as his wife and is quite settled about it. He is sure I was in
						
						earnest. What a thing to say! Why, that's impertinence- that's what it
						
						is."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p37">"Why, was it wrong of me to feel sure?" Alyosha asked, laughing
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p38">"Ah, Alyosha, on the contrary, it was delightfully right," cried
						
						Lise, looking tenderly and happily at him.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p39">Alyosha stood still, holding her hand in his. Suddenly he
						
						stooped down and kissed her on her lips.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p40">"Oh, what are you doing?" cried Lise. Alyosha was terribly
						
						abashed.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p41">"Oh, forgive me if I shouldn't.... Perhaps I'm awfully
						
						stupid.... You said I was cold, so I kissed you.... But I see it was
						
						stupid."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p42">Lise laughed, and hid her face in her hands. "And in that
						
						dress!" she ejaculated in the midst of her mirth. But she suddenly
						
						ceased laughing and became serious, almost stern.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p43">"Alyosha, we must put off kissing. We are not ready for that
						
						yet, and we shall have a long time to wait," she ended suddenly. "Tell
						
						me rather why you who are so clever, so intellectual, so observant,
						
						choose a little idiot, an invalid like me? Ah, Alyosha, I am awfully
						
						happy, for I don't deserve you a bit."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p44">"You do, Lise. I shall be leaving the monastery altogether in a
						
						few days. If I go into the world, I must marry. I know that. He told
						
						me to marry, too. Whom could I marry better than you- and who would
						
						have me except you? I have been thinking it over. In the first
						
						place, you've known me from a child and you've a great many
						
						qualities I haven't. You are more light-hearted than I am; above
						
						all, you are more innocent than I am. I have been brought into contact
						
						with many, many things already.... Ah, you don't know, but I, too,
						
						am a Karamazov. What does it matter if you do laugh and make jokes,
						
						and at me, too? Go on laughing. I am so glad you do. You laugh like
						
						a little child, but you think like a martyr."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p45">"Like a martyr? How?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p46">"Yes, Lise, your question just now: whether we weren't showing
						
						contempt for that poor man by dissecting his soul- that was the
						
						question of a sufferer.... You see, I don't know how to express it,
						
						but anyone who thinks of such questions is capable of suffering.
						
						Sitting in your invalid chair you must have thought over many things
						
						already."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p47">"Alyosha, give me your hand. Why are you taking it away?" murmured
						
						Lise in a failing voice, weak with happiness. "Listen, Alyosha. What
						
						will you wear when you come out of the monastery? What sort of suit?
						
						Don't laugh, don't be angry, it's very, very important to me."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p48">"I haven't thought about the suit, Lise; But I'll wear whatever
						
						you like."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p49">"I should like you to have a dark blue velvet coat, a white
						
						pique waistcoat, and a soft grey felt hat.... Tell me, did you believe
						
						that I didn't care for you when I said I didn't mean what I wrote?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p50">"No, I didn't believe it."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p51">"Oh, you insupportable person, you are incorrigible."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p52">"You see, I knew that you seemed to care for me, but I pretended
						
						to believe that you didn't care for me to make it easier for you."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p53">"That makes it worse! Worse and better than all! Alyosha, I am
						
						awfully fond of you. Just before you came this morning, I tried my
						
						fortune. I decided I would ask you for my letter, and if you brought
						
						it out calmly and gave it to me (as might have been expected from you)
						
						it would mean that you did not love me at all, that you felt
						
						nothing, and were simply a stupid boy, good for nothing, and that I am
						
						ruined. But you left the letter at home and that cheered me. You
						
						left it behind on purpose, so as not to give it back, because you knew
						
						I would ask for it? That was it, wasn't it?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p54">"Ah, Lise, it was not so a bit. The letter is with me now, and
						
						it was this morning, in this pocket. Here it is."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p55">Alyosha pulled the letter out laughing, and showed it her at a
						
						distance.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p56">"But I am not going to give it to you. Look at it from here."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p57">"Why, then you told a lie? You, a monk, told a lie!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p58">"I told a lie if you like," Alyosha laughed, too. "I told a lie so
						
						as not to give you back the letter. It's very precious to me," he
						
						added suddenly, with strong feeling, and again he flushed. "It
						
						always will be, and I won't give it up to anyone!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p59">Lise looked at him joyfully. "Alyosha," she murmured again,
						
						"look at the door. Isn't mamma listening?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p60">"Very well, Lise, I'll look; but wouldn't it be better not to
						
						look? Why suspect your mother of such meanness?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p61">"What meanness? As for her spying on her daughter, it's her right,
						
						it's not meanness!" cried Lise, firing up. "You may be sure, Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, that when I am a mother, if I have a daughter like
						
						myself I shall certainly spy on her!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p62">"Really, Lise? That's not right."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p63">"Oh, my goodness! What has meanness to do with it? If she were
						
						listening to some ordinary worldly conversation, it would be meanness,
						
						but when her own daughter is shut up with a young man... Listen,
						
						Alyosha, do you know I shall spy upon you as soon as we are married,
						
						and let me tell you I shall open all your letters and read them, so
						
						you may as well be prepared."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p64">"Yes, of course, if so- " muttered Alyosha, "only it's not right."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p65">"Ah, how contemptuous! Alyosha, dear, we won't quarrel the very
						
						first day. I'd better tell you the whole truth. Of course, it's very
						
						wrong to spy on people, and, of course, I am not right and you are,
						
						only I shall spy on you all the same."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p66">"Do, then; you won't find out anything," laughed Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p67">"And Alyosha, will you give in to me? We must decide that too."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p68">"I shall be delighted to, Lise, and certain to, only not in the
						
						most important things. Even if you don't agree with me, I shall do
						
						my duty in the most important things."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p69">"That's right; but let me tell you I am ready to give in to you
						
						not only in the most important matters, but in everything. And I am
						
						ready to vow to do so now- in everything, and for all my life!"
						
						cried Lise fervently, "and I'll do it gladly, gladly! What's more,
						
						I'll swear never to spy on you, never once, never to read one of
						
						your letters. For you are right and I am not. And though I shall be
						
						awfully tempted to spy, I know that I won't do it since you consider
						
						it dishonourable. You are my conscience now.... Listen, Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, why have you been so sad lately- both yesterday and
						
						to-day? I know you have a lot of anxiety and trouble, but I see you
						
						have some special grief besides, some secret one, perhaps?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p70">"Yes, Lise, I have a secret one, too," answered Alyosha
						
						mournfully. "I see you love me, since you guessed that."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p71">"What grief? What about? Can you tell me?" asked Lise with timid
						
						entreaty.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p72">"I'll tell you later, Lise- afterwards," said Alyosha, confused.
						
						"Now you wouldn't understand it perhaps- and perhaps I couldn't
						
						explain it."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p73">"I know your brothers and your father are worrying you, too."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p74">"Yes, my brothers too," murmured Alyosha, pondering.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p75">"I don't like your brother Ivan, Alyosha," said Lise suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p76">He noticed this remark with some surprise, but did not answer it.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p77">"My brothers are destroying themselves," he went on, "my father,
						
						too. And they are destroying others with them. It's 'the primitive
						
						force of the Karamazovs,' as father Paissy said the other day, a
						
						crude, unbridled, earthly force. Does the spirit of God move above
						
						that force? Even that I don't know. I only know that I, too, am a
						
						Karamazov.... Me a monk, a monk! Am I a monk, Lise? You said just
						
						now that I was."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p78">"Yes, I did."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p79">"And perhaps I don't even believe in God."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p80">"You don't believe? What is the matter?" said Lise quietly and
						
						gently. But Alyosha did not answer. There was something too
						
						mysterious, too subjective in these last words of his, perhaps obscure
						
						to himself, but yet torturing him.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p81">"And now on the top of it all, my friend, the best man in the
						
						world is going, is leaving the earth! If you knew, Lise, how bound
						
						up in soul I am with him! And then I shall be left alone.... I shall
						
						come to you, Lise.... For the future we will be together."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p82">"Yes, together, together! Henceforward we shall be always
						
						together, all our lives! Listen, kiss me, I allow you."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p83">Alyosha kissed her.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p84">"Come, now go. Christ be with you!" and she made the sign of the
						
						cross over him. "Make haste back to him while he is alive. I see
						
						I've kept you cruelly. I'll pray to-day for him and you. Alyosha, we
						
						shall be happy! Shall we be happy, shall we?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p85">"I believe we shall, Lise."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p86">Alyosha thought it better not to go in to Madame Hohlakov and
						
						was going out of the house without saying good-bye to her. But no
						
						sooner had he opened the door than he found Madame Hohlakov standing
						
						before him. From the first word Alyosha guessed that she had been
						
						waiting on purpose to meet him.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p87">"Alexey Fyodorovitch, this is awful. This is all childish nonsense
						
						and ridiculous. I trust you won't dream- It's foolishness, nothing but
						
						foolishness!" she said, attacking him at once.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p88">"Only don't tell her that," said Alyosha, "or she will be upset,
						
						and that's bad for her now."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p89">"Sensible advice from a sensible young man. Am I to understand
						
						that you only agreed with her from compassion for her invalid state,
						
						because you didn't want to irritate her by contradiction?"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p90">"Oh no, not at all. I was quite serious in what I said," Alyosha
						
						declared stoutly.
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p91">"To be serious about it is impossible, unthinkable, and in the
						
						first place I shall never be at home to you again, and I shall take
						
						her away, you may be sure of that."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p92">"But why?" asked Alyosha. "It's all so far off. We may have to
						
						wait another year and a half."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p93">"Ah, Alexey Fyodorovitch, that's true, of course, and you'll
						
						have time to quarrel and separate a thousand times in a year and a
						
						half. But I am so unhappy! Though it's such nonsense, it's a great
						
						blow to me. I feel like Famusov in the last scene of Sorrow from
						
						Wit. You are Tchatsky and she is Sofya, and, only fancy, I've run down
						
						to meet you on the stairs, and in the play the fatal scene takes place
						
						on the staircase. I heard it all; I almost dropped. So this is the
						
						explanation of her dreadful night and her hysterics of late! It
						
						means love to the daughter but death to the mother. I might as well be
						
						in my grave at once. And a more serious matter still, what is this
						
						letter she has written? Show it me at once, at once!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p94">"No, there's no need. Tell me, how is Katerina Ivanovna now? I
						
						must know."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p95">"She still lies in delirium; she has not regained consciousness.
						
						Her aunts are here; but they do nothing but sigh and give themselves
						
						airs. Herzenstube came, and he was so alarmed that I didn't know
						
						what to do for him. I nearly sent for a doctor to look after him. He
						
						was driven home in my carriage. And on the top of it all, you and this
						
						letter! It's true nothing can happen for a year and a half. In the
						
						name of all that's holy, in the name of your dying elder, show me that
						
						letter, Alexey Fyodorovitch. I'm her mother. Hold it in your hand,
						
						if you like, and I will read it so."
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p96">"No, I won't show it to you. Even if she sanctioned it, I
						
						wouldn't. I am coming to-morrow, and if you like, we can talk over
						
						many things, but now good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="i_8-p97">And Alyosha ran downstairs and into the street.		</p>			
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - Smerdyakov with a Guitar" prev="i_8" next="iii_5" id="ii_7">
					
							<p id="ii_7-p1">HE had no time to lose indeed. Even while he was saying good-bye
							
							to Lise, the thought had struck him that he must attempt some
							
							stratagem to find his brother Dmitri, who was evidently keeping out of
							
							his way. It was getting late, nearly three o'clock. Alyosha's whole
							
							soul turned to the monastery, to his dying saint, but the necessity of
							
							seeing Dmitri outweighed everything. The conviction that a great
							
							inevitable catastrophe was about to happen grew stronger in
							
							Alyosha's mind with every hour. What that catastrophe was, and what he
							
							would say at that moment to his brother, he could perhaps not have
							
							said definitely. "Even if my benefactor must die without me, anyway
							
							I won't have to reproach myself all my life with the thought that I
							
							might have saved something and did not, but passed by and hastened
							
							home. If I do as I intend, I shall be following his great precept."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p2">His plan was to catch his brother Dmitri unawares, to climb over
							
							the fence, as he had the day before, get into the garden and sit in
							
							the summer-house. If Dmitri were not there, thought Alyosha, he
							
							would not announce himself to Foma or the women of the house, but
							
							would remain hidden in the summer-house, even if he had to wait
							
							there till evening. If, as before, Dmitri were lying in wait for
							
							Grushenka to come, he would be very likely to come to the
							
							summer-house. Alyosha did not, however, give much thought to the
							
							details of his plan, but resolved to act upon it, even if it meant not
							
							getting back to the monastery that day.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p3">Everything happened without hindrance, he climbed over the
							
							hurdle almost in the same spot as the day before, and stole into the
							
							summer-house unseen. He did not want to be noticed. The woman of the
							
							house and Foma too, if he were here, might be loyal to his brother and
							
							obey his instructions, and so refuse to let Alyosha come into the
							
							garden, or might warn Dmitri that he was being sought and inquired
							
							for.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p4">There was no one in the summer-house. Alyosha sat down and began
							
							to wait. He looked round the summer-house, which somehow struck him as
							
							a great deal more ancient than before. Though the day was just as fine
							
							as yesterday, it seemed a wretched little place this time. There was a
							
							circle on the table, left no doubt from the glass of brandy having
							
							been spilt the day before. Foolish and irrelevant ideas strayed
							
							about his mind, as they always do in a time of tedious waiting. He
							
							wondered, for instance, why he had sat down precisely in the same
							
							place as before, why not in the other seat. At last he felt very
							
							depressed- depressed by suspense and uncertainty. But he had not sat
							
							there more than a quarter of an hour, when he suddenly heard the thrum
							
							of a guitar somewhere quite close. People were sitting, or had only
							
							just sat down, somewhere in the bushes not more than twenty paces
							
							away. Alyosha suddenly recollected that on coming out of the
							
							summer-house the day before, he had caught a glimpse of an old green
							
							low garden-seat among the bushes on the left, by the fence. The people
							
							must be sitting on it now. Who were they?
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p5">A man's voice suddenly began singing in a sugary falsetto,
							
							accompanying himself on the guitar:</p><p id="ii_7-p6" /><p id="ii_7-p7" />
							
							
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_7-p8">With invincible force</p>
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_7-p9">I am bound to my dear.</p>
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_7-p10">O Lord, have mercy</p>
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_7-p11">On her and on me!</p>
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_7-p12">On her and on me!</p>
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_7-p13">On her and on me!</p>
							
							
							
								<p id="ii_7-p14">The voice ceased. It was a lackey's tenor and a lackey's song.
							
							Another voice, a woman's, suddenly asked insinuatingly and
							
							bashfully, though with mincing affectation:
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p15">"Why haven't you been to see us for so long, Pavel Fyodorovitch?
							
							Why do you always look down upon us?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p16">"Not at all answered a man's voice politely, but with emphatic
							
							dignity. It was clear that the man had the best of the position, and
							
							that the woman was making advances. "I believe the man must be
							
							Smerdyakov," thought Alyosha, "from his voice. And the lady must be
							
							the daughter of the house here, who has come from Moscow, the one
							
							who wears the dress with a tail and goes to Marfa for soup."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p17">"I am awfully fond of verses of all kinds, if they rhyme," the
							
							woman's voice continued. "Why don't you go on?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p18">The man sang again:</p><p id="ii_7-p19" /><p id="ii_7-p20" />
							
							
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p21">What do I care for royal wealth</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p22">If but my dear one be in health?</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p23">Lord have mercy</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p24">On her and on me!</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p25">On her and on me!</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p26">On her and on me!</p>
							
							
							
								<p id="ii_7-p27">"It was even better last time," observed the woman's voice. "You
							
							sang 'If my darling be in health'; it sounded more tender. I suppose
							
							you've forgotten to-day."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p28">"Poetry is rubbish!" said Smerdyakov curtly.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p29">"Oh, no! I am very fond of poetry."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p30">"So far as it's poetry, it's essential rubbish. Consider yourself,
							
							who ever talks in rhyme? And if we were all to talk in rhyme, even
							
							though it were decreed by government, we shouldn't say much, should
							
							we? Poetry is no good, Marya Kondratyevna."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p31">"How clever you are! How is it you've gone so deep into
							
							everything?" The woman's voice was more and more insinuating.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p32">"I could have done better than that. I could have known more
							
							than that, if it had not been for my destiny from my childhood up. I
							
							would have shot a man in a duel if he called me names because I am
							
							descended from a filthy beggar and have no father. And they used to
							
							throw it in my teeth in Moscow. It had reached them from here,
							
							thanks to Grigory Vassilyevitch. Grigory Vassilyevitch blames me for
							
							rebelling against my birth, but I would have sanctioned their
							
							killing me before I was born that I might not have come into the world
							
							at all. They used to say in the market, and your mamma too, with great
							
							lack of delicacy, set off telling me that her hair was like a mat on
							
							her head, and that she was short of five foot by a wee bit. Why talk
							
							of a wee bit while she might have said 'a little bit,' like everyone
							
							else? She wanted to make it touching, a regular peasant's feeling. Can
							
							a Russian peasant be said to feel, in comparison with an educated man?
							
							He can't be said to have feeling at all, in his ignorance. From my
							
							childhood up when I hear 'a wee bit,' I am ready to burst with rage. I
							
							hate all Russia, Marya Kondratyevna."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p33">"If you'd been a cadet in the army, or a young hussar, you
							
							wouldn't have talked like that, but would have drawn your sabre to
							
							defend all Russia."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p34">"I don't want to be a hussar, Marya Kondratyevna, and, what's
							
							more, I should like to abolish all soldiers."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p35">"And when an enemy comes, who is going to defend us?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p36">"There's no need of defence. In 1812 there was a great invasion of
							
							Russia by Napoleon, first Emperor of the French, father of the present
							
							one, and it would have been a good thing if they had conquered us. A
							
							clever nation would have conquered a very stupid one and annexed it.
							
							We should have had quite different institutions."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p37">"Are they so much better in their own country than we are? I
							
							wouldn't change a dandy I know of for three young englishmen,"
							
							observed Marya Kondratyevna tenderly, doubtless accompanying her words
							
							with a most languishing glance.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p38">"That's as one prefers."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p39">"But you are just like a foreigner- just like a most gentlemanly
							
							foreigner. I tell you that, though it makes me bashful."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p40">"If you care to know, the folks there and ours here are just alike
							
							in their vice. They are swindlers, only there the scoundrel wears
							
							polished boots and here he grovels in filth and sees no harm in it.
							
							The Russian people want thrashing, as Fyodor Pavlovitch said very
							
							truly yesterday, though he is mad, and all his children."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p41">"You said yourself you had such a respect for Ivan Fyodorovitch."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p42">"But he said I was a stinking lackey. He thinks that I might be
							
							unruly. He is mistaken there. If I had a certain sum in my pocket, I
							
							would have left here long ago. Dmitri Fyodorovitch is lower than any
							
							lackey in his behaviour, in his mind, and in his poverty. He doesn't
							
							know how to do anything, and yet he is respected by everyone. I may be
							
							only a soup-maker, but with luck I could open a cafe restaurant in
							
							Petrovka, in Moscow, for my cookery is something special, and
							
							there's no one in Moscow, except the foreigners, whose cookery is
							
							anything special. Dmitri Fyodorovitch is a beggar, but if he were to
							
							challenge the son of the first count in the country, he'd fight him.
							
							Though in what way is he better than I am? For he is ever so much
							
							stupider than I am. Look at the money he has wasted without any need!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p43">"It must be lovely, a duel," Marya Kondratyevna observed suddenly.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p44">"How so?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p45">"It must be so dreadful and so brave, especially when young
							
							officers with pistols in their hands pop at one another for the sake
							
							of some lady. A perfect picture! Ah, if only girls were allowed to
							
							look on, I'd give anything to see one!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p46">"It's all very well when you are firing at someone, but when he is
							
							firing straight in your mug, you must feel pretty silly. You'd be glad
							
							to run away, Marya Kondratyevna."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p47">"You don't mean you would run away?" But Smerdyakov did not
							
							deign to reply. After a moment's silence the guitar tinkled again, and
							
							he sang again in the same falsetto:</p><p id="ii_7-p48" /><p id="ii_7-p49" />
							
							
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p50">Whatever you may say,</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p51">I shall go far away.</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p52">Life will be bright and gay</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p53">In the city far away.</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p54">I shall not grieve,</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p55">I shall not grieve at all,</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="ii_7-p56">I don't intend to grieve at all.</p>
							
							
							
								<p id="ii_7-p57">Then something unexpected happened. Alyosha suddenly sneezed. They
							
							were silent. Alyosha got up and walked towards them. He found
							
							Smerdyakov dressed up and wearing polished boots, his hair pomaded,
							
							and perhaps curled. The guitar lay on the garden-seat. His companion
							
							was the daughter of the house, wearing a light-blue dress with a train
							
							two yards long. She was young and would not have been bad-looking, but
							
							that her face was so round and terribly freckled.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p58">"Will my brother Dmitri soon be back? asked Alyosha with as much
							
							composure as he could.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p59">Smerdyakov got up slowly; Marya Kondratyevna rose too.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p60">"How am I to know about Dmitri Fyodorovitch? It's not as if I were
							
							his keeper," answered Smerdyakov quietly, distinctly, and
							
							superciliously.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p61">"But I simply asked whether you do know?" Alyosha explained.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p62">"I know nothing of his whereabouts and don't want to."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p63">"But my brother told me that you let him know all that goes on
							
							in the house, and promised to let him know when Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna comes."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p64">Smerdyakov turned a deliberate, unmoved glance upon him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p65">"And how did you get in this time, since the gate was bolted an
							
							hour ago?" he asked, looking at Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p66">"I came in from the back-alley, over the fence, and went
							
							straight to the summer-house. I hope you'll forgive me, he added
							
							addressing Marya Kondratyevna. "I was in a hurry to find my brother."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p67">"Ach, as though we could take it amiss in you!" drawled Marya
							
							Kondratyevna, flattered by Alyosha's apology. "For Dmitri Fyodorovitch
							
							often goes to the summer-house in that way. We don't know he is here
							
							and he is sitting in the summer-house."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p68">"I am very anxious to find him, or to learn from you where he is
							
							now. Believe me, it's on business of great importance to him."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p69">"He never tells us," lisped Marya Kondratyevna.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p70">"Though I used to come here as a friend," Smerdyakov began
							
							again, "Dmitri Fyodorovitch has pestered me in a merciless way even
							
							here by his incessant questions about the master. 'What news?' he'll
							
							ask. 'What's going on in there now? Who's coming and going?' and can't
							
							I tell him something more. Twice already he's threatened me with death
							
							
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p71">"With death?" Alyosha exclaimed in surprise.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p72">"Do you suppose he'd think much of that, with his temper, which
							
							you had a chance of observing yourself yesterday? He says if I let
							
							Agrafena Alexandrovna in and she passes the night there, I'll be the
							
							first to suffer for it. I am terribly afraid of him, and if I were not
							
							even more afraid of doing so, I ought to let the police know. God only
							
							knows what he might not do!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p73">"His honour said to him the other day, 'I'll pound you in a
							
							mortar!'" added Marya Kondratyevna.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p74">"Oh, if it's pounding in a mortar, it may be only talk,"
							
							observed Alyosha. "If I could meet him, I might speak to him about
							
							that too."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p75">"Well, the only thing I can tell you is this," said Smerdyakov, as
							
							though thinking better of it; "I am here as an old friend and
							
							neighbour, and it would be odd if I didn't come. On the other hand,
							
							Ivan Fyodorovitch sent me first thing this morning to your brother's
							
							lodging in Lake Street, without a letter, but with a message to Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch to go to dine with him at the restaurant here, in the
							
							marketplace. I went, but didn't find Dmitri Fyodorovitch at home,
							
							though it was eight o'clock. 'He's been here, but he is quite gone,'
							
							those were the very words of his landlady. It's as though there was an
							
							understanding between them. Perhaps at this moment he is in the
							
							restaurant with Ivan Fyodorovitch, for Ivan Fyodorovitch has not
							
							been home to dinner and Fyodor Pavlovitch dined alone an hour ago, and
							
							is gone to lie down. But I beg you most particularly not to speak of
							
							me and of what I have told you, for he'd kill me for nothing at all."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p76">"Brother Ivan invited Dmitri to the restaurant to-day?" repeated
							
							Alyosha quickly.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p77">"That's so."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p78">"The Metropolis tavern in the marketplace?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p79">"The very same."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p80">"That's quite likely," cried Alyosha, much excited. "Thank you,
							
							Smerdyakov; that's important. I'll go there at once."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p81">"Don't betray me," Smerdyakov called after him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p82">"Oh, no, I'll go to the tavern as though by chance. Don't be
							
							anxious."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p83">"But wait a minute, I'll open the gate to you," cried Marya
							
							Kondratyevna.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p84">"No; it's a short cut, I'll get over the fence again."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p85">What he had heard threw Alyosha into great agitation. He ran to
							
							the tavern. It was impossible for him to go into the tavern in his
							
							monastic dress, but he could inquire at the entrance for his
							
							brothers and call them down. But just as he reached the tavern, a
							
							window was flung open, and his brother Ivan called down to him from
							
							it.
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p86">"Alyosha, can't you come up here to me? I shall be awfully
							
							grateful."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p87">"To be sure I can, only I don't quite know whether in this
							
							dress- "
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p88">"But I am in a room apart. Come up the steps; I'll run down to
							
							meet you."
							
								</p><p id="ii_7-p89">A minute later Alyosha was sitting beside his brother. Ivan was
							
							alone dining.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - The Brothers Make Friends" prev="ii_7" next="iv_4" id="iii_5">
					
					
							<p id="iii_5-p1">IVAN was not, however, in a separate room, but only in a place
							
							shut off by a screen, so that it was unseen by other people in the
							
							room. It was the first room from the entrance with a buffet along
							
							the wall. Waiters were continually darting to and fro in it. The
							
							only customer in the room was an old retired military man drinking tea
							
							in a corner. But there was the usual bustle going on in the other
							
							rooms of the tavern; there were shouts for the waiters, the sound of
							
							popping corks, the click of billiard balls, the drone of the organ.
							
							Alyosha knew that Ivan did not usually visit this tavern and
							
							disliked taverns in general. So he must have come here, he
							
							reflected, simply to meet Dmitri by arrangement. Yet Dmitri was not
							
							there.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p2">"Shall I order you fish, soup, or anything. You don't live on
							
							tea alone, I suppose," cried Ivan, apparently delighted at having
							
							got hold of Alyosha. He had finished dinner and was drinking tea.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p3">"Let me have soup, and tea afterwards, I am hungry," said
							
							Alyosha gaily.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p4">"And cherry jam? They have it here. You remember how you used to
							
							love cherry jam when you were little?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p5">"You remember that? Let me have jam too, I like it still."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p6">Ivan rang for the waiter and ordered soup, jam, and tea.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p7">"I remember everything, Alyosha, I remember you till you were
							
							eleven, I was nearly fifteen. There's such a difference between
							
							fifteen and eleven that brothers are never companions at those ages. I
							
							don't know whether I was fond of you even. When I went away to
							
							Moscow for the first few years I never thought of you at all. Then,
							
							when you came to Moscow yourself, we only met once somewhere, I
							
							believe. And now I've been here more than three months, and so far
							
							we have scarcely said a word to each other. To-morrow I am going away,
							
							and I was just thinking as I sat here how I could see you to say
							
							good-bye and just then you passed."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p8">"Were you very anxious to see me, then?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p9">"Very. I want to get to know you once for all, and I want you to
							
							know me. And then to say good-bye. I believe it's always best to get
							
							to know people just before leaving them. I've noticed how you've
							
							been looking at me these three months. There has been a continual look
							
							of expectation in your eyes, and I can't endure that. That's how it is
							
							I've kept away from you. But in the end I have learned to respect you.
							
							The little man stands firm, I thought. Though I am laughing, I am
							
							serious. You do stand firm, don't you? I like people who are firm like
							
							that whatever it is they stand by, even if they are such little
							
							fellows as you. Your expectant eyes ceased to annoy me, I grew fond of
							
							them in the end, those expectant eyes. You seem to love me for some
							
							reason, Alyosha?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p10">"I do love you, Ivan. Dmitri says of you- Ivan is a tomb! I say of
							
							you, Ivan is a riddle. You are a riddle to me even now. But I
							
							understand something in you, and I did not understand it till this
							
							morning."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p11">"What's that?" laughed Ivan.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p12">"You won't be angry?" Alyosha laughed too.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p13">"Well?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p14">"That you are just as young as other young men of three and
							
							twenty, that you are just a young and fresh and nice boy, green in
							
							fact! Now, have I insulted you dreadfully?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p15">"On the contrary, I am struck by a coincidence," cried Ivan,
							
							warmly and good-humouredly. "Would you believe it that ever since that
							
							scene with her, I have thought of nothing else but my youthful
							
							greenness, and just as though you guessed that, you begin about it. Do
							
							you know I've been sitting here thinking to myself: that if I didn't
							
							believe in life, if I lost faith in the woman I love, lost faith in
							
							the order of things, were convinced, in fact, that everything is a
							
							disorderly, damnable, and perhaps devil-ridden chaos, if I were struck
							
							by every horror of man's disillusionment- still I should want to
							
							live and, having once tasted of the cup, I would not turn away from it
							
							till I had drained it! At thirty, though, I shall be sure to leave the
							
							cup, even if I've not emptied it, and turn away- where I don't know.
							
							But till I am thirty, I know that my youth will triumph over
							
							everything- every disillusionment, every disgust with life. I've asked
							
							myself many times whether there is in the world any despair that would
							
							overcome this frantic and perhaps unseemly thirst for life in me,
							
							and I've come to the conclusion that there isn't, that is till I am
							
							thirty, and then I shall lose it of myself, I fancy. Some drivelling
							
							consumptive moralists- and poets especially- often call that thirst
							
							for life base. It's a feature of the Karamazovs, it's true, that
							
							thirst for life regardless of everything; you have it no doubt too,
							
							but why is it base? The centripetal force on our planet is still
							
							fearfully strong, Alyosha. I have a longing for life, and I go on
							
							living in spite of logic. Though I may not believe in the order of the
							
							universe, yet I love the sticky little leaves as they open in
							
							spring. I love the blue sky, I love some people, whom one loves you
							
							know sometimes without knowing why. I love some great deeds done by
							
							men, though I've long ceased perhaps to have faith in them, yet from
							
							old habit one's heart prizes them. Here they have brought the soup for
							
							you, eat it, it will do you good. It's first-rate soup, they know
							
							how to make it here. I want to travel in Europe, Alyosha, I shall
							
							set off from here. And yet I know that I am only going to a graveyard,
							
							but it's a most precious graveyard, that's what it is! Precious are
							
							the dead that lie there, every stone over them speaks of such
							
							burning life in the past, of such passionate faith in their work,
							
							their truth, their struggle and their science, that I know I shall
							
							fall on the ground and kiss those stones and weep over them; though
							
							I'm convinced in my heart that it's long been nothing but a graveyard.
							
							And I shall not weep from despair, but simply because I shall be happy
							
							in my tears, I shall steep my soul in emotion. I love the sticky
							
							leaves in spring, the blue sky- that's all it is. It's not a matter of
							
							intellect or logic, it's loving with one's inside, with one's stomach.
							
							One loves the first strength of one's youth. Do you understand
							
							anything of my tirade, Alyosha?" Ivan laughed suddenly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p16">"I understand too well, Ivan. One longs to love with one's inside,
							
							with one's stomach. You said that so well and I am awfully glad that
							
							you have such a longing for life," cried Alyosha. "I think everyone
							
							should love life above everything in the world."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p17">"Love life more than the meaning of it?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p18">"Certainly, love it, regardless of logic as you say, it must be
							
							regardless of logic, and it's only then one will understand the
							
							meaning of it. I have thought so a long time. Half your work is
							
							done, Ivan, you love life, now you've only to try to do the second
							
							half and you are saved."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p19">"You are trying to save me, but perhaps I am not lost! And what
							
							does your second half mean?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p20">"Why, one has to raise up your dead, who perhaps have not died
							
							after all. Come, let me have tea. I am so glad of our talk, Ivan."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p21">"I see you are feeling inspired. I am awfully fond of such
							
							professions de foi* from such- novices. You are a steadfast person,
							
							Alexey. Is it true that you mean to leave the monastery?"
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p22">* Professions of faith.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p23">"Yes, my elder sends me out into the world."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p24">"We shall see each other then in the world. We shall meet before I
							
							am thirty, when I shall begin to turn aside from the cup. Father
							
							doesn't want to turn aside from his cup till he is seventy, he
							
							dreams of hanging on to eighty in fact, so he says. He means it only
							
							too seriously, though he is a buffoon. He stands on a firm rock,
							
							too, he stands on his sensuality though after we are thirty, indeed,
							
							there may be nothing else to stand on.... But to hang on to seventy is
							
							nasty, better only to thirty; one might retain 'a shadow of
							
							nobility' by deceiving oneself. Have you seen Dmitri to-day?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p25">"No, but I saw Smerdyakov," and Alyosha rapidly, though
							
							minutely, described his meeting with Smerdyakov. Ivan began
							
							listening anxiously and questioned him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p26">"But he begged me not to tell Dmitri that he had told me about
							
							him," added Alyosha. Ivan frowned and pondered.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p27">"Are you frowning on Smerdyakov's account?" asked Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p28">"Yes, on his account. Damn him, I certainly did want to see
							
							Dmitri, but now there's no need," said Ivan reluctantly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p29">"But are you really going so soon, brother?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p30">"What of Dmitri and father? how will it end?" asked Alyosha
							
							anxiously.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p31">"You are always harping upon it! What have I to do with it? Am I
							
							my brother Dmitri's keeper?" Ivan snapped irritably, but then he
							
							suddenly smiled bitterly. "Cain's answer about his murdered brother,
							
							wasn't it? Perhaps that's what you're thinking at this moment? Well
							
							damn it all, I can't stay here to be their keeper, can I? I've
							
							finished what I had to do, and I am going. Do you imagine I am jealous
							
							of Dmitri, that I've been trying to steal his beautiful Katerina
							
							Ivanovna for the last three months? Nonsense, I had business of my
							
							own. I finished it. I am going. I finished it just now, you were
							
							witness."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p32">"At Katerina Ivanovna's?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p33">"Yes, and I've released myself once for all. And after all, what
							
							have I to do with Dmitri? Dmitri doesn't come in. I had my own
							
							business to settle with Katerina Ivanovna. You know, on the
							
							contrary, that Dmitri behaved as though there was an understanding
							
							between us. I didn't ask to do it, but he solemnly handed her over
							
							to me and gave us his blessing. It's all too funny. Ah, Alyosha, if
							
							you only knew how light my heart is now! Would you believe it, I sat
							
							here eating my dinner and was nearly ordering champagne to celebrate
							
							my first hour of freedom. Tfoo! It's been going on nearly six
							
							months, and all at once I've thrown it off. I could never have guessed
							
							even yesterday, how easy it would be to put an end to it if I wanted."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p34">"You are speaking of your love, Ivan?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p35">"Of my love, if you like. I fell in love with the young lady, I
							
							worried myself over her and she worried me. I sat watching over her...
							
							and all at once it's collapsed! I spoke this morning with inspiration,
							
							but I went away and roared with laughter. Would you believe it? Yes,
							
							it's the literal truth."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p36">"You seem very merry about it now," observed Alyosha, looking into
							
							his face, which had suddenly grown brighter.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p37">"But how could I tell that I didn't care for her a bit! Ha ha!
							
							It appears after all I didn't. And yet how she attracted me! How
							
							attractive she was just now when I made my speech! And do you know she
							
							attracts me awfully even now, yet how easy it is to leave her. Do
							
							you think I am boasting?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p38">"No, only perhaps it wasn't love."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p39">"Alyosha," laughed Ivan, "don't make reflections about love,
							
							it's unseemly for you. How you rushed into the discussion this
							
							morning! I've forgotten to kiss you for it.... But how she tormented
							
							me! It certainly was sitting by a 'laceration.' Ah, she knew how I
							
							loved her! She loved me and not Dmitri," Ivan insisted gaily. "Her
							
							feeling for Dmitri was simply a self-laceration. All I told her just
							
							now was perfectly true, but the worst of it is, it may take her
							
							fifteen or twenty years to find out that she doesn't care for
							
							Dmitri, and loves me whom she torments, and perhaps she may never find
							
							it out at all, in spite of her lesson to-day. Well, it's better so;
							
							I can simply go away for good. By the way, how is she now? What
							
							happened after I departed?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p40">Alyosha told him she had been hysterical, and that she was now, he
							
							heard, unconscious and delirious.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p41">"Isn't Madame Hohlakov laying it on?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p42">"I think not."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p43">"I must find out. Nobody dies of hysterics, though. They don't
							
							matter. God gave woman hysterics as a relief. I won't go to her at
							
							all. Why push myself forward again?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p44">"But you told her that she had never cared for you."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p45">"I did that on purpose. Alyosha, shall I call for some
							
							champagne? Let us drink to my freedom. Ah, if only you knew how glad I
							
							am!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p46">"No, brother, we had better not drink," said Alyosha suddenly.
							
							"Besides I feel somehow depressed."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p47">"Yes, you've been depressed a long time, I've noticed it."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p48">"Have you settled to go to-morrow morning, then?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p49">"Morning? I didn't say I should go in the morning.... But
							
							perhaps it may be the morning. Would you believe it, I dined here
							
							to-day only to avoid dining with the old man, I loathe him so. I
							
							should have left long ago, so far as he is concerned. But why are
							
							you so worried about my going away? We've plenty of time before I
							
							go, an eternity!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p50">"If you are going away to-morrow, what do you mean by an
							
							eternity?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p51">"But what does it matter to us?" laughed Ivan. "We've time
							
							enough for our talk, for what brought us here. Why do you look so
							
							surprised? Answer: why have we met here? To talk of my love for
							
							Katerina Ivanovna, of the old man and Dmitri? of foreign travel? of
							
							the fatal position of Russia? of the Emperor Napoleon? Is that it?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p52">"No."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p53">"Then you know what for. It's different for other people; but we
							
							in our green youth have to settle the eternal questions first of
							
							all. That's what we care about. Young Russia is talking about
							
							nothing but the eternal questions now. just when the old folks are all
							
							taken up with practical questions. Why have you been looking at me
							
							in expectation for the last three months? To ask me, 'What do you
							
							believe, or don't you believe at all?' That's what your eyes have been
							
							meaning for these three months, haven't they?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p54">"Perhaps so," smiled Alyosha. "You are not laughing at me, now,
							
							Ivan?
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p55">"Me laughing! I don't want to wound my little brother who has been
							
							watching me with such expectation for three months. Alyosha, look
							
							straight at me! Of course, I am just such a little boy as you are,
							
							only not a novice. And what have Russian boys been doing up till
							
							now, some of them, I mean? In this stinking tavern, for instance,
							
							here, they meet and sit down in a corner. They've never met in their
							
							lives before and, when they go out of the tavern, they won't meet
							
							again for forty years. And what do they talk about in that momentary
							
							halt in the tavern? Of the eternal questions, of the existence of
							
							God and immortality. And those who do not believe in God talk of
							
							socialism or anarchism, of the transformation of all humanity on a new
							
							pattern, so that it all comes to the same, they're the same
							
							questions turned inside out. And masses, masses of the most original
							
							Russian boys do nothing but talk of the eternal questions! Isn't it
							
							so?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p56">"Yes, for real Russians the questions of God's existence and of
							
							immortality, or, as you say, the same questions turned inside out,
							
							come first and foremost, of course, and so they should," said Alyosha,
							
							still watching his brother with the same gentle and inquiring smile.
							
								"Well, Alyosha, it's sometimes very unwise to be a Russian at all,
							
							but anything stupider than the way Russian boys spend their time one
							
							can hardly imagine. But there's one Russian boy called Alyosha I am
							
							awfully fond of."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p57">"How nicely you put that in!" Alyosha laughed suddenly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p58">"Well, tell me where to begin, give your orders. The existence
							
							of God, eh?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p59">"Begin where you like. You declared yesterday at father's that
							
							there was no God." Alyosha looked searchingly at his brother.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p60">"I said that yesterday at dinner on purpose to tease you and I saw
							
							your eyes glow. But now I've no objection to discussing with you,
							
							and I say so very seriously. I want to be friends with you, Alyosha,
							
							for I have no friends and want to try it. Well, only fancy, perhaps
							
							I too accept God," laughed Ivan; "that's a surprise for you, isn't
							
							it?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p61">"Yes of course, if you are not joking now."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p62">"Joking? I was told at the elder's yesterday that I was joking.
							
							You know, dear boy, there was an old sinner in the eighteenth
							
							century who declared that, if there were no God, he would have to be
							
							invented. S'il n'existait pas Dieu, il faudrait l'inventer. And man
							
							has actually invented God. And what's strange, what would be
							
							marvellous, is not that God should really exist; the marvel is that
							
							such an idea, the idea of the necessity of God, could enter the head
							
							of such a savage, vicious beast as man. So holy it is, so touching, so
							
							wise and so great a credit it does to man. As for me, I've long
							
							resolved not to think whether man created God or God man. And I
							
							won't go through all the axioms laid down by Russian boys on that
							
							subject, all derived from European hypotheses; for what's a hypothesis
							
							there is an axiom with the Russian boy, and not only with the boys but
							
							with their teachers too, for our Russian professors are often just the
							
							same boys themselves. And so I omit all the hypotheses. For what are
							
							we aiming at now? I am trying to explain as quickly as possible my
							
							essential nature, that is what manner of man I am, what I believe
							
							in, and for what I hope, that's it, isn't it? And therefore I tell you
							
							that I accept God simply. But you must note this: if God exists and if
							
							He really did create the world, then, as we all know, He created it
							
							according to the geometry of Euclid and the human mind with the
							
							conception of only three dimensions in space. Yet there have been
							
							and still are geometricians and philosophers, and even some of the
							
							most distinguished, who doubt whether the whole universe, or to
							
							speak more widely, the whole of being, was only created in Euclid's
							
							geometry; they even dare to dream that two parallel lines, which
							
							according to Euclid can never meet on earth, may meet somewhere in
							
							infinity. I have come to the conclusion that, since I can't understand
							
							even that, I can't expect to understand about God. I acknowledge
							
							humbly that I have no faculty for settling such questions, I have a
							
							Euclidian earthly mind, and how could I solve problems that are not of
							
							this world? And I advise you never to think about it either, my dear
							
							Alyosha, especially about God, whether He exists or not. All such
							
							questions are utterly inappropriate for a mind created with an idea of
							
							only three dimensions. And so I accept God and am glad to, and
							
							what's more, I accept His wisdom, His purpose which are utterly beyond
							
							our ken; I believe in the underlying order and the meaning of life;
							
							I believe in the eternal harmony in which they say we shall one day be
							
							blended. I believe in the Word to Which the universe is striving,
							
							and Which Itself was 'with God,' and Which Itself is God and so on,
							
							and so on, to infinity. There are all sorts of phrases for it. I
							
							seem to be on the right path, don't I'? Yet would you believe it, in
							
							the final result I don't accept this world of God's, and, although I
							
							know it exists, I don't accept it at all. It's not that I don't accept
							
							God, you must understand, it's the world created by Him I don't and
							
							cannot accept. Let me make it plain. I believe like a child that
							
							suffering will be healed and made up for, that all the humiliating
							
							absurdity of human contradictions will vanish like a pitiful mirage,
							
							like the despicable fabrication of the impotent and infinitely small
							
							Euclidian mind of man, that in the world's finale, at the moment of
							
							eternal harmony, something so precious will come to pass that it
							
							will suffice for all hearts, for the comforting of all resentments,
							
							for the atonement of all the crimes of humanity, of all the blood
							
							they've shed; that it will make it not only possible to forgive but to
							
							justify all that has happened with men- but thought all that may
							
							come to pass, I don't accept it. I won't accept it. Even if parallel
							
							lines do meet and I see it myself, I shall see it and say that they've
							
							met, but still I won't accept it. That's what's at the root of me,
							
							Alyosha; that's my creed. I am in earnest in what I say. I began our
							
							talk as stupidly as I could on purpose, but I've led up to my
							
							confession, for that's all you want. You didn't want to hear about
							
							God, but only to know what the brother you love lives by. And so
							
							I've told you."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p63">Ivan concluded his long tirade with marked and unexpected feeling.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p64">"And why did you begin 'as stupidly as you could'?" asked Alyosha,
							
							looking dreamily at him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p65">"To begin with, for the sake of being Russian. Russian
							
							conversations on such subjects are always carried on inconceivably
							
							stupidly. And secondly, the stupider one is, the closer one is to
							
							reality. The stupider one is, the clearer one is. Stupidity is brief
							
							and artless, while intelligence wriggles and hides itself.
							
							Intelligence is a knave, but stupidity is honest and straight forward.
							
							I've led the conversation to my despair, and the more stupidly I
							
							have presented it, the better for me."
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p66">"You will explain why you don't accept the world?" said Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iii_5-p67">"To be sure I will, it's not a secret, that's what I've been
							
							leading up to. Dear little brother, I don't want to corrupt you or
							
							to turn you from your stronghold, perhaps I want to be healed by you."
							
							Ivan smiled suddenly quite like a little gentle child. Alyosha had
							
							never seen such a smile on his face before.</p>					
												
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - Rebellion" prev="iii_5" next="v_4" id="iv_4">

							<p id="iv_4-p1">"I MUST make one confession" Ivan began. "I could never understand
							
							how one can love one's neighbours. It's just one's neighbours, to my
							
							mind, that one can't love, though one might love those at a
							
							distance. I once read somewhere of John the Merciful, a saint, that
							
							when a hungry, frozen beggar came to him, he took him into his bed,
							
							held him in his arms, and began breathing into his mouth, which was
							
							putrid and loathsome from some awful disease. I am convinced that he
							
							did that from 'self-laceration,' from the self-laceration of
							
							falsity, for the sake of the charity imposed by duty, as a penance
							
							laid on him. For anyone to love a man, he must be hidden, for as
							
							soon as he shows his face, love is gone."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p2">"Father Zossima has talked of that more than once," observed
							
							Alyosha; "he, too, said that the face of a man often hinders many
							
							people not practised in love, from loving him. But yet there's a great
							
							deal of love in mankind, and almost Christ-like love. I know that
							
							myself, Ivan."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p3">"Well, I know nothing of it so far, and can't understand it, and
							
							the innumerable mass of mankind are with me there. The question is,
							
							whether that's due to men's bad qualities or whether it's inherent
							
							in their nature. To my thinking, Christ-like love for men is a miracle
							
							impossible on earth. He was God. But we are not gods. Suppose I, for
							
							instance, suffer intensely. Another can never know how much I
							
							suffer, because he is another and not I. And what's more, a man is
							
							rarely ready to admit another's suffering (as though it were a
							
							distinction). Why won't he admit it, do you think? Because I smell
							
							unpleasant, because I have a stupid face, because I once trod on his
							
							foot. Besides, there is suffering and suffering; degrading,
							
							humiliating suffering such as humbles me- hunger, for instance- my
							
							benefactor will perhaps allow me; but when you come to higher
							
							suffering- for an idea, for instance- he will very rarely admit
							
							that, perhaps because my face strikes him as not at all what he
							
							fancies a man should have who suffers for an idea. And so he
							
							deprives me instantly of his favour, and not at all from badness of
							
							heart. Beggars, especially genteel beggars, ought never to show
							
							themselves, but to ask for charity through the newspapers. One can
							
							love one's neighbours in the abstract, or even at a distance, but at
							
							close quarters it's almost impossible. If it were as on the stage,
							
							in the ballet, where if beggars come in, they wear silken rags and
							
							tattered lace and beg for alms dancing gracefully, then one might like
							
							looking at them. But even then we should not love them. But enough
							
							of that. I simply wanted to show you my point of view. I meant to
							
							speak of the suffering of mankind generally, but we had better confine
							
							ourselves to the sufferings of the children. That reduces the scope of
							
							my argument to a tenth of what it would be. Still we'd better keep
							
							to the children, though it does weaken my case. But, in the first
							
							place, children can be loved even at close quarters, even when they
							
							are dirty, even when they are ugly (I fancy, though, children never
							
							are ugly). The second reason why I won't speak of grown-up people is
							
							that, besides being disgusting and unworthy of love, they have a
							
							compensation- they've eaten the apple and know good and evil, and they
							
							have become 'like gods.' They go on eating it still. But the
							
							children haven't eaten anything, and are so far innocent. Are you fond
							
							of children, Alyosha? I know you are, and you will understand why I
							
							prefer to speak of them. If they, too, suffer horribly on earth,
							
							they must suffer for their fathers' sins, they must be punished for
							
							their fathers, who have eaten the apple; but that reasoning is of
							
							the other world and is incomprehensible for the heart of man here on
							
							earth. The innocent must not suffer for another's sins, and especially
							
							such innocents! You may be surprised at me, Alyosha, but I am
							
							awfully fond of children, too. And observe, cruel people, the violent,
							
							the rapacious, the Karamazovs are sometimes very fond of children.
							
							Children while they are quite little- up to seven, for instance- are
							
							so remote from grown-up people they are different creatures, as it
							
							were, of a different species. I knew a criminal in prison who had,
							
							in the course of his career as a burglar, murdered whole families,
							
							including several children. But when he was in prison, he had a
							
							strange affection for them. He spent all his time at his window,
							
							watching the children playing in the prison yard. He trained one
							
							little boy to come up to his window and made great friends with
							
							him.... You don't know why I am telling you all this, Alyosha? My head
							
							aches and I am sad."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p4">"You speak with a strange air," observed Alyosha uneasily, "as
							
							though you were not quite yourself."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p5">"By the way, a Bulgarian I met lately in Moscow," Ivan went on,
							
							seeming not to hear his brother's words, "told me about the crimes
							
							committed by Turks and Circassians in all parts of Bulgaria through
							
							fear of a general rising of the Slavs. They burn villages, murder,
							
							outrage women and children, they nail their prisoners by the ears to
							
							the fences, leave them so till morning, and in the morning they hang
							
							them- all sorts of things you can't imagine. People talk sometimes
							
							of bestial cruelty, but that's a great injustice and insult to the
							
							beasts; a beast can never be so cruel as a man, so artistically cruel.
							
							The tiger only tears and gnaws, that's all he can do. He would never
							
							think of nailing people by the ears, even if he were able to do it.
							
							These Turks took a pleasure in torturing children, -too; cutting the
							
							unborn child from the mothers womb, and tossing babies up in the air
							
							and catching them on the points of their bayonets before their
							
							mothers' eyes. Doing it before the mothers' eyes was what gave zest to
							
							the amusement. Here is another scene that I thought very
							
							interesting. Imagine a trembling mother with her baby in her arms, a
							
							circle of invading Turks around her. They've planned a diversion: they
							
							pet the baby, laugh to make it laugh. They succeed, the baby laughs.
							
							At that moment a Turk points a pistol four inches from the baby's
							
							face. The baby laughs with glee, holds out its little hands to the
							
							pistol, and he pulls the trigger in the baby's face and blows out
							
							its brains. Artistic, wasn't it? By the way, Turks are particularly
							
							fond of sweet things, they say."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p6">"Brother, what are you driving at?" asked Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p7">"I think if the devil doesn't exist, but man has created him, he
							
							has created him in his own image and likeness."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p8">"Just as he did God, then?" observed Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p9">"'It's wonderful how you can turn words,' as Polonius says in
							
							Hamlet," laughed Ivan. "You turn my words against me. Well, I am glad.
							
							Yours must be a fine God, if man created Him in his image and
							
							likeness. You asked just now what I was driving at. You see, I am fond
							
							of collecting certain facts, and, would you believe, I even copy
							
							anecdotes of a certain sort from newspapers and books, and I've
							
							already got a fine collection. The Turks, of course, have gone into
							
							it, but they are foreigners. I have specimens from home that are
							
							even better than the Turks. You know we prefer beating- rods and
							
							scourges- that's our national institution. Nailing ears is unthinkable
							
							for us, for we are, after all, Europeans. But the rod and the
							
							scourge we have always with us and they cannot be taken from us.
							
							Abroad now they scarcely do any beating. Manners are more humane, or
							
							laws have been passed, so that they don't dare to flog men now. But
							
							they make up for it in another way just as national as ours. And so
							
							national that it would be practically impossible among us, though I
							
							believe we are being inoculated with it, since the religious
							
							movement began in our aristocracy. I have a charming pamphlet,
							
							translated from the French, describing how, quite recently, five years
							
							ago, a murderer, Richard, was executed- a young man, I believe, of
							
							three and twenty, who repented and was converted to the Christian
							
							faith at the very scaffold. This Richard was an illegitimate child who
							
							was given as a child of six by his parents to some shepherds on the
							
							Swiss mountains. They brought him up to work for them. He grew up like
							
							a little wild beast among them. The shepherds taught him nothing,
							
							and scarcely fed or clothed him, but sent him out at seven to herd the
							
							flock in cold and wet, and no one hesitated or scrupled to treat him
							
							so. Quite the contrary, they thought they had every right, for Richard
							
							had been given to them as a chattel, and they did not even see the
							
							necessity of feeding him. Richard himself describes how in those
							
							years, like the Prodigal Son in the Gospel, he longed to eat of the
							
							mash given to the pigs, which were fattened for sale. But they
							
							wouldn't even give that, and beat him when he stole from the pigs. And
							
							that was how he spent all his childhood and his youth, till he grew up
							
							and was strong enough to go away and be a thief. The savage began to
							
							earn his living as a day labourer in Geneva. He drank what he
							
							earned, he lived like a brute, and finished by killing and robbing
							
							an old man. He was caught, tried, and condemned to death. They are not
							
							sentimentalists there. And in prison he was immediately surrounded
							
							by pastors, members of Christian brotherhoods, philanthropic ladies,
							
							and the like. They taught him to read and write in prison, and
							
							expounded the Gospel to him. They exhorted him, worked upon him,
							
							drummed at him incessantly, till at last he solemnly confessed his
							
							crime. He was converted. He wrote to the court himself that he was a
							
							monster, but that in the end God had vouchsafed him light and shown
							
							grace. All Geneva was in excitement about him- all philanthropic and
							
							religious Geneva. All the aristocratic and well-bred society of the
							
							town rushed to the prison, kissed Richard and embraced him; 'You are
							
							our brother, you have found grace.' And Richard does nothing but
							
							weep with emotion, 'Yes, I've found grace! All my youth and
							
							childhood I was glad of pigs' food, but now even I have found grace. I
							
							am dying in the Lord.' 'Yes, Richard, die in the Lord; you have shed
							
							blood and must die. Though it's not your fault that you knew not the
							
							Lord, when you coveted the pigs' food and were beaten for stealing
							
							it (which was very wrong of you, for stealing is forbidden); but
							
							you've shed blood and you must die.'And on the last day, Richard,
							
							perfectly limp, did nothing but cry and repeat every minute: 'This
							
							is my happiest day. I am going to the Lord.' 'Yes,' cry the pastors
							
							and the judges and philanthropic ladies. 'This is the happiest day
							
							of your life, for you are going to the Lord!' They all walk or drive
							
							to the scaffold in procession behind the prison van. At the scaffold
							
							they call to Richard: 'Die, brother, die in the Lord, for even thou
							
							hast found grace!' And so, covered with his brothers' kisses,
							
							Richard is dragged on to the scaffold, and led to the guillotine.
							
							And they chopped off his head in brotherly fashion, because he had
							
							found grace. Yes, that's characteristic. That pamphlet is translated
							
							into Russian by some Russian philanthropists of aristocratic rank
							
							and evangelical aspirations, and has been distributed gratis for the
							
							enlightenment of the people. The case of Richard is interesting
							
							because it's national. Though to us it's absurd to cut off a man's
							
							head, because he has become our brother and has found grace, yet we
							
							have our own speciality, which is all but worse. Our historical
							
							pastime is the direct satisfaction of inflicting pain. There are lines
							
							in Nekrassov describing how a peasant lashes a horse on the eyes,
							
							'on its meek eyes,' everyone must have seen it. It's peculiarly
							
							Russian. He describes how a feeble little nag has foundered under
							
							too heavy a load and cannot move. The peasant beats it, beats it
							
							savagely, beats it at last not knowing what he is doing in the
							
							intoxication of cruelty, thrashes it mercilessly over and over
							
							again. 'However weak you are, you must pull, if you die for it.' The
							
							nag strains, and then he begins lashing the poor defenceless
							
							creature on its weeping, on its 'meek eyes.' The frantic beast tugs
							
							and draws the load, trembling all over, gasping for breath, moving
							
							sideways, with a sort of unnatural spasmodic action- it's awful in
							
							Nekrassov. But that only a horse, and God has horses to be beaten.
							
							So the Tatars have taught us, and they left us the knout as a
							
							remembrance of it. But men, too, can be beaten. A well-educated,
							
							cultured gentleman and his wife beat their own child with a birch-rod,
							
							a girl of seven. I have an exact account of it. The papa was glad that
							
							the birch was covered with twigs. 'It stings more,' said he, and so be
							
							began stinging his daughter. I know for a fact there are people who at
							
							every blow are worked up to sensuality, to literal sensuality, which
							
							increases progressively at every blow they inflict. They beat for a
							
							minute, for five minutes, for ten minutes, more often and more
							
							savagely. The child screams. At last the child cannot scream, it
							
							gasps, 'Daddy daddy!' By some diabolical unseemly chance the case
							
							was brought into court. A counsel is engaged. The Russian people
							
							have long called a barrister 'a conscience for hire.' The counsel
							
							protests in his client's defence. 'It's such a simple thing,' he says,
							
							'an everyday domestic event. A father corrects his child. To our shame
							
							be it said, it is brought into court.' The jury, convinced by him,
							
							give a favourable verdict. The public roars with delight that the
							
							torturer is acquitted. Ah, pity I wasn't there! I would have
							
							proposed to raise a subscription in his honour! Charming pictures.
							
								"But I've still better things about children. I've collected a
							
							great, great deal about Russian children, Alyosha. There was a
							
							little girl of five who was hated by her father and mother, 'most
							
							worthy and respectable people, of good education and breeding.' You
							
							see, I must repeat again, it is a peculiar characteristic of many
							
							people, this love of torturing children, and children only. To all
							
							other types of humanity these torturers behave mildly and
							
							benevolently, like cultivated and humane Europeans; but they are
							
							very fond of tormenting children, even fond of children themselves
							
							in that sense. it's just their defencelessness that tempts the
							
							tormentor, just the angelic confidence of the child who has no
							
							refuge and no appeal, that sets his vile blood on fire. In every
							
							man, of course, a demon lies hidden- the demon of rage, the demon of
							
							lustful heat at the screams of the tortured victim, the demon of
							
							lawlessness let off the chain, the demon of diseases that follow on
							
							vice, gout, kidney disease, and so on.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p10">"This poor child of five was subjected to every possible torture
							
							by those cultivated parents. They beat her, thrashed her, kicked her
							
							for no reason till her body was one bruise. Then, they went to greater
							
							refinements of cruelty- shut her up all night in the cold and frost in
							
							a privy, and because she didn't ask to be taken up at night (as though
							
							a child of five sleeping its angelic, sound sleep could be trained
							
							to wake and ask), they smeared her face and filled her mouth with
							
							excrement, and it was her mother, her mother did this. And that mother
							
							could sleep, hearing the poor child's groans! Can you understand why a
							
							little creature, who can't even understand what's done to her,
							
							should beat her little aching heart with her tiny fist in the dark and
							
							the cold, and weep her meek unresentful tears to dear, kind God to
							
							protect her? Do you understand that, friend and brother, you pious and
							
							humble novice? Do you understand why this infamy must be and is
							
							permitted? Without it, I am told, man could not have existed on earth,
							
							for he could not have known good and evil. Why should he know that
							
							diabolical good and evil when it costs so much? Why, the whole world
							
							of knowledge is not worth that child's prayer to dear, kind God'! I
							
							say nothing of the sufferings of grown-up people, they have eaten
							
							the apple, damn them, and the devil take them all! But these little
							
							ones! I am making you suffer, Alyosha, you are not yourself. I'll
							
							leave off if you like."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p11">"Nevermind. I want to suffer too," muttered Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p12">"One picture, only one more, because it's so curious, so
							
							characteristic, and I have only just read it in some collection of
							
							Russian antiquities. I've forgotten the name. I must look it up. It
							
							was in the darkest days of serfdom at the beginning of the century,
							
							and long live the Liberator of the People! There was in those days a
							
							general of aristocratic connections, the owner of great estates, one
							
							of those men- somewhat exceptional, I believe, even then- who,
							
							retiring from the service into a life of leisure, are convinced that
							
							they've earned absolute power over the lives of their subjects.
							
							There were such men then. So our general, settled on his property of
							
							two thousand souls, lives in pomp, and domineers over his poor
							
							neighbours as though they were dependents and buffoons. He has kennels
							
							of hundreds of hounds and nearly a hundred dog-boys- all mounted,
							
							and in uniform. One day a serf-boy, a little child of eight, threw a
							
							stone in play and hurt the paw of the general's favourite hound.
							
							'Why is my favourite dog lame?' He is told that the boy threw a
							
							stone that hurt the dog's paw. 'So you did it.' The general looked the
							
							child up and down. 'Take him.' He was taken- taken from his mother and
							
							kept shut up all night. Early that morning the general comes out on
							
							horseback, with the hounds, his dependents, dog-boys, and huntsmen,
							
							all mounted around him in full hunting parade. The servants are
							
							summoned for their edification, and in front of them all stands the
							
							mother of the child. The child is brought from the lock-up. It's a
							
							gloomy, cold, foggy, autumn day, a capital day for hunting. The
							
							general orders the child to be undressed; the child is stripped naked.
							
							He shivers, numb with terror, not daring to cry.... 'Make him run,'
							
							commands the general. 'Run! run!' shout the dog-boys. The boy runs....
							
							'At him!' yells the general, and he sets the whole pack of hounds on
							
							the child. The hounds catch him, and tear him to pieces before his
							
							mother's eyes!... I believe the general was afterwards declared
							
							incapable of administering his estates. Well- what did he deserve?
							
							To be shot? To be shot for the satisfaction of our moral feelings?
							
							Speak, Alyosha!
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p13">"To be shot," murmured Alyosha, lifting his eyes to Ivan with a
							
							pale, twisted smile.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p14">"Bravo!" cried Ivan delighted. "If even you say so... You're a
							
							pretty monk! So there is a little devil sitting in your heart, Alyosha
							
							Karamazov!"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p15">"What I said was absurd, but-"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p16">"That's just the point, that 'but'!" cried Ivan. "Let me tell you,
							
							novice, that the absurd is only too necessary on earth. The world
							
							stands on absurdities, and perhaps nothing would have come to pass
							
							in it without them. We know what we know!"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p17">"What do you know?"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p18">"I understand nothing," Ivan went on, as though in delirium. "I
							
							don't want to understand anything now. I want to stick to the fact.
							
							I made up my mind long ago not to understand. If I try to understand
							
							anything, I shall be false to the fact, and I have determined to stick
							
							to the fact."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p19">"Why are you trying me?" Alyosha cried, with sudden distress.
							
							"Will you say what you mean at last?"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p20">"Of course, I will; that's what I've been leading up to. You are
							
							dear to me, I don't want to let you go, and I won't give you up to
							
							your Zossima."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p21">Ivan for a minute was silent, his face became all at once very
							
							sad.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p22">"Listen! I took the case of children only to make my case clearer.
							
							Of the other tears of humanity with which the earth is soaked from its
							
							crust to its centre, I will say nothing. I have narrowed my subject on
							
							purpose. I am a bug, and I recognise in all humility that I cannot
							
							understand why the world is arranged as it is. Men are themselves to
							
							blame, I suppose; they were given paradise, they wanted freedom, and
							
							stole fire from heaven, though they knew they would become unhappy, so
							
							there is no need to pity them. With my pitiful, earthly, Euclidian
							
							understanding, all I know is that there is suffering and that there
							
							are none guilty; that cause follows effect, simply and directly;
							
							that everything flows and finds its level- but that's only Euclidian
							
							nonsense, I know that, and I can't consent to live by it! What comfort
							
							is it to me that there are none guilty and that cause follows effect
							
							simply and directly, and that I know it?- I must have justice, or I
							
							will destroy myself. And not justice in some remote infinite time
							
							and space, but here on earth, and that I could see myself. I have
							
							believed in it. I want to see it, and if I am dead by then, let me
							
							rise again, for if it all happens without me, it will be too unfair.
							
							Surely I haven't suffered simply that I, my crimes and my
							
							sufferings, may manure the soil of the future harmony for somebody
							
							else. I want to see with my own eyes the hind lie down with the lion
							
							and the victim rise up and embrace his murderer. I want to be there
							
							when everyone suddenly understands what it has all been for. All the
							
							religions of the world are built on this longing, and I am a believer.
							
							But then there are the children, and what am I to do about them?
							
							That's a question I can't answer. For the hundredth time I repeat,
							
							there are numbers of questions, but I've only taken the children,
							
							because in their case what I mean is so unanswerably clear. Listen! If
							
							all must suffer to pay for the eternal harmony, what have children
							
							to do with it, tell me, please? It's beyond all comprehension why they
							
							should suffer, and why they should pay for the harmony. Why should
							
							they, too, furnish material to enrich the soil for the harmony of
							
							the future? I understand solidarity in sin among men. I understand
							
							solidarity in retribution, too; but there can be no such solidarity
							
							with children. And if it is really true that they must share
							
							responsibility for all their fathers' crimes, such a truth is not of
							
							this world and is beyond my comprehension. Some jester will say,
							
							perhaps, that the child would have grown up and have sinned, but you
							
							see he didn't grow up, he was torn to pieces by the dogs, at eight
							
							years old. Oh, Alyosha, I am not blaspheming! I understand, of course,
							
							what an upheaval of the universe it will be when everything in
							
							heaven and earth blends in one hymn of praise and everything that
							
							lives and has lived cries aloud: 'Thou art just, O Lord, for Thy
							
							ways are revealed.' When the mother embraces the fiend who threw her
							
							child to the dogs, and all three cry aloud with tears, 'Thou art just,
							
							O Lord!' then, of course, the crown of knowledge will be reached and
							
							all will be made clear. But what pulls me up here is that I can't
							
							accept that harmony. And while I am on earth, I make haste to take
							
							my own measures. You see, Alyosha, perhaps it really may happen that
							
							if I live to that moment, or rise again to see it, I, too, perhaps,
							
							may cry aloud with the rest, looking at the mother embracing the
							
							child's torturer, 'Thou art just, O Lord!' but I don't want to cry
							
							aloud then. While there is still time, I hasten to protect myself, and
							
							so I renounce the higher harmony altogether. It's not worth the
							
							tears of that one tortured child who beat itself on the breast with
							
							its little fist and prayed in its stinking outhouse, with its
							
							unexpiated tears to 'dear, kind God'! It's not worth it, because those
							
							tears are unatoned for. They must be atoned for, or there can be no
							
							harmony. But how? How are you going to atone for them? Is it possible?
							
							By their being avenged? But what do I care for avenging them? What
							
							do I care for a hell for oppressors? What good can hell do, since
							
							those children have already been tortured? And what becomes of
							
							harmony, if there is hell? I want to forgive. I want to embrace. I
							
							don't want more suffering. And if the sufferings of children go to
							
							swell the sum of sufferings which was necessary to pay for truth, then
							
							I protest that the truth is not worth such a price. I don't want the
							
							mother to embrace the oppressor who threw her son to the dogs! She
							
							dare not forgive him! Let her forgive him for herself, if she will,
							
							let her forgive the torturer for the immeasurable suffering of her
							
							mother's heart. But the sufferings of her tortured child she has no
							
							right to forgive; she dare not forgive the torturer, even if the child
							
							were to forgive him! And if that is so, if they dare not forgive, what
							
							becomes of harmony? Is there in the whole world a being who would have
							
							the right to forgive and could forgive? I don't want harmony. From
							
							love for humanity I don't want it. I would rather be left with the
							
							unavenged suffering. I would rather remain with my unavenged suffering
							
							and unsatisfied indignation, even if I were wrong. Besides, too high a
							
							price is asked for harmony; it's beyond our means to pay so much to
							
							enter on it. And so I hasten to give back my entrance ticket, and if I
							
							am an honest man I am bound to give it back as soon as possible. And
							
							that I am doing. It's not God that I don't accept, Alyosha, only I
							
							most respectfully return him the ticket."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p23">"That's rebellion," murmered Alyosha, looking down.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p24">"Rebellion? I am sorry you call it that," said Ivan earnestly.
							
							"One can hardly live in rebellion, and I want to live. Tell me
							
							yourself, I challenge your answer. Imagine that you are creating a
							
							fabric of human destiny with the object of making men happy in the
							
							end, giving them peace and rest at last, but that it was essential and
							
							inevitable to torture to death only one tiny creature- that baby
							
							beating its breast with its fist, for instance- and to found that
							
							edifice on its unavenged tears, would you consent to be the
							
							architect on those conditions? Tell me, and tell the truth."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p25">"No, I wouldn't consent," said Alyosha softly.
							
								"And can you admit the idea that men for whom you are building
							
							it would agree to accept their happiness on the foundation of the
							
							unexpiated blood of a little victim? And accepting it would remain
							
							happy for ever?"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p26">"No, I can't admit it. Brother," said Alyosha suddenly, with
							
							flashing eyes, "you said just now, is there a being in the whole world
							
							who would have the right to forgive and could forgive? But there is
							
							a Being and He can forgive everything, all and for all, because He
							
							gave His innocent blood for all and everything. You have forgotten
							
							Him, and on Him is built the edifice, and it is to Him they cry aloud,
							
							'Thou art just, O Lord, for Thy ways are revealed!'
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p27">"Ah! the One without sin and His blood! No, I have not forgotten
							
							Him; on the contrary I've been wondering all the time how it was you
							
							did not bring Him in before, for usually all arguments on your side
							
							put Him in the foreground. Do you know, Alyosha- don't laugh I made
							
							a poem about a year ago. If you can waste another ten minutes on me,
							
							I'll tell it to you."
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p28">"You wrote a poem?"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p29">"Oh, no, I didn't write it," laughed Ivan, and I've never
							
							written two lines of poetry in my life. But I made up this poem in
							
							prose and I remembered it. I was carried away when I made it up. You
							
							will be my first reader- that is listener. Why should an author forego
							
							even one listener?" smiled Ivan. "Shall I tell it to you?"
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p30">"I am all attention." said Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iv_4-p31">"My poem is called The Grand Inquisitor; it's a ridiculous
							
							thing, but I want to tell it to you.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - The Grand Inquisitor" prev="iv_4" next="vi_3" id="v_4">
					
							<p id="v_4-p1">"EVEN this must have a preface--that is, a literary preface,"
							
							laughed Ivan, "and I am a poor hand at making one. You see, my
							
							action takes place in the sixteenth century, and at that time, as
							
							you probably learnt at school, it was customary in poetry to bring
							
							down heavenly powers on earth. Not to speak of Dante, in France,
							
							clerks, as well as the monks in the monasteries, used to give
							
							regular performances in which the Madonna, the saints, the angels,
							
							Christ, and God Himself were brought on the stage. In those days it
							
							was done in all simplicity. In Victor Hugo's Notre Dame de Paris an
							
							edifying and gratuitous spectacle was provided for the people in the
							
							Hotel de Ville of Paris in the reign of Louis XI in honour of the
							
							birth of the dauphin. It was called Le bon jugement de la tres
							
							sainte et gracieuse Vierge Marie, and she appears herself on the stage
							
							and pronounces her bon jugement. Similar plays, chiefly from the Old
							
							Testament, were occasionally performed in Moscow too, up to the
							
							times of Peter the Great. But besides plays there were all sorts of
							
							legends and ballads scattered about the world, in which the saints and
							
							angels and all the powers of Heaven took part when required. In our
							
							monasteries the monks busied themselves in translating, copying, and
							
							even composing such poems--and even under the Tatars. There is, for
							
							instance, one such poem (of course, from the Greek), The Wanderings of
							
							Our Lady through Hell, with descriptions as bold as Dante's. Our
							
							Lady visits hell, and the Archangel Michael leads her through the
							
							torments. She sees the sinners and their punishment. There she sees
							
							among others one noteworthy set of sinners in a burning lake; some
							
							of them sink to the bottom of the lake so that they can't swim out,
							
							and 'these God forgets'--an expression of extraordinary depth and
							
							force. And so Our Lady, shocked and weeping, falls before the throne
							
							of God and begs for mercy for all in hell--for all she has seen there,
							
							indiscriminately. Her conversation with God is immensely
							
							interesting. She beseeches Him, she will not desist, and when God
							
							points to the hands and feet of her Son, nailed to the Cross, and
							
							asks, 'How can I forgive His tormentors?' she bids all the saints, all
							
							the martyrs, all the angels and archangels to fall down with her and
							
							pray for mercy on all without distinction. It ends by her winning from
							
							God a respite of suffering every year from Good Friday till Trinity
							
							Day, and the sinners at once raise a cry of thankfulness from hell,
							
							chanting, 'Thou art just, O Lord, in this judgment.' Well, my poem
							
							would have been of that kind if it had appeared at that time. He comes
							
							on the scene in my poem, but He says nothing, only appears and
							
							passes on. Fifteen centuries have passed since He promised to come
							
							in His glory, fifteen centuries since His prophet wrote, 'Behold, I
							
							come quickly'; 'Of that day and that hour knoweth no man, neither
							
							the Son, but the Father,' as He Himself predicted on earth. But
							
							humanity awaits him with the same faith and with the same love. Oh,
							
							with greater faith, for it is fifteen centuries since man has ceased
							
							to see signs from heaven.</p><p id="v_4-p2" /><p id="v_4-p3" />
							
							
							
											   <p class="center" id="v_4-p4">No signs from heaven come to-day</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="v_4-p5">To add to what the heart doth say.</p><p id="v_4-p6" /><p id="v_4-p7" /><p id="v_4-p8">
							
							
							
								There was nothing left but faith in what the heart doth say. It is
							
							true there were many miracles in those days. There were saints who
							
							performed miraculous cures; some holy people, according to their
							
							biographies, were visited by the Queen of Heaven herself. But the
							
							devil did not slumber, and doubts were already arising among men of
							
							the truth of these miracles. And just then there appeared in the north
							
							of Germany a terrible new heresy. 'A huge star like to a torch'
							
							(that is, to a church) 'fell on the sources of the waters and they
							
							became bitter.' These heretics began blasphemously denying miracles.
							
							But those who remained faithful were all the more ardent in their
							
							faith. The tears of humanity rose up to Him as before, awaited His
							
							coming, loved Him, hoped for Him, yearned to suffer and die for Him as
							
							before. And so many ages mankind had prayed with faith and fervour, 'O
							
							Lord our God, hasten Thy coming'; so many ages called upon Him, that
							
							in His infinite mercy He deigned to come down to His servants.
							
							Before that day He had come down, He had visited some holy men,
							
							martyrs, and hermits, as is written in their lives. Among us,
							
							Tyutchev, with absolute faith in the truth of his words, bore
							
							witness that</p><p id="v_4-p9" /><p id="v_4-p10" />
							
							
							
											   <p class="center" id="v_4-p11">Bearing the Cross, in slavish dress,</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="v_4-p12">Weary and worn, the Heavenly King</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="v_4-p13">Our mother, Russia, came to bless,</p>
							
											   <p class="center" id="v_4-p14">And through our land went wandering.</p>
							
							
							
							<p id="v_4-p15">And that certainly was so, I assure you.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p16">"And behold, He deigned to appear for a moment to the people, to
							
							the tortured, suffering people, sunk in iniquity, but loving Him
							
							like children. My story is laid in Spain, in Seville, in the most
							
							terrible time of the Inquisition, when fires were lighted every day to
							
							the glory of God, and 'in the splendid auto da fe the wicked
							
							heretics were burnt.' Oh, of course, this was not the coming in
							
							which He will appear, according to His promise, at the end of time
							
							in all His heavenly glory, and which will be sudden 'as lightning
							
							flashing from east to west.' No, He visited His children only for a
							
							moment, and there where the flames were crackling round the
							
							heretics. In His infinite mercy He came once more among men in that
							
							human shape in which He walked among men for thirty-three years
							
							fifteen centuries ago. He came down to the 'hot pavements' of the
							
							southern town in which on the day before almost a hundred heretics
							
							had, ad majorem gloriam Dei, been burnt by the cardinal, the Grand
							
							Inquisitor, in a magnificent auto da fe, in the presence of the
							
							king, the court, the knights, the cardinals, the most charming
							
							ladies of the court, and the whole population of Seville.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p17">"He came softly, unobserved, and yet, strange to say, everyone
							
							recognised Him. That might be one of the best passages in the poem.
							
							I mean, why they recognised Him. The people are irresistibly drawn
							
							to Him, they surround Him, they flock about Him, follow Him. He
							
							moves silently in their midst with a gentle smile of infinite
							
							compassion. The sun of love burns in His heart, and power shine from
							
							His eyes, and their radiance, shed on the people, stirs their hearts
							
							with responsive love. He holds out His hands to them, blesses them,
							
							and a healing virtue comes from contact with Him, even with His
							
							garments. An old man in the crowd, blind from childhood, cries out, 'O
							
							Lord, heal me and I shall see Thee!' and, as it were, scales fall from
							
							his eyes and the blind man sees Him. The crowd weeps and kisses the
							
							earth under His feet. Children throw flowers before Him, sing, and cry
							
							hosannah. 'It is He--it is He!' repeat. 'It must be He, it can be no
							
							one but Him!' He stops at the steps of the Seville cathedral at the
							
							moment when the weeping mourners are bringing in a little open white
							
							coffin. In it lies a child of seven, the only daughter of a
							
							prominent citizen. The dead child lies hidden in flowers. 'He will
							
							raise your child,' the crowd shouts to the weeping mother. The priest,
							
							coming to meet the coffin, looks perplexed, and frowns, but the mother
							
							of the dead child throws herself at His feet with a wail. 'If it is
							
							Thou, raise my child!' she cries, holding out her hands to Him. The
							
							procession halts, the coffin is laid on the steps at His feet. He
							
							looks with compassion, and His lips once more softly pronounce,
							
							'Maiden, arise!' and the maiden arises. The little girl sits up in the
							
							coffin and looks round, smiling with wide-open wondering eyes, holding
							
							a bunch of white roses they had put in her hand.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p18">"There are cries, sobs, confusion among the people, and at that
							
							moment the cardinal himself, the Grand Inquisitor, passes by the
							
							cathedral. He is an old man, almost ninety, tall and erect, with a
							
							withered face and sunken eyes, in which there is still a gleam of
							
							light. He is not dressed in his gorgeous cardinal's robes, as he was
							
							the day before, when he was burning the enemies of the Roman Church-
							
							at this moment he is wearing his coarse, old, monk's cassock. At a
							
							distance behind him come his gloomy assistants and slaves and the
							
							'holy guard.' He stops at the sight of the crowd and watches it from a
							
							distance. He sees everything; he sees them set the coffin down at
							
							His feet, sees the child rise up, and his face darkens. He knits his
							
							thick grey brows and his eyes gleam with a sinister fire. He holds out
							
							his finger and bids the guards take Him. And such is his power, so
							
							completely are the people cowed into submission and trembling
							
							obedience to him, that the crowd immediately makes way for the guards,
							
							and in the midst of deathlike silence they lay hands on Him and lead
							
							him away. The crowd instantly bows down to the earth, like one man,
							
							before the old Inquisitor. He blesses the people in silence and passes
							
							on' The guards lead their prisoner to the close, gloomy vaulted
							
							prison--in the ancient palace of the Holy, inquisition and shut him in
							
							it. The day passes and is followed by the dark, burning,
							
							'breathless' night of Seville. The air is 'fragrant with laurel and
							
							lemon.' In the pitch darkness the iron door of the prison is
							
							suddenly opened and the Grand Inquisitor himself comes in with a light
							
							in his hand. He is alone; the door is closed at once behind him. He
							
							stands in the doorway and for a minute or two gazes into His face.
							
							At last he goes up slowly, sets the light on the table and speaks.
							
								"'Is it Thou? Thou?' but receiving no answer, he adds at once.
							
							'Don't answer, be silent. What canst Thou say, indeed? I know too well
							
							what Thou wouldst say. And Thou hast no right to add anything to
							
							what Thou hadst said of old. Why, then, art Thou come to hinder us?
							
							For Thou hast come to hinder us, and Thou knowest that. But dost
							
							thou know what will be to-morrow? I know not who Thou art and care not
							
							to know whether it is Thou or only a semblance of Him, but to-morrow I
							
							shall condemn Thee and burn Thee at the stake as the worst of
							
							heretics. And the very people who have to-day kissed Thy feet,
							
							to-morrow at the faintest sign from me will rush to heap up the embers
							
							of Thy fire. Knowest Thou that? Yes, maybe Thou knowest it,' he
							
							added with thoughtful penetration, never for a moment taking his
							
							eyes off the Prisoner."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p19">"I don't quite understand, Ivan. What does it mean?" Alyosha,
							
							who had been listening in silence, said with a smile. "Is it simply
							
							a wild fantasy, or a mistake on the part of the old man--some
							
							impossible quid pro quo?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p20">"Take it as the last," said Ivan, laughing, "if you are so
							
							corrupted by modern realism and can't stand anything fantastic. If you
							
							like it to be a case of mistaken identity, let it be so. It is
							
							true," he went on, laughing, "the old man was ninety, and he might
							
							well be crazy over his set idea. He might have been struck by the
							
							appearance of the Prisoner. It might, in fact, be simply his
							
							ravings, the delusion of an old man of ninety, over-excited by the
							
							auto da fe of a hundred heretics the day before. But does it matter to
							
							us after all whether it was a mistake of identity or a wild fantasy?
							
							All that matters is that the old man should speak out, that he
							
							should speak openly of what he has thought in silence for ninety
							
							years."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p21">"And the Prisoner too is silent? Does He look at him and not say a
							
							word?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p22">"That's inevitable in any case," Ivan laughed again. "The old
							
							man has told Him He hasn't the right to add anything to what He has
							
							said of old. One may say it is the most fundamental feature of Roman
							
							Catholicism, in my opinion at least. 'All has been given by Thee to
							
							the Pope,' they say, 'and all, therefore, is still in the Pope's
							
							hands, and there is no need for Thee to come now at all. Thou must not
							
							meddle for the time, at least.' That's how they speak and write too-
							
							the Jesuits, at any rate. I have read it myself in the works of
							
							their theologians. 'Hast Thou the right to reveal to us one of the
							
							mysteries of that world from which Thou hast come?' my old man asks
							
							Him, and answers the question for Him. 'No, Thou hast not; that Thou
							
							mayest not add to what has been said of old, and mayest not take
							
							from men the freedom which Thou didst exalt when Thou wast on earth.
							
							Whatsoever Thou revealest anew will encroach on men's freedom of
							
							faith; for it will be manifest as a miracle, and the freedom of
							
							their faith was dearer to Thee than anything in those days fifteen
							
							hundred years ago. Didst Thou not often say then, "I will make you
							
							free"? But now Thou hast seen these "free" men,' the old man adds
							
							suddenly, with a pensive smile. 'Yes, we've paid dearly for it,' he
							
							goes on, looking sternly at Him, 'but at last we have completed that
							
							work in Thy name. For fifteen centuries we have been wrestling with
							
							Thy freedom, but now it is ended and over for good. Dost Thou not
							
							believe that it's over for good? Thou lookest meekly at me and
							
							deignest not even to be wroth with me. But let me tell Thee that
							
							now, to-day, people are more persuaded than ever that they have
							
							perfect freedom, yet they have brought their freedom to us and laid it
							
							humbly at our feet. But that has been our doing. Was this what Thou
							
							didst? Was this Thy freedom?'"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p23">"I don't understand again." Alyosha broke in. "Is he ironical,
							
							is he jesting?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p24">"Not a bit of it! He claims it as a merit for himself and his
							
							Church that at last they have vanquished freedom and have done so to
							
							make men happy. 'For now' (he is speaking of the Inquisition, of
							
							course) 'for the first time it has become possible to think of the
							
							happiness of men. Man was created a rebel; and how can rebels be
							
							happy? Thou wast warned,' he says to Him. 'Thou hast had no lack of
							
							admonitions and warnings, but Thou didst not listen to those warnings;
							
							Thou didst reject the only way by which men might be made happy.
							
							But, fortunately, departing Thou didst hand on the work to us. Thou
							
							hast promised, Thou hast established by Thy word, Thou hast given to
							
							us the right to bind and to unbind, and now, of course, Thou canst not
							
							think of taking it away. Why, then, hast Thou come to hinder us?'"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p25">"And what's the meaning of 'no lack of admonitions and warnings'?"
							
							asked Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p26">"Why, that's the chief part of what the old man must say.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p27">"'The wise and dread spirit, the spirit of self-destruction and
							
							non-existence,' the old man goes on, great spirit talked with Thee
							
							in the wilderness, and we are told in the books that he "tempted"
							
							Thee. Is that so? And could anything truer be said than what he
							
							revealed to Thee in three questions and what Thou didst reject, and
							
							what in the books is called "the temptation"? And yet if there has
							
							ever been on earth a real stupendous miracle, it took place on that
							
							day, on the day of the three temptations. The statement of those three
							
							questions was itself the miracle. If it were possible to imagine
							
							simply for the sake of argument that those three questions of the
							
							dread spirit had perished utterly from the books, and that we had to
							
							restore them and to invent them anew, and to do so had gathered
							
							together all the wise men of the earth--rulers, chief priests, learned
							
							men, philosophers, poets--and had set them the task to invent three
							
							questions, such as would not only fit the occasion, but express in
							
							three words, three human phrases, the whole future history of the
							
							world and of humanity--dost Thou believe that all the wisdom of the
							
							earth united could have invented anything in depth and force equal
							
							to the three questions which were actually put to Thee then by the
							
							wise and mighty spirit in the wilderness? From those questions
							
							alone, from the miracle of their statement, we can see that we have
							
							here to do not with the fleeting human intelligence, but with the
							
							absolute and eternal. For in those three questions the whole
							
							subsequent history of mankind is, as it were, brought together into
							
							one whole, and foretold, and in them are united all the unsolved
							
							historical contradictions of human nature. At the time it could not be
							
							so clear, since the future was unknown; but now that fifteen hundred
							
							years have passed, we see that everything in those three questions was
							
							so justly divined and foretold, and has been so truly fulfilled,
							
							that nothing can be added to them or taken from them.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p28">"Judge Thyself who was right--Thou or he who questioned Thee then?
							
							Remember the first question; its meaning, in other words, was this:
							
							"Thou wouldst go into the world, and art going with empty hands,
							
							with some promise of freedom which men in their simplicity and their
							
							natural unruliness cannot even understand, which they fear and
							
							dread--for nothing has ever been more insupportable for a man and a
							
							human society than freedom. But seest Thou these stones in this
							
							parched and barren wilderness? Turn them into bread, and mankind
							
							will run after Thee like a flock of sheep, grateful and obedient,
							
							though for ever trembling, lest Thou withdraw Thy hand and deny them
							
							Thy bread." But Thou wouldst not deprive man of freedom and didst
							
							reject the offer, thinking, what is that freedom worth if obedience is
							
							bought with bread? Thou didst reply that man lives not by bread alone.
							
							But dost Thou know that for the sake of that earthly bread the
							
							spirit of the earth will rise up against Thee and will strive with
							
							Thee and overcome Thee, and all will follow him, crying, "Who can
							
							compare with this beast? He has given us fire from heaven!" Dost
							
							Thou know that the ages will pass, and humanity will proclaim by the
							
							lips of their sages that there is no crime, and therefore no sin;
							
							there is only hunger? "Feed men, and then ask of them virtue!"
							
							that's what they'll write on the banner, which they will raise against
							
							Thee, and with which they will destroy Thy temple. Where Thy temple
							
							stood will rise a new building; the terrible tower of Babel will be
							
							built again, and though, like the one of old, it will not be finished,
							
							yet Thou mightest have prevented that new tower and have cut short the
							
							sufferings of men for a thousand years; for they will come back to
							
							us after a thousand years of agony with their tower. They will seek us
							
							again, hidden underground in the catacombs, for we shall be again
							
							persecuted and tortured. They will find us and cry to us, "Feed us,
							
							for those who have promised us fire from heaven haven't given it!" And
							
							then we shall finish building their tower, for he finishes the
							
							building who feeds them. And we alone shall feed them in Thy name,
							
							declaring falsely that it is in Thy name. Oh, never, never can they
							
							feed themselves without us! No science will give them bread so long as
							
							they remain free. In the end they will lay their freedom at our
							
							feet, and say to us, "Make us your slaves, but feed us." They will
							
							understand themselves, at last, that freedom and bread enough for
							
							all are inconceivable together, for never, never will they be able
							
							to share between them! They will be convinced, too, that they can
							
							never be free, for they are weak, vicious, worthless, and
							
							rebellious. Thou didst promise them the bread of Heaven, but, I repeat
							
							again, can it compare with earthly bread in the eyes of the weak, ever
							
							sinful and ignoble race of man? And if for the sake of the bread of
							
							Heaven thousands shall follow Thee, what is to become of the
							
							millions and tens of thousands of millions of creatures who will not
							
							have the strength to forego the earthly bread for the sake of the
							
							heavenly? Or dost Thou care only for the tens of thousands of the
							
							great and strong, while the millions, numerous as the sands of the
							
							sea, who are weak but love Thee, must exist only for the sake of the
							
							great and strong? No, we care for the weak too. They are sinful and
							
							rebellious, but in the end they too will become obedient. They will
							
							marvel at us and look on us as gods, because we are ready to endure
							
							the freedom which they have found so dreadful and to rule over them-
							
							so awful it will seem to them to be free. But we shall tell them
							
							that we are Thy servants and rule them in Thy name. We shall deceive
							
							them again, for we will not let Thee come to us again. That
							
							deception will be our suffering, for we shall be forced to lie.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p29">"'This is the significance of the first question in the
							
							wilderness, and this is what Thou hast rejected for the sake of that
							
							freedom which Thou hast exalted above everything. Yet in this question
							
							lies hid the great secret of this world. Choosing "bread," Thou
							
							wouldst have satisfied the universal and everlasting craving of
							
							humanity--to find someone to worship. So long as man remains free he
							
							strives for nothing so incessantly and so painfully as to find someone
							
							to worship. But man seeks to worship what is established beyond
							
							dispute, so that all men would agree at once to worship it. For
							
							these pitiful creatures are concerned not only to find what one or the
							
							other can worship, but to find community of worship is the chief
							
							misery of every man individually and of all humanity from the
							
							beginning of time. For the sake of common worship they've slain each
							
							other with the sword. They have set up gods and challenged one
							
							another, "Put away your gods and come and worship ours, or we will
							
							kill you and your gods!" And so it will be to the end of the world,
							
							even when gods disappear from the earth; they will fall down before
							
							idols just the same. Thou didst know, Thou couldst not but have known,
							
							this fundamental secret of human nature, but Thou didst reject the one
							
							infallible banner which was offered Thee to make all men bow down to
							
							Thee alone--the banner of earthly bread; and Thou hast rejected it for
							
							the sake of freedom and the bread of Heaven. Behold what Thou didst
							
							further. And all again in the name of freedom! I tell Thee that man is
							
							tormented by no greater anxiety than to find someone quickly to whom
							
							he can hand over that gift of freedom with which the ill-fated
							
							creature is born. But only one who can appease their conscience can
							
							take over their freedom. In bread there was offered Thee an invincible
							
							banner; give bread, and man will worship thee, for nothing is more
							
							certain than bread. But if someone else gains possession of his
							
							conscience--Oh! then he will cast away Thy bread and follow after
							
							him who has ensnared his conscience. In that Thou wast right. For
							
							the secret of man's being is not only to live but to have something to
							
							live for. Without a stable conception of the object of life, man would
							
							not consent to go on living, and would rather destroy himself than
							
							remain on earth, though he had bread in abundance. That is true. But
							
							what happened? Instead of taking men's freedom from them, Thou didst
							
							make it greater than ever! Didst Thou forget that man prefers peace,
							
							and even death, to freedom of choice in the knowledge of good and
							
							evil? Nothing is more seductive for man than his freedom of
							
							conscience, but nothing is a greater cause of suffering. And behold,
							
							instead of giving a firm foundation for setting the conscience of
							
							man at rest for ever, Thou didst choose all that is exceptional, vague
							
							and enigmatic; Thou didst choose what was utterly beyond the
							
							strength of men, acting as though Thou didst not love them at all-
							
							Thou who didst come to give Thy life for them! Instead of taking
							
							possession of men's freedom, Thou didst increase it, and burdened
							
							the spiritual kingdom of mankind with its sufferings for ever. Thou
							
							didst desire man's free love, that he should follow Thee freely,
							
							enticed and taken captive by Thee. In place of the rigid ancient
							
							law, man must hereafter with free heart decide for himself what is
							
							good and what is evil, having only Thy image before him as his
							
							guide. But didst Thou not know that he would at last reject even Thy
							
							image and Thy truth, if he is weighed down with the fearful burden
							
							of free choice? They will cry aloud at last that the truth is not in
							
							Thee, for they could not have been left in greater confusion and
							
							suffering than Thou hast caused, laying upon them so many cares and
							
							unanswerable problems.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p30">"'So that, in truth, Thou didst Thyself lay the foundation for the
							
							destruction of Thy kingdom, and no one is more to blame for it. Yet
							
							what was offered Thee? There are three powers, three powers alone,
							
							able to conquer and to hold captive for ever the conscience of these
							
							impotent rebels for their happiness those forces are miracle,
							
							mystery and authority. Thou hast rejected all three and hast set the
							
							example for doing so. When the wise and dread spirit set Thee on the
							
							pinnacle of the temple and said to Thee, "If Thou wouldst know whether
							
							Thou art the Son of God then cast Thyself down, for it is written: the
							
							angels shall hold him up lest he fall and bruise himself, and Thou
							
							shalt know then whether Thou art the Son of God and shalt prove then
							
							how great is Thy faith in Thy Father." But Thou didst refuse and
							
							wouldst not cast Thyself down. Oh, of course, Thou didst proudly and
							
							well, like God; but the weak, unruly race of men, are they gods? Oh,
							
							Thou didst know then that in taking one step, in making one movement
							
							to cast Thyself down, Thou wouldst be tempting God and have lost all
							
							Thy faith in Him, and wouldst have been dashed to pieces against
							
							that earth which Thou didst come to save. And the wise spirit that
							
							tempted Thee would have rejoiced. But I ask again, are there many like
							
							Thee? And couldst Thou believe for one moment that men, too, could
							
							face such a temptation? Is the nature of men such, that they can
							
							reject miracle, and at the great moments of their life, the moments of
							
							their deepest, most agonising spiritual difficulties, cling only to
							
							the free verdict of the heart? Oh, Thou didst know that Thy deed would
							
							be recorded in books, would be handed down to remote times and the
							
							utmost ends of the earth, and Thou didst hope that man, following
							
							Thee, would cling to God and not ask for a miracle. But Thou didst not
							
							know that when man rejects miracle he rejects God too; for man seeks
							
							not so much God as the miraculous. And as man cannot bear to be
							
							without the miraculous, he will create new miracles of his own for
							
							himself, and will worship deeds of sorcery and witchcraft, though he
							
							might be a hundred times over a rebel, heretic and infidel. Thou didst
							
							not come down from the Cross when they shouted to Thee, mocking and
							
							reviling Thee, "Come down from the cross and we will believe that Thou
							
							art He." Thou didst not come down, for again Thou wouldst not
							
							enslave man by a miracle, and didst crave faith given freely, not
							
							based on miracle. Thou didst crave for free love and not the base
							
							raptures of the slave before the might that has overawed him for ever.
							
							But Thou didst think too highly of men therein, for they are slaves,
							
							of course, though rebellious by nature. Look round and judge;
							
							fifteen centuries have passed, look upon them. Whom hast Thou raised
							
							up to Thyself? I swear, man is weaker and baser by nature than Thou
							
							hast believed him! Can he, can he do what Thou didst? By showing him
							
							so much respect, Thou didst, as it were, cease to feel for him, for
							
							Thou didst ask far too much from him--Thou who hast loved him more
							
							than Thyself! Respecting him less, Thou wouldst have asked less of
							
							him. That would have been more like love, for his burden would have
							
							been lighter. He is weak and vile. What though he is everywhere now
							
							rebelling against our power, and proud of his rebellion? It is the
							
							pride of a child and a schoolboy. They are little children rioting and
							
							barring out the teacher at school. But their childish delight will
							
							end; it will cost them dear. Mankind as a whole has always striven
							
							to organise a universal state. There have been many great nations with
							
							great histories, but the more highly they were developed the more
							
							unhappy they were, for they felt more acutely than other people the
							
							craving for world-wide union. The great conquerors, Timours and
							
							Ghenghis-Khans, whirled like hurricanes over the face of the earth
							
							striving to subdue its people, and they too were but the unconscious
							
							expression of the same craving for universal unity. Hadst Thou taken
							
							the world and Caesar's purple, Thou wouldst have founded the universal
							
							state and have given universal peace. For who can rule men if not he
							
							who holds their conscience and their bread in his hands? We have taken
							
							the sword of Caesar, and in taking it, of course, have rejected Thee
							
							and followed him. Oh, ages are yet to come of the confusion of free
							
							thought, of their science and cannibalism. For having begun to build
							
							their tower of Babel without us, they will end, of course, with
							
							cannibalism. But then the beast will crawl to us and lick our feet and
							
							spatter them with tears of blood. And we shall sit upon the beast
							
							and raise the cup, and on it will be written, "Mystery." But then, and
							
							only then, the reign of peace and happiness will come for men. Thou
							
							art proud of Thine elect, but Thou hast only the elect, while we
							
							give rest to all. And besides, how many of those elect, those mighty
							
							ones who could become elect, have grown weary waiting for Thee, and
							
							have transferred and will transfer the powers of their spirit and
							
							the warmth of their heart to the other camp, and end by raising
							
							their free banner against Thee. Thou didst Thyself lift up that
							
							banner. But with us all will be happy and will no more rebel nor
							
							destroy one another as under Thy freedom. Oh, we shall persuade them
							
							that they will only become free when they renounce their freedom to us
							
							and submit to us. And shall we be right or shall we be lying? They
							
							will be convinced that we are right, for they will remember the
							
							horrors of slavery and confusion to which Thy freedom brought them.
							
							Freedom, free thought, and science will lead them into such straits
							
							and will bring them face to face with such marvels and insoluble
							
							mysteries, that some of them, the fierce and rebellious, will
							
							destroy themselves, others, rebellious but weak, will destroy one
							
							another, while the rest, weak and unhappy, will crawl fawning to our
							
							feet and whine to us: "Yes, you were right, you alone possess His
							
							mystery, and we come back to you, save us from ourselves!"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p31">"'Receiving bread from us, they will see clearly that we take
							
							the bread made by their hands from them, to give it to them, without
							
							any miracle. They will see that we do not change the stones to
							
							bread, but in truth they will be more thankful for taking it from
							
							our hands than for the bread itself! For they will remember only too
							
							well that in old days, without our help, even the bread they made
							
							turned to stones in their hands, while since they have come back to
							
							us, the very stones have turned to bread in their hands. Too, too well
							
							will they know the value of complete submission! And until men know
							
							that, they will be unhappy. Who is most to blame for their not knowing
							
							it?-speak! Who scattered the flock and sent it astray on unknown
							
							paths? But the flock will come together again and will submit once
							
							more, and then it will be once for all. Then we shall give them the
							
							quiet humble happiness of weak creatures such as they are by nature.
							
							Oh, we shall persuade them at last not to be proud, for Thou didst
							
							lift them up and thereby taught them to be proud. We shall show them
							
							that they are weak, that they are only pitiful children, but that
							
							childlike happiness is the sweetest of all. They will become timid and
							
							will look to us and huddle close to us in fear, as chicks to the
							
							hen. They will marvel at us and will be awe-stricken before us, and
							
							will be proud at our being so powerful and clever that we have been
							
							able to subdue such a turbulent flock of thousands of millions. They
							
							will tremble impotently before our wrath, their minds will grow
							
							fearful, they will be quick to shed tears like women and children, but
							
							they will be just as ready at a sign from us to pass to laughter and
							
							rejoicing, to happy mirth and childish song. Yes, we shall set them to
							
							work, but in their leisure hours we shall make their life like a
							
							child's game, with children's songs and innocent dance. Oh, we shall
							
							allow them even sin, they are weak and helpless, and they will love us
							
							like children because we allow them to sin. We shall tell them that
							
							every sin will be expiated, if it is done with our permission, that we
							
							allow them to sin because we love them, and the punishment for these
							
							sins we take upon ourselves. And we shall take it upon ourselves,
							
							and they will adore us as their saviours who have taken on
							
							themselves their sins before God. And they will have no secrets from
							
							us. We shall allow or forbid them to live with their wives and
							
							mistresses, to have or not to have children according to whether
							
							they have been obedient or disobedient--and they will submit to us
							
							gladly and cheerfully. The most painful secrets of their conscience,
							
							all, all they will bring to us, and we shall have an answer for all.
							
							And they will be glad to believe our answer, for it will save them
							
							from the great anxiety and terrible agony they endure at present in
							
							making a free decision for themselves. And all will be happy, all
							
							the millions of creatures except the hundred thousand who rule over
							
							them. For only we, we who guard the mystery, shall be unhappy. There
							
							will be thousands of millions of happy babes, and a hundred thousand
							
							sufferers who have taken upon themselves the curse of the knowledge of
							
							good and evil. Peacefully they will die, peacefully they will expire
							
							in Thy name, and beyond the grave they will find nothing but death.
							
							But we shall keep the secret, and for their happiness we shall
							
							allure them with the reward of heaven and eternity. Though if there
							
							were anything in the other world, it certainly would not be for such
							
							as they. It is prophesied that Thou wilt come again in victory, Thou
							
							wilt come with Thy chosen, the proud and strong, but we will say
							
							that they have only saved themselves, but we have saved all. We are
							
							told that the harlot who sits upon the beast, and holds in her hands
							
							the mystery, shall be put to shame, that the weak will rise up
							
							again, and will rend her royal purple and will strip naked her
							
							loathsome body. But then I will stand up and point out to Thee the
							
							thousand millions of happy children who have known no sin. And we
							
							who have taken their sins upon us for their happiness will stand up
							
							before Thee and say: "Judge us if Thou canst and darest." Know that
							
							I fear Thee not. Know that I too have been in the wilderness, I too
							
							have lived on roots and locusts, I too prized the freedom with which
							
							Thou hast blessed men, and I too was striving to stand among Thy
							
							elect, among the strong and powerful, thirsting "to make up the
							
							number." But I awakened and would not serve madness. I turned back and
							
							joined the ranks of those who have corrected Thy work. I left the
							
							proud and went back to the humble, for the happiness of the humble.
							
							What I say to Thee will come to pass, and our dominion will be built
							
							up. I repeat, to-morrow Thou shalt see that obedient flock who at a
							
							sign from me will hasten to heap up the hot cinders about the pile
							
							on which I shall burn Thee for coming to hinder us. For if anyone
							
							has ever deserved our fires, it is Thou. To-morrow I shall burn
							
							Thee. Dixi.'"*
							
							
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p32">* I have spoken.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p33">Ivan stopped. He was carried away as he talked, and spoke with
							
							excitement; when he had finished, he suddenly smiled.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p34">Alyosha had listened in silence; towards the end he was greatly
							
							moved and seemed several times on the point of interrupting, but
							
							restrained himself. Now his words came with a rush.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p35">"But... that's absurd!" he cried, flushing. "Your poem is in
							
							praise of Jesus, not in blame of Him--as you meant it to be. And who
							
							will believe you about freedom? Is that the way to understand it?
							
							That's not the idea of it in the Orthodox Church.... That's Rome,
							
							and not even the whole of Rome, it's false-those are the worst of
							
							the Catholics the Inquisitors, the Jesuits!... And there could not
							
							be such a fantastic creature as your Inquisitor. What are these sins
							
							of mankind they take on themselves? Who are these keepers of the
							
							mystery who have taken some curse upon themselves for the happiness of
							
							mankind? When have they been seen? We know the Jesuits, they are
							
							spoken ill of, but surely they are not what you describe? They are not
							
							that at all, not at all.... They are simply the Romish army for the
							
							earthly sovereignty of the world in the future, with the Pontiff of
							
							Rome for Emperor... that's their ideal, but there's no sort of mystery
							
							or lofty melancholy about it.... It's simple lust of power, of
							
							filthy earthly gain, of domination-something like a universal
							
							serfdom with them as masters-that's all they stand for. They don't
							
							even believe in God perhaps. Your suffering Inquisitor is a mere
							
							fantasy."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p36">"Stay, stay," laughed Ivan. "how hot you are! A fantasy you say,
							
							let it be so! Of course it's a fantasy. But allow me to say: do you
							
							really think that the Roman Catholic movement of the last centuries is
							
							actually nothing but the lust of power, of filthy earthly gain? Is
							
							that Father Paissy's teaching?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p37">"No, no, on the contrary, Father Paissy did once say something
							
							rather the same as you... but of course it's not the same, not a bit
							
							the same," Alyosha hastily corrected himself.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p38">"A precious admission, in spite of your 'not a bit the same.' I
							
							ask you why your Jesuits and Inquisitors have united simply for vile
							
							material gain? Why can there not be among them one martyr oppressed by
							
							great sorrow and loving humanity? You see, only suppose that there was
							
							one such man among all those who desire nothing but filthy material
							
							gain-if there's only one like my old Inquisitor, who had himself eaten
							
							roots in the desert and made frenzied efforts to subdue his flesh to
							
							make himself free and perfect. But yet all his life he loved humanity,
							
							and suddenly his eyes were opened, and he saw that it is no great
							
							moral blessedness to attain perfection and freedom, if at the same
							
							time one gains the conviction that millions of God's creatures have
							
							been created as a mockery, that they will never be capable of using
							
							their freedom, that these poor rebels can never turn into giants to
							
							complete the tower, that it was not for such geese that the great
							
							idealist dreamt his dream of harmony. Seeing all that he turned back
							
							and joined--the clever people. Surely that could have happened?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p39">"Joined whom, what clever people?" cried Alyosha, completely
							
							carried away. "They have no such great cleverness and no mysteries and
							
							secrets.... Perhaps nothing but Atheism, that's all their secret. Your
							
							Inquisitor does not believe in God, that's his secret!"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p40">"What if it is so! At last you have guessed it. It's perfectly
							
							true, it's true that that's the whole secret, but isn't that
							
							suffering, at least for a man like that, who has wasted his whole life
							
							in the desert and yet could not shake off his incurable love of
							
							humanity? In his old age he reached the clear conviction that
							
							nothing but the advice of the great dread spirit could build up any
							
							tolerable sort of life for the feeble, unruly, 'incomplete,
							
							empirical creatures created in jest.' And so, convinced of this, he
							
							sees that he must follow the counsel of the wise spirit, the dread
							
							spirit of death and destruction, and therefore accept lying and
							
							deception, and lead men consciously to death and destruction, and
							
							yet deceive them all the way so that they may not notice where they
							
							are being led, that the poor blind creatures may at least on the way
							
							think themselves happy. And note, the deception is in the name of
							
							Him in Whose ideal the old man had so fervently believed all his
							
							life long. Is not that tragic? And if only one such stood at the
							
							head of the whole army 'filled with the lust of power only for the
							
							sake of filthy gain'--would not one such be enough to make a
							
							tragedy? More than that, one such standing at the head is enough to
							
							create the actual leading idea of the Roman Church with all its armies
							
							and Jesuits, its highest idea. I tell you frankly that I firmly
							
							believe that there has always been such a man among those who stood at
							
							the head of the movement. Who knows, there may have been some such
							
							even among the Roman Popes. Who knows, perhaps the spirit of that
							
							accursed old man who loves mankind so obstinately in his own way, is
							
							to be found even now in a whole multitude of such old men, existing
							
							not by chance but by agreement, as a secret league formed long ago for
							
							the guarding of the mystery, to guard it from the weak and the
							
							unhappy, so as to make them happy. No doubt it is so, and so it must
							
							be indeed. I fancy that even among the Masons there's something of the
							
							same mystery at the bottom, and that that's why the Catholics so
							
							detest the Masons as their rivals breaking up the unity of the idea,
							
							while it is so essential that there should be one flock and one
							
							shepherd.... But from the way I defend my idea I might be an author
							
							impatient of your criticism. Enough of it."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p41">"You are perhaps a Mason yourself!" broke suddenly from Alyosha.
							
							"You don't believe in God," he added, speaking this time very
							
							sorrowfully. He fancied besides that his brother was looking at him
							
							ironically. "How does your poem end?" he asked, suddenly looking down.
							
							"Or was it the end?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p42">"I meant to end it like this. When the Inquisitor ceased
							
							speaking he waited some time for his Prisoner to answer him. His
							
							silence weighed down upon him. He saw that the Prisoner had listened
							
							intently all the time, looking gently in his face and evidently not
							
							wishing to reply. The old man longed for him to say something, however
							
							bitter and terrible. But He suddenly approached the old man in silence
							
							and softly kissed him on his bloodless aged lips. That was all his
							
							answer. The old man shuddered. His lips moved. He went to the door,
							
							opened it, and said to Him: 'Go, and come no more... come not at
							
							all, never, never!' And he let Him out into the dark alleys of the
							
							town. The Prisoner went away."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p43">"And the old man?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p44">"The kiss glows in his heart, but the old man adheres to his
							
							idea."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p45">"And you with him, you too?" cried Alyosha, mournfully.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p46">Ivan laughed.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p47">"Why, it's all nonsense, Alyosha. It's only a senseless poem of
							
							a senseless student, who could never write two lines of verse. Why
							
							do you take it so seriously? Surely you don't suppose I am going
							
							straight off to the Jesuits, to join the men who are correcting His
							
							work? Good Lord, it's no business of mine. I told you, all I want is
							
							to live on to thirty, and then... dash the cup to the ground!"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p48">"But the little sticky leaves, and the precious tombs, and the
							
							blue sky, and the woman you love! How will you live, how will you love
							
							them?" Alyosha cried sorrowfully. "With such a hell in your heart
							
							and your head, how can you? No, that's just what you are going away
							
							for, to join them... if not, you will kill yourself, you can't
							
							endure it!"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p49">"There is a strength to endure everything," Ivan said with a
							
							cold smile.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p50">"The strength of the Karamazovs--the strength of the Karamazov
							
							baseness."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p51">"To sink into debauchery, to stifle your soul with corruption,
							
							yes?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p52">"Possibly even that... only perhaps till I am thirty I shall
							
							escape it, and then-"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p53">"How will you escape it? By what will you escape it? That's
							
							impossible with your ideas."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p54">"In the Karamazov way, again."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p55">"'Everything is lawful,' you mean? Everything is lawful, is that
							
							it?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p56">Ivan scowled, and all at once turned strangely pale.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p57">"Ah, you've caught up yesterday's phrase, which so offended
							
							Muisov--and which Dmitri pounced upon so naively and paraphrased!"
							
							he smiled queerly. "Yes, if you like, 'everything is lawful' since the
							
							word has been said, I won't deny it. And Mitya's version isn't bad."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p58">Alyosha looked at him in silence.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p59">"I thought that going away from here I have you at least," Ivan
							
							said suddenly, with unexpected feeling; "but now I see that there is
							
							no place for me even in your heart, my dear hermit. The formula,
							
							'all is lawful,' I won't renounce--will you renounce me for that,
							
							yes?"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p60">Alyosha got up, went to him and softly kissed him on the lips.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p61">"That's plagiarism," cried Ivan, highly delighted. "You stole that
							
							from my poem. Thank you though. Get up, Alyosha, it's time we were
							
							going, both of us."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p62">They went out, but stopped when they reached the entrance of the
							
							restaurant.
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p63">"Listen, Alyosha," Ivan began in a resolute voice, "if I am really
							
							able to care for the sticky little leaves I shall only love them,
							
							remembering you. It's enough for me that you are somewhere here, and I
							
							shan't lose my desire for life yet. Is that enough for you? Take it as
							
							a declaration of love if you like. And now you go to the right and I
							
							to the left. And it's enough, do you hear, enough. I mean even if I
							
							don't go away to-morrow (I think I certainly shall go) and we meet
							
							again, don't say a word more on these subjects. I beg that
							
							particularly. And about Dmitri too, I ask you specially, never speak
							
							to me again," he added, with sudden irritation; "it's all exhausted,
							
							it has all been said over and over again, hasn't it? And I'll make you
							
							one promise in return for it. When at thirty, I want to 'dash the
							
							cup to the ground,' wherever I may be I'll come to have one more
							
							talk with you, even though it were from America, you may be sure of
							
							that. I'll come on purpose. It will be very interesting to have a look
							
							at you, to see what you'll be by that time. It's rather a solemn
							
							promise, you see. And we really may be parting for seven years or ten.
							
							Come, go now to your Pater Seraphicus, he is dying. If he dies without
							
							you, you will be angry with me for having kept you. Good-bye, kiss
							
							me once more; that's right, now go."
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p64">Ivan turned suddenly and went his way without looking back. It was
							
							just as Dmitri had left Alyosha the day before, though the parting had
							
							been very different. The strange resemblance flashed like an arrow
							
							through Alyosha's mind in the distress and dejection of that moment.
							
							He waited a little, looking after his brother. He suddenly noticed
							
							that Ivan swayed as he walked and that his right shoulder looked lower
							
							than his left. He had never noticed it before. But all at once he
							
							turned too, and almost ran to the monastery. It was nearly dark, and
							
							he felt almost frightened; something new was growing up in him for
							
							which he could not account. The wind had risen again as on the
							
							previous evening, and the ancient pines murmured gloomily about him
							
							when he entered the hermitage copse. He almost ran. "Pater Seraphicus-
							
							he got that name from somewhere--where from?" Alyosha wondered. "Ivan,
							
							poor Ivan, and when shall I see you again?... Here is the hermitage.
							
							Yes, yes, that he is, Pater Seraphicus, he will save me--from him
							
							and for ever!"
							
								</p><p id="v_4-p65">Several times afterwards he wondered how he could, on leaving
							
							Ivan, so completely forget his brother Dmitri, though he had that
							
							morning, only a few hours before, so firmly resolved to find him and
							
							not to give up doing so, even should he be unable to return to the
							
							monastery that night.</p>
												
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - For Awhile a Very Obscure One" prev="v_4" next="vii_3" id="vi_3">
					
					
							<p id="vi_3-p1">AND Ivan, on parting from Alyosha, went home to Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch's house. But, strange to say, he was overcome by
							
							insufferable depression, which grew greater at every step he took
							
							towards the house. There was nothing strange in his being depressed;
							
							what was strange was that Ivan could not have said what was the
							
							cause of it. He had often been depressed before, and there was nothing
							
							surprising at his feeling so at such a moment, when he had broken
							
							off with everything had brought him here, and was preparing that day
							
							to make a new start and enter upon a new, unknown future. He would
							
							again be as solitary as ever, and though he had great hopes, and
							
							great- too great- expectations from life, he could not have given
							
							any definite account of his hopes, his expectations, or even his
							
							desires.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p2">Yet at that moment, though the apprehension of the new and unknown
							
							certainly found place in his heart, what was worrying him was
							
							something quite different. "Is it loathing for my father's house?"
							
							he wondered. "Quite likely; I am so sick of it; and though it's the
							
							last time I shall cross its hateful threshold, still I loathe it....
							
							No, it's not that either. Is it the parting with Alyosha and the
							
							conversation I had with him? For so many years I've been silent with
							
							the whole world and not deigned to speak, and all of a sudden I reel
							
							off a rigmarole like that." certainly might have been the youthful
							
							vexation of youthful inexperience and vanity- vexation at having
							
							failed to express himself, especially with such a being as Alyosha, on
							
							whom his heart had certainly been reckoning. No doubt that came in,
							
							that vexation, it must have done indeed; but yet that was not it, that
							
							was not it either. "I feel sick with depression and yet I can't tell
							
							what I want. Better not think, perhaps."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p3">Ivan tried "not to think," but that, too, was no use. What made
							
							his depression so vexatious and irritating was that it had a kind of
							
							casual, external character- he felt that. Some person or thing
							
							seemed to be standing out somewhere, just as something will
							
							sometimes obtrude itself upon the eye, and though one may be so busy
							
							with work or conversation that for a long time one does not notice it,
							
							yet it irritates and almost torments one till at last one realises,
							
							and removes the offending object, often quite a trifling and
							
							ridiculous one- some article left about in the wrong place, a
							
							handkerchief on the floor, a book not replaced on the shelf, and so
							
							on.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p4">At last, feeling very cross and ill-humoured, Ivan arrived home,
							
							and suddenly, about fifteen paces from the garden gate, he guessed
							
							what was fretting and worrying him.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p5">On a bench in the gateway the valet Smerdyakov was sitting
							
							enjoying the coolness of the evening, and at the first glance at him
							
							Ivan knew that the valet Smerdyakov was on his mind, and that it was
							
							this man that his soul loathed. It all dawned upon him suddenly and
							
							became clear. just before, when Alyosha had been telling him of his
							
							meeting with Smerdyakov, he had felt a sudden twinge of gloom and
							
							loathing, which had immediately stirred responsive anger in his heart.
							
							Afterwards, as he talked, Smerdyakov had been forgotten for the
							
							time; but still he had been in his mind, and as soon as Ivan parted
							
							with Alyosha and was walking home, the forgotten sensation began to
							
							obtrude itself again. "Is it possible that a miserable, contemptible
							
							creature like that can worry me so much?" he wondered, with
							
							insufferable irritation.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p6">It was true that Ivan had come of late to feel an intense
							
							dislike for the man, especially during the last few days. He had
							
							even begun to notice in himself a growing feeling that was almost of
							
							hatred for the creature. Perhaps this hatred was accentuated by the
							
							fact that when Ivan first came to the neighbourhood he had felt
							
							quite differently. Then he had taken a marked interest in
							
							Smerdyakov, and had even thought him very original. He had
							
							encouraged him to talk to him, although he had always wondered at a
							
							certain incoherence, or rather restlessness, in his mind, and could
							
							not understand what it was that so continually and insistently
							
							worked upon the brain of "the contemplative." They discussed
							
							philosophical questions and even how there could have been light on
							
							the first day when the sun, moon, and stars were only created on the
							
							fourth day, and how that was to be understood. But Ivan soon saw that,
							
							though the sun, moon, and stars might be an interesting subject, yet
							
							that it was quite secondary to Smerdyakov, and that he was looking for
							
							something altogether different. In one way and another, he began to
							
							betray a boundless vanity, and a wounded vanity, too, and that Ivan
							
							disliked. It had first given rise to his aversion. Later on, there had
							
							been trouble in the house. Grushenka had come on the scene, and
							
							there had been the scandals with his brother Dmitri- they discussed
							
							that, too. But though Smerdyakov always talked of that with great
							
							excitement, it was impossible to discover what he desired to come of
							
							it. There was, in fact, something surprising in the illogicality and
							
							incoherence of some of his desires, accidentally betrayed and always
							
							vaguely expressed. Smerdyakov was always inquiring, putting certain
							
							indirect but obviously premeditated questions, but what his object was
							
							he did not explain, and usually at the most important moment he
							
							would break off and relapse into silence or pass to another subject.
							
							But what finally irritated Ivan most and confirmed his dislike for him
							
							was the peculiar, revolting familiarity which Smerdyakov began to show
							
							more and more markedly. Not that he forgot himself and was rude; on
							
							the contrary, he always spoke very respectfully, yet he had
							
							obviously begun to consider- goodness knows why!- that there was
							
							some sort of understanding between him and Ivan Fyodorovitch. He
							
							always spoke in a tone that suggested that those two had some kind
							
							of compact, some secret between them, that had at some time been
							
							expressed on both sides, only known to them and beyond the
							
							comprehension of those around them. But for a long while Ivan did
							
							not recognise the real cause of his growing dislike and he had only
							
							lately realised what was at the root of it.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p7">With a feeling of disgust and irritation he tried to pass in at
							
							the gate without speaking or looking at Smerdyakov. But Smerdyakov
							
							rose from the bench, and from that action alone, Ivan knew instantly
							
							that he wanted particularly to talk to him. Ivan looked at him and
							
							stopped, and the fact that he did stop, instead of passing by, as he
							
							meant to the minute before, drove him to fury. With anger and
							
							repulsion he looked at Smerdyakov's emasculate, sickly face, with
							
							the little curls combed forward on his forehead. His left eye winked
							
							and he grinned as if to say, "Where are you going? You won't pass
							
							by; you see that we two clever people have something to say to each
							
							other."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p8">Ivan shook. "Get away, miserable idiot. What have I to do with
							
							you?" was on the tip of his tongue, but to his profound astonishment
							
							he heard himself say, "Is my father still asleep, or has he waked?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p9">He asked the question softly and meekly, to his own surprise,
							
							and at once, again to his own surprise, sat down on the bench. For
							
							an instant he felt almost frightened; he remembered it afterwards.
							
							Smerdyakov stood facing him, his hands behind his back, looking at him
							
							with assurance and almost severity.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p10">"His honour is still asleep," he articulated deliberately ("You
							
							were the first to speak, not I," he seemed to say). "I am surprised at
							
							you, sir," he added, after a pause, dropping his eyes affectedly,
							
							setting his right foot forward, and playing with the tip of his
							
							polished boot.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p11">"Why are you surprised at me?" Ivan asked abruptly and sullenly,
							
							doing his utmost to restrain himself, and suddenly realising, with
							
							disgust, that he was feeling intense curiosity and would not, on any
							
							account, have gone away without satisfying it.
							
								"Why don't you go to Tchermashnya, sir?" Smerdyakov suddenly
							
							raised his eyes and smiled familiarly. "Why I smile you must
							
							understand of yourself, if you are a clever man," his screwed-up
							
							left eye seemed to say.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p12">"Why should I go to Tchermashnya?" Ivan asked in surprise.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p13">Smerdyakov was silent again.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p14">"Fyodor Pavlovitch himself has so begged you to," he said at last,
							
							slowly and apparently attaching no significance to his answer. "I
							
							put you off with a secondary reason," he seemed to suggest, "simply to
							
							say something."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p15">"Damn you! Speak out what you want!" Ivan cried angrily at last,
							
							passing from meekness to violence.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p16">Smerdyakov drew his right foot up to his left, pulled himself
							
							up, but still looked at him with the same serenity and the same little
							
							smile.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p17">"Substantially nothing- but just by way of conversation."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p18">Another silence followed. They did not speak for nearly a
							
							minute. Ivan knew that he ought to get up and show anger, and
							
							Smerdyakov stood before him and seemed to be waiting as though to
							
							see whether he would be angry or not. So at least it seemed to Ivan.
							
							At last he moved to get up. Smerdyakov seemed to seize the moment.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p19">"I'm in an awful position, Ivan Fyodorovitch. I don't know how
							
							to help myself," he said resolutely and distinctly, and at his last
							
							word he sighed. Ivan Fyodorovitch sat down again.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p20">"They are both utterly crazy, they are no better than little
							
							children," Smerdyakov went on. "I am speaking of your parent and
							
							your brother Dmitri Fyodorovitch. Here Fyodor Pavlovitch will get up
							
							directly and begin worrying me every minute, 'Has she come? Why hasn't
							
							she come?' and so on up till midnight and even after midnight. And
							
							if Agrafena Alexandrovna doesn't come (for very likely she does not
							
							mean to come at all) then he will be at me again to-morrow morning,
							
							'Why hasn't she come? When will she come?'- as though I were to
							
							blame for it. On the other side it's no better. As soon as it gets
							
							dark, or even before, your brother will appear with his gun in his
							
							hands: 'Look out, you rogue, you soup-maker. If you miss her and don't
							
							let me know she's been- I'll kill you before anyone.' When the night's
							
							over, in the morning, he, too, like Fyodor Pavlovitch, begins worrying
							
							me to death. 'Why hasn't she come? Will she come soon?' And he, too,
							
							thinks me to blame because his lady hasn't come. And every day and
							
							every hour they get angrier and angrier, so that I sometimes think I
							
							shall kill myself in a fright. I can't depend them, sir."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p21">"And why have you meddled? Why did you begin to spy for Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch?" said Ivan irritably.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p22">"How could I help meddling? Though, indeed, I haven't meddled at
							
							all, if you want to know the truth of the matter. I kept quiet from
							
							the very beginning, not daring to answer; but he pitched on me to be
							
							his servant. He has had only one thing to say since: 'I'll kill you,
							
							you scoundrel, if you miss her.' I feel certain, sir, that I shall
							
							have a long fit to-morrow."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p23">"What do you mean by 'a long fit'?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p24">"A long fit, lasting a long time- several hours, or perhaps a
							
							day or two. Once it went on for three days. I fell from the garret
							
							that time. The struggling ceased and then began again, and for three
							
							days I couldn't come back to my senses. Fyodor Pavlovitch sent for
							
							Herzenstube, the doctor here, and he put ice on my head and tried
							
							another remedy, too.... I might have died."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p25">"But they say one can't tell with epilepsy when a fit is coming.
							
							What makes you say you will have one to-morrow?" Ivan inquired, with a
							
							peculiar, irritable curiosity.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p26">"That's just so. You can't tell beforehand."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p27">"Besides, you fell from the garret then."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p28">"I climb up to the garret every day. I might fall from the
							
							garret again to-morrow. And, if not, I might fall down the cellar
							
							steps. I have to go into the cellar every day, too."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p29">Ivan took a long look at him.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p30">"You are talking nonsense, I see, and I don't quite understand
							
							you," he said softly, but with a sort of menace. "Do you mean to
							
							pretend to be ill to-morrow for three days, eh?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p31">Smerdyakov, who was looking at the ground again, and playing
							
							with the toe of his right foot, set the foot down, moved the left
							
							one forward, and, grinning, articulated:
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p32">"If I were able to play such a trick, that is, pretend to have a
							
							fit- and it would not be difficult for a man accustomed to them- I
							
							should have a perfect right to use such a means to save myself from
							
							death. For even if Agrafena Alexandrovna comes to see his father while
							
							I am ill, his honour can't blame a sick man for not telling him.
							
							He'd be ashamed to."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p33">"Hang it all!" Ivan cried, his face working with anger, "Why are
							
							you always in such a funk for your life? All my brother Dmitri's
							
							threats are only hasty words and mean nothing. He won't kill you; it's
							
							not you he'll kill!"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p34">"He'd kill me first of all, like a fly. But even more than that, I
							
							am afraid I shall be taken for an accomplice of his when he does
							
							something crazy to his father."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p35">"Why should you be taken for an accomplice?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p36">"They'll think I am an accomplice, because I let him know the
							
							signals as a great secret."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p37">"What signals? Whom did you tell? Confound you, speak more
							
							plainly."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p38">"I'm bound to admit the fact," Smerdyakov drawled with pedantic
							
							composure, "that I have a secret with Fyodor Pavlovitch in this
							
							business. As you know yourself (if only you do know it) he has for
							
							several days past locked himself in as soon as night or even evening
							
							comes on. Of late you've been going upstairs to your room early
							
							every evening, and yesterday you did not come down at all, and so
							
							perhaps you don't know how carefully he has begun to lock himself in
							
							at night, and even if Grigory Vassilyevitch comes to the door he won't
							
							open to him till he hears his voice. But Grigory Vassilyevitch does
							
							not come, because I wait upon him alone in his room now. That's the
							
							arrangement he made himself ever since this to-do with Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna began. But at night, by his orders, I go away to the
							
							lodge so that I don't get to sleep till midnight, but am on the watch,
							
							getting up and walking about the yard, waiting for Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna to come. For the last few days he's been perfectly
							
							frantic expecting her. What he argues is, she is afraid of him, Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch (Mitya, as he calls him), 'and so,' says he, 'she'll come
							
							the back-way, late at night, to me. You look out for her,' says he,
							
							'till midnight and later; and if she does come, you run up and knock
							
							at my door or at the window from the garden. Knock at first twice,
							
							rather gently, and then three times more quickly, then,' says he, 'I
							
							shall understand at once that she has come, and will open the door
							
							to you quietly.' Another signal he gave me in case anything unexpected
							
							happens. At first, two knocks, and then, after an interval, another
							
							much louder. Then he will understand that something has happened
							
							suddenly and that I must see him, and he will open to me so that I can
							
							go and speak to him. That's all in case Agrafena Alexandrovna can't
							
							come herself, but sends a message. Besides, Dmitri Fyodorovitch
							
							might come, too, so I must let him know he is near. His honour is
							
							awfully afraid of Dmitri Fyodorovitch, so that even if Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna had come and were locked in with him, and Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch were to turn up anywhere near at the time, I should be
							
							bound to let him know at once, knocking three times. So that the first
							
							signal of five knocks means Agrafena Alexandrovna has come, while
							
							the second signal of three knocks means 'something important to tell
							
							you.' His honour has shown me them several times and explained them.
							
							And as in the whole universe no one knows of these signals but
							
							myself and his honour, so he'd open the door without the slightest
							
							hesitation and without calling out (he is awfully afraid of calling
							
							out aloud). Well, those signals are known to Dmitri Fyodorovitch
							
							too, now."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p39">"How are they known? Did you tell him? How dared you tell him?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p40">"It was through fright I did it. How could I dare to keep it
							
							back from him? Dmitri Fyodorovitch kept persisting every day, 'You are
							
							deceiving me, you are hiding something from me! I'll break both your
							
							legs for you.' So I told him those secret signals that he might see my
							
							slavish devotion, and might be satisfied that I was not deceiving him,
							
							but was telling him all I could."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p41">"If you think that he'll make use of those signals and try to
							
							get in, don't let him in."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p42">"But if I should be laid up with a fit, how can I prevent him
							
							coming in then, even if I dared prevent him, knowing how desperate
							
							he is?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p43">"Hang it! How can you be so sure you are going to have a fit,
							
							confound you? Are you laughing at me?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p44">"How could I dare laugh at you? I am in no laughing humour with
							
							this fear on me. I feel I am going to have a fit. I have a
							
							presentiment. Fright alone will bring it on."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p45">"Confound it! If you are laid up, Grigory will be on the watch.
							
							Let Grigory know beforehand; he will be sure not to let him in."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p46">"I should never dare to tell Grigory Vassilyevitch about the
							
							signals without orders from my master. And as for Grigory
							
							Vassilyevitch hearing him and not admitting him, he has been ill
							
							ever since yesterday, and Marfa Ignatyevna intends to give him
							
							medicine to-morrow. They've just arranged it. It's a very strange
							
							remedy of hers. Marfa Ignatyevna knows of a preparation and always
							
							keeps it. It's a strong thing made from some herb. She has the
							
							secret of it, and she always gives it to Grigory Vassilyevitch three
							
							times a year when his lumbago's so bad he is almost paralysed by it.
							
							Then she takes a towel, wets it with the stuff, and rubs his whole
							
							back for half an hour till it's quite red and swollen, and what's left
							
							in the bottle she gives him to drink with a special prayer; but not
							
							quite all, for on such occasions she leaves some for herself, and
							
							drinks it herself. And as they never take strong drink, I assure you
							
							they both drop asleep at once and sleep sound a very long time. And
							
							when Grigory Vassilyevitch wakes up he is perfectly well after it, but
							
							Marfa Ignatyevna always has a headache from it. So, if Marfa
							
							Ignatyevna carries out her intention to-morrow, they won't hear
							
							anything and hinder Dmitri Fyodorovitch. They'll be asleep."
							
								"What a rigmarole! And it all seems to happen at once, as though
							
							it were planned. You'll have a fit and they'll both be unconscious,"
							
							cried Ivan. "But aren't you trying to arrange it so?" broke from him
							
							suddenly, and he frowned threateningly.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p47">"How could I?... And why should I, when it all depends on Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch and his plans?... If he means to do anything, he'll do
							
							it; but if not, I shan't be thrusting him upon his father."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p48">"And why should he go to father, especially on the sly, if, as you
							
							say yourself, Agrafena Alexandrovna won't come at all?" Ivan went
							
							on, turning white with anger. "You say that yourself, and all the
							
							while I've been here, I've felt sure it was all the old man's fancy,
							
							and the creature won't come to him. Why should Dmitri break in on
							
							him if she doesn't come? Speak, I want to know what you are thinking!"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p49">"You know yourself why he'll come. What's the use of what I think?
							
							His honour will come simply because he is in a rage or suspicious on
							
							account of my illness perhaps, and he'll dash in, as he did
							
							yesterday through impatience to search the rooms, to see whether she
							
							hasn't escaped him on the sly. He is perfectly well aware, too, that
							
							Fyodor Pavlovitch has a big envelope with three thousand roubles in
							
							it, tied up with ribbon and sealed with three seals. On it is
							
							written in his own hand 'To my angel Grushenka, if she will come,'
							
							to which he added three days later, 'for my little chicken.' There's
							
							no knowing what that might do."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p50">"Nonsense!" cried Ivan, almost beside himself. "Dmitri won't
							
							come to steal money and kill my father to do it. He might have
							
							killed him yesterday on account of Grushenka, like the frantic, savage
							
							fool he is, but he won't steal."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p51">"He is in very great need of money now- the greatest need, Ivan
							
							Fyodorovitch. You don't know in what need he is," Smerdyakov
							
							explained, with perfect composure and remarkable distinctness. "He
							
							looks on that three thousand as his own, too. He said so to me
							
							himself. 'My father still owes me just three thousand,' he said. And
							
							besides that, consider, Ivan Fyodorovitch, there is something else
							
							perfectly true. It's as good as certain, so to say, that Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna will force him, if only she cares to, to marry her- the
							
							master himself, I mean, Fyodor Pavlovitch- if only she cares to, and
							
							of course she may care to. All I've said is that she won't come, but
							
							maybe she's looking for more than that- I mean to be mistress here.
							
							I know myself that Samsonov, her merchant, was laughing with her about
							
							it, telling her quite openly that it would not be at all a stupid
							
							thing to do. And she's got plenty of sense. She wouldn't marry a
							
							beggar like Dmitri Fyodorovitch. So, taking that into consideration,
							
							Ivan Fyodorovitch, reflect that then neither Dmitri Fyodorovitch nor
							
							yourself and your brother, Alexey Fyodorovitch, would have anything
							
							after the master's death, not a rouble, for Agrafena Alexandrovna
							
							would marry him simply to get hold of the whole, all the money there
							
							is. But if your father were to die now, there'd be some forty thousand
							
							for sure, even for Dmitri Fyodorovitch whom he hates so, for he's made
							
							no will.... Dmitri Fyodorovitch knows all that very well."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p52">A sort of shudder passed over Ivan's face. He suddenly flushed.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p53">"Then why on earth," he suddenly interrupted Smerdyakov, "do you
							
							advise me to go to Tchermashnya? What did you mean by that? If I go
							
							away, you see what will happen here." Ivan drew his breath with
							
							difficulty.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p54">"Precisely so," said Smerdyakov, softly and reasonably, watching
							
							Ivan intently, however.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p55">"What do you mean by 'precisely so'?" Ivan questioned him, with
							
							a menacing light in his eyes, restraining himself with difficulty.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p56">"I spoke because I felt sorry for you. If I were in your place I
							
							should simply throw it all up... rather than stay on in such a
							
							position," answered Smerdyakov, with the most candid air looking at
							
							Ivan's flashing eyes. They were both silent.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p57">"You seem to be a perfect idiot, and what's more... an awful
							
							scoundrel, too." Ivan rose suddenly from the bench. He was about to
							
							pass straight through the gate, but he stopped short and turned to
							
							Smerdyakov. Something strange followed. Ivan, in a sudden paroxysm,
							
							bit his lip, clenched his fists, and, in another minute, would have
							
							flung himself on Smerdyakov. The latter, anyway, noticed it at the
							
							same moment, started, and shrank back. But the moment passed without
							
							mischief to Smerdyakov, and Ivan turned in silence, as it seemed in
							
							perplexity, to the gate.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p58">"I am going away to Moscow to-morrow, if you care to know- early
							
							to-morrow morning. That's all!" he suddenly said aloud angrily, and
							
							wondered himself afterwards what need there was to say this then to
							
							Smerdyakov.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p59">"That's the best thing you can do," he responded, as though he had
							
							expected to hear it; "except that you can always be telegraphed for
							
							from Moscow, if anything should happen here."
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p60">Ivan stopped again, and again turned quickly to Smerdyakov. But
							
							a change had passed over him, too. All his familiarity and carelessnes
							
							had completely disappeared. His face expressed attention and
							
							expectation, intent but timid and cringing.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p61">"Haven't you something more to say- something to add?" could be
							
							read in the intent gaze he fixed on Ivan.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p62">"And couldn't I be sent for from Tchermashnya, too- in case
							
							anything happened?" Ivan shouted suddenly, for some unknown reason
							
							raising his voice.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p63">"From Tchermashnya, too... you could be sent for," Smerdyakov
							
							muttered, almost in a whisper, looking disconcerted, but gazing
							
							intently into Ivan's eyes.
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p64">"Only Moscow is farther and Tchermashnya is nearer. Is it to
							
							save my spending money on the fare, or to save my going so far out
							
							of my way, that you insist on Tchermashnya?"
							
								</p><p id="vi_3-p65">"Precisely so..." muttered Smerdyakov, with a breaking voice. He
							
							looked at Ivan with a revolting smile, and again made ready to draw
							
							back. But to his astonishment Ivan broke into a laugh, and went
							
							through the gate still laughing. Anyone who had seen his face at
							
							that moment would have known that he was not laughing from lightness
							
							of heart, and he could not have explained himself what he was
							
							feeling at that instant. He moved and walked as though in a nervous
							
							frenzy.	</p>				
												
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - It's Always Worth While Speaking to a Clever Man" prev="vi_3" next="iii_6" id="vii_3">
					
							<p id="vii_3-p1">AND in the same nervous frenzy, too, he spoke. Meeting Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch in the drawing-room directly he went in, he shouted to him,
							
							waving his hands, "I am going upstairs to my room, not in to you.
							
							Good-bye!" and passed by, trying not even to look at his father.
							
							Very possibly the old man was too hateful to him at that moment; but
							
							such an unceremonious display of hostility was a surprise even to
							
							Fyodor Pavlovitch. And the old man evidently wanted to tell him
							
							something at once and had come to meet him in the drawing-room on
							
							purpose. Receiving this amiable greeting, he stood still in silence
							
							and with an ironical air watched his son going upstairs, till he
							
							passed out of sight.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p2">"What's the matter with him?" he promptly asked Smerdyakov, who
							
							had followed Ivan.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p3">"Angry about something. Who can tell?" the valet muttered
							
							evasively.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p4">"Confound him! Let him be angry then. Bring in the samovar, and
							
							get along with you. Look sharp! No news?"
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p5">Then followed a series of questions such as Smerdyakov had just
							
							complained of to Ivan, all relating to his expected visitor, and these
							
							questions we will omit. Half an hour later the house was locked, and
							
							the crazy old man was wandering along through the rooms in excited
							
							expectation of hearing every minute the five knocks agreed upon. Now
							
							and then he peered out into the darkness, seeing nothing.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p6">It was very late, but Ivan was still awake and reflecting. He
							
							sat up late that night, till two o'clock. But we will not give an
							
							account of his thoughts, and this is not the place to look into that
							
							soul- its turn will come. And even if one tried, it would be very hard
							
							to give an account of them, for there were no thoughts in his brain,
							
							but something very vague, and, above all, intense excitement. He
							
							felt himself that he had lost his bearings. He was fretted, too, by
							
							all sorts of strange and almost surprising desires; for instance,
							
							after midnight he suddenly had an intense irresistible inclination
							
							to go down, open the door, go to the lodge and beat Smerdyakov. But if
							
							he had been asked why, he could not have given any exact reason,
							
							except perhaps that he loathed the valet as one who had insulted him
							
							more gravely than anyone in the world. On the other hand, he was
							
							more than once that night overcome by a sort of inexplicable
							
							humiliating terror, which he felt positively paralysed his physical
							
							powers. His head ached and he was giddy. A feeling of hatred was
							
							rankling in his heart, as though he meant to avenge himself on
							
							someone. He even hated Alyosha, recalling the conversation he had just
							
							had with him. At moments he hated himself intensely. Of Katerina
							
							Ivanovna he almost forgot to think, and wondered greatly at this
							
							afterwards, especially as he remembered perfectly that when he had
							
							protested so valiantly to Katerina Ivanovna that he would go away next
							
							day to Moscow, something had whispered in his heart, "That's nonsense,
							
							you are not going, and it won't be so easy to tear yourself away as
							
							you are boasting now."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p7">Remembering that night long afterwards, Ivan recalled with
							
							peculiar repulsion how he had suddenly got up from the sofa and had
							
							stealthily, as though he were afraid of being watched, opened the
							
							door, gone out on the staircase and listened to Fyodor Pavlovitch
							
							stirring down below, had listened a long while- some five minutes-
							
							with a sort of strange curiosity, holding his breath while his heart
							
							throbbed. And why he had done all this, why he was listening, he could
							
							not have said. That "action" all his life afterwards he called
							
							"infamous," and at the bottom of his heart, he thought of it as the
							
							basest action of his life. For Fyodor Pavlovitch himself he felt no
							
							hatred at that moment, but was simply intensely curious to know how he
							
							was walking down there below and what he must be doing now. He
							
							wondered and imagined how he must be peeping out of the dark windows
							
							and stopping in the middle of the room, listening, listening- for
							
							someone to knock. Ivan went out on the stairs twice to listen like
							
							this.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p8">About two o'clock when everything was quiet, and even Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch had gone to bed, Ivan had got into bed, firmly resolved
							
							to fall asleep at once, as he felt fearfully exhausted. And he did
							
							fall asleep at once, and slept soundly without dreams, but waked
							
							early, at seven o'clock, when it was broad daylight. Opening his eyes,
							
							he was surprised to feel himself extraordinarily vigorous. He jumped
							
							up at once and dressed quickly; then dragged out his trunk and began
							
							packing immediately. His linen had come back from the laundress the
							
							previous morning. Ivan positively smiled at the thought that
							
							everything was helping his sudden departure. And his departure
							
							certainly was sudden. Though Ivan had said the day before (to Katerina
							
							Ivanovna, Alyosha, and Smerdyakov) that he was leaving next day, yet
							
							he remembered that he had no thought of departure when he went to bed,
							
							or, at least, had not dreamed that his first act in the morning
							
							would be to pack his trunk. At last his trunk and bag were ready. It
							
							was about nine o'clock when Marfa Ignatyevna came in with her usual
							
							inquiry, "Where will your honour take your tea, in your own room or
							
							downstairs?" He looked almost cheerful, but there was about him, about
							
							his words and gestures, something hurried and scattered. Greeting
							
							his father affably, and even inquiring specially after his health,
							
							though he did not wait to hear his answer to the end, he announced
							
							that he was starting off in an hour to return to Moscow for good,
							
							and begged him to send for the horses. His father heard this
							
							announcement with no sign of surprise, and forgot in an unmannerly way
							
							to show regret at losing him. Instead of doing so, he flew into a
							
							great flutter at the recollection of some important business of his
							
							own.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p9">"What a fellow you are! Not to tell me yesterday! Never mind;
							
							we'll manage it all the same. Do me a great service, my dear boy. Go
							
							to Tchermashnya on the way. It's only to turn to the left from the
							
							station at Volovya, only another twelve versts and you come to
							
							Tchermashnya."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p10">"I'm sorry, I can't. It's eighty versts to the railway and the
							
							train starts for Moscow at seven o'clock to-night. I can only just
							
							catch it."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p11">"You'll catch it to-morrow or the day after, but to-day turn off
							
							to Tchermashnya. It won't put you out much to humour your father! If I
							
							hadn't had something to keep me here, I would have run over myself
							
							long ago, for I've some business there in a hurry. But here I...
							
							it's not the time for me to go now.... You see, I've two pieces of
							
							copse land there. The Maslovs, an old merchant and his son, will
							
							give eight thousand for the timber. But last year I just missed a
							
							purchaser who would have given twelve. There's no getting anyone about
							
							here to buy it. The Maslovs have it all their own way. One has to take
							
							what they'll give, for no one here dare bid against them. The priest
							
							at Ilyinskoe wrote to me last Thursday that a merchant called
							
							Gorstkin, a man I know, had turned up. What makes him valuable is that
							
							he is not from these parts, so he is not afraid of the Maslovs. He
							
							says he will give me eleven thousand for the copse. Do you hear? But
							
							he'll only be here, the priest writes, for a week altogether, so you
							
							must go at once and make a bargain with him."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p12">"Well, you write to the priest; he'll make the bargain."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p13">"He can't do it. He has no eye for business. He is a perfect
							
							treasure, I'd give him twenty thousand to take care of for me
							
							without a receipt; but he has no eye for business, he is a perfect
							
							child, a crow could deceive him. And yet he is a learned man, would
							
							you believe it? This Gorstkin looks like a peasant, he wears a blue
							
							kaftan, but he is a regular rogue. That's the common complaint. He
							
							is a liar. Sometimes he tells such lies that you wonder why he is
							
							doing it. He told me the year before last that his wife was dead and
							
							that he had married another, and would you believe it, there was not a
							
							word of truth in it? His wife has never died at all, she is alive to
							
							this day and gives him a beating twice a week. So what you have to
							
							find out is whether he is lying or speaking the truth when he says
							
							he wants to buy it and would give eleven thousand."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p14">"I shall be no use in such a business. I have no eye either."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p15">"Stay, wait a bit! You will be of use, for I will tell you the
							
							signs by which you can judge about Gorstkin. I've done business with
							
							him a long time. You see, you must watch his beard; he has a nasty,
							
							thin, red beard. If his beard shakes when he talks and he gets
							
							cross, it's all right, he is saying what he means, he wants to do
							
							business. But if he strokes his beard with his left hand and grins- he
							
							is trying to cheat you. Don't watch his eyes, you won't find out
							
							anything from his eyes, he is a deep one, a rogue but watch his beard!
							
							I'll give you a note and you show it to him. He's called Gorstkin,
							
							though his real name is Lyagavy;* but don't call him so, he will be
							
							offended. If you come to an understanding with him, and see it's all
							
							right, write here at once. You need only write: 'He's not lying.'
							
							Stand out for eleven thousand; one thousand you can knock off, but not
							
							more. just think! there's a difference between eight thousand and
							
							eleven thousand. It's as good as picking up three thousand; it's not
							
							so easy to find a purchaser, and I'm in desperate need of money.
							
							Only let me know it's serious, and I'll run over and fix it up. I'll
							
							snatch the time somehow. But what's the good of my galloping over,
							
							if it's all a notion of the priest's? Come, will you go?"
							
							
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p16">* i.e. setter dog.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p17">"Oh, I can't spare the time. You must excuse me."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p18">"Come, you might oblige your father. I shan't forget it. You've no
							
							heart, any of you that's what it is! What's a day or two to you? Where
							
							are you going now- to Venice? Your Venice will keep another two
							
							days. I would have sent Alyosha, but what use is Alyosha in a thing
							
							like that? I send you just because you are a clever fellow. Do you
							
							suppose I don't see that? You know nothing about timber, but you've
							
							got an eye. All that is wanted is to see whether the man is in
							
							earnest. I tell you, watch his beard- if his beard shakes you know
							
							he is in earnest."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p19">"You force me to go to that damned Tchermashnya yourself, then?"
							
							cried Ivan, with a malignant smile.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p20">Fyodor Pavlovitch did not catch, or would not catch, the
							
							malignancy, but he caught the smile.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p21">"Then you'll go, you'll go? I'll scribble the note for you at
							
							once."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p22">"I don't know whether I shall go. I don't know. I'll decide on the
							
							way."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p23">"Nonsense! Decide at once. My dear fellow, decide! If you settle
							
							the matter, write me a line; give it to the priest and he'll send it
							
							on to me at once. And I won't delay you more than that. You can go
							
							to Venice. The priest will give you horses back to Volovya station."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p24">The old man was quite delighted. He wrote the note, and sent for
							
							the horses. A light lunch was brought in, with brandy. When Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch was pleased, he usually became expansive, but to-day he
							
							seemed to restrain himself. Of Dmitri, for instance, he did not say
							
							a word. He was quite unmoved by the parting, and seemed, in fact, at a
							
							loss for something to say. Ivan noticed this particularly. "He must be
							
							bored with me," he thought. Only when accompanying his son out on to
							
							the steps, the old man began to fuss about. He would have kissed
							
							him, but Ivan made haste to hold out his hand, obviously avoiding
							
							the kiss. His father saw it at once, and instantly pulled himself up.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p25">"Well, good luck to you, good luck to you!" he repeated from the
							
							steps. "You'll come again some time or other? Mind you do come. I
							
							shall always be glad to see you. Well, Christ be with you!"
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p26">Ivan got into the carriage.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p27">"Good-bye, Ivan! Don't be too hard on me!" the father called for
							
							the last time.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p28">The whole household came out to take leave- Smerdyakov, Marfa
							
							and Grigory. Ivan gave them ten roubles each. When he had seated
							
							himself in the carriage, Smerdyakov jumped up to arrange the rug.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p29">"You see... I am going to Tchermashnya," broke suddenly from Ivan.
							
							Again, as the day before, the words seemed to drop of themselves,
							
							and he laughed, too, a peculiar, nervous laugh. He remembered it
							
							long after.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p30">"It's a true saying then, that 'it's always worth while speaking
							
							to a clever man,'" answered Smerdyakov firmly, looking significantly
							
							at Ivan.
							
							</p><p id="vii_3-p31"> The carriage rolled away. Nothing was clear in Ivan's soul, but he
							
							looked eagerly around him at the fields, at the hills, at the trees,
							
							at a flock of geese flying high overhead in the bright sky. And all of
							
							a sudden he felt very happy. He tried to talk to the driver, and he
							
							felt intensely interested in an answer the peasant made him; but a
							
							minute later he realised that he was not catching anything, and that
							
							he had not really even taken in the peasant's answer. He was silent,
							
							and it was pleasant even so. The air was pure and cool, sky bright.
							
							The images of Alyosha and Katerina Ivanovna floated into his mind. But
							
							he softly smiled, blew softly on the friendly phantoms, and they
							
							flew away. "There's plenty of time for them," he thought. They reached
							
							the station quickly, changed horses, and galloped to Volovya "Why is
							
							it worth while speaking to a clever man? What did he mean by that?"
							
							The thought seemed suddenly to clutch at his breathing. "And why did I
							
							tell him I was going to Tchermashnya?" They reached Volovya station.
							
							Ivan got out of the carriage, and the drivers stood round him
							
							bargaining over the journey of twelve versts to Tchermashnya. He
							
							told them to harness the horses. He went into the station house,
							
							looked round, glanced at the overseer's wife, and suddenly went back
							
							to the entrance.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p32">"I won't go to Tchermashnya. Am I too late to reach the railway by
							
							seven, brothers?"
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p33">"We shall just do it. Shall we get the carriage out?"
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p34">"At once. Will any one of you be going to the town to-morrow?"
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p35">"To be sure. Mitri here will."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p36">"Can you do me a service, Mitri? Go to my father's, to Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch Karamazov, and tell him I haven't gone to Tchermashnya. Can
							
							you?"
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p37">"Of course I can. I've known Fyodor Pavlovitch a long time."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p38">"And here's something for you, for I dare say he won't give you
							
							anything," said Ivan, laughing gaily.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p39">"You may depend on it he won't." Mitri laughed too. "Thank you,
							
							sir. I'll be sure to do it."
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p40">At seven o'clock Ivan got into the train and set off to Moscow.
							
							"Away with the past. I've done with the old world for ever, and may
							
							I have no news, no echo, from it. To a new life, new places, and no
							
							looking back!" But instead of delight his soul was filled with such
							
							gloom, and his heart ached with such anguish, as he had never known in
							
							his life before. He was thinking all the night. The train flew on, and
							
							only at daybreak, when he was approaching Moscow, he suddenly roused
							
							himself from his meditation.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p41">"I am a scoundrel," he whispered to himself.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p42">Fyodor Pavlovitch remained well satisfied at having seen his son
							
							off. For two hours afterwards he felt almost happy, and sat drinking
							
							brandy. But suddenly something happened which was very annoying and
							
							unpleasant for everyone in the house, and completely upset Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch's equanimity at once. Smerdyakov went to the cellar for
							
							something and fell down from the top of the steps. Fortunately,
							
							Marfa Ignatyevna was in the yard and heard him in time. She did not
							
							see the fall, but heard his scream- the strange, peculiar scream, long
							
							familiar to her- the scream of the epileptic falling in a fit. They
							
							could not tell whether the fit had come on him at the moment he was
							
							decending the steps, so that he must have fallen unconscious, or
							
							whether it was the fall and the shock that had caused the fit in
							
							Smerdyakov, who was known to be liable to them. They found him at
							
							the bottom of the cellar steps, writhing in convulsions and foaming at
							
							the mouth. It was thought at first that he must have broken something-
							
							an arm or a leg- and hurt himself, but "God had preserved him," as
							
							Marfa Ignatyevna expressed it- nothing of the kind had happened. But
							
							it was difficult to get him out of the cellar. They asked the
							
							neighbours to help and managed it somehow. Fyodor Pavlovitch himself
							
							was present at the whole ceremony. He helped, evidently alarmed and
							
							upset. The sick man did not regain consciousness; the convulsions
							
							ceased for a time, but then began again, and everyone concluded that
							
							the same thing would happen, as had happened a year before, when he
							
							accidently fell from the garret. They remembered that ice been put
							
							on his head then. There was still ice in the cellar, and Marfa
							
							Ignatyevna had some brought up. In the evening, Fyodor Pavlovitch sent
							
							for Doctor Herzenstube, who arrived at once. He was a most estimable
							
							old man, and the most careful and conscientious doctor in the
							
							province. After careful examination, he concluded that the fit was a
							
							very violent one and might have serious consequences; that meanwhile
							
							he, Herzenstube, did not fully understand it, but that by to-morrow
							
							morning, if the present remedies were unavailing, he would venture
							
							to try something else. The invalid was taken to the lodge, to a room
							
							next to Grigory's and Marfa Ignatyevna's.
							
								</p><p id="vii_3-p43">Then Fyodor Pavlovitch had one misfortune after another to put
							
							up with that day. Marfa Ignatyevna cooked the dinner, and the soup,
							
							compared with Smerdyakov's, was "no better than dish-water," and the
							
							fowl was so dried up that it was impossible to masticate it. To her
							
							master's bitter, though deserved, reproaches, Marfa Ignatyevna replied
							
							that the fowl was a very old one to begin with, and that she had never
							
							been trained as a cook. In the evening there was another trouble in
							
							store for Fyodor Pavlovitch; he was informed that Grigory, who had not
							
							been well for the last three days, was completely laid up by his
							
							lumbago. Fyodor Pavlovitch finished his tea as early as possible and
							
							locked himself up alone in the house. He was in terrible excitement
							
							and suspense. That evening he reckoned on Grushenka's coming almost as
							
							a certainty. He had received from Smerdyakov that morning an assurance
							
							"that she had promised to come without fail." The incorrigible old
							
							man's heart throbbed with excitement; he paced up and down his empty
							
							rooms listening. He had to be on the alert. Dmitri might be on the
							
							watch for her somewhere, and when she knocked on the window
							
							(Smerdyakov had informed him two days before that he had told her
							
							where and how to knock) the door must be opened at once. She must
							
							not be a second in the passage, for fear which God forbid!- that she
							
							should be frightened and run away. Fyodor Pavlovitch had much to think
							
							of, but never had his heart been steeped in such voluptuous hopes.
							
							This time he could say almost certainly that she would come!	</p>				
					
					</div4>  			
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book VI - The Russian Monk" prev="vii_3" next="i_9" id="iii_6">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - Father Zossima and His Visitors" prev="iii_6" next="ii_8" id="i_9">
					
							<p id="i_9-p1">WHEN with an anxious and aching heart Alyosha went into his
							
							elder's cell, he stood still almost astonished. Instead of a sick
							
							man at his last gasp, perhaps unconscious, as he had feared to find
							
							him, he saw him sitting up in his chair and, though weak and
							
							exhausted, his face was bright and cheerful, he was surrounded by
							
							visitors and engaged in a quiet and joyful conversation. But he had
							
							only got up from his bed a quarter of an hour before Alyosha's
							
							arrival; his visitors had gathered together in his cell earlier,
							
							waiting for him to wake, having received a most confident assurance
							
							from Father Paissy that "the teacher would get up, and as he had
							
							himself promised in the morning, converse once more with those dear to
							
							his heart." This promise and indeed every word of the dying elder
							
							Father Paissy put implicit trust in. If he had seen him unconscious,
							
							if he had seen him breathe his last, and yet had his promise that he
							
							would rise up and say good-bye to him, he would not have believed
							
							perhaps even in death, but would still have expected the dead man to
							
							recover and fulfil his promise. In the morning as he lay down to
							
							sleep, Father Zossima had told him positively: "I shall not die
							
							without the delight of another conversation with you, beloved of my
							
							heart. I shall look once more on your dear face and pour out my
							
							heart to you once again." The monks, who had gathered for this
							
							probably last conversation with Father Zossima, had all been his
							
							devoted friends for many years. There were four of them: Father
							
							Iosif and Father Paissy, Father Mihail the warden of the hermitage,
							
							a man not very old and far from being learned. He was of humble
							
							origin, of strong will and steadfast faith, of austere appearance, but
							
							of deep tenderness, though he obviously concealed it as though he were
							
							almost ashamed of it. The fourth, Father Anfim, was a very old and
							
							humble little monk of the poorest peasant class. He was almost
							
							illiterate, and very quiet, scarcely speaking to anyone. He was the
							
							humblest of the humble, and looked as though he had been frightened by
							
							something great and awful beyond the scope of his intelligence. Father
							
							Zossima had a great affection for this timorous man, and always
							
							treated him with marked respect, though perhaps there was no one he
							
							had known to whom he had said less, in spite of the fact that he had
							
							spent years wandering about holy Russia with him. That was very long
							
							ago, forty years before, when Father Zossima first began his life as a
							
							monk in a poor and little monastery at Kostroma, and when, shortly
							
							after, he had accompanied Father Anfim on his pilgrimage to collect
							
							alms for their poor monastery.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p2">The whole party were in the bedroom which, as we mentioned before,
							
							was very small, so that there was scarcely room for the four of them
							
							(in addition to Porfiry, the novice, who stood) to sit round Father
							
							Zossima on chairs brought from the sitting room. It was already
							
							beginning to get dark, the room was lighted up by the lamps and the
							
							candles before the ikons.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p3">Seeing Alyosha standing embarrassed in the doorway, Father Zossima
							
							smiled at him joyfully and held out his hand.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p4">"Welcome, my quiet one, welcome, my dear, here you are too. I knew
							
							you would come."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p5">Alyosha went up to him, bowed down before him to the ground and
							
							wept. Something surged up from his heart, his soul was quivering, he
							
							wanted to sob.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p6">"Come, don't weep over me yet," Father Zossima smiled, laying
							
							his right hand on his head. "You see I am sitting up talking; maybe
							
							I shall live another twenty years yet, as that dear good woman from
							
							Vishegorye, with her little Lizaveta in her arms, wished me yesterday.
							
							God bless the mother and the little girl Lizaveta," he crossed
							
							himself. "Porfiry, did you take her offering where I told you?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p7">He meant the sixty copecks brought him the day before by the
							
							good-humoured woman to be given "to someone poorer than me." Such
							
							offerings, always of money gained by personal toil, are made by way of
							
							penance voluntarily undertaken. The elder had sent Porfiry the evening
							
							before to a widow, whose house had been burnt down lately, and who
							
							after the fire had gone with her children begging alms. Porfiry
							
							hastened to reply that he had given the money, as he had been
							
							instructed, "from an unknown benefactress."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p8">"Get up, my dear boy," the elder went on to Alyosha. "Let me
							
							look at you. Have you been home and seen your brother?" It seemed
							
							strange to Alyosha that he asked so confidently and precisely, about
							
							one of his brothers only- but which one? Then perhaps he had sent
							
							him out both yesterday and to-day for the sake of that brother.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p9">"I have seen one of my brothers," answered Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p10">"I mean the elder one, to whom I bowed down."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p11">"I only saw him yesterday and could not find him to-day," said
							
							Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p12">"Make haste to find him, go again to-morrow and make haste,
							
							leave everything and make haste. Perhaps you may still have time to
							
							prevent something terrible. I bowed down yesterday to the great
							
							suffering in store for him."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p13">He was suddenly silent and seemed to be pondering. The words
							
							were strange. Father Iosif, who had witnessed the scene yesterday,
							
							exchanged glances with Father Paissy. Alyosha could not resist asking:
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p14">"Father and teacher," he began with extreme emotion, "your words
							
							are too obscure.... What is this suffering in store for him?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p15">"Don't inquire. I seemed to see something terrible yesterday... as
							
							though his whole future were expressed in his eyes. A look came into
							
							his eyes- so that I was instantly horror-stricken at what that man
							
							is preparing for himself. Once or twice in my life I've seen such a
							
							look in a man's face... reflecting as it were his future fate, and
							
							that fate, alas, came to pass. I sent you to him, Alexey, for I
							
							thought your brotherly face would help him. But everything and all our
							
							fates are from the Lord. 'Except a corn of wheat fall into the
							
							ground and die, it abideth alone; but if it die, it bringeth forth
							
							much fruit.' Remember that. You, Alexey, I've many times silently
							
							blessed for your face, know that," added the elder with a gentle
							
							smile. "This is what I think of you, you will go forth from these
							
							walls, but will live like a monk in the world. You will have many
							
							enemies, but even your foes will love you. Life will bring you many
							
							misfortunes, but you will find your happiness in them, and will
							
							bless life and will make others bless it- which is what matters
							
							most. Well, that is your character. Fathers and teachers," he
							
							addressed his friends with a tender smile, "I have never till to-day
							
							told even him why the face of this youth is so dear to me. Now I
							
							will tell you. His face has been as it were a remembrance and a
							
							prophecy for me. At the dawn of my life when I was a child I had an
							
							elder brother who died before my eyes at seventeen. And later on in
							
							the course of my life I gradually became convinced that that brother
							
							had been for a guidance and a sign from on high for me. For had he not
							
							come into my life, I should never perhaps, so I fancy at least, have
							
							become a monk and entered on this precious path. He appeared first
							
							to me in my childhood, and here, at the end of my pilgrimage, he seems
							
							to have come to me over again. It is marvellous, fathers and teachers,
							
							that Alexey, who has some, though not a great, resemblance in face,
							
							seems to me so like him spiritually, that many times I have taken
							
							him for that young man, my brother, mysteriously come back to me at
							
							the end of my pilgrimage, as a reminder and an inspiration. So that
							
							I positively wondered at so strange a dream in myself. Do you hear
							
							this, Porfiry?" he turned to the novice who waited on him. "Many times
							
							I've seen in your face as it were a look of mortification that I
							
							love Alexey more than you. Now you know why that was so, but I love
							
							you too, know that, and many times I grieved at your mortification.
							
							I should like to tell you, dear friends, of that youth, my brother,
							
							for there has been no presence in my life more precious, more
							
							significant and touching. My heart is full of tenderness, and I look
							
							at my whole life at this moment as though living through it again."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p16">Here I must observe that this last conversation of Father
							
							Zossima with the friends who visited him on the last day of his life
							
							has been partly preserved in writing. Alexey Fyodorovitch Karamazov
							
							wrote it down from memory, some time after his elder's death. But
							
							whether this was only the conversation that took place then, or
							
							whether he added to it his notes of parts of former conversations with
							
							his teacher, I cannot determine. In his account, Father Zossima's talk
							
							goes on without interruption, as though he told his life to his
							
							friends in the form of a story, though there is no doubt, from other
							
							accounts of it, that the conversation that evening was general. Though
							
							the guests did not interrupt Father Zossima much, yet they too talked,
							
							perhaps even told something themselves. Besides, Father Zossima
							
							could not have carried on an uninterrupted narrative, for he was
							
							sometimes gasping for breath, his voice failed him, and he even lay
							
							down to rest on his bed, though he did not fall asleep and his
							
							visitors did not leave their seats. Once or twice the conversation was
							
							interrupted by Father Paissy's reading the Gospel. It is worthy of
							
							note, too, that no one of them supposed that he would die that
							
							night, for on that evening of his life after his deep sleep in the day
							
							he seemed suddenly to have found new strength, which kept him up
							
							through this long conversation. It was like a last effort of love
							
							which gave him marvellous energy; only for a little time, however, for
							
							his life was cut short immediately.. But of that later. I will only
							
							add now that I have preferred to confine myself to the account given
							
							by Alexey Fyodorovitch Karamazov. It will be shorter and not so
							
							fatiguing, though, of course, as I must repeat, Alyosha took a great
							
							deal from previous conversations and added them to it.
							
							
							
							</p><p id="i_9-p17">Notes of the Life of the deceased Priest and Monk, the Elder
							
							Zossima, taken from his own words by Alexey Fyodorovitch Karamazov.</p><p id="i_9-p18" /><p id="i_9-p19" />
							
							
							
													  <p class="center" id="i_9-p20">BIOGRAPHICAL NOTES</p>
							
												<p class="center" id="i_9-p21">(a) Father Zossima's Brother.</p><p id="i_9-p22" /><p id="i_9-p23">
							
							
							
								Beloved fathers and teachers, I was born in a distant province
							
							in the north, in the town of V. My father was a gentleman by birth,
							
							but of no great consequence or position. He died when I was only two
							
							years old, and I don't remember him at all. He left my mother a
							
							small house built of wood, and a fortune, not large, but sufficient to
							
							keep her and her children in comfort. There were two of us, my elder
							
							brother Markel and I. He was eight years older than I was, of hasty,
							
							irritable temperament, but kind-hearted and never ironical. He was
							
							remarkably silent, especially at home with me, his mother, and the
							
							servants. He did well at school, but did not get on with his
							
							school-fellows, though he never quarrelled, at least so my mother
							
							has told me. Six months before his death, when he was seventeen, he
							
							made friends with a political exile who had been banished from
							
							Moscow to our town for freethinking, and led a solitary existence
							
							there. He was a good scholar who had gained distinction in
							
							philosophy in the university. Something made him take a fancy to
							
							Markel, and he used to ask him to see him. The young man would spend
							
							whole evenings with him during that winter, till the exile was
							
							summoned to Petersburg to take up his post again at his own request,
							
							as he had powerful friends.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p24">It was the beginning of Lent, and Markel would not fast, he was
							
							rude and laughed at it. "That's all silly twaddle, and there is no
							
							God," he said, horrifying my mother, the servants, and me too. For
							
							though I was only nine, I too was aghast at hearing such words. We had
							
							four servants, all serfs. I remember my mother selling one of the
							
							four, the cook Afimya, who was lame and elderly, for sixty paper
							
							roubles, and hiring a free servant to take her place.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p25">In the sixth week in Lent, my brother, who was never strong and
							
							had a tendency to consumption, was taken ill. He was tall but thin and
							
							delicate-looking, and of very pleasing countenance. I suppose he
							
							caught cold, anyway the doctor, who came, soon whispered to my
							
							mother that it was galloping consumption, that he would not live
							
							through the spring. My mother began weeping, and, careful not to alarm
							
							my brother, she entreated him to go to church, to confess and take the
							
							sacrament, as he was still able to move about. This made him angry,
							
							and he said something profane about the church. He grew thoughtful,
							
							however; he guessed at once that he was seriously ill, and that that
							
							was why his mother was begging him to confess and take the
							
							sacrament. He had been aware, indeed, for a long time past, that he
							
							was far from well, and had a year before coolly observed at dinner
							
							to your mother and me, "My life won't be long among you, I may not
							
							live another year," which seemed now like a prophecy.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p26">Three days passed and Holy Week had come. And on Tuesday morning
							
							my brother began going to church. "I am doing this simply for your
							
							sake, mother, to please and comfort you," he said. My mother wept with
							
							joy and grief. "His end must be near," she thought, "if there's such a
							
							change in him." But he was not able to go to church long, he took to
							
							his bed, so he had to confess and take the sacrament at home.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p27">It was a late Easter, and the days were bright, fine, and full
							
							of fragrance. I remember he used to cough all night and sleep badly,
							
							but in the morning he dressed and tried to sit up in an arm-chair.
							
							That's how I remember him sitting, sweet and gentle, smiling, his face
							
							bright and joyous, in spite of his illness. A marvellous change passed
							
							over him, his spirit seemed transformed. The old nurse would come in
							
							and say, "Let me light the lamp before the holy image, my dear." And
							
							once he would not have allowed it and would have blown it out.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p28">"Light it, light it, dear, I was a wretch to have prevented you
							
							doing it. You are praying when you light the lamp, and I am praying
							
							when I rejoice seeing you. So we are praying to the same God."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p29">Those words seemed strange to us, and mother would go to her
							
							room and weep, but when she went in to him she wiped her eyes and
							
							looked cheerful. "Mother, don't weep, darling," he would say, "I've
							
							long to live yet, long to rejoice with you, and life is glad and
							
							joyful."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p30">"Ah, dear boy, how can you talk of joy when you lie feverish at
							
							night, coughing as though you would tear yourself to pieces."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p31">"Don't cry, mother," he would answer, "life is paradise, and we
							
							are all in paradise, but we won't see it; if we would, we should
							
							have heaven on earth the next day."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p32">Everyone wondered at his words, he spoke so strangely and
							
							positively; we were all touched and wept. Friends came to see us.
							
							"Dear ones," he would say to them, "what have I done that you should
							
							love me so, how can you love anyone like me, and how was it I did
							
							not know, I did not appreciate it before?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p33">When the servants came in to him he would say continually,
							
							"Dear, kind people, why are you doing so much for me, do I deserve
							
							to be waited on? If it were God's will for me to live, I would wait on
							
							you, for all men should wait on one another."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p34">Mother shook her head as she listened. "My darling, it's your
							
							illness makes you talk like that."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p35">"Mother darling," he would say, "there must be servants and
							
							masters, but if so I will be the servant of my servants, the same as
							
							they are to me. And another thing, mother, every one of us has
							
							sinned against all men, and I more than any."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p36">Mother positively smiled at that, smiled through her tears.
							
							"Why, how could you have sinned against all men, more than all?
							
							Robbers and murderers have done that, but what sin have you
							
							committed yet, that you hold yourself more guilty than all?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p37">"Mother, little heart of mine," he said (he had begun using such
							
							strange caressing words at that time), "little heart of mine, my
							
							joy, believe me, everyone is really responsible to all men for all men
							
							and for everything. I don't know how to explain it to you, but I
							
							feel it is so, painfully even. And how is it we went on then living,
							
							getting angry and not knowing?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p38">So he would get up every day, more and more sweet and joyous and
							
							full of love. When the doctor, an old German called Eisenschmidt,
							
							came:
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p39">"Well, doctor, have I another day in this world?" he would ask,
							
							joking.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p40">"You'll live many days yet," the doctor would answer, "and
							
							months and years too."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p41">"Months and years!" he would exclaim. "Why reckon the days? One
							
							day is enough for a man to know all happiness. My dear ones, why do we
							
							quarrel, try to outshine each other and keep grudges against each
							
							other? Let's go straight into the garden, walk and play there, love,
							
							appreciate, and kiss each other, and glorify life."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p42">"Your son cannot last long," the doctor told my mother, as she
							
							accompanied him the door. "The disease is affecting his brain."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p43">The windows of his room looked out into the garden, and our garden
							
							was a shady one, with old trees in it which were coming into bud.
							
							The first birds of spring were flitting in the branches, chirruping
							
							and singing at the windows. And looking at them and admiring them,
							
							he began suddenly begging their forgiveness too: "Birds of heaven,
							
							happy birds, forgive me, for I have sinned against you too." None of
							
							us could understand that at the time, but he shed tears of joy. "Yes,"
							
							he said, "there was such a glory of God all about me: birds, trees,
							
							meadows, sky; only I lived in shame and dishonoured it all and did not
							
							notice the beauty and glory."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p44">"You take too many sins on yourself," mother used to say, weeping.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p45">"Mother, darling, it's for joy, not for grief I am crying.
							
							Though I can't explain it to you, I like to humble myself before them,
							
							for I don't know how to love them enough. If I have sinned against
							
							everyone, yet all forgive me, too, and that's heaven. Am I not in
							
							heaven now?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p46">And there was a great deal more I don't remember. I remember I
							
							went once into his room when there was no one else there. It was a
							
							bright evening, the sun was setting, and the whole room was lighted
							
							up. He beckoned me, and I went up to him. He put his hands on my
							
							shoulders and looked into my face tenderly, lovingly; he said
							
							nothing for a minute, only looked at me like that.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p47">"Well," he said, "run and play now, enjoy life for me too."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p48">I went out then and ran to play. And many times in my life
							
							afterwards I remembered even with tears how he told me to enjoy life
							
							for him too. There were many other marvellous and beautiful sayings of
							
							his, though we did not understand them at the time. He died the
							
							third week after Easter. He was fully conscious though he could not
							
							talk; up to his last hour he did not change. He looked happy, his eyes
							
							beamed and sought us, he smiled at us, beckoned us. There was a
							
							great deal of talk even in the town about his death. I was impressed
							
							by all this at the time, but not too much so, though I cried a good
							
							deal at his funeral. I was young then, a child, but a lasting
							
							impression, a hidden feeling of it all, remained in my heart, ready to
							
							rise up and respond when the time came. So indeed it happened.</p><p id="i_9-p49" /><p id="i_9-p50" />
							
							
							
								  <p class="center" id="i_9-p51">(b) Of the Holy Scriptures in the Life of Father Zossima.</p><p id="i_9-p52" /><p id="i_9-p53">
							
							
							
								I was left alone with my mother. Her friends began advising her to
							
							send me to Petersburg as other parents did. "You have only one son
							
							now," they said, "and have a fair income, and you will be depriving
							
							him perhaps of a brilliant career if you keep him here." They
							
							suggested I should be sent to Petersburg to the Cadet Corps, that I
							
							might afterwards enter the Imperial Guard. My mother hesitated for a
							
							long time, it was awful to part with her only child, but she made up
							
							her mind to it at last, though not without many tears, believing she
							
							was acting for my happiness. She brought me to Petersburg and put me
							
							into the Cadet Corps, and I never saw her again. For she too died
							
							three years afterwards. She spent those three years mourning and
							
							grieving for both of us.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p54">From the house of my childhood I have brought nothing but precious
							
							memories, for there are no memories more precious than those of
							
							early childhood in one's first home. And that is almost always so if
							
							there is any love and harmony in the family at all. Indeed, precious
							
							memories may remain even of a bad home, if only the heart knows how to
							
							find what is precious. With my memories of home I count, too, my
							
							memories of the Bible, which, child as I was, I was very eager to read
							
							at home. I had a book of Scripture history then with excellent
							
							pictures, called A Hundred and Four Stories from the Old and New
							
							Testament, and I learned to read from it. I have it lying on my
							
							shelf now; I keep it as a precious relic of the past. But even
							
							before I learned to read, I remember first being moved to devotional
							
							feeling at eight years old. My mother took me alone to mass (I don't
							
							remember where my brother was at the time) on the Monday before
							
							Easter. It was a fine day, and I remember to-day, as though I saw it
							
							now, how the incense rose from the censer and softly floated upwards
							
							and, overhead in the cupola, mingled in rising waves with the sunlight
							
							that streamed in at the little window. I was stirred by the sight, and
							
							for the first time in my life I consciously received the seed of God's
							
							word in my heart. A youth came out into the middle of the church
							
							carrying a big book, so large that at the time I fancied he could
							
							scarcely carry it. He laid it on the reading desk, opened it, and
							
							began reading, and suddenly for the first time I understood
							
							something read in the church of God. In the land of Uz, there lived
							
							a man, righteous and God-fearing, and he had great wealth, so many
							
							camels, so many sheep and asses, and his children feasted, and he
							
							loved them very much and prayed for them. "It may be that my sons have
							
							sinned in their feasting." Now the devil came before the Lord together
							
							with the sons of God, and said to the Lord that he had gone up and
							
							down the earth and under the earth. "And hast thou considered my
							
							servant Job?" God asked of him. And God boasted to the devil, pointing
							
							to His great and holy servant. And the devil laughed at God's words.
							
							"Give him over to me and Thou wilt see that Thy servant will murmur
							
							against Thee and curse Thy name." And God gave up the just man He
							
							loved so, to the devil. And the devil smote his children and his
							
							cattle and scattered his wealth, all of a sudden like a thunderbolt
							
							from heaven. And Job rent his mantle and fell down upon the ground and
							
							cried aloud, "Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall
							
							I return into the earth; the Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.
							
							Blessed be the name of the Lord for ever and ever."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p55">Fathers and teachers, forgive my tears now, for all my childhood
							
							rises up again before me, and I breathe now as I breathed then, with
							
							the breast of a little child of eight, and I feel as I did then, awe
							
							and wonder and gladness. The camels at that time caught my
							
							imagination, and Satan, who talked like that with God, and God who
							
							gave His servant up to destruction, and His servant crying out:
							
							"Blessed be Thy name although Thou dost punish me," and then the
							
							soft and sweet singing in the church: "Let my prayer rise up before
							
							Thee," and again incense from the priest's censer and the kneeling and
							
							the prayer. Ever since then- only yesterday I took it up- I've never
							
							been able to read that sacred tale without tears. And how much that is
							
							great, mysterious and unfathomable there is in it! Afterwards I
							
							heard the words of mockery and blame, proud words, "How could God give
							
							up the most loved of His saints for the diversion of the devil, take
							
							from him his children, smite him with sore boils so that he cleansed
							
							the corruption from his sores with a potsherd- and for no object
							
							except to boast to the devil 'See what My saint can suffer for My
							
							sake.' "But the greatness of it lies just in the fact that it is a
							
							mystery- that the passing earthly show and the eternal verity are
							
							brought together in it. In the face of the earthly truth, the
							
							eternal truth is accomplished. The Creator, just as on the first
							
							days of creation He ended each day with praise: "That is good that I
							
							have created," looks upon Job and again praises His creation. And Job,
							
							praising the Lord, serves not only Him but all His creation for
							
							generations and generations, and for ever and ever, since for that
							
							he was ordained. Good heavens, what a book it is, and what lessons
							
							there are in it! What a book the Bible is, what a miracle, what
							
							strength is given with it to man! It is like a mould cast of the world
							
							and man and human nature, everything is there, and a law for
							
							everything for all the ages. And what mysteries are solved and
							
							revealed! God raises Job again, gives him wealth again. Many years
							
							pass by, and he has other children and loves them. But how could he
							
							love those new ones when those first children are no more, when he has
							
							lost them? Remembering them, how could he be fully happy with those
							
							new ones, however dear the new ones might be? But he could, he
							
							could. It's the great mystery of human life that old grief passes
							
							gradually into quiet, tender joy. The mild serenity of age takes the
							
							place of the riotous blood of youth. I bless the rising sun each
							
							day, and, as before, my heart sings to meet it, but now I love even
							
							more its setting, its long slanting rays and the soft, tender,
							
							gentle memories that come with them, the dear images from the whole of
							
							my long, happy life- and over all the Divine Truth, softening,
							
							reconciling, forgiving! My life is ending, I know that well, but every
							
							day that is left me I feel how earthly life is in touch with a new
							
							infinite, unknown, but approaching life, the nearness of which sets my
							
							soul quivering with rapture, my mind glowing and my heart weeping with
							
							joy.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p56">Friends and teachers, I have heard more than once, and of late one
							
							may hear it more often, that the priests, and above all the village
							
							priests, are complaining on all sides of their miserable income and
							
							their humiliating lot. They plainly state, even in print- I've read it
							
							myself- that they are unable to teach the Scriptures to the people
							
							because of the smallness of their means, and if Lutherans and heretics
							
							come and lead the flock astray, they let them lead them astray because
							
							they have so little to live upon. May the Lord increase the sustenance
							
							that is so precious to them, for their complaint is just, too. But
							
							of a truth I say, if anyone is to blame in the matter, half the
							
							fault is ours. For he may be short of time, he may say truly that he
							
							is overwhelmed all the while with work and services, but still it's
							
							not all the time, even he has an hour a week to remember God. And he
							
							does not work the whole year round. Let him gather round him once a
							
							week, some hour in the evening, if only the children at first- the
							
							fathers will hear of it and they too will begin to come. There's no
							
							need to build halls for this, let him take them into his own
							
							cottage. They won't spoil his cottage, they would only be there one
							
							hour. Let him open that book and begin reading it without grand
							
							words or superciliousness, without condescension to them, but gently
							
							and kindly, being glad that he is reading to them and that they are
							
							listening with attention, loving the words himself, only stopping from
							
							time to time to explain words that are not understood by the peasants.
							
							Don't be anxious, they will understand everything, the orthodox
							
							heart will understand all! Let him read them about Abraham and
							
							Sarah, about Isaac and Rebecca, of how Jacob went to Laban and
							
							wrestled with the Lord in his dream and said, "This place is holy"-
							
							and he will impress the devout mind of the peasant. Let him read,
							
							especially to the children, how the brothers sold Joseph, the tender
							
							boy, the dreamer and prophet, into bondage, and told their father that
							
							a wild beast had devoured him, and showed him his blood-stained
							
							clothes. Let him read them how the brothers afterwards journeyed
							
							into Egypt for corn, and Joseph, already a great ruler, unrecognised
							
							by them, tormented them, accused them, kept his brother Benjamin,
							
							and all through love: "I love you, and loving you I torment you."
							
							For he remembered all his life how they had sold him to the
							
							merchants in the burning desert by the well, and how, wringing his
							
							hands, he had wept and besought his brothers not to sell him as a
							
							slave in a strange land. And how, seeing them again after many
							
							years, he loved them beyond measure, but he harassed and tormented
							
							them in love. He left them at last not able to bear the suffering of
							
							his heart, flung himself on his bed and wept. Then, wiping his tears
							
							away, he went out to them joyful and told them, "Brothers, I am your
							
							brother Joseph" Let him read them further how happy old Jacob was on
							
							learning that his darling boy was still alive, and how he went to
							
							Egypt leaving his own country, and died in a foreign land, bequeathing
							
							his great prophecy that had lain mysteriously hidden in his meek and
							
							timid heart all his life, that from his offspring, from Judah, will
							
							come the great hope of the world, the Messiah and Saviour.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p57">Fathers and teachers, forgive me and don't be angry, that like a
							
							little child I've been babbling of what you know long ago, and can
							
							teach me a hundred times more skilfully. I only speak from rapture,
							
							and forgive my tears, for I love the Bible. Let him too weep, the
							
							priest of God, and be sure that the hearts of his listeners will throb
							
							in response. Only a little tiny seed is needed- drop it into the heart
							
							of the peasant and it won't die, it will live in his soul all his
							
							life, it will be hidden in the midst of his darkness and sin, like a
							
							bright spot, like a great reminder. And there's no need of much
							
							teaching or explanation, he will understand it all simply. Do you
							
							suppose that the peasants don't understand? Try reading them the
							
							touching story of the fair Esther and the haughty Vashti; or the
							
							miraculous story of Jonah in the whale. Don't forget either the
							
							parables of Our Lord, choose especially from the Gospel of St. Luke
							
							(that is what I did), and then from the Acts of the Apostles the
							
							conversion of St. Paul (that you mustn't leave out on any account),
							
							and from the Lives of the Saints, for instance, the life of Alexey,
							
							the man of God and, greatest of all, the happy martyr and the seer
							
							of God, Mary of Egypt- and you will penetrate their hearts with
							
							these simple tales. Give one hour a week to it in spite of your
							
							poverty, only one little hour. And you will see for yourselves that
							
							our people is gracious and grateful, and will repay you a hundred
							
							foId. Mindful of the kindness of their priest and the moving words
							
							they have heard from him, they will of their own accord help him in
							
							his fields and in his house and will treat him with more respect
							
							than before- so that it will even increase his worldly well-being too.
							
							The thing is so simple that sometimes one is even afraid to put it
							
							into words, for fear of being laughed at, and yet how true it is!
							
							One who does not believe in God will not believe in God's people. He
							
							who believes in God's people will see His Holiness too, even though he
							
							had not believed in it till then. Only the people and their future
							
							spiritual power will convert our atheists, who have torn themselves
							
							away from their native soil.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p58">And what is the use of Christ's words, unless we set an example?
							
							The people is lost without the Word of God, for its soul is athirst
							
							for the Word and for all that is good.
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p59">In my youth, long ago, nearly forty years ago, I travelled all
							
							over Russia with Father Anfim, collecting funds for our monastery, and
							
							we stayed one night on the bank of a great navigable river with some
							
							fishermen. A good looking peasant lad, about eighteen, joined us; he
							
							had to hurry back next morning to pull a merchant's barge along the
							
							bank. I noticed him looking straight before him with clear and
							
							tender eyes. It was a bright, warm, still, July night, a cool mist
							
							rose from the broad river, we could hear the plash of a fish, the
							
							birds were still, all was hushed and beautiful, everything praying
							
							to God. Only we two were not sleeping, the lad and I, and we talked of
							
							the beauty of this world of God's and of the great mystery of it.
							
							Every blade of grass, every insect, ant, and golden bee, all so
							
							marvellously know their path, though they have not intelligence,
							
							they bear witness to the mystery of God and continually accomplish
							
							it themselves. I saw the dear lad's heart was moved. He told me that
							
							he loved the forest and the forest birds. He was a bird-catcher,
							
							knew the note of each of them, could call each bird. "I know nothing
							
							better than to be in the forest," said he, "though all things are
							
							good."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p60">"Truly," I answered him, "all things are good and fair, because
							
							all is truth. Look," said I, "at the horse, that great beast that is
							
							so near to man; or the lowly, pensive ox, which feeds him and works
							
							for him; look at their faces, what meekness, what devotion to man, who
							
							often beats them mercilessly. What gentleness, what confidence and
							
							what beauty! It's touching to know that there's no sin in them, for
							
							all, all except man, is sinless, and Christ has been with them
							
							before us."
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p61">"Why," asked the boy, "is Christ with them too?"
							
								</p><p id="i_9-p62">"It cannot but be so," said I, "since the Word is for all. All
							
							creation and all creatures, every leaf is striving to the Word,
							
							singing glory to God, weeping to Christ, unconsciously accomplishing
							
							this by the mystery of their sinless life. Yonder," said I, "in the
							
							forest wanders the dreadful bear, fierce and menacing, and yet
							
							innocent in it." And I told him how once a bear came to a great
							
							saint who had taken refuge in a tiny cell in the wood. And the great
							
							saint pitied him, went up to him without fear and gave him a piece
							
							of bread. "Go along," said he, "Christ be with you," and the savage
							
							beast walked away meekly and obediently, doing no harm. And the lad
							
							was delighted that the bear had walked away without hurting the saint,
							
							and that Christ was with him too. "Ah," said he, "how good that is,
							
							how good and beautiful is all God's work!" He sat musing softly and
							
							sweetly. I saw he understood. And he slept beside me a light and
							
							sinless sleep. May God bless youth! And I prayed for him as I went
							
							to sleep. Lord, send peace and light to Thy people!		</p>								
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - (c) Recollections of Father Zossima's Youth before" prev="i_9" next="iii_7" id="ii_8">
					
							<p id="ii_8-p1">I SPENT a long time, almost eight years, in the military cadet
							
							school at Petersburg, and in the novelty of my surroundings there,
							
							many of my childish impressions grew dimmer, though I forgot
							
							nothing. I picked up so many new habits and opinions that I was
							
							transformed into a cruel, absurd, almost savage creature. A surface
							
							polish of courtesy and society manners I did acquire together with the
							
							French language.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p2">But we all, myself included, looked upon the soldiers in our
							
							service as cattle. I was perhaps worse than the rest in that
							
							respect, for I was so much more impressionable than my companions.
							
							By the time we left the school as officers, we were ready to lay
							
							down our lives for the honour of the regiment, but no one of us had
							
							any knowledge of the real meaning of honour, and if anyone had known
							
							it, he would have been the first to ridicule it. Drunkenness,
							
							debauchery and devilry were what we almost prided ourselves on. I
							
							don't say that we were bad by nature, all these young men were good
							
							fellows, but they behaved badly, and I worst of all. What made it
							
							worse for me was that I had come into my own money, and so I flung
							
							myself into a life of pleasure, and plunged headlong into all the
							
							recklessness of youth.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p3">I was fond of reading, yet strange to say, the Bible was the one
							
							book I never opened at that time, though I always carried it about
							
							with me, and I was never separated from it; in very truth I was
							
							keeping that book "for the day and the hour, for the month and the
							
							year," though I knew it not.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p4">After four years of this life, I chanced to be in the town of K.
							
							where our regiment was stationed at the time. We found the people of
							
							the town hospitable, rich, and fond of entertainments. I met with a
							
							cordial reception everywhere, as I was of a lively temperament and was
							
							known to be well off, which always goes a long way in the world. And
							
							then a circumstance happened which was the beginning of it all.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p5">I formed an attachment to a beautiful and intelligent young girl
							
							of noble and lofty character, the daughter of people much respected.
							
							They were well-to-do people of influence and position. They always
							
							gave me a cordial and friendly reception. I fancied that the young
							
							lady looked on me with favour and my heart was aflame at such an idea.
							
							Later on I saw and fully realised that I perhaps was not so
							
							passionately in love with her at all, but only recognised the
							
							elevation of her mind and character, which I could not indeed have
							
							helped doing. I was prevented, however, from making her an offer at
							
							the time by my selfishness; I was loath to part with the allurements
							
							of my free and licentious bachelor life in the heyday of my youth, and
							
							with my pockets full of money. I did drop some hint as to my
							
							feelings however, though I put off taking any decisive step for a
							
							time. Then, all of a sudden, we were ordered off for two months to
							
							another district.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p6">On my return two months later, I found the young lady already
							
							married to a rich neighbouring landowner, a very amiable man, still
							
							young though older than I was, connected with the best Petersburg
							
							society, which I was not, and of excellent education, which I also was
							
							not. I was so overwhelmed at this unexpected circumstance that my mind
							
							was positively clouded. The worst of it all was that, as I learned
							
							then, the young landowner had been a long while betrothed to her,
							
							and I had met him indeed many times in her house, but blinded by my
							
							conceit I had noticed nothing. And this particularly mortified me;
							
							almost everybody had known all about it, while I knew nothing. I was
							
							filled with sudden irrepressible fury. With flushed face I began
							
							recalling how often I had been on the point of declaring my love to
							
							her, and as she had not attempted to stop me or to warn me, she
							
							must, I concluded, have been laughing at me all the time. Later on, of
							
							course, I reflected and remembered that she had been very far from
							
							laughing at me; on the contrary, she used to turn off any
							
							love-making on my part with a jest and begin talking of other
							
							subjects; but at that moment I was incapable of reflecting and was all
							
							eagerness for revenge. I am surprised to remember that my wrath and
							
							revengeful feelings were extremely repugnant to my own nature, for
							
							being of an easy temper, I found it difficult to be angry with
							
							anyone for long, and so I had to work myself up artificially and
							
							became at last revolting and absurd.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p7">I waited for an opportunity and succeeded in insulting my
							
							"rival" in the presence of a large company. I insulted him on a
							
							perfectly extraneous pretext, jeering at his opinion upon an important
							
							public event- it was in the year 1826- my jeer was, so people said,
							
							clever and effective. Then I forced him to ask for an explanation, and
							
							behaved so rudely that he accepted my challenge in spite of the vast
							
							inequality between us, as I was younger, a person of no consequence,
							
							and of inferior rank. I learned afterwards for a fact that it was from
							
							a jealous feeling on his side also that my challenge was accepted;
							
							he had been rather jealous of me on his wife's account before their
							
							marriage; he fancied now that if he submitted to be insulted by me and
							
							refused to accept my challenge, and if she heard of it, she might
							
							begin to despise him and waver in her love for him. I soon found a
							
							second in a comrade, an ensign of our regiment. In those days though
							
							duels were severely punished, yet duelling was a kind of fashion among
							
							the officers- so strong and deeply rooted will a brutal prejudice
							
							sometimes be.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p8">It was the end of June, and our meeting was to take place at seven
							
							o'clock the next day on the outskirts of the town- and then
							
							something happened that in very truth was the turning point of my
							
							life. In the evening, returning home in a savage and brutal humour,
							
							I flew into a rage with my orderly Afanasy, and gave him two blows
							
							in the face with all my might, so that it was covered with blood. He
							
							had not long been in my service and I had struck him before, but never
							
							with such ferocious cruelty. And, believe me, though it's forty
							
							years ago, I recall it now with shame and pain. I went to bed and
							
							slept for about three hours; when I waked up the day was breaking. I
							
							got up- I did not want to sleep any more- I went to the window- opened
							
							it, it looked out upon the garden; I saw the sun rising; it was warm
							
							and beautiful, the birds were singing.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p9">"What's the meaning of it?" I thought. "I feel in my heart as it
							
							were something vile and shameful. Is it because I am going to shed
							
							blood? No," I thought, "I feel it's not that. Can it be that I am
							
							afraid of death, afraid of being killed? No, that's not it, that's not
							
							it at all."... And all at once I knew what it was: it was because I
							
							had beaten Afanasy the evening before! It all rose before my mind,
							
							it all was, as it were, repeated over again; he stood before me and
							
							I was beating him straight on the face and he was holding his arms
							
							stiffly down, his head erect, his eyes fixed upon me as though on
							
							parade. He staggered at every blow and did not even dare to raise
							
							his hands to protect himself. That is what a man has been brought
							
							to, and that was a man beating a fellow creature! What a crime! It was
							
							as though a sharp dagger had pierced me right through. I stood as if I
							
							were struck dumb, while the sun was shining, the leaves were rejoicing
							
							and the birds were trilling the praise of God.... I hid my face in
							
							my hands, fell on my bed and broke into a storm of tears. And then I
							
							remembered by brother Markel and what he said on his death-bed to
							
							his servants: "My dear ones, why do you wait on me, why do you love
							
							me, am I worth your waiting on me?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p10">"Yes, am I worth it?" flashed through my mind. "After all what
							
							am I worth, that another man, a fellow creature, made in the
							
							likeness and image of God, should serve me?" For the first time in
							
							my life this question forced itself upon me. He had said, "Mother,
							
							my little heart, in truth we are each responsible to all for all, it's
							
							only that men don't know this. If they knew it, the world would be a
							
							paradise at once."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p11">"God, can that too be false?" I thought as I wept. "In truth,
							
							perhaps, I am more than all others responsible for all, a greater
							
							sinner than all men in the world." And all at once the whole truth
							
							in its full light appeared to me: what was I going to do? I was
							
							going to kill a good, clever, noble man, who had done me no wrong, and
							
							by depriving his wife of happiness for the rest of her life, I
							
							should be torturing and killing her too. I lay thus in my bed with
							
							my face in the pillow, heedless how the time was passing. Suddenly
							
							my second, the ensign, came in with the pistols to fetch me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p12">"Ah," said he, "it's a good thing you are up already, it's time we
							
							were off, come along!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p13">I did not know what to do and hurried to and fro undecided; we
							
							went out to the carriage, however.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p14">"Wait here a minute," I said to him. "I'll be back directly, I
							
							have forgotten my purse."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p15">And I ran back alone, to Afanasy's little room.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p16">"Afanasy," I said, "I gave you two blows on the face yesterday,
							
							forgive me," I said.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p17">He started as though he were frightened, and looked at me; and I
							
							saw that it was not enough, and on the spot, in my full officer's
							
							uniform, I dropped at his feet and bowed my head to the ground.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p18">"Forgive me," I said.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p19">Then he was completely aghast.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p20">"Your honour... sir, what are you doing? Am I worth it?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p21">And he burst out crying as I had done before, hid his face in
							
							his hands, turned to the window and shook all over with his sobs. I
							
							flew out to my comrade and jumped into the carriage.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p22">"Ready," I cried. "Have you ever seen a conqueror?" I asked him.
							
							"Here is one before you."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p23">I was in ecstasy, laughing and talking all the way, I don't
							
							remember what about.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p24">He looked at me. "Well, brother, you are a plucky fellow, you'll
							
							keep up the honour of the uniform, I can see."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p25">So we reached the place and found them there, waiting us. We
							
							were placed twelve paces apart; he had the first shot. I stood
							
							gaily, looking him full in the face; I did not twitch an eyelash, I
							
							looked lovingly at him, for I knew what I would do. His shot just
							
							grazed my cheek and ear.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p26">"Thank God," I cried, "no man has been killed," and I seized my
							
							pistol, turned back and flung it far away into the wood. "That's the
							
							place for you," I cried.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p27">I turned to my adversary.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p28">"Forgive me, young fool that I am, sir," I said, "for my
							
							unprovoked insult to you and for forcing you to fire at me. I am ten
							
							times worse than you and more, maybe. Tell that to the person whom you
							
							hold dearest in the world."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p29">I had no sooner said this than they all three shouted at me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p30">"Upon my word," cried my adversary, annoyed, "if you did not
							
							want to fight, why did not you let me alone?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p31">"Yesterday I was a fool, to-day I know better," I answered him
							
							gaily.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p32">"As to yesterday, I believe you, but as for to-day, it is
							
							difficult to agree with your opinion," said he.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p33">"Bravo," I cried, clapping my hands. "I agree with you there
							
							too, I have deserved it!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p34">"Will you shoot, sir, or not?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p35">"No, I won't," I said; "if you like, fire at me again, but it
							
							would be better for you not to fire."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p36">The seconds, especially mine, were shouting too: "Can you disgrace
							
							the regiment like this, facing your antagonist and begging his
							
							forgiveness! If I'd only known this!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p37">I stood facing them all, not laughing now.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p38">"Gentlemen," I said, "is it really so wonderful in these days to
							
							find a man who can repent of his stupidity and publicly confess his
							
							wrongdoing?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p39">"But not in a duel," cried my second again.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p40">"That's what's so strange," I said. "For I ought to have owned
							
							my fault as soon as I got here, before he had fired a shot, before
							
							leading him into a great and deadly sin; but we have made our life
							
							so grotesque, that to act in that way would have been almost
							
							impossible, for only after I had faced his shot at the distance of
							
							twelve paces could my words have any significance for him, and if I
							
							had spoken before, he would have said, 'He is a coward, the sight of
							
							the pistols has frightened him, no use to listen to him.'
							
							Gentlemen," I cried suddenly, speaking straight from my heart, "look
							
							around you at the gifts of God, the clear sky, the pure air, the
							
							tender grass, the birds; nature is beautiful and sinless, and we, only
							
							we, are sinful and foolish, and we don't understand that life is
							
							heaven, for we have only to understand that and it will at once be
							
							fulfilled in all its beauty, we shall embrace each other and weep."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p41">I would have said more but I could not; my voice broke with the
							
							sweetness and youthful gladness of it, and there was such bliss in
							
							my heart as I had never known before in my life.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p42">"All this is rational and edifying," said my antagonist, "and in
							
							any case you are an original person."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p43">"You may laugh," I said to him, laughing too, "but afterwards
							
							you will approve of me."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p44">"Oh, I am ready to approve of you now," said he; "will you shake
							
							hands? for I believe you are genuinely sincere."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p45">"No," I said, "not now, later on when I have grown worthier and
							
							deserve your esteem, then shake hands and you will do well."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p46">We went home, my second upbraiding me all the way, while I
							
							kissed him. All my comrades heard of the affair at once and gathered
							
							together to pass judgment on me the same day.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p47">"He has disgraced the uniform," they said; "Let him resign his
							
							commission."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p48">Some stood up for me: "He faced the shot," they said.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p49">"Yes, but he was afraid of his other shot and begged for
							
							forgiveness."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p50">"If he had been afraid of being shot, he would have shot his own
							
							pistol first before asking forgiveness, while he flung it loaded
							
							into the forest. No, there's something else in this, something
							
							original."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p51">I enjoyed listening and looking at them. "My dear friends and
							
							comrades," said I, "don't worry about my resigning my commission,
							
							for I have done so already. I have sent in my papers this morning
							
							and as soon as I get my discharge I shall go into a monastery- it's
							
							with that object I am leaving the regiment."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p52">When I had said this every one of them burst out laughing.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p53">"You should have told us of that first, that explains
							
							everything, we can't judge a monk."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p54">They laughed and could not stop themselves, and not scornfully,
							
							but kindly and merrily. They all felt friendly to me at once, even
							
							those who had been sternest in their censure, and all the following
							
							month, before my discharge came, they could not make enough of me.
							
							"Ah, you monk," they would say. And everyone said something kind to
							
							me, they began trying to dissuade me, even to pity me: "What are you
							
							doing to yourself?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p55">"No," they would say, "he is a brave fellow, he faced fire and
							
							could have fired his own pistol too, but he had a dream the night
							
							before that he should become a monk, that's why he did it."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p56">It was the same thing with the society of the town. Till then I
							
							had been kindly received, but had not been the object of special
							
							attention, and now all came to know me at once and invited me; they
							
							laughed at me, but they loved me. I may mention that although
							
							everybody talked openly of our duel, the authorities took no notice of
							
							it, because my antagonist was a near relation of our general, and as
							
							there had been no bloodshed and no serious consequences, and as I
							
							resigned my commission, they took it as a joke. And I began then to
							
							speak aloud and fearlessly, regardless of their laughter, for it was
							
							always kindly and not spiteful laughter. These conversations mostly
							
							took place in the evenings, in the company of ladies; women
							
							particularly liked listening to me then and they made the men listen.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p57">"But how can I possibly be responsible for all?" everyone would
							
							laugh in my face. "Can I, for instance, be responsible for you?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p58">"You may well not know it," I would answer, "since the whole world
							
							has long been going on a different line, since we consider the veriest
							
							lies as truth and demand the same lies from others. Here I have for
							
							once in my life acted sincerely and, well, you all look upon me as a
							
							madman. Though you are friendly to me, yet, you see, you all laugh
							
							at me."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p59">"But how can we help being friendly to you?" said my hostess,
							
							laughing. The room was full of people. All of a sudden the young
							
							lady rose, on whose account the duel had been fought and whom only
							
							lately I had intended to be my future wife. I had not noticed her
							
							coming into the room. She got up, came to me and held out her hand.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p60">"Let me tell you," she said, "that I am the first not to laugh
							
							at you, but on the contrary I thank you with tears and express my
							
							respect for you for your action then."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p61">Her husband, too, came up and then they all approached me and
							
							almost kissed me. My heart was filled with joy, but my attention was
							
							especially caught by a middle-aged man who came up to me with the
							
							others. I knew him by name already, but had never made his
							
							acquaintance nor exchanged a word with him till that evening.</p><p id="ii_8-p62" /><p id="ii_8-p63" />
							
							
							
												 <p class="center" id="ii_8-p64">(d) The Mysterious Visitor.</p><p id="ii_8-p65" /><p id="ii_8-p66">
							
							
							
								He had long been an official in the town; he was in a prominent
							
							position, respected by all, rich and had a reputation for benevolence.
							
							He subscribed considerable sums to the almshouse and the orphan
							
							asylum; he was very charitable, too, in secret, a fact which only
							
							became known after his death. He was a man of about fifty, almost
							
							stern in appearance and not much given to conversation. He had been
							
							married about ten years and his wife, who was still young, had borne
							
							him three children. Well, I was sitting alone in my room the following
							
							evening, when my door suddenly opened and this gentleman walked in.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p67">I must mention, by the way, that I was no longer living in my
							
							former quarters. As soon as I resigned my commission, I took rooms
							
							with an old lady, the widow of a government clerk. My landlady's
							
							servant waited upon me, for I had moved into her rooms simply
							
							because on my return from the duel I had sent Afanasy back to the
							
							regiment, as I felt ashamed to look him in the face after my last
							
							interview with him. So prone is the man of the world to be ashamed
							
							of any righteous action.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p68">"I have," said my visitor, "with great interest listened to you
							
							speaking in different houses the last few days and I wanted at last to
							
							make your personal acquaintance, so as to talk to you more intimately.
							
							Can you, dear sir, grant me this favour?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p69">"I can, with the greatest pleasure, and I shall look upon it as an
							
							honour." I said this, though I felt almost dismayed, so greatly was
							
							I impressed from the first moment by the appearance of this man. For
							
							though other people had listened to me with interest and attention, no
							
							one had come to me before with such a serious, stern, and concentrated
							
							expression. And now he had come to see me in my own rooms. He sat
							
							down.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p70">"You are, I see, a man of great strength of character" he said;
							
							"as you have dared to serve the truth, even when by doing so you
							
							risked incurring the contempt of all."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p71">"Your praise is, perhaps, excessive," I replied.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p72">"No, it's not excessive," he answered; "believe me, such a
							
							course of action is far more difficult than you think. It is that
							
							which has impressed me, and it is only on that account that I have
							
							come to you," he continued. "Tell me, please, that is if you are not
							
							annoyed by my perhaps unseemly curiosity, what were your exact
							
							sensations, if you can recall them, at the moment when you made up
							
							your mind to ask forgiveness at the duel. Do not think my question
							
							frivolous; on the contrary, I have in asking the question a secret
							
							motive of my own, which I will perhaps explain to you later on, if
							
							it is God's will that we should become more intimately acquainted."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p73">All the while he was speaking, I was looking at him straight
							
							into the face and I felt all at once a complete trust in him and great
							
							curiosity on my side also, for I felt that there was some strange
							
							secret in his soul.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p74">"You ask what were my exact sensations at the moment when I
							
							asked my opponent's forgiveness," I answered; "but I had better tell
							
							you from the beginning what I have not yet told anyone else." And I
							
							described all that had passed between Afanasy and me, and how I had
							
							bowed down to the ground at his feet. "From that you can see for
							
							yourself," I concluded, "that at the time of the duel it was easier
							
							for me, for I had made a beginning already at home, and when once I
							
							had started on that road, to go farther along it was far from being
							
							difficult, but became a source of joy and happiness."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p75">I liked the way he looked at me as he listened. "All that," he
							
							said, "is exceedingly interesting. I will come to see you again and
							
							again."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p76">And from that time forth he came to see me nearly every evening.
							
							And we should have become greater friends, if only he had ever
							
							talked of himself. But about himself he scarcely ever said a word, yet
							
							continually asked me about myself. In spite of that I became very fond
							
							of him and spoke with perfect frankness to him about all my
							
							feelings; "for," thought I, "what need have I to know his secrets,
							
							since I can see without that that is a good man? Moreover, though he
							
							is such a serious man and my senior, he comes to see a youngster
							
							like me and treats me as his equal." And I learned a great deal that
							
							was profitable from him, for he was a man of lofty mind.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p77">"That life is heaven," he said to me suddenly, "that I have long
							
							been thinking about"; and all at once he added, "I think of nothing
							
							else indeed." He looked at me and smiled. "I am more convinced of it
							
							than you are, I will tell you later why."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p78">I listened to him and thought that he evidently wanted to tell
							
							me something.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p79">"Heaven," he went on, "lies hidden within all of us- here it
							
							lies hidden in me now, and if I will it, it will be revealed to me
							
							to-morrow and for all time."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p80">I looked at him; he was speaking with great emotion and gazing
							
							mysteriously at me, as if he were questioning me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p81">"And that we are all responsible to all for all, apart from our
							
							own sins, you were quite right in thinking that, and it is wonderful
							
							how you could comprehend it in all its significance at once. And in
							
							very truth, so soon as men understand that, the Kingdom of Heaven will
							
							be for them not a dream, but a living reality."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p82">"And when," I cried out to him bitterly, "when will that come to
							
							pass? and will it ever come to pass? Is not it simply a dream of
							
							ours?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p83">"What then, you don't believe it," he said. "You preach it and
							
							don't believe it yourself. Believe me, this dream, as you call it,
							
							will come to pass without doubt; it will come, but not now, for
							
							every process has its law. It's a spiritual, psychological process. To
							
							transform the world, to recreate it afresh, men must turn into another
							
							path psychologically. Until you have become really, in actual fact,
							
							a brother to everyone, brotherhood will not come to pass. No sort of
							
							scientific teaching, no kind of common interest, will ever teach men
							
							to share property and privileges with equal consideration for all.
							
							Everyone will think his share too small and they will be always
							
							envying, complaining and attacking one another. You ask when it will
							
							come to pass; it will come to pass, but first we have to go though the
							
							period of isolation."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p84">"What do you mean by isolation?" I asked him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p85">"Why, the isolation that prevails everywhere, above all in our
							
							age- it has not fully developed, it has not reached its limit yet. For
							
							everyone strives to keep his individuality as apart as possible,
							
							wishes to secure the greatest possible fullness of life for himself;
							
							but meantime all his efforts result not in attaining fullness of
							
							life but self-destruction, for instead of self-realisation he ends
							
							by arriving at complete solitude. All mankind in our age have split up
							
							into units, they all keep apart, each in his own groove; each one
							
							holds aloof, hides himself and hides what he has, from the rest, and
							
							he ends by being repelled by others and repelling them. He heaps up
							
							riches by himself and thinks, 'How strong I am now and how secure,'
							
							and in his madness he does not understand that the more he heaps up,
							
							the more he sinks into self-destructive impotence. For he is
							
							accustomed to rely upon himself alone and to cut himself off from
							
							the whole; he has trained himself not to believe in the help of
							
							others, in men and in humanity, and only trembles for fear he should
							
							lose his money and the privileges that he has won for himself.
							
							Everywhere in these days men have, in their mockery, ceased to
							
							understand that the true security is to be found in social
							
							solidarity rather than in isolated individual effort. But this
							
							terrible individualism must inevitably have an end, and all will
							
							suddenly understand how unnaturally they are separated from one
							
							another. It will be the spirit of the time, and people will marvel
							
							that they have sat so long in darkness without seeing the light. And
							
							then the sign of the Son of Man will be seen in the heavens.... But,
							
							until then, we must keep the banner flying. Sometimes even if he has
							
							to do it alone, and his conduct seems to be crazy, a man must set an
							
							example, and so draw men's souls out of their solitude, and spur
							
							them to some act of brotherly love, that the great idea may not die."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p86">Our evenings, one after another, were spent in such stirring and
							
							fervent talk. I gave up society and visited my neighbours much less
							
							frequently. Besides, my vogue was somewhat over. I say this, not as
							
							blame, for they still loved me and treated me good-humouredly, but
							
							there's no denying that fashion is a great power in society. I began
							
							to regard my mysterious visitor with admiration, for besides
							
							enjoying his intelligence, I began to perceive that he was brooding
							
							over some plan in his heart, and was preparing himself perhaps for a
							
							great deed. Perhaps he liked my not showing curiosity about his
							
							secret, not seeking to discover it by direct question nor by
							
							insinuation. But I noticed at last, that he seemed to show signs of
							
							wanting to tell me something. This had become quite evident, indeed,
							
							about a month after he first began to visit me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p87">"Do you know," he said to me once, "that people are very
							
							inquisitive about us in the town and wonder why I come to see you so
							
							often. But let them wonder, for soon all will be explained."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p88">Sometimes an extraordinary agitation would come over him, and
							
							almost always on such occasions he would get up and go away. Sometimes
							
							he would fix a long piercing look upon me, and I thought, "He will say
							
							something directly now." But he would suddenly begin talking of
							
							something ordinary and familiar. He often complained of headache too.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p89">One day, quite unexpectedly indeed, after he had been talking with
							
							great fervour a long time, I saw him suddenly turn pale, and his
							
							face worked convulsively, while he stared persistently at me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p90">"What's the matter?" I said; "do you feel ill?"- he had just
							
							been complaining of headache.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p91">"I... do you know... I murdered someone."
							
							</p><p id="ii_8-p92"> He said this and smiled with a face as white as chalk. "Why is
							
							it he is smiling?" The thought flashed through my mind before I
							
							realised anything else. I too turned pale.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p93">"What are you saying?" I cried.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p94">"You see," he said, with a pale smile, "how much it has cost me to
							
							say the first word. Now I have said it, I feel I've taken the first
							
							step and shall go on."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p95">For a long while I could not believe him, and I did not believe
							
							him at that time, but only after he had been to see me three days
							
							running and told me all about it. I thought he was mad, but ended by
							
							being convinced, to my great grief and amazement. His crime was a
							
							great and terrible one.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p96">Fourteen years before, he had murdered the widow of a landowner, a
							
							wealthy and handsome young woman who had a house in our town. He
							
							fell passionately in love with her, declared his feeling and tried
							
							to persuade her to marry him. But she had already given her heart to
							
							another man, an officer of noble birth and high rank in the service,
							
							who was at that time away at the front, though she was expecting him
							
							soon to return. She refused his offer and begged him not to come and
							
							see her. After he had ceased to visit her, he took advantage of his
							
							knowledge of the house to enter at night through the garden by the
							
							roof, at great risk of discovery. But, as often happens, a crime
							
							committed with extraordinary audacity is more successful than others.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p97">Entering the garret through the skylight, he went down the ladder,
							
							knowing that the door at the bottom of it was sometimes, through the
							
							negligence of the servants, left unlocked. He hoped to find it so, and
							
							so it was. He made his way in the dark to her bedroom, where a light
							
							was burning. As though on purpose, both her maids had gone off to a
							
							birthday party in the same street, without asking leave. The other
							
							servants slept in the servants' quarters or in the kitchen on the
							
							ground floor. His passion flamed up at the sight of her asleep, and
							
							then vindictive, jealous anger took possession of his heart, and
							
							like a drunken man, beside himself, he thrust a knife into her
							
							heart, so that she did not even cry out. Then with devilish and
							
							criminal cunning he contrived that suspicion should fall on the
							
							servants. He was so base as to take her purse, to open her chest
							
							with keys from under her pillow, and to take some things from it,
							
							doing it all as it might have been done by an ignorant servant,
							
							leaving valuable papers and taking only money. He took some of the
							
							larger gold things, but left smaller articles that were ten times as
							
							valuable. He took with him, too, some things for himself as
							
							remembrances, but of that later. Having done this awful deed. he
							
							returned by the way he had come.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p98">Neither the next day, when the alarm was raised, nor at any time
							
							after in his life, did anyone dream of suspecting that he was the
							
							criminal. No one indeed knew of his love for her, for he was always
							
							reserved and silent and had no friend to whom he would have opened his
							
							heart. He was looked upon simply as an acquaintance, and not a very
							
							intimate one, of the murdered woman, as for the previous fortnight
							
							he had not even visited her. A serf of hers called Pyotr was at once
							
							suspected, and every circumstance confirmed the suspicion. The man
							
							knew- indeed his mistress did not conceal the fact- that having to
							
							send one of her serfs as a recruit she had decided to send him, as
							
							he had no relations and his conduct was unsatisfactory. People had
							
							heard him angrily threatening to murder her when he was drunk in a
							
							tavern. Two days before her death, he had run away, staying no one
							
							knew where in the town. The day after the murder, he was found on
							
							the road leading out of the town, dead drunk, with a knife in his
							
							pocket, and his right hand happened to be stained with blood. He
							
							declared that his nose had been bleeding, but no one believed him. The
							
							maids confessed that they had gone to a party and that the street door
							
							had been left open till they returned. And a number of similar details
							
							came to light, throwing suspicion on the innocent servant.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p99">They arrested him, and he was tried for the murder; but a week
							
							after the arrest, the prisoner fell sick of a fever and died
							
							unconscious in the hospital. There the matter ended and the judges and
							
							the authorities and everyone in the town remained convinced that the
							
							crime had been committed by no one but the servant who had died in the
							
							hospital. And after that the punishment began.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p100">My mysterious visitor, now my friend, told me that at first he was
							
							not in the least troubled by pangs of conscience. He was miserable a
							
							long time, but not for that reason; only from regret that he had
							
							killed the woman he loved, that she was no more, that in killing her
							
							he had killed his love, while the fire of passion was still in his
							
							veins. But of the innocent blood he had shed, of the murder of a
							
							fellow creature, he scarcely thought. The thought that his victim
							
							might have become the wife of another man was insupportable to him,
							
							and so, for a long time, he was convinced in his conscience that he
							
							could not have acted otherwise.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p101">At first he was worried at the arrest of the servant, but his
							
							illness and death soon set his mind at rest, for the man's death was
							
							apparently (so he reflected at the time) not owing to his arrest or
							
							his fright, but a chill he had taken on the day he ran away, when he
							
							had lain all night dead drunk on the damp ground. The theft of the
							
							money and other things troubled him little, for he argued that the
							
							theft had not been committed for gain but to avert suspicion. The
							
							sum stolen was small, and he shortly afterwards subscribed the whole
							
							of it, and much more, towards the funds for maintaining an almshouse
							
							in the town. He did this on purpose to set his conscience at rest
							
							about the theft, and it's a remarkable fact that for a long time he
							
							really was at peace- he told me this himself. He entered then upon a
							
							career of great activity in the service, volunteered for a difficult
							
							and laborious duty, which occupied him two years, and being a man of
							
							strong will almost forgot the past. Whenever he recalled it, he
							
							tried not to think of it at all. He became active in philanthropy too,
							
							founded and helped to maintain many institutions in the town, did a
							
							good deal in the two capitals, and in both Moscow and Petersburg was
							
							elected a member of philanthropic societies.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p102">At last, however, he began brooding over the past, and the
							
							strain of it was too much for him. Then he was attracted by a fine and
							
							intelligent girl and soon after married her, hoping that marriage
							
							would dispel his lonely depression, and that by entering on a new life
							
							and scrupulously doing his duty to his wife and children, he would
							
							escape from old memories altogether. But the very opposite of what
							
							he expected happened. He began, even in the first month of his
							
							marriage, to be continually fretted by the thought, "My wife loves me-
							
							but what if she knew?" When she first told him that she would soon
							
							bear him a child, he was troubled. "I am giving life, but I have taken
							
							life." Children came. "How dare I love them, teach and educate them,
							
							how can I talk to them of virtue? I have shed blood." They were
							
							splendid children, he longed to caress them; "and I can't look at
							
							their innocent candid faces, I am unworthy."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p103">At last he began to be bitterly and ominously haunted by the blood
							
							of his murdered victim, by the young life he had destroyed, by the
							
							blood that cried out for vengeance. He had begun to have awful dreams.
							
							But, being a man of fortitude, he bore his suffering a long time,
							
							thinking: "I shall expiate everything by this secret agony." But
							
							that hope, too, was vain; the longer it went on, the more intense
							
							was his suffering.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p104">He was respected in society for his active benevolence, though
							
							everyone was overawed by his stern and gloomy character. But the
							
							more he was respected, the more intolerable it was for him. He
							
							confessed to me that he had thoughts of killing himself. But he
							
							began to be haunted by another idea- an idea which he had at first
							
							regarded as impossible and unthinkable, though at last it got such a
							
							hold on his heart that he could not shake it off. He dreamed of rising
							
							up, going out and confessing in the face of all men that he had
							
							committed murder. For three years this dream had pursued him, haunting
							
							him in different forms. At last he believed with his whole heart
							
							that if he confessed his crime, he would heal his soul and would be at
							
							peace for ever. But this belief filled his heart with terror, for
							
							how could he carry it out? And then came what happened at my duel.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p105">"Looking at you, I have made up my mind."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p106">I looked at him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p107">"Is it possible," I cried, clasping my hands, "that such a trivial
							
							incident could give rise to a resolution in you?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p108">"My resolution has been growing for the last three years," he
							
							answered, "and your story only gave the last touch to it. Looking at
							
							you, I reproached myself and envied you." He said this to me almost
							
							sullenly.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p109">"But you won't be believed," I observed; "it's fourteen years
							
							ago."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p110">"I have proofs, great proofs. I shall show them."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p111">Then I cried and kissed him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p112">"Tell me one thing, one thing," he said (as though it all depended
							
							upon me), "my wife, my children! My wife may die of grief, and
							
							though my children won't lose their rank and property, they'll be a
							
							convict's children and for ever! And what a memory, what a memory of
							
							me I shall leave in their hearts!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p113">I said nothing.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p114">"And to part from them, to leave them for ever? It's for ever, you
							
							know, for ever!" I sat still and repeated a silent prayer. I got up at
							
							last, I felt afraid.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p115">"Well?" He looked at me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p116">"Go!" said I, "confess. Everything passes, only the truth remains.
							
							Your children will understand, when they grow up, the nobility of your
							
							resolution."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p117">He left me that time as though he had made up his mind. Yet for
							
							more than a fortnight afterwards, he came to me every evening, still
							
							preparing himself, still unable to bring himself to the point. He made
							
							my heart ache. One day he would come determined and say fervently:
							
								"I know it will be heaven for me, heaven, the moment I confess.
							
							Fourteen years I've been in hell. I want to suffer. I will take my
							
							punishment and begin to live. You can pass through the world doing
							
							wrong, but there's no turning back. Now I dare not love my neighbour
							
							nor even my own children. Good God, my children will understand,
							
							perhaps, what my punishment has cost me and will not condemn me! God
							
							is not in strength but in truth."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p118">"All will understand your sacrifice," I said to him, "if not at
							
							once, they will understand later; for you have served truth, the
							
							higher truth, not of the earth."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p119">And he would go away seeming comforted, but next day he would come
							
							again, bitter, pale, sarcastic.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p120">"Every time I come to you, you look at me so inquisitively as
							
							though to say, 'He has still not confessed!' Wait a bit, don't despise
							
							me too much. It's not such an easy thing to do as you would think.
							
							Perhaps I shall not do it at all. You won't go and inform against me
							
							then, will you?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p121">And far from looking at him with indiscreet curiosity, I was
							
							afraid to look at him at all. I was quite ill from anxiety, and my
							
							heart was full of tears. I could not sleep at night.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p122">"I have just come from my wife," he went on. "Do you understand
							
							what the word 'wife' means? When I went out, the children called to
							
							me, 'Good-bye, father, make haste back to read The Children's Magazine
							
							with us.' No, you don't understand that! No one is wise from another
							
							man's woe."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p123">His eyes were glittering, his lips were twitching. Suddenly he
							
							struck the table with his fist so that everything on it danced- it was
							
							the first time he had done such a thing, he was such a mild man.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p124">"But need I?" he exclaimed, "must I? No one has been condemned, no
							
							one has been sent to Siberia in my place, the man died of fever. And
							
							I've been punished by my sufferings for the blood I shed. And I shan't
							
							be believed, they won't believe my proofs. Need I confess, need I? I
							
							am ready to go on suffering all my life for the blood I have shed,
							
							if only my wife and children may be spared. Will it be just to ruin
							
							them with me? Aren't we making a mistake? What is right in this
							
							case? And will people recognise it, will they appreciate it, will they
							
							respect it?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p125">"Good Lord!" I thought to myself, "he is thinking of other
							
							people's respect at such a moment!" And I felt so sorry for him
							
							then, that I believe I would have shared his fate if it could have
							
							comforted him. I saw he was beside himself. I was aghast, realising
							
							with my heart as well as my mind what such a resolution meant.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p126">"Decide my fate!" he exclaimed again.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p127">"Go and confess," I whispered to him. My voice failed me, but I
							
							whispered it firmly. I took up the New Testament from the table, the
							
							Russian translation, and showed him the Gospel of St. John, chapter
							
							12, verse 24:</p><p id="ii_8-p128" />
							
							
							
											<p class="center" id="ii_8-p129">"Verily, verily, I say unto you,</p>
							
											 <p class="center" id="ii_8-p130">except a corn of wheat fall into</p>
							
											 <p class="center" id="ii_8-p131">the ground and die, it abideth alone:</p>
							
											 <p class="center" id="ii_8-p132">but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit."</p>
							
							
							
								<p id="ii_8-p133">I had just been reading that verse when he came in. He read it.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p134">"That's true," he said, he smiled bitterly. "It's terrible the
							
							things you find in those books," he said, after a pause. "It's easy
							
							enough to thrust them upon one. And who wrote them? Can they have been
							
							written by men?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p135">"The Holy Spirit wrote them," said I.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p136">"It's easy for you to prate," he smiled again, this time almost
							
							with hatred.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p137">I took the book again, opened it in another place and showed him
							
							the Epistle to the Hebrews, chapter 10, verse 31. He read:</p><p id="ii_8-p138" />
							
							
							
											 <p class="center" id="ii_8-p139">"It is a fearful thing to fall</p>
							
											  <p class="center" id="ii_8-p140">into the hands of the living God."</p><p id="ii_8-p141" />
							
							
							
								<p id="ii_8-p142">He read it and simply flung down the book. He was trembling all
							
							over.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p143">"An awful text," he said. "There's no denying you've picked out
							
							fitting ones." He rose from the chair. "Well!" he said, "good-bye,
							
							perhaps I shan't come again... we shall meet in heaven. So I have been
							
							for fourteen years 'in the hands of the living God,' that's how one
							
							must think of those fourteen years. To-morrow I will beseech those
							
							hands to let me go."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p144">I wanted to take him in my arms and kiss him, but I did not
							
							dare- his face was contorted add sombre. He went away.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p145">"Good God," I thought, "what has he gone to face!" I fell on my
							
							knees before the ikon and wept for him before the Holy Mother of
							
							God, our swift defender and helper. I was half an hour praying in
							
							tears, and it was late, about midnight. Suddenly I saw the door open
							
							and he came in again. I was surprised.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p146">Where have you been?" I asked him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p147">"I think," he said, "I've forgotten something... my
							
							handkerchief, I think.... Well, even if I've not forgotten anything,
							
							let me stay a little."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p148">He sat down. I stood over him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p149">"You sit down, too," said he.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p150">I sat down. We sat still for two minutes; he looked intently at me
							
							and suddenly smiled. I remembered that- then he got up, embraced me
							
							warmly and kissed me.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p151">"Remember," he said, "how I came to you a second time. Do you
							
							hear, remember it!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p152">And he went out.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p153">"To-morrow," I thought.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p154">And so it was. I did not know that evening that the next day was
							
							his birthday. I had not been out for the last few days, so I had no
							
							chance of hearing it from anyone. On that day he always had a great
							
							gathering, everyone in the town went to it. It was the same this time.
							
							After dinner he walked into the middle of the room, with a paper in
							
							his hand- a formal declaration to the chief of his department who
							
							was present. This declaration he read aloud to the whole assembly.
							
							It contained a full account of the crime, in every detail.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p155">"I cut myself off from men as a monster. God has visited me," he
							
							said in conclusion. "I want to suffer for my sin!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p156">Then he brought out and laid on the table all the things he had
							
							been keeping for fourteen years, that he thought would prove his
							
							crime, the jewels belonging to the murdered woman which he had
							
							stolen to divert suspicion, a cross and a locket taken from her neck
							
							with a portrait of her betrothed in the locket, her notebook and two
							
							letters; one from her betrothed, telling her that he would soon be
							
							with her, and her unfinished answer left on the table to be sent off
							
							next day. He carried off these two letters- what for? Why had he
							
							kept them for fourteen years afterwards instead of destroying them
							
							as evidence against him?
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p157">And this is what happened: everyone was amazed and horrified,
							
							everyone refused to believe it and thought that he was deranged,
							
							though all listened with intense curiosity. A few days later it was
							
							fully decided and agreed in every house that the unhappy man was
							
							mad. The legal authorities could not refuse to take the case up, but
							
							they too dropped it. Though the trinkets and letters made them ponder,
							
							they decided that even if they did turn out to be authentic, no charge
							
							could be based on those alone. Besides, she might have given him those
							
							things as a friend, or asked him to take care of them for her. I heard
							
							afterwards, however, that the genuineness of the things was proved
							
							by the friends and relations of the murdered woman, and that there was
							
							no doubt about them. Yet nothing was destined to come of it, after
							
							all.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p158">Five days later, all had heard that he was ill and that his life
							
							was in danger. The nature of his illness I can't explain; they said it
							
							was an affection of the heart. But it became known that the doctors
							
							had been induced by his wife to investigate his mental condition also,
							
							and had come to the conclusion that it was a case of insanity. I
							
							betrayed nothing, though people ran to question me. But when I
							
							wanted to visit him, I was for a long while forbidden to do so,
							
							above all by his wife.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p159">"It's you who have caused his illness," she said to me; "he was
							
							always gloomy, but for the last year people noticed that he was
							
							peculiarly excited and did strange things, and now you have been the
							
							ruin of him. Your preaching has brought him to this; for the last
							
							month he was always with you."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p160">Indeed, not only his wife but the whole town were down upon me and
							
							blamed me. "It's all your doing," they said. I was silent and indeed
							
							rejoiced at heart, for I saw plainly God's mercy to the man who had
							
							turned against himself and punished himself. I could not believe in
							
							his insanity.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p161">They let me see him at last. he insisted upon saying good-bye to
							
							me. I went in to him and saw at once, that not only his days, but
							
							his hours were numbered. He was weak, yellow, his hands trembled, he
							
							gasped for breath, but his face was full of tender and happy feeling.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p162">"It is done!" he said. "I've long been yearning to see you. Why
							
							didn't you come?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p163">I did not tell him that they would not let me see him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p164">"God has had pity on me and is calling me to Himself. I know I
							
							am dying, but I feel joy and peace for the first time after so many
							
							years. There was heaven in my heart from the moment I had done what
							
							I had to do. Now I dare to love my children and to kiss them.
							
							Neither my wife nor the judges, nor anyone has believed it. My
							
							children will never believe it either. I see in that God's mercy to
							
							them. I shall die, and my name will be without a stain for them. And
							
							now I feel God near, my heart rejoices as in Heaven... I have done
							
							my duty."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p165">He could not speak, he gasped for breath, he pressed my hand
							
							warmly, looking fervently at me. We did not talk for long, his wife
							
							kept peeping in at us. But he had time to whisper to me:
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p166">"Do you remember how I came back to you that second time, at
							
							midnight? I told you to remember it. You know what I came back for?
							
							I came to kill you!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p167">I started.
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p168">"I went out from you then into the darkness, I wandered about
							
							the streets, struggling with myself. And suddenly I hated you so
							
							that I could hardly bear it. Now, I thought, he is all that binds
							
							me, and he is my judge. I can't refuse to face my punishment
							
							to-morrow, for he knows all. It was not that I was afraid you would
							
							betray me (I never even thought of that), but I thought, 'How can I
							
							look him in the face if I don't confess?' And if you had been at the
							
							other end of the earth, but alive, it would have been all the same,
							
							the thought was unendurable that you were alive knowing everything and
							
							condemning me. I hated you as though you were the cause, as though you
							
							were to blame for everything. I came back to you then, remembering
							
							that you had a dagger lying on your table. I sat down and asked you to
							
							sit down, and for a whole minute I pondered. If I had killed you, I
							
							should have been ruined by that murder even if I had not confessed the
							
							other. But I didn't think about that at all, and I didn't want to
							
							think of it at that moment. I only hated you and longed to revenge
							
							myself on you for everything. The Lord vanquished the devil in my
							
							heart. But let me tell you, you were never nearer death."
							
								</p><p id="ii_8-p169">A week later he died. The whole town followed him to the grave.
							
							The chief priest made a speech full of feeling. All lamented the
							
							terrible illness that had cut short his days. But all the town was
							
							up in arms against me after the funeral, and people even refused to
							
							see me. Some, at first a few and afterwards more, began indeed to
							
							believe in the truth of his story, and they visited me and
							
							questioned me with great interest and eagerness, for man loves to
							
							see the downfall and disgrace of the righteous. But I held my
							
							tongue, and very shortly after, I left the town, and five months later
							
							by God's grace I entered the safe and blessed path, praising the
							
							unseen finger which had guided me so clearly to it. But I remember
							
							in my prayer to this day, the servant of God, Mihail, who suffered
							
							so greatly.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - Conversations and Exhortations of Father Zossima" prev="ii_8" next="iii_8" id="iii_7">
					
							<p class="center" id="iii_7-p1">(e) The Russian Monk and his possible Significance.</p>
													
							
								<p id="iii_7-p2">FATHERS and teachers, what is the monk? In the cultivated world
							
							the word is nowadays pronounced by some people with a jeer, and by
							
							others it is used as a term of abuse, and this contempt for the monk
							
							is growing. It is true, alas, it is true, that there are many
							
							sluggards, gluttons, profligates, and insolent beggars among monks.
							
							Educated people point to these: "You are idlers, useless members of
							
							society, you live on the labour of others, you are shameless beggars."
							
							And yet how many meek and humble monks there are, yearning for
							
							solitude and fervent prayer in peace! These are less noticed, or
							
							passed over in silence. And how suprised men would be if I were to say
							
							that from these meek monks, who yearn for solitary prayer, the
							
							salvation of Russia will come perhaps once more! For they are in truth
							
							made ready in peace and quiet "for the day and the hour, the month and
							
							the year." Meanwhile, in their solitude, they keep the image of Christ
							
							fair and undefiled, in the purity of God's truth, from the times of
							
							the Fathers of old, the Apostles and the martyrs. And when the time
							
							comes they will show it to the tottering creeds of the world. That
							
							is a great thought. That star will rise out of the East.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p3">That is my view of the monk, and is it false? Is it too proud?
							
							Look at the worldly and all who set themselves up above the people
							
							of God; has not God's image and His truth been distorted in them? They
							
							have science; but in science there is nothing but what is the object
							
							of sense. The spiritual world, the higher part of man's being is
							
							rejected altogether, dismissed with a sort of triumph, even with
							
							hatred. The world has proclaimed the reign of freedom, especially of
							
							late, but what do we see in this freedom of theirs? Nothing but
							
							slavery and self-destruction! For the world says:
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p4">"You have desires and so satisfy them, for you have the same
							
							rights as the most rich and powerful. Don't be afraid of satisfying
							
							them and even multiply your desires." That is the modern doctrine of
							
							the world. In that they see freedom. And what follows from this
							
							right of multiplication of desires? In the rich, isolation and
							
							spiritual suicide; in the poor, envy and murder; for they have been
							
							given rights, but have not been shown the means of satisfying their
							
							wants. They maintain that the world is getting more and more united,
							
							more and more bound together in brotherly community, as it overcomes
							
							distance and sets thoughts flying through the air.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p5">Alas, put no faith in such a bond of union. Interpreting freedom
							
							as the multiplication and rapid satisfaction of desires, men distort
							
							their own nature, for many senseless and foolish desires and habits
							
							and ridiculous fancies are fostered in them. They live only for mutual
							
							envy, for luxury and ostentation. To have dinners visits, carriages,
							
							rank, and slaves to wait on one is looked upon as a necessity, for
							
							which life, honour and human feeling are sacrificed, and men even
							
							commit suicide if they are unable to satisfy it. We see the same thing
							
							among those who are not rich, while the poor drown their unsatisfied
							
							need and their envy in drunkenness. But soon they will drink blood
							
							instead of wine, they are being led on to it. I ask you is such a
							
							man free? I knew one "champion of freedom" who told me himself that,
							
							when he was deprived of tobacco in prison, he was so wretched at the
							
							privation that he almost went and betrayed his cause for the sake of
							
							getting tobacco again! And such a man says, "I am fighting for the
							
							cause of humanity."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p6">How can such a one fight? What is he fit for? He is capable
							
							perhaps of some action quickly over, but he cannot hold out long.
							
							And it's no wonder that instead of gaining freedom they have sunk into
							
							slavery, and instead of serving, the cause of brotherly love and the
							
							union of humanity have fallen, on the contrary, into dissension and
							
							isolation, as my mysterious visitor and teacher said to me in my
							
							youth. And therefore the idea of the service of humanity, of brotherly
							
							love and the solidarity of mankind, is more and more dying out in
							
							the world, and indeed this idea is sometimes treated with derision.
							
							For how can a man shake off his habits? What can become of him if he
							
							is in such bondage to the habit of satisfying the innumerable
							
							desires he has created for himself? He is isolated, and what concern
							
							has he with the rest of humanity? They have succeeded in
							
							accumulating a greater mass of objects, but the joy in the world has
							
							grown less.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p7">The monastic way is very different. Obedience, fasting, and prayer
							
							are laughed at, yet only through them lies the way to real, true
							
							freedom. I cut off my superfluous and unnecessary desires, I subdue my
							
							proud and wanton will and chastise it with obedience, and with God's
							
							help I attain freedom of spirit and with it spiritual joy. Which is
							
							most capable of conceiving a great idea and serving it- the rich in
							
							his isolation or the man who has freed himself from the tyranny of
							
							material things and habits? The monk is reproached for his solitude,
							
							"You have secluded yourself within the walls of the monastery for your
							
							own salvation, and have forgotten the brotherly service of
							
							humanity!" But we shall see which will be most zealous in the cause of
							
							brotherly love. For it is not we, but they, who are in isolation,
							
							though they don't see that. Of old, leaders of the people came from
							
							among us, and why should they not again? The same meek and humble
							
							ascetics will rise up and go out to work for the great cause. The
							
							salvation of Russia comes from the people. And the Russian monk has
							
							always been on the side of the people. We are isolated only if the
							
							people are isolated. The people believe as we do, and an unbelieving
							
							reformer will never do anything in Russia, even if he is sincere in
							
							heart and a genius. Remember that! The people will meet the atheist
							
							and overcome him, and Russia will be one and orthodox. Take care of
							
							the peasant and guard his heart. Go on educating him quietly. That's
							
							your duty as monks, for the peasant has God in his heart.</p><p id="iii_7-p8" />
							
							
							
									 <p class="center" id="iii_7-p9">(f) Of Masters and Servants, and of whether it is</p>
							
										 <p class="center" id="iii_7-p10">possible for them to be Brothers in the Spirit.</p><p id="iii_7-p11" /><p id="iii_7-p12">
							
							
							
								Of course, I don't deny that there is sin in the peasants too. And
							
							the fire of corruption is spreading visibly, hourly, working from
							
							above downwards. The spirit of isolation is coming upon the people
							
							too. Money-lenders and devourers of the commune are rising up. Already
							
							the merchant grows more and more eager for rank, and strives to show
							
							himself cultured though he has not a trace of culture, and to this end
							
							meanly despises his old traditions, and is even ashamed of the faith
							
							of his fathers. He visits princes, though he is only a peasant
							
							corrupted. The peasants are rotting in drunkenness and cannot shake
							
							off the habit. And what cruelty to their wives, to their children
							
							even! All from drunkenness! I've seen in the factories children of
							
							nine years old, frail, rickety, bent and already depraved. The
							
							stuffy workshop, the din of machinery, work all day long, the vile
							
							language and the drink, the drink- is that what a little child's heart
							
							needs? He needs sunshine, childish play, good examples all about
							
							him, and at least a little love. There must be no more of this, monks,
							
							no more torturing of children, rise up and preach that, make haste,
							
							make haste!
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p13">But God will save Russia, for though the peasants are corrupted
							
							and cannot renounce their filthy sin, yet they know it is cursed by
							
							God and that they do wrong in sinning. So that our people still
							
							believe in righteousness, have faith in God and weep tears of
							
							devotion.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p14">It is different with the upper classes. They, following science,
							
							want to base justice on reason alone, but not with Christ, as
							
							before, and they have already proclaimed that there is no crime,
							
							that there is no sin. And that's consistent, for if you have no God
							
							what is the meaning of crime? In Europe the people are already
							
							rising up against the rich with violence, and the leaders of the
							
							people are everywhere leading them to bloodshed, and teaching them
							
							that their wrath is righteous. But their "wrath is accursed, for it is
							
							cruel." But God will save Russia as He has saved her many times.
							
							Salvation will come from the people, from their faith and their
							
							meekness.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p15">Fathers and teachers, watch over the people's faith and this
							
							will not be a dream. I've been struck all my life in our great
							
							people by their dignity, their true and seemly dignity. I've seen it
							
							myself, I can testify to it, I've seen it and marvelled at it, I've
							
							seen it in spite of the degraded sins and poverty-stricken
							
							appearance of our peasantry. They are not servile, and even after
							
							two centuries of serfdom they are free in manner and bearing, yet
							
							without insolence, and not revengeful and not envious. "You are rich
							
							and noble, you are clever and talented, well, be so, God bless you.
							
							I respect you, but I know that I too am a man. By the very fact that I
							
							respect you without envy I prove my dignity as a man."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p16">In truth if they don't say this (for they don't know how to say
							
							this yet), that is how they act. I have seen it myself, I have known
							
							it myself, and, would you believe it, the poorer our Russian peasant
							
							is, the more noticeable is that serene goodness, for the rich among
							
							them are for the most part corrupted already, and much of that is
							
							due to our carelessness and indifference. But God will save His
							
							people, for Russia is great in her humility. I dream of seeing, and
							
							seem to see clearly already, our future. It will come to pass that
							
							even the most corrupt of our rich will end by being ashamed of his
							
							riches before the poor, and the poor, seeing his humility, will
							
							understand and give way before him, will respond joyfully and kindly
							
							to his honourable shame. Believe me that it will end in that; things
							
							are moving to that. Equality is to be found only in the spiritual
							
							dignity of man, and that will only be understood among us. If we
							
							were brothers, there would be fraternity, but before that they will
							
							never agree about the division of wealth. We preserve the image of
							
							Christ, and it will shine forth like a precious diamond to the whole
							
							world. So may it be, so may it be!
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p17">Fathers and teachers, a touching incident befell me once. In my
							
							wanderings I met in the town of K. my old orderly, Afanasy. It was
							
							eight years since I had parted from him. He chanced to see me in the
							
							market-place, recognised me, ran up to me, and how delighted he was!
							
							He simply pounced on me: "Master dear, is it you? Is it really you I
							
							see?" He took me home with him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p18">He was no longer in the army, he was married and already had two
							
							little children. He and his wife earned their living as
							
							costermongers in the market-place. His room was poor, but bright and
							
							clean. He made me sit down, set the samovar, sent for his wife, as
							
							though my appearance were a festival for them. He brought me his
							
							children: "Bless them, Father."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p19">"Is it for me to bless them? I am only a humble monk. I will
							
							pray for them. And for you, Afanasy Pavlovitch, I have prayed every
							
							day since that day, for it all came from you," said I. And I explained
							
							that to him as well as I could. And what do you think? The man kept
							
							gazing at me and could not believe that I, his former master, an
							
							officer, was now before him in such a guise and position; it made
							
							him shed tears.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p20">"Why are you weeping?" said I, "better rejoice over me, dear
							
							friend, whom I can never forget, for my path is a glad and joyful
							
							one."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p21">He did not say much, but kept sighing and shaking his head over me
							
							tenderly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p22">"What has become of your fortune?" he asked.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p23">"I gave it to the monastery," I answered; "we live in common."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p24">After tea I began saying good-bye, and suddenly he brought out
							
							half a rouble as an offering to the monastery, and another half-rouble
							
							I saw him thrusting hurriedly into my hand: "That's for you in your
							
							wanderings, it may be of use to you, Father."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p25">I took his half-rouble, bowed to him and his wife, and went out
							
							rejoicing. And on my way I thought: "Here we are both now, he at
							
							home and I on the road, sighing and shaking our heads, no doubt, and
							
							yet smiling joyfully in the gladness of our hearts, remembering how
							
							God brought about our meeting."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p26">I have never seen him again since then. I had been his master
							
							and he my servant, but now when we exchanged a loving kiss with
							
							softened hearts, there was a great human bond between us. I have
							
							thought a great deal about that, and now what I think is this: Is it
							
							so inconceivable that that grand and simple-hearted unity might in due
							
							time become universal among the Russian people? I believe that it will
							
							come to pass and that the time is at hand.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p27">And of servants I will add this: In old days when I was young I
							
							was often angry with servants; "the cook had served something too hot,
							
							the orderly had not brushed my clothes." But what taught me better
							
							then was a thought of my dear brother's, which I had heard from him in
							
							childhood: "Am I worth it, that another should serve me and be ordered
							
							about by me in his poverty and ignorance?" And I wondered at the
							
							time that such simple and self-evident ideas should be so slow to
							
							occur to our minds.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p28">t is impossible that there should be no servants in the world,
							
							but act so that your servant may be freer in spirit than if he were
							
							not a servant. And why cannot I be a servant to my servant and even
							
							let him see it, and that without any pride on my part or any
							
							mistrust on his? Why should not my servant be like my own kindred,
							
							so that I may take him into my family and rejoice in doing so? Even
							
							now this can be done, but it will lead to the grand unity of men in
							
							the future, when a man will not seek servants for himself, or desire
							
							to turn his fellow creatures into servants as he does now, but on
							
							the contrary, will long with his whole heart to be the servant of all,
							
							as the Gospel teaches.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p29">And can it be a dream, that in the end man will find his joy
							
							only in deeds of light and mercy, and not in cruel pleasures as now,
							
							in gluttony, fornication, ostentation, boasting and envious rivalry of
							
							one with the other? I firmly believe that it is not and that the
							
							time is at hand. People laugh and ask: "When will that time come and
							
							does it look like coming?" I believe that with Christ's help we
							
							shall accomplish this great thing. And how many ideas there have
							
							been on earth in the history of man which were unthinkable ten years
							
							before they appeared! Yet when their destined hour had come, they came
							
							forth and spread over the whole earth. So it will be with us, and
							
							our people will shine forth in the world, and all men will say: "The
							
							stone which the builders rejected has become the cornerstone of the
							
							building."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p30">And we may ask the scornful themselves: If our hope is a dream,
							
							when will you build up your edifice and order things justly by your
							
							intellect alone, without Christ? If they declare that it is they who
							
							are advancing towards unity, only the most simple-hearted among them
							
							believe it, so that one may positively marvel at such simplicity. Of a
							
							truth, they have more fantastic dreams than we. They aim at justice,
							
							but, denying Christ, they will end by flooding the earth with blood,
							
							for blood cries out for blood, and he that taketh up the sword shall
							
							perish by the sword. And if it were not for Christ's covenant, they
							
							would slaughter one another down to the last two men on earth. And
							
							those two last men would not be able to restrain each other in their
							
							pride, and the one would slay the other and then himself. And that
							
							would come to pass, were it not for the promise of Christ that for the
							
							sake of the humble and meek the days shall be shortened.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p31">While I was still wearing an officer's uniform after my duel, I
							
							talked about servants in general society, and I remember everyone
							
							was amazed at me. "What!" they asked, "are we to make our servants sit
							
							down on the sofa and offer them tea?" And I answered them: "Why not,
							
							sometimes at least?" Everyone laughed. Their question was frivolous
							
							and my answer was not clear; but the thought in it was to some
							
							extent right.</p><p id="iii_7-p32" />
							
							
							
								   <p class="center" id="iii_7-p33">(g) Of Prayer, of Love, and of Contact with other Worlds.</p><p id="iii_7-p34" /><p id="iii_7-p35">
							
							
							
								Young man, be not forgetful of prayer. Every time you pray, if
							
							your prayer is sincere, there will be new feeling and new meaning in
							
							it, which will give you fresh courage, and you will understand that
							
							prayer is an education. Remember, too, every day, and whenever you
							
							can, repeat to yourself, "Lord, have mercy on all who appear before
							
							Thee to-day." For every hour and every moment thousands of men leave
							
							life on this earth, and their souls appear before God. And how many of
							
							them depart in solitude, unknown, sad, dejected that no one mourns for
							
							them or even knows whether they have lived or not! And behold, from
							
							the other end of the earth perhaps, your prayer for their rest will
							
							rise up to God though you knew them not nor they you. How touching
							
							it must be to a soul standing in dread before the Lord to feel at that
							
							instant that, for him too, there is one to pray, that there is a
							
							fellow creature left on earth to love him too! And God will look on
							
							you both more graciously, for if you have had so much pity on him, how
							
							much will He have pity Who is infinitely more loving and merciful than
							
							you! And He will forgive him for your sake.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p36">Brothers, have no fear of men's sin. Love a man even in his sin,
							
							for that is the semblance of Divine Love and is the highest love on
							
							earth. Love all God's creation, the whole and every grain of sand in
							
							it. Love every leaf, every ray of God's light. Love the animals,
							
							love the plants, love everything. If you love everything, you will
							
							perceive the divine mystery in things. Once you perceive it, you
							
							will begin to comprehend it better every day. And you will come at
							
							last to love the whole world with an all-embracing love. Love the
							
							animals: God has given them the rudiments of thought and joy
							
							untroubled. Do not trouble it, don't harass them, don't deprive them
							
							of their happiness, don't work against God's intent. Man, do not pride
							
							yourself on superiority to the animals; they are without sin, and you,
							
							with your greatness, defile the earth by your appearance on it, and
							
							leave the traces of your foulness after you- alas, it is true of
							
							almost every one of us! Love children especially, for they too are
							
							sinless like the angels; they live to soften and purify our hearts
							
							and, as it were, to guide us. Woe to him who offends a child! Father
							
							Anfim taught me to love children. The kind, silent man used often on
							
							our wanderings to spend the farthings given us on sweets and cakes for
							
							the children. He could not pass by a child without emotion. That's the
							
							nature of the man.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p37">At some thoughts one stands perplexed, especially at the sight
							
							of men's sin, and wonders whether one should use force or humble love.
							
							Always decide to use humble love. If you resolve on that once for all,
							
							you may subdue the whole world. Loving humility is marvellously
							
							strong, the strongest of all things, and there is nothing else like
							
							it.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p38">Every day and every hour, every minute, walk round yourself and
							
							watch yourself, and see that your image is a seemly one. You pass by a
							
							little child, you pass by, spiteful, with ugly words, with wrathful
							
							heart; you may not have noticed the child, but he has seen you, and
							
							your image, unseemly and ignoble, may remain in his defenceless heart.
							
							You don't know it, but you may have sown an evil seed in him and it
							
							may grow, and all because you were not careful before the child,
							
							because you did not foster in yourself a careful, actively
							
							benevolent love. Brothers, love is a teacher; but one must know how to
							
							acquire it, for it is hard to acquire, it is dearly bought, it is
							
							won slowly by long labour. For we must love not only occasionally, for
							
							a moment, but for ever. Everyone can love occasionally, even the
							
							wicked can.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p39">My brother asked the birds to forgive him; that sounds
							
							senseless, but it is right; for all is like an ocean, all is flowing
							
							and blending; a touch in one place sets up movement at the other end
							
							of the earth. It may be senseless to beg forgiveness of the birds, but
							
							birds would be happier at your side- a little happier, anyway- and
							
							children and all animals, if you were nobler than you are now. It's
							
							all like an ocean, I tell you. Then you would pray to the birds too,
							
							consumed by an all-embracing love, in a sort of transport, and pray
							
							that they too will forgive you your sin. Treasure this ecstasy,
							
							however senseless it may seem to men.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p40">My friends, pray to God for gladness. Be glad as children, as
							
							the birds of heaven. And let not the sin of men confound you in your
							
							doings. Fear not that it will wear away your work and hinder its being
							
							accomplished. Do not say, "Sin is mighty, wickedness is mighty, evil
							
							environment is mighty, and we are lonely and helpless, and evil
							
							environment is wearing us away and hindering our good work from
							
							being done." Fly from that dejection, children! There is only one
							
							means of salvation, then take yourself and make yourself responsible
							
							for all men's sins, that is the truth, you know, friends, for as
							
							soon as you sincerely make yourself responsible for everything and for
							
							all men, you will see at once that it is really so, and that you are
							
							to blame for everyone and for all things. But throwing your own
							
							indolence and impotence on others you will end by sharing the pride of
							
							Satan and murmuring against God.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p41">Of the pride of Satan what I think is this: it is hard for us on
							
							earth to comprehend it, and therefore it is so easy to fall into error
							
							and to share it, even imagining that we are doing something grand
							
							and fine. Indeed, many of the strongest feelings and movements of
							
							our nature we cannot comprehend on earth. Let not that be a
							
							stumbling-block, and think not that it may serve as a justification to
							
							you for anything. For the Eternal judge asks of you what you can
							
							comprehend and not what you cannot. You will know that yourself
							
							hereafter, for you will behold all things truly then and will not
							
							dispute them. On earth, indeed, we are, as it were, astray, and if
							
							it were not for the precious image of Christ before us, we should be
							
							undone and altogether lost, as was the human race before the flood.
							
							Much on earth is hidden from us, but to make up for that we have
							
							been given a precious mystic sense of our living bond with the other
							
							world, with the higher heavenly world, and the roots of our thoughts
							
							and feelings are not here but in other worlds. That is why the
							
							philosophers say that we cannot apprehend the reality of things on
							
							earth.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p42">God took seeds from different worlds and sowed them on this earth,
							
							and His garden grew up and everything came up that could come up,
							
							but what grows lives and is alive only through the feeling of its
							
							contact with other mysterious worlds. If that feeling grows weak or is
							
							destroyed in you, the heavenly growth will die away in you. Then you
							
							will be indifferent to life and even grow to hate it. That's what I
							
							think.</p><p id="iii_7-p43" />
							
							
							
								  <p class="center" id="iii_7-p44">(h) Can a Man judge his Fellow Creatures?  Faith to the End.</p><p id="iii_7-p45" /><p id="iii_7-p46">
							
							
							
								Remember particularly that you cannot be a judge of anyone. For no
							
							one can judge a criminal until he recognises that he is just such a
							
							criminal as the man standing before him, and that he perhaps is more
							
							than all men to blame for that crime. When he understands that, he
							
							will be able to be a judge. Though that sounds absurd, it is true.
							
							If I had been righteous myself, perhaps there would have been no
							
							criminal standing before me. If you can take upon yourself the crime
							
							of the criminal your heart is judging, take it at once, suffer for him
							
							yourself, and let him go without reproach. And even if the law
							
							itself makes you his judge, act in the same spirit so far as possible,
							
							for he will go away and condemn himself more bitterly than you have
							
							done. If, after your kiss, he goes away untouched, mocking at you,
							
							do not let that be a stumbling-block to you. It shows his time has not
							
							yet come, but it will come in due course. And if it come not, no
							
							Matter; if not he, then another in his place will understand and
							
							suffer, and judge and condemn himself, and the truth will be
							
							fulfilled. Believe that, believe it without doubt; for in that lies
							
							all the hope and faith of the saints.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p47">Work without ceasing. If you remember in the night as you go to
							
							sleep, "I have not done what I ought to have done," rise up at once
							
							and do it. If the people around you are spiteful and callous and
							
							will not hear you, fall down before them and beg their forgiveness;
							
							for in truth you are to blame for their not wanting to hear you. And
							
							if you cannot speak to them in their bitterness, serve them in silence
							
							and in humility, never losing hope. If all men abandon you and even
							
							drive you away by force, then when you are left alone fall on the
							
							earth and kiss it, water it with your tears and it will bring forth
							
							fruit even though no one has seen or heard you in your solitude.
							
							Believe to the end, even if all men went astray and you were left
							
							the only one faithful; bring your offering even then and praise God in
							
							your loneliness. And if two of you are gathered together- then there
							
							is a whole world, a world of living love. Embrace each other
							
							tenderly and praise God, for if only in you two His truth has been
							
							fulfilled.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p48">If you sin yourself and grieve even unto death for your sins or
							
							for your sudden sin, then rejoice for others, rejoice for the
							
							righteous man, rejoice that if you have sinned, he is righteous and
							
							has not sinned.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p49">If the evil-doing of men moves you to indignation and overwhelming
							
							distress, even to a desire for vengeance on the evil-doers, shun above
							
							all things that feeling. Go at once and seek suffering for yourself,
							
							as though you were yourself guilty of that wrong. Accept that
							
							suffering and bear it and your heart will find comfort, and you will
							
							understand that you too are guilty, for you might have been a light to
							
							the evil-doers, even as the one man sinless, and you were not a
							
							light to them. If you had been a light, you would have lightened the
							
							path for others too, and the evil-doer might perhaps have been saved
							
							by your light from his sin. And even though your light was shining,
							
							yet you see men were not saved by it, hold firm and doubt not the
							
							power of the heavenly light. Believe that if they were not saved, they
							
							will be saved hereafter. And if they are not saved hereafter, then
							
							their sons will be saved, for your light will not die even when you
							
							are dead. The righteous man departs, but his light remains. Men are
							
							always saved after the death of the deliverer. Men reject their
							
							prophets and slay them, but they love their martyrs and honour those
							
							whom they have slain. You are working for the whole, are acting for
							
							the future. Seek no reward, for great is your reward on this earth:
							
							the spiritual joy which is only vouchsafed to the righteous man.
							
							Fear not the great nor the mighty, but be wise and ever serene. Know
							
							the measure, know the times, study that. When you are left alone,
							
							pray. Love to throw yourself on the earth and kiss it. Kiss the
							
							earth and love it with an unceasing, consuming love. Love all men,
							
							love everything. Seek that rapture and ecstasy. Water the earth with
							
							the tears of your joy and love those tears. Don't be ashamed of that
							
							ecstasy, prize it, for it is a gift of God and a great one; it is
							
							not given to many but only to the elect.</p><p id="iii_7-p50" />
							
							
							
									   <p class="center" id="iii_7-p51">(i) Of Hell and Hell Fire, a Mystic Reflection.</p><p id="iii_7-p52" /><p id="iii_7-p53">
							
							
							
								Fathers and teachers, I ponder, "What is hell?" I maintain that it
							
							is the suffering of being unable to love. Once in infinite
							
							existence, immeasurable in time and space, a spiritual creature was
							
							given on his coming to earth the power of saying, "I am and I love."
							
							Once, only once, there was given him a moment of active lifting
							
							love, and for that was earthly life given him, and with it times and
							
							seasons. And that happy creature rejected the priceless gift, prized
							
							it and loved it not, scorned it and remained callous. Such a one,
							
							having left the earth, sees Abraham's bosom and talks with Abraham
							
							as we are told in the parable of the rich man and Lazarus, and beholds
							
							heaven and can go up to the Lord. But that is just his torment, to
							
							rise up to the Lord without ever having loved, to be brought close
							
							to those who have loved when he has despised their love. For he sees
							
							clearly and says to himself, "Now I have understanding, and though I
							
							now thirst to love, there will be nothing great, no sacrifice in my
							
							love, for my earthly life is over, and Abraham will not come even with
							
							a drop of living water (that is the gift of earthly active life) to
							
							cool the fiery thirst of spiritual love which burns in me now,
							
							though I despised it on earth; there is no more life for me and will
							
							be no more time! Even though I would gladly give my life for others,
							
							it can never be, for that life is passed which can be sacrificed for
							
							love, and now there is a gulf fixed between that life and this
							
							existence."
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p54">They talk of hell fire in the material sense. I don't go into that
							
							mystery and I shun it. But I think if there were fire in material
							
							sense, they would be glad of it, for I imagine that in material agony,
							
							their still greater spiritual agony would be forgotten for a moment.
							
							Moreover, that spiritual agony cannot be taken from them, for that
							
							suffering is not external but within them. And if it could be taken
							
							from them, I think it would be bitterer still for the unhappy
							
							creatures. For even if the righteous in Paradise forgave them,
							
							beholding their torments, and called them up to heaven in their
							
							infinite love, they would only multiply their torments, for they would
							
							arouse in them still more keenly a flaming thirst for responsive,
							
							active and grateful love which is now impossible. In the timidity of
							
							my heart I imagine, however, that the very recognition of this
							
							impossibility would serve at last to console them. For accepting the
							
							love of the righteous together with the impossibility of repaying
							
							it, by this submissiveness and the effect of this humility, they
							
							will attain at last, as it were, to a certain semblance of that active
							
							love which they scorned in life, to something like its outward
							
							expression... I am sorry, friends and brothers, that I cannot
							
							express this clearly. But woe to those who have slain themselves on
							
							earth, woe to the suicides! I believe that there can be none more
							
							miserable than they. They tell us that it is a sin to pray for them
							
							and outwardly the Church, as it were, renounces them, but in my secret
							
							heart I believe that we may pray even for them. Love can never be an
							
							offence to Christ. For such as those I have prayed inwardly all my
							
							life, I confess it, fathers and teachers, and even now I pray for them
							
							every day.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p55">Oh, there are some who remain proud and fierce even in hell, in
							
							spite of their certain knowledge and contemplation of the absolute
							
							truth; there are some fearful ones who have given themselves over to
							
							Satan and his proud spirit entirely. For such, hell is voluntary and
							
							ever consuming; they are tortured by their own choice. For they have
							
							cursed themselves, cursing God and life. They live upon their
							
							vindictive pride like a starving man in the desert sucking blood out
							
							of his own body. But they are never satisfied, and they refuse
							
							forgiveness, they curse God Who calls them. They cannot behold the
							
							living God without hatred, and they cry out that the God of life
							
							should be annihilated, that God should destroy Himself and His own
							
							creation. And they will burn in the fire of their own wrath for ever
							
							and yearn for death and annihilation. But they will not attain to
							
							death....
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p56">Here Alexey Fyodorovitch Karamazov's manuscript ends. I repeat, it
							
							is incomplete and fragmentary. Biographical details, for instance,
							
							cover only Father Zossima's earliest youth. Of his teaching and
							
							opinions we find brought together sayings evidently uttered on very
							
							different occasions. His utterances during the last few hours have not
							
							been kept separate from the rest, but their general character can be
							
							gathered from what we have in Alexey Fyodorovitch's manuscript.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p57">The elder's death came in the end quite unexpectedly. For although
							
							those who were gathered about him that last evening realised that
							
							his death was approaching, yet it was difficult to imagine that it
							
							would come so suddenly. On the contrary, his friends, as I observed
							
							already, seeing him that night apparently so cheerful and talkative,
							
							were convinced that there was at least a temporary change for the
							
							better in his condition. Even five minutes before his death, they said
							
							afterwards wonderingly, it was impossible to foresee it. He seemed
							
							suddenly to feel an acute pain in his chest, he turned pale and
							
							pressed his hands to his heart. All rose from their seats and hastened
							
							to him. But though suffering, he still looked at them with a smile,
							
							sank slowly from his chair on to his knees, then bowed his face to the
							
							ground, stretched out his arms and as though in joyful ecstasy,
							
							praying and kissing the ground, quietly and joyfully gave up his
							
							soul to God.
							
								</p><p id="iii_7-p58">The news of his death spread at once through the hermitage and
							
							reached the monastery. The nearest friends of the deceased and those
							
							whose duty it was from their position began to lay out the corpse
							
							according to the ancient ritual, and all the monks gathered together
							
							in the church. And before dawn the news of the death reached the town.
							
							By the morning all the town was talking of the event, and crowds
							
							were flocking from the town to the monastery. But this subject will be
							
							treated in the next book; I will only add here that before a day had
							
							passed something happened so unexpected, so strange, upsetting, and
							
							bewildering in its effect on the monks and the townspeople, that after
							
							all these years, that day of general suspense is still vividly
							
							remembered in the town.	</p>				
					
					
					</div4>
				</div3>		
			</div2>

<div2 title="PART III" prev="iii_7" next="i_10" id="iii_8">

<div3 title="Book VII - Alyosha" prev="iii_8" next="i_11" id="i_10">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - The Breath of Corruption" prev="i_10" next="ii_9" id="i_11">
					
							<p id="i_11-p1">THE body of Father Zossima was prepared for burial according to
							
							the established Ritual. As is well known, the bodies of dead monks and
							
							hermits are not washed. In the words of the Church Ritual: "If any one
							
							of the monks depart in the Lord, the monk designated (that is, whose
							
							office it is) shall wipe the body with warm water, making first the
							
							sign of the cross with a sponge on the forehead of the deceased, on
							
							the breast, on the hands and feet and on the knees, and that is
							
							enough." All this was done by Father Paissy, who then clothed the
							
							deceased in his monastic garb and wrapped him in his cloak, which was,
							
							according to custom, somewhat slit to allow of its being folded
							
							about him in the form of a cross. On his head he put a hood with an
							
							eight-cornered cross. The hood was left open and the dead man's face
							
							was covered with black gauze. In his hands was put an ikon of the
							
							Saviour. Towards morning he was put in the coffin which had been
							
							made ready long before. It was decided to leave the coffin all day
							
							in the cell, in the larger room in which the elder used to receive his
							
							visitors and fellow monks. As the deceased was a priest and monk of
							
							the strictest rule, the Gospel, not the Psalter, had to be read over
							
							his body by monks in holy orders. The reading was begun by Father
							
							Iosif immediately after the requiem service. Father Paissy desired
							
							later on to read the Gospel all day and night over his dead friend,
							
							but for the present he, as well as the Father Superintendent of the
							
							Hermitage, was very busy and occupied, for something extraordinary, an
							
							unheard-of, even "unseemly" excitement and impatient expectation began
							
							to be apparent in the monks, and the visitors from the monastery
							
							hostels, and the crowds of people flocking from the town. And as
							
							time went on, this grew more and more marked. Both the
							
							Superintendent and Father Paissy did their utmost to calm the
							
							general bustle and agitation.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p2">When it was fully daylight, some people began bringing their sick,
							
							in most cases children, with them from the town- as though they had
							
							been waiting expressly for this moment to do so, evidently persuaded
							
							that the dead elder's remains had a power of healing, which would be
							
							immediately made manifest in accordance with their faith. It was
							
							only then apparent how unquestionably everyone in our town had
							
							accepted Father Zossima during his lifetime as a great saint. And
							
							those who came were far from being all of the humbler classes.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p3">This intense expectation on the part of believers displayed with
							
							such haste, such openness, even with impatience and almost insistence,
							
							impressed Father Paissy as unseemly. Though he had long foreseen
							
							something of the sort, the actual manifestation of the feeling was
							
							beyond anything he had looked for. When he came across any of the
							
							monks who displayed this excitement, Father Paissy began to reprove
							
							them. "Such immediate expectation of something extraordinary," he
							
							said, "shows a levity, possible to worldly people but unseemly in us."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p4">But little attention was paid him and Father Paissy noticed it
							
							uneasily. Yet he himself (if the whole truth must be told), secretly
							
							at the bottom of his heart, cherished almost the same hopes and
							
							could not but be aware of it, though he was indignant at the too
							
							impatient expectation around him, and saw in it light-mindedness and
							
							vanity. Nevertheless, it was particularly unpleasant to him to meet
							
							certain persons, whose presence aroused in him great misgivings. In
							
							the crowd in the dead man's cell he noticed with inward aversion
							
							(for which he immediately reproached himself) the presence of
							
							Rakitin and of the monk from Obdorsk, who was still staying in the
							
							monastery. Of both of them Father Paissy felt for some reason suddenly
							
							suspicious- though, indeed, he might well have felt the same about
							
							others.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p5">The monk from Obdorsk was conspicuous as the most fussy in the
							
							excited crowd. He was to be seen everywhere; everywhere he was
							
							asking questions, everywhere he was listening, on all sides he was
							
							whispering with a peculiar, mysterious air. His expression showed
							
							the greatest impatience and even a sort of irritation.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p6">As for Rakitin, he, as appeared later, had come so early to the
							
							hermitage at the special request of Madame Hohlakov. As soon as that
							
							good-hearted but weak-minded woman, who could not herself have been
							
							admitted to the hermitage, waked and heard of the death of Father
							
							Zossima, she was overtaken with such intense curiosity that she
							
							promptly despatched Rakitin to the hermitage, to keep a careful look
							
							out and report to her by letter ever half hour or so "everything
							
							that takes place." She regarded Rakitin as a most religious and devout
							
							young man. He was particularly clever in getting round people and
							
							assuming whatever part he thought most to their taste, if he
							
							detected the slightest advantage to himself from doing so.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p7">It was a bright, clear day, and many of the visitors were
							
							thronging about the tombs, which were particularly numerous round
							
							the church and scattered here and there about the hermitage. As he
							
							walked round the hermitage, Father Paissy remembered Alyosha and
							
							that he had not seen him for some time, not since the night. And he
							
							had no sooner thought of him than he at once noticed him in the
							
							farthest corner of the hermitage garden, sitting on the tombstone of a
							
							monk who had been famous long ago for his saintliness. He sat with his
							
							back to the hermitage and his face to the wall, and seemed to be
							
							hiding behind the tombstone. Going up to him, Father Paissy saw that
							
							he was weeping quietly but bitterly, with his face hidden in his
							
							hands, and that his whole frame was shaking with sobs. Father Paissy
							
							stood over him for a little.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p8">"Enough, dear son, enough, dear," he pronounced with feeling at
							
							last. "Why do you weep? Rejoice and weep not. Don't you know that this
							
							is the greatest of his days? Think only where he is now, at this
							
							moment!"
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p9">Alyosha glanced at him, uncovering his face, which was swollen
							
							with crying like a child's, but turned away at once without uttering a
							
							word and hid his face in his hands again.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p10">"Maybe it is well," said Father Paissy thoughtfully; "weep if
							
							you must; Christ has sent you those tears."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p11">"Your touching tears are but a relief to your spirit and will
							
							serve to gladden your dear heart," he added to himself, walking away
							
							from Alyosha, and thinking lovingly of him. He moved away quickly,
							
							however, for he felt that he too might weep looking at him.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p12">Meanwhile the time was passing; the monastery services and the
							
							requiems for the dead followed in their due course. Father Paissy
							
							again took Father Iosif's place by the coffin and began reading the
							
							Gospel. But before three o'clock in the afternoon that something
							
							took place to which I alluded at the end of the last book, something
							
							so unexpected by all of us and so contrary to the general hope,
							
							that, I repeat, this trivial incident has been minutely remembered
							
							to this day in our town and all the surrounding neighbourhood. I may
							
							add here, for myself personally, that I feel it almost repulsive
							
							that event which caused such frivolous agitation and was such a
							
							stumbling-block to many, though in reality it was the most natural and
							
							trivial matter. I should, of course, have omitted all mention of it in
							
							my story, if it had not exerted a very strong influence on the heart
							
							and soul of the chief, though future, hero of my story, Alyosha,
							
							forming a crisis and turning-point in his spiritual development,
							
							giving a shock to his intellect, which finally strengthened it for the
							
							rest of his life and gave it a definite aim.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p13">And so, to return to our story. When before dawn they laid
							
							Father Zossima's body in the coffin and brought it into the front
							
							room, the question of opening the windows was raised among those who
							
							were around the coffin. But this suggestion made casually by someone
							
							was unanswered and almost unnoticed. Some of those present may perhaps
							
							have inwardly noticed it, only to reflect that the anticipation of
							
							decay and corruption from the body of such a saint was an actual
							
							absurdity, calling for compassion (if not a smile) for the lack of
							
							faith and the frivolity it implied. For they expected something
							
							quite different.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p14">And, behold, soon after midday there were signs of something, at
							
							first only observed in silence by those who came in and out and were
							
							evidently each afraid to communicate the thought in his mind. But by
							
							three o'clock those signs had become so clear and unmistakable, that
							
							the news swiftly reached all the monks and visitors in the
							
							hermitage, promptly penetrated to the monastery, throwing all the
							
							monks into amazement, and finally, in the shortest possible time,
							
							spread to the town, exciting everyone in it, believers and unbelievers
							
							alike. The unbelievers rejoiced, and as for the believers some of them
							
							rejoiced even more than the unbelievers, for "men love the downfall
							
							and disgrace of the righteous," as the deceased elder had said in
							
							one of his exhortations.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p15">The fact is that a smell of decomposition began to come from the
							
							coffin, growing gradually more marked, and by three o'clock it was
							
							quite unmistakable. In all the past history of our monastery, no
							
							such scandal could be recalled, and in no other circumstances could
							
							such a scandal have been possible, as showed itself in unseemly
							
							disorder immediately after this discovery among the very monks
							
							themselves. Afterwards, even many years afterwards, some sensible
							
							monks were amazed and horrified, when they recalled that day, that the
							
							scandal could have reached such proportions. For in the past, monks of
							
							very holy life had died, God-fearing old men, whose saintliness was
							
							acknowledged by all, yet from their humble coffins, too, the breath of
							
							corruption had come, naturally, as from all dead bodies, but that
							
							had caused no scandal nor even the slightest excitement. Of course,
							
							there had been, in former times, saints in the monastery whose
							
							memory was carefully preserved and whose relics, according to
							
							tradition, showed no signs of corruption. This fact was regarded by
							
							the monks as touching and mysterious, and the tradition of it was
							
							cherished as something blessed and miraculous, and as a promise, by
							
							God's grace, of still greater glory from their tombs in the future.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p16">One such, whose memory was particularly cherished, was an old
							
							monk, Job, who had died seventy years before at the age of a hundred
							
							and five. He had been a celebrated ascetic, rigid in fasting and
							
							silence, and his tomb was pointed out to all visitors on their arrival
							
							with peculiar respect and mysterious hints of great hopes connected
							
							with it. (That was the very tomb on which Father Paissy had found
							
							Alyosha sitting in the morning.) Another memory cherished in the
							
							monastery was that of the famous Father Varsonofy, who was only
							
							recently dead and had preceded Father Zossima in the eldership. He was
							
							reverenced during his lifetime as a crazy saint by all the pilgrims to
							
							the monastery. There was a tradition that both of these had lain in
							
							their coffins as though alive, that they had shown no signs of
							
							decomposition when they were buried and that there had been a holy
							
							light in their faces. And some people even insisted that a sweet
							
							fragrance came from their bodies.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p17">Yet, in spite of these edifying memories, it would be difficult to
							
							explain the frivolity, absurdity and malice that were manifested
							
							beside the coffin of Father Zossima. It is my private opinion that
							
							several different causes were simultaneously at work, one of which was
							
							the deeply rooted hostility to the institution of elders as a
							
							pernicious innovation, an antipathy hidden deep in the hearts of
							
							many of the monks. Even more powerful was jealousy of the dead man's
							
							saintliness, so firmly established during lifetime that it was
							
							almost a forbidden thing to question it. For though the late elder had
							
							won over many hearts, more by love than by miracles, and had
							
							gathered round him a mass of loving adherents, none the less, in fact,
							
							rather the more on that account he had awakened jealousy and so had
							
							come to have bitter enemies, secret and open, not only in the
							
							monastery but in the world outside it. He did no one any harm, but
							
							"Why do they think him so saintly?" And that question alone, gradually
							
							repeated, gave rise at last to an intense, insatiable hatred of him.
							
							That, I believe, was why many people were extremely delighted at the
							
							smell of decomposition which came so quickly, for not a day had passed
							
							since his death. At the same time there were some among those who
							
							had been hitherto reverently devoted to the elder, who were almost
							
							mortified and personally affronted by this incident. This was how
							
							the thing happened.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p18">As soon as signs of decomposition had begun to appear, the whole
							
							aspect of the monks betrayed their secret motives in entering the
							
							cell. They went in, stayed a little while and hastened out to
							
							confirm the news to the crowd of other monks waiting outside. Some
							
							of the latter shook their heads mournfully, but others did not even
							
							care to conceal the delight which gleamed unmistakably in their
							
							malignant eyes. And now no one reproached them for it, no one raised
							
							his voice in protest, which was strange, for the majority of the monks
							
							had been devoted to the dead elder. But it seemed as though God had in
							
							this case let the minority get the upper hand for a time.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p19">Visitors from outside, particularly of the educated class, soon
							
							went into the cell, too, with the same spying intent. Of the peasantry
							
							few went into the cell, though there were crowds of them at the
							
							gates of the hermitage. After three o'clock the rush of worldly
							
							visitors was greatly increased and this was no doubt owing to the
							
							shocking news. People were attracted who would not otherwise have come
							
							on that day and had not intended to come, and among them were some
							
							personages of high standing. But external decorum was still
							
							preserved and Father Paissy, with a stern face, continued firmly and
							
							distinctly reading aloud the Gospel, apparently not noticing what
							
							was taking place around him, though he had, in fact, observed
							
							something unusual long before. But at last the murmurs, first
							
							subdued but gradually louder and more confident, reached even him. "It
							
							shows God's judgment is not as man's," Father Paissy heard suddenly.
							
							The first to give utterance to this sentiment was a layman, an elderly
							
							official from the town, known to be a man of great piety. But he
							
							only repeated aloud what the monks had long been whispering. They
							
							had long before formulated this damning conclusion, and the worst of
							
							it was that a sort of triumphant satisfaction at that conclusion
							
							became more and more apparent every moment. Soon they began to lay
							
							aside even external decorum and almost seemed to feel they had a
							
							sort of right to discard it.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p20">"And for what reason can this have happened," some of the monks
							
							said, at first with a show of regret; "he had a small frame and his
							
							flesh was dried up on his bones, what was there to decay?"
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p21">"It must be a sign from heaven," others hastened to add, and their
							
							opinion was adopted at once without protest. For it was pointed out,
							
							too, that if the decomposition had been natural, as in the case of
							
							every dead sinner, it would have been apparent later, after a lapse of
							
							at least twenty-four hours, but this premature corruption "was in
							
							excess of nature," and so the finger of God was evident. It was
							
							meant for a sign. This conclusion seemed irresistible.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p22">Gentle Father Iosif, the librarian, a great favourite of the
							
							dead man's, tried to reply to some of the evil speakers that "this
							
							is not held everywhere alike," and that the incorruptibility of the
							
							bodies of the just was not a dogma of the Orthodox Church, but only an
							
							opinion, and that even in the most Orthodox regions, at Athos for
							
							instance, they were not greatly confounded by the smell of corruption,
							
							and there the chief sign of the glorification of the saved was not
							
							bodily incorruptibility, but the colour of the bones when the bodies
							
							have lain many years in the earth and have decayed in it. "And if
							
							the bones are yellow as wax, that is the great sign that the Lord
							
							has glorified the dead saint, if they are not yellow but black, it
							
							shows that God has not deemed him worthy of such glory- that is the
							
							belief in Athos, a great place, which the Orthodox doctrine has been
							
							preserved from of old, unbroken and in its greatest purity," said
							
							Father Iosif in conclusion.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p23">But the meek Father's words had little effect and even provoked
							
							a mocking retort. "That's all pedantry and innovation, no use
							
							listening to it," the monks decided. "We stick to the old doctrine;
							
							there are all sorts of innovations nowadays, are we to follow them
							
							all?" added others.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p24">"We have had as many holy fathers as they had. There they are
							
							among the Turks, they have forgotten everything. Their doctrine has
							
							long been impure and they have no bells even, the most sneering added.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p25">Father Iosif walked away, grieving the more since he had put
							
							forward his own opinion with little confidence as though scarcely
							
							believing in it himself. He foresaw with distress that something
							
							very unseemly was beginning and that there were positive signs of
							
							disobedience. Little by little, all the sensible monks were reduced to
							
							silence like Father Iosif. And so it came to pass that all who loved
							
							the elder and had accepted with devout obedience the institution of
							
							the eldership were all at once terribly cast down and glanced
							
							timidly in one another's faces, when they met. Those who were
							
							hostile to the institution of elders, as a novelty, held up their
							
							heads proudly. "There was no smell of corruption from the late elder
							
							Varsonofy, but a sweet fragrance," they recalled malignantly. "But
							
							he gained that glory not because he was an elder, but because he was a
							
							holy man."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p26">And this was followed by a shower of criticism and even blame of
							
							Father Zossima. "His teaching was false; he taught that life is a
							
							great joy and not a vale of tears," said some of the more
							
							unreasonable. "He followed the fashionable belief, he did not
							
							recognise material fire in hell," others, still more unreasonable,
							
							added. "He was not strict in fasting, allowed himself sweet things,
							
							ate cherry jam with his tea, ladies used to send it to him. Is it
							
							for a monk of strict rule to drink tea?" could be heard among some
							
							of the envious. "He sat in pride," the most malignant declared
							
							vindictively; "he considered himself a saint and he took it as his due
							
							when people knelt before him." "He abused the sacrament of
							
							confession," the fiercest opponents of the institution of elders added
							
							in a malicious whisper. And among these were some of the oldest monks,
							
							strictest in their devotion, genuine ascetics, who had kept silent
							
							during the life of the deceased elder, but now suddenly unsealed their
							
							lips. And this was terrible, for their words had great influence on
							
							young monks who were not yet firm in their convictions. The monk
							
							from Obdorsk heard all this attentively, heaving deep sighs and
							
							nodding his head. "Yes, clearly Father Ferapont was right in his
							
							judgment yesterday," and at that moment Father Ferapont himself made
							
							his appearance, as though on purpose to increase the confusion.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p27">I have mentioned already that he rarely left his wooden cell by
							
							the apiary. He was seldom even seen at church and they overlooked this
							
							neglect on the ground of his craziness, and did not keep him to the
							
							rules binding on all the rest. But if the whole truth is to be told,
							
							they hardly had a choice about it. For it would have been
							
							discreditable to insist on burdening with the common regulations so
							
							great an ascetic, who prayed day and night (he even dropped asleep
							
							on his knees). If they had insisted, the monks would have said, "He is
							
							holier than all of us and he follows a rule harder than ours. And if
							
							he does not go to church, it's because he knows when he ought to; he
							
							has his own rule." It was to avoid the chance of these sinful
							
							murmurs that Father Ferapont was left in peace.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p28">As everyone was aware, Father Ferapont particularly disliked
							
							Father Zossima. And now the news had reached him in his hut that
							
							"God's judgment is not the same as man's," and that something had
							
							happened which was "in excess of nature." It may well be supposed that
							
							among the first to run to him with the news was the monk from Obdorsk,
							
							who had visited him the evening before and left his cell
							
							terror-stricken.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p29">I have mentioned above, that though Father Paissy standing firm
							
							and immovable reading the Gospel over the coffin, could not hear nor
							
							see what was passing outside the cell, he gauged most of it
							
							correctly in his heart, for he knew the men surrounding him well. He
							
							was not shaken by it, but awaited what would come next without fear,
							
							watching with penetration and insight for the outcome of the general
							
							excitement.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p30">Suddenly an extraordinary uproar in the passage in open defiance
							
							of decorum burst on his ears. The door was flung open and Father
							
							Ferapont appeared in the doorway. Behind him there could be seen
							
							accompanying him a crowd of monks, together with many people from
							
							the town. They did not, however, enter the cell, but stood at the
							
							bottom of the steps, waiting to see what Father Ferapont would say
							
							or do. For they felt with a certain awe, in spite of their audacity,
							
							that he had not come for nothing. Standing in the doorway, Father
							
							Ferapont raised his arms, and under his right arm the keen inquisitive
							
							little eyes of the monk from Obdorsk peeped in. He alone, in his
							
							intense curiosity, could not resist running up the steps after
							
							Father Ferapont. The others, on the contrary, pressed farther back
							
							in sudden alarm when the door was noisily flung open. Holding his
							
							hands aloft, Father Ferapont suddenly roared:
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p31">"Casting out I cast out!" and, turning in all directions, he began
							
							at once making the sign of the cross at each of the four walls and
							
							four corners of the cell in succession. All who accompanied Father
							
							Ferapont immediately understood his action. For they knew he always
							
							did this wherever he went, and that he would not sit down or say a
							
							word, till he had driven out the evil spirits.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p32">"Satan, go hence! Satan, go hence!" he repeated at each sign of
							
							the cross. "Casting out I cast out," he roared again.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p33">He was wearing his coarse gown girt with a rope. His bare chest,
							
							covered with grey hair, could be seen under his hempen shirt. His feet
							
							were bare. As soon as he began waving his arms, the cruel irons he
							
							wore under his gown could be heard clanking.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p34">Father Paissy paused in his reading, stepped forward and stood
							
							before him waiting
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p35">"What have you come for, worthy Father? Why do you offend
							
							against good order? Why do you disturb the peace of the flock?" he
							
							said at last, looking sternly at him.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p36">"What have I come for? You ask why? What is your faith?" shouted
							
							Father Ferapont crazily. "I've come here to drive out your visitors,
							
							the unclean devils. I've come to see how many have gathered here while
							
							I have been away. I want to sweep them out with a birch broom."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p37">"You cast out the evil spirit, but perhaps you are serving him
							
							yourself," Father Paissy went on fearlessly. "And who can say of
							
							himself 'I am holy'? Can you, Father?"
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p38">"I am unclean, not holy. I would not sit in an arm-chair and would
							
							not have them bow down to me as an idol," thundered Father Ferapont.
							
							"Nowadays folk destroy the true faith. The dead man, your saint," he
							
							turned to the crowd, pointing with his finger to the coffin, "did
							
							not believe in devils. He gave medicine to keep off the devils. And so
							
							they have become as common as spiders in the corners. And now he has
							
							begun to stink himself. In that we see a great sign from God."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p39">The incident he referred to was this. One of the monks was haunted
							
							in his dreams and, later on, in waking moments, by visions of evil
							
							spirits. When in the utmost terror he confided this to Father Zossima,
							
							the elder had advised continual prayer and rigid fasting. But when
							
							that was of no use, he advised him while persisting in prayer and
							
							fasting, to take a special medicine. Many persons were shocked at
							
							the time and wagged their heads as they talked over it- and most of
							
							all Father Ferapont, to whom some of the censorious had hastened to
							
							report this "extraordinary" counsel on the part of the elder.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p40">"Go away, Father!" said Father Paissy, in a commanding voice,
							
							"it's not for man to judge but for God. Perhaps we see here a 'sign'
							
							which neither you, nor I, nor anyone of us is able to comprehend.
							
							Go, Father, and do not trouble the flock!" he repeated impressively.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p41">"He did not keep the fasts according to the rule and therefore the
							
							sign has come. That is clear and it's a sin to hide it," the
							
							fanatic, carried away by a zeal that outstripped his reason, would not
							
							be quieted. "He was seduced by sweetmeats, ladies brought them to
							
							him in their pockets, he sipped tea, he worshipped his belly,
							
							filling it with sweet things and his mind with haughty thoughts....
							
							And for this he is put to shame...."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p42">"You speak lightly, Father." Father Paissy, too, raised his voice.
							
							"I admire your fasting and severities, but you speak lightly like some
							
							frivolous youth, fickle and childish. Go away, Father, I command you!"
							
							Father Paissy thundered in conclusion.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p43">"I will go," said Ferapont, seeming somewhat taken aback, but
							
							still as bitter. "You learned men! You are so clever you look down
							
							upon my humbleness. I came hither with little learning and here I have
							
							forgotten what I did know; God Himself has preserved me in my weakness
							
							from your subtlety."
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p44">Father Paissy stood over him, waiting resolutely. Father
							
							Ferapont paused and, suddenly leaning his cheek on his hand
							
							despondently, pronounced in a sing-song, voice, looking at the
							
							coffin of the dead elder:
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p45">"To-morrow they will sing over him 'Our Helper and Defender'- a
							
							splendid anthem- and over me when I die all they'll sing will be 'What
							
							Earthly Joy'- a little cantical,"* he added with tearful regret.
							
							"You are proud and puffed up, this is a vain place!" he shouted
							
							suddenly like a madman, and with a wave of his hand he turned
							
							quickly and quickly descended the steps. The crowd awaiting him
							
							below wavered; some followed him at once and some lingered, for the
							
							cell was still open, and Father Paissy, following Father Ferapont on
							
							to the steps, stood watching him. the excited old fanatic was not
							
							completely silenced. Walking twenty steps away, he suddenly turned
							
							towards the setting sun, raised both his arms and, as though someone
							
							had cut him down, fell to the ground with a loud scream.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p46">* When a monk's body is carried out from the cell to the church
							
							and from the church to the graveyard, the canticle "What Earthly
							
							Joy..." is sung. If the deceased was a priest as well as a monk the
							
							canticle "Our Helper and Defender" is sung instead.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p47">"My God has conquered! Christ has conquered the setting sun!" he
							
							shouted frantically, stretching up his hands to the sun, and falling
							
							face downwards on the ground, he sobbed like a little child, shaken by
							
							his tears and spreading out his arms on the ground. Then all rushed up
							
							to him; there were exclamations and sympathetic sobs... a kind of
							
							frenzy seemed to take possession of them all.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p48">"This is the one who is a saint! This is the one who is a holy
							
							man!" some cried aloud, losing their fear. "This is he who should be
							
							an elder," others added malignantly.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p49">"He wouldn't be an elder... he would refuse... he wouldn't serve a
							
							cursed innovation... he wouldn't imitate their foolery," other
							
							voices chimed in at once. And it is hard to say how far they might
							
							have gone, but at that moment the bell rang summoning them to service.
							
							All began crossing themselves at once. Father Ferapont, too, got up
							
							and crossing himself went back to his cell without looking round,
							
							still uttering exclamations which were utterly incoherent. A few
							
							followed him, but the greater number dispersed, hastening to
							
							service. Father Paissy let Father Iosif read in his place and went
							
							down. The frantic outcries of bigots could not shake him, but his
							
							heart was suddenly filled with melancholy for some special reason
							
							and he felt that. He stood still and suddenly wondered, "Why am I
							
							sad even to dejection?" and immediately grasped with surprise that his
							
							sudden sadness was due to a very small and special cause. In the crowd
							
							thronging at the entrance to the cell, he had noticed Alyosha and he
							
							remembered that he had felt at once a pang at heart on seeing him.
							
							"Can that boy mean so much to my heart now?" he asked himself,
							
							wondering.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p50">At that moment Alyosha passed him, hurrying away, but not in the
							
							direction of the church. Their eyes met. Alyosha quickly turned away
							
							his eyes and dropped them to the ground, and from the boy's look
							
							alone, Father Paissy guessed what a great change was taking place in
							
							him at that moment.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p51">"Have you, too, fallen into temptation?" cried Father Paissy. "Can
							
							you be with those of little faith?" he added mournfully.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p52">Alyosha stood still and gazed vaguely at Father Paissy, but
							
							quickly turned his eyes away again and again looked on the ground.
							
							He stood sideways and did not turn his face to Father Paissy, who
							
							watched him attentively.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p53">"Where are you hastening? The bell calls to service," he asked
							
							again, but again Alyosha gave no answer.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p54">"Are you leaving the hermitage? What, without asking leave,
							
							without asking a blessing?"
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p55">Alyosha suddenly gave a wry smile, cast a strange, very strange,
							
							look at the Father to whom his former guide, the former sovereign of
							
							his heart and mind, his beloved elder, had confided him as he lay
							
							dying. And suddenly, still without speaking, waved his hand, as though
							
							not caring even to be respectful, and with rapid steps walked
							
							towards the gates away from the hermitage.
							
								</p><p id="i_11-p56">"You will come back again!" murmured Father Paissy, looking
							
							after him with sorrowful surprise.</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - A Critical Moment" prev="i_11" next="iii_9" id="ii_9">
					
							<p id="ii_9-p1">FATHER PAISSY, of course, was not wrong when he decided that his
							
							"dear boy" would come back again. Perhaps indeed, to some extent, he
							
							penetrated with insight into the true meaning of Alyosha's spiritual
							
							condition. Yet I must frankly own that it would be very difficult
							
							for me to give a clear account of that strange, vague moment in the
							
							life of the young hero I love so much. To Father Paissy's sorrowful
							
							question, "Are you too with those of little faith?" I could, of
							
							course, confidently answer for Alyosha, "No, he is not with those of
							
							little faith. Quite the contrary." Indeed, all his trouble came from
							
							the fact that he was of great faith. But still the trouble was there
							
							and was so agonising that even long afterwards Alyosha thought of that
							
							sorrowful day as one of the bitterest and most fatal days of his life.
							
							If the question is asked: "Could all his grief and disturbance have
							
							been only due to the fact that his elder's body had shown signs of
							
							premature decomposition instead of at once performing miracles?" I
							
							must answer without beating about the bush, "Yes, it certainly was." I
							
							would only beg the reader not to be in too great a hurry to laugh at
							
							my young hero's pure heart. I am far from intending to apologise for
							
							him or to justify his innocent faith on the ground of his youth, or
							
							the little progress he had made in his studies, or any such reason.
							
							I must declare, on the contrary, that I have genuine respect for the
							
							qualities of his heart. No doubt a youth who received impressions
							
							cautiously, whose love was lukewarm, and whose mind was too prudent
							
							for his age and so of little value, such a young man might, I admit,
							
							have avoided what happened to my hero. But in some cases it is
							
							really more creditable to be carried away by an emotion, however
							
							unreasonable, which springs from a great love, than to be unmoved. And
							
							this is even truer in youth, for a young man who is always sensible is
							
							to be suspected and is of little worth- that's my opinion!
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p2">"But," reasonable people will exclaim perhaps, "every young man
							
							cannot believe in such a superstition and your hero is no model for
							
							others."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p3">To this I reply again, "Yes! my hero had faith, a faith holy and
							
							steadfast, but still I am not going to apologise for him."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p4">Though I declared above, and perhaps too hastily, that I should
							
							not explain or justify my hero, I see that some explanation is
							
							necessary for the understanding of the rest of my story. Let me say
							
							then, it was not a question of miracles. There was no frivolous and
							
							impatient expectation of miracles in his mind. And Alyosha needed no
							
							miracles at the time, for the triumph of some preconceived idea- oh
							
							no, not at all- what he saw before all was one figure- the figure of
							
							his beloved elder, the figure of that holy man whom he revered with
							
							such adoration. The fact is that all the love that lay concealed in
							
							his pure young heart for everyone and everything had, for the past
							
							year, been concentrated- and perhaps wrongly so- on one being, his
							
							beloved elder. It is true that being had for so long been accepted
							
							by him as his ideal, that all his young strength and energy could
							
							not but turn towards that ideal, even to the forgetting at the
							
							moment "of everyone and everything." He remembered afterwards how,
							
							on that terrible day, he had entirely forgotten his brother Dmitri,
							
							about whom he had been so anxious and troubled the day before; he
							
							had forgotten, too, to take the two hundred roubles to Ilusha's
							
							father, though he had so warmly intended to do so the preceding
							
							evening. But again it was not miracles he needed but only "the
							
							higher justice" which had been in his belief outraged by the blow that
							
							had so suddenly and cruelly wounded his heart. And what does it
							
							signify that this "justice" looked for by Alyosha inevitably took
							
							the shape of miracles to be wrought immediately by the ashes of his
							
							adored teacher? Why, everyone in the monastery cherished the same
							
							thought and the same hope, even those whose intellects Alyosha
							
							revered, Father Paissy himself, for instance. And so Alyosha,
							
							untroubled by doubts, clothed his dreams too in the same form as all
							
							the rest. And a whole year of life in the monastery had formed the
							
							habit of this expectation in his heart. But it was justice, justice,
							
							he thirsted for, not simply miracles.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p5">And now the man who should, he believed, have been exalted above
							
							everyone in the whole world, that man, instead of receiving the
							
							glory that was his due, was suddenly degraded and dishonoured! What
							
							for? Who had judged him? Who could have decreed this? Those were the
							
							questions that wrung his inexperienced and virginal heart. He could
							
							not endure without mortification, without resentment even, that the
							
							holiest of holy men should have been exposed to the jeering and
							
							spiteful mockery of the frivolous crowd so inferior to him. Even had
							
							there been no miracles, had there been nothing marvellous to justify
							
							his hopes, why this indignity, why this humiliation, why this
							
							premature decay, "in excess of nature," as the spiteful monks said?
							
							Why this "sign from heaven," which they so triumphantly acclaimed in
							
							company with Father Ferapont, and why did they believe they had gained
							
							the right to acclaim it? Where is the finger of Providence? Why did
							
							Providence hide its face "at the most critical moment" (so Alyosha
							
							thought it), as though voluntarily submitting to the blind, dumb,
							
							pitiless laws of nature?
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p6">That was why Alyosha's heart was bleeding, and, of course, as I
							
							have said already, the sting of it all was that the man he loved above
							
							everything on earth should be put to shame and humiliated! This
							
							murmuring may have been shallow and unreasonable in my hero, but I
							
							repeat again for the third time- and am prepared to admit that it
							
							might be difficult to defend my feeling- I am glad that my hero showed
							
							himself not too reasonable at that moment, for any man of sense will
							
							always come back to reason in time, but, if love does not gain the
							
							upper hand in a boy's heart at such an exceptional moment, when will
							
							it? I will not, however, omit to mention something strange, which came
							
							for a time to the surface of Alyosha's mind at this fatal and
							
							obscure moment. This new something was the harassing impression left
							
							by the conversation with Ivan, which now persistently haunted
							
							Alyosha's mind. At this moment it haunted him. Oh, it was not that
							
							something of the fundamental, elemental, so to speak, faith of his
							
							soul had been shaken. He loved his God and believed in Him
							
							steadfastly, though he was suddenly murmuring against Him. Yet a vague
							
							but tormenting and evil impression left by his conversation with
							
							Ivan the day before, suddenly revived again now in his soul and seemed
							
							forcing its way to the surface of his consciousness.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p7">It had begun to get dusk when Rakitin, crossing the pine copse
							
							from the hermitage to the monastery, suddenly noticed Alyosha, lying
							
							face downwards on the ground under a tree, not moving and apparently
							
							asleep. He went up and called him by his name.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p8">"You here, Alexey? Can you have- " he began wondering but broke
							
							off. He had meant to say, "Can you have come to this?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p9">Alyosha did not look at him, but from a slight movement Rakitin at
							
							once saw that he heard and understood him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p10">"What's the matter?" he went on; but the surprise in his face
							
							gradually passed into a smile that became more and more ironical.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p11">"I say, I've been looking for you for the last two hours. You
							
							suddenly disappeared. What are you about? What foolery is this? You
							
							might just look at me..."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p12">Alyosha raised his head, sat up and leaned his back against the
							
							tree. He was not crying, but there was a look of suffering and
							
							irritability in his face. He did not look at Rakitin, however, but
							
							looked away to one side of him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p13">"Do you know your face is quite changed? There's none of your
							
							famous mildness to be seen in it. Are you angry with someone? Have
							
							they been ill-treating you?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p14">"Let me alone," said Alyosha suddenly, with a weary gesture of his
							
							hand, still looking away from him.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p15">"Oho! So that's how we are feeling! So you can shout at people
							
							like other mortals. That is a come-down from the angels. I say,
							
							Alyosha, you have surprised me, do you hear? I mean it. It's long
							
							since I've been surprised at anything here. I always took you for an
							
							educated man.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p16">Alyosha at last looked at him, but vaguely, as though scarcely
							
							understanding what he said.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p17">"Can you really be so upset simply because your old man has
							
							begun to stink? You don't mean to say you seriously believed that he
							
							was going to work miracles?" exclaimed Rakitin, genuinely surprised
							
							again.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p18">"I believed, I believe, I want to believe, and I will believe,
							
							what more do you want?" cried Alyosha irritably.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p19">"Nothing at all, my boy. Damn it all! why, no schoolboy of
							
							thirteen believes in that now. But there... So now you are in a temper
							
							with your God, you are rebelling against Him; He hasn't given
							
							promotion, He hasn't bestowed the order of merit! Eh, you are a set!"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p20">Alyosha gazed a long while with his eyes half closed at Rakitin,
							
							and there was a sudden gleam in his eyes... but not of anger with
							
							Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p21">"I am not rebelling against my God; I simply 'don't accept His
							
							world.'" Alyosha suddenly smiled a forced smile.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p22">"How do you mean, you don't accept the world?" Rakitin thought a
							
							moment over his answer. "What idiocy is this?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p23">Alyosha did not answer.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p24">"Come, enough nonsense, now to business. Have you had anything
							
							to eat to-day?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p25">"I don't remember.... I think I have."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p26">"You need keeping up, to judge by your face. It makes one sorry to
							
							look at you. You didn't sleep all night either, I hear; you had a
							
							meeting in there. And then all this bobbery afterwards. Most likely
							
							you've had nothing to eat but a mouthful of holy bread. I've got
							
							some sausage in my pocket; I've brought it from the town in case of
							
							need, only you won't eat sausage...."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p27">"Give me some."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p28">"I say! You are going it! Why, it's a regular mutiny, with
							
							barricades! Well, my boy, we must make the most of it. Come to my
							
							place... shouldn't mind a drop of vodka myself, I am tired to death.
							
							Vodka is going too far for you, I suppose... or would you like some?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p29">"Give me some vodka too."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p30">"Hullo! You surprise me, brother!" Rakitin looked at him in
							
							amazement. "Well, one way or another, vodka or sausage, this is a
							
							jolly fine chance and mustn't be missed. Come along."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p31">Alyosha got up in silence and followed Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p32">"If your little brother Ivan could see this wouldn't he be
							
							surprised! By the way, your brother Ivan set off to Moscow this
							
							morning, did you know?"
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p33">"Yes," answered Alyosha listlessly, and suddenly the image of
							
							his brother Dmitri rose before his mind. But only for a minute, and
							
							though it reminded him of something that must not be put off for a
							
							moment, some duty, some terrible obligation, even that reminder made
							
							no impression on him, did not reach his heart and instantly faded
							
							out of his mind and was forgotten. But, a long while afterwards,
							
							Alyosha remembered this.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p34">"Your brother Ivan declared once that I was a 'liberal booby
							
							with no talents whatsoever.' Once you, too, could not resist letting
							
							me know I was 'dishonourable.' Well! I should like to see what your
							
							talents and sense of honour will do for you now." This phrase
							
							Rakitin finished to himself in a whisper.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p35">"Listen!" he said aloud, "Let's go by the path beyond the
							
							monastery straight to the town. H'm! I ought to go to Madame
							
							Hohlakov's by the way. Only fancy, I've written to tell her everything
							
							that happened, and would you believe it, she answered me instantly
							
							in pencil (the lady has a passion for writing notes) that 'she would
							
							never have expected such conduct from a man of such a reverend
							
							character as Father Zossima.' That was her very word: 'conduct.' She
							
							is angry too. Eh, you are a set! Stay!" he cried suddenly again. He
							
							suddenly stopped and taking Alyosha by the shoulder made him stop too.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p36">"Do you know, Alyosha," he peeped inquisitively into his eyes,
							
							absorbed in a sudden new thought which had dawned on him, and though
							
							he was laughing outwardly he was evidently afraid to utter that new
							
							idea aloud, so difficult he still found it to believe in the strange
							
							and unexpected mood in which he now saw Alyosha. "Alyosha, do you know
							
							where we had better go?" he brought out at last timidly, and
							
							insinuatingly.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p37">"I don't care... where you like."
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p38">"Let's go to Grushenka, eh? Will you come?" pronounced Rakitin
							
							at last, trembling with timid suspense.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p39">"Let's go to Grushenka," Alyosha answered calmly, at once, and
							
							this prompt and calm agreement was such a surprise to Rakitin that
							
							he almost started back.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p40">"Well! I say!" he cried in amazement, but seizing Alyosha firmly
							
							by the arm be led him along the path, still dreading that he would
							
							change his mind.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p41">They walked along in silence; Rakitin was positively afraid to
							
							talk.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p42">"And how glad she will be, how delighted!" he muttered, but lapsed
							
							into silence again. And indeed it was not to please Grushenka he was
							
							taking Alyosha to her. He was a practical person and never undertook
							
							anything without a prospect of gain for himself. His object in this
							
							case was twofold, first a revengeful desire to see "the downfall of
							
							the righteous," and Alyosha's fall "from the saints to the sinners,"
							
							over which he was already gloating in his imagination, and in the
							
							second place he had in view a certain material gain for himself, of
							
							which more will be said later.
							
								</p><p id="ii_9-p43">"So the critical moment has come," he thought to himself with
							
							spiteful glee, "and we shall catch it on the hop, for it's just what
							
							we want."</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - An Onion" prev="ii_9" next="iv_5" id="iii_9">
					
					
							<p id="iii_9-p1">GRUSHENKA lived in the busiest part of the town, near the
							
							cathedral square, in a small wooden lodge in the courtyard belonging
							
							to the house of the widow Morozov. The house was a large stone
							
							building of two stories, old and very ugly. The widow led a secluded
							
							life with her two unmarried nieces, who were also elderly women. She
							
							had no need to let her lodge, but everyone knew that she had taken
							
							in Grushenka as a lodger, four years before, solely to please her
							
							kinsman, the merchant Samsonov, who was known to the girl's protector.
							
							It was said that the jealous old man's object in placing his
							
							"favourite" with the widow Morozov was that the old woman should
							
							keep a sharp eye on her new lodger's conduct. But this sharp eye
							
							soon proved to be unnecessary, and in the end the widow Morozov seldom
							
							met Grushenka and did not worry her by looking after her in any way.
							
							It is true that four years had passed since the old man had brought
							
							the slim, delicate, shy, timid, dreamy, and sad girl of eighteen
							
							from the chief town of the province, and much had happened since then.
							
							Little was known of the girl's history in the town and that little was
							
							vague. Nothing more had been learnt during the last four years, even
							
							after many persons had become interested in the beautiful young
							
							woman into whom Agrafena Alexandrovna had meanwhile developed. There
							
							were rumours that she had been at seventeen betrayed by someone,
							
							some sort of officer, and immediately afterwards abandoned by him. The
							
							officer had gone away and afterwards married, while Grushenka had been
							
							left in poverty and disgrace. It was said, however, that though
							
							Grushenka had been raised from destitution by the old man, Samsonov,
							
							she came of a respectable family belonging to the clerical class, that
							
							she was the daughter of a deacon or something of the sort.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p2">And now after four years the sensitive, injured and pathetic
							
							little orphan had become a plump, rosy beauty of the Russian type, a
							
							woman of bold and determined character, proud and insolent. She had
							
							a good head for business, was acquisitive, saving and careful, and
							
							by fair means or foul had succeeded, it was said, in amassing a little
							
							fortune. There was only, one point on which all were agreed. Grushenka
							
							was not easily to be approached and, except her aged protector,
							
							there had not been one man who could boast of her favours during those
							
							four years. It was a positive fact, for there had been a good many,
							
							especially during the last two years, who had attempted to obtain
							
							those favours. But all their efforts had been in vain and some of
							
							these suitors had been forced to beat an undignified and even comic
							
							retreat, owing to the firm and ironical resistance they met from the
							
							strong-willed young person. It was known, too, that the young person
							
							had, especially of late, been given to what is called "speculation,"
							
							and that she had shown marked abilities in that direction, so that
							
							many people began to say that she was no better than a Jew. It was not
							
							that she lent money on interest, but it was known, for instance,
							
							that she had for some time past, in partnership with old Karamazov,
							
							actually invested in the purchase of bad debts for a trifle, a tenth
							
							of their nominal value, and afterwards had made out of them ten
							
							times their value.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p3">The old widower Samsonov, a man of large fortune, was stingy and
							
							merciless. He tyrannised over his grown-up sons, but, for the last
							
							year during which he had been ill and lost the use of his swollen
							
							legs, he had fallen greatly under the influence of his protegee,
							
							whom he had at first kept strictly and in humble surroundings, "on
							
							Lenten fare," as the wits said at the time. But Grushenka had
							
							succeeded in emancipating herself, while she established in him a
							
							boundless belief in her fidelity. The old man, now long since dead,
							
							had had a large business in his day and was also a noteworthy
							
							character, miserly and hard as flint. Though Grushenka's hold upon him
							
							was so strong that he could not live without her (it had been so
							
							especially for the last two years), he did not settle any considerable
							
							fortune on her and would not have been moved to do so, if she had
							
							threatened to leave him. But he had presented her with a small sum,
							
							and even that was a surprise to everyone when it became known.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p4">"You are a wench with brains," he said to her, when he gave her
							
							eight thousand roubles, "and you must look after yourself, but let
							
							me tell you that except your yearly allowance as before, you'll get
							
							nothing more from me to the day of my death, and I'll leave you
							
							nothing in my will either."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p5">And he kept his word; he died and left everything to his sons,
							
							whom, with their wives and children, he had treated all his life as
							
							servants. Grushenka was not even mentioned in his will. All this
							
							became known afterwards. He helped Grushenka with his advice to
							
							increase her capital and put business in her way.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p6">When Fyodor Pavlovitch, who first came into contact with Grushenka
							
							over a piece of speculation, ended to his own surprise by falling
							
							madly in love with her, old Samsonov, gravely ill as he was, was
							
							immensely amused. It is remarkable that throughout their whole
							
							acquaintance Grushenka was absolutely and spontaneously open with
							
							the old man, and he seems to have been the only person in the world
							
							with whom she was so. Of late, when Dmitri too had come on the scene
							
							with his love, the old man left off laughing. On the contrary, he once
							
							gave Grushenka a stern and earnest piece of advice.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p7">"If you have to choose between the two, father or son, you'd
							
							better choose the old man, if only you make sure the old scoundrel
							
							will marry you and settle some fortune on you beforehand. But don't
							
							keep on with the captain, you'll get no good out of that."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p8">These were the very words of the old profligate, who felt
							
							already that his death was not far off and who actually died five
							
							months later.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p9">I will note too, in passing- that although many in our town knew
							
							of the grotesque and monstrous rivalry of the Karamazovs, father and
							
							son, the object of which was Grushenka, scarcely anyone understood
							
							what really underlay her attitude to both of them. Even Grushenka's
							
							two servants (after the catastrophe of which we will speak later)
							
							testified in court that she received Dmitri Fyodorovitch simply from
							
							fear because "he threatened to murder her." These servants were an old
							
							cook, invalidish and almost deaf, who came from Grushenka's old
							
							home, and her granddaughter, a smart young girl of twenty, who
							
							performed the duties of a maid. Grushenka lived very economically
							
							and her surroundings were anything but luxurious. Her lodge
							
							consisted of three rooms furnished with mahogany furniture in the
							
							fashion of 1820, belonging to her landlady.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p10">It was quite dark when Rakitin and Alyosha entered her rooms,
							
							yet they were not lighted up. Grushenka was lying down in her
							
							drawing-room on the big, hard, clumsy sofa, with a mahogany back.
							
							The sofa was covered with shabby and ragged leather. Under her head
							
							she had two white down pillows taken from her bed. She was lying
							
							stretched out motionless on her back with her hands behind her head.
							
							She was dressed as though expecting someone, in a black silk dress,
							
							with a dainty lace fichu on her head, which was very becoming. Over
							
							her shoulders was thrown a lace shawl pinned with a massive gold
							
							brooch. She certainly was expecting someone. She lay as though
							
							impatient and weary, her face rather pale and her lips and eyes hot,
							
							restlessly tapping the arm of the sofa with the tip of her right foot.
							
							The appearance of Rakitin and Alyosha caused a slight excitement. From
							
							the hall they could hear Grushenka leap up from the sofa and cry out
							
							in a frightened voice, "Who's there?" But the maid met the visitors
							
							and at once called back to her mistress.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p11">"It's not he, it's nothing, only other visitors."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p12">"What can be the matter?" muttered Rakitin, leading Alyosha into
							
							the drawing-room.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p13">Grushenka was standing by the sofa as though still alarmed. A
							
							thick coil of her dark brown hair escaped from its lace covering and
							
							fell on her right shoulder, but she did not notice it and did not
							
							put it back till she had gazed at her visitors and recognised them.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p14">"Ah, it's you, Rakitin? You quite frightened me. Whom have you
							
							brought? Who is this with you? Good heavens, you have brought him!"
							
							she exclaimed, recognising Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p15">"Do send for candles!" said Rakitin, with the free-and-easy air of
							
							a most intimate friend, who is privileged to give orders in the house.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p16">"Candles... of course, candles.... Fenya, fetch him a candle....
							
							Well, you have chosen a moment to bring him! she exclaimed again,
							
							nodding towards Alyosha, and turning to the looking-glass she began
							
							quickly fastening up her hair with both hands. She seemed displeased.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p17">"Haven't I managed to please you?" asked Rakitin, instantly almost
							
							offended.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p18">You frightened me, Rakitin, that's what it is." Grushenka turned
							
							with a smile to Alyosha. "Don't be afraid of me, my dear Alyosha,
							
							you cannot think how glad I am to see you, my unexpected visitor.
							
							But you frightened me, Rakitin, I thought it was Mitya breaking in.
							
							You see, I deceived him just now, I made him promise to believe me and
							
							I told him a lie. I told him that I was going to spend the evening
							
							with my old man, Kuzma Kuzmitch, and should be there till late
							
							counting up his money. I always spend one whole evening a week with
							
							him making up his accounts. We lock ourselves in and he counts on
							
							the reckoning beads while I sit and put things down in the book. I
							
							am the only person he trusts. Mitya believes that I am there, but I
							
							came back and have been sitting locked in here, expecting some news.
							
							How was it Fenya let you in? Fenya, Fenya, run out to the gate, open
							
							it and look about whether the captain is to be seen! Perhaps he is
							
							hiding and spying, I am dreadfully frightened."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p19">There's no one there, Agrafena Alexandrovna, I've just looked out;
							
							I keep running to peep through the crack; I am in fear and trembling
							
							myself."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p20">"Are the shutters fastened, Fenya? And we must draw the
							
							curtains- that's better!" She drew the heavy curtains herself. "He'd
							
							rush in at once if he saw a light. I am afraid of your brother Mitya
							
							to-day, Alyosha."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p21">Grushenka spoke aloud, and, though she was alarmed, she seemed
							
							very happy about something.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p22">"Why are you so afraid of Mitya to-day?" inquired Rakitin. "I
							
							should have thought you were not timid with him, you'd twist him round
							
							your little finger."
							
								"</p><p id="iii_9-p23">I tell you, I am expecting news, priceless news, so I don't
							
							want Mitya at all. And he didn't believe, I feel he didn't, that I
							
							should stay at Kuzma Kuzmitch's. He must be in his ambush now,
							
							behind Fyodor Pavlovitch's, in the garden, watching for me. And if
							
							he's there, he won't come here, so much the better! But I really
							
							have been to Kuzma Kuzmitch's, Mitya escorted me there. I told him I
							
							should stay there till midnight, and I asked him to be sure to come at
							
							midnight to fetch me home. He went away and I sat ten minutes with
							
							Kuzma Kuzmitch and came back here again. Ugh, I was afraid, I ran
							
							for fear of meeting him."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p24">"And why are you so dressed up? What a curious cap you've got on!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p25">"How curious you are yourself, Rakitin! I tell you, I am expecting
							
							a message. If the message comes, I shall fly, I shall gallop away
							
							and you will see no more of me. That's why I am dressed up, so as to
							
							be ready."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p26">"And where are you flying to?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p27">"If you know too much, you'll get old too soon."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p28">"Upon my word! You are highly delighted... I've never seen you
							
							like this before. You are dressed up as if you were going to a
							
							ball." Rakitin looked her up and down.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p29">"Much you know about balls."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p30">"And do you know much about them?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p31">"I have seen a ball. The year before last, Kuzma Kuzmitch's son
							
							was married and I looked on from the gallery. Do you suppose I want to
							
							be talking to you, Rakitin, while a prince like this is standing here.
							
							Such a visitor! Alyosha, my dear boy, I gaze at you and can't
							
							believe my eyes. Good heavens, can you have come here to see me! To
							
							tell you the truth, I never had a thought of seeing you and I didn't
							
							think that you would ever come and see me. Though this is not the
							
							moment now, I am awfully glad to see you. Sit down on the sofa,
							
							here, that's right, my bright young moon. I really can't take it in
							
							even now.... Eh, Rakitin, if only you had brought him yesterday or the
							
							day before! But I am glad as it is! Perhaps it's better he has come
							
							now, at such a moment, and not the day before yesterday."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p32">She gaily sat down beside Alyosha on the sofa, looking at him with
							
							positive delight. And she really was glad, she was not lying when
							
							she said so. Her eyes glowed, her lips laughed, but it was a
							
							good-hearted merry laugh. Alyosha had not expected to see such a
							
							kind expression in her face.... He had hardly met her till the day
							
							before, he had formed an alarming idea of her, and had been horribly
							
							distressed the day before by the spiteful and treacherous trick she
							
							had played on Katerina Ivanovna. He was greatly surprised to find
							
							her now altogether different from what he had expected. And, crushed
							
							as he was by his own sorrow, his eyes involuntarily rested on her with
							
							attention. Her whole manner seemed changed for the better since
							
							yesterday, there was scarcely any trace of that mawkish sweetness in
							
							her speech, of that voluptuous softness in her movements. Everything
							
							was simple and good-natured, her gestures were rapid, direct,
							
							confiding, but she was greatly excited.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p33">"Dear me, how everything comes together to-day!" she chattered
							
							on again. "And why I am so glad to see you, Alyosha, I couldn't say
							
							myself! If you ask me, I couldn't tell you."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p34">"Come, don't you know why you're glad?" said Rakitin, grinning.
							
							"You used to be always pestering me to bring him, you'd some object, I
							
							suppose."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p35">"I had a different object once, but now that's over, this is not
							
							the moment. I say, I want you to have something nice. I am so
							
							good-natured now. You sit down, too, Rakitin; why are you standing?
							
							You've sat down already? There's no fear of Rakitin's forgetting to
							
							look after himself. Look, Alyosha, he's sitting there opposite us,
							
							so offended that I didn't ask him to sit down before you. Ugh, Rakitin
							
							is such a one to take offence!" laughed Grushenka. "Don't be angry,
							
							Rakitin, I'm kind to-day. Why are you so depressed, Alyosha? Are you
							
							afraid of me?" She peeped into his eyes with merry mockery.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p36">"He's sad. The promotion has not been given," boomed Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p37">"His elder stinks."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p38">"What? You are talking some nonsense, you want to say something
							
							nasty. Be quiet, you stupid! Let me sit on your knee, Alyosha, like
							
							this." She suddenly skipped forward and jumped, laughing, on his knee,
							
							like a nestling kitten, with her right arm about his neck. "I'll cheer
							
							you up, my pious boy. Yes, really, will you let me sit on your knee?
							
							You won't be angry? If you tell me, I'll get off?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p39">Alyosha did not speak. He sat afraid to move, he heard her
							
							words, "If you tell me, I'll get off," but he did not answer. But
							
							there was nothing in his heart such as Rakitin, for instance, watching
							
							him malignantly from his corner, might have expected or fancied. The
							
							great grief in his heart swallowed up every sensation that might
							
							have been aroused, and, if only he could have thought clearly at
							
							that moment, he would have realised that he had now the strongest
							
							armour to protect him from every lust and temptation. Yet in spite
							
							of the vague irresponsiveness of his spiritual condition and the
							
							sorrow that overwhelmed him, he could not help wondering at a new
							
							and strange sensation in his heart. This woman, this "dreadful" woman,
							
							had no terror for him now, none of that terror that had stirred in his
							
							soul at any passing thought of woman. On the contrary, this woman,
							
							dreaded above all women, sitting now on his knee, holding him in her
							
							arms, aroused in him now a quite different, unexpected, peculiar
							
							feeling, a feeling of the intensest and purest interest without a
							
							trace of fear, of his former terror. That was what instinctively
							
							surprised him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p40">"You've talked nonsense enough," cried Rakitin, "you'd much better
							
							give us some champagne. You owe it me, you know you do!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p41">"Yes, I really do. Do you know, Alyosha, I promised him
							
							champagne on the top of everything, if he'd bring you? I'll have
							
							some too! Fenya, Fenya, bring us the bottle Mitya left! Look sharp!
							
							Though I am so stingy, I'll stand a bottle, not for you, Rakitin,
							
							you're a toadstool, but he is a falcon! And though my heart is full of
							
							something very different, so be it, I'll drink with you. I long for
							
							some dissipation."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p42">"But what is the matter with you? And what is this message, may
							
							I ask, or is it a secret?" Rakitin put in inquisitively, doing his
							
							best to pretend not to notice the snubs that were being continually
							
							aimed at him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p43">"Ech, it's not a secret, and you know it, too," Grushenka said, in
							
							a voice suddenly anxious, turning her head towards Rakitin, and
							
							drawing a little away from Alyosha, though she still sat on his knee
							
							with her arm round his neck. "My officer is coming, Rakitin, my
							
							officer is coming."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p44">"I heard he was coming, but is he so near?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p45">"He is at Mokroe now; he'll send a messenger from there, so he
							
							wrote; I got a letter from him to-day. I am expecting the messenger
							
							every minute."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p46">"You don't say so! Why at Mokroe?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p47">"That's a long story, I've told you enough."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p48">"Mitya'll be up to something now- I say! Does he know or doesn't
							
							he?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p49">"He know! Of course he doesn't. If he knew, there would be murder.
							
							But I am not afraid of that now, I am not afraid of his knife. Be
							
							quiet, Rakitin, don't remind me of Dmitri Fyodorovitch, he has bruised
							
							my heart. And I don't want to think of that at this moment. I can
							
							think of Alyosha here, I can look at Alyosha... smile at me, dear,
							
							cheer up, smile at my foolishness, at my pleasure.... Ah, he's
							
							smiling, he's smiling! How kindly he looks at me! And you know,
							
							Alyosha, I've been thinking all this time you were angry with me,
							
							because of the day before yesterday, because of that young lady. I was
							
							a cur, that's the truth.... But it's a good thing it happened so. It
							
							was a horrid thing, but a good thing too." Grushenka smiled dreamily
							
							and a little cruel line showed in her smile. "Mitya told me that she
							
							screamed out that I 'ought to be flogged.' I did insult her
							
							dreadfully. She sent for me, she wanted to make a conquest of me, to
							
							win me over with her chocolate.... No, it's a good thing it did end
							
							like that." She smiled again. "But I am still afraid of your being
							
							angry."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p50">"Yes, that's really true," Rakitin put in suddenly with genuine
							
							surprise. "Alyosha, she is really afraid of a chicken like you."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p51">"He is a chicken to you, Rakitin... because you've no
							
							conscience, that's what it is! You see, I love him with all my soul,
							
							that's how it is! Alyosha, do you believe I love you with all my
							
							soul?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p52">"Ah, you shameless woman! She is making you a declaration,
							
							Alexey!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p53">"Well, what of it, I love him!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p54">"And what about your officer? And the priceless message from
							
							Mokroe?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p55">"That is quite different."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p56">"That's a woman's way of looking at it!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p57">"Don't you make me angry, Rakitin." Grushenka caught him up hotly.
							
							"This is quite different. I love Alyosha in a different way. It's
							
							true, Alyosha, I had sly designs on you before. For I am a horrid,
							
							violent creature. But at other times I've looked upon you, Alyosha, as
							
							my conscience. I've kept thinking 'how anyone like that must despise a
							
							nasty thing like me.' I thought that the day before yesterday, as I
							
							ran home from the young lady's. I have thought of you a long time in
							
							that way, Alyosha, and Mitya knows; I've talked to him about it. Mitya
							
							understands. Would you believe it, I sometimes look at you and feel
							
							ashamed, utterly ashamed of myself.... And how, and since when, I
							
							began to think about you like that, I can't say, I don't remember...."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p58">Fenya came in and put a tray with an uncorked bottle and three
							
							glasses of champagne on the table.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p59">"Here's the champagne!" cried Rakitin. "You're excited, Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna, and not yourself. When you've had a glass of
							
							champagne, you'll be ready to dance. Eh, they can't even do that
							
							properly," he added, looking at the bottle. "The old woman's poured it
							
							out in the kitchen and the bottle's been brought in warm and without a
							
							cork. Well, let me have some, anyway."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p60">He went up to the table, took a glass, emptied it at one gulp
							
							and poured himself out another.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p61">"One doesn't often stumble upon champagne," he said, licking his
							
							lips. "Now, Alyosha, take a glass, show what you can do! What shall we
							
							drink to? The gates of paradise? Take a glass, Grushenka, you drink to
							
							the gates of paradise, too."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p62">"What gates of paradise?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p63">She took a glass, Alyosha took his, tasted it and put it back.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p64">"No, I'd better not," he smiled gently.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p65">"And you bragged!" cried Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p66">"Well, if so, I won't either," chimed in Grushenka, "I really
							
							don't want any. You can drink the whole bottle alone, Rakitin. If
							
							Alyosha has some, I will."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p67">"What touching sentimentality!" said Rakitin tauntingly; "and
							
							she's sitting on his knee, too! He's got something to grieve over, but
							
							what's the matter with you? He is rebelling against his God and
							
							ready to eat sausage...."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p68">"How so?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p69">"His elder died to-day, Father Zossima, the saint."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p70">"So Father Zossima is dead," cried Grushenka. "Good God, I did not
							
							know!" She crossed herself devoutly. "Goodness, what have I been
							
							doing, sitting on his knee like this at such a moment! She started
							
							up as though in dismay, instantly slipped off his knee and sat down on
							
							the sofa.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p71">Alyosha bent a long wondering look upon her and a light seemed
							
							to dawn in his face.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p72">"Rakitin," he said suddenly, in a firm and loud voice; "don't
							
							taunt me with having rebelled against God. I don't want to feel
							
							angry with you, so you must be kinder, too; I've lost a treasure
							
							such as you have never had, and you cannot judge me now. You had
							
							much better look at her- do you see how she has pity on me? I came
							
							here to find a wicked soul- I felt drawn to evil because I was base
							
							and evil myself, and I've found a true sister; I have found a
							
							treasure- a loving heart. She had pity on me just now.... Agrafena
							
							Alexandrovna, I am speaking of you. You've raised my soul from the
							
							depths."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p73">Alyosha's lips were quivering and he caught his breath.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p74">"She has saved you, it seems," laughed Rakitin spitefully. "And
							
							she meant to get you in her clutches, do your realise that?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p75">"Stay, Rakitin." Grushenka jumped up. "Hush, both of you. Now I'll
							
							tell you all about it. Hush, Alyosha, your words make me ashamed,
							
							for I am bad and not good- that's what I am. And you hush, Rakitin,
							
							because you are telling lies. I had the low idea of trying to get
							
							him in my clutches, but now you are lying, now it's all different. And
							
							don't let me hear anything more from you, Rakitin."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p76">All this Grushenka said with extreme emotion.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p77">"They are both crazy," said Rakitin, looking at them with
							
							amazement. "I feel as though I were in a madhouse. They're both
							
							getting so feeble they'll begin crying in a minute."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p78">"I shall begin to cry, I shall," repeated Grushenka. "He called me
							
							his sister and I shall never forget that. Only let me tell you,
							
							Rakitin, though I am bad, I did give away an onion."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p79">"An onion? Hang it all, you really are crazy."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p80">Rakitin wondered at their enthusiasm. He was aggrieved and
							
							annoyed, though he might have reflected that each of them was just
							
							passing through a spiritual crisis such as does not come often in a
							
							lifetime. But though Rakitin was very sensitive about everything
							
							that concerned himself, he was very obtuse as regards the feelings and
							
							sensations of others- partly from his youth and inexperience, partly
							
							from his intense egoism.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p81">"You see, Alyosha," Grushenka turned to him with a nervous
							
							laugh. "I was boasting when I told Rakitin I had given away an
							
							onion, but it's not to boast I tell you about it. It's only a story,
							
							but it's a nice story. I used to hear it when I was a child from
							
							Matryona, my cook, who is still with me. It's like this. Once upon a
							
							time there was a peasant woman and a very wicked woman she was. And
							
							she died and did not leave a single good deed behind. The devils
							
							caught her and plunged her into the lake of fire. So her guardian
							
							angel stood and wondered what good deed of hers he could remember to
							
							tell to God; 'She once pulled up an onion in her garden,' said he,
							
							'and gave it to a beggar woman.' And God answered: 'You take that
							
							onion then, hold it out to her in the lake, and let her take hold
							
							and be pulled out. And if you can pull her out of the lake, let her
							
							come to Paradise, but if the onion breaks, then the woman must stay
							
							where she is.' The angel ran to the woman and held out the onion to
							
							her. 'Come,' said he, 'catch hold and I'll pull you out.' he began
							
							cautiously pulling her out. He had just pulled her right out, when the
							
							other sinners in the lake, seeing how she was being drawn out, began
							
							catching hold of her so as to be pulled out with her. But she was a
							
							very wicked woman and she began kicking them. 'I'm to be pulled out,
							
							not you. It's my onion, not yours.' As soon as she said that, the
							
							onion broke. And the woman fell into the lake and she is burning there
							
							to this day. So the angel wept and went away. So that's the story,
							
							Alyosha; I know it by heart, for I am that wicked woman myself. I
							
							boasted to Rakitin that I had given away an onion, but to you I'll
							
							say: 'I've done nothing but give away one onion all my life, that's
							
							the only good deed I've done.' don't praise me, Alyosha, don't think
							
							me good, I am bad, I am a wicked woman and you make me ashamed if
							
							you praise me. Eh, I must confess everything. Listen, Alyosha. I was
							
							so anxious to get hold of you that I promised Rakitin twenty-five
							
							roubles if he would bring you to me. Stay, Rakitin, wait!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p82">She went with rapid steps to the table, opened a drawer, pulled
							
							out a purse and took from it a twenty-five rouble note.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p83">"What nonsense! What nonsense!" cried Rakitin, disconcerted.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p84">"Take it. Rakitin, I owe it you, there's no fear of your
							
							refusing it, you asked for it yourself." And she threw the note to
							
							him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p85">"Likely I should refuse it," boomed Rakitin, obviously abashed,
							
							but carrying off his confusion with a swagger. "That will come in very
							
							handy; fools are made for wise men's profit."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p86">"And now hold your tongue, Rakitin, what I am going to say now
							
							is not for your ears. Sit down in that corner and keep quiet. You
							
							don't like us, so hold your tongue."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p87">"What should I like you for?" Rakitin snarled, not concealing
							
							his ill-humour. He put the twenty-five rouble note in his pocket and
							
							he felt ashamed at Alyosha's seeing it. He had reckoned on receiving
							
							his payment later, without Alyosha's knowing of it, and now, feeling
							
							ashamed, he lost his temper. Till that moment he had thought it
							
							discreet not to contradict Grushenka too flatly in spite of her
							
							snubbing, since he had something to get out of her. But now he, too,
							
							was angry:
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p88">"One loves people for some reason, but what have either of you
							
							done for me?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p89">"You should love people without a reason, as Alyosha does."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p90">"How does he love you? How has he shown it, that you make such a
							
							fuss about it?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p91">Grushenka was standing in the middle of the room; she spoke with
							
							heat and there were hysterical notes in her voice.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p92">"Hush, Rakitin, you know nothing about us! And don't dare to speak
							
							to me like that again. How dare you be so familiar! Sit in that corner
							
							and be quiet, as though you were my footman! And now, Alyosha, I'll
							
							tell you the whole truth, that you may see what a wretch I am! I am
							
							not talking to Rakitin, but to you. I wanted to ruin you, Alyosha,
							
							that's the holy truth; I quite meant to. I wanted to so much, that I
							
							bribed Rakitin to bring you. And why did I want to do such a thing?
							
							You knew nothing about it, Alyosha, you turned away from me; if you
							
							passed me, you dropped your eyes. And I've looked at you a hundred
							
							times before to-day; I began asking everyone about you. Your face
							
							haunted my heart. 'He despises me,' I thought; 'he won't even look
							
							at me.' And I felt it so much at last that I wondered at myself for
							
							being so frightened of a boy. I'll get him in my clutches and laugh at
							
							him. I was full of spite and anger. Would you believe it, nobody
							
							here dares talk or think of coming to Agrafena Alexandrovna with any
							
							evil purpose. Old Kuzma is the only man I have anything to do with
							
							here; I was bound and sold to him; Satan brought us together, but
							
							there has been no one else. But looking at you, I thought, I'll get
							
							him in my clutches and laugh at him. You see what a spiteful cur I am,
							
							and you called me your sister! And now that man who wronged me has
							
							come; I sit here waiting for a message from him. And do you know
							
							what that man has been to me? Five years ago, when Kuzma brought me
							
							here, I used to shut myself up, that no one might have sight or
							
							sound of me. I was a silly slip of a girl; I used to sit here sobbing;
							
							I used to lie awake all night, thinking: 'Where is he now, the man who
							
							wronged me? He is laughing at me with another woman, most likely. If
							
							only I could see him, if I could meet him again, I'd pay him out,
							
							I'd pay him out!' At night I used to lie sobbing into my pillow in the
							
							dark, and I used to brood over it; I used to tear my heart on
							
							purpose and gloat over my anger. 'I'll pay him out, I'll pay him
							
							out! That's what I used to cry out in the dark. And when I suddenly
							
							thought that I should really do nothing to him, and that he was
							
							laughing at me then, or perhaps had utterly forgotten me, I would
							
							fling myself on the floor, melt into helpless tears, and lie there
							
							shaking till dawn. In the morning I would get up more spiteful than
							
							a dog, ready to tear the whole world to pieces. And then what do you
							
							think? I began saving money, I became hardhearted, grew stout- grew
							
							wiser, would you say? No, no one in the whole world sees it, no one
							
							knows it, but when night comes on, I sometimes lie as I did five years
							
							ago, when I was a silly girl, clenching my teeth and crying all night,
							
							thinking, 'I'll pay him out, I'll pay him out!' Do you hear? Well
							
							then, now you understand me. A month ago a letter came to me- he was
							
							coming, he was a widower, he wanted to see me. It took my breath away;
							
							then I suddenly thought: 'If he comes and whistles to call me, I shall
							
							creep back to him like a beaten dog.' I couldn't believe myself. Am
							
							I so abject? Shall I run to him or not? And I've been in such a rage
							
							with myself all this month that I am worse than I was five years
							
							ago. Do you see now, Alyosha, what a violent, vindictive creature I
							
							am? I have shown you the whole truth! I played with Mitya to keep me
							
							from running to that other. Hush, Rakitin, it's not for you to judge
							
							me, I am not speaking to you. Before you came in, I was lying here
							
							waiting, brooding, deciding my whole future life, and you can never
							
							know what was in my heart. Yes, Alyosha, tell your young lady not to
							
							be angry with me for what happened the day before yesterday.... Nobody
							
							in the whole world knows what I am going through now, and no one
							
							ever can know.... For perhaps I shall take a knife with me to-day, I
							
							can't make up my mind..."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p93">And at this "tragic" phrase Grushenka broke down, hid her face
							
							in her hands, flung herself on the sofa pillows, and sobbed like a
							
							little child.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p94">Alyosha got up and went to Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p95">"Misha," he said, "don't be angry. She wounded you, but don't be
							
							angry. You heard what she said just now? You mustn't ask too much of
							
							human endurance, one must be merciful."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p96">Alyosha said this at the instinctive prompting of his heart. He
							
							felt obliged to speak and he turned to Rakitin. If Rakitin had not
							
							been there, he would have spoken to the air. But Rakitin looked at him
							
							ironically and Alyosha stopped short.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p97">"You were so primed up with your elder's reading last night that
							
							now you have to let it off on me, Alexey, man of God!" said Rakitin,
							
							with a smile of hatred.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p98">"Don't laugh, Rakitin, don't smile, don't talk of the dead- he was
							
							better than anyone in the world!" cried Alyosha, with tears in his
							
							voice. "I didn't speak to you as a judge but as the lowest of the
							
							judged. What am I beside her? I came here seeking my ruin, and said to
							
							myself, 'What does it matter?' in my cowardliness, but she, after five
							
							years in torment, as soon as anyone says a word from the heart to her-
							
							it makes her forget everything, forgive everything, in her tears!
							
							The man who has wronged her has come back, he sends for her and she
							
							forgives him everything, and hastens joyfully to meet him and she
							
							won't take a knife with her. She won't! No, I am not like that. I
							
							don't know whether you are, Misha, but I am not like that. It's a
							
							lesson to me.... She is more loving than we.... Have you heard her
							
							speak before of what she has just told us? No, you haven't; if you
							
							had, you'd have understood her long ago... and the person insulted the
							
							day before yesterday must forgive her, too! She will, when she
							
							knows... and she shall know.... This soul is not yet at peace with
							
							itself, one must be tender with... there may be a treasure in that
							
							soul...."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p99">Alyosha stopped, because he caught his breath. In spite of his
							
							ill-humour Rakitin looked at him with astonishment. He had never
							
							expected such a tirade from the gentle Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p100">"She's found someone to plead her cause! Why, are you in love with
							
							her? Agrafena Alexandrovna, our monk's really in love with you, you've
							
							made a conquest!" he cried, with a coarse laugh.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p101">Grushenka lifted her head from the pillow and looked at Alyosha
							
							with a tender smile shining on her tear-stained face.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p102">"Let him alone, Alyosha, my cherub; you see what he is, he is
							
							not a person for you to speak to. Mihail Osipovitch," she turned to
							
							Rakitin, "I meant to beg your pardon for being rude to you, but now
							
							I don't want to. Alyosha, come to me, sit down here." She beckoned
							
							to him with a happy smile. "That's right, sit here. Tell me," she took
							
							him by the hand and peeped into his face, smiling, "tell me, do I love
							
							that man or not? The man who wronged me, do I love him or not?
							
							Before you came, I lay here in the dark, asking my heart whether I
							
							loved him. Decide for me, Alyosha, the time has come, it shall be as
							
							you say. Am I to forgive him or not?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p103">"But you have forgiven him already," said Alyosha, smiling.
							
								"</p><p id="iii_9-p104">Yes, I really have forgiven him," Grushenka murmured
							
							thoughtfully. "What an abject heart! To my abject heart!" She snatched
							
							up a glass from the table, emptied it at a gulp, lifted it in the
							
							air and flung it on the floor. The glass broke with a crash. A
							
							little cruel line came into her smile.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p105">"Perhaps I haven't forgiven him, though," she said, with a sort of
							
							menace in her voice, and she dropped her eyes to the ground as
							
							though she were talking to herself. "Perhaps my heart is only
							
							getting ready to forgive. I shall struggle with my heart. You see,
							
							Alyosha, I've grown to love my tears in these five years.... Perhaps I
							
							only love my resentment, not him..."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p106">"Well, I shouldn't care to be in his shoes," hissed Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p107">"Well, you won't be, Rakitin, you'll never be in his shoes. You
							
							shall black my shoes, Rakitin, that's the place you are fit for.
							
							You'll never get a woman like me... and he won't either, perhaps..."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p108">"Won't he? Then why are you dressed up like that?" said Rakitin,
							
							with a venomous sneer.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p109">"Don't taunt me with dressing up, Rakitin, you don't know all that
							
							is in my heart! If I choose to tear off my finery, I'll tear it off at
							
							once, this minute," she cried in a resonant voice. "You don't know
							
							what that finery is for, Rakitin! Perhaps I shall see him and say:
							
							'Have you ever seen me look like this before?' He left me a thin,
							
							consumptive cry-baby of seventeen. I'll sit by him, fascinate him
							
							and work him up. 'Do you see what I am like now?' I'll say to him;
							
							'well, and that's enough for you, my dear sir, there's many a slip
							
							twixt the cup and the lip! That may be what the finery is for,
							
							Rakitin." Grushenka finished with a malicious laugh. "I'm violent
							
							and resentful, Alyosha, I'll tear off my finery, I'll destroy my
							
							beauty, I'll scorch my face, slash it with a knife, and turn beggar.
							
							If I choose, I won't go anywhere now to see anyone. If I choose,
							
							I'll send Kuzma back all he has ever given me, to-morrow, and all
							
							his money and I'll go out charing for the rest of my life. You think I
							
							wouldn't do it, Rakitin, that I would not dare to do it? I would, I
							
							would, I could do it directly, only don't exasperate me... and I'll
							
							send him about his business, I'll snap my fingers in his face, he
							
							shall never see me again!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p110">She uttered the last words in an hysterical scream, but broke down
							
							again, hid her face in her hands, buried it in the pillow and shook
							
							with sobs.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p111">Rakitin got up.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p112">"It's time we were off," he said, "it's late, we shall be shut out
							
							of the monastery."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p113">Grushenka leapt up from her place.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p114">"Surely you don't want to go, Alyosha!" she cried, in mournful
							
							surprise. "What are you doing to me? You've stirred up my feeling,
							
							tortured me, and now you'll leave me to face this night alone!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p115">"He can hardly spend the night with you! Though if he wants to,
							
							let him! I'll go alone," Rakitin scoffed jeeringly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p116">"Hush, evil tongue!" Grushenka cried angrily at him; "you never
							
							said such words to me as he has come to say."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p117">"What has he said to you so special?" asked Rakitin irritably.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p118">"I can't say, I don't know. I don't know what he said to me, it
							
							went straight to my heart; he has wrung my heart.... He is the
							
							first, the only one who has pitied me, that's what it is. Why did
							
							you not come before, you angel?" She fell on her knees before him as
							
							though in a sudden frenzy. "I've been waiting all my life for
							
							someone like you, I knew that someone like you would come and
							
							forgive me. I believed that, nasty as I am, someone would really
							
							love me, not only with a shameful love!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p119">"What have I done to you?" answered Alyosha, bending over her with
							
							a tender smile, and gently taking her by the hands; "I only gave you
							
							an onion, nothing but a tiny little onion, that was all!"
							
								He was moved to tears himself as he said it. At that moment
							
							there was a sudden noise in the passage, someone came into the hall.
							
							Grushenka jumped up, seeming greatly alarmed. Fenya ran noisily into
							
							the room, crying out:
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p120">"Mistress, mistress darling, a messenger has galloped up," she
							
							cried, breathless and joyful. "A carriage from Mokroe for you, Timofey
							
							the driver, with three horses, they are just putting in fresh
							
							horses.... A letter, here's the letter, mistress."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p121">A letter was in her hand and she waved it in the air all the while
							
							she talked. Grushenka snatched the letter from her and carried it to
							
							the candle. It was only a note, a few lines. She read it in one
							
							instant.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p122">"He has sent for me," she cried, her face white and distorted,
							
							with a wan smile; "he whistles! Crawl back, little dog!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p123">But only for one instant she stood as though hesitating;
							
							suddenly the blood rushed to her head and sent a glow to her cheeks.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p124">"I will go," she cried; "five years of my life! Good-bye!
							
							Good-bye, Alyosha, my fate is sealed. Go, go, leave me all of you,
							
							don't let me see you again! Grushenka is flying to a new life....
							
							Don't you remember evil against me either, Rakitin. I may be going
							
							to my death! Ugh! I feel as though I were drunk!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p125">She suddenly left them and ran into her bedroom.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p126">"Well, she has no thoughts for us now!" grumbled Rakitin. "Let's
							
							go, or we may hear that feminine shriek again. I am sick of all
							
							these tears and cries."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p127">Alyosha mechanically let himself be led out. In the yard stood a
							
							covered cart. Horses were being taken out of the shafts, men were
							
							running to and fro with a lantern. Three fresh horses were being led
							
							in at the open gate. But when Alyosha and Rakitin reached the bottom
							
							of the steps, Grushenka's bedroom window was suddenly opened and she
							
							called in a ringing voice after Alyosha:
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p128">"Alyosha, give my greetings to your brother Mitya and tell him not
							
							to remember evil against me, though I have brought him misery. And
							
							tell him, too, in my words: 'Grushenka has fallen to a scoundrel,
							
							and not to you, noble heart.' And add, too, that Grushenka loved him
							
							only one hour, only one short hour she loved him- so let him
							
							remember that hour all his life-say, 'Grushenka tells you to!'
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p129">She ended in a voice full of sobs. The window was shut with a
							
							slam.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p130">"H'm, h'm!" growled Rakitin, laughing, "she murders your brother
							
							Mitya and then tells him to remember it all his life! What ferocity!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p131">Alyosha made no reply, he seemed not to have heard. He walked fast
							
							beside Rakitin as though in a terrible hurry. He was lost in thought
							
							and moved mechanically. Rakitin felt a sudden twinge as though he
							
							had been touched on an open wound. He had expected something quite
							
							different by bringing Grushenka and Alyosha together. Something very
							
							different from what he had hoped for had happened.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p132">"He is a Pole, that officer of hers," he began again,
							
							restraining himself; "and indeed he is not an officer at all now. He
							
							served in the customs in Siberia, somewhere on the Chinese frontier,
							
							some puny little beggar of a Pole, I expect. Lost his job, they say.
							
							He's heard now that Grushenka's saved a little money, so he's turned
							
							up again- that's the explanation of the mystery."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p133">Again Alyosha seemed not to hear. Rakitin could not control
							
							himself.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p134">"Well, so you've saved the sinner?" he laughed spitefully. "Have
							
							you turned the Magdalene into the true path? Driven out the seven
							
							devils, eh? So you see the miracles you were looking out for just
							
							now have come to pass!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p135">"Hush, Rakitin," Alyosha, answered with an aching heart.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p136">So you despise me now for those twenty-five roubles? I've sold my
							
							friend, you think. But you are not Christ, you know, and I am not
							
							Judas."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p137">"Oh, Rakitin, I assure you I'd forgotten about it," cried Alyosha,
							
							"you remind me of it yourself..."
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p138">But this was the last straw for Rakitin.
							
								</p><p id="iii_9-p139">"Damnation take you all and each of you" he cried suddenly, "why
							
							the devil did I take you up? I don't want to know you from this time
							
							forward. Go alone, there's your road!" And he turned abruptly into
							
							another street, leaving Alyosha alone in the dark. Alyosha came out of
							
							the town and walked across the fields to the monastery.</p>
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - Cana of Galilee" prev="iii_9" next="ii_10" id="iv_5">
					
					
							<p id="iv_5-p1">IT was very late, according to the monastery ideas, when Alyosha
							
							returned to the hermitage; the door-keeper let him in by a special
							
							entrance. It had struck nine o'clock- the hour of rest and repose
							
							after a day of such agitation for all. Alyosha timidly opened the door
							
							and went into the elder's cell where his coffin was now standing.
							
							There was no one in the cell but Father Paissy, reading the Gospel
							
							in solitude over the coffin, and the young novice Porfiry, who,
							
							exhausted by the previous night's conversation and the disturbing
							
							incidents of the day, was sleeping the deep sound sleep of youth on
							
							the floor of the other room. Though Father Paissy heard Alyosha come
							
							in, he did not even look in his direction. Alyosha turned to the right
							
							from the door to the corner, fell on his knees and began to pray.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p2">His soul was overflowing but with mingled feelings; no single
							
							sensation stood out distinctly; on the contrary, one drove out another
							
							in a slow, continual rotation. But there was a sweetness in his
							
							heart and, strange to say, Alyosha was not surprised at it. Again he
							
							saw that coffin before him, the hidden dead figure so precious to him,
							
							but the weeping and poignant grief of the morning was no longer aching
							
							in his soul. As soon as he came in, he fell down before the coffin
							
							as before a holy shrine, but joy, joy was glowing in his mind and in
							
							his heart. The one window of the cell was open, the air was fresh
							
							and cool. "So the smell must have become stronger, if they opened
							
							the window," thought Alyosha. But even this thought of the smell of
							
							corruption, which had seemed to him so awful and humiliating a few
							
							hours before, no longer made him feel miserable or indignant. He began
							
							quietly praying, but he soon felt that he was praying almost
							
							mechanically. Fragments of thought floated through his soul, flashed
							
							like stars and went out again at once, to be succeeded by others.
							
							But yet there was reigning in his soul a sense of the wholeness of
							
							things- something steadfast and comforting- and he was aware of it
							
							himself. Sometimes he began praying ardently, he longed to pour out
							
							his thankfulness and love...
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p3">But when he had begun to pray, he passed suddenly to something
							
							else, and sank into thought, forgetting both the prayer and what had
							
							interrupted it. He began listening to what Father Paissy was
							
							reading, but worn out with exhaustion he gradually began to doze.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p4">"And the third day there was a marriage in Cana of Galilee,"
							
							read Father Paissy. "And the mother of Jesus was there; And both Jesus
							
							was there; And both Jesus was called, and his disciples, to the
							
							marriage."
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p5">"Marriage? What's that?... A marriage!" floated whirling through
							
							Alyosha's mind. "There is happiness for her, too... She has gone to
							
							the feast.... No, she has not taken the knife.... That was only a
							
							tragic phrase.... Well... tragic phrases should be forgiven, they must
							
							be. Tragic phrases comfort the heart... Without them, sorrow would
							
							be too heavy for men to bear. Rakitin has gone off to the back
							
							alley. As long as Rakitin broods over his wrongs, he will always go
							
							off to the back alley.... But the high road... The road is wide and
							
							straight and bright as crystal, and the sun is at the end of it....
							
							Ah!... What's being read?"...
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p6">"And when they wanted wine, the mother of Jesus saith unto him,
							
							They have no wine"... Alyosha heard.
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p7">"Ah, yes, I was missing that, and I didn't want to miss it, I love
							
							that passage: it's Cana of Galilee, the first miracle.... Ah, that
							
							miracle! Ah, that sweet miracle! It was not men's grief, but their joy
							
							Christ visited, He worked His first miracle to help men's gladness....
							
							'He who loves men loves their gladness, too'... He was always
							
							repeating that, it was one of his leading ideas... 'There's no
							
							living without joy,' Mitya says.... Yes, Mitya.... 'Everything that is
							
							true and good is always full of forgiveness,' he used to say that,
							
							too"...
							
							
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p8" /><p id="iv_5-p9">            "Jesus saith unto her, Woman, what has it to do
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p10">                with thee or me? Mine hour not yet come.
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p11">            "His mother saith unto the servants, Whatsoever
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p12">                he saith unto you, do it". . .
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p13" /><p id="iv_5-p14">"Do it.... Gladness, the gladness of some poor, very poor,
							
							people.... Of course they were poor, since they hadn't wine enough
							
							even at a wedding.... The historians write that, in those days, the
							
							people living about the Lake of Gennesaret were the poorest that can
							
							possibly be imagined... and another great heart, that other great
							
							being, His Mother, knew that He had come not only to make His great
							
							terrible sacrifice. She knew that His heart was open even to the
							
							simple, artless merrymaking of some obscure and unlearned people,
							
							who had warmly bidden Him to their poor wedding. 'Mine hour is not yet
							
							come,' He said, with a soft smile (He must have smiled gently to her).
							
							And, indeed, was it to make wine abundant at poor weddings He had come
							
							down to earth? And yet He went and did as she asked Him.... Ah, he
							
							is reading again"...
							
							
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p15" /><p id="iv_5-p16">      "Jesus saith unto them, Fill the waterpots with water.
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p17">          And they filled them up to the brim.
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p18">      "And he saith unto them, Draw out now and bear unto
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p19">          the governor of the feast. And they bear it.
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p20">      "When the ruler of the feast had tasted the water
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p21">          that was made wine, and knew not whence it was
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p22">          (but the servants which drew the water knew);
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p23">          the governor of the feast called the bridegroom,
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p24">      "And saith unto him, Every man at the beginning doth
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p25">          set forth good wine; and when men have well drunk,
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p26">          that which is worse; but thou hast kept
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p27">                                   the good wine until now."
							
							
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p28" /><p id="iv_5-p29">"But what's this, what's this? Why is the room growing wider?...
							
							Ah, yes... It's the marriage, the wedding... yes, of course. Here
							
							are the guests, here are the young couple sitting, and the merry crowd
							
							and... Where is the wise governor of the feast? But who is this?
							
							Who? Again the walls are receding.... Who is getting up there from the
							
							great table? What!... He here, too? But he's in the coffin... but he's
							
							here, too. He has stood up, he sees me, he is coming here.... God!"...
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p30">Yes, he came up to him, to him, he, the little, thin old man, with
							
							tiny wrinkles on his face, joyful and laughing softly. There was no
							
							coffin now, and he was in the same dress as he had worn yesterday
							
							sitting with them, when the visitors had gathered about him. His
							
							face was uncovered, his eyes were shining. How was this, then? He,
							
							too, had been called to the feast. He, too, at the marriage of Cana in
							
							Galilee....
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p31">"Yes, my dear, I am called, too, called and bidden," he heard a
							
							soft voice saying over him. "Why have you hidden yourself here, out of
							
							sight? You come and join us too."
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p32">It was his voice, the voice of Father Zossima. And it must be
							
							he, since he called him!
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p33">The elder raised Alyosha by the hand and he rose from his knees.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p34">"We are rejoicing," the little, thin old man went on. "We are
							
							drinking the new wine, the wine of new, great gladness; do you see how
							
							many guests? Here are the bride and bridegroom, here is the wise
							
							governor of the feast, he is tasting the new wine. Why do you wonder
							
							at me? I gave an onion to a beggar, so I, too, am here. And many
							
							here have given only an onion each- only one little onion.... What are
							
							all our deeds? And you, my gentle one, you, my kind boy, you too
							
							have known how to give a famished woman an onion to-day. Begin your
							
							work, dear one, begin it, gentle one! Do you see our Sun, do you see
							
							Him?"
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p35">"I am afraid... I dare not look," whispered Alyosha.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p36">"Do not fear Him. He is terrible in His greatness, awful in His
							
							sublimity, but infinitely merciful. He has made Himself like unto us
							
							from love and rejoices with us. He is changing the water into wine
							
							that the gladness of the guests may not be cut short. He is
							
							expecting new guests, He is calling new ones unceasingly for ever
							
							and ever.... There they are bringing new wine. Do you see they are
							
							bringing the vessels..."
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p37">Something glowed in Alyosha's heart, something filled it till it
							
							ached, tears of rapture rose from his soul.... He stretched out his
							
							hands, uttered a cry and waked up.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p38">Again the coffin, the open window, and the soft, solemn,
							
							distinct reading of the Gospel. But Alyosha did not listen to the
							
							reading. It was strange, he had fallen asleep on his knees, but now he
							
							was on his feet, and suddenly, as though thrown forward, with three
							
							firm rapid steps he went right up to the coffin. His shoulder
							
							brushed against Father Paissy without his noticing it. Father Paissy
							
							raised his eyes for an instant from his book, but looked away again at
							
							once, seeing that something strange was happening to the boy.
							
							Alyosha gazed for half a minute at the coffin, at the covered,
							
							motionless dead man that lay in the coffin, with the ikon on his
							
							breast and the peaked cap with the octangular cross on his head. He
							
							had only just been hearing his voice, and that voice was still ringing
							
							in his ears. He was listening, still expecting other words, but
							
							suddenly he turned sharply and went out of the cell.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p39">He did not stop on the steps either, but went quickly down; his
							
							soul, overflowing with rapture, yearned for freedom, space,
							
							openness. The vault of heaven, full of soft, shining stars,
							
							stretched vast and fathomless above him. The Milky Way ran in two pale
							
							streams from the zenith to the horizon. The fresh, motionless, still
							
							night enfolded the earth. The white towers and golden domes of the
							
							cathedral gleamed out against the sapphire sky. The gorgeous autumn
							
							flowers, in the beds round the house, were slumbering till morning.
							
							The silence of earth seemed to melt into the silence of the heavens.
							
							The mystery of earth was one with the mystery of the stars....
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p40">Alyosha stood, gazed, and suddenly threw himself down on the
							
							earth. He did not know why he embraced it. He could not have told
							
							why he longed so irresistibly to kiss it, to kiss it all. But he
							
							kissed it weeping, sobbing, and watering it with his tears, and
							
							vowed passionately to love it, to love it for ever and ever. "Water
							
							the earth with the tears of your joy and love those tears," echoed
							
							in his soul.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p41">What was he weeping over?
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p42">Oh! in his rapture he was weeping even over those stars, which
							
							were shining to him from the abyss of space, and "he was not ashamed
							
							of that ecstasy." There seemed to be threads from all those
							
							innumerable worlds of God, linking his soul to them, and it was
							
							trembling all over "in contact with other worlds." He longed to
							
							forgive everyone and for everything, and to beg forgiveness. Oh, not
							
							for himself, but for all men, for all and for everything. "And
							
							others are praying for me too," echoed again in his soul. But with
							
							every instant he felt clearly and, as it were, tangibly, that
							
							something firm and unshakable as that vault of heaven had entered into
							
							his soul. It was as though some idea had seized the sovereignty of his
							
							mind- and it was for all his life and for ever and ever. He had fallen
							
							on the earth a weak boy, but he rose up a resolute champion, and he
							
							knew and felt it suddenly at the very moment of his ecstasy. And
							
							never, never, his life long, could Alyosha forget that minute.
							
								</p><p id="iv_5-p43">"Someone visited my soul in that hour," he used to say afterwards,
							
							with implicit faith in his words.
							
							</p><p id="iv_5-p44">Within three days he left the monastery in accordance with the
							
							words of his elder, who had bidden him "sojourn in the world."</p>					
					
					</div4> 			  			
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book VIII - Mitya" prev="iv_5" next="i_12" id="ii_10">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - Kuzma Samsonov" prev="ii_10" next="ii_11" id="i_12">
					
						<p id="i_12-p1">BUT Dmitri, to whom Grushenka, flying away to a new life, had left
						
						her last greetings, bidding him remember the hour of her love for
						
						ever, knew nothing of what had happened to her, and was at that moment
						
						in a condition of feverish agitation and activity. For the last two
						
						days he had been in such an inconceivable state of mind that he
						
						might easily have fallen ill with brain fever, as he said himself
						
						afterwards. Alyosha had not been able to find him the morning
						
						before, and Ivan had not succeeded in meeting him at the tavern on the
						
						same day. The people at his lodgings, by his orders, concealed his
						
						movements.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p2">He had spent those two days literally rushing in all directions,
						
						"struggling with his destiny and trying to save himself," as he
						
						expressed it himself afterwards, and for some hours he even made a
						
						dash out of the town on urgent business, terrible as it was to him
						
						to lose sight of Grushenka for a moment. All this was explained
						
						afterwards in detail, and confirmed by documentary evidence; but for
						
						the present we will only note the most essential incidents of those
						
						two terrible days immediately preceding the awful catastrophe that
						
						broke so suddenly upon him.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p3">Though Grushenka had, it is true, loved him for an hour, genuinely
						
						and sincerely, yet she tortured him sometimes cruelly and mercilessly.
						
						The worst of it was that he could never tell what she meant to do.
						
						To prevail upon her by force or kindness was also impossible: she
						
						would yield to nothing. She would only have become angry and turned
						
						away from him altogether, he knew that well already. He suspected,
						
						quite correctly, that she, too, was passing through an inward
						
						struggle, and was in a state of extraordinary indecision, that she was
						
						making up her mind to something, and unable to determine upon it.
						
						And so, not without good reason, he divined, with a sinking heart,
						
						that at moments she must simply hate him and his passion. And so,
						
						perhaps, it was, but what was distressing Grushenka he did not
						
						understand. For him the whole tormenting question lay between him
						
						and Fyodor Pavlovitch.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p4">Here, we must note, by the way, one certain fact: he was firmly
						
						persuaded that Fyodor Pavlovitch would offer, or perhaps had
						
						offered, Grushenka lawful wedlock, and did not for a moment believe
						
						that the old voluptuary hoped to gain his object for three thousand
						
						roubles. Mitya had reached this conclusion from his knowledge of
						
						Grushenka and her character. That was how it was that he could believe
						
						at times that all Grushenka's uneasiness rose from not knowing which
						
						of them to choose, which was most to her advantage.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p5">Strange to say, during those days it never occurred to him to
						
						think of the approaching return of the "officer," that is, of the
						
						man who had been such a fatal influence in Grushenka's life, and whose
						
						arrival she was expecting with such emotion and dread. It is true that
						
						of late Grushenka had been very silent about it. Yet he was
						
						perfectly aware of a letter she had received a month ago from her
						
						seducer, and had heard of it from her own lips. He partly knew, too,
						
						what the letter contained. In a moment of spite Grushenka had shown
						
						him that letter, but to her astonishment he attached hardly any
						
						consequence to it. It would be hard to say why this was. Perhaps,
						
						weighed down by all the hideous horror of his struggle with his own
						
						father for this woman, he was incapable of imagining any danger more
						
						terrible, at any rate for the time. He simply did not believe in a
						
						suitor who suddenly turned up again after five years' disappearance,
						
						still less in his speedy arrival. Moreover, in the "officer's" first
						
						letter which had been shown to Mitya, the possibility of his new
						
						rival's visit was very vaguely suggested. The letter was very
						
						indefinite, high-flown, and full of sentimentality. It must be noted
						
						that Grushenka had concealed from him the last lines of the letter, in
						
						which his return was alluded to more definitely. He had, besides,
						
						noticed at that moment, he remembered afterwards, a certain
						
						involuntary proud contempt for this missive from Siberia on
						
						Grushenka's face. Grushenka told him nothing of what had passed
						
						later between her and this rival; so that by degrees he had completely
						
						forgotten the officer's existence.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p6">He felt that whatever might come later, whatever turn things might
						
						take, his final conflict with Fyodor Pavlovitch was close upon him,
						
						and must be decided before anything else. With a sinking heart he
						
						was expecting every moment Grushenka's decision, always believing that
						
						it would come suddenly, on the impulse of the moment. All of a
						
						sudden she would say to him: "Take me, I'm yours for ever," and it
						
						would all be over. He would seize her and bear her away at once to the
						
						ends of the earth. Oh, then he would bear her away at once, as far,
						
						far away as possible; to the farthest end of Russia, if not of the
						
						earth, then he would marry her, and settle down with her incognito, so
						
						that no one would know anything about them, there, here, or
						
						anywhere. Then, oh then, a new life would begin at once!
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p7">Of this different, reformed and "virtuous" life ("it must, it must
						
						be virtuous") he dreamed feverishly at every moment. He thirsted for
						
						that reformation and renewal. The filthy morass, in which he had
						
						sunk of his own free will, was too revolting to him, and, like very
						
						many men in such cases, he put faith above all in change of place.
						
						If only it were not for these people, if only it were not for these
						
						circumstances, if only he could fly away from this accursed place-
						
						he would be altogether regenerated, would enter on a new path. That
						
						was what he believed in, and what he was yearning for.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p8">But all this could only be on condition of the first, the happy
						
						solution of the question. There was another possibility, a different
						
						and awful ending. Suddenly she might say to him: "Go away. I have just
						
						come to terms with Fyodor Pavlovitch. I am going to marry him and
						
						don't want you"- and then... but then... But Mitya did not know what
						
						would happen then. Up to the last hour he didn't know. That must be
						
						said to his credit. He had no definite intentions, had planned no
						
						crime. He was simply watching and spying in agony, while he prepared
						
						himself for the first, happy solution of his destiny. He drove away
						
						any other idea, in fact. But for that ending a quite different anxiety
						
						arose, a new, incidental, but yet fatal and insoluble difficulty
						
						presented itself.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p9">If she were to say to him: "I'm yours; take me away," how could he
						
						take her away? Where had he the means, the money to do it? It was just
						
						at this time that all sources of revenue from Fyodor Pavlovitch, doles
						
						which had gone on without interruption for so many years, ceased.
						
						Grushenka had money, of course, but with regard to this Mitya suddenly
						
						evinced extraordinary pride; he wanted to carry her away and begin the
						
						new life with her himself, at his own expense, not at hers. He could
						
						not conceive of taking her money, and the very idea caused him a
						
						pang of intense repulsion. I won't enlarge on this fact or analyse
						
						it here, but confine myself to remarking that this was his attitude at
						
						the moment. All this may have arisen indirectly and unconsciously from
						
						the secret stings of his conscience for the money of Katerina Ivanovna
						
						that he had dishonestly appropriated. "I've been a scoundrel to one of
						
						them, and I shall be a scoundrel again to the other directly," was his
						
						feeling then, as he explained after: "and when Grushenka knows, she
						
						won't care for such a scoundrel."
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p10">Where then was he to get the means, where was he to get the
						
						fateful money? Without it, all would be lost and nothing could be
						
						done, "and only because I hadn't the money. Oh, the shame of it!"
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p11">To anticipate things: he did, perhaps, know where to get the
						
						money, knew, perhaps, where it lay at that moment. I will say no
						
						more of this here, as it will all be clear later. But his chief
						
						trouble, I must explain however obscurely, lay in the fact that to
						
						have that sum he knew of, to have the right to take it, he must
						
						first restore Katerina Ivanovna's three thousand- if not, "I'm a
						
						common pick-pocket, I'm a scoundrel, and I don't want to begin a new
						
						life as a scoundrel," Mitya decided. And so he made up his mind to
						
						move heaven and earth to return Katerina Ivanovna that three thousand,
						
						and that first of all. The final stage of this decision, so to say,
						
						had been reached only during the last hours, that is, after his last
						
						interview with Alyosha, two days before, on the high-road, on the
						
						evening when Grushenka had insulted Katerina Ivanovna, and Mitya,
						
						after hearing Alyosha's account of it, had admitted that he was a
						
						scoundrel, and told him to tell Katerina Ivanovna so, if it could be
						
						any comfort to her. After parting from his brother on that night, he
						
						had felt in his frenzy that it would be better "to murder and rob
						
						someone than fail to pay my debt to Katya. I'd rather everyone thought
						
						me a robber and a murderer; I'd rather go to Siberia than that Katya
						
						should have the right to say that I deceived her and stole her
						
						money, and used her money to run away with Grushenka and begin a new
						
						life! That I can't do!" So Mitya decided, grinding his teeth, and he
						
						might well fancy at times that his brain would give way. But meanwhile
						
						he went on struggling....
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p12">Strange to say, though one would have supposed there was nothing
						
						left for him but despair- for what chance had he, with nothing in
						
						the world, to raise such a sum?- yet to the very end he persisted in
						
						hoping that he would get that three thousand, that the money would
						
						somehow come to him of itself, as though it might drop from heaven.
						
						That is just how it is with people who, like Dmitri, have never had
						
						anything to do with money, except to squander what has come to them by
						
						inheritance without any effort of their own, and have no notion how
						
						money is obtained. A whirl of the most fantastic notions took
						
						possession of his brain immediately after he had parted with Alyosha
						
						two days before, and threw his thoughts into a tangle of confusion.
						
						This is how it was he pitched first on a perfectly wild enterprise.
						
						And perhaps to men of that kind in such circumstances the most
						
						impossible, fantastic schemes occur first, and seem most practical.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p13">He suddenly determined to go to Samsonov, the merchant who was
						
						Grushenka's protector, and to propose a "scheme" to him, and by
						
						means of it to obtain from him at once the whole of the sum
						
						required. Of the commercial value of his scheme he had no doubt, not
						
						the slightest, and was only uncertain how Samsonov would look upon his
						
						freak, supposing he were to consider it from any but the commercial
						
						point of view. Though Mitya knew the merchant by sight, he was not
						
						acquainted with him and had never spoken a word to him. But for some
						
						unknown reason he had long entertained the conviction that the old
						
						reprobate, who was lying at death's door, would perhaps not at all
						
						object now to Grushenka's securing a respectable position, and
						
						marrying a man "to be depended upon." And he believed not only that he
						
						would not object, but that this was what he desired, and, if
						
						opportunity arose, that he would be ready to help. From some rumour,
						
						or perhaps from some stray word of Grushenka's, he had gathered
						
						further that the old man would perhaps prefer him to Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						for Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p14">Possibly many of the readers of my novel will feel that in
						
						reckoning on such assistance, and being ready to take his bride, so to
						
						speak, from the hands of her protector, Dmitri showed great coarseness
						
						and want of delicacy. I will only observe that Mitya looked upon
						
						Grushenka's past as something completely over. He looked on that
						
						past with infinite pity and resolved with all the fervour of his
						
						passion that when once Grushenka told him she loved him and would
						
						marry him, it would mean the beginning of a new Grushenka and a new
						
						Dmitri, free from every vice. They would forgive one another and would
						
						begin their lives afresh. As for Kuzma Samsonov, Dmitri looked upon
						
						him as a man who had exercised a fateful influence in that remote past
						
						of Grushenka's, though she had never loved him, and who was now
						
						himself a thing of the past, completely done with, and, so to say,
						
						non-existent. Besides, Mitya hardly looked upon him as a man at all,
						
						for it was known to everyone in the town that he was only a
						
						shattered wreck, whose relations with Grushenka had changed their
						
						character and were now simply paternal, and that this had been so
						
						for a long time.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p15">In any case there was much simplicity on Mitya's part in all this,
						
						for in spite of all his vices, he was a very simple-hearted man. It
						
						was an instance of this simplicity that Mitya was seriously
						
						persuaded that, being on the eve of his departure for the next
						
						world, old Kuzma must sincerely repent of his past relations with
						
						Grushenka, and that she had no more devoted friend and protector in
						
						the world than this, now harmless, old man.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p16">After his conversation with Alyosha, at the cross-roads, he hardly
						
						slept all night, and at ten o'clock next morning, he was at the
						
						house of Samsonov and telling the servant to announce him. It was a
						
						very large and gloomy old house of two stories, with a lodge and
						
						outhouses. In the lower story lived Samsonov's two married sons with
						
						their families, his old sister, and his unmarried daughter. In the
						
						lodge lived two of his clerks, one of whom also had a large family.
						
						Both the lodge and the lower story were overcrowded, but the old man
						
						kept the upper floor to himself, and would not even let the daughter
						
						live there with him, though she waited upon him, and in spite of her
						
						asthma was obliged at certain fixed hours, and at any time he might
						
						call her, to run upstairs to him from below.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p17">This upper floor contained a number of large rooms kept purely for
						
						show, furnished in the old-fashioned merchant style, with long
						
						monotonous rows of clumsy mahogany chairs along the walls, with
						
						glass chandeliers under shades, and gloomy mirrors on the walls. All
						
						these rooms were entirely empty and unused, for the old man kept to
						
						one room, a small, remote bedroom, where he was waited upon by an
						
						old servant with a kerchief on her head, and by a lad, who used to sit
						
						on the locker in the passage. Owing to his swollen legs, the old man
						
						could hardly walk at all, and was only rarely lifted from his
						
						leather armchair, when the old woman supporting him led him up and
						
						down the room once or twice. He was morose and taciturn even with this
						
						old woman.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p18">When he was informed of the arrival of the "captain," he at once
						
						refused to see him. But Mitya persisted and sent his name up again.
						
						Samsonov questioned the lad minutely: What he looked like? Whether
						
						he was drunk? Was he going to make a row? The answer he received
						
						was: that he was sober, but wouldn't go away. The old man again
						
						refused to see him. Then Mitya, who had foreseen this, and purposely
						
						brought pencil and paper with him, wrote clearly on the piece of paper
						
						the words: "On most important business closely concerning Agrafena
						
						Alexandrovna," and sent it up to the old man.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p19">After thinking a little Samsonov told the lad to take the
						
						visitor to the drawing-room, and sent the old woman downstairs with
						
						a summons to his younger son to come upstairs to him at once. This
						
						younger son, a man over six foot and of exceptional physical strength,
						
						who was closely-shaven and dressed in the European style, though his
						
						father still wore a kaftan and a beard, came at once without a
						
						comment. All the family trembled before the father. The old man had
						
						sent for this giant, not because he was afraid of the "captain" (he
						
						was by no means of a timorous temper), but in order to have a
						
						witness in case of any emergency. Supported by his son and the servant
						
						lad, he waddled at last into the drawing-room. It may be assumed
						
						that he felt considerable curiosity. The drawing-room in which Mitya
						
						was awaiting him was a vast, dreary room that laid a weight of
						
						depression on the heart. It had a double row of windows, a gallery,
						
						marbled walls, and three immense chandeliers with glass lustres
						
						covered with shades.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p20">Mitya was sitting on a little chair at the entrance, awaiting
						
						his fate with nervous impatience. When the old man appeared at the
						
						opposite door, seventy feet away, Mitya jumped up at once, and with
						
						his long, military stride walked to meet him. Mitya was well
						
						dressed, in a frock-coat, buttoned up, with a round hat and black
						
						gloves in his hands, just as he had been three days before at the
						
						elder's, at the family meeting with his father and brothers. The old
						
						man waited for him, standing dignified and unbending, and Mitya felt
						
						at once that he had looked him through and through as he advanced.
						
						Mitya was greatly impressed, too, with Samsonov's immensely swollen
						
						face. His lower lip, which had always been thick, hung down now,
						
						looking like a bun. He bowed to his guest in dignified silence,
						
						motioned him to a low chair by the sofa, and, leaning on his son's arm
						
						he began lowering himself on to the sofa opposite, groaning painfully,
						
						so that Mitya, seeing his painful exertions, immediately felt
						
						remorseful and sensitively conscious of his insignificance in the
						
						presence of the dignified person he had ventured to disturb.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p21">"What is it you want of me, sir?" said the old man,
						
						deliberately, distinctly, severely, but courteously, when he was at
						
						last seated.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p22">Mitya started, leapt up, but sat down again. Then he began at once
						
						speaking with loud, nervous haste, gesticulating, and in a positive
						
						frenzy. He was unmistakably a man driven into a corner, on the brink
						
						of ruin, catching at the last straw, ready to sink if he failed. Old
						
						Samsonov probably grasped all this in an instant, though his face
						
						remained cold and immovable as a statue's.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p23">"Most honoured sir, Kuzma Kuzmitch, you have no doubt heard more
						
						than once of my disputes with my father, Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						Karamazov, who robbed me of my inheritance from my mother... seeing
						
						the whole town is gossiping about it... for here everyone's
						
						gossiping of what they shouldn't... and besides, it might have reached
						
						you through Grushenka... I beg your pardon, through Agrafena
						
						Alexandrovna... Agrafena Alexandrovna, the lady of whom I have the
						
						highest respect and esteem..."
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p24">So Mitya began, and broke down at the first sentence. We will
						
						not reproduce his speech word for word, but will only summarise the
						
						gist of it. Three months ago, he said, he had of express intention
						
						(Mitya purposely used these words instead of "intentionally")
						
						consulted a lawyer in the chief town of the province, "a distinguished
						
						lawyer, Kuzma Kuzmitch, Pavel Pavlovitch Korneplodov. You have perhaps
						
						heard of him? A man of vast intellect, the mind of a statesman... he
						
						knows you, too... spoke of you in the highest terms..." Mitya broke
						
						down again. But these breaks did not deter him. He leapt instantly
						
						over the gaps, and struggled on and on.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p25">This Korneplodov, after questioning him minutely, and inspecting
						
						the documents he was able to bring him (Mitya alluded somewhat vaguely
						
						to these documents, and slurred over the subject with special
						
						haste), reported that they certainly might take proceedings concerning
						
						the village of Tchermashnya, which ought, he said, to have come to
						
						him, Mitya, from his mother, and so checkmate the old villain, his
						
						father... "because every door was not closed and justice might still
						
						find a loophole." In fact, he might reckon on an additional sum of six
						
						or even seven thousand roubles from Fyodor Pavlovitch, as Tchermashnya
						
						was worth, at least, twenty-five thousand, he might say twenty-eight
						
						thousand, in fact, "thirty, thirty, Kuzma Kuzmitch, and would you
						
						believe it, I didn't get seventeen from that heartless man!" So he,
						
						Mitya, had thrown the business up for the time, knowing nothing
						
						about the law, but on coming here was struck dumb by a cross- claim
						
						made upon him (here Mitya went adrift again and again took a flying
						
						leap forward), "so will not you, excellent and honoured Kuzma
						
						Kuzmitch, be willing to take up all my claims against that unnatural
						
						monster, and pay me a sum down of only three thousand?... You see, you
						
						cannot, in any case, lose over it. On my honour, my honour, I swear
						
						that. Quite the contrary, you may make six or seven thousand instead
						
						of three." Above all, he wanted this concluded that very day.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p26">"I'll do the business with you at a notary's, or whatever it is...
						
						in fact, I'm ready to do anything. .. I'll hand over all the
						
						deeds... whatever you want, sign anything... and we could draw up
						
						the agreement at once... and if it were possible, if it were only
						
						possible, that very morning.... You could pay me that three
						
						thousand, for there isn't a capitalist in this town to compare with
						
						you, and so would save me from... save me, in fact... for a good, I
						
						might say an honourable action.... For I cherish the most honourable
						
						feelings for a certain person, whom you know well, and care for as a
						
						father. I would not have come, indeed, if it had not been as a father.
						
						And, indeed, it's a struggle of three in this business, for it's fate-
						
						that's a fearful thing, Kuzma Kuzmitch! A tragedy, Kuzma Kuzmitch, a
						
						tragedy! And as you've dropped out long ago, it's a tug-of-war between
						
						two. I'm expressing it awkwardly, perhaps, but I'm not a literary man.
						
						You see, I'm on the one side, and that monster on the other. So you
						
						must choose. It's either I or the monster. It all lies in your
						
						hands-.the fate of three lives, and the happiness of two.... Excuse
						
						me, I'm making a mess of it, but you understand... I see from your
						
						venerable eyes that you understand... and if you don't understand, I'm
						
						done for... so you see!"
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p27">Mitya broke off his clumsy speech with that, "so you see!" and
						
						jumping up from his seat, awaited the answer to his foolish
						
						proposal. At the last phrase he had suddenly become hopelessly aware
						
						that it had all fallen flat, above all, that he had been talking utter
						
						nonsense.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p28">"How strange it is! On the way here it seemed all right, and now
						
						it's nothing but nonsense." The idea suddenly dawned on his despairing
						
						mind. All the while he had been talking, the old man sat motionless,
						
						watching him with an icy expression in his eyes. After keeping him for
						
						a moment in suspense, Kuzma Kuzmitch pronounced at last in the most
						
						positive and chilling tone:
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p29">"Excuse me, we don't undertake such business."
						
							Mitya suddenly felt his legs growing weak under him.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p30">"What am I to do now, Kuzma Kuzmitch?" he muttered, with a pale
						
						smile. "I suppose it's all up with me- what do you think?"
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p31">"Excuse me..."
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p32">Mitya remained standing, staring motionless. He suddenly noticed a
						
						movement in the old man's face. He started.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p33">"You see, sir, business of that sort's not in our line," said
						
						the old man slowly. "There's the court, and the lawyers- it's a
						
						perfect misery. But if you like, there is a man here you might apply
						
						to."
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p34">"Good heavens! Who is it? You're my salvation, Kuzma Kuzmitch,"
						
						faltered Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p35">"He doesn't live here, and he's not here just now. He is a
						
						peasant, he does business in timber. His name is Lyagavy. He's been
						
						haggling with Fyodor Pavlovitch for the last year, over your copse
						
						at Tchermashnya. They can't agree on the price, maybe you've heard?
						
						Now he's come back again and is staying with the priest at
						
						Ilyinskoe, about twelve versts from the Volovya station. He wrote to
						
						me, too, about the business of the copse, asking my advice. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch means to go and see him himself. So if you were to be
						
						beforehand with Fyodor Pavlovitch and to make Lyagavy the offer you've
						
						made me, he might possibly- "
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p36">"A brilliant idea!" Mitya interrupted ecstatically. "He's the very
						
						man, it would just suit him. He's haggling with him for it, being
						
						asked too much, and here he would have all the documents entitling him
						
						to the property itself. Ha ha ha!"
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p37">And Mitya suddenly went off into his short, wooden laugh,
						
						startling Samsonov.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p38">"How can I thank you, Kuzma Kuzmitch?" cried Mitya effusively.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p39">"Don't mention it," said Samsonov, inclining his head.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p40">"But you don't know, you've saved me. Oh, it was a true
						
						presentiment brought me to you.... So now to this priest!
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p41">"No need of thanks."
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p42">"I'll make haste and fly there. I'm afraid I've overtaxed your
						
						strength. I shall never forget it. It's a Russian says that, Kuzma
						
						Kuzmitch, a R-r-russian!"
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p43">"To be sure!" Mitya seized his hand to press it, but there was a
						
						malignant gleam in the old man's eye. Mitya drew back his hand, but at
						
						once blamed himself for his mistrustfulness.
						
						</p><p id="i_12-p44">"It's because he's tired," he thought.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p45">"For her sake! For her sake, Kuzma Kuzmitch! You understand that
						
						it's for her," he cried, his voice ringing through the room. He bowed,
						
						turned sharply round, and with the same long stride walked to the door
						
						without looking back. He was trembling with delight.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p46">"Everything was on the verge of ruin and my guardian angel saved
						
						me," was the thought in his mind. And if such a business man as
						
						Samsonov (a most worthy old man, and what dignity!) had suggested this
						
						course, then... then success was assured. He would fly off
						
						immediately. "I will be back before night, I shall be back at night
						
						and the thing is done. Could the old man have been laughing at me?"
						
						exclaimed Mitya, as he strode towards his lodging. He could, of
						
						course, imagine nothing but that the advice was practical "from such a
						
						business man" with an understanding of the business, with an
						
						understanding of this Lyagavy (curious surname!). Or- the old man
						
						was laughing at him.
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p47">Alas! The second alternative was the correct one. Long afterwards,
						
						when the catastrophe had happened, old Samsonov himself confessed,
						
						laughing, that he had made a fool of the "captain." He was a cold,
						
						spiteful and sarcastic man, liable to violent antipathies. Whether
						
						it was the "captain's" excited face, or the foolish conviction of
						
						the "rake and spendthrift," that he, Samsonov, could be taken in by
						
						such a cock-and-bull story as his scheme, or his jealousy of
						
						Grushenka, in whose name this "scapegrace" had rushed in on him with
						
						such a tale to get money which worked on the old man, I can't tell.
						
						But at the instant when Mitya stood before him, feeling his legs
						
						grow weak under him, and frantically exclaiming that he was ruined, at
						
						that moment the old man looked at him with intense spite, and resolved
						
						to make a laughing-stock of him. When Mitya had gone, Kuzma
						
						Kuzmitch, white with rage, turned to his son and bade him see to it
						
						that that beggar be never seen again, and never admitted even into the
						
						yard, or else he'd-
						
							</p><p id="i_12-p48">He did not utter his threat. But even his son, who often saw him
						
						enraged, trembled with fear. For a whole hour afterwards, the old
						
						man was shaking with anger, and by evening he was worse, and sent
						
						for the doctor.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - Lyagavy" prev="i_12" next="iii_10" id="ii_11">
					
					
						<p id="ii_11-p1">SO he must drive at full speed, and he had not the money for
						
						horses. He had forty copecks, and that was all, all that was left
						
						after so many years of prosperity! But he had at home an old silver
						
						watch which had long ceased to go. He snatched it up and carried it to
						
						a Jewish watch maker who had a shop in the market-place. The Jew
						
						gave him six roubles for it.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p2">"And I didn't expect that cried Mitya, ecstatically. (He was still
						
						in a state of ecstasy.) He seized his six roubles and ran home. At
						
						home he borrowed three roubles from the people of the house, who loved
						
						him so much that they were pleased to give it him, though it was all
						
						they had. Mitya in his excitement told them on the spot that his
						
						fate would be decided that day, and he described, in desperate
						
						haste, the whole scheme he had put before Samsonov, the latter's
						
						decision, his own hopes for the future, and so on. These people had
						
						been told many of their lodger's secrets before, and so looked upon
						
						him as a gentleman who was not at all proud, and almost one of
						
						themselves. Having thus collected nine roubles Mitya sent for
						
						posting-horses to take him to the Volovya station. This was how the
						
						fact came to be remembered and established that "at midday, on the day
						
						before the event, Mitya had not a farthing, and that he had sold his
						
						watch to get money and had borrowed three roubles from his landlord,
						
						all in the presence of witnesses."
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p3">I note this fact, later on it will be apparent why I do so.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p4">Though he was radiant with the joyful anticipation that he would
						
						at last solve all his difficulties, yet, as he drew near Volovya
						
						station, he trembled at the thought of what Grushenka might be doing
						
						in his absence. What if she made up her mind to-day to go to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch? This was why he had gone off without telling her and why
						
						he left orders with his landlady not to let out where he had gone,
						
						if anyone came to inquire for him.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p5">"I must, I must get back to-night," he repeated, as he was
						
						jolted along in the cart, "and I dare say I shall have to bring this
						
						Lyagavy back here... to draw up the deed." So mused Mitya, with a
						
						throbbing heart, but alas! his dreams were not fated to be carried
						
						out.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p6">To begin with, he was late, taking a short cut from Volovya
						
						station which turned out to be eighteen versts instead of twelve.
						
						Secondly, he did not find the priest at home at Ilyinskoe; he had gone
						
						off to a neighbouring village. While Mitya, setting off there with the
						
						same exhausted horses, was looking for him, it was almost dark.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p7">The priest, a shy and amiable looking little man, informed him
						
						at once that though Lyagavy had been staying with him at first, he was
						
						now at Suhoy Possyolok, that he was staying the night in the
						
						forester's cottage, as he was buying timber there too. At Mitya's
						
						urgent request that he would take him to Lyagavy at once, and by so
						
						doing "save him, so to speak," the priest agreed, after some demur, to
						
						conduct him to Suhoy Possyolok; his curiosity was obviously aroused.
						
						But, unluckily, he advised their going on foot, as it would not be
						
						"much over" a verst. Mitya, of course, agreed, and marched off with
						
						his yard-long strides, so that the poor priest almost ran after him.
						
						He was a very cautious man, though not old.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p8">Mitya at once began talking to him, too, of his plans, nervously
						
						and excitedly asking advice in regard to Lyagavy, and talking all
						
						the way. The priest listened attentively, but gave little advice. He
						
						turned off Mitya's questions with: "I don't know. Ah, I can't say. How
						
						can I tell?" and so on. When Mitya began to speak of his quarrel
						
						with his father over his inheritance, the priest was positively
						
						alarmed, as he was in some way dependent on Fyodor Pavlovitch. He
						
						inquired, however, with surprise, why he called the peasant-trader
						
						Gorstkin, Lyagavy, and obligingly explained to Mitya that, though
						
						the man's name really was Lyagavy, he was never called so, as he would
						
						be grievously offended at the name, and that he must be sure to call
						
						him Gorstkin, "or you'll do nothing with him; he won't even listen
						
						to you," said the priest in conclusion.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p9">Mitya was somewhat surprised for a moment, and explained that that
						
						was what Samsonov had called him. On hearing this fact, the priest
						
						dropped the subject, though he would have done well to put into
						
						words his doubt whether, if Samsonov had sent him to that peasant,
						
						calling him Lyagavy, there was not something wrong about it and he was
						
						turning him into ridicule. But Mitya had no time to pause over such
						
						trifles. He hurried, striding along, and only when he reached Suhoy
						
						Possyolok did he realise that they had come not one verst, nor one and
						
						a half, but at least three. This annoyed him, but he controlled
						
						himself.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p10">They went into the hut. The forester lived in one half of the hut,
						
						and Gorstkin was lodging in the other, the better room the other
						
						side of the passage. They went into that room and lighted a tallow
						
						candle. The hut was extremely overheated. On the table there was a
						
						samovar that had gone out, a tray with cups, an empty rum bottle, a
						
						bottle of vodka partly full, and some half-eaten crusts of wheaten
						
						bread. The visitor himself lay stretched at full length on the
						
						bench, with his coat crushed up under his head for a pillow, snoring
						
						heavily. Mitya stood in perplexity.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p11">"Of course, I must wake him. My business is too important. I've
						
						come in such haste. I'm in a hurry to get back to-day," he said in
						
						great agitation. But the priest and the forester stood in silence, not
						
						giving their opinion. Mitya went up and began trying to wake him
						
						himself; he tried vigorously, but the sleeper did not wake.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p12">"He's drunk," Mitya decided. "Good Lord! What am I to do? What
						
						am I to do?" And, terribly impatient, he began pulling him by the
						
						arms, by the legs, shaking his head, lifting him up and making him sit
						
						on the bench. Yet, after prolonged exertions, he could only succeed in
						
						getting the drunken man to utter absurd grunts, and violent, but
						
						inarticulate oaths.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p13">"No, you'd better wait a little," the priest pronounced at last,
						
						"for he's obviously not in a fit state."
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p14">"He's been drinking the whole day," the forester chimed in.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p15">"Good heavens!" cried Mitya. "If only you knew how important it is
						
						to me and how desperate I am!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p16">"No, you'd better wait till morning," the priest repeated.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p17">"Till morning? Mercy! that's impossible!" And in his despair he
						
						was on the point of attacking the sleeping man again, but stopped
						
						short at once, realising the uselessness of his efforts. The priest
						
						said nothing, the sleepy forester looked gloomy.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p18">"What terrible tragedies real life contrives for people," said
						
						Mitya, in complete despair. The perspiration was streaming down his
						
						face. The priest seized the moment to put before him, very reasonably,
						
						that, even if he succeeded in wakening the man, he would still be
						
						drunk and incapable of conversation. "And your business is important,"
						
						he said, "so you'd certainly better put it off till morning." With a
						
						gesture of despair Mitya agreed.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p19">"Father, I will stay here with a light, and seize the favourable
						
						moment. As soon as he wakes I'll begin. I'll pay you for the light,"
						
						he said to the forester, "for the night's lodging, too; you'll
						
						remember Dmitri Karamazov. Only Father, I don't know what we're to
						
						do with you. Where will you sleep?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p20">"No, I'm going home. I'll take his horse and get home," he said,
						
						indicating the forester. "And now I'll say good-bye. I wish you all
						
						success."
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p21">So it was settled. The priest rode off on the forester's horse,
						
						delighted to escape, though he shook his head uneasily, wondering
						
						whether he ought not next day to inform his benefactor Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch of this curious incident, "or he may in an unlucky hour
						
						hear of it, be angry, and withdraw his favour."
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p22">The forester, scratching himself, went back to his room without
						
						a word, and Mitya sat on the bench to "catch the favourable moment,"
						
						as he expressed it. Profound dejection clung about his soul like a
						
						heavy mist. A profound, intense dejection! He sat thinking, but
						
						could reach no conclusion. The candle burnt dimly, a cricket
						
						chirped; it became insufferably close in the overheated room. He
						
						suddenly pictured the garden, the path behind the garden, the door
						
						of his father's house mysteriously opening and Grushenka running in.
						
						He leapt up from the bench.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p23">"It's a tragedy!" he said, grinding his teeth. Mechanically he
						
						went up to the sleeping man and looked in his face. He was a lean,
						
						middle-aged peasant, with a very long face, flaxen curls, and a
						
						long, thin, reddish beard, wearing a blue cotton shirt and a black
						
						waistcoat, from the pocket of which peeped the chain of a silver
						
						watch. Mitya looked at his face with intense hatred, and for some
						
						unknown reason his curly hair particularly irritated him.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p24">What was insufferably humiliating was that, after leaving things
						
						of such importance and making such sacrifices, he, Mitya, utterly worn
						
						out, should with business of such urgency be standing over this dolt
						
						on whom his whole fate depended, while he snored as though there
						
						were nothing the matter, as though he'd dropped from another planet.
						
							"Oh, the irony of fate!" cried Mitya, and, quite losing his
						
						head, he fell again to rousing the tipsy peasant. He roused him with a
						
						sort of ferocity, pulled at him, pushed him, even beat him; but
						
						after five minutes of vain exertions, he returned to his bench in
						
						helpless despair, and sat down.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p25">"Stupid! Stupid!" cried Mitya. "And how dishonourable it all
						
						is!" something made him add. His head began to ache horribly.
						
						"Should he fling it up and go away altogether?" he wondered. "No, wait
						
						till to-morrow now. I'll stay on purpose. What else did I come for?
						
						Besides, I've no means of going. How am I to get away from here now?
						
						Oh, the idiocy of it" But his head ached more and more. He sat without
						
						moving, and unconsciously dozed off and fell asleep as he sat. He
						
						seemed to have slept for two hours or more. He was waked up by his
						
						head aching so unbearably that he could have screamed. There was a
						
						hammering in his temples, and the top of his head ached. It was a long
						
						time before he could wake up fully and understand what had happened to
						
						him.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p26">At last he realised that the room was full of charcoal fumes
						
						from the stove, and that he might die of suffocation. And the
						
						drunken peasant still lay snoring. The candle guttered and was about
						
						to go out. Mitya cried out, and ran staggering across the passage into
						
						the forester's room. The forester waked up at once, but hearing that
						
						the other room was full of fumes, to Mitya's surprise and annoyance,
						
						accepted the fact with strange unconcern, though he did go to see to
						
						it.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p27">"But he's dead, he's dead! and... what am I to do then?" cried
						
						Mitya frantically.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p28">They threw open the doors, opened a window and the chimney.
						
						Mitya brought a pail of water from the passage. First he wetted his
						
						own head, then, finding a rag of some sort, dipped it into the
						
						water, and put it on Lyagavy's head. The forester still treated the
						
						matter contemptuously, and when he opened the window said grumpily:
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p29">"It'll be all right, now."
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p30">He went back to sleep, leaving Mitya a lighted lantern. Mitya
						
						fussed about the drunken peasant for half an hour, wetting his head,
						
						and gravely resolved not to sleep all night. But he was so worn out
						
						that when he sat down for a moment to take breath, he closed his eyes,
						
						unconsciously stretched himself full length on the bench and slept
						
						like the dead.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p31">It was dreadfully late when he waked. It was somewhere about
						
						nine o'clock. The sun was shining brightly in the two little windows
						
						of the hut. The curly-headed peasant was sitting on the bench and
						
						had his coat on. He had another samovar and another bottle in front of
						
						him. Yesterday's bottle had already been finished, and the new one was
						
						more than half empty. Mitya jumped up and saw at once that the
						
						cursed peasant was drunk again, hopelessly and incurably. He stared at
						
						him for a moment with wide opened eyes. The peasant was silently and
						
						slyly watching him, with insulting composure, and even a sort of
						
						contemptuous condescension, so Mitya fancied. He rushed up to him.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p32">"Excuse me, you see... I... you've most likely heard from the
						
						forester here in the hut. I'm Lieutenant Dmitri Karamazov, the son
						
						of the old Karamazov whose copse you are buying."
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p33">"That's a lie!" said the peasant, calmly and confidently.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p34">"A lie? You know Fyodor Pavlovitch?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p35">"I don't know any of your Fyodor Pavlovitches," said the
						
						peasant, speaking thickly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p36">"You're bargaining with him for the copse, for the copse. Do
						
						wake up, and collect yourself. Father Pavel of Ilyinskoe brought me
						
						here. You wrote to Samsonov, and he has sent me to you," Mitya
						
						gasped breathlessly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p37">"You're lying!" Lyagavy blurted out again. Mitya's legs went cold.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p38">"For mercy's sake! It isn't a joke! You're drunk, perhaps. Yet you
						
						can speak and understand... or else... I understand nothing!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p39">"You're a painter!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p40">"For mercy's sake! I'm Karamazov, Dmitri Karamazov. I have an
						
						offer to make you, an advantageous offer... very advantageous offer,
						
						concerning the copse!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p41">The peasant stroked his beard importantly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p42">"No, you've contracted for the job and turned out a scamp.
						
						You're a scoundrel!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p43">"I assure you you're mistaken," cried Mitya, wringing his hands in
						
						despair. The peasant still stroked his beard, and suddenly screwed
						
						up his eyes cunningly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p44">"No, you show me this: you tell me the law that allows roguery.
						
						D'you hear? You're a scoundrel! Do you understand that?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p45">Mitya stepped back gloomily, and suddenly "something seemed to hit
						
						him on the head," as he said afterwards. In an instant a light
						
						seemed to dawn in his mind, "a light was kindled and I grasped it
						
						all." He stood, stupefied, wondering how he, after all a man of
						
						intelligence, could have yielded to such folly, have been led into
						
						such an adventure, and have kept it up for almost twenty-four hours,
						
						fussing round this Lyagavy, wetting his head.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p46">"Why, the man's drunk, dead drunk, and he'll go on drinking now
						
						for a week; what's the use of waiting here? And what if Samsonov
						
						sent me here on purpose? What if she- ? Oh God, what have I done?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p47">The peasant sat watching him and grinning. Another time Mitya
						
						might have killed the fool in a fury, but now he felt as weak as a
						
						child. He went quietly to the bench, took up his overcoat, put it on
						
						without a word, and went out of the hut. He did not find the
						
						forester in the next room; there was no one there. He took fifty
						
						copecks in small change out of his pocket and put them on the table
						
						for his night's lodging, the candle, and the trouble he had given.
						
						Coming out of the hut he saw nothing but forest all round. He walked
						
						at hazard, not knowing which way to turn out of the hut, to the
						
						right or to the left. Hurrying there the evening before with the
						
						priest, he had not noticed the road. He had no revengeful feeling
						
						for anybody, even for Samsonov, in his heart. He strode along a narrow
						
						forest path, aimless, dazed, without heeding where he was going. A
						
						child could have knocked him down, so weak was he in body and soul. He
						
						got out of the forest somehow, however, and a vista of fields, bare
						
						after the harvest, stretched as far as the eye could see.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p48">"What despair! What death all round!" he repeated, striding on and
						
						on.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p49">He was saved by meeting an old merchant who was being driven
						
						across country in a hired trap. When he overtook him, Mitya asked
						
						the way and it turned out that the old merchant, too, was going to
						
						Volovya. After some discussion Mitya got into the trap. Three hours
						
						later they arrived. At Volovya, Mitya at once ordered posting-horses
						
						to drive to the town, and suddenly realised that he was appallingly
						
						hungry. While the horses were being harnessed, an omelette was
						
						prepared for him. He ate it all in an instant, ate a huge hunk of
						
						bread, ate a sausage, and swallowed three glasses of vodka. After
						
						eating, his spirits and his heart grew lighter. He flew towards the
						
						town, urged on the driver, and suddenly made a new and "unalterable"
						
						plan to procure that "accursed money" before evening. "And to think,
						
						only to think that a man's life should be ruined for the sake of
						
						that paltry three thousand!" he cried, contemptuously. "I'll settle it
						
						to-day." And if it had not been for the thought of Grushenka and of
						
						what might have happened to her, which never left him, he would
						
						perhaps have become quite cheerful again.... But the thought of her
						
						was stabbing him to the heart every moment, like a sharp knife.
						
							</p><p id="ii_11-p50">At last they arrived, and Mitya at once ran to Grushenka.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - Gold Mines" prev="ii_11" next="iv_6" id="iii_10">
					
					
						<p id="iii_10-p1">THIS was the visit of Mitya of which Grushenka had spoken to
							
							Rakitin with such horror. She was just then expecting the "message,"
							
							and was much relieved that Mitya had not been to see her that day or
							
							the day before. She hoped that "please God he won't come till I'm gone
							
							away," and he suddenly burst in on her. The rest we know already. To
							
							get him off her hands she suggested at once that he should walk with
							
							her to Samsonov's, where she said she absolutely must go "to settle
							
							his accounts," and when Mitya accompanied her at once, she said
							
							good-bye to him at the gate, making him promise to come at twelve
							
							o'clock to take her home again. Mitya, too, was delighted at this
							
							arrangement. If she was sitting at Samsonov's she could not be going
							
							to Fyodor Pavlovitch's, "if only she's not lying," he added at once.
							
							But he thought she was not lying from what he saw.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p2">He was that sort of jealous man who, in the absence of the beloved
							
							woman, at once invents all sorts of awful fancies of what may be
							
							happening to her, and how she may be betraying him, but, when
							
							shaken, heartbroken, convinced of her faithlessness, he runs back to
							
							her, at the first glance at her face, her gay, laughing,
							
							affectionate face, he revives at once, lays aside all suspicion and
							
							with joyful shame abuses himself for his jealousy.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p3">After leaving Grushenka at the gate he rushed home. Oh, he had
							
							so much still to do that day! But a load had been lifted from his
							
							heart, anyway.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p4">"Now I must only make haste and find out from Smerdyakov whether
							
							anything happened there last night, whether, by any chance, she went
							
							to Fyodor Pavlovitch; ough!" floated through his mind.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p5">Before he had time to reach his lodging, jealousy had surged up
							
							again in his restless heart.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p6">Jealousy! "Othello was not jealous, he was trustful," observed
							
							Pushkin. And that remark alone is enough to show the deep insight of
							
							our great poet. Othello's soul was shattered and his whole outlook
							
							clouded simply because his ideal was destroyed. But Othello did not
							
							begin hiding, spying, peeping. He was trustful, on the contrary. He
							
							had to be led up, pushed on, excited with great difficulty before he
							
							could entertain the idea of deceit. The truly jealous man is not
							
							like that. It is impossible to picture to oneself the shame and
							
							moral degradation to which the jealous man can descend without a qualm
							
							of conscience. And yet it's not as though the jealous were all
							
							vulgar and base souls. On the contrary, a man of lofty feelings, whose
							
							love is pure and full of self-sacrifice, may yet hide under tables,
							
							bribe the vilest people, and be familiar with the lowest ignominy of
							
							spying and eavesdropping.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p7">Othello was incapable of making up his mind to faithlessness-
							
							not incapable of forgiving it, but of making up his mind to it- though
							
							his soul was as innocent and free from malice as a babe's. It is not
							
							so with the really jealous man. It is hard to imagine what some
							
							jealous men can make up their mind to and overlook, and what they
							
							can forgive! The jealous are the readiest of all to forgive, and all
							
							women know it. The jealous man can forgive extraordinarily quickly
							
							(though, of course, after a violent scene), and he is able to
							
							forgive infidelity almost conclusively proved, the very kisses and
							
							embraces he has seen, if only he can somehow be convinced that it
							
							has all been "for the last time," and that his rival will vanish
							
							from that day forward, will depart to the ends of the earth, or that
							
							he himself will carry her away somewhere, where that dreaded rival
							
							will not get near her. Of course the reconciliation is only for an
							
							hour. For, even if the rival did disappear next day, he would invent
							
							another one and would be jealous of him. And one might wonder what
							
							there was in a love that had to be so watched over, what a love
							
							could be worth that needed such strenuous guarding. But that the
							
							jealous will never understand. And yet among them are men of noble
							
							hearts. It is remarkable, too, that those very men of noble hearts,
							
							standing hidden in some cupboard, listening and spying, never feel the
							
							stings of conscience at that moment, anyway, though they understand
							
							clearly enough with their "noble hearts" the shameful depths to
							
							which they have voluntarily sunk.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p8">At the sight of Grushenka, Mitya's jealousy vanished, and, for
							
							an instant he became trustful and generous, and positively despised
							
							himself for his evil feelings. But it only proved that, in his love
							
							for the woman, there was an element of something far higher than he
							
							himself imagined, that it was not only a sensual passion, not only the
							
							"curve of her body," of which he had talked to Alyosha. But, as soon
							
							as Grushenka had gone, Mitya began to suspect her of all the low
							
							cunning of faithlessness, and he felt no sting of conscience at it.
							
								And so jealousy surged up in him again. He had, in any case, to
							
							make haste. The first thing to be done was to get hold of at least a
							
							small, temporary loan of money. The nine roubles had almost all gone
							
							on his expedition. And, as we all know, one can't take a step
							
							without money. But he had thought over in the cart where he could
							
							get a loan. He had a brace of fine duelling pistols in a case, which
							
							he had not pawned till then because he prized them above all his
							
							possessions.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p9">In the Metropolis tavern he had some time since made
							
							acquaintance with a young official and had learnt that this very
							
							opulent bachelor was passionately fond of weapons. He used to buy
							
							pistols, revolvers, daggers, hang them on his wall and show them to
							
							acquaintances. He prided himself on them, and was quite a specialist
							
							on the mechanism of the revolver. Mitya, without stopping to think,
							
							went straight to him, and offered to pawn his pistols to him for ten
							
							roubles. The official, delighted, began trying to persuade him to sell
							
							them outright. But Mitya would not consent, so the young man gave
							
							him ten roubles, protesting that nothing would induce him to take
							
							interest. They parted friends.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p10">Mitya was in haste; he rushed towards Fyodor Pavlovitch's by the
							
							back way, to his arbour, to get hold of Smerdyakov as soon as
							
							possible. In this way the fact was established that three or four
							
							hours before a certain event, of which I shall speak later on, Mitya
							
							had not a farthing, and pawned for ten roubles a possession he valued,
							
							though, three hours later, he was in possession of thousands.... But I
							
							am anticipating. From Marya Kondratyevna (the woman living near Fyodor
							
							Pavlovitch's) he learned the very disturbing fact of Smerdyakov's
							
							illness. He heard the story of his fall in the cellar, his fit, the
							
							doctor's visit, Fyodor Pavlovitch's anxiety; he heard with interest,
							
							too, that his brother Ivan had set off that morning for Moscow.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p11">"Then he must have driven through Volovya before me," thought
							
							Dmitri, but he was terribly distressed about Smerdyakov. "What will
							
							happen now? Who'll keep watch for me? Who'll bring me word?" he
							
							thought. He began greedily questioning the women whether they had seen
							
							anything the evening before. They quite understood what he was
							
							trying to find out, and completely reassured him. No one had been
							
							there. Ivan Fyodorovitch had been there that night; everything had
							
							been perfectly as usual. Mitya grew thoughtful. He would certainly
							
							have to keep watch to-day, but where? Here or at Samsonov's gate? He
							
							decided that he must be on the lookout both here and there, and
							
							meanwhile... meanwhile... The difficulty was that he had to carry
							
							out the new plan that he had made on the journey back. He was sure
							
							of its success, but he must not delay acting upon it. Mitya resolved
							
							to sacrifice an hour to it: "In an hour I shall know everything, I
							
							shall settle everything, and then, then, then, first of all to
							
							Samsonov's. I'll inquire whether Grushenka's there and instantly be
							
							back here again, stay till eleven, and then to Samsonov's again to
							
							bring her home." This was what he decided.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p12">He flew home, washed, combed his hair, brushed his clothes,
							
							dressed, and went to Madame Hohlakov's. Alas! he had built his hopes
							
							on her. He had resolved to borrow three thousand from that lady. And
							
							what was more, he felt suddenly convinced that she would not refuse to
							
							lend it to him. It may be wondered why, if he felt so certain, he
							
							had not gone to her at first, one of his own sort, so to speak,
							
							instead of to Samsonov, a man he did not know, who was not of his
							
							own class, and to whom he hardly knew how to speak.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p13">But the fact was that he had never known Madame Hohlakov well, and
							
							had seen nothing of her for the last month, and that he knew she could
							
							not endure him. She had detested him from the first because he was
							
							engaged to Katerina Ivanovna, while she had, for some reason, suddenly
							
							conceived the desire that Katerina Ivanovna should throw him over, and
							
							marry the "charming, chivalrously refined Ivan, who had such excellent
							
							manners." Mitya's manners she detested. Mitya positively laughed at
							
							her, and had once said about her that she was just as lively and at
							
							her ease as she was uncultivated. But that morning in the cart a
							
							brilliant idea had struck him: "If she is so anxious I should not
							
							marry Katerina Ivanovna" (and he knew she was positively hysterical
							
							upon the subject) "why should she refuse me now that three thousand,
							
							just to enable me to leave Katya and get away from her for ever. These
							
							spoilt fine ladies, if they set their hearts on anything, will spare
							
							no expense to satisfy their caprice. Besides, she's so rich," Mitya
							
							argued.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p14">As for his "plan" it was just the same as before; it consisted
							
							of the offer of his rights to Tchermashnya- but not with a
							
							commercial object, as it had been with Samsonov, not trying to
							
							allure the lady with the possibility of making a profit of six or
							
							seven thousand- but simply as a security for the debt. As he worked
							
							out this new idea, Mitya was enchanted with it, but so it always was
							
							with him in all his undertakings, in all his sudden decisions. He gave
							
							himself up to every new idea with passionate enthusiasm. Yet, when
							
							he mounted the steps of Madame Hohlakov's house he felt a shiver of
							
							fear run down his spine. At that moment he saw fully, as a
							
							mathematical certainty, that this was his last hope, that if this
							
							broke down, nothing else was left him in the world but to "rob and
							
							murder someone for the three thousand." It was half-past seven when he
							
							rang at the bell.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p15">At first fortune seemed to smile upon him. As soon as he was
							
							announced he was received with extraordinary rapidity. "As though
							
							she were waiting for me," thought Mitya, and as soon as he had been
							
							led to the drawing-room, the lady of the house herself ran in, and
							
							declared at once that she was expecting him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p16">"I was expecting you! I was expecting you! Though I'd no reason to
							
							suppose you would come to see me, as you will admit yourself. Yet, I
							
							did expect you. You may marvel at my instinct, Dmitri Fyodorovitch,
							
							but I was convinced all the morning that you would come."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p17">"That is certainly wonderful, madam," observed Mitya, sitting down
							
							limply, "but I have come to you on a matter of great importance.... On
							
							a matter of supreme importance for me, that is, madam... for me
							
							alone... and I hasten- "
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p18">"I know you've come on most important business. Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch; it's not a case of presentiment, no reactionary
							
							harking back to the miraculous (have you heard about Father Zossima?).
							
							This is a case of mathematics: you couldn't help coming, after all
							
							that has passed with Katerina Ivanovna; you couldn't, you couldn't,
							
							that's a mathematical certainty."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p19">"The realism of actual life, madam, that's what it is. But allow
							
							me to explain-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p20">"Realism indeed, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. I'm all for realism now.
							
							I've seen too much of miracles. You've heard that Father Zossima is
							
							dead?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p21">"No, madam, it's the first time I've heard of it." Mitya was a
							
							little surprised. The image of Alyosha rose to his mind.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p22">"Last night, and only imagine-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p23">"Madam," said Mitya, "I can imagine nothing except that I'm in a
							
							desperate position, and that if you don't help me, everything will
							
							come to grief, and I first of all. Excuse me for the triviality of the
							
							expression, but I'm in a fever-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p24">"I know, I know that you're in a fever. You could hardly fail to
							
							be, and whatever you may say to me, I know beforehand. I have long
							
							been thinking over your destiny, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, I am watching
							
							over it and studying it.... Oh, believe me, I'm an experienced
							
							doctor of the soul, Dmitri Fyodorovitch."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p25">"Madam, if you are an experienced doctor, I'm certainly an
							
							experienced patient," said Mitya, with an effort to be polite, "and
							
							I feel that if you are watching over my destiny in this way, you
							
							will come to my help in my ruin, and so allow me, at least to
							
							explain to you the plan with which I have ventured to come to you...
							
							and what I am hoping of you.... I have come, madam-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p26">"Don't explain it. It's of secondary importance. But as for
							
							help, you're not the first I have helped, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. You
							
							have most likely heard of my cousin, Madame Belmesov. Her husband
							
							was ruined, 'had come to grief,' as you characteristically express it,
							
							Dmitri Fyodorovitch. I recommended him to take to horse-breeding,
							
							and now he's doing well. Have you any idea of horse-breeding, Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p27">"Not the faintest, madam; ah, madam, not the faintest!" cried
							
							Mitya, in nervous impatience, positively starting from his seat. "I
							
							simply implore you, madam, to listen to me. Only give me two minutes
							
							of free speech that I may just explain to you everything, the whole
							
							plan with which I have come. Besides, I am short of time. I'm in a
							
							fearful hurry," Mitya cried hysterically, feeling that she was just
							
							going to begin talking again, and hoping to cut her short. "I have
							
							come in despair... in the last gasp of despair, to beg you to lend
							
							me the sum of three thousand, a loan, but on safe, most safe security,
							
							madam, with the most trustworthy guarantees! Only let me explain-"
							
								"You must tell me all that afterwards, afterwards!" Madame
							
							Hohlakov with a gesture demanded silence in her turn, "and whatever
							
							you may tell me, I know it all beforehand; I've told you so already.
							
							You ask for a certain sum, for three thousand, but I can give you
							
							more, immeasurably more; I will save you, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, but you
							
							must listen to me."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p28">Mitya started from his seat again.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p29">"Madam, will you really be so good!" he cried, with strong
							
							feeling. "Good God, you've saved me! You have saved a man from a
							
							violent death, from a bullet.... My eternal gratitude "I will give you
							
							more, infinitely more than three thousand!" cried Madame Hohlakov,
							
							looking with a radiant smile at Mitya's ecstasy.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p30">"Infinitely? But I don't need so much. I only need that fatal
							
							three thousand, and on my part I can give security for that sum with
							
							infinite gratitude, and I propose a plan which-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p31">"Enough, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, it's said and done." Madame Hohlakov
							
							cut him short, with the modest triumph of beneficence. "I have
							
							promised to save you, and I will save you. I will save you as I did
							
							Belmesov. What do you think of the gold mines, Dmitri Fyodorovitch?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p32">"Of the gold mines, madam? I have never thought anything about
							
							them."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p33">"But I have thought of them for you. Thought of them over and over
							
							again. I have been watching you for the last month. I've watched you a
							
							hundred times as you've walked past, saying to myself: That's a man of
							
							energy who ought to be at the gold mines. I've studied your gait and
							
							come to the conclusion: that's a man who would find gold."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p34">"From my gait, madam?" said Mitya, smiling.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p35">"Yes, from your gait. You surely don't deny that character can
							
							be told from the gait, Dmitri Fyodorovitch? Science supports the idea.
							
							I'm all for science and realism now. After all this business with
							
							Father Zossima, which has so upset me, from this very day I'm a
							
							realist and I want to devote myself to practical usefulness. I'm
							
							cured. 'Enough!' as Turgeney says."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p36">"But madam, the three thousand you so generously promised to
							
							lend me-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p37">"It is yours, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," Madame Hohlakov cut in at
							
							once. "The money is as good as in your pocket, not three thousand, but
							
							three million, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, in less than no time. I'll make
							
							you a present of the idea: you shall find gold mines, make millions,
							
							return and become a leading man, and wake us up and lead us to
							
							better things. Are we to leave it all to the Jews? You will found
							
							institutions and enterprises of all sorts. You will help the poor, and
							
							they will bless you. This is the age of railways, Dmitri Fyodorovitch.
							
							You'll become famous and indispensable to the Department of Finance,
							
							which is so badly off at present. The depreciation of the rouble keeps
							
							me awake at night, Dmitri Fyodorovitch; people don't know that side of
							
							me-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p38">"Madam, madam! Dmitri interrupted with an uneasy presentiment.
							
							"I shall indeed, perhaps, follow your advice, your wise advice,
							
							madam.... I shall perhaps set off... to the gold mines.... I'll come
							
							and see you again about it... many times, indeed... but now, that
							
							three thousand you so generously... oh, that would set me free, and if
							
							you could to-day... you see, I haven't a minute, a minute to lose
							
							to-day-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p39">"Enough, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, enough!" Madame Hohlakov interrupted
							
							emphatically. "The question is, will you go to the gold mines or
							
							not; have you quite made up your mind? Answer yes or no."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p40">"I will go, madam, afterwards.... I'll go where you like... but
							
							now-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p41">"Wait!" cried Madame Hohlakov. And jumping up and running to a
							
							handsome bureau with numerous little drawers, she began pulling out
							
							one drawer after another, looking for something with desperate haste.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p42">"The three thousand," thought Mitya, his heart almost stopping,
							
							"and at the instant... without any papers or formalities... that's
							
							doing things in gentlemanly style! She's a splendid woman, if only she
							
							didn't talk so much!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p43">"Here!" cried Madame Hohlakov, running back joyfully to Mitya,
							
							"here is what I was looking for!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p44">It was a tiny silver ikon on a cord, such as is sometimes worn
							
							next the skin with a cross.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p45">"This is from Kiev, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," she went on
							
							reverently, "from the relics of the Holy Martyr, Varvara. Let me put
							
							it on your neck myself, and with it dedicate you to a new life, to a
							
							new career."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p46">And she actually put the cord round his neck, and began
							
							arranging it. In extreme embarrassment, Mitya bent down and helped
							
							her, and at last he got it under his neck-tie and collar through his
							
							shirt to his chest.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p47">"Now you can set off," Madame Hohlakov pronounced, sitting down
							
							triumphantly in her place again.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p48">"Madam, I am so touched. I don't know how to thank you,
							
							indeed... for such kindness, but... If only you knew how precious time
							
							is to me.... That sum of money, for which I shall be indebted to
							
							your generosity... Oh, madam, since you are so kind, so touchingly
							
							generous to me," Mitya exclaimed impulsively, "then let me reveal to
							
							you... though, of course, you've known it a long time... that I love
							
							somebody here.... I have been false to Katya... Katerina Ivanovna I
							
							should say.... Oh, I've behaved inhumanly, dishonourably to her, but I
							
							fell in love here with another woman... a woman whom you, madam,
							
							perhaps, despise, for you know everything already, but whom I cannot
							
							leave on any account, and therefore that three thousand now-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p49">"Leave everything, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," Madame Hohlakov
							
							interrupted in the most decisive tone. "Leave everything, especially
							
							women. Gold mines are your goal, and there's no place for women there.
							
							Afterwards, when you come back rich and famous, you will find the girl
							
							of your heart in the highest society. That will be a modern girl, a
							
							girl of education and advanced ideas. By that time the dawning woman
							
							question will have gained ground, and the new woman will have
							
							appeared."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p50">"Madam, that's not the point, not at all.... Mitya clasped his
							
							hands in entreaty.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p51">"Yes it is, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, just what you need; the very
							
							thing you're yearning for, though you don't realise it yourself. I
							
							am not at all opposed to the present woman movement, Dmitri
							
							Fyodorovitch. The development of woman, and even the political
							
							emancipation of woman in the near future- that's my ideal. I've a
							
							daughter myself, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, people don't know that side of
							
							me. I wrote a letter to the author, Shtchedrin, on that subject. He
							
							has taught me so much, so much about the vocation of woman. So last
							
							year I sent him an anonymous letter of two lines: 'I kiss and
							
							embrace you, my teacher, for the modern woman. Persevere.' And I
							
							signed myself, 'A Mother.' I thought of signing myself 'A contemporary
							
							Mother,' and hesitated, but I stuck to the simple 'Mother'; there's
							
							more moral beauty in that, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. And the word
							
							'contemporary' might have reminded him of The Contemporary- a
							
							painful recollection owing to the censorship.... Good Heavens, what is
							
							the matter!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p52">"Madam!" cried Mitya, jumping up at last, clasping his hands
							
							before her in helpless entreaty. "You will make me weep if you delay
							
							what you have so generously-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p53">"Oh, do weep, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, do weep! That's a noble
							
							feeling... such a path lies open before you! Tears will ease your
							
							heart, and later on you will return rejoicing. You will hasten to me
							
							from Siberia on purpose to share your joy with me-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p54">"But allow me, too!" Mitya cried suddenly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p55">"For the last time I entreat you, tell me, can I have the sum
							
							you promised me to-day, if not, when may I come for it?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p56">"What sum, Dmitri Fyodorovitch?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p57">"The three thousand you promised me... that you so generously-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p58">"Three thousand? Roubles? Oh, no, I haven't got three thousand,"
							
							Madame Hohlakov announced with serene amazement. Mitya was stupefied.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p59">"Why, you said just now you said... you said it was as good as
							
							in my hands-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p60">"Oh, no, you misunderstood me, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. In that case
							
							you misunderstood me. I was talking of the gold mines. It's true I
							
							promised you more, infinitely more than three thousand, I remember
							
							it all now, but I was referring to the gold mines."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p61">"But the money? The three thousand?" Mitya exclaimed, awkwardly.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p62">"Oh, if you meant money, I haven't any. I haven't a penny,
							
							Dmitri Fyodorovitch. I'm quarrelling with my steward about it, and
							
							I've just borrowed five hundred roubles from Miusov, myself. No, no,
							
							I've no money. And, do you know, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, if I had, I
							
							wouldn't give it to you. In the first place I never lend money.
							
							Lending money means losing friends. And I wouldn't give it to you
							
							particularly. I wouldn't give it you, because I like you and want to
							
							save you, for all you need is the gold mines, the gold mines, the gold
							
							mines!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p63">"Oh, the devil!" roared Mitya, and with all his might brought
							
							his fist down on the table.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p64">"Aie! Aie!" cried Madame Hohlakov, alarmed, and she flew to the
							
							other end of the drawing-room.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p65">Mitya spat on the ground, and strode rapidly out of the room,
							
							out of the house, into the street, into the darkness! He walked like
							
							one possessed, and beating himself on the breast, on the spot where he
							
							had struck himself two days previously, before Alyosha, the last
							
							time he saw him in the dark, on the road. What those blows upon his
							
							breast signified, on that spot, and what he meant by it- that was, for
							
							the time, a secret which was known to no one in the world, and had not
							
							been told even to Alyosha. But that secret meant for him more than
							
							disgrace; it meant ruin, suicide. So he had determined, if he did
							
							not get hold of the three thousand that would pay his debt to Katerina
							
							Ivanovna, and so remove from his breast, from that spot on his breast,
							
							the shame he carried upon it, that weighed on his conscience. All this
							
							will be fully explained to the reader later on, but now that his
							
							last hope had vanished, this man, so strong in appearance, burst out
							
							crying like a little child a few steps from the Hohlakovs' house. He
							
							walked on, and not knowing what he was doing, wiped away his tears
							
							with his fist. In this way he reached the square, and suddenly
							
							became aware that he had stumbled against something. He heard a
							
							piercing wail from an old woman whom he had almost knocked down.
							
								"</p><p id="iii_10-p66">Good Lord, you've nearly killed me! Why don't you look where
							
							you're going, scapegrace?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p67">"Why, it's you!" cried Mitya, recognising the old woman in the
							
							dark. It was the old servant who waited on Samsonov, whom Mitya had
							
							particularly noticed the day before.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p68">"And who are you, my good sir?" said the old woman in quite a
							
							different voice. "I don't know you in the dark."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p69">"You live at Kuzma Kuzmitch's. You're the servant there?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p70">"Just so, sir, I was only running out to Prohoritch's... But I
							
							don't know you now."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p71">"Tell me, my good woman, is Agrafena Alexandrovna there now?" said
							
							Mitya, beside himself with suspense. "I saw her to the house some time
							
							ago."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p72">"She has been there, sir. She stayed a little while, and went
							
							off again."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p73">"What? Went away?" cried Mitya. "When did she go?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p74">"Why, as soon as she came. She only stayed a minute. She only told
							
							Kuzma Kuzmitch a tale that made him laugh, and then she ran away."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p75">"You're lying, damn you!" roared Mitya.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p76">"Aie! Aie!" shrieked the old woman, but Mitya had vanished.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p77">He ran with all his might to the house where Grushenka lived. At
							
							the moment he reached it, Grushenka was on her way to Mokroe. It was
							
							not more than a quarter of an hour after her departure.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p78">Fenya was sitting with her grandmother, the old cook, Matryona, in
							
							the kitchen when "the captain" ran in. Fenya uttered a piercing shriek
							
							on seeing him.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p79">"You scream?" roared Mitya, "where is she?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p80">But without giving the terror-stricken Fenya time to utter a word,
							
							he fell all of a heap at her feet.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p81">"Fenya, for Christ's sake, tell me, where is she?"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p82">"I don't know. Dmitri Fyodorovitch, my dear, I don't know. You may
							
							kill me but I can't tell you." Fenya swore and protested. "You went
							
							out with her yourself not long ago-"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p83">"She came back!"
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p84">"Indeed she didn't. By God I swear she didn't come back."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p85">"You're lying!" shouted Mitya. "From your terror I know where
							
							she is."
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p86">He rushed away. Fenya in her fright was glad she had got off so
							
							easily. But she knew very well that it was only that he was in such
							
							haste, or she might not have fared so well. But as he ran, he
							
							surprised both Fenya and old Matryona by an unexpected action. On
							
							the table stood a brass mortar, with a pestle in it, a small brass
							
							pestle, not much more than six inches long. Mitya already had opened
							
							the door with one hand when, with the other, he snatched up the
							
							pestle, and thrust it in his side-pocket.
							
								</p><p id="iii_10-p87">"Oh Lord! He's going to murder someone!" cried Fenya, flinging
							
							up her hands.</p>
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - In the Dark" prev="iii_10" next="v_5" id="iv_6">
					
						<p id="iv_6-p1">WHERE was he running? "Where could she be except at Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's? She must have run straight to him from Samsonov's,
						
						that was clear now. The whole intrigue, the whole deceit was
						
						evident."... It all rushed whirling through his mind. He did not run
						
						to Marya Kondratyevna's. "There was no need to go there... not the
						
						slightest need... he must raise no alarm... they would run and tell
						
						directly.... Marya Kondratyevna was clearly in the plot, Smerdyakov
						
						too, he too, all had been bought over!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p2">He formed another plan of action: he ran a long way round Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's house, crossing the lane, running down Dmitrovsky Street,
						
						then over the little bridge, and so came straight to the deserted
						
						alley at the back, which was empty and uninhabited, with, on one
						
						side the hurdle fence of a neighbour's kitchen-garden, on the other
						
						the strong high fence that ran all round Fyodor Pavlovitch's garden.
						
						Here he chose a spot, apparently the very place, where according to
						
						the tradition, he knew Lizaveta had once climbed over it: "If she
						
						could climb over it," the thought, God knows why, occurred to him,
						
						"surely I can." He did in fact jump up, and instantly contrived to
						
						catch hold of the top of the fence. Then he vigorously pulled
						
						himself up and sat astride on it. Close by, in the garden stood the
						
						bathhouse, but from the fence he could see the lighted windows of
						
						the house too.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p3">"Yes, the old man's bedroom is lighted up. She's there! and he
						
						leapt from the fence into the garden. Though he knew Grigory was ill
						
						and very likely Smerdyakov, too, and that there was no one to hear
						
						him, he instinctively hid himself, stood still, and began to listen.
						
						But there was dead silence on all sides and, as though of design,
						
						complete stillness, not the slightest breath of wind.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p4">"And naught but the whispering silence," the line for some
						
						reason rose to his mind. "If only no one heard me jump over the fence!
						
						I think not." Standing still for a minute, he walked softly over the
						
						grass in the garden, avoiding the trees and shrubs. He walked
						
						slowly, creeping stealthily at every step, listening to his own
						
						footsteps. It took him five minutes to reach the lighted window. He
						
						remembered that just under the window there were several thick and
						
						high bushes of elder and whitebeam. The door from the house into the
						
						garden on the left-hand side was shut; he had carefully looked on
						
						purpose to see, in passing. At last he reached the bushes and hid
						
						behind them. He held his breath. "I must wait now," he thought, "to
						
						reassure them, in case they heard my footsteps and are listening... if
						
						only I don't cough or sneeze."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p5">He waited two minutes. His heart was beating violently, and, at
						
						moments, he could scarcely breathe. "No, this throbbing at my heart
						
						won't stop," he thought. "I can't wait any longer." He was standing
						
						behind a bush in the shadow. The light of the window fell on the front
						
						part of the bush.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p6">"How red the whitebeam berries are!" he murmured, not knowing why.
						
						Softly and noiselessly, step by step, he approached the window, and
						
						raised himself on tiptoe. All Fyodor Pavlovitch's bedroom lay open
						
						before him. It was not a large room, and was divided in two parts by a
						
						red screen, "Chinese," as Fyodor Pavlovitch used to call it. The
						
						word "Chinese" flashed into Mitya's mind, "and behind the screen, is
						
						Grushenka," thought Mitya. He began watching Fyodor Pavlovitch who was
						
						wearing his new striped-silk dressing-gown, which Mitya had never
						
						seen, and a silk cord with tassels round the waist. A clean, dandified
						
						shirt of fine linen with gold studs peeped out under the collar of the
						
						dressing-gown. On his head Fyodor Pavlovitch had the same red
						
						bandage which Alyosha had seen.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p7">"He has got himself up," thought Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p8">His father was standing near the window, apparently lost in
						
						thought. Suddenly he jerked up his head, listened a moment, and
						
						hearing nothing went up to the table, poured out half a glass of
						
						brandy from a decanter and drank it off. Then he uttered a deep
						
						sigh, again stood still a moment, walked carelessly up to the
						
						looking-glass on the wall, with his right hand raised the red
						
						bandage on his forehead a little, and began examining his bruises
						
						and scars, which had not yet disappeared.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p9">"He's alone," thought Mitya, "in all probability he's alone."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p10">Fyodor Pavlovitch moved away from the looking-glass, turned
						
						suddenly to the window and looked out. Mitya instantly slipped away
						
						into the shadow.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p11">"She may be there behind the screen. Perhaps she's asleep by now,"
						
						he thought, with a pang at his heart. Fyodor Pavlovitch moved away
						
						from the window. "He's looking for her out of the window, so she's not
						
						there. Why should he stare out into the dark? He's wild with
						
						impatience."... Mitya slipped back at once, and fell to gazing in at
						
						the window again. The old man was sitting down at the table,
						
						apparently disappointed. At last he put his elbow on the table, and
						
						laid his right cheek against his hand. Mitya watched him eagerly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p12">"He's alone, he's alone!" he repeated again. "If she were here,
						
						his face would be different."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p13">Strange to say, a queer, irrational vexation rose up in his
						
						heart that she was not here. "It's not that she's not here," he
						
						explained to himself, immediately, "but that I can't tell for
						
						certain whether she is or not." Mitya remembered afterwards that his
						
						mind was at that moment exceptionally clear, that he took in
						
						everything to the slightest detail, and missed no point. But a feeling
						
						of misery, the misery of uncertainty and indecision, was growing in
						
						his heart with every instant. "Is she here or not?" The angry doubt
						
						filled his heart, and suddenly, making up his mind, he put out his
						
						hand and softly knocked on the window frame. He knocked the signal the
						
						old man had agreed upon with Smerdyakov, twice slowly and then three
						
						times more quickly, the signal that meant "Grushenka is here!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p14">The old man started, jerked up his head, and, jumping up
						
						quickly, ran to the window. Mitya slipped away into the shadow. Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch opened the window and thrust his whole head out.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p15">"Grushenka, is it you? Is it you?" he said, in a sort of trembling
						
						half-whisper. "Where are you, my angel, where are you?" He was
						
						fearfully agitated and breathless.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p16">"He's alone," Mitya decided.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p17">"Where are you?" cried the old man again; and he thrust his head
						
						out farther, thrust it out to the shoulders, gazing in all directions,
						
						right and left. "Come here, I've a little present for you. Come,
						
						I'll show you..."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p18">"He means the three thousand," thought Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p19">"But where are you? Are you at the door? I'll open it directly."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p20">And the old man almost climbed out of the window, peering out to
						
						the right, where there was a door into the garden, trying to see
						
						into the darkness. In another second he would certainly have run out
						
						to open the door without waiting for Grushenka's answer.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p21">Mitya looked at him from the side without stirring. The old
						
						man's profile that he loathed so, his pendent Adam's apple, his hooked
						
						nose, his lips that smiled in greedy expectation, were all brightly
						
						lighted up by the slanting lamplight falling on the left from the
						
						room. A horrible fury of hatred suddenly surged up in Mitya's heart:
						
						"There he was, his rival, the man who had tormented him, had ruined
						
						his life!" It was a rush of that sudden, furious, revengeful anger
						
						of which he had spoken, as though foreseeing it, to Alyosha, four days
						
						ago in the arbour, when, in answer to Alyosha's question, "How can you
						
						say you'll kill our father?" "I don't know, I don't know," he had said
						
						then. "Perhaps I shall not kill him, perhaps I shall. I'm afraid he'll
						
						suddenly be so loathsome to me at that moment. I hate his double chin,
						
						his nose, his eyes, his shameless grin. I feel a personal repulsion.
						
						That's what I'm afraid of, that's what may be too much for me."...
						
						This personal repulsion was growing unendurable. Mitya was beside
						
						himself, he suddenly pulled the brass pestle out of his pocket.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p22">"God was watching over me then," Mitya himself said afterwards. At
						
						that very moment Grigory waked up on his bed of sickness. Earlier in
						
						the evening he had undergone the treatment which Smerdyakov had
						
						described to Ivan. He had rubbed himself all over with vodka mixed
						
						with a secret, very strong decoction, had drunk what was left of the
						
						mixture while his wife repeated a "certain prayer" over him, after
						
						which he had gone to bed. Marfa Ignatyevna had tasted the stuff,
						
						too, and, being unused to strong drink, slept like the dead beside her
						
						husband.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p23">But Grigory waked up in the night, quite suddenly, and, after a
						
						moment's reflection, though he immediately felt a sharp pain in his
						
						back, he sat up in bed. Then he deliberated again, got up and
						
						dressed hurriedly. Perhaps his conscience was uneasy at the thought of
						
						sleeping while the house was unguarded "in such perilous times."
						
						Smerdyakov, exhausted by his fit, lay motionless in the next room.
						
						Marfa Ignatyevna did not stir. "The stuff's been too much for the
						
						woman," Grigory thought, glancing at her, and groaning, he went out on
						
						the steps. No doubt he only intended to look out from the steps, for
						
						he was hardly able to walk, the pain in his back and his right leg was
						
						intolerable. But he suddenly remembered that he had not locked the
						
						little gate into the garden that evening. He was the most punctual and
						
						precise of men, a man who adhered to an unchangeable routine, and
						
						habits that lasted for years. Limping and writhing with pain he went
						
						down the steps and towards the garden. Yes, the gate stood wide
						
						open. Mechanically he stepped into the garden. Perhaps he fancied
						
						something, perhaps caught some sound, and, glancing to the left he saw
						
						his master's window open. No one was looking out of it then.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p24">"What's it open for? It's not summer now," thought Grigory, and
						
						suddenly, at that very instant he caught a glimpse of something
						
						extraordinary before him in the garden. Forty paces in front of him
						
						a man seemed to be running in the dark, a sort of shadow was moving
						
						very fast.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p25">"Good Lord!" cried Grigory beside himself, and forgetting the pain
						
						in his back, he hurried to intercept the running figure. He took a
						
						short cut, evidently he knew the garden better; the flying figure went
						
						towards the bath-house, ran behind it and rushed to the garden
						
						fence. Grigory followed, not losing sight of him, and ran,
						
						forgetting everything. He reached the fence at the very moment the man
						
						was climbing over it. Grigory cried out, beside himself, pounced on
						
						him, and clutched his leg in his two hands.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p26">Yes, his foreboding had not deceived him. He recognised him; it
						
						was he, the "monster," the "parricide."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p27">"Parricide! the old man shouted so that the whole neighbourhood
						
						could hear, but he had not time to shout more, he fell at once, as
						
						though struck by lightning.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p28">Mitya jumped back into the garden and bent over the fallen man. In
						
						Mitya's hands was a brass pestle, and he flung it mechanically in
						
						the grass. The pestle fell two paces from Grigory, not in the grass
						
						but on the path, in a most conspicuous place. For some seconds he
						
						examined the prostrate figure before him. The old man's head was
						
						covered with blood. Mitya put out his hand and began feeling it. He
						
						remembered afterwards clearly that he had been awfully anxious to make
						
						sure whether he had broken the old man's skull, or simply stunned
						
						him with the pestle. But the blood was flowing horribly; and in a
						
						moment Mitya's fingers were drenched with the hot stream. He
						
						remembered taking out of his pocket the clean white handkerchief
						
						with which he had provided himself for his visit to Madame Hohlakov,
						
						and putting it to the old man's head, senselessly trying to wipe the
						
						blood from his face and temples. But the handkerchief was instantly
						
						soaked with blood.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p29">"Good heavens! What am I doing it for?" thought Mitya, suddenly
						
						pulling himself together. "If I have broken his skull, how can I
						
						find out now? And what difference does it make now?" he added,
						
						hopelessly. "If I've killed him, I've killed him.... You've come to
						
						grief, old man, so there you must lie!" he said aloud. And suddenly
						
						turning to the fence, he vaulted over it into the lane and fell to
						
						running- the handkerchief soaked with blood he held, crushed up in his
						
						right fist, and as he ran he thrust it into the back pocket of his
						
						coat. He ran headlong, and the few passers-by who met him in the dark,
						
						in the streets, remembered afterwards that they had met a man
						
						running that night. He flew back again to the widow Morozov's house.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p30">Immediately after he had left it that evening, Fenya had rushed to
						
						the chief porter, Nazar Ivanovitch, and besought him, for Christ's
						
						sake, "not to let the captain in again to-day or to-morrow." Nazar
						
						Ivanovitch promised, but went upstairs to his mistress who had
						
						suddenly sent for him, and meeting his nephew, a boy of twenty, who
						
						had recently come from the country, on the way up told him to take his
						
						place, but forgot to mention "the captain." Mitya, running up to the
						
						gate, knocked. The lad instantly recognised him, for Mitya had more
						
						than once tipped him. Opening the gate at once, he let him in, and
						
						hastened to inform him with a good-humoured smile that "Agrafena
						
						Alexandrovna is not at home now, you know."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p31">"Where is she then, Prohor?" asked Mitya, stopping short.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p32">"She set off this evening, some two hours ago, with Timofey, to
						
						Mokroe."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p33">"What for?" cried Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p34">"That I can't say. To see some officer. Someone invited her and
						
						horses were sent to fetch her."
						
							</p><p id="iv_6-p35">Mitya left him, and ran like a madman to Fenya.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - A Sudden Resolution" prev="iv_6" next="vi_4" id="v_5">
					
						<p id="v_5-p1">SHE was sitting in the kitchen with her grandmother; they were
						
						both just going to bed. Relying on Nazar Ivanovitch, they had not
						
						locked themselves in. Mitya ran in, pounced on Fenya and seized her by
						
						the throat.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p2">"Speak at once! Where is she? With whom is she now, at Mokroe?" he
						
						roared furiously.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p3">Both the women squealed.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p4">"Aie! I'll tell you. Aie! Dmitri Fyodorovitch, darling, I'll
						
						tell you everything directly, I won't hide anything," gabbled Fenya,
						
						frightened to death; "she's gone to Mokroe, to her officer."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p5">"What officer?" roared Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p6">"To her officer, the same one she used to know, the one who
						
						threw her over five years ago," cackled Fenya, as fast as she could
						
						speak.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p7">Mitya withdrew the hands with which he was squeezing her throat.
						
						He stood facing her, pale as death, unable to utter a word, but his
						
						eyes showed that he realised it all, all, from the first word, and
						
						guessed the whole position. Poor Fenya was not in a condition at
						
						that moment to observe whether he understood or not. She remained
						
						sitting on the trunk as she had been when he ran into the room,
						
						trembling all over, holding her hands out before her as though
						
						trying to defend herself. She seemed to have grown rigid in that
						
						position. Her wide-opened, scared eyes were fixed immovably upon
						
						him. And to make matters worse, both his hands were smeared with
						
						blood. On the way, as he ran, he must have touched his forehead with
						
						them, wiping off the perspiration, so that on his forehead and his
						
						right cheek were bloodstained patches. Fenya was on the verge of
						
						hysterics. The old cook had jumped up and was staring at him like a
						
						mad woman, almost unconscious with terror.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p8">Mitya stood for a moment, then mechanically sank on to a chair
						
						next to Fenya. He sat, not reflecting but, as it were,
						
						terror-stricken, benumbed. Yet everything was clear as day: that
						
						officer, he knew about him, he knew everything perfectly, he had known
						
						it from Grushenka herself, had known that a letter had come from him a
						
						month before. So that for a month, for a whole month, this had been
						
						going on, a secret from him, till the very arrival of this new man,
						
						and he had never thought of him! But how could he, how could he not
						
						have thought of him? Why was it he had forgotten this officer, like
						
						that, forgotten him as soon as he heard of him? That was the
						
						question that faced him like some monstrous thing. And he looked at
						
						this monstrous thing with horror, growing cold with horror.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p9">But suddenly, as gently and mildly as a gentle and affectionate
						
						child, he began speaking to Fenya as though he had utterly forgotten
						
						how he had scared and hurt her just now. He fell to questioning
						
						Fenya with an extreme preciseness, astonishing in his position, and
						
						though the girl looked wildly at his blood-stained hands, she, too,
						
						with wonderful readiness and rapidity, answered every question as
						
						though eager to put the whole truth and nothing but the truth before
						
						him. Little by little, even with a sort of enjoyment, she began
						
						explaining every detail, not wanting to torment him, but, as it
						
						were, eager to be of the utmost service to him. She described the
						
						whole of that day, in great detail, the visit of Rakitin and
						
						Alyosha, how she, Fenya, had stood on the watch, how the mistress
						
						had set off, and how she had called out of the window to Alyosha to
						
						give him, Mitya, her greetings, and to tell him "to remember for
						
						ever how she had loved him for an hour."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p10">Hearing of the message, Mitya suddenly smiled, and there was a
						
						flush of colour on his pale cheeks. At the same moment Fenya said to
						
						him, not a bit afraid now to be inquisitive:
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p11">"Look at your hands, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. They're all over blood!
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p12">"Yes," answered Mitya mechanically. He looked carelessly at his
						
						hands and at once forgot them and Fenya's question.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p13">He sank into silence again. Twenty minutes had passed since he had
						
						run in. His first horror was over, but evidently some new fixed
						
						determination had taken possession of him. He suddenly stood up,
						
						smiling dreamily.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p14">"What has happened to you, sir?" said Fenya, pointing to his hands
						
						again. She spoke compassionately, as though she felt very near to
						
						him now in his grief. Mitya looked at his hands again.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p15">"That's blood, Fenya," he said, looking at her with a strange
						
						expression. "That's human blood, and my God! why was it shed? But...
						
						Fenya... there's a fence here" (he looked at her as though setting her
						
						a riddle), "a high fence, and terrible to look at. But at dawn
						
						to-morrow, when the sun rises, Mitya will leap over that fence.... You
						
						don't understand what fence, Fenya, and, never mind.... You'll hear
						
						to-morrow and understand... and now, good-bye. I won't stand in her
						
						way. I'll step aside, I know how to step aside. Live, my joy.... You
						
						loved me for an hour, remember Mityenka Karamazov so for ever....
						
						She always used to call me Mityenka, do you remember?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p16">And with those words he went suddenly out of the kitchen. Fenya
						
						was almost more frightened at this sudden departure than she had
						
						been when he ran in and attacked her.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p17">Just ten minutes later Dmitri went in to Pyotr Ilyitch Perhotin,
						
						the young official with whom he had pawned his pistols. It was by
						
						now half-past eight, and Pyotr Ilyitch had finished his evening tea,
						
						and had just put his coat on again to go to the Metropolis to play
						
						billiards. Mitya caught him coming out.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p18">Seeing him with his face all smeared with blood, the young man
						
						uttered a cry of surprise.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p19">"Good heavens! What is the matter?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p20">"I've come for my pistols," said Mitya, "and brought you the
						
						money. And thanks very much. I'm in a hurry, Pyotr Ilyitch, please
						
						make haste."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p21">Pyotr Ilyitch grew more and more surprised; he suddenly caught
						
						sight of a bundle of banknotes in Mitya's hand, and what was more,
						
						he had walked in holding the notes as no one walks in and no one
						
						carries money: he had them in his right hand, and held them
						
						outstretched as if to show them. Perhotin's servant-boy, who met Mitya
						
						in the passage, said afterwards that he walked into the passage in the
						
						same way, with the money outstretched in his hand, so he must have
						
						been carrying them like that even in the streets. They were all
						
						rainbow-coloured hundred-rouble notes, and the fingers holding them
						
						were covered with blood.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p22">When Pyotr Ilyitch was questioned later on as to the sum of money,
						
						he said that it was difficult to judge at a glance, but that it
						
						might have been two thousand, or perhaps three, but it was a big,
						
						"fat" bundle. "Dmitri Fyodorovitch," so he testified afterwards,
						
						"seemed unlike himself, too; not drunk, but, as it were, exalted, lost
						
						to everything, but at the same time, as it were, absorbed, as though
						
						pondering and searching for something and unable to come to a
						
						decision. He was in great haste, answered abruptly and very strangely,
						
						and at moments seemed not at all dejected but quite cheerful."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p23">"But what is the matter with you? What's wrong?" cried Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch, looking wildly at his guest. "How is it that you're all
						
						covered with blood? Have you had a fall? Look at yourself!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p24">He took him by the elbow and led him to the glass.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p25">Seeing his blood-stained face, Mitya started and scowled
						
						wrathfully.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p26">"Damnation! That's the last straw," he muttered angrily, hurriedly
						
						changing the notes from his right hand to the left, and impulsively
						
						jerked the handkerchief out of his pocket. But the handkerchief turned
						
						out to be soaked with blood, too (it was the handkerchief he had
						
						used to wipe Grigory's face). There was scarcely a white spot on it,
						
						and it had not merely begun to dry, but had stiffened into a
						
						crumpled ball and could not be pulled apart. Mitya threw it angrily on
						
						the floor.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p27">"Oh, damn it!" he said. "Haven't you a rag of some sort... to wipe
						
						my face?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p28">"So you're only stained, not wounded? You'd better wash," said
						
						Pyotr Ilyitch. "Here's a wash-stand. I'll pour you out some water."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p29">"A wash-stand? That's all right... but where am I to put this?"
						
						</p><p id="v_5-p30">With the strangest perplexity he indicated his bundle of
						
						hundred-rouble notes, looking inquiringly at Pyotr Ilyitch as though
						
						it were for him to decide what he, Mitya, was to do with his own
						
						money.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p31">"In your pocket, or on the table here. They won't be lost."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p32">"In my pocket? Yes, in my pocket. All right.... But, I say, that's
						
						all nonsense," he cried, as though suddenly coming out of his
						
						absorption. "Look here, let's first settle that business of the
						
						pistols. Give them back to me. Here's your money... because I am in
						
						great need of them... and I haven't a minute, a minute to spare."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p33">And taking the topmost note from the bundle he held it out to
						
						Pyotr Ilyitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p34">"But I shan't have change enough. Haven't you less?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p35">"No," said Mitya, looking again at the bundle, and as though not
						
						trusting his own words he turned over two or three of the topmost
						
						ones.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p36">"No, they're all alike," he added, and again he looked inquiringly
						
						at Pyotr Ilyitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p37">"How have you grown so rich?" the latter asked. "Wait, I'll send
						
						my boy to Plotnikov's, they close late- to see if they won't change
						
						it. Here, Misha!" he called into the passage.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p38">"To Plotnikov's shop- first-rate!" cried Mitya, as though struck
						
						by an idea. "Misha," he turned to the boy as he came in, "look here,
						
						run to Plotnikov's and tell them that Dmitri Fyodorovitch sends his
						
						greetings, and will be there directly.... But listen, listen, tell
						
						them to have champagne, three dozen bottles, ready before I come,
						
						and packed as it was to take to Mokroe. I took four dozen with me
						
						then," he added (suddenly addressing Pyotr Ilyitch); "they know all
						
						about it, don't you trouble, Misha," he turned again to the boy.
						
						"Stay, listen; tell them to put in cheese, Strasburg pies, smoked
						
						fish, ham, caviare, and everything, everything they've got, up to a
						
						hundred roubles, or a hundred and twenty as before.... But wait: don't
						
						let them forget dessert, sweets, pears, watermelons, two or three or
						
						four- no, one melon's enough, and chocolate, candy, toffee,
						
						fondants; in fact, everything I took to Mokroe before, three hundred
						
						roubles' worth with the champagne... let it be just the same again.
						
						And remember, Misha, if you are called Misha- His name is Misha, isn't
						
						it?" He turned to Pyotr Ilyitch again.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p39">"Wait a minute," Pyotr Ilyitch intervened listening and watching
						
						him uneasily, "you'd better go yourself and tell them. He'll muddle
						
						it."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p40">"He will, I see he will! Eh, Misha! Why, I was going to kiss you
						
						for the commission.... If you don't make a mistake, there's ten
						
						roubles for you, run along, make haste.... Champagne's the chief
						
						thing, let them bring up champagne. And brandy, too, and red and white
						
						wine, and all I had then.... They know what I had then."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p41">"But listen!" Pyotr Ilyitch interrupted with some impatience. "I
						
						say, let him simply run and change the money and tell them not to
						
						close, and you go and tell them.... Give him your note. Be off, Misha!
						
						Put your best leg forward!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p42">Pyotr Ilyitch seemed to hurry Misha off on purpose, because the
						
						boy remained standing with his mouth and eyes wide open, apparently
						
						understanding little of Mitya's orders, gazing up with amazement and
						
						terror at his bloodstained face and the trembling blood-stained
						
						fingers that held the notes.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p43">"Well, now come and wash," said Pyotr Ilyitch sternly. "Put the
						
						money on the table or else in your pocket.... That's right, come
						
						along. But take off your coat."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p44">And beginning to help him off with his coat, he cried out again:
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p45">"Look, your coat's covered with blood, too!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p46">"That... it's not the coat. It's only a little here on the
						
						sleeve.... And that's only here where the handkerchief lay. It must
						
						have soaked through. I must have sat on the handkerchief at Fenya's,
						
						and the blood's come through," Mitya explained at once with a
						
						child-like unconsciousness that was astounding. Pyotr Ilyitch
						
						listened, frowning.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p47">"Well, you must have been up to something; you must have been
						
						fighting with someone," he muttered.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p48">They began to wash. Pyotr Ilyitch held the jug and poured out
						
						the water. Mitya, in desperate haste, scarcely soaped his hands
						
						(they were trembling, and Pyotr Ilyitch remembered it afterwards). But
						
						the young official insisted on his soaping them thoroughly and rubbing
						
						them more. He seemed to exercise more and more sway over Mitya, as
						
						time went on. It may be noted in passing that he was a young man of
						
						sturdy character.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p49">"Look, you haven't got your nails clean. Now rub your face;
						
						here, on your temples, by your ear.... Will you go in that shirt?
						
						Where are you going? Look, all the cuff of your right sleeve is
						
						covered with blood."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p50">"Yes, it's all bloody," observed Mitya, looking at the cuff of his
						
						shirt.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p51">"Then change your shirt."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p52">"I haven't time. You see I'll..." Mitya went on with the same
						
						confiding ingenuousness, drying his face and hands on the towel, and
						
						putting on his coat. "I'll turn it up at the wrist. It won't be seen
						
						under the coat.... You see!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p53">"Tell me now, what game have you been up to? Have you been
						
						fighting with someone? In the tavern again, as before? Have you been
						
						beating that captain again?" Pyotr Ilyitch asked him reproachfully.
						
						"Whom have you been beating now... or killing, perhaps?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p54">"Nonsense!" said Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p55">"Don't worry," said Mitya, and he suddenly laughed. "I smashed
						
						an old woman in the market-place just now."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p56">"Smashed? An old woman?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p57">"An old man!" cried Mitya, looking Pyotr Ilyitch straight in the
						
						face, laughing, and shouting at him as though he were deaf.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p58">"Confound it! An old woman, an old man.... Have you killed
						
						someone?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p59">"We made it up. We had a row- and made it up. In a place I know
						
						of. We parted friends. A fool.... He's forgiven me.... He's sure to
						
						have forgiven me by now... if he had got up, he wouldn't have forgiven
						
						me"- Mitya suddenly winked- "only damn him, you know, I say, Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch, damn him! Don't worry about him! I don't want to just now!"
						
						Mitya snapped out, resolutely.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p60">"Whatever do you want to go picking quarrels with everyone for?...
						
						Just as you did with that captain over some nonsense.... You've been
						
						fighting and now you're rushing off on the spree- that's you all over!
						
						Three dozen champagne- what do you want all that for?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p61">"Bravo! Now give me the pistols. Upon my honour I've no time
						
						now. I should like to have a chat with you, my dear boy, but I haven't
						
						the time. And there's no need, it's too late for talking. Where's my
						
						money? Where have I put it?" he cried, thrusting his hands into his
						
						pockets.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p62">"You put it on the table... yourself.... Here it is. Had you
						
						forgotten? Money's like dirt or water to you, it seems. Here are
						
						your pistols. It's an odd thing, at six o'clock you pledged them for
						
						ten roubles, and now you've got thousands. Two or three I should say."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p63">"Three, you bet," laughed Mitya, stuffing the notes into the
						
						side-pocket of his trousers.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p64">"You'll lose it like that. Have you found a gold mine?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p65">"The mines? The gold mines?" Mitya shouted at the top of his voice
						
						and went off into a roar of laughter. "Would you like to go to the
						
						mines, Perhotin? There's a lady here who'll stump up three thousand
						
						for you, if only you'll go. She did it for me, she's so awfully fond
						
						of gold mines. Do you know Madame Hohlakov?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p66">"I don't know her, but I've heard of her and seen her. Did she
						
						really give you three thousand? Did she really?" said Pyotr Ilyitch,
						
						eyeing him dubiously.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p67">"As soon as the sun rises to-morrow, as soon as Phoebus, ever
						
						young, flies upwards, praising and glorifying God, you go to her, this
						
						Madame Hohlakov, and ask her whether she did stump up that three
						
						thousand or not. Try and find out."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p68">"I don't know on what terms you are... since you say it so
						
						positively, I suppose she did give it to you. You've got the money
						
						in your hand, but instead of going to Siberia you're spending it
						
						all.... Where are you really off to now, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p69">"To Mokroe."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p70">"To Mokroe? But it's night!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p71">"Once the lad had all, now the lad has naught," cried Mitya
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p72">"How 'naught'? You say that with all those thousands!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p73">"I'm not talking about thousands. Damn thousands! I'm talking of
						
						female character.</p><p id="v_5-p74">
						
						
						
						</p><p id="v_5-p75">                   Fickle is the heart of woman
						
						</p><p id="v_5-p76">                   Treacherous and full of vice;
						
						
						
						</p><p id="v_5-p77" /><p id="v_5-p78">I agree with Ulysses. That's what he says."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p79">"I don't understand you!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p80">"Am I drunk?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p81">"Not drunk, but worse."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p82">"I'm drunk in spirit, Pyotr Ilyitch, drunk in spirit! But that's
						
						enough!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p83">"What are you doing, loading the pistol?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p84">"I'm loading the pistol."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p85">Unfastening the pistol-case, Mitya actually opened the powder
						
						horn, and carefully sprinkled and rammed in the charge. Then he took
						
						the bullet and, before inserting it, held it in two fingers in front
						
						of the candle.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p86">"Why are you looking at the bullet?" asked Pyotr Ilyitch, watching
						
						him with uneasy curiosity.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p87">"Oh, a fancy. Why, if you meant to put that bullet in your
						
						brain, would you look at it or not?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p88">"Why look at it?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p89">"It's going into my brain, so it's interesting to look and see
						
						what it's like. But that's foolishness, a moment's foolishness. Now
						
						that's done," he added, putting in the bullet and driving it home with
						
						the ramrod. "Pyotr Ilyitch, my dear fellow, that's nonsense, all
						
						nonsense, and if only you knew what nonsense! Give me a little piece
						
						of paper now."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p90">"Here's some paper."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p91">"No, a clean new piece, writing-paper. That's right."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p92">And taking a pen from the table, Mitya rapidly wrote two lines,
						
						folded the paper in four, and thrust it in his waistcoat pocket. He
						
						put the pistols in the case, locked it up, and kept it in his hand.
						
						Then he looked at Pyotr Ilyitch with a slow, thoughtful smile.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p93">"Now, let's go."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p94">"Where are we going? No, wait a minute.... Are you thinking of
						
						putting that bullet in your brain, perhaps?" Pyotr Ilyitch asked
						
						uneasily.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p95">"I was fooling about the bullet! I want to live. I love life,
						
						You may be sure of that. I love golden-haired Phorbus and his warm
						
						light.... Dear Pyotr Ilyitch, do you know how to step aside?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p96">"What do you mean by 'stepping aside'?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p97">"Making way. Making way for a dear creature, and for one I hate.
						
						And to let the one I hate become dear- that's what making way means!
						
						And to say to them: God bless you, go your way, pass on, while I-"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p98">"While you-?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p99">"That's enough, let's go."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p100">"Upon my word. I'll tell someone to prevent your going there,"
						
						said Pyotr Ilyitch, looking at him. "What are you going to Mokroe for,
						
						now?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p101">"There's a woman there, a woman. That's enough for you. You shut
						
						up."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p102">"Listen, though you're such a savage I've always liked you.... I
						
						feel anxious."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p103">"Thanks, old fellow. I'm a savage you say. Savages, savages!
						
						That's what I am always saying. Savages! Why, here's Misha! I was
						
						forgetting him."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p104">Misha ran in, post-haste, with a handful of notes in change, and
						
						reported that everyone was in a bustle at the Plotnikovs'; "They're
						
						carrying down the bottles, and the fish, and the tea; it will all be
						
						ready directly." Mitya seized ten roubles and handed it to Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch, then tossed another ten-rouble note to Misha.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p105">"Don't dare to do such a thing!" cried Pyotr Ilyitch. "I won't
						
						have it in my house, it's a bad, demoralising habit. Put your money
						
						away. Here, put it here, why waste it? It would come in handy
						
						to-morrow, and I dare say you'll be coming to me to borrow ten roubles
						
						again. Why do you keep putting the notes in your side pocket? Ah,
						
						you'll lose them!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p106">"I say, my dear fellow, let's go to Mokroe together."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p107">"What should I go for?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p108">"I say, let's open a bottle at once, and drink to life! I want
						
						to drink, and especially to drink with you. I've never drunk with you,
						
						have I?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p109">"Very well, we can go to the Metropolis. I was just going there."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p110">"I haven't time for that. Let's drink at the Plotnikovs', in the
						
						back room. Shall I ask you a riddle?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p111">"Ask away."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p112">Mitya took the piece of paper out of his waistcoat pocket,
						
						unfolded it and showed it. In a large, distinct hand was written: "I
						
						punish myself for my whole life; my whole life I punish!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p113">"I will certainly speak to someone. I'll go at once," said Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch, after reading the paper.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p114">"You won't have time, dear boy, come and have a drink. March!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p115">Plotnikov's shop was at the corner of the street, next door but
						
						one to Pyotr Ilyitch's. It was the largest grocery shop in our town,
						
						and by no means a bad one, belonging to some rich merchants. They kept
						
						everything that could be got in a Petersburg shop, grocery of all
						
						sort, wines "bottled by the brothers Eliseyev," fruits, cigars, tea,
						
						coffee, sugar, and so on. There were three shop-assistants and two
						
						errand boys always employed. Though our part of the country had
						
						grown poorer, the landowners had gone away, and trade had got worse,
						
						yet the grocery stores flourished as before, every year with
						
						increasing prosperity; there were plenty of purchasers for their
						
						goods.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p116">They were awaiting Mitya with impatience in the shop. They had
						
						vivid recollections of how he had bought, three or four weeks ago,
						
						wine and goods of all sorts to the value of several hundred roubles,
						
						paid for in cash (they would never have let him have anything on
						
						credit, of course). They remembered that then, as now, he had had a
						
						bundle of hundred-rouble notes in his hand, and had scattered them
						
						at random, without bargaining, without reflecting, or caring to
						
						reflect what use so much wine and provisions would be to him. The
						
						story was told all over the town that, driving off then with Grushenka
						
						to Mokroe, he had "spent three thousand in one night and the following
						
						day, and had come back from the spree without a penny." He had
						
						picked up a whole troop of gypsies (encamped in our neighbourhood at
						
						the time), who for two days got money without stint out of him while
						
						he was drunk, and drank expensive wine without stint. People used to
						
						tell, laughing at Mitya, how he had given champagne to grimy-handed
						
						peasants, and feasted the village women and girls on sweets and
						
						Strasburg pies. Though to laugh at Mitya to his face was rather a
						
						risky proceeding, there was much laughter behind his back,
						
						especially in the tavern, at his own ingenuous public avowal that
						
						all he had got out of Grushenka by this "escapade" was "permission
						
						to kiss her foot, and that was the utmost she had allowed him."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p117">By the time Mitya and Pyotr Ilyitch reached the shop, they found a
						
						cart with three horses harnessed abreast with bells, and with
						
						Andrey, the driver, ready waiting for Mitya at the entrance. In the
						
						shop they had almost entirely finished packing one box of
						
						provisions, and were only waiting for Mitya's arrival to nail it
						
						down and put it in the cart. Pyotr Ilyitch was astounded.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p118">"Where did this cart come from in such a hurry?" he asked Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p119">"I met Andrey as I ran to you, and told him to drive straight here
						
						to the shop. There's no time to lose. Last time I drove with
						
						Timofey, but Timofey now has gone on before me with the witch. Shall
						
						we be very late, Andrey?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p120">"They'll only get there an hour at most before us, not even that
						
						maybe. I got Timofey ready to start. I know how he'll go. Their pace
						
						won't be ours, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. How could it be? They won't get
						
						there an hour earlier!" Andrey, a lanky, red-haired, middle-aged
						
						driver, wearing a full-skirted coat, and with a kaftan on his arm,
						
						replied warmly.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p121">"Fifty roubles for vodka if we're only an hour behind them."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p122">"I warrant the time, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. Ech, they won't be
						
						half an hour before us, let alone an hour."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p123">Though Mitya bustled about seeing after things, he gave his orders
						
						strangely, as it were, disconnectedly, and inconsecutively. He began a
						
						sentence and forgot the end of it. Pyotr Ilyitch found himself obliged
						
						to come to the rescue.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p124">"Four hundred roubles' worth, not less than four hundred
						
						roubles' worth, just as it was then," commanded Mitya. "Four dozen
						
						champagne, not a bottle less."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p125">"What do you want with so much? What's it for? Stay!" cried
						
						Pyotr Ilyitch. "What's this box? What's in it? Surely there isn't four
						
						hundred roubles' worth here?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p126">The officious shopmen began explaining with oily politeness that
						
						the first box contained only half a dozen bottles of champagne, and
						
						only "the most indispensable articles," such as savouries, sweets,
						
						toffee, etc. But the main part of the goods ordered would be packed
						
						and sent off, as on the previous occasion, in a special cart also with
						
						three horses travelling at full speed, so that it would arrive not
						
						more than an hour later than Dmitri Fyodorovitch himself.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p127">"Not more than an hour! Not more than an hour! And put in more
						
						toffee and fondants. The girls there are so fond of it," Mitya
						
						insisted hotly.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p128">"The fondants are all right. But what do you want with four
						
						dozen of champagne? One would be enough," said Pyotr Ilyitch, almost
						
						angry. He began bargaining, asking for a bill of the goods, and
						
						refused to be satisfied. But he only succeeded in saving a hundred
						
						roubles. In the end it was agreed that only three hundred roubles'
						
						worth should be sent.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p129">"Well, you may go to the devil!" cried Pyotr Ilyitch, on second
						
						thoughts. "What's it to do with me? Throw away your money, since
						
						it's cost you nothing."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p130">"This way, my economist, this way, don't be angry." Mitya drew him
						
						into a room at the back of the shop. "They'll give us a bottle here
						
						directly. We'll taste it. Ech, Pyotr Ilyitch, come along with me,
						
						for you're a nice fellow, the sort I like."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p131">Mitya sat down on a wicker chair, before a little table, covered
						
						with a dirty dinner-napkin. Pyotr Ilyitch sat down opposite, and the
						
						champagne soon appeared, and oysters were suggested to the
						
						gentlemen. "First-class oysters, the last lot in."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p132">"Hang the oysters. I don't eat them. And we don't need
						
						anything," cried Pyotr Ilyitch, almost angrily.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p133">"There's no time for oysters," said Mitya. "And I'm not hungry. Do
						
						you know, friend," he said suddenly, with feeling, "I never have liked
						
						all this disorder."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p134">"Who does like it? Three dozen of champagne for peasants, upon
						
						my word, that's enough to make anyone angry!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p135">"That's not what I mean. I'm talking of a higher order. There's no
						
						order in me, no higher order. But... that's all over. There's no
						
						need to grieve about it. It's too late, damn it! My whole life has
						
						been disorder, and one must set it in order. Is that a pun, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p136">"You're raving, not making puns!</p><p id="v_5-p137">
						
						
						
						</p><p id="v_5-p138">                   "Glory be to God in Heaven,
						
						</p><p id="v_5-p139">                    Glory be to God in me. . .
						
						
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p140" /><p id="v_5-p141">"That verse came from my heart once, it's not a verse, but a
						
						tear.... I made it myself... not while I was pulling the captain's
						
						beard, though..."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p142">"Why do you bring him in all of a sudden?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p143">"Why do I bring him in? Foolery! All things come to an end; all
						
						things are made equal. That's the long and short of it."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p144">"You know, I keep thinking of your pistols."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p145">"That's all foolery, too! Drink, and don't be fanciful. I love
						
						life. I've loved life too much, shamefully much. Enough! Let's drink
						
						to life, dear boy, I propose the toast. Why am I pleased with
						
						myself? I'm a scoundrel, but I'm satisfied with myself. And yet I'm
						
						tortured by the thought that I'm a scoundrel, but satisfied with
						
						myself. I bless the creation. I'm ready to bless God and His
						
						creation directly, but... I must kill one noxious insect for fear it
						
						should crawl and spoil life for others.... Let us drink to life,
						
						dear brother. What can be more precious than life? Nothing! To life,
						
						and to one queen of queens!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p146">"Let's drink to life and to your queen, too, if you like."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p147">They drank a glass each. Although Mitya was excited and expansive,
						
						yet he was melancholy, too. It was as though some heavy,
						
						overwhelming anxiety were weighing upon him.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p148">"Misha... here's your Misha come! Misha, come here, my boy,
						
						drink this glass to Phoebus the golden-haired, of to-morrow morn..."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p149">"What are you giving it him for?" cried Pyotr Ilyitch, irritably.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p150">"Yes, yes, yes, let me! I want to!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p151">"E- ech!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p152">Misha emptied the glass, bowed, and ran out.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p153">"He'll remember it afterwards," Mitya remarked. "Woman, I love
						
						woman! What is woman? The queen of creation! My heart is sad, my heart
						
						is sad, Pyotr Ilyitch. Do you remember Hamlet? 'I am very sorry,
						
						good Horatio! Alas, poor Yorick!' Perhaps that's me, Yorick? Yes,
						
						I'm Yorick now, and a skull afterwards."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p154">Pyotr Ilyitch listened in silence. Mitya, too, was silent for a
						
						while.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p155">"What dog's that you've got here?" he asked the shopman, casually,
						
						noticing a pretty little lap-dog with dark eyes, sitting in the
						
						corner.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p156">"It belongs to Varvara Alexyevna, the mistress," answered the
						
						clerk. "She brought it and forgot it here. It must be taken back to
						
						her."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p157">"I saw one like it... in the regiment... " murmured Mitya
						
						dreamily, "only that one had its hind leg broken.... By the way, Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch, I wanted to ask you: have you ever stolen anything in your
						
						life?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p158">"What a question!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p159">"Oh, I didn't mean anything. From somebody's pocket, you know. I
						
						don't mean government money, everyone steals that, and no doubt you
						
						do, too..."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p160">"You go to the devil."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p161">"I'm talking of other people's money. Stealing straight out of a
						
						pocket? Out of a purse, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p162">"I stole twenty copecks from my mother when I was nine years
						
						old. I took it off the table on the sly, and held it tight in my
						
						hand."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p163">"Well, and what happened?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p164">"Oh, nothing. I kept it three days, then I felt ashamed,
						
						confessed, and gave it back."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p165">"And what then?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p166">"Naturally I was whipped. But why do you ask? Have you stolen
						
						something?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p167">"I have," said Mitya, winking slyly.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p168">"What have you stolen?" inquired Pyotr Ilyitch curiously.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p169">"I stole twenty copecks from my mother when I was nine years
						
						old, and gave it back three days after."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p170">As he said this, Mitya suddenly got up.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p171">"Dmitri Fyodorovitch, won't you come now?" called Andrey from
						
						the door of the shop.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p172">"Are you ready? We'll come!" Mitya started. "A few more last words
						
						and- Andrey, a glass of vodka at starting. Give him some brandy as
						
						well! That box" (the one with the pistols) "put under my seat.
						
						Good-bye, Pyotr Ilyitch, don't remember evil against me."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p173">"But you're coming back to-morrow?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p174">"Will you settle the little bill now?" cried the clerk,
						
						springing forward.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p175">"Oh yes, the bill. Of course."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p176">He pulled the bundle of notes out of his pocket again, picked
						
						out three hundred roubles, threw them on the counter, and ran
						
						hurriedly out of the shop. Everyone followed him out, bowing and
						
						wishing him good luck. Andrey, coughing from the brandy he had just
						
						swallowed, jumped up on the box. But Mitya was only just taking his
						
						seat when suddenly to his surprise he saw Fenya before him. She ran up
						
						panting, clasped her hands before him with a cry, and plumped down
						
						at his feet.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p177">"Dmitri Fyodorovitch, dear good Dmitri Fyodorovitch, don't harm my
						
						mistress. And it was I told you all about it.... And don't murder him,
						
						he came first, he's hers! He'll marry Agrafena Alexandrovna now.
						
						That's why he's come back from Siberia. Dmitri Fyodorovitch, dear,
						
						don't take a fellow creature's life!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p178">"Tut-tut-tut! That's it, is it? So you're off there to make
						
						trouble!" muttered Pyotr Ilyitch. "Now, it's all clear, as clear as
						
						daylight. Dmitri Fyodorovitch, give me your pistols at once if you
						
						mean to behave like a man," he shouted aloud to Mitya. "Do you hear,
						
						Dmitri?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p179">"The pistols? Wait a bit, brother, I'll throw them into the pool
						
						on the road," answered Mitya. "Fenya, get up, don't kneel to me. Mitya
						
						won't hurt anyone, the silly fool won't hurt anyone again. But I
						
						say, Fenya," he shouted, after having taken his seat. "I hurt you just
						
						now, so forgive me and have pity on me, forgive a scoundrel.... But it
						
						doesn't matter if you don't. It's all the same now. Now then,
						
						Andrey, look alive, fly along full speed!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p180">Andrey whipped up the horses, and the bells began ringing.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p181">"Good-bye, Pyotr Ilyitch! My last tear is for you!..."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p182">"He's not drunk, but he keeps babbling like a lunatic," Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch thought as he watched him go. He had half a mind to stay and
						
						see the cart packed with the remaining wines and provisions, knowing
						
						that they would deceive and defraud Mitya. But, suddenly feeling vexed
						
						with himself, he turned away with a curse and went to the tavern to
						
						play billiards.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p183">"He's a fool, though he's a good fellow," he muttered as he
						
						went. "I've heard of that officer, Grushenka's former flame. Well,
						
						if he has turned up.... Ech, those pistols! Damn it all! I'm not his
						
						nurse! Let them do what they like! Besides, it'll all come to nothing.
						
						They're a set of brawlers, that's all. They'll drink and fight,
						
						fight and make friends again. They are not men who do anything real.
						
						What does he mean by 'I'm stepping aside, I'm punishing myself'? It'll
						
						come to nothing! He's shouted such phrases a thousand times, drunk, in
						
						the taverns. But now he's not drunk. 'Drunk in spirit'- they're fond
						
						of fine phrases, the villains. Am I his nurse? He must have been
						
						fighting, his face was all over blood. With whom? I shall find out
						
						at the Metropolis. And his handkerchief was soaked in blood.... It's
						
						still lying on my floor.... Hang it!"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p184">He reached the tavern in a bad humour and at once made up a
						
						game. The game cheered him. He played a second game, and suddenly
						
						began telling one of his partners that Dmitri Karamazov had come in
						
						for some cash again- something like three thousand roubles, and had
						
						gone to Mokroe again to spend it with Grushenka.... This news roused
						
						singular interest in his listeners. They all spoke of it, not
						
						laughing, but with a strange gravity. They left off playing.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p185">"Three thousand? But where can he have got three thousand?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p186">Questions were asked. The story of Madame Hohlakov's present was
						
						received with scepticism.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p187">"Hasn't he robbed his old father?- that's the question."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p188">"Three thousand! There's something odd about it."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p189">"He boasted aloud that he would kill his father; we all heard him,
						
						here. And it was three thousand he talked about..."
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p190">Pyotr Ilyitch listened. All at once he became short and dry in his
						
						answers. He said not a word about the blood on Mitya's face and hands,
						
						though he had meant to speak of it at first.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p191">They began a third game, and by degrees the talk about Mitya
						
						died away. But by the end of the third game, Pyotr Ilyitch felt no
						
						more desire for billiards; he laid down the cue, and without having
						
						supper as he had intended, he walked out of the tavern. When he
						
						reached the market-place he stood still in perplexity, wondering at
						
						himself. He realised that what he wanted was to go to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's and find out if anything had happened there. "On
						
						account of some stupid nonsense as it's sure to turn out- am I going
						
						to wake up the household and make a scandal? Fooh! damn it, is it my
						
						business to look after them?"
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p192">In a very bad humour he went straight home, and suddenly
						
						remembered Fenya. "Damn it all! I ought to have questioned her just
						
						now," he thought with vexation, "I should have heard everything."
						
						And the desire to speak to her, and so find out, became so pressing
						
						and importunate that when he was halfway home he turned abruptly and
						
						went towards the house where Grushenka lodged. Going up to the gate he
						
						knocked. The sound of the knock in the silence of the night sobered
						
						him and made him feel annoyed. And no one answered him; everyone in
						
						the house was asleep.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p193">"And I shall be making a fuss!" he thought, with a feeling of
						
						positive discomfort. But instead of going away altogether, he fell
						
						to knocking again with all his might, filling the street with clamour.
						
							</p><p id="v_5-p194">"Not coming? Well, I will knock them up, I will!" he muttered at
						
						each knock, fuming at himself, but at the same time he redoubled his
						
						knocks on the gate.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - I Am Coming, Too!" prev="v_5" next="vii_4" id="vi_4">
					
					
					
						<p id="vi_4-p1">BUT Dmitri Fyodorovitch was speeding along the road. It was a
						
						little more than twenty versts to Mokroe, but Andrey's three horses
						
						galloped at such a pace that the distance might be covered in an
						
						hour and a quarter. The swift motion revived Mitya. The air was
						
						fresh and cool, there were big stars shining in the sky. It was the
						
						very night, and perhaps the very hour, in which Alyosha fell on the
						
						earth, and rapturously swore to love it for ever and ever.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p2">All was confusion, confusion in Mitya's soul, but although many
						
						things were goading his heart, at that moment his whole being was
						
						yearning for her, his queen, to whom he was flying to look on her
						
						for the last time. One thing I can say for certain; his heart did
						
						not waver for one instant. I shall perhaps not be believed when I
						
						say that this jealous lover felt not the slightest jealousy of this
						
						new rival, who seemed to have sprung out of the earth. If any other
						
						had appeared on the scene, he would have been jealous at once, and
						
						would-perhaps have stained his fierce hands with blood again. But as
						
						he flew through the night, he felt no envy, no hostility even, for the
						
						man who had been her first lover.... It is true he had not yet seen
						
						him.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p3">"Here there was no room for dispute: it was her right and his;
						
						this was her first love which, after five years, she had not
						
						forgotten; so she had loved him only for those five years, and I,
						
						how do I come in? What right have I? Step aside, Mitya, and make
						
						way! What am I now? Now everything is over apart from the officer even
						
						if he had not appeared, everything would be over..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p4">These words would roughly have expressed his feelings, if he had
						
						been capable of reasoning. But he could not reason at that moment. His
						
						present plan of action had arisen without reasoning. At Fenya's
						
						first words, it had sprung from feeling, and been adopted in a
						
						flash, with all its consequences. And yet, in spite of his resolution,
						
						there was confusion in his soul, an agonising confusion: his
						
						resolution did not give him peace. There was so much behind that
						
						tortured him. And it seemed strange to him, at moments, to think
						
						that he had written his own sentence of death with pen and paper: "I
						
						punish myself," and the paper was lying there in his pocket, ready;
						
						the pistol was loaded; he had already resolved how, next morning, he
						
						would meet the first warm ray of "golden-haired Phoebus."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p5">And yet he could not be quit of the past, of all that he had
						
						left behind and that tortured him. He felt that miserably, and the
						
						thought of it sank into his heart with despair. There was one moment
						
						when he felt an impulse to stop Andrey, to jump out of the cart, to
						
						pull out his loaded pistol, and to make an end of everything without
						
						waiting for the dawn. But that moment flew by like a spark. The horses
						
						galloped on, "devouring space," and as he drew near his goal, again
						
						the thought of her, of her alone, took more and more complete
						
						possession of his soul, chasing away the fearful images that had
						
						been haunting it. Oh, how he longed to look upon her, if only for a
						
						moment, if only from a distance!
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p6">"She's now with him," he thought, "now I shall see what she
						
						looks like with him, her first love, and that's all I want." Never had
						
						this woman, who was such a fateful influence in his life, aroused such
						
						love in his breast, such new and unknown feeling, surprising even to
						
						himself, a feeling tender to devoutness, to self-effacement before
						
						her! "I will efface myself!" he said, in a rush of almost hysterical
						
						ecstasy.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p7">They had been galloping nearly an hour. Mitya was silent, and
						
						though Andrey was, as a rule, a talkative peasant, he did not utter
						
						a word, either. He seemed afraid to talk, he only whipped up smartly
						
						his three lean, but mettlesome, bay horses. Suddenly Mitya cried out
						
						in horrible anxiety:
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p8">"Andrey! What if they're asleep?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p9">This thought fell upon him like a blow. It had not occurred to him
						
						before.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p10">"It may well be that they're gone to bed by now, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p11">Mitya frowned as though in pain. Yes, indeed... he was rushing
						
						there... with such feelings... while they were asleep... she was
						
						asleep, perhaps, there too.... An angry feeling surged up in his
						
						heart.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p12">"Drive on, Andrey! Whip them up! Look alive!" he cried, beside
						
						himself.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p13">"But maybe they're not in bed!" Andrey went on after a pause.
						
						"Timofey said they were a lot of them there-."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p14">"At the station?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p15">"Not at the posting-station, but at Plastunov's, at the inn, where
						
						they let out horses, too."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p16">"I know. So you say there are a lot of them? How's that? Who are
						
						they?" cried Mitya, greatly dismayed at this unexpected news.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p17">"Well, Timofey was saying they're all gentlefolk. Two from our
						
						town- who they are I can't say- and there are two others, strangers,
						
						maybe more besides. I didn't ask particularly. They've set to
						
						playing cards, so Timofey said."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p18">"Cards?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p19">"So, maybe they're not in bed if they're at cards. It's most
						
						likely not more than eleven."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p20">"Quicker, Andrey! Quicker!" Mitya cried again, nervously.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p21">"May I ask you something, sir?" said Andrey, after a pause.
						
						"Only I'm afraid of angering you, sir."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p22">"What is it?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p23">"Why, Fenya threw herself at your feet just now, and begged you
						
						not to harm her mistress, and someone else, too... so you see, sir-
						
						It's I am taking you there... forgive me, sir, it's my conscience...
						
						maybe it's stupid of me to speak of it-."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p24">Mitya suddenly seized him by the shoulders from behind.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p25">"Are you a driver?" he asked frantically.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p26">"Yes sir."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p27">"Then you know that one has to make way. What would you say to a
						
						driver who wouldn't make way for anyone, but would just drive on and
						
						crush people? No, a driver mustn't run over people. One can't run over
						
						a man. One can't spoil people's lives. And if you have spoilt a
						
						life- punish yourself.... If only you've spoilt, if only you've ruined
						
						anyone's life- punish yourself and go away."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p28">These phrases burst from Mitya almost hysterically. Though
						
						Andrey was surprised at him, he kept up the conversation.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p29">"That's right, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, you're quite right, one
						
						mustn't crush or torment a man, or any kind of creature, for every
						
						creature is created by God. Take a horse, for instance, for some
						
						folks, even among us drivers, drive anyhow. Nothing will restrain
						
						them, they just force it along."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p30">"To hell?" Mitya interrupted, and went off into his abrupt,
						
						short laugh. "Andrey, simple soul," he seized him by the shoulders
						
						again, "tell me, will Dmitri Fyodorovitch Karamazov go to hell, or
						
						not, what do you think?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p31">"I don't know, darling, it depends on you, for you are... you see,
						
						sir, when the Son of God was nailed on the Cross and died, He went
						
						straight down to hell from the Cross, and set free all sinners that
						
						were in agony. And the devil groaned, because he thought that he would
						
						get no more sinners in hell. And God said to him, then, 'Don't
						
						groan, for you shall have all the mighty of the earth, the rulers, the
						
						chief judges, and the rich men, and shall be filled up as you have
						
						been in all the ages till I come again.' Those were His very words..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p32">"A peasant legend! Capital! Whip up the left, Andrey!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p33">"So you see, sir, who it is hell's for," said Andrey, whipping
						
						up the left horse, "but you're like a little child... that's how we
						
						look on you... and though you're hasty-tempered, sir, yet God will
						
						forgive you for your kind heart."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p34">"And you, do you forgive me, Andrey?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p35">"What should I forgive you for, sir? You've never done me any
						
						harm."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p36">"No, for everyone, for everyone, you here alone, on the road, will
						
						you forgive me for everyone? Speak, simple peasant heart!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p37">"Oh, sir! I feel afraid of driving you, your talk is so strange."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p38">But Mitya did not hear. He was frantically praying and muttering
						
						to himself.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p39">"Lord, receive me, with all my lawlessness, and do not condemn me.
						
						Let me pass by Thy judgment... do not condemn me, for I have condemned
						
						myself, do not condemn me, for I love Thee, O Lord. I am a wretch, but
						
						I love Thee. If Thou sendest me to hell, I shall love Thee there,
						
						and from there I shall cry out that I love Thee for ever and
						
						ever.... But let me love to the end.... Here and now for just five
						
						hours... till the first light of Thy day... for I love the queen of my
						
						soul... I love her and I cannot help loving her. Thou seest my whole
						
						heart... I shall gallop up, I shall fall before her and say, 'You
						
						are right to pass on and leave me. Farewell and forget your
						
						victim... never fret yourself about me!'"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p40">"Mokroe!" cried Andrey, pointing ahead with his whip.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p41">Through the pale darkness of the night loomed a solid black mass
						
						of buildings, flung down, as it were, in the vast plain. The village
						
						of Mokroe numbered two thousand inhabitants, but at that hour all were
						
						asleep, and only here and there a few lights still twinkled.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p42">"Drive on, Andrey, I come!" Mitya exclaimed, feverishly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p43">"They're not asleep," said Andrey again, pointing with his whip to
						
						the Plastunovs' inn, which was at the entrance to the village. The six
						
						windows, looking on the street, were all brightly lighted up.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p44">"They're not asleep," Mitya repeated joyously. "Quicker, Andrey!
						
						Gallop! Drive up with a dash! Set the bells ringing! Let all know that
						
						I have come. I'm coming! I'm coming, too!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p45">Andrey lashed his exhausted team into a gallop, drove with a
						
						dash and pulled up his steaming, panting horses at the high flight
						
						of steps.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p46">Mitya jumped out of the cart just as the innkeeper, on his way
						
						to bed, peeped out from the steps curious to see who had arrived.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p47">"Trifon Borissovitch, is that you?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p48">The innkeeper bent down, looked intently, ran down the steps,
						
						and rushed up to the guest with obsequious delight.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p49">"Dmitri Fyodorovitch, your honour! Do I see you again?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p50">Trifon Borissovitch was a thick-set, healthy peasant, of middle
						
						height, with a rather fat face. His expression was severe and
						
						uncompromising, especially with the peasants of Mokroe, but he had the
						
						power of assuming the most obsequious countenance, when he had an
						
						inkling that it was to his interest. He dressed in Russian style, with
						
						a shirt buttoning down on one side, and a full-skirted coat. He had
						
						saved a good sum of money, but was for ever dreaming of improving
						
						his position. More than half the peasants were in his clutches,
						
						everyone in the neighbourhood was in debt to him. From the
						
						neighbouring landowners he bought and rented lands which were worked
						
						by the peasants, in payment of debts which they could never shake off.
						
						He was a widower, with four grown-up daughters. One of them was
						
						already a widow and lived in the inn with her two children, his
						
						grandchildren, and worked for him like a charwoman. Another of his
						
						daughters was married to a petty official, and in one of the rooms
						
						of the inn, on the wall could be seen, among the family photographs, a
						
						miniature photograph of this official in uniform and official
						
						epaulettes. The two younger daughters used to wear fashionable blue or
						
						green dresses, fitting tight at the back, and with trains a yard long,
						
						on Church holidays or when they went to pay visits. But next morning
						
						they would get up at dawn, as usual, sweep out the rooms with a
						
						birch-broom, empty the slops, and clean up after lodgers.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p51">In spite of the thousands of roubles he had saved, Trifon
						
						Borissovitch was very fond of emptying the pockets of a drunken guest,
						
						and remembering that not a month ago he had, in twenty-four hours,
						
						made two if not three hundred roubles out of Dmitri, when he had
						
						come on his escapade with Grushenka, he met him now with eager
						
						welcome, scenting his prey the moment Mitya drove up to the steps.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p52">"Dmitri Fyodorovitch, dear sir, we see you once more!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p53">"Stay, Trifon Borissovitch," began Mitya, "first and foremost,
						
						where is she?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p54">"Agrafena Alexandrovna?" The inn-keeper understood at once,
						
						looking sharply into Mitya's face. "She's here, too..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p55">"With whom? With whom?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p56">"Some strangers. One is an official gentleman, a Pole, to judge
						
						from his speech. He sent the horses for her from here; and there's
						
						another with him, a friend of his, or a fellow traveller, there's no
						
						telling. They're dressed like civilians."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p57">"Well, are they feasting? Have they money?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p58">"Poor sort of a feast! Nothing to boast of, Dmitri Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p59">"Nothing to boast of? And who are the others?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p60">"They're two gentlemen from the town.... They've come back from
						
						Tcherny, and are putting up here. One's quite a young gentleman, a
						
						relative of Mr. Miusov he must be, but I've forgotten his name...
						
						and I expect you know the other, too, a gentleman called Maximov. He's
						
						been on a pilgrimage, so he says, to the monastery in the town. He's
						
						travelling with this young relation of Mr. Miusov."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p61">"Is that all?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p62">"Stay, listen, Trifon Borissovitch. Tell me the chief thing:
						
						What of her? How is she?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p63">"Oh, she's only just come. She's sitting with them."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p64">"Is she cheerful? Is she laughing?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p65">"No, I think she's not laughing much. She's sitting quite dull.
						
						She's combing the young gentleman's hair."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p66">"The Pole- the officer?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p67">"He's not young, and he's not an officer, either. Not him, sir.
						
						It's the young gentleman that's Mr. Miusov's relation. I've
						
						forgotten his name."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p68">"Kalganov?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p69">"That's it, Kalganov!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p70">"All right. I'll see for myself. Are they playing cards?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p71">"They have been playing, but they've left off. They've been
						
						drinking tea, the official gentleman asked for liqueurs."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p72">"Stay, Trifon Borissovitch, stay, my good soul, I'll see for
						
						myself. Now answer one more question: are the gypsies here?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p73">"You can't have the gypsies now, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. The
						
						authorities have sent them away. But we've Jews that play the
						
						cymbals and the fiddle in the village, so one might send for them.
						
						They'd come."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p74">"Send for them. Certainly send for them!" cried Mitya. "And you
						
						can get the girls together as you did then, Marya especially,
						
						Stepanida, too, and Arina. Two hundred roubles for a chorus!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p75">"Oh, for a sum like that I can get all the village together,
						
						though by now they're asleep. Are the peasants here worth such
						
						kindness, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, or the girls either? To spend a sum
						
						like that on such coarseness and rudeness! What's the good of giving a
						
						peasant a cigar to smoke, the stinking ruffian! And the girls are
						
						all lousy. Besides, I'll get my daughters up for nothing, let alone
						
						a sum like that. They've only just gone to bed, I'll give them a
						
						kick and set them singing for you. You gave the peasants champagne
						
						to drink the other day, e-ech!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p76">For all his pretended compassion for Mitya, Trifon Borissovitch
						
						had hidden half a dozen bottles of champagne on that last occasion,
						
						and had picked up a hundred-rouble note under the table, and it had
						
						remained in his clutches.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p77">"Trifon Borissovitch, I sent more than one thousand flying last
						
						time I was here. Do you remember?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p78">"You did send it flying. I may well remember. You must have left
						
						three thousand behind you."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p79">"Well, I've come to do the same again, do you see?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p80">And he pulled out his roll of notes, and held them up before the
						
						innkeeper's nose.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p81">Now, listen and remember. In an hour's time the wine will
						
						arrive, savouries, pies, and sweets- bring them all up at once. That
						
						box Andrey has got is to be brought up at once, too. Open it, and hand
						
						champagne immediately. And the girls, we must have the girls, Marya
						
						especially."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p82">He turned to the cart and pulled out the box of pistols.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p83">"Here, Andrey, let's settle. Here's fifteen roubles for the drive,
						
						and fifty for vodka... for your readiness, for your love....
						
						Remember Karamazov!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p84">"I'm afraid, sir," Andrey. "Give me five roubles extra, but more I
						
						won't take. Trifon Borissovitch, bear witness. Forgive my foolish
						
						words..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p85">"What are you afraid of?" asked Mitya, scanning him. "Well, go
						
						to the devil, if that's it?" he cried, flinging him five roubles.
						
						"Now, Trifon Borissovitch, take me up quietly and let me first get a
						
						look at them, so that they don't see me. Where are they? In the blue
						
						room?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p86">Trifon Borissovitch looked apprehensively at Mitya, but at once
						
						obediently did his bidding. Leading him into the passage, he went
						
						himself into the first large room, adjoining that in which the
						
						visitors were sitting, and took the light away. Then he stealthily led
						
						Mitya in, and put him in a corner in the dark, whence he could
						
						freely watch the company without being seen. But Mitya did not look
						
						long, and, indeed, he could not see them; he saw her, his heart
						
						throbbed violently, and all was dark before his eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p87">She was sitting sideways to the table in a low chair, and beside
						
						her, on the sofa, was the pretty youth, Kalganov. She was holding
						
						his hand and seemed to be laughing, while he, seeming vexed and not
						
						looking at her, was saying something in a loud voice to Maximov, who
						
						sat the other side of the table, facing Grushenka. Maximov was
						
						laughing violently at something. On the sofa sat he, and on a chair by
						
						the sofa there was another stranger. The one on the sofa was lolling
						
						backwards, smoking a pipe, and Mitya had an impression of a
						
						stoutish, broad-faced, short little man, who was apparently angry
						
						about something. His friend, the other stranger, struck Mitya as
						
						extraordinarily tall, but he could make out nothing more. He caught
						
						his breath. He could not bear it for a minute, he put the
						
						pistol-case on a chest, and with a throbbing heart he walked,
						
						feeling cold all over, straight into the blue room to face the
						
						company.
						
							</p><p id="vi_4-p88">"Aie!" shrieked Grushenka, the first to notice him.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - The First and Rightful Lover" prev="vi_4" next="viii_2" id="vii_4">
					
							<p id="vii_4-p1">WITH his long, rapid strides, Mitya walked straight up to the
						
						table.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p2">"Gentlemen," he said in a loud voice, almost shouting, yet
						
						stammering at every word, "I... I'm all right! Don't be afraid!" he
						
						exclaimed, "I- there's nothing the matter," he turned suddenly to
						
						Grushenka, who had shrunk back in her chair towards Kalganov, and
						
						clasped his hand tightly. "I... I'm coming, too. I'm here till
						
						morning. Gentlemen, may I stay with you till morning? Only till
						
						morning, for the last time, in this same room?"
						
							So he finished, turning to the fat little man, with the pipe,
						
						sitting on the sofa. The latter removed his pipe from his lips with
						
						dignity and observed severely:
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p3">"Panie,* we're here in private. There are other rooms."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p4">* Pan and Panie mean Mr. in Polish. Pani means Mrs., Panovie,
						
						gentlemen.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p5">"Why, it's you, Dmitri Fyodorovitch! What do you mean?" answered
						
						Kalgonov suddenly. "Sit down with us. How are you?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p6">"Delighted to see you, dear... and precious fellow, I always
						
						thought a lot of you." Mitya responded, joyfully and eagerly, at
						
						once holding out his hand across the table.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p7">"Aie! How tight you squeeze! You've quite broken my fingers,"
						
						laughed Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p8">"He always squeezes like that, always," Grushenka put in gaily,
						
						with a timid smile, seeming suddenly convinced from Mitya's face
						
						that he was not going to make a scene. She was watching him with
						
						intense curiosity and still some uneasiness. She was impressed by
						
						something about him, and indeed the last thing she expected of him was
						
						that he would come in and speak like this at such a moment.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p9">"Good evening," Maximov ventured blandly on the left. Mitya rushed
						
						up to him, too.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p10">"Good evening. You're here, too! How glad I am to find you here,
						
						too! Gentlemen, gentlemen, I- " (He addressed the Polish gentleman
						
						with the pipe again, evidently taking him for the most important
						
						person present.) "I flew here.... I wanted to spend my last day, my
						
						last hour in this room, in this very room ... where I, too,
						
						adored... my queen.... Forgive me, Panie," he cried wildly, "I flew
						
						here and vowed- Oh, don't be afraid, it's my last night! Let's drink
						
						to our good understanding. They'll bring the wine at once.... I
						
						brought this with me." (Something made him pull out his bundle of
						
						notes.) "Allow me, panie! I want to have music, singing, a revel, as
						
						we had before. But the worm, the unnecessary worm, will crawl away,
						
						and there'll be no more of him. I will commemorate my day of joy on my
						
						last night."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p11">He was almost choking. There was so much, so much he wanted to
						
						say, but strange exclamations were all that came from his lips. The
						
						Pole gazed fixedly at him, at the bundle of notes in his hand;
						
						looked at Grushenka, and was in evident perplexity.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p12">"If my suverin lady is permitting- " he was beginning.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p13">"What does 'suverin' mean? 'Sovereign,' I suppose?" interrupted
						
						Grushenka. "I can't help laughing at you, the way you talk. Sit
						
						down, Mitya, what are you talking about? Don't frighten us, please.
						
						You won't frighten us, will you? If you won't, I am glad to see
						
						you..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p14">"Me, me frighten you?" cried Mitya, flinging up his hands. "Oh,
						
						pass me by, go your way, I won't hinder you!..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p15">And suddenly he surprised them all, and no doubt himself as
						
						well, by flinging himself on a chair, and bursting into tears, turning
						
						his head away to the opposite wall, while his arms clasped the back of
						
						the chair tight, as though embracing it.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p16">"Come, come, what a fellow you are!" cried Grushenka
						
						reproachfully. "That's just how he comes to see me- he begins talking,
						
						and I can't make out what he means. He cried like that once before,
						
						and now he's crying again! It's shamefull Why are you crying? As
						
						though you had anything to cry for!" she added enigmatically,
						
						emphasising each word with some irritability.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p17">"I... I'm not crying.... Well, good evening!" He instantly
						
						turned round in his chair, and suddenly laughed, not his abrupt wooden
						
						laugh, but a long, quivering, inaudible nervous laugh.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p18">"Well, there you are again.... Come, cheer up, cheer up!"
						
						Grushenka said to him persuasively. "I'm very glad you've come, very
						
						glad, Mitya, do you hear, I'm very glad! I want him to stay here
						
						with us," she said peremptorily, addressing the whole company,
						
						though her words were obviously meant for the man sitting on the sofa.
						
						"I wish it, I wish it! And if he goes away I shall go, too!" she added
						
						with flashing eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p19">"What my queen commands is law!" pronounced the Pole, gallantly
						
						kissing Grushenka's hand. "I beg you, panie, to join our company,"
						
						he added politely, addressing Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p20">Mitya was jumping up with the obvious intention of delivering
						
						another tirade, but the words did not come.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p21">"Let's drink, Panie," he blurted out instead of making a speech.
						
						Everyone laughed.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p22">"Good heavens! I thought he was going to begin again!" Grushenka
						
						exclaimed nervously. "Do you hear, Mitya," she went on insistently,
						
						"don't prance about, but it's nice you've brought the champagne. I
						
						want some myself, and I can't bear liqueurs. And best of all, you've
						
						come yourself. We were fearfully dull here.... You've come for a spree
						
						again, I suppose? But put your money in your pocket. Where did you get
						
						such a lot?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p23">Mitya had been, all this time, holding in his hand the crumpled
						
						bundle of notes on which the eyes of all, especially of the Poles,
						
						were fixed. In confusion he thrust them hurriedly into his pocket.
						
						He flushed. At that moment the innkeeper brought in an uncorked bottle
						
						of champagne, and glasses on a tray. Mitya snatched up the bottle, but
						
						he was so bewildered that he did not know what to do with it. Kalgonov
						
						took it from him and poured out the champagne.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p24">"Another! Another bottle!" Mitya cried to the inn-keeper, and,
						
						forgetting to clink glasses with the Pole whom he had so solemnly
						
						invited to drink to their good understanding, he drank off his glass
						
						without waiting for anyone else. His whole countenance suddenly
						
						changed. The solemn and tragic expression with which he had entered
						
						vanished completely, and a look of something childlike came into his
						
						face. He seemed to have become suddenly gentle and subdued. He
						
						looked shyly and happily at everyone, with a continual nervous
						
						little laugh, and the blissful expression of a dog who has done wrong,
						
						been punished, and forgiven. He seemed to have forgotten everything,
						
						and was looking round at everyone with a childlike smile of delight.
						
						He looked at Grushenka, laughing continually, and bringing his chair
						
						close up to her. By degrees he had gained some idea of the two
						
						Poles, though he had formed no definite conception of them yet.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p25">The Pole on the sofa struck him by his dignified demeanour and his
						
						Polish accent; and, above all, by his pipe. "Well, what of it? It's
						
						a good thing he's smoking a pipe," he reflected. The Pole's puffy,
						
						middle-aged face, with its tiny nose and two very thin, pointed,
						
						dyed and impudent-looking moustaches, had not so far roused the
						
						faintest doubts in Mitya. He was not even particularly struck by the
						
						Pole's absurd wig made in Siberia, with love-locks foolishly combed
						
						forward over the temples. "I suppose it's all right since he wears a
						
						wig," he went on, musing blissfully. The other, younger Pole, who
						
						was staring insolently and defiantly at the company and listening to
						
						the conversation with silent contempt, still only impressed Mitya by
						
						his great height, which was in striking contrast to the Pole on the
						
						sofa. "If he stood up he'd be six foot three." The thought flitted
						
						through Mitya's mind. It occurred to him, too, that this Pole must
						
						be the friend of the other, as it were, a "bodyguard," and no doubt
						
						the big Pole was at the disposal of the little Pole with the pipe. But
						
						this all seemed to Mitya perfectly right and not to be questioned.
						
						In his mood of doglike submissiveness all feeling of rivalry had
						
						died away.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p26">Grushenka's mood and the enigmatic tone of some of her words he
						
						completely failed to grasp. All he understood, with thrilling heart,
						
						was that she was kind to him, that she had forgiven him, and made
						
						him sit by her. He was beside himself with delight, watching her sip
						
						her glass of champagne. The silence of the company seemed somehow to
						
						strike him, however, and he looked round at everyone with expectant
						
						eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p27">"Why are we sitting here though, gentlemen? Why don't you begin
						
						doing something?" his smiling eyes seemed to ask.
						
							"He keeps talking nonsense, and we were all laughing," Kalgonov
						
						began suddenly, as though divining his thought, and pointing to
						
						Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p28">Mitya immediately stared at Kalgonov and then at Maximov
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p29">"He's talking nonsense?" he laughed, his short, wooden laugh,
						
						seeming suddenly delighted at something- "ha ha!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p30">"Yes. Would you believe it, he will have it that all our cavalry
						
						officers in the twenties married Polish women. That's awful rot, isn't
						
						it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p31">"Polish women?" repeated Mitya, perfectly ecstatic.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p32">Kalgonov was well aware of Mitya's attitude to Grushenka, and he
						
						guessed about the Pole, too, but that did not so much interest him,
						
						perhaps did not interest him at all; what he was interested in was
						
						Maximov. He had come here with Maximov by chance, and he met the Poles
						
						here at the inn for the first time in his life. Grushenka he knew
						
						before, and had once been with someone to see her; but she had not
						
						taken to him. But here she looked at him very affectionately: before
						
						Mitya's arrival, she had been making much of him, but he seemed
						
						somehow to be unmoved by it. He was a boy, not over twenty, dressed
						
						like a dandy, with a very charming fair-skinned face, and splendid
						
						thick, fair hair. From his fair face looked out beautiful pale blue
						
						eyes, with an intelligent and sometimes even deep expression, beyond
						
						his age indeed, although the young man sometimes looked and talked
						
						quite like a child, and was not at all ashamed of it, even when he was
						
						aware of it himself. As a rule he was very wilful, even capricious,
						
						though always friendly. Sometimes there was something fixed and
						
						obstinate in his expression. He would look at you and listen,
						
						seeming all the while to be persistently dreaming over something else.
						
						Often he was listless and lazy; at other times he would grow
						
						excited, sometimes, apparently, over the most trivial matters.
						
							"Only imagine, I've been taking him about with me for the last
						
						four days," he went on, indolently drawling his words, quite naturally
						
						though, without the slightest affectation. "Ever since your brother,
						
						do you remember, shoved him off the carriage and sent him flying. That
						
						made me take an interest in him at the time, and I took him into the
						
						country, but he keeps talking such rot I'm ashamed to be with him. I'm
						
						taking him back."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p33">"The gentleman has not seen Polish ladies, and says what is
						
						impossible," the Pole with the pipe observed to Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p34">He spoke Russian fairly well, much better, anyway, than he
						
						pretended. If he used Russian words, he always distorted them into a
						
						Polish form.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p35">"But I was married to a Polish lady myself," tittered Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p36">"But did you serve in the cavalry? You were talking about the
						
						cavalry. Were you a cavalry officer?" put in Kalgonov at once.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p37">"Was he a cavalry officer indeed? Ha ha!" cried Mitya, listening
						
						eagerly, and turning his inquiring eyes to each as he spoke, as though
						
						there were no knowing what he might hear from each.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p38">"No, you see," Maximov turned to him. "What I mean is that those
						
						pretty Polish ladies ... when they danced the mazurka with our
						
						Uhlans... when one of them dances a mazurka with a Uhlan she jumps
						
						on his knee like a kitten... a little white one... and the
						
						pan-father and pan-mother look on and allow it... They allow it... and
						
						next day the Uhlan comes and offers her his hand.... That's how it
						
						is... offers her his hand, he he!" Maximov ended, tittering.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p39">"The pan is a lajdak!"* the tall Pole on the chair growled
						
						suddenly and crossed one leg over the other. Mitya's eye was caught by
						
						his huge greased boot, with its thick, dirty sole. The dress of both
						
						the Poles looked rather greasy.</p><p id="vii_4-p40" /><p id="vii_4-p41">
						
						
						
							* Scoundrel.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p42" /><p id="vii_4-p43">"Well, now it's lajdak! What's he scolding about?" said Grushenka,
						
						suddenly vexed.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p44">"Pani Agrippina, what the gentleman saw in Poland were servant
						
						girls, and not ladies of good birth," the Pole with the pipe
						
						observed to Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p45">"You can reckon on that," the tall Pole snapped contemptuously.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p46">"What next! Let him talk! People talk, why hinder them? It makes
						
						it cheerful," Grushenka said crossly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p47">"I'm not hindering them, pani," said the Pole in the wig, with a
						
						long look at Grushenka, and relapsing into dignified silence he sucked
						
						his pipe again.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p48">"No, no. The Polish gentleman spoke the truth." Kalgonov got
						
						excited again, as though it were a question of vast import. "He's
						
						never been in Poland, so how can he talk about it? I suppose you
						
						weren't married in Poland, were you?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p49">"No, in the Province of Smolensk. Only, a Uhlan had brought her to
						
						Russia before that, my future wife, with her mamma and her aunt, and
						
						another female relation with a grown-up son. He brought her straight
						
						from Poland and gave her up to me. He was a lieutenant in our
						
						regiment, a very nice young man. At first he meant to marry her
						
						himself. But he didn't marry her, because she turned out to be lame."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p50">"So you married a lame woman?" cried Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p51">"Yes. They both deceived me a little bit at the time, and
						
						concealed it. I thought she was hopping; she kept hopping.... I
						
						thought it was for fun."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p52">"So pleased she was going to marry you!" yelled Kalganov, in a
						
						ringing, childish voice.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p53">"Yes, so pleased. But it turned out to be quite a different cause.
						
						Afterwards, when we were married, after the wedding, that very
						
						evening, she confessed, and very touchingly asked forgiveness. 'I once
						
						jumped over a puddle when I was a child,' she said, 'and injured my
						
						leg.' He he!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p54">Kalgonov went off into the most childish laughter, almost
						
						falling on the sofa. Grushenka, too, laughed. Mitya was at the
						
						pinnacle of happiness.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p55">"Do you know, that's the truth, he's not lying now," exclaimed
						
						Kalganov, turning to Mitya; "and do you know, he's been married twice;
						
						it's his first wife he's talking about. But his second wife, do you
						
						know, ran away, and is alive now."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p56">"Is it possible?" said Mitya, turning quickly to Maximov with an
						
						expression of the utmost astonishment.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p57">"Yes. She did run away. I've had that unpleasant experience,"
						
						Maximov modestly assented, "with a monsieur. And what was worse, she'd
						
						had all my little property transferred to her beforehand. 'You're an
						
						educated man,' she said to me. 'You can always get your living.' She
						
						settled my business with that. A venerable bishop once said to me:
						
						'One of your wives was lame, but the other was too light-footed.' He
						
						he!
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p58">"Listen, listen!" cried Kalganov, bubbling over, "if he's
						
						telling lies- and he often is- he's only doing it to amuse us all.
						
						There's no harm in that, is there? You know, I sometimes like him.
						
						He's awfully low, but it's natural to him, eh? Don't you think so?
						
						Some people are low from self-interest, but he's simply so, from
						
						nature. Only fancy, he claims (he was arguing about it all the way
						
						yesterday) that Gogol wrote Dead Souls about him. Do you remember,
						
						there's a landowner called Maximov in it, whom Nozdryov thrashed. He
						
						was charged, do you remember, 'for inflicting bodily injury with
						
						rods on the landowner Maximov in a drunken condition.' Would you
						
						believe it, he claims that he was that Maximov and that he was beaten!
						
						Now can it be so? Tchitchikov made his journey, at the very latest, at
						
						the beginning of the twenties, so that the dates don't fit. He
						
						couldn't have been thrashed then, he couldn't, could he?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p59">It was diffcult to imagine what Kalgonov was excited about, but
						
						his excitement was genuine. Mitya followed his lead without protest.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p60">"Well, but if they did thrash him!" he cried, laughing.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p61">"It's not that they thrashed me exactly, but what I mean is- " put
						
						in Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p62">"What do you mean? Either they thrashed you or they didn't."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p63">"What o'clock is it, panie?" the Pole, with the pipe, asked his
						
						tall friend, with a bored expression. The other shrugged his shoulders
						
						in reply. Neither of them had a watch.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p64">"Why not talk? Let other people talk. Mustn't other people talk
						
						because you're bored?" Grushenka flew at him with evident intention of
						
						finding fault. Something seemed for the first time to flash upon
						
						Mitya's mind. This time the Pole answered with unmistakable
						
						irritability.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p65">"Pani, I didn't oppose it. I didn't say anything."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p66">"All right then. Come, tell us your story," Grushenka cried to
						
						Maximov. "Why are you all silent?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p67">"There's nothing to tell, it's all so foolish," answered Maximov
						
						at once, with evident satisfaction, mincing a little. "Besides, all
						
						that's by way of allegory in Gogol, for he's made all the names have a
						
						meaning. Nozdryov was really called Nosov, and Kuvshinikov had quite a
						
						different name, he was called Shkvornev. Fenardi really was called
						
						Fenardi, only he wasn't an Italian but a Russian, and Mamsel Fenardi
						
						was a pretty girl with her pretty little legs in tights, and she had a
						
						little short skirt with spangles, and she kept turning round and
						
						round, only not for four hours but for four minutes only, and she
						
						bewitched everyone..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p68">"But what were you beaten for?" cried Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p69">"For Piron!" answered Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p70">"What Piron?" cried Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p71">"The famous French writer, Piron. We were all drinking then, a big
						
						party of us, in a tavern at that very fair. They'd invited me, and
						
						first of all I began quoting epigrams. 'Is that you, Boileau? What a
						
						funny get-up!' and Boileau answers that he's going to a masquerade,
						
						that is to the baths, he he! And they took it to themselves, so I made
						
						haste to repeat another, very sarcastic, well known to all educated
						
						people:</p><p id="vii_4-p72" /><p id="vii_4-p73">
						
						
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p74">                   Yes, Sappho and Phaon are we!
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p75">                   But one grief is weighing on me.
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p76">                   You don't know your way to the sea!
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p77">"They were still more offended and began abusing me in the most
						
						unseemly way for it. And as ill-luck would have it, to set things
						
						right, I began telling a very cultivated anecdote about Piron, how
						
						he was not accepted into the French Academy, and to revenge himself
						
						wrote his own epitaph:</p><p id="vii_4-p78" /><p id="vii_4-p79">
						
						
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p80">                   Ci-git Piron qui ne fut rien,
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p81">                   Pas meme academicien,*
						
						
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p82" /><p id="vii_4-p83">    * Here lies Piron, who was nothing, not even an Academician.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p84">They seized me and thrashed me."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p85">"But what for? What for?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p86">"For my education. People can thrash a man for anything,"
						
						Maximov concluded, briefly and sententiously.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p87">"Eh, that's enough! That's all stupid, I don't want to listen. I
						
						thought it would be amusing," Grushenka cut them short, suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p88">Mitya started, and at once left off laughing. The tall Pole rose
						
						upon his feet, and with the haughty air of a man, bored and out of his
						
						element, began pacing from corner to corner of the room, his hands
						
						behind his back.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p89">"Ah, he can't sit still," said Grushenka, looking at him
						
						contemptuously. Mitya began to feel anxious. He noticed besides,
						
						that the Pole on the sofa was looking at him with an irritable
						
						expression.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p90">"Panie!" cried Mitya, "Let's drink! and the other pan, too! Let us
						
						drink."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p91">In a flash he had pulled three glasses towards him, and filled
						
						them with champagne.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p92">"To Poland, Panovie, I drink to your Poland!" cried Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p93">"I shall be delighted, panie," said the Pole on the sofa, with
						
						dignity and affable condescension, and he took his glass.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p94">"And the other pan, what's his name? Drink, most illustrious, take
						
						your glass!" Mitya urged.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p95">"Pan Vrublevsky," put in the Pole on the sofa.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p96">Pan Vrublevsky came up to the table, swaying as he walked.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p97">"To Poland, Panovie!" cried Mitya, raisin, his glass. "Hurrah!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p98">All three drank. Mitya seized the bottle and again poured out
						
						three glasses.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p99">"Now to Russia, Panovie, and let us be brothers!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p100">"Pour out some for us," said Grushenka; "I'll drink to Russia,
						
						too!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p101">"So will I," said Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p102">"And I would, too... to Russia, the old grandmother!" tittered
						
						Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p103">"All! All!" cried Mitya. "Trifon Borissovitch, some more bottles!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p104">The other three bottles Mitya had brought with him were put on the
						
						table. Mitya filled the glasses.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p105">"To Russia! Hurrah!" he shouted again. All drank the toast
						
						except the Poles, and Grushenka tossed off her whole glass at once.
						
						The Poles did not touch theirs.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p106">"How's this, Panovie?" cried Mitya, "won't you drink it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p107">Pan Vrublevsky took the glass, raised it and said with a
						
						resonant voice:
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p108">"To Russia as she was before 1772."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p109">"Come, that's better!" cried the other Pole, and they both emptied
						
						their glasses at once.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p110">"You're fools, you Panovie," broke suddenly from Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p111">"Panie!" shouted both the Poles, menacingly, setting on Mitya like
						
						a couple of cocks. Pan Vrublevsky was specially furious.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p112">"Can one help loving one's own country?" he shouted.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p113">"Be silent! Don't quarrel! I won't have any quarrelling!" cried
						
						Grushenka imperiously, and she stamped her foot on the floor. Her face
						
						glowed, her eyes were shining. The effects of the glass she had just
						
						drunk were apparent. Mitya was terribly alarmed.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p114">"Panovie, forgive me! It was my fault, I'm sorry. Vrublevsky,
						
						panie Vrublevsky, I'm sorry."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p115">"Hold your tongue, you, anyway! Sit down, you stupid!".
						
						Grushenka scolded with angry annoyance.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p116">Everyone sat down, all were silent, looking at one another.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p117">"Gentlemen, I was the cause of it all," Mitya began again,
						
						unable to make anything of Grushenka's words. "Come, why are we
						
						sitting here? What shall we do... to amuse ourselves again?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p118">"Ach, it's certainly anything but amusing!" Kalgonov mumbled
						
						lazily.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p119">"Let's play faro again, as we did just now," Maximov tittered
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p120">"Faro? Splendid!" cried Mitya. "If only the panovie-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p121">"It's lite, panovie," the Pole on the sofa responded, as it were
						
						unwillingly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p122">"That's true," assented Pan Vrublevsky.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p123">"Lite? What do you mean by 'lite'?" asked Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p124">"Late, pani! 'A late hour' I mean," the Pole on the sofa
						
						explained.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p125">"It's always late with them. They can never do anything!"
						
						Grushenka almost shrieked in her anger. "They're dull themselves, so
						
						they want others to be dull. Before came, Mitya, they were just as
						
						silent and kept turning up their noses at me."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p126">"My goddess!" cried the Pole on the sofa, "I see you're not
						
						well-disposed to me, that's why I'm gloomy. I'm ready, panie," added
						
						he, addressing Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p127">"Begin, panie," Mitya assented, pulling his notes out of his
						
						pocket, and laying two hundred-rouble notes on the table. "I want to
						
						lose a lot to you. Take your cards. Make the bank."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p128">"We'll have cards from the landlord, panie," said the little Pole,
						
						gravely and emphatically.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p129">"That's much the best way," chimed in Pan Vrublevsky.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p130">"From the landlord? Very good, I understand, let's get them from
						
						him. Cards!" Mitya shouted to the landlord.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p131">The landlord brought in a new, unopened pack, and informed Mitya
						
						that the girls were getting ready, and that the Jews with the
						
						cymbals would most likely be here soon; but the cart with the
						
						provisions had not yet arrived. Mitya jumped up from the table and ran
						
						into the next room to give orders, but only three girls had arrived,
						
						and Marya was not there yet. And he did not know himself what orders
						
						to give and why he had run out. He only told them to take out of the
						
						box the presents for the girls, the sweets, the toffee and the
						
						fondants. "And vodka for Andrey, vodka for Andrey!" he cried in haste.
						
						"I was rude to Andrey!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p132">Suddenly Maximov, who had followed him out, touched him on the
						
						shoulder.
						
							"</p><p id="vii_4-p133">Give me five roubles," he whispered to Mitya. "I'll stake
						
						something at faro, too, he he!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p134">"Capital! Splendid! Take ten, here!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p135">Again he took all the notes out of his pocket and picked out one
						
						for ten roubles. "And if you lose that, come again, come again."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p136">"Very good," Maximov whispered joyfully, and he ran back again.
						
						Mitya, too, returned, apologising for having kept them waiting. The
						
						Poles had already sat down, and opened the pack. They looked much more
						
						amiable, almost cordial. The Pole on the sofa had lighted another pipe
						
						and was preparing to throw. He wore an air of solemnity.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p137">"To your places, gentlemen," cried Pan Vrublevsky.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p138">"No, I'm not going to play any more," observed Kalganov, "I've
						
						lost fifty roubles to them just now."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p139">"The pan had no luck, perhaps he'll be lucky this time," the
						
						Pole on the sofa observed in his direction.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p140">"How much in the bank? To correspond?" asked Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p141">"That's according, panie, maybe a hundred, maybe two hundred, as
						
						much as you will stake."
						
						</p><p id="vii_4-p142">"A million!" laughed Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p143">"The Pan Captain has heard of Pan Podvysotsky, perhaps?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p144">"What Podvysotsky?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p145">"In Warsaw there was a bank and anyone comes and stakes against
						
						it. Podvysotsky comes, sees a thousand gold pieces, stakes against the
						
						bank. The banker says, 'Panie Podvysotsky, are you laying down the
						
						gold, or must we trust to your honour?' 'To my honour, panie,' says
						
						Podvysotsky. 'So much the better.' The banker throws the dice.
						
						Podvysotsky wins. 'Take it, panie,' says the banker, and pulling out
						
						the drawer he gives him a million. 'Take it, panie, this is your
						
						gain.' There was a million in the bank. 'I didn't know that,' says
						
						Podvysotsky. 'Panie Podvysotsky,' said the banker, 'you pledged your
						
						honour and we pledged ours.' Podvysotsky took the million."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p146">"That's not true," said Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p147">"Panie Kalganov, in gentlemanly society one doesn't say such
						
						things."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p148">"As if a Polish gambler would give away a million!" cried Mitya,
						
						but checked himself at once. "Forgive me, panie, it's my fault
						
						again; he would, he would give away a million, for honour, for
						
						Polish honour. You see how I talk Polish, ha ha! Here, I stake ten
						
						roubles, the knave leads."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p149">"And I put a rouble on the queen, the queen of hearts, the
						
						pretty little panienotchka* he! he!" laughed Maximov, pulling out
						
						his queen, and, as though trying to conceal it from everyone, he moved
						
						right up and crossed himself hurriedly under the table. Mitya won. The
						
						rouble won, too.</p><p id="vii_4-p150" /><p id="vii_4-p151">
						
						
						
							* Little miss.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p152" /><p id="vii_4-p153">"A corner!" cried Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p154">"I'll bet another rouble, a 'single' stake," Maximov muttered
						
						gleefully, hugely delighted at having won a rouble.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p155">"Lost!" shouted Mitya. "A 'double' on the seven!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p156">The seven too was trumped.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p157">"Stop!" cried Kalganov suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p158">"Double! Double!" Mitya doubled his stakes, and each time he
						
						doubled the stake, the card he doubled was trumped by the Poles. The
						
						rouble stakes kept winning.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p159">"On the double!" shouted Mitya furiously.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p160">"You've lost two hundred, panie. Will you stake another
						
						hundred?" the Pole on the sofa inquired.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p161">"What? Lost two hundred already? Then another two hundred! All
						
						doubles!" And pulling his money out of his pocket, Mitya was about
						
						to fling two hundred roubles on the queen, but Kalgonov covered it
						
						with his hand.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p162">"That's enough!" he shouted in his ringing voice.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p163">"What's the matter?" Mitya stared at him.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p164">"That's enough! I don't want you to play anymore. Don't!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p165">"Why?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p166">"Because I don't. Hang it, come away. That's why. I won't let
						
						you go on playing."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p167">Mitya gazed at him in astonishment.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p168">"Give it up, Mitya. He may be right. You've lost a lot as it
						
						is," said Grushenka, with a curious note in her voice. Both the
						
						Poles rose from their seats with a deeply offended air.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p169">"Are you joking, panie?" said the short man, looking severely at
						
						Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p170">"How dare you!" Pan Vrublevsky, too, growled at Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p171">"Don't dare to shout like that," cried Grushenka. "Ah, you
						
						turkey-cocks!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p172">Mitya looked at each of them in turn. But something in Grushenka's
						
						face suddenly struck him, and at the same instant something new
						
						flashed into his mind- a strange new thought!
						
						   "Pani Agrippina," the little Pole was beginning, crimson with
						
						anger, when Mitya suddenly went up to him and slapped him on the
						
						shoulder.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p173">"Most illustrious, two words with you."cried Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p174">"What do you want?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p175">"In the next room, I've two words to say to you, something
						
						pleasant, very pleasant. You'll be glad to hear it."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p176">The little pan was taken aback and looked apprehensively at Mitya.
						
						He agreed at once, however, on condition that Pan Vrublevsky went with
						
						them.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p177">"The bodyguard? Let him come, and I want him, too. I must have
						
						him!" cried Mitya. "March, panovie!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p178">"Where are you going?" asked Grushenka, anxiously.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p179">"We'll be back in one moment," answered Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p180">There was a sort of boldness, a sudden confidence shining in his
						
						eyes. His face had looked very different when he entered the room an
						
						hour before.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p181">He led the Poles, not into the large room where the chorus of
						
						girls was assembling and the table was being laid, but into the
						
						bedroom on the right, where the trunks and packages were kept, and
						
						there were two large beds, with pyramids of cotton pillows on each.
						
						There was a lighted candle on a small deal table in the corner. The
						
						small man and Mitya sat down to this table, facing each other, while
						
						the huge Vrublevsky stood beside them, his hands behind his back.
						
						The Poles looked severe but were evidently inquisitive.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p182">"What can I do for you, panie?" lisped the little Pole.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p183">"Well, look here, panie, I won't keep you long. There's money
						
						for you," he pulled out his notes. "Would you like three thousand?
						
						Take it and go your way."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p184">The Pole gazed open-eyed at Mitya, with a searching look.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p185">"Three thousand, panie?" He exchanged glances with Vrublevsky.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p186">"Three, panovie, three! Listen, panie, I see you're a sensible
						
						man. Take three thousand and go to the devil, and Vrublevsky with
						
						you d'you hear? But, at once, this very minute, and for ever. You
						
						understand that, panie, for ever. Here's the door, you go out of it.
						
						What have you got there, a great-coat, a fur coat? I'll bring it out
						
						to you. They'll get the horses out directly, and then-good-bye,
						
						panie!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p187">Mitya awaited an answer with assurance. He had no doubts. An
						
						expression of extraordinary resolution passed over the Pole's face.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p188">"And the money, panie?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p189">"The money, panie? Five hundred roubles I'll give you this
						
						moment for the journey, and as a first instalment, and two thousand
						
						five hundred to-morrow, in the town- I swear on my honour, I'll get
						
						it, I'll get it at any cost!" cried Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p190">The Poles exchanged glances again. The short man's face looked
						
						more forbidding.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p191">"Seven hundred, seven hundred, not five hundred, at once, this
						
						minute, cash down!" Mitya added, feeling something wrong. "What's
						
						the matter, panie? Don't you trust me? I can't give you the whole
						
						three thousand straight off. If I give it, you may come back to her
						
						to-morrow.... Besides, I haven't the three thousand with me. I've
						
						got it at home in the town," faltered Mitya, his spirit sinking at
						
						every word he uttered. "Upon my word, the money's there, hidden."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p192">In an instant an extraordinary sense of personal dignity showed
						
						itself in the little man's face.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p193">"What next?" he asked ironically. "For shame!" and he spat on
						
						the floor. Pan Vrublevsky spat too.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p194">"You do that, panie," said Mitya, recognising with despair that
						
						all was over, "because you hope to make more out of Grushenka?
						
						You're a couple of capons, that's what you are!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p195">"This is a mortal insult!" The little Pole turned as red as a
						
						crab, and he went out of the room, briskly, as though unwilling to
						
						hear another word. Vrublevsky swung out after him, and Mitya followed,
						
						confused and crestfallen. He was afraid of Grushenka, afraid that
						
						the Pan would at once raise an outcry. And so indeed he did. The
						
						Pole walked into the room and threw himself in a theatrical attitude
						
						before Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p196">"Pani Agrippina, I have received a mortal insult!" he exclaimed.
						
						But Grushenka suddenly lost all patience, as though they had wounded
						
						her in the tenderest spot.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p197">"Speak Russian! Speak Russian!" she cried, "not another word of
						
						Polish! You used to talk Russian. You can't have forgotten it in
						
						five years."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p198">She was red with passion.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p199">"Pani Agrippina-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p200">"My name's Agrafena, Grushenka, speak Russian or I won't listen!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p201">The Pole gasped with offended dignity, and quickly and pompously
						
						delivered himself in broken Russian:
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p202">"Pani Agrafena, I came here to forget the past and forgive it,
						
						to forget all that has happened till to-day-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p203">"Forgive? Came here to forgive me?" Grushenka cut him short,
						
						jumping up from her seat.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p204">"Just so, Pani, I'm not pusillanimous, I'm magnanimous. But I
						
						was astounded when I saw your lovers. Pan Mitya offered me three
						
						thousand, in the other room to depart. I spat in the pan's face."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p205">"What? He offered you money for me?" cried Grushenka,
						
						hysterically. "Is it true, Mitya? How dare you? Am I for sale?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p206">"Panie, panie!" yelled Mitya, "she's pure and shining, and I
						
						have never been her lover! That's a lie..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p207">"How dare you defend me to him?" shrieked Grushenka. "It wasn't
						
						virtue kept me pure, and it wasn't that I was afraid of Kuzma, but
						
						that I might hold up my head when I met him, and tell him he's a
						
						scoundrel. And he did actually refuse the money?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p208">"He took it! He took it!" cried Mitya; "only he wanted to get
						
						the whole three thousand at once, and I could only give him seven
						
						hundred straight off."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p209">"I see: he heard I had money, and came here to marry me!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p210">"Pani Agrippina!" cried the little Pole. "I'm- a knight, I'm- a
						
						nobleman, and not a lajdak. I came here to make you my wife and I find
						
						you a different woman, perverse and shameless."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p211">"Oh, go back where you came from! I'll tell them to turn you out
						
						and you'll be turned out," cried Grushenka, furious. "I've been a
						
						fool, a fool, to have been miserable these five years! And it wasn't
						
						for his sake, it was my anger made me miserable. And this isn't he
						
						at all! Was he like this? It might be his father! Where did you get
						
						your wig from? He was a falcon, but this is a gander. He used to laugh
						
						and sing to me.... And I've been crying for five years, damned fool,
						
						abject, shameless I was!
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p212">She sank back in her low chair and hid her face in her hands. At
						
						that instant the chorus of Mokroe began singing in the room on the
						
						left- a rollicking dance song.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p213">"A regular Sodom!" Vrublevsky roared suddenly. "Landlord, send the
						
						shameless hussies away!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p214">The landlord, who had been for some time past inquisitively
						
						peeping in at the door, hearing shouts and guessing that his guests
						
						were quarrelling, at once entered the room.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p215">"What are you shouting for? D'you want to split your throat?" he
						
						said, addressing Vrublevsky, with surprising rudeness.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p216">"Animal!" bellowed Pan Vrublevsky.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p217">"Animal? And what sort of cards were you playing with just now?
						
						I gave you a pack and you hid it. You played with marked cards! I
						
						could send you to Siberia for playing with false cards, d'you know
						
						that, for it's just the same as false banknotes...
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p218">And going up to the sofa he thrust his fingers between the sofa
						
						back and the cushion, and pulled out an unopened pack of cards.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p219">"Here's my pack unopened!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p220">He held it up and showed it to all in the room. "From where I
						
						stood I saw him slip my pack away, and put his in place of it-
						
						you're a cheat and not a gentleman!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p221">"And I twice saw the pan change a card!" cried Kalganov.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p222">"How shameful! How shameful!" exclaimed Grushenka, clasping her
						
						hands, and blushing for genuine shame. "Good Lord, he's come to that!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p223">"I thought so, too!" said Mitya. But before he had uttered the
						
						words, Vrublevsky, with a confused and infuriated face, shook his fist
						
						at Grushenka, shouting:
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p224">"You low harlot!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p225">Mitya flew at him at once, clutched him in both hands, lifted
						
						him in the air, and in one instant had carried him into the room on
						
						the right, from which they had just come.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p226">"I've laid him on the floor, there," he announced, returning at
						
						once, gasping with excitement. "He's struggling, the scoundrel! But he
						
						won't come back, no fear of that!..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p227">He closed one half of the folding doors, and holding the other
						
						ajar called out to the little Pole:
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p228">"Most illustrious, will you please to retire as well?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p229">"My dear Dmitri Fyodorovitch," said Trifon Borissovitch, "make
						
						them give you back the money you lost. It's as good as stolen from
						
						you."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p230">"I don't want my fifty roubles back," Kalgonov declared suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p231">"I don't want my two hundred, either," cried Mitya, "I wouldn't
						
						take it for anything! Let him keep it as a consolation."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p232">"Bravo, Mitya! You're a trump, Mitya!" cried Grushenka, and
						
						there was a note of fierce anger in the exclamation.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p233">The little pan, crimson with fury but still mindful of his
						
						dignity, was making for the door, but he stopped short and said
						
						suddenly, addressing Grushenka:
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p234">"Pani, if you want to come with me, come. If not, good-bye."
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p235">And swelling with indignation and importance he went to the
						
						door. This was a man of character: he had so good an opinion of
						
						himself that after all that had passed, he still expected that she
						
						would marry him. Mitya slammed the door after him.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p236">"Lock it," said Kalganov. But the key clicked on the other side,
						
						they had locked it from within.
						
							</p><p id="vii_4-p237">"That's capital!" exclaimed Grushenka relentlessly. "Serve them
						
						right!"</p>					
										
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 8 - Delirium" prev="vii_4" next="iii_11" id="viii_2">
					
						<p id="viii_2-p1">WHAT followed was almost an orgy, a feast to which all were
						
						welcome. Grushenka was the first to call for wine.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p2">"I want to drink. I want to be quite drunk, as we were before.
						
						Do you remember, Mitya, do you remember how we made friends here
						
						last time!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p3">Mitya himself was almost delirious, feeling that his happiness was
						
						at hand. But Grushenka was continually sending him away from her.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p4">"Go and enjoy yourself. Tell them to dance, to make merry, 'let
						
						the stove and cottage dance'; as we had it last time," she kept
						
						exclaiming. She was tremendously excited. And Mitya hastened to obey
						
						her. The chorus were in the next room. The room in which they had been
						
						sitting till that moment was too small, and was divided in two by
						
						cotton curtains, behind which was a huge bed with a puffy feather
						
						mattress and a pyramid of cotton pillows. In the four rooms for
						
						visitors there were beds. Grushenka settled herself just at the
						
						door. Mitya set an easy chair for her. She had sat in the same place
						
						to watch the dancing and singing "the time before," when they had made
						
						merry there. All the girls who had come had been there then; the
						
						Jewish band with fiddles and zithers had come, too, and at last the
						
						long expected cart had arrived with the wines and provisions.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p5">Mitya bustled about. All sorts of people began coming into the
						
						room to look on, peasants and their women, who had been roused from
						
						sleep and attracted by the hopes of another marvellous entertainment
						
						such as they had enjoyed a month before. Mitya remembered their faces,
						
						greeting and embracing everyone he knew. He uncorked bottles and
						
						poured out wine for everyone who presented himself. Only the girls
						
						were very eager for the champagne. The men preferred rum, brandy, and,
						
						above all, hot punch. Mitya had chocolate made for all the girls,
						
						and ordered that three samovars should be kept boiling all night to
						
						provide tea and punch for everyone to help himself.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p6">An absurd chaotic confusion followed, but Mitya was in his natural
						
						element, and the more foolish it became, the more his spirits rose. If
						
						the peasants had asked him for money at that moment, he would have
						
						pulled out his notes and given them away right and left. This was
						
						probably why the landlord, Trifon Borissovitch, kept hovering about
						
						Mitya to protect him. He seemed to have given up all idea of going
						
						to bed that night; but he drank little, only one glass of punch, and
						
						kept a sharp look-out on Mitya's interests after his own fashion. He
						
						intervened in the nick of time, civilly and obsequiously persuading
						
						Mitya not to give away "cigars and Rhine wine," and, above all,
						
						money to the peasants as he had done before. He was very indignant,
						
						too, at the peasant girls drinking liqueur, and eating sweets.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p7">"They're a lousy lot, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," he said. "I'd give
						
						them a kick, every one of them, and they'd take it as an honour-
						
						that's all they're worth!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p8">Mitya remembered Andrey again, and ordered punch to be sent out to
						
						him. "I was rude to him just now," he repeated with a sinking,
						
						softened voice. Kalgonov did to drink, and at first did not care for
						
						the girls singing; but after he had drunk a couple of glasses of
						
						champagne he became extraordinarily lively, strolling about the
						
						room, laughing and praising the music and the songs, admiring everyone
						
						and everything. Maximov, blissfully drunk, never left his side.
						
						Grushenka, too, was beginning to get drunk. Pointing to Kalganov,
						
						she said to Mitya:
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p9">"What a dear, charming boy he is!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p10">And Mitya, delighted, ran to kiss Kalgonov and Maximov. Oh,
						
						great were his hopes! She had said nothing yet, and seemed, indeed,
						
						purposely to refrain from speaking. But she looked at him from time to
						
						time with caressing and passionate eyes. At last she suddenly
						
						gripped his hand and drew him vigorously to her. She was sitting at
						
						the moment in the low chair by the door.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p11">"How was it you came just now, eh? Have you walked in!... I was
						
						frightened. So you wanted to give me up to him, did you? Did you
						
						really want to?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p12">"I didn't want to spoil your happiness!" Mitya faltered
						
						blissfully. But she did not need his answer.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p13">"Well, go and enjoy yourself..." she sent him away once more.
						
						"Don't cry, I'll call you back again."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p14">He would run away and she listened to the singing and looked at
						
						the dancing, though her eyes followed him wherever he went. But in
						
						another quarter of an hour she would call him once more and again he
						
						would run back to her.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p15">"Come, sit beside me, tell me, how did you hear about me, and my
						
						coming here yesterday? From whom did you first hear it?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p16">And Mitya began telling her all about it, disconnectedly,
						
						incoherently, feverishly. He spoke strangely, often frowning, and
						
						stopping abruptly.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p17">"What are you frowning at?" she asked.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p18">"Nothing.... I left a man ill there. I'd give ten years of my life
						
						for him to get well, to know he was all right!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p19">"Well, never mind him, if he's ill. So you meant to shoot yourself
						
						to-morrow! What a silly boy! What for? I like such reckless fellows as
						
						you," she lisped, with a rather halting tongue. "So you would go any
						
						length for me, eh? Did you really mean to shoot yourself to-morrow,
						
						you stupid? No, wait a little. To-morrow I may have something to say
						
						to you.... I won't say it to-day, but to-morrow. You'd like it to be
						
						to-day? No, I don't want to to-day. Come, go along now, go and amuse
						
						yourself."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p20">Once, however, she called him, as it were, puzzled and uneasy.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p21">"Why are you sad? I see you're sad.... Yes, I see it," she
						
						added, looking intently into his eyes. "Though you keep kissing the
						
						peasants and shouting, I see something. No, be merry. I'm merry; you
						
						be merry, too.... I love somebody here. Guess who it is. Ah, look,
						
						my boy has fallen asleep, poor dear, he's drunk."
						
							She meant Kalganov. He was, in fact, drunk, and had dropped asleep
						
						for a moment, sitting on the sofa. But he was not merely drowsy from
						
						drink; he felt suddenly dejected, or, as he said, "bored." He was
						
						intensely depressed by the girls' songs, which, as the drinking went
						
						on, gradually became coarse and more reckless. And the dances were
						
						as bad. Two girls dressed up as bears, and a lively girl, called
						
						Stepanida, with a stick in her hand, acted the part of keeper, and
						
						began to "show them."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p22">"Look alive, Marya, or you'll get the stick!
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p23">The bears rolled on the ground at last in the most unseemly
						
						fashion, amid roars of laughter from the closely-packed crowd of men
						
						and women.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p24">"Well, let them! Let them!" said Grushenka sententiously, with
						
						an ecstatic expression on her face. "When they do get a day to enjoy
						
						themselves; why shouldn't folks be happy?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p25">Kalgonov looked as though he had been besmirched with dirt.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p26">"It's swinish, all this peasant foolery," he murmured, moving
						
						away; "it's the game they play when it's light all night in summer."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p27">He particularly disliked one "new" song to a jaunty dance-tune. It
						
						described how a gentleman came and tried his luck with the girls, to
						
						see whether they would love him:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p28" /><p id="viii_2-p29">                 The master came to try the girls:
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p30">                 Would they love him, would they not?
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p31" /><p id="viii_2-p32">But the girls could not love the master:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p33" /><p id="viii_2-p34">                 He would beat me cruelly
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p35">                 And such love won't do for me.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p36" /><p id="viii_2-p37">Then a gypsy comes along and he, too, tries:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p38" /><p id="viii_2-p39">                 The gypsy came to try the girls:
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p40">                 Would they love him, would they not?
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p41" /><p id="viii_2-p42">But they couldn't love the gypsy either:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p43" /><p id="viii_2-p44">                 He would be a thief, I fear,
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p45">                 And would cause me many a tear.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p46" /><p id="viii_2-p47">And many more men come to try their luck, among them a soldier:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p48" /><p id="viii_2-p49">                 The soldier came to try the girls:
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p50">                 Would they love him, would they not?
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p51" /><p id="viii_2-p52">But the soldier is rejected with contempt, in two indecent
						
						lines, sung with absolute frankness and producing a furore in the
						
						audience. The song ends with a merchant:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p53" /><p id="viii_2-p54">                 The merchant came to try the girls:
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p55">                 Would they love him, would they not?
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p56" /><p id="viii_2-p57">And it appears that he wins their love because:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p58" /><p id="viii_2-p59">                 The merchant will make gold for me
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p60">                 And his queen I'll gladly be.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p61" /><p id="viii_2-p62">Kalgonov was positively indignant.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p63">"That's just a song of yesterday," he said aloud. "Who writes such
						
						things for them? They might just as well have had a railwayman or a
						
						Jew come to try his luck with the girls; they'd have carried all
						
						before them."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p64">And, almost as though it were a personal affront, he declared,
						
						on the spot, that he was bored, sat down on the sofa and immediately
						
						fell asleep. His pretty little face looked rather pale, as it fell
						
						back on the sofa cushion.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p65">"Look how pretty he is," said Grushenka, taking Mitya up to him.
						
						"I was combing his hair just now; his hair's like flax, and so
						
						thick..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p66">And, bending over him tenderly, she kissed his forehead.
						
						Kalgonov instantly opened his eyes, looked at her, stood up, and
						
						with the most anxious air inquired where was Maximov?
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p67">"So that's who it is you want." Grushenka laughed. "Stay with me a
						
						minute. Mitya, run and find his Maximov."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p68">Maximov, it appeared, could not tear himself away from the
						
						girls, only running away from time to time to pour himself out a glass
						
						of liqueur. He had drunk two cups of chocolate. His face was red,
						
						and his nose was crimson; his eyes were moist, and mawkishly
						
						sweet.He ran up and announced that he was going to dance the
						
						"sabotiere."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p69">"They taught me all those well-bred, aristocratic dances when I
						
						was little..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p70">"Go, go with him, Mitya, and I'll watch from here how he
						
						dances," said Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p71">"No, no, I'm coming to look on, too," exclaimed Kalganov, brushing
						
						aside in the most naive way Grushenka's offer to sit with him. They
						
						all went to look on. Maximov danced his dance. But it roused no
						
						great admiration in anyone but Mitya. It consisted of nothing but
						
						skipping and hopping, kicking the feet, and at every skip Maximov
						
						slapped the upturned sole of his foot. Kalgonov did not like it at
						
						all, but Mitya kissed the dancer.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p72">"Thanks. You're tired perhaps? What are you looking for here?
						
						Would you like some sweets? A cigar, perhaps?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p73">"A cigarette."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p74">"Don't you want a drink?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p75">"I'll just have a liqueur.... Have you any chocolates?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p76">"Yes, there's a heap of them on the table there. Choose one, my
						
						dear soul!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p77">"I like one with vanilla... for old people. He he!
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p78">"No, brother, we've none of that special sort."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p79">"I say," the old man bent down to whisper in Mitya's ear. "That
						
						girl there, little Marya, he he! How would it be if you were to help
						
						me make friends with her?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p80">"So that's what you're after! No, brother, that won't do!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p81">"I'd do no harm to anyone," Maximov muttered disconsolately.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p82">"Oh, all right, all right. They only come here to dance and
						
						sing, you know, brother. But damn it all, wait a bit!... Eat and drink
						
						and be merry, meanwhile. Don't you want money?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p83">"Later on, perhaps," smiled Maximov.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p84">"All right, all right..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p85">Mitya's head was burning. He went outside to the wooden balcony
						
						which ran round the whole building on the inner side, overlooking
						
						the courtyard. The fresh air revived him. He stood alone in a dark
						
						corner, and suddenly clutched his head in both hands. His scattered
						
						thoughts came together; his sensations blended into a whole and
						
						threw a sudden light into his mind. A fearful and terrible light!
						
						"If I'm to shoot myself, why not now?" passed through his mind. "Why
						
						not go for the pistols, bring them here, and here, in this dark
						
						dirty corner, make an end?" Almost a minute he undecided. A few
						
						hours earlier, when he had been dashing here, he was pursued by
						
						disgrace, by the theft he had committed, and that blood, that
						
						blood!... But yet it was easier for him then. Then everything was
						
						over: he had lost her, given her up. She was gone, for him- oh, then
						
						his death sentence had been easier for him; at least it had seemed
						
						necessary, inevitable, for what had he to stay on earth for?
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p86">But now? Was it the same as then? Now one phantom, one terror at
						
						least was at an end: that first, rightful lover, that fateful figure
						
						had vanished, leaving no trace. The terrible phantom had turned into
						
						something so small, so comic; it had been carried into the bedroom and
						
						locked in. It would never return. She was ashamed, and from her eyes
						
						he could see now whom she loved. Now he had everything to make life
						
						happy... but he could not go on living, he could not; oh, damnation!
						
						"O God! restore to life the man I knocked down at the fence! Let
						
						this fearful cup pass from me! Lord, thou hast wrought miracles for
						
						such sinners as me! But what, what if the old man's alive? Oh, then
						
						the shame of the other disgrace I would wipe away. I would restore the
						
						stolen money. I'd give it back; I'd get it somehow.... No trace of
						
						that shame will remain except in my heart for ever! But no, no; oh,
						
						impossible cowardly dreams! Oh, damnation!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p87">Yet there was a ray of light and hope in his darkness. He jumped
						
						up and ran back to the room- to her, to her, his queen for ever! Was
						
						not one moment of her love worth all the rest of life, even in the
						
						agonies of disgrace? This wild question clutched at his heart. "To
						
						her, to her alone, to see her, to hear her, to think of nothing, to
						
						forget everything, if only for that night, for an hour, for a moment!"
						
						Just as he turned from the balcony into the passage, he came upon
						
						the landlord, Trifon Borissovitch. He thought he looked gloomy and
						
						worried, and fancied he had come to find him.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p88">"What is it, Trifon Borissovitch? Are you looking for me?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p89">"No, sir," The landlord seemed disconcerted. "Why should I be
						
						looking for you? Where have you been?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p90">"Why do you look so glum? You're not angry, are you? Wait a bit,
						
						you shall soon get to bed.... What's the time?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p91">"It'll be three o'clock. Past three, it must be."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p92">"We'll leave off soon. We'll leave off."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p93">"Don't mention it; it doesn't matter. Keep it up as long as you
						
						like..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p94">"What's the matter with him?" Mitya wondered for an instant, and
						
						he ran back to the room where the girls were dancing. But she was
						
						not there. She was not in the blue room either; there was no one but
						
						Kalgonov asleep on the sofa. Mitya peeped behind the curtain- she
						
						was there. She was sitting in the corner, on a trunk. Bent forward,
						
						with her head and arms on the bed close by, she was crying bitterly,
						
						doing her utmost to stifle her sobs that she might not be heard.
						
						Seeing Mitya, she beckoned him to her, and when he ran to her, she
						
						grasped his hand tightly.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p95">"Mitya, Mitya, I loved him, you know. How I have loved him these
						
						five years, all that time! Did I love him or only my own anger? No,
						
						him, him! It's a lie that it was my anger I loved and not him.
						
						Mitya, I was only seventeen then; he was so kind to me, so merry; he
						
						used to sing to me.... Or so it seemed to a silly girl like me.... And
						
						now, O Lord, it's not the same man. Even his face is not the same;
						
						he's different altogether. I shouldn't have known him. I drove here
						
						with Timofey, and all the way I was thinking how I should meet him,
						
						what I should say to him, how we should look at one another. My soul
						
						was faint, and all of a sudden it was just as though he had emptied
						
						a pail of dirty water over me. He talked to me like a schoolmaster,
						
						all so grave and learned; he met me so solemnly that I was struck
						
						dumb. I couldn't get a word in. At first I thought he was ashamed to
						
						talk before his great big Pole. I sat staring at him and wondering why
						
						I couldn't say a word to him now. It must have been his wife that
						
						ruined him; you know he threw me up to get married. She must have
						
						changed him like that. Mitya, how shameful it is! Oh, Mitya, I'm
						
						ashamed, I'm ashamed for all my life. Curse it, curse it, curse
						
						those five years!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p96">And again she burst into tears, but clung tight to Mitya's hand
						
						and did not let it go.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p97">"Mitya, darling, stay, don't go away. I want to say one word to
						
						you," she whispered, and suddenly raised her face to him. "Listen,
						
						tell me who it is I love? I love one man here. Who is that man? That's
						
						what you must tell me."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p98">A smile lighted up her face that was swollen with weeping, and her
						
						eyes shone in the half darkness.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p99">"A falcon flew in, and my heart sank. "Fool! that's the man you
						
						love!' That was what my heart whispered to me at once. You came in and
						
						all grew bright. What's he afraid of? I wondered. For you were
						
						frightened; you couldn't speak. It's not them he's afraid of- could
						
						you be frightened of anyone? It's me he's afraid of, I thought, only
						
						me. So Fenya told you, you little stupid, how I called to Alyosha
						
						out of the window that I'd loved Mityenka for one hour, and that I was
						
						going now to love... another. Mitya, Mitya, how could I be such a fool
						
						as to think I could love anyone after you? Do you forgive me, Mitya?
						
						Do you forgive me or not? Do you love me? Do you love me?" She
						
						jumped up and held him with both hands on his shoulders. Mitya, dumb
						
						with rapture, gazed into her eyes, at her face, at her smile, and
						
						suddenly clasped her tightly his arms and kissed her passionately.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p100">"You will forgive me for having tormented you? It was through
						
						spite I tormented you all. It was for spite I drove the old man out of
						
						his mind.... Do you remember how you drank at my house one day and
						
						broke the wine-glass? I remembered that and I broke a glass to-day and
						
						drank 'to my vile heart.' Mitya, my falcon, why don't you kiss me?
						
						He kissed me once, and now he draws back and looks and listens. Why
						
						listen to me? Kiss me, kiss me hard, that's right. if you love,
						
						well, then, love! I'll be your slave now, your slave for the rest of
						
						my life. It's sweet to be a slave. Kiss me! Beat me, ill-treat me,
						
						do what you will with me.... And I do deserve to suffer. Stay, wait,
						
						afterwards, I won't have that..." she suddenly thrust him away. "Go
						
						along, Mitya, I'll come and have some wine, I want to be drunk, I'm
						
						going to get drunk and dance; I must, I must!" She tore herself away
						
						from him and disappeared behind the curtain. Mitya followed like a
						
						drunken man.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p101">"Yes, come what may- whatever may happen now, for one minute I'd
						
						give the whole world," he thought. Grushenka did, in fact, toss off
						
						a whole glass of champagne at one gulp, and became at once very tipsy.
						
						She sat down in the same chair as before, with a blissful smile on her
						
						face. Her cheeks were glowing, her lips were burning, her flashing
						
						eyes were moist; there was passionate appeal in her eyes. Even
						
						Kalgonov felt a stir at the heart and went up to her.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p102">"Did you feel how I kissed you when you were asleep just now?" she
						
						said thickly. "I'm drunk now, that's what it is.... And aren't you
						
						drunk? And why isn't Mitya drinking? Why don't you drink, Mitya? I'm
						
						drunk, and you don't drink..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p103">"I am drunk! I'm drunk as it is... drunk with you... and now
						
						I'll be drunk with wine, too."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p104">He drank off another glass, and- he thought it strange himself-
						
						that glass made him completely drunk. He was suddenly drunk,
						
						although till that moment he had been quite sober, he remembered that.
						
						From that moment everything whirled about him, as though he were
						
						delirious. He walked, laughed, talked to everybody, without knowing
						
						what he was doing. Only one persistent burning sensation made itself
						
						felt continually, "like a red-hot coal in his heart," he said
						
						afterwards. He went up to her, sat beside her, gazed at her,
						
						listened to her.... She became very talkative, kept calling everyone
						
						to her, and beckoned to different girls out of the chorus. When the
						
						girl came up, she either kissed her, or made the sign of the cross
						
						over her. In another minute she might have cried. She was greatly
						
						amused by the "little old man," as she called Maximov. He ran up every
						
						minute to kiss her hands, each little finger," and finally he danced
						
						another dance to an old song, which he sang himself. He danced with
						
						special vigour to the refrain:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p105" /><p id="viii_2-p106">                 The little pig says- umph! umph! umph!
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p107">                 The little calf says- moo, moo, moo,
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p108">                 The little duck says- quack, quack, quack,
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p109">                 The little goose says- ga, ga, ga.
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p110">                 The hen goes strutting through the porch;
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p111">                 Troo-roo-roo-roo-roo, she'll say,
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p112">                 Troo-roo-roo-roo-roo, she'll say!
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p113" /><p id="viii_2-p114">"Give him something, Mitya," said Grushenka. "Give him a
						
						present, he's poor, you know. Ah, the poor, the insulted!... Do you
						
						know, Mitya, I shall go into a nunnery. No, I really shall one day.
						
						Alyosha said something to me to-day that I shall remember all my
						
						life.... Yes.... But to-day let us dance. To-morrow to the nunnery,
						
						but to-day we'll dance. I want to play to-day, good people, and what
						
						of it? God will forgive us. If I were God, I'd forgive everyone: 'My
						
						dear sinners, from this day forth I forgive you.' I'm going to beg
						
						forgiveness: 'Forgive me, good people, a silly wench.' I'm a beast,
						
						that's what I am. But I want to pray. I gave a little onion. Wicked as
						
						I've been, I want to pray. Mitya, let them dance, don't stop them.
						
						Everyone in the world is good. Everyone- even the worst of them. The
						
						world's a nice place. Though we're bad the world's all right. We're
						
						good and bad, good and bad.... Come, tell me, I've something to ask
						
						you: come here everyone, and I'll ask you: Why am I so good? You
						
						know I am good. I'm very good.... Come, why am I so good?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p115">So Grushenka babbled on, getting more and more drunk. At last
						
						she announced that she was going to dance, too. She got up from her
						
						chair, staggering. "Mitya, don't give me any more wine- if I ask
						
						you, don't give it to me. Wine doesn't give peace. Everything's
						
						going round, the stove, and everything. I want to dance. Let
						
						everyone see how I dance... let them see how beautifully I dance..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p116">She really meant it. She pulled a white cambric handkerchief out
						
						of her pocket, and took it by one corner in her right hand, to wave it
						
						in the dance. Mitya ran to and fro, the girls were quiet, and got
						
						ready to break into a dancing song at the first signal. Maximov,
						
						hearing that Grushenka wanted to dance, squealed with delight, and ran
						
						skipping about in front of her, humming:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p117" /><p id="viii_2-p118">                  With legs so slim and sides so trim
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p119">                  And its little tail curled tight.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p120" /><p id="viii_2-p121">But Grushenka waved her handkerchief at him and drove him away.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p122">"Sh-h! Mitya, why don't they come? Let everyone come... to look
						
						on. Call them in, too, that were locked in.... Why did you lock them
						
						in? Tell them I'm going to dance. Let them look on, too..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p123">Mitya walked with a drunken swagger to the locked door, and
						
						began knocking to the Poles with his fist.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p124">"Hi, you... Podvysotskis! Come, she's going to dance. She calls
						
						you."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p125">"Lajdak!" one of the Poles shouted in reply.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p126">"You're a lajdak yourself! You're a little scoundrel, that's
						
						what you are."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p127">"Leave off laughing at Poland," said Kalganov sententiously. He
						
						too was drunk.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p128">"Be quiet, boy! If I call him a scoundrel, it doesn't mean that
						
						I called all Poland so. One lajdak doesn't make a Poland. Be quiet, my
						
						pretty boy, eat a sweetmeat."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p129">"Ach, what fellows! As though they were not men. Why won't they
						
						make friends?" said Grushenka, and went forward to dance. The chorus
						
						broke into "Ah, my porch, my new porch!" Grushenka flung back her
						
						head, half opened her lips, smiled, waved her handkerchief, and
						
						suddenly, with a violent lurch, stood still in the middle of the room,
						
						looking bewildered.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p130">"I'm weak..." she said in an exhausted voice. "Forgive me....
						
						I'm weak, I can't.... I'm sorry."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p131">She bowed to the chorus, and then began bowing in all directions.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p132">"I'm sorry.... Forgive me..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p133">"The lady's been drinking. The pretty lady has been drinking,"
						
						voices were heard saying.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p134">"The lady's drunk too much," Maximov explained to the girls,
						
						giggling.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p135">"Mitya, lead me away... take me," said Grushenka helplessly. Mitya
						
						pounced on her, snatched her up in his arms, and carried the
						
						precious burden through the curtains.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p136">"Well, now I'll go," thought Kalganov, and walking out of the blue
						
						room, he closed the two halves of the door after him. But the orgy
						
						in the larger room went on and grew louder and louder. Mitya laid
						
						Grushenka on the bed and kissed her on the lips.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p137">"Don't touch me..." she faltered, in an imploring voice. "Don't
						
						touch me, till I'm yours.... I've told you I'm yours, but don't
						
						touch me... spare me.... With them here, with them close, you mustn't.
						
						He's here. It's nasty here..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p138">"I'll obey you! I won't think of it... I worship you!" muttered
						
						Mitya. "Yes, it's nasty here, it's abominable."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p139">And still holding her in his arms, he sank on his knees by the
						
						bedside.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p140">"I know, though you're a brute, you're generous," Grushenka
						
						articulated with difficulty. "It must be honourable... it shall be
						
						honourable for the future... and let us be honest, let us be good, not
						
						brutes, but good... take me away, take me far away, do you hear? I
						
						don't want it to be here, but far, far away..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p141">"Oh, yes, yes, it must be!" said Mitya, pressing her in his
						
						arms. "I'll take you and we'll fly away.... Oh, I'd give my whole life
						
						for one year only to know about that blood!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p142">"What blood?" asked Grushenka, bewildered.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p143">"Nothing," muttered Mitya, through his teeth. "Grusha, you
						
						wanted to be honest, but I'm a thief. But I've stolen money from
						
						Katya.... Disgrace, a disgrace!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p144">"From Katya, from that young lady? No, you didn't steal it. Give
						
						it back to her, take it from me.... Why make a fuss? Now everything of
						
						mine is yours. What does money matter? We shall waste it anyway....
						
						Folks like us are bound to waste money. But we'd better go and work
						
						the land. I want to dig the earth with my own hands. We must work,
						
						do you hear? Alyosha said so. I won't be your mistress, I'll be
						
						faithful to you, I'll be your slave, I'll work for you. We'll go to
						
						the young lady and bow down to her together, so that she may forgive
						
						us, and then we'll go away. And if she won't forgive us, we'll go,
						
						anyway. Take her money and love me.... Don't love her.... Don't love
						
						her any more. If you love her, I shall strangle her.... I'll put out
						
						both her eyes with a needle..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p145">"I love you. love only you. I'll love you in Siberia..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p146">"Why Siberia? Never mind, Siberia, if you like. I don't care...
						
						we'll work... there's snow in Siberia.... I love driving in the
						
						snow... and must have bells.... Do you hear, there's a bell ringing?
						
						Where is that bell ringing? There are people coming.... Now it's
						
						stopped."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p147">She closed her eyes, exhausted, and suddenly fell asleep for an
						
						instant. There had certainly been the sound of a bell in the distance,
						
						but the ringing had ceased. Mitya let his head sink on her breast.
						
						He did not notice that the bell had ceased ringing, nor did he
						
						notice that the songs had ceased, and that instead of singing and
						
						drunken clamour there was absolute stillness in the house. Grushenka
						
						opened her eyes.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p148">"What's the matter? Was I asleep? Yes... a bell... I've been
						
						asleep and dreamt I was driving over the snow with bells, and I dozed.
						
						I was with someone I loved, with you. And far, far away. I was holding
						
						you and kissing you, nestling close to you. I was cold, and the snow
						
						glistened.... You know how the snow glistens at night when the moon
						
						shines. It was as though I was not on earth. I woke up, and my dear
						
						one is close to me. How sweet that is!..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p149">"Close to you," murmured Mitya, kissing her dress, her bosom,
						
						her hands. And suddenly he had a strange fancy: it seemed to him
						
						that she was looking straight before her, not at him, not into his
						
						face, but over his head, with an intent, almost uncanny fixity. An
						
						expression of wonder, almost of alarm, came suddenly into her face.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p150">"Mitya, who is that looking at us?" she whispered.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p151">Mitya turned, and saw that someone had, in fact, parted the
						
						curtains and seemed to be watching them. And not one person alone,
						
						it seemed.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p152">He jumped up and walked quickly to the intruder.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p153">"Here, come to us, come here," said a voice, speaking not
						
						loudly, but firmly and peremptorily.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p154">Mitya passed to the other side of the curtain and stood stock
						
						still. The room was filled with people, but not those who had been
						
						there before. An instantaneous shiver ran down his back, and he
						
						shuddered. He recognised all those people instantly. That tall,
						
						stout old man in the overcoat and forage-cap with a cockade- was the
						
						police captain, Mihail Makarovitch. And that "consumptive-looking"
						
						trim dandy,"who always has such polished boots"- that was the deputy
						
						prosecutor. "He has a chronometer worth four hundred roubles; he
						
						showed it to me." And that small young man in spectacles.... Mitya
						
						forgot his surname though he knew him, had seen him: he was the
						
						"investigating lawyer," from the "school of jurisprudence," who had
						
						only lately come to the town. And this man- the inspector of police,
						
						Mavriky Mavrikyevitch, a man he knew well. And those fellows with
						
						the brass plates on, why are they here? And those other two...
						
						peasants.... And there at the door Kalganov with Trifon
						
						Borissovitch....
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p155">"Gentlemen! What's this for, gentlemen?" began Mitya, but
						
						suddenly, as though beside himself, not knowing what he was doing,
						
						he cried aloud, at the top of his voice:
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p156">"I un-der-stand!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p157">The young man in spectacles moved forward suddenly, and stepping
						
						up to Mitya, began with dignity, though hurriedly:
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p158">"We have to make... in brief, I beg you to come this way, this way
						
						to the sofa.... It is absolutely imperative that you should give an
						
						explanation."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p159">"The old man!" cried Mitya frantically. "The old man and his
						
						blood!... I understand."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p160">And he sank, almost fell, on a chair close by, as though he had
						
						been mown down by a scythe.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p161">"You understand? He understands it! Monster and parricide! Your
						
						father's blood cries out against you!" the old captain of police
						
						roared suddenly, stepping up to Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p162">He was beside himself, crimson in the face and quivering all over.
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p163">"This is impossible!" cried the small young man. "Mihail
						
						Makarovitch, Mihail Makarovitch, this won't do!... I beg you'll
						
						allow me to speak. I should never have expected such behaviour from
						
						you..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p164">"This is delirium, gentlemen, raving delirium," cried the
						
						captain of police; "look at him: drunk, at this time of night, in
						
						the company of a disreputable woman, with the blood of his father on
						
						his hands.... It's delirium!..."
						
						</p><p id="viii_2-p165">"I beg you most earnestly, dear Mihail Makarovitch, to restrain
						
						your feelings," the prosecutor said in a rapid whisper to the old
						
						police captain, "or I shall be forced to resort to- "
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p166">But the little lawyer did not allow him to finish. He turned to
						
						Mitya, and delivered himself in a loud, firm, dignified voice:
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p167">"Ex-Lieutenant Karamazov, it is my duty to inform you that you are
						
						charged with the murder of your father, Fyodor Pavlovitch Karamazov,
						
						perpetrated this night..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_2-p168">He said something more, and the prosecutor, too, put in something,
						
						but though Mitya heard them he did not understand them. He stared at
						
						them all with wild eyes.</p><p id="viii_2-p169" />					
					
					</div4>		
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book IX - The Preliminary Investigation" prev="viii_2" next="i_13" id="iii_11">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - The Beginning of Perhotin's Official Career" prev="iii_11" next="ii_12" id="i_13">
					
							<p id="i_13-p1">PYOTR ILYITCH PERHOTIN, whom we left knocking at the strong locked
						
						gates of the widow Morozov's house, ended, of course, by making
						
						himself heard. Fenya, who was still excited by the fright she had
						
						had two hours before, and too much "upset" to go to bed, was almost
						
						frightened into hysterics on hearing the furious knocking at the gate.
						
						Though she had herself seen him drive away, she fancied that it must
						
						be Dmitri Fyodorovitch knocking again, no one else could knock so
						
						savagely. She ran to the house-porter, who had already waked up and
						
						gone out to the gate, and began imploring him not to open it. But
						
						having questioned Pyotr Ilyitch, and learned that he wanted to see
						
						Fenya on very "important business," the man made up his mind at last
						
						to open. Pyotr Ilyitch was admitted into Fenya's kitchen, but the girl
						
						begged him to allow the houseporter to be present, "because of her
						
						misgivings." He began questioning her and at once learnt the most
						
						vital fact, that is, that when Dmitri Fyodorovitch had run out to look
						
						for Grushenka, he had snatched up a pestle from the mortar, and that
						
						when he returned, the pestle was not with him and his hands were
						
						smeared with blood.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p2">"And the blood was simply flowing, dripping from him, dripping!"
						
						Fenya kept exclaiming. This horrible detail was simply the product
						
						of her disordered imagination. But although not "dripping," Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch had himself seen those hands stained with blood, and had
						
						helped to wash them. Moreover, the question he had to decide was,
						
						not how soon the blood had dried, but where Dmitri Fyodorovitch had
						
						run with the pestle, or rather, whether it really was to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's, and how he could satisfactorily ascertain. Pyotr Ilyitch
						
						persisted in returning to this point, and though he found out
						
						nothing conclusive, yet he carried away a conviction that Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch could have gone nowhere but to his father's house, and
						
						that, therefore, something must have happened there.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p3">"And when he came back," Fenya added with excitement. "I told
						
						him the whole story, and then I began asking him, 'Why have you got
						
						blood on your hands, Dmitri Fyodorovitch?' and he answered that that
						
						was human blood, and that he had just killed someone. He confessed
						
						it all to me, and suddenly ran off like a madman. I sat down and began
						
						thinking, where's he run off to now like a madman? He'll go to Mokroe,
						
						I thought, and kill my mistress there. I ran out to beg him not to
						
						kill her. I was running to his lodgings, but I looked at Plotnikov's
						
						shop, and saw him just setting off, and there was no blood on his
						
						hands then." (Fenya had noticed this and remembered it.) Fenya's old
						
						grandmother confirmed her evidence as far as she was capable. After
						
						asking some further questions, Pyotr Ilyitch left the house, even more
						
						upset and uneasy than he had been when he entered it.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p4">The most direct and the easiest thing for him to do would have
						
						been to go straight to Fyodor Pavlovitch's, to find out whether
						
						anything had happened there, and if so, what; and only to go to the
						
						police captain, as Pyotr Ilyitch firmly intended doing, when he had
						
						satisfied himself of the fact. But the night was dark, Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's gates were strong, and he would have to knock again.
						
						His acquaintance with Fyodor Pavlovitch was of the slightest, and what
						
						if, after he had been knocking, they opened to him, and nothing had
						
						happened? Fyodor Pavlovitch in his jeering way would go telling the
						
						story all over the town, how a stranger, called Perhotin, had broken
						
						in upon him at midnight to ask if anyone had killed him. It would make
						
						a scandal. And scandal was what Pyotr Ilyitch dreaded more than
						
						anything in the world.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p5">Yet the feeling that possessed him was so strong, that though he
						
						stamped his foot angrily and swore at himself, he set off again, not
						
						to Fyodor Pavlovitch's but to Madame Hohlakov's. He decided that if
						
						she denied having just given Dmitri Fyodorovitch three thousand
						
						roubles, he would go straight to the police captain, but if she
						
						admitted having given him the money, he would go home and let the
						
						matter rest till next morning.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p6">It is, of course, perfectly evident that there was even more
						
						likelihood of causing scandal by going at eleven o'clock at night to a
						
						fashionable lady, a complete stranger, and perhaps rousing her from
						
						her bed to ask her an amazing question, than by going to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch. But that is just how it is, sometimes, especially in cases
						
						like the present one, with the decisions of the most precise and
						
						phlegmatic people. Pyotr Ilyitch was by no means phlegmatic at that
						
						moment. He remembered all his life how a haunting uneasiness gradually
						
						gained possession of him, growing more and more painful and driving
						
						him on, against his will. Yet he kept cursing himself, of course,
						
						all the way for going to this lady, but "I will get to the bottom of
						
						it, I will!" he repeated for the tenth time, grinding his teeth, and
						
						he carried out his intention.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p7">It was exactly eleven o'clock when he entered Madame Hohlakov's
						
						house. He was admitted into the yard pretty quickly, but, in
						
						response to his inquiry whether the lady was still up, the porter
						
						could give no answer, except that she was usually in bed by that time.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p8">"Ask at the top of the stairs. If the lady wants to receive you,
						
						she'll receive you. If she won't, she won't."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p9">Pyotr Ilyitch went up, but did not find things so easy here. The
						
						footman was unwilling to take in his name, but finally called a
						
						maid. Pyotr Ilyitch politely but insistently begged her to inform
						
						her lady that an official, living in the town, called Perhotin, had
						
						called on particular business, and that if it were not of the greatest
						
						importance he would not have ventured to come. "Tell her in those
						
						words, in those words exactly," he asked the girl.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p10">She went away. He remained waiting in the entry. Madame Hohlakov
						
						herself was already in her bedroom, though not yet asleep. She had
						
						felt upset ever since Mitya's visit, and had a presentiment that she
						
						would not get through the night without the sick headache which
						
						always, with her, followed such excitement. She was surprised on
						
						hearing the announcement from the maid. She irritably declined to
						
						see him, however, though the unexpected visit at such an hour, of an
						
						"official living in the town," who was a total stranger, roused her
						
						feminine curiosity intensely. But this time Pyotr Ilyitch was as
						
						obstinate as a mule. He begged the maid most earnestly to take another
						
						message in these very words:
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p11">"That he had come on business of the greatest importance, and that
						
						Madame Hohlakov might have cause to regret it later, if she refused to
						
						see him now."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p12">"I plunged headlong," he described it afterwards.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p13">The maid, gazing at him in amazement, went to take his message
						
						again. Madame Hohlakov was impressed. She thought a little, asked what
						
						he looked like, and learned that he was very well dressed, young,
						
						and so polite." We may note, parenthetically, that Pyotr Ilyitch was a
						
						rather good-looking young man, and well aware of the fact. Madame
						
						Hohlakov made up her mind to see him. She was in her dressing-gown and
						
						slippers, but she flung a black shawl over her shoulders. "The
						
						official" was asked to walk into the drawing-room, the very room in
						
						which Mitya had been received shortly before. The lady came to meet
						
						her visitor, with a sternly inquiring countenance, and, without asking
						
						him to sit down, began at once with the question:
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p14">"What do you want?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p15">"I have ventured to disturb you, madam, on a matter concerning our
						
						common acquaintance, Dmitri Fyodorovitch Karamazov," Perhotin began.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p16">But he had hardly uttered the name, when the lady's face showed
						
						signs of acute irritation. She almost shrieked, and interrupted him in
						
						a fury:
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p17">"How much longer am I to be worried by that awful man?" she
						
						cried hysterically. "How dare you, sir, how could you venture to
						
						disturb a lady who is a stranger to you, in her own house at such an
						
						hour!... And to force yourself upon her to talk of a man who came
						
						here, to this very drawing-room, only three hours ago, to murder me,
						
						and went stamping out of the room, as no one would go out of a
						
						decent house. Let me tell you, sir, that I shall lodge a complaint
						
						against you, that I will not let it pass. Kindly leave me at once... I
						
						am a mother.... I... I-"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p18">"Murder! then he tried to murder you, too?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p19">"Why, has he killed somebody else?" Madame Hohlakov asked
						
						impulsively.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p20">"If you would kindly listen, madam, for half a moment, I'll
						
						explain it all in a couple of words," answered Perhotin, firmly. "At
						
						five o'clock this afternoon Dmitri Fyodorovitch borrowed ten roubles
						
						from me, and I know for a fact he had no money. Yet at nine o'clock,
						
						he came to see me with a bundle of hundred-rouble notes in his hand,
						
						about two or three thousand roubles. His hands and face were all
						
						covered with blood, and he looked like a madman. When I asked him
						
						where he had got so much money, he answered that he had just
						
						received it from you, that you had given him a sum of three thousand
						
						to go to the gold mines..."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p21">Madame Hohlakov's face assumed an expression of intense and
						
						painful excitement.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p22">"Good God! He must have killed his old father!" she cried,
						
						clasping her hands. "I have never given him money, never! Oh, run,
						
						run!... Don't say another word Save the old man... run to his
						
						father... run!"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p23">"Excuse me, madam, then you did not give him money? You remember
						
						for a fact that you did not give him any money?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p24">"No, I didn't, I didn't! I refused to give it him, for he could
						
						not appreciate it. He ran out in a fury, stamping. He rushed at me,
						
						but I slipped away.... And let me tell you, as I wish to hide
						
						nothing from you now, that he positively spat at me. Can you fancy
						
						that! But why are we standing? Ah, sit down."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p25">"Excuse me, I..."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p26">"Or better run, run, you must run and save the poor old man from
						
						an awful death!"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p27">"But if he has killed him already?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p28">"Ah, good heavens, yes! Then what are we to do now? What do you
						
						think we must do now?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p29">Meantime she had made Pyotr Ilyitch sit down and sat down herself,
						
						facing him briefly, but fairly clearly, Pyotr Ilyitch told her the
						
						history of the affair, that part of it at least which he had himself
						
						witnessed. He described, too, his visit to Fenya, and told her about
						
						the pestle. All these details produced an overwhelming effect on the
						
						distracted lady, who kept uttering shrieks, and covering her face with
						
						her hands...
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p30">"Would you believe it, I foresaw all this! I have that special
						
						faculty, whatever I imagine comes to pass. And how often I've looked
						
						at that awful man and always thought, that man will end by murdering
						
						me. And now it's happened... that is, if he hasn't murdered me, but
						
						only his own father, it's only because the finger of God preserved me,
						
						and what's more, he was ashamed to murder me because, in this very
						
						place, I put the holy ikon from the relics of the holy martyr, Saint
						
						Varvara, on his neck.... And to think how near I was to death at
						
						that minute I went close up to him and he stretched out his neck to
						
						me!... Do you know, Pyotr Ilyitch (I think you said your name was
						
						Pyotr Ilyitch), I don't believe in miracles, but that ikon and this
						
						unmistakable miracle with me now- that shakes me, and I'm ready to
						
						believe in anything you like. Have you heard about Father
						
						Zossima?... But I don't know what I'm saying... and only fancy, with
						
						the ikon on his neck he spat at me.... He only spat, it's true, he
						
						didn't murder me and... he dashed away! But what shall we do, what
						
						must we do now? What do you think?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p31">Pyotr Ilyitch got up, and announced that he was going straight
						
						to the police captain, to tell him all about it, and leave him to do
						
						what he thought fit.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p32">"Oh, he's an excellent man, excellent! Mihail Makarovitch, I
						
						know him. Of course, he's the person to go to. How practical you
						
						are, Pyotr Ilyitch! How well you've thought of everything! I should
						
						never have thought of it in your place!"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p33">"Especially as I know the police captain very well, too," observed
						
						Pyotr Ilyitch, who still continued to stand, and was obviously anxious
						
						to escape as quickly as possible from the impulsive lady, who would
						
						not let him say good-bye and go away.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p34">"And be sure, be sure," she prattled on, "to come back and tell me
						
						what you see there, and what you find out... what comes to light...
						
						how they'll try him... and what he's condemned to.... Tell me, we have
						
						no capital punishment, have we? But be sure to come, even if it's at
						
						three o'clock at night, at four, at half-past four.... Tell them to
						
						wake me, to wake me, to shake me, if I don't get up.... But, good
						
						heavens, I shan't sleep! But wait, hadn't I better come with you?"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p35">"N-no. But if you would write three lines with your own hand,
						
						stating that you did not give Dmitri Fyodorovitch money, it might,
						
						perhaps, be of use... in case it's needed..."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p36">"To be sure!" Madame Hohlakov skipped, delighted, to her bureau.
						
						"And you know I'm simply struck, amazed at your resourcefulness,
						
						your good sense in such affairs. Are you in the service here? I'm
						
						delighted to think that you're in the service here!"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p37">And still speaking, she scribbled on half a sheet of notepaper the
						
						following lines:</p><p id="i_13-p38" /><p id="i_13-p39">
						
						
						
							I've never in my life lent to that unhappy man, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch Karamazov (for, in spite of all, he is unhappy), three
						
						thousand roubles to-day. I've never given him money, never: That I
						
						swear by all thats holy!</p><p id="i_13-p40">
						
						</p><p id="i_13-p41">                                               K. Hohlakov
						
						
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p42" /><p id="i_13-p43">"Here's the note!" she turned quickly to Pyotr Ilyitch. "Go,
						
						save him. It's a noble deed on your part!"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p44">And she made the sign of the cross three times over him. She ran
						
						out to accompany him to the passage.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p45">"How grateful I am to you! You can't think how grateful I am to
						
						you for having come to me, first. How is it I haven't met you
						
						before? I shall feel flattered at seeing you at my house in the
						
						future. How delightful it is that you are living here!... Such
						
						precision! Such practical ability!... They must appreciate you, they
						
						must understand you. If there's anything I can do, believe me... oh, I
						
						love young people! I'm in love with young people! The younger
						
						generation are the one prop of our suffering country. Her one hope....
						
						Oh, go, go!..."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p46">But Pyotr Ilyitch had already run away or she would not have let
						
						him go so soon. Yet Madame Hohlakov had made a rather agreeable
						
						impression on him, which had somewhat softened his anxiety at being
						
						drawn into such an unpleasant affair. Tastes differ, as we all know.
						
						"She's by no means so elderly," he thought, feeling pleased, "on the
						
						contrary I should have taken her for her daughter."
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p47">As for Madame Hohlakov, she was simply enchanted by the young man.
						
						"Such sence such exactness! in so young a man! in our day! and all
						
						that with such manners and appearance! People say the young people
						
						of to-day are no good for anything, but here's an example!" etc. So
						
						she simply forgot this "dreadful affair," and it was only as she was
						
						getting into bed, that, suddenly recalling "how near death she had
						
						been," she exclaimed: "Ah, it is awful, awful!"
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p48">But she fell at once into a sound, sweet sleep.
						
							</p><p id="i_13-p49">I would not, however, have dwelt on such trivial and irrelevant
						
						details, if this eccentric meeting of the young official with the by
						
						no means elderly widow had not subsequently turned out to be the
						
						foundation of the whole career of that practical and precise young
						
						man. His story is remembered to this day with amazement in our town,
						
						and I shall perhaps have something to say about it, when I have
						
						finished my long history of the Brothers Karamazov.</p>					
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - The Alarm" prev="i_13" next="iii_12" id="ii_12">
					
					
							<p id="ii_12-p1">OUR police captain, Mihail Makarovitch Makarov, a retired
						
						lieutenant-colonel, was a widower and an excellent man. He had only
						
						come to us three years previously, but had won general esteem, chiefly
						
						because he "knew how to keep society together." He was never without
						
						visitors, and could not have got on without them. Someone or other was
						
						always dining with him; he never sat down to table without guests.
						
						He gave regular dinners, too, on all sorts of occasions, sometimes
						
						most surprising ones. Though the fare was not recherche, it was
						
						abundant. The fish-pies were excellent, and the wine made up in
						
						quantity for what it lacked in quality.</p><p id="ii_12-p2">
						
							The first room his guests entered was a well fitted billiard-room,
						
						with pictures of English race horses, in black frames on the walls, an
						
						essential decoration, as we all know, for a bachelor's
						
						billiard-room. There was card playing every evening at his house, if
						
						only at one table. But at frequent intervals, all the society of our
						
						town, with the mammas and young ladies, assembled at his house to
						
						dance. Mihail Makarovitch was a widower, he did not live alone. His
						
						widowed daughter lived with him, with her two unmarried daughters,
						
						grown-up girls, who had finished their education. They were of
						
						agreeable appearance and lively character, and though everyone knew
						
						they would have no dowry, they attracted all the young men of
						
						fashion to their grandfather's house.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p3">Mihail Makarovitch was by no means very efficient in his work,
						
						though he performed his duties no worse than many others. To speak
						
						plainly, he was a man of rather narrow education. His understanding of
						
						the limits of his administrative power could not always be relied
						
						upon. It was not so much that he failed to grasp certain reforms
						
						enacted during the present reign, as that he made conspicuous blunders
						
						in his interpretation of them. This was not from any special lack of
						
						intelligence, but from carelessness, for he was always in to great a
						
						hurry to go into the subject.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p4">"I have the heart of a soldier rather than of a civilian," he used
						
						to say of himself. He had not even formed a definite idea of the
						
						fundamental principles of the reforms connected with the
						
						emancipation of the serfs, and only picked it up, so to speak, from
						
						year to year, involuntarily increasing his knowledge by practice.
						
						And yet he was himself a landowner. Pyotr Ilyitch knew for certain
						
						that he would meet some of Mihail Makarovitch's visitors there that
						
						evening, but he didn't know which. As it happened, at that moment
						
						the prosecutor, and Varvinsky, our district doctor, a young man, who
						
						had only just come to us from Petersburg after taking a brilliant
						
						degree at the Academy of Medicine, were playing whist at the police
						
						captain's. Ippolit Kirillovitch, the prosecutor (he was really the
						
						deputy prosecutor, but we always called him the prosecutor), was
						
						rather a peculiar man, of about five and thirty, inclined to be
						
						consumptive, and married to a fat and childless woman. He was vain and
						
						irritable, though he had a good intellect, and even a kind heart. It
						
						seemed that all that was wrong with him was that he had a better
						
						opinion of himself than his ability warranted. And that made him
						
						seem constantly uneasy. He had, moreover, certain higher, even
						
						artistic, leanings, towards psychology, for instance, a special
						
						study of the human heart, a special knowledge of the criminal and
						
						his crime. He cherished a grievance on this ground, considering that
						
						he had been passed over in the service, and being firmly persuaded
						
						that in higher spheres he had not been properly appreciated, and had
						
						enemies. In gloomy moments he even threatened to give up his post, and
						
						practise as a barrister in criminal cases. The unexpected Karamazov
						
						case agitated him profoundly: "It was a case that might well be talked
						
						about all over Russia." But I am anticipating.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p5">Nikolay Parfenovitch Nelyudov, the young investigating lawyer, who
						
						had only come from Petersburg two months before, was sitting in the
						
						next room with the young ladies. People talked about it afterwards and
						
						wondered that all the gentlemen should, as though intentionally, on
						
						the evening of "the crime" have been gathered together at the house of
						
						the executive authority. Yet it was perfectly simple and happened
						
						quite naturally.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p6">Ippolit Kirillovitch's wife had had toothache for the last two
						
						days, and he was obliged to go out to escape from her groans. The
						
						doctor, from the very nature of his being, could not spend an
						
						evening except at cards. Nikolay Parfenovitch Nelyudov had been
						
						intending for three days past to drop in that evening at Mihail
						
						Makarovitch's, so to speak casually, so as slyly to startle the eldest
						
						granddaughter, Olga Mihailovna, by showing that he knew her secret,
						
						that he knew it was her birthday, and that she was trying to conceal
						
						it on purpose, so as not to be obliged to give a dance. He anticipated
						
						a great deal of merriment, many playful jests about her age, and her
						
						being afraid to reveal it, about his knowing her secret and telling
						
						everybody, and so on. The charming young man was a great adept at such
						
						teasing; the ladies had christened him "the naughty man," and he
						
						seemed to be delighted at the name. He was extremely well-bred,
						
						however, of good family, education and feelings, and, though leading a
						
						life of pleasure, his sallies were always innocent and in good
						
						taste. He was short, and delicate-looking. On his white, slender,
						
						little fingers he always wore a number of big, glittering rings.
						
						When he was engaged in his official duties, he always became
						
						extraordinarily grave, as though realising his position and the
						
						sanctity of the obligations laid upon him. He had a special gift for
						
						mystifying murderers and other criminals of the peasant class during
						
						interrogation, and if he did not win their respect, he certainly
						
						succeeded in arousing their wonder.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p7">Pyotr Ilyitch was simply dumbfounded when he went into the
						
						police captain's. He saw instantly that everyone knew. They had
						
						positively thrown down their cards, all were standing up and
						
						talking. Even Nikolay Parfenovitch had left the young ladies and run
						
						in, looking strenuous and ready for action. Pyotr Ilyitch was met with
						
						the astounding news that old Fyodor Pavlovitch really had been
						
						murdered that evening in his own house, murdered and robbed. The
						
						news had only just reached them in the following manner:
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p8">Marfa Ignatyevna, the wife of old Grigory, who had been knocked
						
						senseless near the fence, was sleeping soundly in her bed and might
						
						well have slept till morning after the draught she had taken. But, all
						
						of a sudden she waked up, no doubt roused by a fearful epileptic
						
						scream from Smerdyakov, who was lying in the next room unconscious.
						
						That scream always preceded his fits, and always terrified and upset
						
						Marfa Ignatyevna. She could never get accustomed to it. She jumped
						
						up and ran half-awake to Smerdyakov's room. But it was dark there, and
						
						she could only hear the invalid beginning to gasp and struggle. Then
						
						Marfa Ignatyevna herself screamed out and was going to call her
						
						husband, but suddenly realised that when she had got up, he was not
						
						beside her in bed. She ran back to the bedstead and began groping with
						
						her hands, but the bed was really empty. Then he must have gone out
						
						where? She ran to the steps and timidly called him. She got no answer,
						
						of course, but she caught the sound of groans far away in the garden
						
						in the darkness. She listened. The groans were repeated, and it was
						
						evident they came from the garden.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p9">"Good Lord! just as it was with Lizaveta Smerdyashtchaya!" she
						
						thought distractedly. She went timidly down the steps and saw that the
						
						gate into the garden was open.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p10">"He must be out there, poor dear," she thought. She went up to the
						
						gate and all at once she distinctly heard Grigory calling her by name,
						
						Marfa! Marfa!" in a weak, moaning, dreadful voice.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p11">"Lord, preserve us from harm!" Marfa Ignatyevna murmured, and
						
						ran towards the voice, and that was how she found Grigory. But she
						
						found him not by the fence where he had been knocked down, but about
						
						twenty paces off. It appeared later, that he had crawled away on
						
						coming to himself, and probably had been a long time getting so far,
						
						losing consciousness several times. She noticed at once that he was
						
						covered with blood, and screamed at the top of her voice. Grigory
						
						was muttering incoherently:
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p12">"He has murdered... his father murdered.... Why scream, silly...
						
						run... fetch someone..."
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p13">But Marfa continued screaming, and seeing that her master's window
						
						was open and that there was a candle alight in the window, she ran
						
						there and began calling Fyodor Pavlovitch. But peeping in at the
						
						window, she saw a fearful sight. Her master was lying on his back,
						
						motionless, on the floor. His light-coloured dressing-gown and white
						
						shirt were soaked with blood. The candle on the table brightly lighted
						
						up the blood and the motionless dead face of Fyodor Pavlovitch.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p14">Terror-stricken, Marfa rushed away from the window, ran out of the
						
						garden, drew the bolt of the big gate and ran headlong by the back way
						
						to the neighbour, Marya Konndratyevna. Both mother and daughter were
						
						asleep, but they waked up at Marfa's desperate and persistent
						
						screaming and knocking at the shutter. Marfa, shrieking and
						
						screaming incoherently, managed to tell them the main fact, and to beg
						
						for assistance. It happened that Foma had come back from his
						
						wanderings and was staying the night with them. They got him up
						
						immediately and all three ran to the scene of the crime. On the way,
						
						Marya Kondratyevna remembered that at about eight o'clock she heard
						
						a dreadful scream from their garden, and this was no doubt Grigory's
						
						scream, "Parricide!" uttered when he caught hold of Mitya's leg.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p15">"Some one person screamed out and then was silent," Marya
						
						Kondratyevna explained as she ran. Running to the place where
						
						Grigory lay, the two women with the help of Foma carried him to the
						
						lodge. They lighted a candle and saw that Smerdyakov was no better,
						
						that he was writhing in convulsions, his eyes fixed in a squint, and
						
						that foam was flowing from his lips. They moistened Grigory's forehead
						
						with water mixed with vinager, and the water revived him at once. He
						
						asked immediately:
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p16">"Is the master murdered?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p17">Then Foma and both the women ran to the house and saw this time
						
						that not only the window, but also the door into the garden was wide
						
						open, though Fyodor Pavlovitch had for the last week locked himself in
						
						every night and did not allow even Grigory to come in on any
						
						pretext. Seeing that door open, they were afraid to go in to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch "for fear anything should happen afterwards." And when they
						
						returned to Grigory, the old man told them to go straight to the
						
						police captain. Marya Kondratyevna ran there and gave the alarm to the
						
						whole party at the police captain's. She arrived only five minutes
						
						before Pyotr Ilyitch, so that his story came, not as his own surmise
						
						and theory, but as the direct conformation by a witness, of the theory
						
						held by all, as to the identity of the criminal (a theory he had in
						
						the bottom of his heart refused to believe till that moment).
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p18">It was resolved to act with energy. The deputy police inspector of
						
						the town was commissioned to take four witnesses, to enter Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's house and there to open an inquiry on the spot, according
						
						to the regular forms, which I will not go into here. The district
						
						doctor, a zealous man, new to his work, almost insisted on
						
						accompanying the police captain, the prosecutor, and the investigating
						
						lawyer.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p19">I will note briefly that Fyodor Pavlovitch was found to be quite
						
						dead, with his skull battered in. But with what? Most likely with
						
						the same weapon with which Grigory had been attacked. And
						
						immediately that weapon was found, Grigory, to whom all possible
						
						medical assistance was at once given, described in a weak and breaking
						
						voice how he had been knocked down. They began looking with a
						
						lantern by the fence and found the brass pestle dropped in a most
						
						conspicuous place on the garden path. There were no signs of
						
						disturbance in the room where Fyodor Pavlovitch was lying. But by
						
						the bed, behind the screen, they picked up from the floor a big and
						
						thick envelope with the inscription: "A present of three thousand
						
						roubles for my angel Grushenka, if she is willing to come." And
						
						below had been added by Fyodor Pavlovitch, "For my little chicken."
						
						There were three seals of red sealing-wax on the envelope, but it
						
						had been torn open and was empty: the money had been removed. They
						
						found also on the floor a piece of narrow pink ribbon, with which
						
						the envelope had been tied up.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p20">One piece of Pyotr Ilyitch's evidence made a great impression on
						
						the prosecutor and the investigating magistrate, namely, his idea that
						
						Dmitri Fyodorovitch would shoot himself before daybreak, that he had
						
						resolved to do so, had spoken of it to Ilyitch, had taken the pistols,
						
						loaded them before him, written a letter, put it in his pocket, etc.
						
						When Pyotr Ilyitch, though still unwilling to believe in it,
						
						threatened to tell someone so as to prevent the suicide, Mitya had
						
						answered grinning: "You'll be too late." So they must make haste to
						
						Mokroe to find the criminal, before he really did shoot himself.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p21">"That's clear, that's clear!" repeated the prosecutor in great
						
						excitement. "That's just the way with mad fellows like that: 'I
						
						shall kill myself to-morrow, so I'll make merry till I die!'"
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p22">The story of how he had bought the wine and provisions excited the
						
						prosecutor more than ever.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p23">"Do you remember the fellow that murdered a merchant called
						
						Olsufyev, gentlemen? He stole fifteen hundred, went at once to have
						
						his hair curled, and then, without even hiding the money, carrying
						
						it almost in his hand in the same way, he went off to the girls."
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p24">All were delayed, however, by the inquiry, the search, and the
						
						formalities, etc., in the house of Fyodor Pavlovitch. It all took time
						
						and so, two hours before starting, they sent on ahead to Mokroe the
						
						officer of the rural police, Mavriky Mavrikyevitch Schmertsov, who had
						
						arrived in the town the morning before to get his pay. He was
						
						instructed to avoid raising the alarm when he reached Mokroe, but to
						
						keep constant watch over the "criminal" till the arrival of the proper
						
						authorities, to procure also witnesses for the arrest, police
						
						constables, and so on. Mavriky Mavrikyevitch did as he was told,
						
						preserving his incognito, and giving no one but his old
						
						acquaintance, Trifon Borissovitch, the slightest hint of his secret
						
						business. He had spoken to him just before Mitya met the landlord in
						
						the balcony, looking for him in the dark, and noticed at once a change
						
						in Trifon Borissovitch's face and voice. So neither Mitya nor anyone
						
						else knew that he was being watched. The box with the pistols had been
						
						carried off by Trifon Borissovitch and put in a suitable place. Only
						
						after four o'clock, almost at sunrise, all the officials, the police
						
						captain, the prosecutor, the investigating lawyer, drove up in two
						
						carriages, each drawn by three horses. The doctor remained at Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's to make a post-mortem next day on the body. But he was
						
						particularly interested in the condition of the servant, Smerdyakov.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p25">"Such violent and protracted epileptic fits, recurring continually
						
						for twenty-four hours, are rarely to be met with, and are of
						
						interest to science," he declared enthusiastically to his
						
						companions, and as they left they laughingly congratulated him on
						
						his find. The prosecutor and the investigating lawyer distinctly
						
						remembered the doctor's saying that Smerdyakov could not outlive the
						
						night.
						
							</p><p id="ii_12-p26">After these long, but I think necessary explanations, we will
						
						return to that moment of our tale at which we broke off.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - The Sufferings of a Soul" prev="ii_12" next="iv_7" id="iii_12">
					
					
						<p id="iii_12-p1">                           The First Ordeal</p><p id="iii_12-p2">
						
						
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p3">AND so Mitya sat looking wildly at the people round him, not
						
						understanding what was said to him. Suddenly he got up, flung up his
						
						hands, and shouted aloud:
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p4">"I'm not guilty! I'm not guilty of that blood! I'm not guilty of
						
						my father's blood.... I meant to kill him. But I'm not guilty. Not I."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p5">But he had hardly said this, before Grushenka rushed from behind
						
						the curtain and flung herself at the police captain's feet.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p6">"It was my fault! Mine! My wickedness!" she cried, in a
						
						heart-rending voice, bathed in tears, stretching out her clasped hands
						
						towards them. "He did it through me. I tortured him and drove him to
						
						it. I tortured that poor old man that's dead, too, in my wickedness,
						
						and brought him to this! It's my fault, mine first, mine most, my
						
						fault!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p7">"Yes, it's your fault! You're the chief criminal! You fury! You
						
						harlot! You're the most to blame!" shouted the police captain,
						
						threatening her with his hand. But he was quickly and resolutely
						
						suppressed. The prosecutor positively seized hold of him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p8">"This is absolutely irregular, Mihail Makarovitch!" he cried. "You
						
						are positively hindering the inquiry.... You're ruining the case."
						
						he almost gasped.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p9">"Follow the regular course! Follow the regular course!" cried
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch, fearfully excited too, "otherwise it's
						
						absolutely impossible!..."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p10">"Judge us together!" Grushenka cried frantically, still
						
						kneeling. "Punish us together. I will go with him now, if it's to
						
						death!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p11">"Grusha, my life, my blood, my holy one!" Mitya fell on his
						
						knees beside her and held her tight in his arms. "Don't believe
						
						her," he cried, "she's not guilty of anything, of any blood, of
						
						anything!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p12">He remembered afterwards that he was forcibly dragged away from
						
						her by several men, and that she was led out, and that when he
						
						recovered himself he was sitting at the table. Beside him and behind
						
						him stood the men with metal plates. Facing him on the other side of
						
						the table sat Nikolay Parfenovitch, the investigating lawyer. He
						
						kept persuading him to drink a little water out of a glass that
						
						stood on the table.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p13">"That will refresh you, that will calm you. Be calm, don't be
						
						frightened," he added, extremely politely. Mitya (he remembered it
						
						afterwards) became suddenly intensely interested in his big rings, one
						
						with an amethyst, and another with a transparent bright yellow
						
						stone, of great brilliance. And long afterwards he remembered with
						
						wonder how those rings had riveted his attention through all those
						
						terrible hours of interrogation, so that he was utterly unable to tear
						
						himself away from them and dismiss them, as things that had nothing to
						
						do with his position. On Mitya's left side, in the place where Maximov
						
						had been sitting at the beginning of the evening, the prosecutor was
						
						now seated, and on Mitya's right hand, where Grushenka had been, was a
						
						rosy-cheeked young man in a sort of shabby hunting-jacket, with ink
						
						and paper before him. This was the secretary of the investigating
						
						lawyer, who had brought him with him. The police captain was now
						
						standing by the window at the other end of the room, beside
						
						Kalganov, who was sitting there.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p14">"Drink some water," said the investigating lawyer softly, for
						
						the tenth time.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p15">"I have drunk it, gentlemen, I have... but come gentlemen, crush
						
						me, punish me, decide my fate!" cried Mitya, staring with terribly
						
						fixed wide-open eyes at the investigating lawyer.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p16">"So you positively declare that you are not guilty of the death of
						
						your father, Fyodor Pavlovitch?" asked the investigating lawyer,
						
						softly but insistently.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p17">"I am not guilty. I am guilty of the blood of another old man, but
						
						not of my father's. And I weep for it! I killed, I killed the old
						
						man and knocked him down.... But it's hard to have to answer for
						
						that murder with another, a terrible murder of which I am not
						
						guilty....It's a terrible accusation, gentlemen, a knockdown blow. But
						
						who has killed my father, who has killed him? Who can have killed
						
						him if I didn't? It's marvellous, extraordinary, impossible."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p18">"Yes, who can have killed him?" the investigating lawyer was
						
						beginning, but Ippolit Kirillovitch, the prosecutor, glancing at
						
						him, addressed Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p19">"You need not worry yourself about the old servant, Grigory
						
						Vasilyevitch. He is alive, he has recovered, and in spite of the
						
						terrible blows inflicted, according to his own and your evidence, by
						
						you, there seems no doubt that he will live, so the doctor says, at
						
						least."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p20">"Alive? He's alive?" cried Mitya, flinging up his hands. His
						
						face beamed. "Lord, I thank Thee for the miracle Thou has wrought
						
						for me, a sinner and evildoer. That's an answer to my prayer. I've
						
						been praying all night." And he crossed himself three times. He was
						
						almost breathless.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p21">"So from this Grigory we have received such important evidence
						
						concerning you, that-" The prosecutor would have continued, but
						
						Mitya suddenly jumped up from his chair.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p22">"One minute, gentlemen, for God's sake, one minute; I will run
						
						to her-"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p23">"Excuse me, at this moment it's quite impossible," Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch almost shrieked. He, too, leapt to his feet. Mitya was
						
						seized by the men with the metal plates, but he sat down of his own
						
						accord....
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p24">"Gentlemen, what a pity! I wanted to see her for one minute
						
						only; I wanted to tell her that it has been washed away, it has
						
						gone, that blood that was weighing on my heart all night, and that I
						
						am not a murderer now! Gentlemen, she is my betrothed!" he said
						
						ecstatically and reverently, looking round at them all. "Oh, thank
						
						you, gentlemen! Oh, in one minute you have given me new life, new
						
						heart!... That old man used to carry me in his arms, gentlemen. He
						
						used to wash me in the tub when I was a baby three years old,
						
						abandoned by everyone, he was like a father to me!..."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p25">"And so you-" the investigating lawyer began.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p26">"Allow me, gentlemen, allow me one minute more," interposed Mitya,
						
						putting his elbows on the table and covering his face with his
						
						hands. "Let me have a moment to think, let me breathe, gentlemen.
						
						All this is horribly upsetting, horribly. A man is not a drum,
						
						gentlemen!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p27">"Drink a little more water," murmured Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
						 Mitya took his hands from his face and laughed. His eyes were
						
						confident. He seemed completely transformed in a moment. His whole
						
						bearing was changed; he was once more the equal of these men, with all
						
						of whom he was acquainted, as though they had all met the day
						
						before, when nothing had happened, at some social gathering. We may
						
						note in passing that, on his first arrival, Mitya had been made very
						
						welcome at the police captain's, but later, during the last month
						
						especially, Mitya had hardly called at all, and when the police
						
						captain met him, in the street, for instance, Mitya noticed that he
						
						frowned and only bowed out of politeness. His acquaintance with the
						
						prosecutor was less intimate, though he sometimes paid his wife, a
						
						nervous and fanciful lady, visits of politeness, without quite knowing
						
						why, and she always received him graciously and had, for some
						
						reason, taken an interest in him up to the last. He had not had time
						
						to get to know the investigating lawyer, though he had met him and
						
						talked to him twice, each time about the fair sex.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p28">"You're a most skilful lawyer, I see, Nikolay Parfenovitch," cried
						
						Mitya, laughing gaily, "but I can help you now. Oh, gentlemen, I
						
						feel like a new man, and don't be offended at my addressing you so
						
						simply and directly. I'm rather drunk, too, I'll tell you that
						
						frankly. I believe I've had the honour and pleasure of meeting you,
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch, at my kinsman Miusov's. Gentlemen, gentlemen,
						
						I don't pretend to be on equal terms with you. I understand, of
						
						course, in what character I am sitting before you. Oh, of course,
						
						there's a horrible suspicion... hanging over me... if Grigory has
						
						given evidence.... A horrible suspicion! It's awful, awful, I
						
						understand that! But to business, gentlemen, I am ready, and we will
						
						make an end of it in one moment; for, listen, listen, gentlemen! Since
						
						I know I'm innocent, we can put an end to it in a minute. Can't we?
						
						Can't we?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p29">Mitya spoke much and quickly, nervously and effusively, as
						
						though he positively took his listeners to be his best friends.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p30">"So, for the present, we will write that you absolutely deny the
						
						charge brought against you," said Nikolay Parfenovitch,
						
						impressively, and bending down to the secretary he dictated to him
						
						in an undertone what to write.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p31">"Write it down? You want to write that down? Well, write it; I
						
						consent, I give my full consent, gentlemen, only... do you see?...
						
						Stay, stay, write this. Of disorderly conduct I am guilty, of violence
						
						on a poor old man I am guilty. And there is something else at the
						
						bottom of my heart, of which I am guilty, too but that you need not
						
						write down" (he turned suddenly to the secretary); "that's my personal
						
						life, gentlemen, that doesn't concern you, the bottom of my heart,
						
						that's to say.... But of the murder of my old father I'm not guilty.
						
						That's a wild idea. It's quite a wild idea!... I will prove you that
						
						and you'll be convinced directly.... You will laugh, gentlemen. You'll
						
						laugh yourselves at your suspicion!..."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p32">"Be calm, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," said the investigating lawyer
						
						evidently trying to allay Mitya's excitement by his own composure.
						
						"Before we go on with our inquiry, I should like, if you will
						
						consent to answer, to hear you confirm the statement that you disliked
						
						your father, Fyodor Pavlovitch, that you were involved in continual
						
						disputes with him. Here at least, a quarter of an hour ago, you
						
						exclaimed that you wanted to kill him: 'I didn't kill him,' you
						
						said,'but I wanted to kill him.'"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p33">"Did I exclaim that? Ach, that may be so, gentlemen! Yes,
						
						unhappily, I did want to kill him... many times I wanted to...
						
						unhappily, unhappily!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p34">"You wanted to. Would you consent to explain what motives
						
						precisely led you to such a sentiment of hatred for your parent?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p35">"What is there to explain, gentlemen?" Mitya shrugged his
						
						shoulders sullenly, looking down. "I have never concealed my feelings.
						
						All the town knows about it- everyone knows in the tavern. Only lately
						
						I declared them in Father Zossima's cell. And the very same day, in
						
						the evening I beat my father. I nearly killed him, and I swore I'd
						
						come again and kill him, before witnesses.... Oh, a thousand
						
						witnesses! I've been shouting it aloud for the last month, anyone
						
						can tell you that!... The fact stares you in the face, it speaks for
						
						itself, it cries aloud, but feelings, gentlemen, feelings are
						
						another matter. You see, gentlemen"- Mitya frowned- "it seemed to me
						
						that about feelings you've no right to question me. I know that you
						
						are bound by your office, I quite understand that, but that's my
						
						affair, my private, intimate affair, yet... since I haven't
						
						concealed my feelings in the past... in the tavern, for instance, I've
						
						talked to everyone, so... so I won't make a secret of it now. You see,
						
						I understand, gentlemen, that there are terrible facts against me in
						
						this business. I told everyone that I'd kill him, and now, all of a
						
						sudden, he's been killed. So it must have been me! Ha ha! I can make
						
						allowances for you, gentlemen, I can quite make allowances. I'm struck
						
						all of a heap myself, for who can have murdered him, if not I?
						
						That's what it comes to, isn't it? If not I, who can it be, who?
						
						Gentlemen, I want to know, I insist on knowing!" he exclaimed
						
						suddenly. "Where was he murdered? How was he murdered? How, and with
						
						what? Tell me," he asked quickly, looking at the two lawyers.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p36">"We found him in his study, lying on his back on the floor, with
						
						his head battered in," said the prosecutor.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p37">"That's horrible!" Mitya shuddered and, putting his elbows on
						
						the table, hid his face in his right hand.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p38">"We will continue," interposed Nikolay Parfenovitch. "So what
						
						was it that impelled you to this sentiment of hatred? You have
						
						asserted in public, I believe, that it was based upon jealousy?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p39">"Well, yes, jealousy. not only jealousy."
						
							"</p><p id="iii_12-p40">Disputes about money?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p41">"Yes, about money, too."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p42">"There was a dispute about three thousand roubles, I think,
						
						which you claimed as part of your inheritance?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p43">"Three thousand! More, more," cried Mitya hotly; "more than six
						
						thousand, more than ten, perhaps. I told everyone so, shouted it at
						
						them. But I made up my mind to let it go at three thousand. I was
						
						desperately in need of that three thousand... so the bundle of notes
						
						for three thousand that I knew he kept under his pillow, ready for
						
						Grushenka, I considered as simply stolen from me. Yes, gentlemen, I
						
						looked upon it as mine, as my own property..."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p44">The prosecutor looked significantly at the investigating lawyer,
						
						and had time to wink at him on the sly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p45">"We will return to that subject later," said the lawyer
						
						promptly. "You will allow us to note that point and write it down;
						
						that you looked upon that money as your own property?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p46">"Write it down, by all means. I know that's another fact that
						
						tells against me, but I'm not afraid of facts and I tell them
						
						against myself. Do you hear? Do you know, gentlemen, you take me for a
						
						different sort of man from what I am," he added, suddenly gloomy and
						
						dejected. "You have to deal with a man of honour, a man of the highest
						
						honour; above all don't lose sight of it- a man who's done a lot of
						
						nasty things, but has always been, and still is, honourable at bottom,
						
						in his inner being. I don't know how to express it. That's just what's
						
						made me wretched all my life, that I yearned to be honourable, that
						
						I was, so to say, a martyr to a sense of honour, seeking for it with a
						
						lantern, with the lantern of Diogenes, and yet all my life I've been
						
						doing filthy things like all of us, gentlemen... that is like me
						
						alone. That was a mistake, like me alone, me alone!... Gentlemen, my
						
						head aches..." His brows contracted with pain. "You see, gentlemen,
						
						I couldn't bear the look of him, there was something in him ignoble,
						
						impudent, trampling on everything sacred, something sneering and
						
						irreverent, loathsome, loathsome. But now that he's dead, I feel
						
						differently."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p47">"How do you mean?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p48">"I don't feel differently, but I wish I hadn't hated him so."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p49">"You feel penitent?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p50">"No, not penitent, don't write that. I'm not much good myself; I'm
						
						not very beautiful, so I had no right to consider him repulsive.
						
						That's what I mean. Write that down, if you like."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p51">Saying this Mitya became very mournful. He had grown more and more
						
						gloomy as the inquiry continued.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p52">At that moment another unexpected scene followed. Though Grushenka
						
						had been removed, she had not been taken far away, only into the
						
						room next but one from the blue room, in which the examination was
						
						proceeding. It was a little room with one window, next beyond the
						
						large room in which they had danced and feasted so lavishly. She was
						
						sitting there with no one by her but Maximov, who was terribly
						
						depressed, terribly scared, and clung to her side, as though for
						
						security. At their door stood one of the peasants with a metal plate
						
						on his breast. Grushenka was crying, and suddenly her grief was too
						
						much for her, she jumped up, flung up her arms and, with a loud wail
						
						of sorrow, rushed out of the room to him, to her Mitya, and so
						
						unexpectedly that they had not time to stop her. Mitya, hearing her
						
						cry, trembled, jumped up, and with a yell rushed impetuously to meet
						
						her, not knowing what he was doing. But they were not allowed to
						
						come together, though they saw one another. He was seized by the arms.
						
						He struggled, and tried to tear himself away. It took three or four
						
						men to hold him. She was seized too, and he saw her stretching out her
						
						arms to him, crying aloud as they carried her away. When the scene was
						
						over, he came to himself again, sitting in the same place as before,
						
						opposite the investigating lawyer, and crying out to them:
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p53">"What do you want with her? Why do you torment her? She's done
						
						nothing, nothing!
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p54">The lawyers tried to soothe him. About ten minutes passed like
						
						this. At last Mihail Makarovitch, who had been absent, came
						
						hurriedly into the room, and said in a loud and excited voice to the
						
						prosecutor:
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p55">"She's been removed, she's downstairs. Will you allow me to say
						
						one word to this unhappy man, gentlemen? In your presence,
						
						gentlemen, in your presence."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p56">"By all means, Mihail Makarovitch," answered the investigating
						
						lawyer. "In the present case we have nothing against it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p57">"Listen, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, my dear fellow," began the police
						
						captain, and there was a look of warm, almost fatherly, feeling for
						
						the luckless prisoner on his excited face. "I took your Agrafena
						
						Alexandrovna downstairs myself, and confided her to the care of the
						
						landlord's daughters, and that old fellow Maximov is with her all
						
						the time. And I soothed her, do you hear? I soothed and calmed her.
						
						I impressed on her that you have to clear yourself, so she mustn't
						
						hinder you, must not depress you, or you may lose your head and say
						
						the wrong thing in your evidence. In fact, I talked to her and she
						
						understood. She's a sensible girl, my boy, a good-hearted girl, she
						
						would have kissed my old hands, begging help for you. She sent me
						
						herself, to tell you not to worry about her. And I must go, my dear
						
						fellow, I must go and tell her that you are calm and comforted about
						
						her. And so you must be calm, do you understand? I was unfair to
						
						her; she is a Christian soul, gentlemen, yes, I tell you, she's a
						
						gentle soul, and not to blame for anything. So what am I to tell
						
						her, Dmitri Fyodorovitch? Will you sit quiet or not?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p58">The good-natured police captain said a great deal that was
						
						irregular, but Grushenka's suffering, a fellow creature's suffering,
						
						touched his good-natured heart, and tears stood in his eyes. Mitya
						
						jumped up and rushed towards him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p59">"Forgive me, gentlemen, oh, allow me, allow me!" he cried. "You've
						
						the heart of an angel, an angel, Mihail Makarovitch, I thank you for
						
						her. I will, I will be calm, cheerful, in fact. Tell her, in the
						
						kindness of your heart, that I am cheerful, quite cheerful, that I
						
						shall be laughing in a minute, knowing that she has a guardian angel
						
						like you. I shall have done with all this directly, and as soon as I'm
						
						free, I'll be with her, she'll see, let her wait. Gentlemen," he said,
						
						turning to the two lawyers, now I'll open my whole soul to you; I'll
						
						pour out everything. We'll finish this off directly, finish it off
						
						gaily. We shall laugh at it in the end, shan't we? But gentlemen, that
						
						woman is the queen of my heart. Oh, let me tell you that. That one
						
						thing I'll tell you now.... I see I'm with honourable men. She is my
						
						light, she is my holy one, and if only you knew! Did you hear her cry,
						
						'I'll go to death with you'? And what have I, a penniless beggar, done
						
						for her? Why such love for me? How can a clumsy, ugly brute like me,
						
						with my ugly face, deserve such love, that she is ready to go to exile
						
						with me? And how she fell down at your feet for my sake, just
						
						now!... and yet she's proud and has done nothing! How can I help
						
						adoring her, how can I help crying out and rushing to her as I did
						
						just now? Gentlemen, forgive me! But now, now I am comforted."
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p60">And he sank back in his chair and, covering his face with his
						
						hands, burst into tears. But they were happy tears. He recovered
						
						himself instantly. The old police captain seemed much pleased, and the
						
						lawyers also. They felt that the examination was passing into a new
						
						phase. When the police captain went out, Mitya was positively gay.
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p61">Now, gentlemen, I am at your disposal, entirely at your disposal.
						
						And if it were not for all these trivial details, we should understand
						
						one another in a minute. I'm at those details again. I'm at your
						
						disposal, gentlemen, but I declare that we must have mutual
						
						confidence, you in me and I in you, or there'll be no end to it. I
						
						speak in your interests. To business, gentlemen, to business, and
						
						don't rummage in my soul; don't tease me with trifles, but only ask me
						
						about facts and what matters, and I will satisfy you at once. And damn
						
						the details!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_12-p62">So spoke Mitya. The interrogation began again.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - The Second Ordeal" prev="iii_12" next="v_6" id="iv_7">
					
							<p id="iv_7-p1">"YOU don't know how you encourage us, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, by your
						
						readiness to answer," said Nikolay Parfenovitch, with an animated air,
						
						and obvious satisfaction beaming in his very prominent, short-sighted,
						
						light grey eyes, from which he had removed his spectacles a moment
						
						before. "And you have made a very just remark about the mutual
						
						confidence, without which it is sometimes positively impossible to get
						
						on in cases of such importance, if the suspected party really hopes
						
						and desires to defend himself and is in a position to do so. We on our
						
						side, will do everything in our power, and you can see for yourself
						
						how we are conducting the case. You approve, Ippolit Kirillovitch?" He
						
						turned to the prosecutor.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p2">"Oh, undoubtedly," replied the prosecutor. His tone was somewhat
						
						cold, compared with Nikolay Parfenovitch's impulsiveness.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p3">I will note once for all that Nikolay Parfenovitch, who had but
						
						lately arrived among us, had from the first felt marked respect for
						
						Ippolit Kirillovitch, our prosecutor, and had become almost his
						
						bosom friend. He was almost the only person who put implicit faith
						
						in Ippolit Kirillovitch's extraordinary talents as a psychologist
						
						and orator and in the justice of his grievance. He had heard of him in
						
						Petersburg. On the other hand, young Nikolay Parfenovitch was the only
						
						person in the whole world whom our "unappreciated" prosecutor
						
						genuinely liked. On their way to Mokroe they had time to come to an
						
						understanding about the present case. And now as they sat at the
						
						table, the sharp-witted junior caught and interpreted every indication
						
						on his senior colleague's face- half a word, a glance, or a wink.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p4">"Gentlemen, only let me tell my own story and don't interrupt me
						
						with trivial questions and I'll tell you everything in a moment," said
						
						Mitya excitedly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p5">"Excellent! Thank you. But before we proceed to listen to your
						
						communication, will you allow me to inquire as to another little
						
						fact of great interest to us? I mean the ten roubles you borrowed
						
						yesterday at about five o'clock on the security of your pistols,
						
						from your friend, Pyotr Ilyitch Perhotin."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p6">"I pledged them, gentlemen. I pledged them for ten roubles. What
						
						more? That's all about it. As soon as I got back to town I pledged
						
						them."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p7">"You got back to town? Then you had been out of town?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p8">"Yes, I went a journey of forty versts into the country. Didn't
						
						you know?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p9">The prosecutor and Nikolay Parfenovitch exchanged glances.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p10">"Well, how would it be if you began your story with a systematic
						
						description of all you did yesterday, from the morning onwards?
						
						Allow us, for instance, to inquire why you were absent from the
						
						town, and just when you left and when you came back- all those facts."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p11">"You should have asked me like that from the beginning," cried
						
						Mitya, laughing aloud, "and, if you like, we won't begin from
						
						yesterday, but from the morning of the day before; then you'll
						
						understand how, why, and where I went. I went the day before
						
						yesterday, gentlemen, to a merchant of the town, called Samsonov, to
						
						borrow three thousand roubles from him on safe security. It was a
						
						pressing matter, gentlemen, it was a sudden necessity."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p12">"Allow me to interrupt you," the prosecutor put in politely.
						
						"Why were you in such pressing need for just that sum, three
						
						thousand?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p13">"Oh, gentlemen, you needn't go into details, how, when and why,
						
						and why just so much money, and not so much, and all that rigmarole.
						
						Why, it'll run to three volumes, and then you'll want an epilogue!"
						
						Mitya said all this with the good-natured but impatient familiarity of
						
						a man who is anxious to tell the whole truth and is full of the best
						
						intentions.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p14">"Gentlemen!"- he corrected himself hurriedly- "don't be vexed with
						
						me for my restiveness, I beg you again. Believe me once more, I feel
						
						the greatest respect for you and understand the true position of
						
						affairs. Don't think I'm drunk. I'm quite sober now. And, besides,
						
						being drunk would be no hindrance. It's with me, you know, like the
						
						saying: 'When he is sober, he is a fool; when he is drunk, he is a
						
						wise man.' Ha ha! But I see, gentlemen, it's not the proper thing to
						
						make jokes to you, till we've had our explanation, I mean. And I've my
						
						own dignity to keep up, too. I quite understand the difference for the
						
						moment. I am, after all, in the position of a criminal, and so, far
						
						from being on equal terms with you. And it's your business to watch
						
						me. I can't expect you to pat me on the head for what I did to
						
						Grigory, for one can't break old men's heads with impunity. I
						
						suppose you'll put me away for him for six months, or a year
						
						perhaps, in a house of correction. I don't know what the punishment
						
						is- but it will be without loss of the rights of my rank, without loss
						
						of my rank, won't it? So you see, gentlemen, I understand the
						
						distinction between us.... But you must see that you could puzzle
						
						God Himself with such questions. 'How did you step? Where did you
						
						step? When did you step? And on what did you step?' I shall get
						
						mixed up, if you go on like this, and you will put it all down against
						
						me. And what will that lead to? To nothing! And even if it's
						
						nonsense I'm talking now, let me finish, and you, gentlemen, being men
						
						of honour and refinement, will forgive me! I'll finish by asking
						
						you, gentlemen, to drop that conventional method of questioning. I
						
						mean, beginning from some miserable trifle, how I got up, what I had
						
						for breakfast, how I spat, and where I spat, and so distracting the
						
						attention of the criminal, suddenly stun him with an overwhelming
						
						question, 'Whom did you murder? Whom did you rob?' Ha-ha! That's
						
						your regulation method, that's where all your cunning comes in. You
						
						can put peasants off their guard like that, but not me. I know the
						
						tricks. I've been in the service, too. Ha ha ha! You're not angry,
						
						gentlemen? You forgive my impertinence?" he cried, looking at them
						
						with a good-nature that was almost surprising. "It's only Mitya
						
						Karamazov, you know, so you can overlook it. It would be inexcusable
						
						in a sensible man; but you can forgive it in Mitya. Ha ha!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p15">Nikolay Parfenovitch listened, and laughed too. Though the
						
						prosecutor did not laugh, he kept his eyes fixed keenly on Mitya, as
						
						though anxious not to miss the least syllable, the slightest movement,
						
						the smallest twitch of any feature of his face.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p16">"That's how we have treated you from the beginning," said
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch, still laughing. "We haven't tried to put you out
						
						by asking how you got up in the morning and what you had for
						
						breakfast. We began, indeed, with questions of the greatest
						
						importance."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p17">"I understand. I saw it and appreciated it, and I appreciate still
						
						more your present kindness to me, an unprecedented kindness, worthy of
						
						your noble hearts. We three here are gentlemen and let everything be
						
						on the footing of mutual confidence between educated, well-bred
						
						people, who have the common bond of noble birth and honour. In any
						
						case, allow me to look upon you as my best friends at this moment of
						
						my life, at this moment when my honour is assailed. That's no
						
						offence to you, gentlemen, is it?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p18">On the contrary. You've expressed all that so well, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch," Nikolay Parfenovitch answered with dignified
						
						approbation.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p19">"And enough of those trivial questions, gentlemen, all those
						
						tricky questions! cried Mitya enthusiastically. "Or there's simply
						
						no knowing where we shall get to! Is there?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p20">"I will follow your sensible advice entirely," the prosecutor
						
						interposed, addressing Mitya. "I don't withdraw my question,
						
						however. It is now vitally important for us to know exactly why you
						
						needed that sum, I mean precisely three thousand."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p21">"Why I needed it?... Oh, for one thing and another.... Well, it
						
						was to pay a debt."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p22">"A debt to whom?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p23">"That I absolutely refuse to answer, gentlemen. Not because I
						
						couldn't, or because I shouldn't dare, or because it would be
						
						damaging, for it's all a paltry matter and absolutely trifling, but- I
						
						won't, because it's a matter of principle: that's my private life, and
						
						I won't allow any intrusion into my private life. That's my principle.
						
						Your question has no bearing on the case, and whatever has nothing
						
						to do with the case is my private affair. I wanted to pay a debt. I
						
						wanted to pay a debt of honour but to whom I won't say."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p24">"Allow me to make a note of that," said the prosecutor.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p25">"By all means. Write down that I won't say, that I won't. Write
						
						that I should think it dishonourable to say. Ech! you can write it;
						
						you've nothing else to do with your time."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p26">"Allow me to caution you, sir, and to remind you once more, if you
						
						are unaware of it," the prosecutor began, with a peculiar and stern
						
						impressiveness, "that you have a perfect right not to answer the
						
						questions put to you now, and we on our side have no right to extort
						
						an answer from you, if you decline to give it for one reason or
						
						another. That is entirely a matter for your personal decision. But
						
						it is our duty, on the other hand, in such cases as the present, to
						
						explain and set before you the degree of injury you will be doing
						
						yourself by refusing to give this or that piece of evidence. After
						
						which I will beg you to continue."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p27">"Gentlemen, I'm not angry... I... "Mitya muttered in a rather
						
						disconcerted tone. "Well, gentlemen, you see, that Samsonov to whom
						
						I went then..."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p28">We will, of course, not reproduce his account of what is known
						
						to the reader already. Mitya was impatiently anxious not to omit the
						
						slightest detail. At the same time he was in a hurry to get it over.
						
						But as he gave his evidence it was written down, and therefore they
						
						had continually to pull him up. Mitya disliked this, but submitted;
						
						got angry, though still good-humouredly. He did, it is true,
						
						exclaim, from time to time, "Gentlemen, that's enough to make an angel
						
						out of patience!" Or, "Gentlemen, it's no good your irritating me."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p29">But even though he exclaimed he still preserved for a time his
						
						genially expansive mood. So he told them how Samsonov had made a
						
						fool of him two days before. (He had completely realised by now that
						
						he had been fooled.) The sale of his watch for six roubles to obtain
						
						money for the journey was something new to the lawyers. They were at
						
						once greatly interested, and even, to Mitya's intense indignation,
						
						thought it necessary to write the fact down as a secondary
						
						confirmation of the circumstance that he had hardly a farthing in
						
						his pocket at the time. Little by little Mitya began to grow surly.
						
						Then, after describing his journey to see Lyagavy, the night spent
						
						in the stifling hut, and so on, he came to his return to the town.
						
						Here he began, without being particularly urged, to give a minute
						
						account of the agonies of jealousy he endured on Grushenka's account.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p30">He was heard with silent attention. They inquired particularly
						
						into the circumstance of his having a place of ambush in Marya
						
						Kondratyevna's house at the back of Fyodor Pavlovitch's garden to keep
						
						watch on Grushenka, and of Smerdyakov's bringing him information. They
						
						laid particular stress on this, and noted it down. Of his jealousy
						
						he spoke warmly and at length, and though inwardly ashamed at exposing
						
						his most intimate feelings to "public ignominy," so to speak, he
						
						evidently overcame his shame in order to tell the truth. The frigid
						
						severity with which the investigating lawyer, and still more the
						
						prosecutor, stared intently at him as he told his story,
						
						disconcerted him at last considerably.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p31">"That boy, Nikolay Parfenovitch, to whom I was talking nonsense
						
						about women only a few days ago, and that sickly prosecutor are not
						
						worth my telling this to," he reflected mournfully. "It's ignominious.
						
						'Be patient, humble, hold thy peace.'" He wound up his reflections
						
						with that line. But he pulled himself together to go on again. When he
						
						came to telling of his visit to Madame Hohlakov, he regained his
						
						spirits and even wished to tell a little anecdote of that lady which
						
						had nothing to do with the case. But the investigating lawyer
						
						stopped him, and civilly suggested that he should pass on to "more
						
						essential matters." At last, when he described his despair and told
						
						them how, when he left Madame Hohlakov's, he thought that he'd "get
						
						three thousand if he had to murder someone to do it," they stopped him
						
						again and noted down that he had "meant to murder someone." Mitya
						
						let them write it without protest. At last he reached the point in his
						
						story when he learned that Grushenka had deceived him and had returned
						
						from Samsonov's as soon as he left her there, though she had said that
						
						she would stay there till midnight.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p32">"If I didn't kill Fenya then, gentlemen, it was only because I
						
						hadn't time," broke from him suddenly at that point in his story.
						
						That, too, was carefully written down. Mitya waited gloomily, and
						
						was beginning to tell how he ran into his father's garden when the
						
						investigating lawyer suddenly stopped him, and opening the big
						
						portfolio that lay on the sofa beside him he brought out the brass
						
						pestle.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p33">"Do you recognise this object?" he asked, showing it to Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p34">"Oh, yes," he laughed gloomily. "Of course, I recognise it. Let me
						
						have a look at it.... Damn it, never mind!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p35">"You have forgotten to mention it," observed the investigating
						
						lawyer.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p36">"Hang it all, I shouldn't have concealed it from you. Do you
						
						suppose I could have managed without it? It simply escaped my memory."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p37">"Be so good as to tell us precisely how you came to arm yourself
						
						with it."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p38">"Certainly I will be so good, gentlemen."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p39">And Mitya described how he took the pestle and ran.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p40">"But what object had you in view in arming yourself with such a
						
						weapon?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p41">"What object? No object. I just picked it up and ran off."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p42">"What for, if you had no object?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p43">Mitya's wrath flared up. He looked intently at "the boy" and
						
						smiled gloomily and malignantly. He was feeling more and more
						
						ashamed at having told "such people" the story of his jealousy so
						
						sincerely and spontaneously.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p44">"Bother the pestle!" broke from him suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p45">"But still-"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p46">"Oh, to keep off dogs... Oh, because it was dark.... In case
						
						anything turned up."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p47">"But have you ever on previous occasions taken a weapon with you
						
						when you went out, since you're afraid of the dark?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p48">"Ugh! damn it all, gentlemen! There's positively no talking to
						
						you!" cried Mitya, exasperated beyond endurance, and turning to the
						
						secretary, crimson with anger, he said quickly, with a note of fury in
						
						his voice:
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p49">"Write down at once... at once... 'that I snatched up the pestle
						
						to go and kill my father... Fyodor Pavlovitch... by hitting him on the
						
						head with it!' Well, now are you satisfied, gentlemen? Are your
						
						minds relieved?" he said, glaring defiantly at the lawyers.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p50">"We quite understand that you made that statement just now through
						
						exasperation with us and the questions we put to you, which you
						
						consider trivial, though they are, in fact, essential," the prosecutor
						
						remarked drily in reply.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p51">"Well, upon my word, gentlemen! Yes, I took the pestle.... What
						
						does one pick things up for at such moments? I don't know what for.
						
						I snatched it up and ran- that's all. For to me, gentlemen, passons,
						
						or I declare I won't tell you any more."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p52">He sat with his elbows on the table and his head in his hand. He
						
						sat sideways to them and gazed at the wall, struggling against a
						
						feeling of nausea. He had, in fact, an awful inclination to get up and
						
						declare that he wouldn't say another word, "not if you hang me for
						
						it."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p53">"You see, gentlemen," he said at last, with difficulty controlling
						
						himself, "you see. I listen to you and am haunted by a dream....
						
						It's a dream I have sometimes, you know.... I often dream it- it's
						
						always the same... that someone is hunting me, someone I'm awfully
						
						afraid of... that he's hunting me in the dark, in the night...
						
						tracking me, and I hide somewhere from him, behind a door or cupboard,
						
						hide in a degrading way, and the worst of it is, he always knows where
						
						I am, but he pretends not to know where I am on purpose, to prolong my
						
						agony, to enjoy my terror.... That's just what you're doing now.
						
						It's just like that!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p54">"Is that the sort of thing you dream about?" inquired the
						
						prosecutor.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p55">"Yes, it is. Don't you want to write it down?" said Mitya, with
						
						a distorted smile.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p56">"No; no need to write it down. But still you do have curious
						
						dreams."
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p57">"It's not a question of dreams now, gentlemen- this is realism,
						
						this is real life! I'm a wolf and you're the hunters. Well, hunt him
						
						down!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p58">"You are wrong to make such comparisons." began Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch, with extraordinary softness.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p59">"No, I'm not wrong, at all!" Mitya flared up again, though his
						
						outburst of wrath had obviously relieved his heart. He grew more
						
						good humoured at every word. "You may not trust a criminal or a man on
						
						trial tortured by your questions, but an honourable man, the
						
						honourable impulses of the heart (I say that boldly!)- no! That you
						
						must believe you have no right indeed... but-
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iv_7-p60">                 Be silent, heart,
						
						</p><p id="iv_7-p61">                 Be patient, humble, hold thy peace.
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iv_7-p62">Well, shall I go on?" he broke off gloomily.
						
							</p><p id="iv_7-p63">"If you'll be so kind," answered Nikolay Parfenovitch.</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - The Third Ordeal" prev="iv_7" next="vi_5" id="v_6">
					
							<p id="v_6-p1">THOUGH Mitya spoke sullenly, it was evident that he was trying
						
						more than ever not to forget or miss a single detail of his story.
						
						He told them how he had leapt over the fence into his father's garden;
						
						how he had gone up to the window; told them all that had passed
						
						under the window. Clearly, precisely, distinctly, he described the
						
						feelings that troubled him during those moments in the garden when
						
						he longed so terribly to know whether Grushenka was with his father or
						
						not. But, strange to say, both the lawyers listened now with a sort of
						
						awful reserve, looked coldly at him, asked few questions. Mitya
						
						could gather nothing from their faces.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p2">"They're angry and offended," he thought. "Well, bother them!"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p3">When he described how he made up his mind at last to make the
						
						"signal" to his father that Grushenka had come, so that he should open
						
						the window, the lawyers paid no attention to the word "signal," as
						
						though they entirely failed to grasp the meaning of the word in this
						
						connection: so much so, that Mitya noticed it. Coming at last to the
						
						moment when, seeing his father peering out of the window, his hatred
						
						flared up and he pulled the pestle out of his pocket, he suddenly,
						
						as though of design, stopped short. He sat gazing at the wall and
						
						was aware that their eyes were fixed upon him.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p4">"Well?" said the investigating lawyer. "You pulled out the
						
						weapon and... and what happened then?
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p5">"Then? Why, then I murdered him... hit him on the head and cracked
						
						his skull.... I suppose that's your story. That's it!"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p6">His eyes suddenly flashed. All his smothered wrath suddenly flamed
						
						up with extraordinary violence in his soul.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p7">"Our story?" repeated Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p8">Mitya dropped his eyes and was a long time silent.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p9">"My story, gentlemen? Well, was like this," he began softly.
						
						"Whether it was like this," he began softly. "Whether it was someone's
						
						tears, or my mother prayed to God, or a good angel kissed me at that
						
						instant, I don't know. But the devil was conquered. I rushed from
						
						the window and ran to the fence. My father was alarmed and, for the
						
						first time, he saw me then, cried out, and sprang back from the
						
						window. I remember that very well. I ran across the garden to the
						
						fence... and there Grigory caught me, when I was sitting on the
						
						fence."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p10">At that point he raised his eyes at last and looked at his
						
						listeners. They seemed to be staring at him with perfectly unruffled
						
						attention. A sort of paroxysm of indignation seized on Mitya's soul.
						
							"Why, you're laughing at me at this moment, gentlemen!" he broke
						
						off suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p11">"What makes you think that?" observed Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p12">"You don't believe one word- that's why! I understand, of
						
						course, that I have come to the vital point. The old man's lying there
						
						now with his skull broken, while I- after dramatically describing
						
						how I wanted to kill him, and how I snatched up the pestle- I suddenly
						
						run away from the window. A romance! Poetry! As though one could
						
						believe a fellow on his word. Ha ha! You are scoffers, gentlemen!"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p13">And he swung round on his chair so that it creaked.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p14">"And did you notice," asked the prosecutor suddenly, as though not
						
						observing Mitya's excitement, "did you notice when you ran away from
						
						the window, whether the door into the garden was open?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p15">"No, it was not open."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p16">"It was not?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p17">"It was shut. And who could open it? Bah! the door. Wait a bit!"
						
						he seemed suddenly to bethink himself, and almost with a start:
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p18">"Why, did you find the door open?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p19">"Yes, it was open."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p20">"Why, who could have opened it if you did not open it yourselves?"
						
						cried Mitya, greatly astonished.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p21">"The door stood open, and your father's murderer undoubtedly
						
						went in at that door, and, having accomplished the crime, went out
						
						again by the same door," the prosecutor pronounced deliberately, as
						
						though chiselling out each word separately. "That is perfectly
						
						clear. The murder was committed in the room and not through the
						
						window; that is absolutely certain from the examination that has
						
						been made, from the position of the body and everything. There can
						
						be no doubt of that circumstance."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p22">Mitya was absolutely dumbfounded.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p23">"But that's utterly impossible!" he cried, completely at a loss.
						
						"I... I didn't go in.... I tell you positively, definitely, the door
						
						was shut the whole time I was in the garden, and when I ran out of the
						
						garden. I only stood at the window and saw him through the window.
						
						That's all, that's all.... I remember to the last minute. And if I
						
						didn't remember, it would be just the same. I know it, for no one knew
						
						the signals except Smerdyakov, and me, and the dead man. And he
						
						wouldn't have opened the door to anyone in the world without the
						
						signals."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p24">"Signals? What signals?" asked the prosecutor, with greedy, almost
						
						hysterical, curiosity. He instantly lost all trace of his reserve
						
						and dignity. He asked the question with a sort of cringing timidity.
						
						He scented an important fact of which he had known nothing, and was
						
						already filled with dread that Mitya might be unwilling to disclose
						
						it.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p25">"So you didn't know!" Mitya winked at him with a malicious and
						
						mocking smile. "What if I won't tell you? From whom could you find
						
						out? No one knew about the signals except my father, Smerdyakov, and
						
						me: that was all. Heaven knew, too, but it won't tell you. But it's an
						
						interesting fact. There's no knowing what you might build on it. Ha
						
						ha! Take comfort, gentlemen, I'll reveal it. You've some foolish
						
						idea in your hearts. You don't know the man you have to deal with! You
						
						have to do with a prisoner who gives evidence against himself, to
						
						his own damage! Yes, for I'm a man of honour and you- are not."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p26">The prosecutor swallowed this without a murmur. He was trembling
						
						with impatience to hear the new fact. Minutely and diffusely Mitya
						
						told them everything about the signals invented by Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						for Smerdyakov. He told them exactly what every tap on the window
						
						meant, tapped the signals on the table, and when Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch said that he supposed he, Mitya, had tapped the signal
						
						"Grushenka has come," when he tapped to his father, he answered
						
						precisely that he had tapped that signal, that "Grushenka had come."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p27">"So now you can build up your tower," Mitya broke off, and again
						
						turned away from them contemptuously.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p28">"So no one knew of the signals but your dead father, you, and
						
						the valet Smerdyakov? And no one else?" Nikolay Parfenovitch
						
						inquired once more.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p29">"Yes. The valet Smerdyakov, and Heaven. Write down about Heaven.
						
						That may be of use. Besides, you will need God yourselves."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p30">And they had already of course, begun writing it down. But while
						
						they wrote, the prosecutor said suddenly, as though pitching on a
						
						new idea:
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p31">"But if Smerdyakov also knew of these signals and you absolutely
						
						deny all responsibility for the death of your father, was it not he,
						
						perhaps, who knocked the signal agreed upon, induced your father to
						
						open to him, and then... committed the crime?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p32">Mitya turned upon him a look of profound irony and intense hatred.
						
						His silent stare lasted so long that it made the prosecutor blink.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p33">"You've caught the fox again," commented Mitya at last; "you've
						
						got the beast by the tail. Ha ha! I see through you, Mr. Prosecutor.
						
						You thought, of course, that I should jump at that, catch at your
						
						prompting, and shout with all my might, 'Aie! it's Smerdyakov; he's
						
						the murderer.' Confess that's what you thought. Confess, and I'll go
						
						on."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p34">But the prosecutor did not confess. He held his tongue and waited.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p35">"You're mistaken. I'm not going to shout, 'It's Smerdyakov,'" said
						
						Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p36">"And you don't even suspect him?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p37">"Why, do you suspect him?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p38">"He is suspected, too."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p39">Mitya fixed his eyes on the floor.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p40">"Joking apart," he brought out gloomily. "Listen. From the very
						
						beginning, almost from the moment when I ran out to you from behind
						
						the curtain, I've had the thought of Smerdyakov in my mind. I've
						
						been sitting here, shouting that I'm innocent and thinking all the
						
						time 'Smerdyakov!' I can't get Smerdyakov out of my head. In fact,
						
						I, too, thought of Smerdyakov just now; but only for a second.
						
						Almost at once I thought, 'No, it's not Smerdyakov.' It's not his
						
						doing, gentlemen."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p41">"In that case is there anybody else you suspect?" Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch inquired cautiously.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p42">"I don't know anyone it could be, whether it's the hand of
						
						Heaven or of Satan, but... not Smerdyakov," Mitya jerked out with
						
						decision.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p43">"But what makes you affirm so confidently and emphatically that
						
						it's not he?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p44">"From my conviction- my impression. Because Smerdyakov is a man of
						
						the most abject character and a coward. He's not a coward, he's the
						
						epitome of all the cowardice in the world walking on two legs. He
						
						has the heart of a chicken. When he talked to me, he was always
						
						trembling for fear I should kill him, though I never raised my hand
						
						against him. He fell at my feet and blubbered; he has kissed these
						
						very boots, literally, beseeching me 'not to frighten him.' Do you
						
						hear? 'Not to frighten him.' What a thing to say! Why, I offered him
						
						money. He's a puling chicken- sickly, epileptic, weak-minded- a
						
						child of eight could thrash him. He has no character worth talking
						
						about. It's not Smerdyakov, gentlemen. He doesn't care for money; he
						
						wouldn't take my presents. Besides, what motive had he for murdering
						
						the old man? Why, he's very likely his son, you know- his natural son.
						
						Do you know that?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p45">"We have heard that legend. But you are your father's son, too,
						
						you know; yet you yourself told everyone you meant to murder him."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p46">"That's a thrust! And a nasty, mean one, too! I'm not afraid!
						
						Oh, gentlemen, isn't it too base of you to say that to my face? It's
						
						base, because I told you that myself. I not only wanted to murder him,
						
						but I might have done it. And, what's more, I went out of my way to
						
						tell you of my own accord that I nearly murdered him. But, you see,
						
						I didn't murder him; you see, my guardian angel saved me- that's
						
						what you've not taken into account. And that's why it's so base of
						
						you. For I didn't kill him, I didn't kill him! Do you hear, I did
						
						not kill him."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p47">He was almost choking. He had not been so moved before during
						
						the whole interrogation.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p48">"And what has he told you, gentlemen- Smerdyakov, I mean?" he
						
						added suddenly, after a pause. "May I ask that question?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p49">"You may ask any question," the prosecutor replied with frigid
						
						severity, "any question relating to the facts of the case, and we are,
						
						I repeat, bound to answer every inquiry you make. We found the servant
						
						Smerdyakov, concerning whom you inquire, lying unconscious in his bed,
						
						in an epileptic fit of extreme severity, that had recurred,
						
						possibly, ten times. The doctor who was with us told us, after
						
						seeing him, that he may possibly not outlive the night."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p50">"Well, if that's so, the devil must have killed him," broke
						
						suddenly from Mitya, as though until that moment had been asking
						
						himself: "Was it Smerdyakov or not?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p51">"We will come back to this later," Nikolay Parfenovitch decided.
						
						"Now wouldn't you like to continue your statement?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p52">Mitya asked for a rest. His request was courteously granted. After
						
						resting, he went on with his story. But he was evidently depressed. He
						
						was exhausted, mortified, and morally shaken. To make things worse the
						
						prosecutor exasperated him, as though intentionally, by vexatious
						
						interruptions about "trifling points." Scarcely had Mitya described
						
						how, sitting on the wall, he had struck Grigory on the head with the
						
						pestle, while the old man had hold of his left leg, and how he then
						
						jumped down to look at him, when the prosecutor stopped him to ask him
						
						to describe exactly how he was sitting on the wall. Mitya was
						
						surprised.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p53">"Oh, I was sitting like this, astride, one leg on one side of
						
						the wall and one on the other."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p54">"And the pestle?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p55">"The pestle was in my hand."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p56">"Not in your pocket? Do you remember that precisely? Was it a
						
						violent blow you gave him?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p57">"It must have been a violent one. But why do you ask?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p58">"Would you mind sitting on the chair just as you sat on the wall
						
						then and showing us just how you moved your arm, and in what
						
						direction?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p59">"You're making fun of me, aren't you?" asked Mitya, looking
						
						haughtily at the speaker; but the latter did not flinch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p60">Mitya turned abruptly, sat astride on his chair, and swung his
						
						arm.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p61">"This was how I struck him! That's how I knocked him down! What
						
						more do you want?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p62">"Thank you. May I trouble you now to explain why you jumped
						
						down, with what object, and what you had in view?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p63">"Oh, hang it!... I jumped down to look at the man I'd hurt... I
						
						don't know what for!"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p64">"Though you were so excited and were running away?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p65">"Yes, though I was excited and running away."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p66">"You wanted to help him?"
						
							"</p><p id="v_6-p67">Help!... Yes, perhaps I did want to help him.... I don't
						
						remember."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p68">"You don't remember? Then you didn't quite know what you were
						
						doing?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p69">"Not at all. I remember everything- every detail. I jumped down to
						
						look at him, and wiped his face with my handkerchief."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p70">"We have seen your handkerchief. Did you hope to restore him to
						
						consciousness?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p71">"I don't know whether I hoped it. I simply wanted to make sure
						
						whether he was alive or not."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p72">"Ah! You wanted to be sure? Well, what then?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p73">"I'm not a doctor. I couldn't decide. I ran away thinking I'd
						
						killed him. And now he's recovered."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p74">"Excellent," commented the prosecutor. "Thank you. That's all I
						
						wanted. Kindly proceed."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p75">Alas! it never entered Mitya's head to tell them, though he
						
						remembered it, that he had jumped back from pity, and standing over
						
						the prostrate figure had even uttered some words of regret: "You've
						
						come to grief, old man- there's no help for it. Well, there you must
						
						lie."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p76">The prosecutor could only draw one conclusion: that the man had
						
						jumped back "at such a moment and in such excitement simply with the
						
						object of ascertaining whether the only witness of his crime were
						
						dead; that he must therefore have been a man of great strength,
						
						coolness, decision, and foresight even at such a moment,"... and so
						
						on. The prosecutor was satisfied: "I've provoked the nervous fellow by
						
						'trifles' and he has said more than he meant With painful effort Mitya
						
						went on. But this time he was pulled up immediately by Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p77">"How came you to run to the servant, Fedosya Markovna, with your
						
						hands so covered with blood, and, as it appears, your face, too?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p78">"Why, I didn't notice the blood at all at the time," answered
						
						Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p79">"That's quite likely. It does happen sometimes." The prosecutor
						
						exchanged glances with Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p80">"I simply didn't notice. You're quite right there, prosecutor,"
						
						Mitya assented suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p81">Next came the account of Mitya's sudden determination to "step
						
						aside" and make way for their happiness. But he could not make up
						
						his mind to open his heart to them as before, and tell them about "the
						
						queen of his soul." He disliked speaking of her before these chilly
						
						persons "who were fastening on him like bugs." And so in response to
						
						their reiterated questions he answered briefly and abruptly:
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p82">"Well, I made up my mind to kill myself. What had I left to live
						
						for? That question stared me in the face. Her first rightful lover had
						
						come back, the man who wronged her but who'd hurried back to offer his
						
						love, after five years, and atone for the wrong with marriage.... So I
						
						knew it was all over for me.... And behind me disgrace, and that
						
						blood- Grigory's.... What had I to live for? So I went to redeem the
						
						pistols I had pledged, to load them and put a bullet in my brain
						
						to-morrow."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p83">"And a grand feast the night before?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p84">"Yes, a grand feast the night before. Damn it all, gentlemen! Do
						
						make haste and finish it. I meant to shoot myself not far from here,
						
						beyond the village, and I'd planned to do it at five o'clock in the
						
						morning. And I had a note in my pocket already. I wrote it at
						
						Perhotin's when I loaded my pistols. Here's the letter. Read it!
						
						It's not for you I tell it," he added contemptuously. He took it
						
						from his waistcoat pocket and flung it on the table. The lawyers
						
						read it with curiosity, and, as is usual, added it to the papers
						
						connected with the case.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p85">"And you didn't even think of washing your hands at Perhotin's?
						
						You were not afraid then of arousing suspicion?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p86">"What suspicion? Suspicion or not, I should have galloped here
						
						just the same, and shot myself at five o'clock, and you wouldn't
						
						have been in time to do anything. If it hadn't been for what's
						
						happened to my father, you would have known nothing about it, and
						
						wouldn't have come here. Oh, it's the devil's doing. It was the
						
						devil murdered father, it was through the devil that you found it
						
						out so soon. How did you manage to get here so quick? It's marvellous,
						
						a dream!"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p87">"Mr. Perhotin informed us that when you came to him, you held in
						
						your hands... your blood-stained hands... your money... a lot of
						
						money... a bundle of hundred-rouble notes, and that his servant-boy
						
						saw it too."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p88">"That's true, gentlemen. I remember it was so."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p89">"Now, there's one little point presents itself. Can you inform
						
						us," Nikolay Parfenovitch began, with extreme gentleness, "where did
						
						you get so much money all of a sudden, when it appears from the facts,
						
						from the reckoning of time, that you had not been home?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p90">The prosecutor's brows contracted at the question being asked so
						
						plainly, but he did not interrupt Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p91">"No, I didn't go home," answered Mitya, apparently perfectly
						
						composed, but looking at the floor.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p92">"Allow me then to repeat my question," Nikolay Parfenovitch went
						
						on as though creeping up to the subject. "Where were you able to
						
						procure such a sum all at once, when by your own confession, at five
						
						o'clock the same day you-"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p93">"I was in want of ten roubles and pledged my pistols with
						
						Perhotin, and then went to Madame Hohlakov to borrow three thousand
						
						which she wouldn't give me, and so on, and all the rest of it,"
						
						Mitya interrupted sharply. "Yes, gentlemen, I was in want of it, and
						
						suddenly thousands turned up, eh? Do you know, gentlemen, you're
						
						both afraid now 'what if he won't tell us where he got it?' That's
						
						just how it is. I'm not going to tell you, gentlemen. You've guessed
						
						right. You'll never know," said Mitya, chipping out each word with
						
						extraordinary determination. The lawyers were silent for a moment.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p94">"You must understand, Mr. Karamazov, that it is of vital
						
						importance for us to know," said Nikolay Parfenovitch, softly and
						
						suavely.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p95">"I understand; but still I won't tell you."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p96">The prosecutor, too, intervened, and again reminded the prisoner
						
						that he was at liberty to refuse to answer questions, if he thought it
						
						to his interest, and so on. But in view of the damage he might do
						
						himself by his silence, especially in a case of such importance as-
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p97">"And so on, gentlemen, and so on. Enough! I've heard that
						
						rigmarole before," Mitya interrupted again. "I can see for myself
						
						how important it is, and that this is the vital point, and still I
						
						won't say."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p98">"What is it to us? It's not our business, but yours. .You are
						
						doing yourself harm," observed Nikolay Parfenovitch nervously.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p99">"You see, gentlemen, joking apart"- Mitya lifted his eyes and
						
						looked firmly at them both- "I had an inkling from the first that we
						
						should come to loggerheads at this point. But at first when I began to
						
						give my evidence, it was all still far away and misty; it was all
						
						floating, and I was so simple that I began with the supposition of
						
						mutual confidence existing between us. Now I can see for myself that
						
						such confidence is out of the question, for in any case we were
						
						bound to come to this cursed stumbling-block. And now we've come to
						
						it! It's impossible and there's an end of it! But I don't blame you.
						
						You can't believe it all simply on my word. I understand that, of
						
						course."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p100">He relapsed into gloomy silence.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p101">"Couldn't you, without abandoning your resolution to be silent
						
						about the chief point, could you not, at the same time, give us some
						
						slight hint as to the nature of the motives which are strong enough to
						
						induce you to refuse to answer, at a crisis so full of danger to you?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p102">Mitya smiled mournfully, almost dreamily.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p103">"I'm much more good-natured than you think, gentlemen. I'll tell
						
						you the reason why and give you that hint, though you don't deserve
						
						it. I won't speak of that, gentlemen, because it would be a stain on
						
						my honour. The answer to the question where I got the money would
						
						expose me to far greater disgrace than the murder and robbing of my
						
						father, if I had murdered and robbed him. That's why I can't tell you.
						
						I can't for fear of disgrace. What, gentlemen, are you going to
						
						write that down?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p104">"Yes, we'll write it down," lisped Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p105">"You ought not to write that down about 'disgrace.' I only told
						
						you that in the goodness of my heart. I needn't have told you. I
						
						made you a present of it, so to speak, and you pounce upon it at once.
						
						Oh, well, write- write what you like," he concluded, with scornful
						
						disgust. "I'm not afraid of you and I can still hold up my head before
						
						you."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p106">"And can't you tell us the nature of that disgrace?" Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch hazarded.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p107">The prosecutor frowned darkly.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p108">"No, no, c'est fini, don't trouble yourselves. It's not worth
						
						while soiling one's hands. I have soiled myself enough through you
						
						as it is. You're not worth it- no one is. Enough, gentlemen. I'm not
						
						going on."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p109">This was said too peremptorily. Nikolay Parfenovitch did not
						
						insist further, but from Ippolit Kirillovitch's eyes he saw that he
						
						had not given up hope.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p110">"Can you not, at least, tell us what sum you had in your hands
						
						when you went into Mr. Perhotin's- how many roubles exactly?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p111">"I can't tell you that."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p112">"You spoke to Mr. Perhotin, I believe, of having received three
						
						thousand from Madame Hohlakov."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p113">"Perhaps I did. Enough, gentlemen. I won't say how much I had."
						
							"</p><p id="v_6-p114">Will you be so good then as to tell us how you came here and what
						
						you have done since you arrived?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p115">"Oh! you might ask the people here about that. But I'll tell you
						
						if you like."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p116">He proceeded to do so, but we won't repeat his story. He told it
						
						dryly and curtly. Of the raptures of his love he said nothing, but
						
						told them that he abandoned his determination to shoot himself,
						
						owing to "new factors in the case." He told the story without going
						
						into motives or details. And this time the lawyers did not worry him
						
						much. It was obvious that there was no essential point of interest
						
						to them here.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p117">"We shall verify all that. We will come back to it during the
						
						examination of the witnesses, which will, of course, take place in
						
						your presence," said Nikolay Parfenovitch in conclusion. "And now
						
						allow me to request you to lay on the table everything in your
						
						possession, especially all the money you still have about you."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p118">"My money, gentlemen? Certainly. I understand that that is
						
						necessary. I'm surprised, indeed, that you haven't inquired about it
						
						before. It's true I couldn't get away anywhere. I'm sitting here where
						
						I can be seen. But here's my money- count it- take it. That's all, I
						
						think."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p119">He turned it all out of his pockets; even the small change- two
						
						pieces of twenty copecks- he pulled out of his waistcoat pocket.
						
						They counted the money, which amounted to eight hundred and thirty-six
						
						roubles, and forty copecks.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p120">"And is that all?" asked the investigating lawyer.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p121">"You stated just now in your evidence that you spent three hundred
						
						roubles at Plotnikovs'. You gave Perhotin ten, your driver twenty,
						
						here you lost two hundred, then..."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p122">Nikolay Parfenovitch reckoned it all up. Mitya helped him readily.
						
						They recollected every farthing and included it in the reckoning.
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch hurriedly added up the total. "With this eight
						
						hundred you must have had about fifteen hundred at first?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p123">"I suppose so," snapped Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p124">"How is it they all assert there was much more?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p125">"Let them assert it."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p126">"But you asserted it yourself."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p127">"Yes, I did, too."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p128">"We will compare all this with the evidence of other persons not
						
						yet examined. Don't be anxious about your money. It will be properly
						
						taken care of and be at your disposal at the conclusion of... what
						
						is beginning... if it appears, or, so to speak, is proved that you
						
						have undisputed right to it. Well, and now..."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p129">Nikolay Parfenovitch suddenly got up, and informed Mitya firmly
						
						that it was his duty and obligation to conduct a minute and thorough
						
						search "of your clothes and everything else..."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p130">"By all means, gentlemen. I'll turn out all my pockets, if you
						
						like."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p131">And he did, in fact, begin turning out his pockets.
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p132">"It will be necessary to take off your clothes, too."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p133">"What! Undress? Ugh! Damn it! Won't you search me as I am? Can't
						
						you?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p134">"It's utterly impossible, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. You must take off
						
						your clothes."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p135">"As you like," Mitya submitted gloomily; "only, please, not
						
						here, but behind the curtains. Who will search them?"
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p136">"Behind the curtains, of course."
						
							</p><p id="v_6-p137">Nikolay Parfenovitch bent his head in assent. His small face
						
						wore an expression of peculiar solemnity.</p>					
					
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - The Prosecutor Catches Mitya" prev="v_6" next="vii_5" id="vi_5">
					
					
					
						<p id="vi_5-p1">SOMETHING utterly unexpected and amazing to Mitya followed. He
						
						could never, even a minute before, have conceived that anyone could
						
						behave like that to him, Mitya Karamazov. What was worst of all, there
						
						was something humiliating in it, and on their side something
						
						"supercilious and scornful." It was nothing to take off his coat,
						
						but he was asked to undress further, or rather not asked but
						
						"commanded," he quite understood that. From pride and contempt he
						
						submitted without a word. Several peasants accompanied the lawyers and
						
						remained on the same side of the curtain. "To be ready if force is
						
						required," thought Mitya, "and perhaps for some other reason, too."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p2">"Well, must I take off my shirt, too?" he asked sharply, but
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch did not answer. He was busily engaged with the
						
						prosecutor in examining the coat, the trousers, the waistcoat and
						
						the cap; and it was evident that they were both much interested in the
						
						scrutiny. "They make no bones about it," thought Mitya, "they don't
						
						keep up the most elementary politeness."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p3">"I ask you for the second time- need I take off my shirt or
						
						not?" he said, still more sharply and irritably.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p4">"Don't trouble yourself. We will tell you what to do," Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch said, and his voice was positively peremptory, or so it
						
						seemed to Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p5">Meantime a consultation was going on in undertones between the
						
						lawyers. There turned out to be on the coat, especially on the left
						
						side at the back, a huge patch of blood, dry, and still stiff. There
						
						were bloodstains on the trousers, too. Nikolay Parfenovitch, moreover,
						
						in the presence of the peasant witnesses, passed his fingers along the
						
						collar, the cuffs, and all the seams of the coat and trousers,
						
						obviously looking for something- money, of course. He didn't even hide
						
						from Mitya his suspicion that he was capable of sewing money up in his
						
						clothes.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p6">"He treats me not as an officer but as a thief," Mitya muttered to
						
						himself. They communicated their ideas to one another with amazing
						
						frankness. The secretary, for instance, who was also behind the
						
						curtain, fussing about and listening, called Nikolay Parfenovitch's
						
						attention to the cap, which they were also fingering.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p7">"You remember Gridyenko, the copying clerk," observed the
						
						secretary. "Last summer he received the wages of the whole office, and
						
						pretended to have lost the money when he was drunk. And where was it
						
						found? Why, in just such pipings in his cap. The hundred-rouble
						
						notes were screwed up in little rolls and sewed in the piping."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p8">Both the lawyers remembered Gridyenko's case perfectly, and so
						
						laid aside Mitya's cap, and decided that all his clothes must be
						
						more thoroughly examined later.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p9">"Excuse me," cried Nikolay Parfenovitch, suddenly, noticing that
						
						the right cuff of Mitya's shirt was turned in, and covered with blood,
						
						"excuse me, what's that, blood?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p10">"Yes," Mitya jerked out.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p11">"That is, what blood?... and why is the cuff turned in?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p12">Mitya told him how he had got the sleeve stained with blood
						
						looking after Grigory, and had turned it inside when he was washing
						
						his hands at Perhotin's.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p13">"You must take off your shirt, too. That's very important as
						
						material evidence."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p14">Mitya flushed red and flew into a rage.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p15">"What, am I to stay naked?" he shouted.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p16">"Don't disturb yourself. We will arrange something. And
						
						meanwhile take off your socks."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p17">"You're not joking? Is that really necessary?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p18">Mitya's eyes flashed.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p19">"We are in no mood for joking," answered Nikolay Parfenovitch
						
						sternly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p20">"Well, if I must-" muttered Mitya, and sitting down on the bed, he
						
						took off his socks. He felt unbearably awkward. All were clothed,
						
						while he was naked, and strange to say, when he was undressed he
						
						felt somehow guilty in their presence, and was almost ready to believe
						
						himself that he was inferior to them, and that now they had a
						
						perfect right to despise him.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p21">"When all are undressed, one is somehow not ashamed, but when
						
						one's the only one undressed and everybody is looking, it's
						
						degrading," he kept repeating to himself, again and again. "It's
						
						like a dream; I've sometimes dreamed of being in such degrading
						
						positions." It was a misery to him to take off his socks. They were
						
						very dirty, and so were his underclothes, and now everyone could see
						
						it. And what was worse, he disliked his feet. All his life he had
						
						thought both his big toes hideous. He particularly loathed the coarse,
						
						flat, crooked nail on the right one, and now they would all see it.
						
						Feeling intolerably ashamed made him, at once and intentionally,
						
						rougher. He pulled off his shirt, himself.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p22">"Would you like to look anywhere else if you're not ashamed to?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p23">"No, there's no need to, at present."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p24">"Well, am I to stay naked like this?" he added savagely.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p25">"Yes, that can't be helped for the time.... Kindly sit down here
						
						for a while. You can wrap yourself in a quilt from the bed, and I...
						
						I'll see to all this."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p26">All the things were shown to the witnesses. The report of the
						
						search was drawn up, and at last Nikolay Parfenovitch went out, and
						
						the clothes were carried out after him. Ippolit Kirillovitch went out,
						
						too. Mitya was left alone with the peasants, who stood in silence,
						
						never taking their eyes off him. Mitya wrapped himself up in the
						
						quilt. He felt cold. His bare feet stuck out, and he couldn't pull the
						
						quilt over so as to cover them. Nikolay Parfenovitch seemed to be gone
						
						a long time, "an insufferable time."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p27">"He thinks of me as a puppy," thought Mitya, gnashing his teeth.
						
						"That rotten prosecutor has gone, too, contemptuous no doubt, it
						
						disgusts him to see me naked!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p28">Mitya imagined, however, that his clothes would be examined and
						
						returned to him. But what was his indignation when Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch came back with quite different clothes, brought in behind
						
						him by a peasant.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p29">"Here are clothes for you," he observed airily, seeming well
						
						satisfied with the success of his mission. "Mr. Kalganov has kindly
						
						provided these for this unusual emergency, as well as a clean shirt.
						
						Luckily he had them all in his trunk. You can keep your own socks
						
						and underclothes."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p30">Mitya flew into a passion.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p31">"I won't have other people's clothes!" he shouted menacingly,
						
						"give me my own!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p32">"It's impossible!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p33">"Give me my own. Damn Kalganov and his clothes, too!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p34">It was a long time before they could persuade him. But they
						
						succeeded somehow in quieting him down. They impressed upon him that
						
						his clothes, being stained with blood, must be "included with the
						
						other material evidence," and that they "had not even the right to let
						
						him have them now... taking into consideration the possible outcome of
						
						the case." Mitya at last understood this. He subsided into gloomy
						
						silence and hurriedly dressed himself. He merely observed, as he put
						
						them on, that the clothes were much better than his old ones, and that
						
						he disliked "gaining by the change." The coat was, besides,
						
						"ridiculously tight. Am I to be dressed up like a fool... for your
						
						amusement?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p35">They urged upon him again that he was exaggerating, that
						
						Kalganov was only a little taller, so that only the trousers might
						
						be a little too long. But the coat turned out to be really tight in
						
						the shoulders.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p36">"Damn it all! I can hardly button it," Mitya grumbled. "Be so good
						
						as to tell Mr. Kalganov from me that I didn't ask for his clothes, and
						
						it's not my doing that they've dressed me up like a clown."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p37">"He understands that, and is sorry... I mean, not sorry to lend
						
						you his clothes, but sorry about all this business," mumbled Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p38">"Confound his sorrow! Well, where now? Am I to go on sitting
						
						here?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p39">He was asked to go back to the "other room." Mitya went in,
						
						scowling with anger, and trying to avoid looking at anyone. Dressed in
						
						another man's clothes he felt himself disgraced, even in the eyes of
						
						the peasants, and of Trifon Borissovitch, whose face appeared, for
						
						some reason, in the doorway, and vanished immediately. "He's come to
						
						look at me dressed up," thought Mitya. He sat down on the same chair
						
						as before. He had an absurd nightmarish feeling, as though he were out
						
						of his mind.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p40">"Well, what now? Are you going to flog me? That's all that's
						
						left for you," he said, clenching his teeth and addressing the
						
						prosecutor. He would not turn to Nikolay Parfenovitch, as though he
						
						disdained to speak to him.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p41">"He looked too closely at my socks, and turned them inside out
						
						on purpose to show everyone how dirty they were- the scoundrel!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p42">"Well, now we must proceed to the examination of witnesses,"
						
						observed Nikolay Parfenovitch, as though in reply to Mitya's question.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p43">"Yes," said the prosecutor thoughtfully, as though reflecting on
						
						something.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p44">"We've done what we could in your interest, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch," Nikolay Parfenovitch went on, "but having received from
						
						you such an uncompromising refusal to explain to us the source from
						
						which you obtained the money found upon you, we are, at the present
						
						moment-"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p45">"What is the stone in your ring?" Mitya interrupted suddenly, as
						
						though awakening from a reverie. He pointed to one of the three
						
						large rings adorning Nikolay Parfenovitch's right hand.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p46">"Ring?" repeated Nikolay Parfenovitch with surprise.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p47">"Yes, that one... on your middle finger, with the little veins
						
						in it, what stone is that?" Mitya persisted, like a peevish child.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p48">"That's a smoky topaz," said Nikolay Parfenovitch, smiling. "Would
						
						you like to look at it? I'll take it off..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p49">"No, don't take it off," cried Mitya furiously, suddenly waking
						
						up, and angry with himself. "Don't take it off... there's no
						
						need.... Damn it!... Gentlemen, you've sullied my heart! Can you
						
						suppose that I would conceal it from you, if I had really killed my
						
						father, that I would shuffle, lie, and hide myself? No, that's not
						
						like Dmitri Karamazov, that he couldn't do, and if I were guilty, I
						
						swear I shouldn't have waited for your coming, or for the sunrise as I
						
						meant at first, but should have killed myself before this, without
						
						waiting for the dawn! I know that about myself now. I couldn't have
						
						learnt so much in twenty years as I've found out in this accursed
						
						night!... And should I have been like this on this night, and at
						
						this moment, sitting with you, could I have talked like this, could
						
						I have moved like this, could I have looked at you and at the world
						
						like this, if I had really been the murderer of my father, when the
						
						very thought of having accidentally killed Grigory gave me no peace
						
						all night- not from fear- oh, not simply from fear of your punishment!
						
						The disgrace of it! And you expect me to be open with such scoffers as
						
						you, who see nothing and believe in nothing, blind moles and scoffers,
						
						and to tell you another nasty thing I've done, another disgrace,
						
						even if that would save me from your accusation! No, better Siberia!
						
						The man who opened the door to my father and went in at that door,
						
						he killed him, he robbed him. Who was he? I'm racking my brains and
						
						can't think who. But I can tell you it was not Dmitri Karamazov, and
						
						that's all I can tell you, and that's enough, enough, leave me
						
						alone.... Exile me, punish me, but don't bother me any more. I'll
						
						say no more. Call your witnesses!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p50">Mitya uttered his sudden monologue as though he were determined to
						
						be absolutely silent for the future. The prosecutor watched him the
						
						whole time and only when he had ceased speaking, observed, as though
						
						it were the most ordinary thing, with the most frigid and composed
						
						air:
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p51">"Oh, about the open door of which you spoke just now, we may as
						
						well inform you, by the way, now, of a very interesting piece of
						
						evidence of the greatest importance both to you and to us, that has
						
						been given us by Grigory, the old man you wounded. On his recovery, he
						
						clearly and emphatically stated, in reply to our questions, that when,
						
						on coming out to the steps, and hearing a noise in the garden, he made
						
						up his mind to go into it through the little gate which stood open,
						
						before he noticed you running, as you have told us already, in the
						
						dark from the open window where you saw your father, he, Grigory,
						
						glanced to the left, and, while noticing the open window, observed
						
						at the same time, much nearer to him, the door, standing wide open-
						
						that door which you have stated to have been shut the whole time you
						
						were in the garden. I will not conceal from you that Grigory himself
						
						confidently affirms and bears witness that you must have run from that
						
						door, though, of course, he did not see you do so with his own eyes,
						
						since he only noticed you first some distance away in the garden,
						
						running towards the fence."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p52">Mitya had leapt up from his chair half-way through this speech.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p53">"Nonsense!" he yelled, in a sudden frenzy, "it's a barefaced
						
						lie. He couldn't have seen the door open because it was shut. He's
						
						lying!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p54">"I consider it my duty to repeat that he is firm in his statement.
						
						He does not waver. He adheres to it. We've cross-examined him
						
						several times."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p55">"Precisely. I have cross-examined him several times," Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch confirmed warmly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p56">"It's false, false! It's either an attempt to slander me, or the
						
						hallucination of a madman," Mitya still shouted. "He's simply
						
						raving, from loss of blood, from the wound. He must have fancied it
						
						when he came to.... He's raving."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p57">"Yes, but he noticed the open door, not when he came to after
						
						his injuries, but before that, as soon as he went into the garden from
						
						the lodge."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p58">"But it's false, it's false! It can't be so! He's slandering me
						
						from spite.... He couldn't have seen it... I didn't come from the
						
						door," gasped Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p59">The prosecutor turned to Nikolay Parfenovitch and said to him
						
						impressively:
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p60">"Confront him with it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p61">"Do you recognise this object?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p62">Nikolay Parfenovitch laid upon the table a large and thick
						
						official envelope, on which three seals still remained intact. The
						
						envelope was empty, and slit open at one end. Mitya stared at it
						
						with open eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p63">"It... it must be that envelope of my father's, the envelope
						
						that contained the three thousand roubles... and if there's
						
						inscribed on it, allow me, 'For my little chicken'... yes- three
						
						thousand!" he shouted, "do you see, three thousand, do you see?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p64">"Of course, we see. But we didn't find the money in it. It was
						
						empty, and lying on the floor by the bed, behind the screen."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p65">For some seconds Mitya stood as though thunderstruck.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p66">"Gentlemen, it's Smerdyakov!" he shouted suddenly, at the top of
						
						his voice. "It's he who's murdered him! He's robbed him! No one else
						
						knew where the old man hid the envelope. It's Smerdyakov, that's
						
						clear, now!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p67">"But you, too, knew of the envelope and that it was under the
						
						pillow."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p68">"I never knew it. I've never seen it. This is the first time
						
						I've looked at it. I'd only heard of it from Smerdyakov.... He was the
						
						only one who knew where the old man kept it hidden, I didn't
						
						know..." Mitya was completely breathless.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p69">"But you told us yourself that the envelope was under your
						
						deceased father's pillow. You especially stated that it was under
						
						the pillow, so you must have known it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p70">"We've got it written down," confirmed Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p71">"Nonsense! It's absurd! I'd no idea it was under the pillow. And
						
						perhaps it wasn't under the pillow at all.... It was just a chance
						
						guess that it was under the pillow. What does Smerdyakov say? Have you
						
						asked him where it was? What does Smerdyakov say? That's the chief
						
						point.... And I went out of my way to tell lies against myself.... I
						
						told you without thinking that it was under the pillow, and now you-
						
						Oh, you know how one says the wrong thing, without meaning it. No
						
						one knew but Smerdyakov, only Smerdyakov, and no one else.... He
						
						didn't even tell me where it was! But it's his doing, his doing;
						
						there's no doubt about it, he murdered him, that's as clear as
						
						daylight now," Mitya exclaimed more and more frantically, repeating
						
						himself incoherently, and growing more and more exasperated and
						
						excited. "You must understand that, and arrest him at once.... He must
						
						have killed him while I was running away and while Grigory was
						
						unconscious, that's clear now.... He gave the signal and father opened
						
						to him... for no one but he knew the signal, and without the signal
						
						father would never have opened the door...."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p72">"But you're again forgetting the circumstance," the prosecutor
						
						observed, still speaking with the same restraint, though with a note
						
						of triumph, "that there was no need to give the signal if the door
						
						already stood open when you were there, while you were in the
						
						garden..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p73">"The door, the door," muttered Mitya, and he stared speechless
						
						at the prosecutor. He sank back helpless in his chair. All were
						
						silent.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p74">"Yes, the door!... It's a nightmare! God is against me!" he
						
						exclaimed, staring before him in complete stupefaction.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p75">"Come, you see," the prosecutor went on with dignity, "and you can
						
						judge for yourself, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. On the one hand, we have
						
						the evidence of the open door from which you ran out, a fact which
						
						overwhelms you and us. On the other side, your incomprehensible,
						
						persistent, and, so to speak, obdurate silence with regard to the
						
						source from which you obtained the money which was so suddenly seen in
						
						your hands, when only three hours earlier, on your own showing, you
						
						pledged your pistols for the sake of ten roubles! In view of all these
						
						facts, judge for yourself. What are we to believe, and what can we
						
						depend upon? And don't accuse us of being 'frigid, cynical, scoffing
						
						people,' who are incapable of believing in the generous impulses of
						
						your heart.... Try to enter into our position..."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p76">Mitya was indescribably agitated. He turned pale.
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p77">"Very well!" he exclaimed suddenly, "I will tell you my secret.
						
						I'll tell you where I got the money!... I'll reveal my shame, that I
						
						may not have to blame myself or you hereafter."
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p78">"And believe me, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," put in Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch, in a voice of almost pathetic delight, "that every
						
						sincere and complete confession on your part at this moment may, later
						
						on, have an immense influence in your favour, and may, indeed,
						
						moreover-"
						
							</p><p id="vi_5-p79">But the prosecutor gave him a slight shove under the table, and he
						
						checked himself in time. Mitya, it is true, had not heard him.</p>
					
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - Mitya's Great Secret Received with Hisses" prev="vi_5" next="viii_3" id="vii_5">
					
					
							<p id="vii_5-p1">"GENTLEMEN," he began, still in the same agitation, "I want to
						
						make a full confession: that money was my own."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p2">The lawyer's faces lengthened. That was not at all what they
						
						expected.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p3">"How do you mean?" faltered Nikolay Parfenovitch, "when at five
						
						o'clock on the same day, from your own confession-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p4">"Damn five o'clock on the same day and my own confession! That's
						
						nothing to do with it now! That money was my own, my own, that is,
						
						stolen by me...not mine, I mean, but stolen by me, and it was
						
						fifteen hundred roubles, and I had it on me all the time, all the
						
						time..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p5">"But where did you get it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p6">"I took it off my neck, gentlemen, off this very neck... it was
						
						here, round my neck, sewn up in a rag, and I'd had it round my neck
						
						a long time, it's a month since I put it round my neck... to my
						
						shame and disgrace!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p7">"And from whom did you... appropriate it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p8">"You mean, 'steal it'? Speak out plainly now. Yes, I consider that
						
						I practically stole it, but, if you prefer, I 'appropriated it.' I
						
						consider I stole it. And last night I stole it finally."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p9">"Last night? But you said that it's a month since you...
						
						obtained it?..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p10">"Yes. But not from my father. Not from my father, don't be uneasy.
						
						I didn't steal it from my father, but from her. Let me tell you
						
						without interrupting. It's hard to do, you know. You see, a month ago,
						
						I was sent for by Katerina Ivanovna, formerly my betrothed. Do you
						
						know her?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p11">"Yes, of course."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p12">"I know you know her. She's a noble creature, noblest of the
						
						noble. But she has hated me ever so long, oh, ever so long... and
						
						hated me with good reason, good reason!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p13">"Katerina Ivanovna!" Nikolay Parfenovitch exclaimed with wonder.
						
						The prosecutor, too, stared.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p14">"Oh, don't take her name in vain! I'm a scoundrel to bring her
						
						into it. Yes, I've seen that she hated me... a long while.... From the
						
						very first, even that evening at my lodging... but enough, enough.
						
						You're unworthy even to know of that. No need of that at all.... I
						
						need only tell you that she sent for me a month ago, gave me three
						
						thousand roubles to send off to her sister and another relation in
						
						Moscow (as though she couldn't have sent it off herself!) and I...
						
						it was just at that fatal moment in my life when I... well, in fact,
						
						when I'd just come to love another, her, she's sitting down below now,
						
						Grushenka. I carried her off here to Mokroe then, and wasted here in
						
						two days half that damned three thousand, but the other half I kept on
						
						me. Well, I've kept that other half, that fifteen hundred, like a
						
						locket round my neck, but yesterday I undid it, and spent it. What's
						
						left of it, eight hundred roubles, is in your hands now, Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch. That's the change out of the fifteen hundred I had
						
						yesterday."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p15">"Excuse me. How's that? Why, when you were here a month ago you
						
						spent three thousand, not fifteen hundred, everybody knows that."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p16">"Who knows it? Who counted the money? Did I let anyone count it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p17">"Why, you told everyone yourself that you'd spent exactly three
						
						thousand."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p18">"It's true, I did. I told the whole town so, and the whole town
						
						said so. And here, at Mokroe, too, everyone reckoned it was three
						
						thousand. Yet I didn't spend three thousand, but fifteen hundred.
						
						And the other fifteen hundred I sewed into a little bag. That's how it
						
						was, gentlemen. That's where I got that money yesterday...."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p19">"This is almost miraculous," murmured Nikolay Parfenovitch.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p20">"Allow me to inquire," observed the prosecutor at last, "have
						
						you informed anyone whatever of this circumstance before; I mean
						
						that you had fifteen hundred left about you a month ago?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p21">"I told no one."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p22">"That's strange. Do you mean absolutely no one?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p23">"Absolutely no one. No one and nobody."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p24">"What was your reason for this reticence? What was your motive for
						
						making such a secret of it? To be more precise: You have told us at
						
						last your secret, in your words, so 'disgraceful,' though in
						
						reality- that is, of course, comparatively speaking- this action, that
						
						is, the appropriation of three thousand roubles belonging to someone
						
						else, and, of course, only for a time is, in my view at least, only an
						
						act of the greatest recklessness and not so disgraceful, when one
						
						takes into consideration your character.... Even admitting that it was
						
						an action in the highest degree discreditable, still, discreditable is
						
						not 'disgraceful.'... Many people have already guessed, during this
						
						last month, about the three thousand of Katerina Ivanovna's that you
						
						have spent, and I heard the legend myself, apart from your
						
						confession.... Mihail Makarovitch, for instance, had heard it, too, so
						
						that indeed, it was scarcely a legend, but the gossip of the whole
						
						town. There are indications, too, if I am not mistaken, that you
						
						confessed this yourself to someone, I mean that the money was Katerina
						
						Ivanovna's, and so, it's extremely surprising to me that hitherto,
						
						that is, up to the present moment, you have made such an extraordinary
						
						secret of the fifteen hundred you say you put by, apparently
						
						connecting a feeling of positive horror with that secret.... It's
						
						not easy to believe that it could cost you such distress to confess
						
						such a secret.... You cried out, just now, that Siberia would be
						
						better than confessing it..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p25">The prosecutor ceased speaking. He was provoked. He did not
						
						conceal his vexation, which was almost anger, and gave vent to all his
						
						accumulated spleen, disconnectedly and incoherently, without
						
						choosing words.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p26">"It's not the fifteen hundred that's the disgrace, but that I
						
						put it apart from the rest of the three thousand," said Mitya firmly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p27">"Why?" smiled the prosecutor irritably. "What is there
						
						disgraceful, to your thinking, in your having set aside half of the
						
						three thousand you had discreditably, if you prefer,
						
						'disgracefully,' appropriated? Your taking the three thousand is
						
						more important than what you did with it. And by the way, why did
						
						you do that- why did you set apart that half, for what purpose, for
						
						what object did you do it? Can you explain that to us?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p28">"Oh, gentlemen, the purpose is the whole point!" cried Mitya. "I
						
						put it aside because I was vile, that is, because I was calculating,
						
						and to be calculating in such a case is vile... and that vileness
						
						has been going on a whole month."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p29">"It's incomprehensible."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p30">"I wonder at you. But I'll make it clearer. Perhaps it really is
						
						incomprehensible. You see, attend to what I say. I appropriate three
						
						thousand entrusted to my honour; I spend it on a spree, say I spend it
						
						all, and next morning I go to her and say, 'Katya, I've done wrong,
						
						I've squandered your three thousand'; well, is that right? No, it's
						
						not right- it's dishonest and cowardly; I'm a beast, with no more
						
						self-control than a beast, that's so, isn't it? But still I'm not a
						
						thief? Not a downright thief, you'll admit! I squandered it, but I
						
						didn't steal it. Now a second, rather more favourable alternative:
						
						follow me carefully, or I may get confused again- my head's going
						
						round- and so, for the second alternative: I spend here only fifteen
						
						hundred out of the three thousand, that is, only half. Next day I go
						
						and take that half to her: 'Katya, take this fifteen hundred from
						
						me, I'm a low beast, and an untrustworthy scoundrel, for I've wasted
						
						half the money, and I shall waste this, too, so keep me from
						
						temptation!' Well, what of that alternative? I should be a beast and a
						
						scoundrel, and whatever you like; but not a thief, not altogether a
						
						thief, or I should not have brought back what was left, but have
						
						kept that, too. She would see at once that since I brought back
						
						half, I should pay back what I'd spent, that I should never give up
						
						trying to, that I should work to get it and pay it back. So in that
						
						case I should be a scoundrel, but not a thief, you may say what you
						
						like, not a thief!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p31">"I admit that there is a certain distinction," said the
						
						prosecutor, with a cold smile. "But it's strange that you see such a
						
						vital difference."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p32">"Yes, I see a vital difference. Every man may be a scoundrel,
						
						and perhaps every man is a scoundrel, but not everyone can be a thief;
						
						it takes an arch-scoundrel to be that. Oh, of course, I don't know how
						
						to make these fine distinctions... but a thief is lower than a
						
						scoundrel, that's my conviction. Listen, I carry the money about me
						
						a whole month; I may make up my mind to give it back to-morrow, and
						
						I'm a scoundrel no longer; but I cannot make up my mind, you see,
						
						though I'm making up my mind every day, and every day spurring
						
						myself on to do it, and yet for a whole month I can't bring myself
						
						to it, you see. Is that right to your thinking, is that right?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p33">"Certainly, that's not right; that I can quite understand, and
						
						that I don't dispute," answered the prosecutor with reserve. "And
						
						let us give up all discussion of these subtleties and distinctions,
						
						and, if you will be so kind, get back to the point. And the point
						
						is, that you have still not told us, although we've asked you, why, in
						
						the first place, you halved the money, squandering one half and hiding
						
						the other? For what purpose exactly did you hide it, what did you mean
						
						to do with that fifteen hundred? I insist upon that question, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p34">"Yes, of course!" cried Mitya, striking himself on the forehead;
						
						"forgive me, I'm worrying you, and am not explaining the chief
						
						point, or you'd understand in a minute, for it's just the motive of it
						
						that's the disgrace! You see, it was all to do with the old man, my
						
						dead father. He was always pestering Agrafena and I was jealous; I
						
						thought then that she was hesitating between me and him. So I kept
						
						thinking everyday, suppose she were to make up her mind all of a
						
						sudden, suppose she were to leave off tormenting me, and were suddenly
						
						to say to me, 'I love you, not him; take me to the other end of the
						
						world.' And I'd only forty copecks; how could I take her away, what
						
						could I do? Why, I'd be lost. You see, I didn't know her then, I
						
						didn't understand her, I thought she wanted money, and that she
						
						wouldn't forgive my poverty. And so I fiendishly counted out the
						
						half of that three thousand, sewed it up, calculating on it, sewed
						
						it up before I was drunk, and after I had sewn it up, I went off to
						
						get drunk on the rest. Yes, that was base. Do you understand now?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p35">Both the lawyers laughed aloud.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p36">"I should have called it sensible and moral on your part not to
						
						have squandered it all," chuckled Nikolay Parfenovitch, "for after all
						
						what does it amount to?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p37">"Why, that I stole it, that's what it amounts to! Oh, God, you
						
						horrify me by not understanding! Every day that I had that fifteen
						
						hundred sewn up round my neck, every day and every hour I said to
						
						myself, 'You're a thief! you're a thief!' Yes, that's why I've been so
						
						savage all this month, that's why I fought in the tavern, that's why I
						
						attacked my father, it was because I felt I was a thief. I couldn't
						
						make up my mind; I didn't dare even to tell Alyosha, my brother, about
						
						that fifteen hundred: I felt I was such a scoundrel and such a
						
						pickpocket. But, do you know, while I carried it I said to myself at
						
						the same time every hour: 'No, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, you may yet not be
						
						a thief.' Why? Because I might go next day and pay back that fifteen
						
						hundred to Katya. And only yesterday I made up my mind to tear my
						
						amulet off my neck, on my way from Fenya's to Perhotin. I hadn't
						
						been able till that moment to bring myself to it. And it was only when
						
						I tore it off that I became a downright thief, a thief and a dishonest
						
						man for the rest of my life. Why? Because, with that I destroyed, too,
						
						my dream of going to Katya and saying, 'I'm a scoundrel, but not a
						
						thief! Do you understand now? Do you understand?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p38">"What was it made you decide to do it yesterday?" Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch interrupted.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p39">"Why? It's absurd to ask. Because I had condemned myself to die at
						
						five o'clock this morning, here, at dawn. I thought it made no
						
						difference whether I died a thief or a man of honour. But I see it's
						
						not so, it turns out that it does make a difference. Believe me,
						
						gentlemen, what has tortured me most during this night has not been
						
						the thought that I'd killed the old servant, and that I was in
						
						danger of Siberia just when my love was being rewarded, and Heaven was
						
						open to me again. Oh, that did torture me, but not in the same way;
						
						not so much as the damned consciousness that I had torn that damned
						
						money off my breast at last and spent it, and had become a downright
						
						thief! Oh, gentlemen, I tell you again, with a bleeding heart, I
						
						have learnt a great deal this night. I have learnt that it's not
						
						only impossible to live a scoundrel, but impossible to die a
						
						scoundrel.... No, gentlemen, one must die honest..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p40">Mitya was pale. His face had a haggard and exhausted look, in
						
						spite of his being intensely excited.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p41">"I am beginning to understand you, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," the
						
						prosecutor said slowly, a soft and almost compassionate tone. "But all
						
						this, if you'll excuse my saying so, is a matter of nerves, in my
						
						opinion... your overwrought nerves, that's what it is. And why, for
						
						instance, should you not have saved yourself such misery for almost
						
						a month, by going and returning that fifteen hundred to the lady who
						
						had entrusted it to you? And why could you not have explained things
						
						to her, and in view of your position, which you describe as being so
						
						awful, why could you not have had recourse to the plan which would
						
						so naturally have occurred to one's mind, that is, after honourably
						
						confessing your errors to her, why could you not have asked her to
						
						lend you the sum needed for your expenses, which, with her generous
						
						heart, she would certainly not have refused you in your distress,
						
						especially if it had been with some guarantee, or even on the security
						
						you offered to the merchant Samsonov, and to Madame Hohlakov? I
						
						suppose you still regard that security as of value?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p42">Mitya suddenly crimsoned.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p43">"Surely you don't think me such an out and out scoundrel as
						
						that? You can't be speaking in earnest?" he said, with indignation,
						
						looking the prosecutor straight in the face, and seeming unable to
						
						believe his ears.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p44">"I assure you I'm in earnest... Why do you imagine I'm not
						
						serious?" It was the prosecutor's turn to be surprised.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p45">"Oh, how base that would have been! Gentlemen, do you know, you
						
						are torturing me! Let me tell you everything, so be it. I'll confess
						
						all my infernal wickedness, but to put you to shame, and you'll be
						
						surprised yourselves at the depth of ignominy to which a medley of
						
						human passions can sink. You must know that I already had that plan
						
						myself, that plan you spoke of, just now, prosecutor! Yes,
						
						gentlemen, I, too, have had that thought in my mind all this current
						
						month, so that I was on the point of deciding to go to Katya- I was
						
						mean enough for that. But to go to her, to tell her of my treachery,
						
						and for that very treachery, to carry it out, for the expenses of that
						
						treachery, to beg for money from her, Katya (to beg, do you hear, to
						
						beg), and go straight from her to run away with the other, the
						
						rival, who hated and insulted her- to think of it! You must be mad,
						
						prosecutor!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p46">"Mad I am not, but I did speak in haste, without thinking... of
						
						that feminine jealousy... if there could be jealousy in this case,
						
						as you assert... yes, perhaps there is something of the kind," said
						
						the prosecutor, smiling.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p47">"But that would have been so infamous!" Mitya brought his fist
						
						down on the table fiercely. "That would have been filthy beyond
						
						everything! Yes, do you know that she might have given me that
						
						money, yes, and she would have given it, too; she'd have been
						
						certain to give it, to be revenged on me, she'd have given it to
						
						satisfy her vengeance, to show her contempt for me, for hers is an
						
						infernal nature, too, and she's a woman of great wrath. I'd have taken
						
						the money, too, oh, I should have taken it; I should have taken it,
						
						and then, for the rest of my life... oh, God! Forgive me, gentlemen,
						
						I'm making such an outcry because I've had that thought in my mind
						
						so lately, only the day before yesterday, that night when I was having
						
						all that bother with Lyagavy, and afterwards yesterday, all day
						
						yesterday, I remember, till that happened..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p48">"Till what happened?" put in Nikolay Parfenovitch inquisitively,
						
						but Mitya did not hear it.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p49">"I have made you an awful confession," Mitya said gloomily in
						
						conclusion. "You must appreciate it, and what's more, you must respect
						
						it, for if not, if that leaves your souls untouched, then you've
						
						simply no respect for me, gentlemen, I tell you that, and I shall
						
						die of shame at having confessed it to men like you! Oh, I shall shoot
						
						myself! Yes, I see, I see already that you don't believe me. What, you
						
						want to write that down, too?" he cried in dismay.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p50">"Yes, what you said just now," said Nikolay Parfenovitch,
						
						looking at him surprise, "that is, that up to the last hour you were
						
						still contemplating going to Katerina Ivanovna to beg that sum from
						
						her.... I assure you, that's a very important piece of evidence for
						
						us, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, I mean for the whole case... and particularly
						
						for you, particularly important for you."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p51">"Have mercy, gentlemen!" Mitya flung up his hands. "Don't write
						
						that, anyway; have some shame. Here I've torn my heart asunder
						
						before you, and you seize the opportunity and are fingering the wounds
						
						in both halves.... Oh, my God!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p52">In despair he hid his face in his hands.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p53">"Don't worry yourself so, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," observed the
						
						prosecutor, "everything that is written down will be read over to
						
						you afterwards, and what you don't agree to we'll alter as you like.
						
						But now I'll ask you one little question for the second time. Has no
						
						one, absolutely no one, heard from you of that money you sewed up?
						
						That, I must tell you, is almost impossible to believe."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p54">"No one, no one, I told you so before, or you've not understood
						
						anything! Let me alone!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p55">"Very well, this matter is bound to be explained, and there's
						
						plenty of time for it, but meantime, consider; we have perhaps a dozen
						
						witnesses that you yourself spread it abroad, and even shouted
						
						almost everywhere about the three thousand you'd spent here; three
						
						thousand, not fifteen hundred. And now, too, when you got hold of
						
						the money you had yesterday, you gave many people to understand that
						
						you had brought three thousand with you."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p56">"You've got not dozens, but hundreds of witnesses, two hundred
						
						witnesses, two hundred have heard it, thousands have heard it!"
						
						cried Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p57">"Well, you see, all bear witness to it. And the word all means
						
						something."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p58">"It means nothing. I talked rot, and everyone began repeating it."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p59">"But what need had you to 'talk rot,' as you call it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p60">"The devil knows. From bravado perhaps... at having wasted so much
						
						money.... To try and forget that money I had sewn up, perhaps...
						
						yes, that was why... damn it... how often will you ask me that
						
						question? Well, I told a fib, and that was the end of it; once I'd
						
						said it, I didn't care to correct it. What does a man tell lies for
						
						sometimes?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p61">"That's very difficult to decide, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, what
						
						makes a man tell lies," observed the prosecutor impressively. "Tell
						
						me, though, was that 'amulet,' as you call it, on your neck, a big
						
						thing?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p62">"No, not big."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p63">"How big, for instance?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p64">"If you fold a hundred-rouble note in half, that would be the
						
						size."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p65">"You'd better show us the remains of it. You must have them
						
						somewhere."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p66">"Damnation, what nonsense! I don't know where they are."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p67">"But excuse me: where and when did you take it off your neck?
						
						According to your own evidence you didn't go home."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p68">"When I was going from Fenya's to Perhotin's, on the way I tore it
						
						off my neck and took out the money."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p69">"In the dark?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p70">"What should I want a light for? I did it with my fingers in one
						
						minute."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p71">"Without scissors, in the street?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p72">"In the market-place I think it was. Why scissors? It was an old
						
						rag. It was torn in a minute."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p73">"Where did you put it afterwards?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p74">"I dropped it there."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p75">"Where was it, exactly?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p76">"In the market-place, in the market-place! The devil knows
						
						whereabouts. What do you want to know for?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p77">"That's extremely important, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. It would be
						
						material evidence in your favour. How is it you don't understand that?
						
						Who helped you to sew it up a month ago?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p78">"No one helped me. I did it myself."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p79">"Can you sew?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p80">"A soldier has to know how to sew. No knowledge was needed to do
						
						that."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p81">"Where did you get the material, that is, the rag in which you
						
						sewed the money?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p82">"Are you laughing at me?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p83">"Not at all. And we are in no mood for laughing, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p84">"I don't know where I got the rag from- somewhere, I suppose."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p85">"I should have thought you couldn't have forgotten it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p86">"Upon my word, I don't remember. I might have torn a bit off my
						
						linen."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p87">"That's very interesting. We might find in your lodgings to-morrow
						
						the shirt or whatever it is from which you tore the rag. What sort
						
						of rag was it, cloth or linen?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p88">"Goodness only knows what it was. Wait a bit... I believe I didn't
						
						tear it off anything. It was a bit of calico.... I believe I sewed
						
						it up in a cap of my landlady's."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p89">"In your landlady's cap?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p90">"Yes. I took it from her."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p91">"How did you get it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p92">"You see, I remember once taking a cap for a rag, perhaps to
						
						wipe my pen on. I took it without asking, because it was a worthless
						
						rag. I tore it up, and I took the notes and sewed them up in it. I
						
						believe it was in that very rag I sewed them. An old piece of
						
						calico, washed a thousand times."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p93">"And you remember that for certain now?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p94">"I don't know whether for certain. I think it was in the cap. But,
						
						hang it, what does it matter?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p95">"In that case your landlady will remember that the thing was
						
						lost?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p96">"No, she won't, she didn't miss it. It was an old rag, I tell you,
						
						an old rag not worth a farthing."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p97">"And where did you get the needle and thread?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p98">"I'll stop now. I won't say any more. Enough of it!" said Mitya,
						
						losing his temper at last.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p99">"It's strange that you should have so completely forgotten where
						
						you threw the pieces in the market-place."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p100">"Give orders for the market-place to be swept to-morrow, and
						
						perhaps you'll find it," said Mitya sneering. "Enough, gentlemen,
						
						enough!" he decided, in an exhausted voice. "I see you don't believe
						
						me! Not for a moment! It's my fault, not yours. I ought not to have
						
						been so ready. Why, why did I degrade myself by confessing my secret
						
						to you? it's a joke to you. I see that from your eyes. You led me on
						
						to it, prosecutor! Sing a hymn of triumph if you can.... Damn you, you
						
						torturers!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p101">He bent his head, and hid his face in his hands. The lawyers
						
						were silent. A minute later he raised his head and looked at them
						
						almost vacantly. His face now expressed complete, hopeless despair,
						
						and he sat mute and passive as though hardly conscious of what was
						
						happening. In the meantime they had to finish what they were about.
						
						They had immediately to begin examining the witnesses. It was by now
						
						eight o'clock in the morning. The lights had been extinguished long
						
						ago. Mihail Makarovitch and Kalganov, who had been continually in
						
						and out of the room all the while the interrogation had been going on,
						
						had now both gone out again. The lawyers, too, looked very tired. It
						
						was a wretched morning, the whole sky was overcast, and the rain
						
						streamed down in bucketfuls. Mitya gazed blankly out of window.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p102">"May I look out of window?" he asked Nikolay Parfenovitch,
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p103">"Oh, as much as you like," the latter replied.
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p104">Mitya got up and went to the window.... The rain lashed against
						
						its little greenish panes. He could see the muddy road just below
						
						the house, and farther away, in the rain and mist, a row of poor,
						
						black, dismal huts, looking even blacker and poorer in the rain. Mitya
						
						thought of "Phoebus the golden-haired, and how he had meant to shoot
						
						himself at his first ray. "Perhaps it would be even better on a
						
						morning like this," he thought with a smile, and suddenly, flinging
						
						his hand downwards, he turned to his "torturers."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p105">"Gentlemen," he cried, "I see that I am lost! But she? Tell me
						
						about her, I beseech you. Surely she need not be ruined with me? She's
						
						innocent, you know, she was out of her mind when she cried last
						
						night 'It's all my fault!' She's done nothing, nothing! I've been
						
						grieving over her all night as I sat with you.... Can't you, won't you
						
						tell me what you are going to do with her now?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p106">"You can set your mind quite at rest on that score, Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch," the prosecutor answered at once, with evident alacrity.
						
						"We have, so far, no grounds for interfering with the lady in whom you
						
						are so interested. I trust that it may be the same in the later
						
						development of the case.... On the contrary, we'll do everything
						
						that lies in our power in that matter. Set your mind completely at
						
						rest."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p107">"Gentlemen, I thank you. I knew that you were honest,
						
						straightforward people in spite of everything. You've taken a load off
						
						my heart.... Well, what are we to do now? I'm ready."
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p108">"Well, we ought to make haste. We must pass to examining the
						
						witnesses without delay. That must be done in your presence and
						
						therefore-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p109">"Shouldn't we have some tea first?" interposed Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch, "I think we've deserved it!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_5-p110">They decided that if tea were ready downstairs (Mihail Makarovitch
						
						had, no doubt, gone down to get some) they would have a glass and then
						
						"go on and on," putting off their proper breakfast until a more
						
						favourable opportunity. Tea really was ready below, and was soon
						
						brought up. Mitya at first refused the glass that Nikolay Parfenovitch
						
						politely offered him, but afterwards he asked for it himself and drank
						
						it greedily. He looked surprisingly exhausted. It might have been
						
						supposed from his Herculean strength that one night of carousing, even
						
						accompanied by the most violent emotions, could have had little effect
						
						on him. But he felt that he could hardly hold his head up, and from
						
						time to time all the objects about him seemed heaving and dancing
						
						before his eyes. "A little more and I shall begin raving," he said
						
						to himself.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 8 - The Evidences of the Witnesses. The Babe" prev="vii_5" next="ix_1" id="viii_3">
					
							<p id="viii_3-p1">THE examination of the witnesses began. But we will not continue
						
						our story in such detail as before. And so we will not dwell on how
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch impressed on every witness called that he must
						
						give his evidence in accordance with truth and conscience, and that he
						
						would afterwards have to repeat his evidence on oath, how every
						
						witness was called upon to sign the protocol of his evidence, and so
						
						on. We will only note that the point principally insisted upon in
						
						the examination was the question of the three thousand roubles; that
						
						is, was the sum spent here, at Mokroe, by Mitya on the first occasion,
						
						a month before, three thousand or fifteen hundred? And again had he
						
						spent three thousand or fifteen hundred yesterday? Alas, all the
						
						evidence given by everyone turned out to be against Mitya. There was
						
						not one in his favour, and some witnesses introduced new, almost
						
						crushing facts, in contradiction of his, Mitya's, story.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p2">The first witness examined was Trifon Borissovitch. He was not
						
						in the least abashed as he stood before the lawyers. He had, on the
						
						contrary, an air of stern and severe indignation with the accused,
						
						which gave him an appearance of truthfulness and personal dignity.
						
						He spoke little, and with reserve, waited to be questioned, answered
						
						precisely and deliberately. Firmly and unhesitatingly he bore
						
						witness that the sum spent a month before could not have been less
						
						than three thousand, that all the peasants about here would testify
						
						that they had heard the sum of three thousand mentioned by Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch himself. "What a lot of money he flung away on the
						
						Gypsy girls alone! He wasted a thousand, I daresay, on them alone."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p3">"I don't believe I gave them five hundred," was Mitya's gloomy
						
						comment on this. "It's a pity I didn't count the money at the time,
						
						but I was drunk..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p4">Mitya was sitting sideways with his back to the curtains. He
						
						listened gloomily, with a melancholy and exhausted air, as though he
						
						would say:
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p5">"Oh, say what you like. It makes no difference now."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p6">"More than a thousand went on them, Dmitri Fyodorovitch," retorted
						
						Trifon Borissovitch firmly. "You flung it about at random and they
						
						picked it up. They were a rascally, thievish lot, horse-stealers,
						
						they've been driven away from here, or maybe they'd bear witness
						
						themselves how much they got from you. I saw the sum in your hands,
						
						myself- count it I didn't, you didn't let me, that's true enough-
						
						but by the look of it I should say it was far more than fifteen
						
						hundred... fifteen hundred, indeed! We've seen money too. We can judge
						
						of amounts..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p7">As for the sum spent yesterday he asserted that Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch had told him, as soon as he arrived, that he had
						
						brought three thousand with him.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p8">"Come now, is that so, Trifon Borissovitch?" replied Mitya.
						
						"Surely I didn't declare so positively that I'd brought three
						
						thousand?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p9">"You did say so, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. You said it before Andrey.
						
						Andrey himself is still here. Send for him. And in the hall, when
						
						you were treating the chorus, you shouted straight out that you
						
						would leave your sixth thousand here- that is, with what you spent
						
						before, we must understand. Stepan and Semyon heard it, and Pyotr
						
						Fomitch Kalganov, too, was standing beside you at the time. Maybe he'd
						
						remember it..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p10">The evidence as to the "sixth" thousand made an extraordinary
						
						impression on the two lawyers. They were delighted with this new
						
						mode of reckoning; three and three made six, three thousand then and
						
						three now made six, that was clear.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p11">They questioned all the peasants suggested by Trifon Borissovitch,
						
						Stepan and Semyon, the driver Andrey, and Kalganov. The peasants and
						
						the driver unhesitatingly confirmed Trifon Borissovitch's evidence.
						
						They noted down, with particular care, Andrey's account of the
						
						conversation he had had with Mitya on the road: "'Where,' says he, 'am
						
						I, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, going, to heaven or to hell, and shall I be
						
						forgiven in the next world or not?'" The psychological Ippolit
						
						Kirillovitch heard this with a subtle smile, and ended by recommending
						
						that these remarks as to where Dmitri Fyodorovitch would go should
						
						be "included in the case."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p12">Kalganov, when called, came in reluctantly, frowning and
						
						ill-humoured, and he spoke to the lawyers as though he had never met
						
						them before in his life, though they were acquaintances whom he had
						
						been meeting every day for a long time past. He began by saying that
						
						"he knew nothing about it and didn't want to." But it appeared that he
						
						had heard of the" sixth" thousand, and he admitted that he had been
						
						standing close by at the moment. As far as he could see he "didn't
						
						know" how much money Mitya had in his hands. He affirmed that the
						
						Poles had cheated at cards. In reply to reiterated questions he stated
						
						that, after the Poles had been turned out, Mitya's position with
						
						Agrafena Alexandrovna had certainly improved, and that she had said
						
						that she loved him. He spoke of Agrafena Alexandrovna with reserve and
						
						respect, as though she had been a lady of the best society, and did
						
						not once allow himself to call her Grushenka. In spite of the young
						
						man's obvious repugnance at giving evidence, Ippolit Kirillovitch
						
						examined him at great length, and only from him learnt all the details
						
						of what made up Mitya's "romance," so to say, on that night. Mitya did
						
						not once pull Kalganov up. At last they let the young man go, and he
						
						left the room with unconcealed indignation.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p13">The Poles, too, were examined. Though they had gone to bed in
						
						their room, they had not slept all night, and on the arrival of the
						
						police officers they hastily dressed and got ready, realising that
						
						they would certainly be sent for. They gave their evidence with
						
						dignity, though not without some uneasiness. The little Pole turned
						
						out to be a retired official of the twelfth class, who had served in
						
						Siberia as a veterinary surgeon. His name was Mussyalovitch. Pan
						
						Vrubelvsky turned out to be an uncertificated dentist. Although
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch asked them questions on entering the room they
						
						both addressed their answers to Mihail Makarovitch, who was standing
						
						on one side, taking him in their ignorance for the most important
						
						person and in command, and addressed him at every word as "Pan
						
						Colonel." Only after several reproofs from Mihail Makarovitch himself,
						
						they grasped that they had to address their answers to Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch only. It turned out that they could speak Russian quite
						
						correctly except for their accent in some words. Of his relations with
						
						Grushenka, past and present, Pan Mussyalovitch spoke proudly and
						
						warmly, so that Mitya was roused at once and declared that he would
						
						not allow the "scoundrel" to speak like that in his presence! Pan
						
						Mussyalovitch at once called attention to the word "scoundrel," and
						
						begged that it should be put down in the protocol. Mitya fumed with
						
						rage.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p14">"He's a scoundrel! A scoundrel! You can put that down. And put
						
						down, too, that, in spite of the protocol I still declare that he's
						
						a scoundrel!" he cried.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p15">Though Nikolay Parfenovitch did insert this in the protocol, he
						
						showed the most praiseworthy tact and management. After sternly
						
						reprimanding Mitya, he cut short all further inquiry into the romantic
						
						aspect of the case, and hastened to pass to what was essential. One
						
						piece of evidence given by the Poles roused special interest in the
						
						lawyers: that was how, in that very room, Mitya had tried to buy off
						
						Pan Mussyalovitch, and had offered him three thousand roubles to
						
						resign his claims, seven hundred roubles down, and the remaining two
						
						thousand three hundred "to be paid next day in the town." He had sworn
						
						at the time that he had not the whole sum with him at Mokroe, but that
						
						his money was in the town. Mitya observed hotly that he had not said
						
						that he would be sure to pay him the remainder next day in the town.
						
						But Pan Vrublevsky confirmed the statement, and Mitya, after
						
						thinking for a moment admitted, frowning, that it must have been as
						
						the Poles stated, that he had been excited at the time, and might
						
						indeed have said so.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p16">The prosecutor positively pounced on this piece of evidence. It
						
						seemed to establish for the prosecution (and they did, in fact, base
						
						this deduction on it) that half, or a part of, the three thousand that
						
						had come into Mitya's hands might really have been left somewhere
						
						hidden in the town, or even, perhaps, somewhere here, in Mokroe.
						
						This would explain the circumstance, so baffling for the
						
						prosecution, that only eight hundred roubles were to be found in
						
						Mitya's hands. This circumstance had been the one piece of evidence
						
						which, insignificant as it was, had hitherto told, to some extent,
						
						in Mitya's favour. Now this one piece of evidence in his favour had
						
						broken down. In answer to the prosecutor's inquiry, where he would
						
						have got the remaining two thousand three hundred roubles, since he
						
						himself had denied having more than fifteen hundred, Mitya confidently
						
						replied that he had meant to offer the "little chap," not money, but a
						
						formal deed of conveyance of his rights to the village of
						
						Tchermashnya, those rights which he had already offered to Samsonov
						
						and Madame Hohlakov. The prosecutor positively smiled at the
						
						"innocence of this subterfuge."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p17">"And you imagine he would have accepted such a deed as a
						
						substitute for two thousand three hundred roubles in cash?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p18">"He certainly would have accepted it," Mitya declared warmly.
						
						"Why, look here, he might have grabbed not two thousand, but four or
						
						six, for it. He would have put his lawyers, Poles and Jews, on to
						
						the job, and might have got, not three thousand, but the whole
						
						property out of the old man."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p19">The evidence of Pan Mussyalovitch was, of course, entered in the
						
						protocol in the fullest detail. Then they let the Poles go. The
						
						incident of the cheating at cards was hardly touched upon. Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch was too well pleased with them, as it was, and did not
						
						want to worry them with trifles, moreover, it was nothing but a
						
						foolish, drunken quarrel over cards. There had been drinking and
						
						disorder enough, that night.... So the two hundred roubles remained in
						
						the pockets of the Poles.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p20">Then old Maximov was summoned. He came in timidly, approached with
						
						little steps, looking very dishevelled and depressed. He had, all this
						
						time, taken refuge below with Grushenka, sitting dumbly beside her,
						
						and "now and then he'd begin blubbering over her and wiping his eyes
						
						with a blue check handkerchief," as Mihail Makarovitch described
						
						afterwards. So that she herself began trying to pacify and comfort
						
						him. The old man at once confessed that he had done wrong, that he had
						
						borrowed "ten roubles in my poverty," from Dmitri Fyodorovitch, and
						
						that he was ready to pay it back. To Nikolay Parfenovitch's direct
						
						question, had he noticed how much money Dmitri Fyodorovitch held in
						
						his hand, as he must have been able to see the sum better than
						
						anyone when he took the note from him, Maximov, in the most positive
						
						manner, declared that there was twenty thousand.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p21">"Have you ever seen so much as twenty thousand before, then?"
						
						inquired Nikolay Parfenovitch, with a smile.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p22">"To be sure I have, not twenty, but seven, when my wife
						
						mortgaged my little property. She'd only let me look at it from a
						
						distance, boasting of it to me. It was a very thick bundle, all
						
						rainbow-coloured notes. And Dmitri Fyodorovitch's were all
						
						rainbow-coloured..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p23">He was not kept long. At last it was Grushenka's turn. Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch was obviously apprehensive of the effect her appearance
						
						might have on Mitya, and he muttered a few words of admonition to him,
						
						but Mitya bowed his head in silence, giving him to understand "that he
						
						would not make a scene." Mihail Makarovitch himself led Grushenka
						
						in. She entered with a stern and gloomy face, that looked almost
						
						composed, and sat down quietly on the chair offered her by Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch. She was very pale, she seemed to be cold, and wrapped
						
						herself closely in her magnificent black shawl. She was suffering from
						
						a slight feverish chill- the first symptom of the long illness which
						
						followed that night. Her grave air, her direct earnest look and
						
						quiet manner made a very favourable impression on everyone. Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch was even a little bit "fascinated." He admitted
						
						himself, when talking about it afterwards, that only then had he
						
						seen "how handsome the woman was," for, though he had seen her several
						
						times he had always looked upon her as something of a "provincial
						
						hetaira." "She has the manners of the best society," he said
						
						enthusiastically, gossiping about her in a circle of ladies. But
						
						this was received with positive indignation by the ladies, who
						
						immediately called him a "naughty man," to his great satisfaction.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p24">As she entered the room, Grushenka only glanced for an instant
						
						at Mitya, who looked at her uneasily. But her face reassured him at
						
						once. After the first inevitable inquiries and warnings, Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch asked her, hesitating a little, but preserving the most
						
						courteous manner, on what terms she was with the retired lieutenant,
						
						Dmitri Fyodorovitch Karamazov. To this Grushenka firmly and quietly
						
						replied:
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p25">"He was an acquaintance. He came to see me as an acquaintance
						
						during the last month." To further inquisitive questions she
						
						answered plainly and with complete frankness, that, though "at
						
						times" she had thought him attractive, she had not loved him, but
						
						had won his heart as well as his old father's "in my nasty spite,"
						
						that she had seen that Mitya was very jealous of Fyodor Pavlovitch and
						
						everyone else; but that had only amused her. She had never meant to go
						
						to Fyodor Pavlovitch, she had simply been laughing at him. "I had no
						
						thoughts for either of them all this last month. I was expecting
						
						another man who had wronged me. But I think," she said in
						
						conclusion, "that there's no need for you to inquire about that, nor
						
						for me to answer you, for that's my own affair."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p26">Nikolay Parfenovitch immediately acted upon this hint. He again
						
						dismissed the "romantic" aspect of the case and passed to the
						
						serious one, that is, to the question of most importance, concerning
						
						the three thousand roubles. Grushenka confirmed the statement that
						
						three thousand roubles had certainly been spent on the first
						
						carousal at Mokroe, and, though she had not counted the money herself,
						
						she had heard that it was three thousand from Dmitri Fyodorovitch's
						
						own lips.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p27">"Did he tell you that alone, or before someone else, or did you
						
						only hear him speak of it to others in your presence?" the
						
						prosecutor inquired immediately.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p28">To which Grushenka replied that she had heard him say so before
						
						other people, and had heard him say so when they were alone.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p29">"Did he say it to you alone once, or several times?" inquired
						
						the prosecutor, and learned that he had told Grushenka so several
						
						times.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p30">Ippolit Kirillovitch was very well satisfied with this piece of
						
						evidence. Further examination elicited that Grushenka knew, too, where
						
						that money had come from, and that Dmitri Fyodorovitch had got it from
						
						Katerina Ivanovna.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p31">"And did you never, once, hear that the money spent a month ago
						
						was not three thousand, but less, and that Dmitri Fyodorovitch had
						
						saved half that sum for his own use?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p32">"No, I never heard that," answered Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p33">It was explained further that Mitya had, on the contrary, often
						
						told her that he hadn't a farthing.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p34">"He was always expecting to get some from his father," said
						
						Grushenka in conclusion.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p35">"Did he never say before you... casually, or in a moment of
						
						irritation," Nikolay Parfenovitch put in suddenly, "that he intended
						
						to make an attempt on his father's life?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p36">"Ach, he did say so," sighed Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p37">"Once or several times?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p38">"He mentioned it several times, always in anger."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p39">"And did you believe he would do it?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p40">"No, I never believed it," she answered firmly. "I had faith in
						
						his noble heart."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p41">"Gentlemen, allow me," cried Mitya suddenly, "allow me to say
						
						one word to Agrafena Alexandrovna, in your presence."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p42">"You can speak," Nikolay Parfenovitch assented.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p43">"Agrafena Alexandrovna!" Mitya got up from his chair, "have
						
						faith in God and in me. I am not guilty of my father's murder!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p44">Having uttered these words Mitya sat down again on his chair.
						
						Grushenka stood up and crossed herself devoutly before the ikon.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p45">"Thanks be to Thee, O Lord," she said, in a voice thrilled with
						
						emotion, and still standing, she turned to Nikolay Parfenovitch and
						
						added:
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p46">"As he has spoken now, believe it! I know him. He'll say
						
						anything as a joke or from obstinacy, but he'll never deceive you
						
						against his conscience. He's telling the whole truth, you may
						
						believe it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p47">"Thanks, Agrafena Alexandrovna, you've given me fresh courage,"
						
						Mitya responded in a quivering voice.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p48">As to the money spent the previous day, she declared that she
						
						did not know what sum it was, but had heard him tell several people
						
						that he had three thousand with him. And to the question where he
						
						got the money, she said that he had told her that he had "stolen" it
						
						from Katerina Ivanovna, and that she had replied to that that he
						
						hadn't stolen it, and that he must pay the money back next day. On the
						
						prosecutor's asking her emphatically whether the money he said he
						
						had stolen from Katerina Ivanovna was what he had spent yesterday,
						
						or what he had squandered here a month ago, she declared that he meant
						
						the money spent a month ago, and that that was how she understood him.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p49">Grushenka was at last released, and Nikolay Parfenovitch
						
						informed her impulsively that she might at once return to the town and
						
						that if he could be of any assistance to her, with horses for example,
						
						or if she would care for an escort, he... would be-
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p50">"I thank you sincerely," said Grushenka, bowing to him, "I'm going
						
						with this old gentleman; I am driving him back to town with me, and
						
						meanwhile, if you'll allow me, I'll wait below to hear what you decide
						
						about Dmitri Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p51">She went out. Mitya was calm, and even looked more cheerful, but
						
						only for a moment. He felt more and more oppressed by a strange
						
						physical weakness. His eyes were closing with fatigue. The examination
						
						of the witnesses was, at last, over. They procceded to a revision of
						
						the protocol. Mitya got up, moved from his chair to the corner by
						
						the curtain, lay down on a large chest covered with a rug, and
						
						instantly fell asleep.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p52">He had a strange dream, utterly out of keeping with the place
						
						and the time.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p53">He was driving somewhere in the steppes, where he had been
						
						stationed long ago, and a peasant was driving him in a cart with a
						
						pair of horses, through snow and sleet. He was cold, it was early in
						
						November, and the snow was falling in big wet flakes, melting as
						
						soon as it touched the earth. And the peasant drove him smartly, he
						
						had a fair, long beard. He was not an old man, somewhere about
						
						fifty, and he had on a grey peasant's smock. Not far off was a
						
						village, he could see the black huts, and half the huts were burnt
						
						down, there were only the charred beams sticking up. And as they drove
						
						in, there were peasant women drawn up along the road, a lot of
						
						women, a whole row, all thin and wan, with their faces a sort of
						
						brownish colour, especially one at the edge, a tall, bony woman, who
						
						looked forty, but might have been only twenty, with a long thin
						
						face. And in her arms was a little baby crying. And her breasts seemed
						
						so dried up that there was not a drop of milk in them. And the child
						
						cried and cried, and held out its little bare arms, with its little
						
						fists blue from cold.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p54">"Why are they crying? Why are they crying?" Mitya asked, as they
						
						dashed gaily by.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p55">"It's the babe," answered the driver, "the babe weeping."
						
						</p><p id="viii_3-p56">And Mitya was struck by his saying, in his peasant way, "the
						
						babe," and he liked the peasant's calling it a "babe." There seemed
						
						more pity in it.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p57">"But why is it weeping?" Mitya persisted stupidly, "why are its
						
						little arms bare? Why don't they wrap it up?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p58">"The babe's cold, its little clothes are frozen and don't warm
						
						it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p59">"But why is it? Why?" foolish Mitya still persisted.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p60">"Why, they're poor people, burnt out. They've no bread. They're
						
						begging because they've been burnt out."
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p61">"No, no," Mitya, as it were, still did not understand. "Tell me
						
						why it is those poor mothers stand there? Why are people poor? Why
						
						is the babe poor? Why is the steppe barren? Why don't they hug each
						
						other and kiss? Why don't they sing songs of joy? Why are they so dark
						
						from black misery? Why don't they feed the babe?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p62">And he felt that, though his questions were unreasonable and
						
						senseless, yet he wanted to ask just that, and he had to ask it just
						
						in that way. And he felt that a passion of pity, such as he had
						
						never known before, was rising in his heart, that he wanted to cry,
						
						that he wanted to do something for them all, so that the babe should
						
						weep no more, so that the dark-faced, dried-up mother should not weep,
						
						that no one should shed tears again from that moment, and he wanted to
						
						do it at once, at once, regardless of all obstacles, with all the
						
						recklessness of the Karamazovs.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p63">"And I'm coming with you. I won't leave you now for the rest of my
						
						life, I'm coming with you", he heard close beside him Grushenka's
						
						tender voice, thrilling with emotion. And his heart glowed, and he
						
						struggled forward towards the light, and he longed to live, to live,
						
						to go on and on, towards the new, beckoning light, and to hasten,
						
						hasten, now, at once! "What! Where?" he exclaimed opening his eyes,
						
						and sitting up on the chest, as though he had revived from a swoon,
						
						smiling brightly. Nikolay Parfenovitch was standing over him,
						
						suggesting that he should hear the protocol read aloud and sign it.
						
						Mitya guessed that he had been asleep an hour or more, but he did
						
						not hear Nikolay Parfenovitch. He was suddenly struck by the fact that
						
						there was a pillow under his head, which hadn't been there when he had
						
						leant back, exhausted, on the chest.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p64">"Who put that pillow under my head? Who was so kind?" he cried,
						
						with a sort of ecstatic gratitude, and tears in his voice, as though
						
						some great kindness had been shown him.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p65">He never found out who this kind man was; perhaps one of the
						
						peasant witnesses, or Nikolay Parfenovitch's little secretary, had
						
						compassionately thought to put a pillow under his head; but his
						
						whole soul was quivering with tears. He went to the table and said
						
						that he would sign whatever they liked.
						
							</p><p id="viii_3-p66">"I've had a good dream, gentlemen," he said in a strange voice,
						
						with a new light, as of joy, in his face.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 9 - They Carry Mitya Away " prev="viii_3" next="iv_8" id="ix_1">
					
					
							<p id="ix_1-p1">WHEN the protocol had been signed, Nikolay Parfenovitch turned
						
						solemnly to the prisoner and read him the "Committal," setting
						
						forth, that in such a year, on such a day, in such a place, the
						
						investigating lawyer of such-and-such a district court, having
						
						examined so-and-so (to wit, Mitya) accused of this and of that (all
						
						the charges were carefully written out) and having considered that the
						
						accused, not pleading guilty to the charges made against him, had
						
						brought forward nothing in his defence, while the witnesses,
						
						so-and-so, and so-and-so, and the circumstances such-and-such
						
						testify against him, acting in accordance with such-and-such
						
						articles of the Statute Book, and so on, has ruled, that, in order
						
						to preclude so-and-so (Mitya) from all means of evading pursuit and
						
						judgment, he be detained in such-and-such a prison, which he hereby
						
						notifies to the accused and communicates a copy of this same
						
						"Committal" to the deputy prosecutor, and so on, and so on.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p2">In brief, Mitya was informed that he was, from that moment, a
						
						prisoner, and that he would be driven at once to the town, and there
						
						shut up in a very unpleasant place. Mitya listened attentively, and
						
						only shrugged his shoulders.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p3">"Well, gentlemen, I don't blame you. I'm ready.... I understand
						
						that there's nothing else for you to do."
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p4">Nikolay Parfenovitch informed him gently that he would be escorted
						
						at once by the rural police officer, Mavriky Mavrikyevitch, who
						
						happened to be on the spot....
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p5">"Stay," Mitya interrupted, suddenly, and impelled by
						
						uncontrollable feeling he pronounced, addressing all in the room:
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p6">"Gentlemen, we're all cruel, we're all monsters, we all make men
						
						weep, and mothers, and babes at the breast, but of all, let it be
						
						settled here, now, of all I am the lowest reptile! I've sworn to
						
						amend, and every day I've done the same filthy things. I understand
						
						now that such men as I need a blow, a blow of destiny to catch them as
						
						with a noose, and bind them by a force from without. Never, never
						
						should I have risen of myself! But the thunderbolt has fallen. I
						
						accept the torture of accusation, and my public shame; I want to
						
						suffer and by suffering I shall be purified. Perhaps I shall be
						
						purified, gentlemen? But listen, for the last time, I am not guilty of
						
						my father's blood. I accept my punishment, not because I killed him,
						
						but because I meant to kill him, and perhaps I really might have
						
						killed him. Still I mean to fight it out with you. I warn you of that.
						
						I'll fight it out with you to the end, and then God will decide.
						
						Good-bye, gentlemen, don't be vexed with me for having shouted at
						
						you during the examination. Oh, I was still such a fool then.... In
						
						another minute I shall be a prisoner, but now, for the last time, as a
						
						free man, Dmitri Karamazov offers you his hand. Saying good-bye to
						
						you, I say it to all men."
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p7">His voice quivered and he stretched out his hand, but Nikolay
						
						Parfenovitch, who happened to stand nearest to him, with a sudden,
						
						almost nervous movement, hid his hands behind his back. Mitya
						
						instantly noticed this, and started. He let his outstretched hand fall
						
						at once.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p8">"The preliminary inquiry is not yet over," Nikolay Parfenovitch
						
						faltered, somewhat embarrassed. "We will continue it in the town,
						
						and I, for my part, of course, am ready to wish you all success...
						
						in your defence.... As a matter of fact, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, I've
						
						always been disposed to regard you as, so to speak, more unfortunate
						
						than guilty. All of us here, if I may make bold to speak for all, we
						
						are all ready to recognise that you are, at bottom, a young man of
						
						honour, but, alas, one who has been carried away by certain passions
						
						to a somewhat excessive degree..."
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p9">Nikolay Parfenovitch's little figure was positively majestic by
						
						the time he had finished speaking. It struck Mitya that in another
						
						minute this "boy" would take his arm, lead him to another corner,
						
						and renew their conversation about "girls." But many quite
						
						irrelevant and inappropriate thoughts sometimes occur even to a
						
						prisoner when he is being led out to execution.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p10">"Gentlemen, you are good, you are humane, may I see her to say
						
						'good-bye' for the last time?" asked Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p11">"Certainly, but considering... in fact, now it's impossible except
						
						in the presence of-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p12">"Oh, well, if it must be so, it must!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p13">Grushenka was brought in, but the farewell was brief, and of few
						
						words, and did not at all satisfy Nikolay Parfenovitch. Grushenka made
						
						a deep bow to Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p14">"I have told you I am yours, and I will be yours. I will follow
						
						you for ever, wherever they may send you. Farewell; you are guiltless,
						
						though you've been your own undoing."
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p15">Her lips quivered, tears flowed from her eyes.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p16">"Forgive me, Grusha, for my love, for ruining you, too, with my
						
						love."
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p17">Mitya would have said something more, but he broke off and went
						
						out. He was at once surrounded by men who kept a constant watch on
						
						him. At the bottom of the steps to which he had driven up with such
						
						a dash the day before with Andrey's three horses, two carts stood in
						
						readiness. Mavriky Mavrikyevitch, a sturdy, thick-set man with a
						
						wrinkled face, was annoyed about something, some sudden
						
						irregularity. He was shouting angrily. He asked Mitya to get into
						
						the cart with somewhat excessive surliness.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p18">"When I stood him drinks in the tavern, the man had quite a
						
						different face," thought Mitya, as he got in. At the gates there was a
						
						crowd of people, peasants, women, and drivers. Trifon Borissovitch
						
						came down the steps too. All stared at Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p19">"Forgive me at parting, good people!" Mitya shouted suddenly
						
						from the cart.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p20">"Forgive us too!" he heard two or three voices.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p21">"Good-bye to you, too, Trifon Borissovitch!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p22">But Trifon Borissovitch did not even turn round. He was,
						
						perhaps, too busy. He, too, was shouting and fussing about
						
						something. It appeared that everything was not yet ready in the second
						
						cart, in which two constables were to accompany Mavriky Mavrikyevitch.
						
						The peasant who had been ordered to drive the second cart was
						
						pulling on his smock, stoutly maintaining that it was not his turn
						
						to go, but Akim's. But Akim was not to be seen. They ran to look for
						
						him. The peasant persisted and besought them to wait.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p23">"You see what our peasants are, Mavriky Mavrikyevitch. They've
						
						no shame!" exclaimed Trifon Borissovitch. "Akim gave you twenty-five
						
						copecks the day before yesterday. You've drunk it all and now you
						
						cry out. I'm simply surprised at your good-nature, with our low
						
						peasants, Mavriky Mavrikyevitch, that's all I can say."
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p24">"But what do we want a second cart for?" Mitya put in. "Let's
						
						start with the one, Mavriky Mavrikyevitch. I won't be unruly, I
						
						won't run away from you, old fellow. What do we want an escort for?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p25">"I'll trouble you, sir, to learn how to speak to me if you've
						
						never been taught. I'm not 'old fellow' to you, and you can keep
						
						your advice for another time!" Mavriky Mavrikyevitch snapped out
						
						savagely, as though glad to vent his wrath.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p26">Mitya was reduced to silence. He flushed all over. A moment
						
						later he felt suddenly very cold. The rain had ceased, but the dull
						
						sky was still overcast with clouds, and a keen wind was blowing
						
						straight in his face.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p27">"I've taken a chill," thought Mitya, twitching his shoulders.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p28">At last Mavriky Mavrikyevitch, too, got into the cart, sat down
						
						heavily, and, as though without noticing it, squeezed Mitya into the
						
						corner. It is true that he was out of humour and greatly disliked
						
						the task that had been laid upon him.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p29">"Good-bye, Trifon Borissovitch!" Mitya shouted again, and felt
						
						himself, that he had not called out this time from good-nature, but
						
						involuntarily, from resentment.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p30">But Trifon Borissovitch stood proudly, with both hands behind
						
						his back, and staring straight at Mitya with a stern and angry face,
						
						he made no reply.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p31">"Good-bye, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, good-bye!" he heard all at once
						
						the voice of Kalganov, who had suddenly darted out. Running up to
						
						the cart he held out his hand to Mitya. He had no cap on.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p32">Mitya had time to seize and press his hand.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p33">"Good-bye, dear fellow! I shan't forget your generosity," he cried
						
						warmly.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p34">But the cart moved and their hands parted. The bell began
						
						ringing and Mitya was driven off.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p35">Kalganov ran back, sat down in a corner, bent his head, hid his
						
						face in his hands, and burst out crying. For a long while he sat
						
						like that, crying as though he were a little boy instead of a young
						
						man of twenty. Oh, he believed almost without doubt in Mitya's guilt.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p36">"What are these people? What can men be after this?" he
						
						exclaimed incoherently, in bitter despondency, almost despair. At that
						
						moment he had no desire to live.
						
							</p><p id="ix_1-p37">"Is it worth it? Is it worth it?" exclaimed the boy in his grief.</p>					
					
					</div4> 						
				</div3>
			</div2>

<div2 title="PART IV" prev="ix_1" next="i_14" id="iv_8">

<div3 title="Book X - The Boys" prev="iv_8" next="i_15" id="i_14">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - Kolya Krassotkin" prev="i_14" next="ii_13" id="i_15">
					
							<p id="i_15-p1">IT was the beginning of November. There had been a hard frost,
						
						eleven degrees Reaumur, without snow, but a little dry snow had fallen
						
						on the frozen ground during the night, and a keen dry wind was lifting
						
						and blowing it along the dreary streets of our town, especially
						
						about the market-place. It was a dull morning, but the snow had
						
						ceased.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p2">Not far from the market-place, close to Plotnikov's shop, there
						
						stood a small house, very clean both without and within. It belonged
						
						to Madame Krassotkin, the widow of a former provincial secretary,
						
						who had been dead for fourteen years. His widow, still a
						
						nice-looking woman of thirty-two, was living in her neat little
						
						house on her private means. She lived in respectable seclusion; she
						
						was of a soft but fairly cheerful disposition. She was about
						
						eighteen at the time of her husband's death; she had been married only
						
						a year and had just borne him a son. From the day of his death she had
						
						devoted herself heart and soul to the bringing up of her precious
						
						treasure, her boy Kolya. Though she had loved him passionately those
						
						fourteen years, he had caused her far more suffering than happiness.
						
						She had been trembling and fainting with terror almost every day,
						
						afraid he would fall ill, would catch cold, do something naughty,
						
						climb on a chair and fall off it, and so on and so on. When Kolya
						
						began going to school, the mother devoted herself to studying all
						
						the sciences with him so as to help him, and go through his lessons
						
						with him. She hastened to make the acquaintance of the teachers and
						
						their wives, even made up to Kolya's schoolfellows, and fawned upon
						
						them in the hope of thus saving Kolya from being teased, laughed at,
						
						or beaten by them. She went so far that the boys actually began to
						
						mock at him on her account and taunt him with being a "mother's
						
						darling."
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p3">But the boy could take his own part. He was a resolute boy,
						
						"tremendously strong," as was rumoured in his class, and soon proved
						
						to be the fact; he was agile, strong-willed, and of an audacious and
						
						enterprising temper. He was good at lessons, and there was a rumour in
						
						the school that he could beat the teacher, Dardanelov, at arithmetic
						
						and universal history. Though he looked down upon everyone, he was a
						
						good comrade and not supercilious. He accepted his schoolfellows'
						
						respect as his due, but was friendly with them. Above all, he knew
						
						where to draw the line. He could restrain himself on occasion, and
						
						in his relations with the teachers he never overstepped that last
						
						mystic limit beyond which a prank becomes an unpardonable breach of
						
						discipline. But he was as fond of mischief on every possible
						
						occasion as the smallest boy in the school, and not so much for the
						
						sake of mischief as for creating a sensation, inventing something,
						
						something effective and conspicuous. He was extremely vain. He knew
						
						how to make even his mother give way to him; he was almost despotic in
						
						his control of her. She gave way to him, oh, she had given way to
						
						him for years. The one thought unendurable to her was that her boy had
						
						no great love for her. She was always fancying that Kolya was
						
						"unfeeling" to her, and at times, dissolving into hysterical tears,
						
						she used to reproach him with his coldness. The boy disliked this, and
						
						the more demonstrations of feeling were demanded of him, the more he
						
						seemed intentionally to avoid them. Yet it was not intentional on
						
						his part but instinctive- it was his character. His mother was
						
						mistaken; he was very fond of her. He only disliked "sheepish
						
						sentimentality," as he expressed it in his schoolboy language.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p4">There was a bookcase in the house containing a few books that
						
						had been his father's. Kolya was fond of reading, and had read several
						
						of them by himself. His mother did not mind that and only wondered
						
						sometimes at seeing the boy stand for hours by the bookcase poring
						
						over a book instead of going to play. And in that way Kolya read
						
						some things unsuitable for his age.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p5">Though the boy, as a rule, knew where to draw the line in his
						
						mischief, he had of late begun to play pranks that caused his mother
						
						serious alarm. It is true there was nothing vicious in what he did,
						
						but a wild mad recklessness.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p6">It happened that July, during the summer holidays, that the mother
						
						and son went to another district, forty-five miles away, to spend a
						
						week with a distant relation, whose husband was an official at the
						
						railway station (the very station, the nearest one to our town, from
						
						which a month later Ivan Fyodorovitch Karamazov set off for Moscow).
						
						There Kolya began by carefully investigating every detail connected
						
						with the railways, knowing that he could impress his schoolfellows
						
						when he got home with his newly acquired knowledge. But there happened
						
						to be some other boys in the place with whom he soon made friends.
						
						Some of them were living at the station, others in the
						
						neighbourhood; there were six or seven of them, all between twelve and
						
						fifteen, and two of them came from our town. The boys played together,
						
						and on the fourth or fifth day of Kolya's stay at the station, a mad
						
						bet was made by the foolish boys. Kolya, who was almost the youngest
						
						of the party and rather looked down upon by the others in consequence,
						
						was moved by vanity or by reckless bravado to bet them two roubles
						
						that he would lie down between the rails at night when the eleven
						
						o'clock train was due, and would lie there without moving while the
						
						train rolled over him at full speed. It is true they made a
						
						preliminary investigation, from which it appeared that it was possible
						
						to lie so flat between the rails that the train could pass over
						
						without touching, but to lie there was no joke! Kolya maintained
						
						stoutly that he would. At first they laughed at him, called him a
						
						little liar, a braggart, but that only egged him on. What piqued him
						
						most was that these boys of fifteen turned up their noses at him too
						
						superciliously, and were at first disposed to treat him as "a small
						
						boy," not fit to associate with them, and that was an unendurable
						
						insult. And so it was resolved to go in the evening, half a mile
						
						from the station, so that the train might have time to get up full
						
						speed after leaving the station The boys assembled. It was a
						
						pitch-dark night without a moon. At the time fixed, Kolya lay down
						
						between the rails. The five others who had taken the bet waited
						
						among the bushes below the embankment, their hearts beating with
						
						suspense, which was followed by alarm and remorse. At last they
						
						heard in the distance the rumble of the train leaving the station. Two
						
						red lights gleamed out of the darkness; the monster roared as it
						
						approached.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p7">"Run, run away from the rails," the boys cried to Kolya from the
						
						bushes, breathless with terror. But it was too late: the train
						
						darted up and flew past. The boys rushed to Kolya. He lay without
						
						moving. They began pulling at him, lifting him up. He suddenly got
						
						up and walked away without a word. Then he explained that he had
						
						lain there as though he were insensible to frighten them, but the fact
						
						was that he really had lost consciousness, as he confessed long
						
						after to his mother. In this way his reputation as "a desperate
						
						character," was established for ever. He returned home to the
						
						station as white as a sheet. Next day he had a slight attack of
						
						nervous fever, but he was in high spirits and well pleased with
						
						himself. The incident did not become known at once, but when they came
						
						back to the town it penetrated to the school and even reached the ears
						
						of the masters. But then Kolya's mother hastened to entreat the
						
						masters on her boy's behalf, and in the end Dardanelov, a respected
						
						and influential teacher, exerted himself in his favour, and the affair
						
						was ignored.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p8">Dardanelov was a middle-aged bachelor, who had been passionately
						
						in love with Madame Krassotkin for many years past, and had once
						
						already, about a year previously, ventured, trembling with fear and
						
						the delicacy of his sentiments, to offer her most respectfully his
						
						hand in marriage. But she refused him resolutely, feeling that to
						
						accept him would be an act of treachery to her son, though
						
						Dardanelov had, to judge from certain mysterious symptoms, reason
						
						for believing that he was not an object of aversion to the charming
						
						but too chaste and tender-hearted widow. Kolya's mad prank seemed to
						
						have broken the ice, and Dardanelov was rewarded for his
						
						intercession by a suggestion of hope. The suggestion, it is true,
						
						was a faint one, but then Dardanelov was such a paragon of purity
						
						and delicacy that it was enough for the time being to make him
						
						perfectly happy. He was fond of the boy, though he would have felt
						
						it beneath him to try and win him over, and was severe and strict with
						
						him in class. Kolya, too, kept him at a respectful distance. He
						
						learned his lessons perfectly; he was second in his class, was
						
						reserved with Dardanelov, and the whole class firmly believed that
						
						Kolya was so good at universal history that he could "beat" even
						
						Dardanelov. Kolya did indeed ask him the question, "Who founded Troy?"
						
						to which Dardanelov had made a very vague reply, referring to the
						
						movements and migrations of races, to the remoteness of the period, to
						
						the mythical legends. But the question, "Who had founded Troy?" that
						
						is, what individuals, he could not answer, and even for some reason
						
						regarded the question as idle and frivolous. But the boys remained
						
						convinced that Dardanelov did not know who founded Troy. Kolya had
						
						read of the founders of Troy in Smaragdov, whose history was among the
						
						books in his father's bookcase. In the end all the boys became
						
						interested in the question, who it was that had founded Troy, but
						
						Krassotkin would not tell his secret, and his reputation for knowledge
						
						remained unshaken.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p9">After the incident on the railway a certain change came over
						
						Kolya's attitude to his mother. When Anna Fyodorovna (Madame
						
						Krassotkin) heard of her son's exploit, she almost went out of her
						
						mind with horror. She had such terrible attacks of hysterics,
						
						lasting with intervals for several days, that Kolya, seriously alarmed
						
						at last, promised on his honour that such pranks should never be
						
						repeated. He swore on his knees before the holy image, and swore by
						
						the memory of his father, at Madame Krassotkin's instance, and the
						
						"manly" Kolya burst into tears like a boy of six. And all that day the
						
						mother and son were constantly rushing into each other's arms sobbing.
						
						Next day Kolya woke up as "unfeeling" as before, but he had become
						
						more silent, more modest, sterner, and more thoughtful.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p10">Six weeks later, it is true, he got into another scrape, which
						
						even brought his name to the ears of our Justice of the Peace, but
						
						it was a scrape of quite another kind, amusing, foolish, and he did
						
						not, as it turned out, take the leading part in it, but was only
						
						implicated in it. But of this later. His mother still fretted and
						
						trembled, but the more uneasy she became, the greater were the hopes
						
						of Dardanelov. It must be noted that Kolya understood and divined what
						
						was in Dardanelov's heart and, of course, despised him profoundly
						
						for his "feelings"; he had in the past been so tactless as to show
						
						this contempt before his mother, hinting vaguely that he knew what
						
						Dardanelov was after. But from the time of the railway incident his
						
						behaviour in this respect also was changed; he did not allow himself
						
						the remotest allusion to the subject and began to speak more
						
						respectfully of Dardanelov before his mother, which the sensitive
						
						woman at once appreciated with boundless gratitude. But at the
						
						slightest mention of Dardanelov by a visitor in Kolya's presence,
						
						she would flush as pink as a rose. At such moments Kolya would
						
						either stare out of the window scowling, or would investigate the
						
						state of his boots, or would shout angrily for "Perezvon," the big,
						
						shaggy, mangy dog, which he had picked up a month before, brought
						
						home, and kept for some reason secretly indoors, not showing him to
						
						any of his schoolfellows. He bullied him frightfully, teaching him all
						
						sorts of tricks, so that the poor dog howled for him whenever he was
						
						absent at school, and when he came in, whined with delight, rushed
						
						about as if he were crazy, begged, lay down on the ground pretending
						
						to be dead, and so on; in fact, showed all the tricks he had taught
						
						him, not at the word of command, but simply from the zeal of his
						
						excited and grateful heart.
						
							</p><p id="i_15-p11">I have forgotten, by the way, to mention that Kolya Krassotkin was
						
						the boy stabbed with a penknife by the boy already known to the reader
						
						as the son of Captain Snegiryov. Ilusha had been defending his
						
						father when the schoolboys jeered at him, shouting the nickname
						
						"wisp of tow."</p>					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - Children" prev="i_15" next="iii_13" id="ii_13">
					
							<p id="ii_13-p1">AND so on that frosty, snowy, and windy day in November, Kolya
						
						Krassotkin was sitting at home. It was Sunday and there was no school.
						
						It had just struck eleven, and he particularly wanted to go out "on
						
						very urgent business," but he was left alone in charge of the house,
						
						for it so happened that all its elder inmates were absent owing to a
						
						sudden and singular event. Madame Krassotkin had let two little rooms,
						
						separated from the rest of the house by a passage, to a doctor's
						
						wife with her two small children. This lady was the same age as Anna
						
						Fyodorovna, and a great friend of hers. Her husband, the doctor, had
						
						taken his departure twelve months before, going first to Orenburg
						
						and then to Tashkend, and for the last six months she had not heard
						
						a word from him. Had it not been for her friendship with Madame
						
						Krassotkin, which was some consolation to the forsaken lady, she would
						
						certainly have completely dissolved away in tears. And now, to add
						
						to her misfortunes, Katerina, her only servant, was suddenly moved the
						
						evening before to announce, to her mistress's amazement, that she
						
						proposed to bring a child into the world before morning. It seemed
						
						almost miraculous to everyone that no one had noticed the
						
						probability of it before. The astounded doctor's wife decided to
						
						move Katerina while there was still time to an establishment in the
						
						town kept by a midwife for such emergencies. As she set great store by
						
						her servant, she promptly carried out this plan and remained there
						
						looking after her. By the morning all Madame Krassotkin's friendly
						
						sympathy and energy were called upon to render assistance and appeal
						
						to someone for help in the case.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p2">So both the ladies were absent from home, the Krassotkins'
						
						servant, Agafya, had gone out to the market, and Kolya was thus left
						
						for a time to protect and look after "the kids," that is, the son
						
						and daughter of the doctor's wife, who were left alone. Kolya was
						
						not afraid of taking care of the house, besides he had Perezvon, who
						
						had been told to lie flat, without moving, under the bench in the
						
						hall. Every time Kolya, walking to and fro through the rooms, came
						
						into the hall, the dog shook his head and gave two loud and
						
						insinuating taps on the floor with his tail, but alas! the whistle did
						
						not sound to release him. Kolya looked sternly at the luckless dog,
						
						who relapsed again into obedient rigidity. The one thing that troubled
						
						Kolya was "the kids." He looked, of course, with the utmost scorn on
						
						Katerina's unexpected adventure, but he was very fond of the
						
						bereaved "kiddies," and had already taken them a picture-book. Nastya,
						
						the elder, a girl of eight, could read, and Kostya, the boy, aged
						
						seven, was very fond of being read to by her. Krassotkin could, of
						
						course, have provided more diverting entertainment for them. He
						
						could have made them stand side by side and played soldiers with them,
						
						or sent them hiding all over the house. He had done so more than
						
						once before and was not above doing it, so much so that a report
						
						once spread at school that Krassotkin played horses with the little
						
						lodgers at home, prancing with his head on one side like a
						
						trace-horse. But Krassotkin haughtily parried this thrust, pointing
						
						out that to play horses with boys of one's own age, boys of
						
						thirteen, would certainly be disgraceful "at this date," but that he
						
						did it for the sake of "the kids" because he liked them, and no one
						
						had a right to call him to account for his feelings. The two "kids"
						
						adored him.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p3">But on this occasion he was in no mood for games. He had very
						
						important business of his own before him, something almost mysterious.
						
						Meanwhile time was passing and Agafya, with whom he could have left
						
						the children, would not come back from market. He had several times
						
						already crossed the passage, opened the door of the lodgers' room
						
						and looked anxiously at "the kids" who were sitting over the book,
						
						as he had bidden them. Every time he opened the door they grinned at
						
						him, hoping he would come in and would do something delightful and
						
						amusing. But Kolya was bothered and did not go in.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p4">At last it struck eleven and he made up his mind, once for all,
						
						that if that "damned" Agafya did not come back within ten minutes he
						
						should go out without waiting for her, making "the kids" promise, of
						
						course, to be brave when he was away, not to be naughty, not to cry
						
						from fright. With this idea he put on his wadded winter overcoat
						
						with its catskin fur collar, slung his satchel round his shoulder,
						
						and, regardless of his mother's constantly reiterated entreaties
						
						that he would always put on goloshes in such cold weather, he looked
						
						at them contemptuously as he crossed the hall and went out with only
						
						his boots on. Perezvon, seeing him in his outdoor clothes, began
						
						tapping nervously, yet vigorously, on the floor with his tail.
						
						Twitching all over, he even uttered a plaintive whine. But Kolya,
						
						seeing his dog's passionate excitement, decided that it was a breach
						
						of discipline, kept him for another minute under the bench, and only
						
						when he had opened the door into the passage, whistled for him. The
						
						dog leapt up like a mad creature and rushed bounding before him
						
						rapturously.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p5">Kolya opened the door to peep at "the kids." They were both
						
						sitting as before at the table, not reading but warmly disputing about
						
						something. The children often argued together about various exciting
						
						problems of life, and Nastya, being the elder, always got the best
						
						of it. If Kostya did not agree with her, he almost always appealed
						
						to Kolya Krassotkin, and his verdict was regarded as infallible by
						
						both of them. This time the "kids"' discussion rather interested
						
						Krassotkin, and he stood still in the passage to listen. The
						
						children saw he was listening and that made them dispute with even
						
						greater energy.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p6">"I shall never, never believe," Nastya prattled, "that the old
						
						women find babies among the cabbages in the kitchen garden. It's
						
						winter now and there are no cabbages, and so the old woman couldn't
						
						have taken Katerina a daughter."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p7">Kolya whistled to himself.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p8">"Or perhaps they do bring babies from somewhere, but only to those
						
						who are married."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p9">Kostya stared at Nastya and listened, pondering profoundly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p10">"Nastya, how silly you are!" he said at last, firmly and calmly.
						
						"How can Katerina have a baby when she isn't married?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p11">Nastya was exasperated.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p12">"You know nothing about it," she snapped irritably. "Perhaps she
						
						has a husband, only he is in prison, so now she's got a baby."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p13">"But is her husband in prison?" the matter-of-fact Kostya inquired
						
						gravely.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p14">"Or, I tell you what," Nastya interrupted impulsively,
						
						completely rejecting and forgetting her first hypothesis. "She
						
						hasn't a husband, you are right there, but she wants to be married,
						
						and so she's been thinking of getting married, and thinking and
						
						thinking of it till now she's got it, that is, not a husband but a
						
						baby."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p15">"Well, perhaps so," Kostya agreed, entirely vanquished. "But you
						
						didn't say so before. So how could I tell?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p16">"Come, kiddies," said Kolya, stepping into the room. "You're
						
						terrible people, I see."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p17">"And Perezvon with you!" grinned Kostya, and began snapping his
						
						fingers and calling Perezvon.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p18">"I am in a difficulty, kids," Krassotkin began solemnly, "and
						
						you must help me. Agafya must have broken her leg, since she has not
						
						turned up till now, that's certain. I must go out. Will you let me
						
						go?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p19">The children looked anxiously at one another. Their smiling
						
						faces showed signs of uneasiness, but they did not yet fully grasp
						
						what was expected of them.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p20">"You won't be naughty while I am gone? You won't climb on the
						
						cupboard and break your legs? You won't be frightened alone and cry?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p21">A look of profound despondency came into the children's faces.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p22">"And I could show you something as a reward, a little copper
						
						cannon which can be fired with real gunpowder."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p23">The children's faces instantly brightened. "Show us the cannon,"
						
						said Kostya, beaming all over.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p24">Krassotkin put his hand in his satchel, and pulling out a little
						
						bronze cannon stood it on the table.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p25">"Ah, you are bound to ask that! Look, it's on wheels." He rolled
						
						the toy on along the table. "And it can be fired off, too. It can be
						
						loaded with shot and fired off."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p26">"And it could kill anyone?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p27">"It can kill anyone; you've only got to aim at anybody," and
						
						Krassotkin explained where the powder had to be put, where the shot
						
						should be rolled in, showing a tiny hole like a touch-hole, and told
						
						them that it kicked when it was fired.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p28">The children listened with intense interest. What particularly
						
						struck their imagination was that the cannon kicked.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p29">"And have you got any powder?" Nastya inquired.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p30">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p31">"Show us the powder, too," she drawled with a smile of entreaty.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p32">Krassotkin dived again into his satchel and pulled out a small
						
						flask containing a little real gunpowder. He had some shot, too, in
						
						a screw of paper. He even uncorked the flask and shook a little powder
						
						into the palm of his hand.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p33">"One has to be careful there's no fire about, or it would blow
						
						up and kill us all," Krassotkin warned them sensationally.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p34">The children gazed at the powder with an awe-stricken alarm that
						
						only intensified their enjoyment. But Kostya liked the shot better.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p35">"And does the shot burn?" he inquired.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p36">"No, it doesn't."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p37">"Give me a little shot," he asked in an imploring voice.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p38">"I'll give you a little shot; here, take it, but don't show it
						
						to your mother till I come back, or she'll be sure to think it's
						
						gunpowder, and will die of fright and give you a thrashing."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p39">"Mother never does whip us," Nastya observed at once.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p40">"I know, I only said it to finish the sentence. And don't you ever
						
						deceive your mother except just this once, until I come back. And
						
						so, kiddies, can I go out? You won't be frightened and cry when I'm
						
						gone?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p41">"We sha-all cry," drawled Kostya, on the verge of tears already.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p42">"We shall cry, we shall be sure to cry," Nastya chimed in with
						
						timid haste.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p43">"Oh, children, children, how fraught with peril are your years!
						
						There's no help for it, chickens; I shall have to stay with you I
						
						don't know how long. And time is passing, time is passing, oogh!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p44">"Tell Perezvon to pretend to be dead!" Kostya begged.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p45">"There's no help for it, we must have recourse to Perezvon. Ici,
						
						Perezvon." And Kolya began giving orders to the dog, who performed all
						
						his tricks.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p46">He was a rough-haired dog, of medium size, with a coat of a sort
						
						of lilac-grey colour. He was blind in his right eye, and his left
						
						ear was torn. He whined and jumped, stood and walked on his hind legs,
						
						lay on his back with his paws in the air, rigid as though he were
						
						dead. While this last performance was going on, the door opened and
						
						Agafya, Madame Krassotkin's servant, a stout woman of forty, marked
						
						with small-pox, appeared in the doorway. She had come back from market
						
						and had a bag full of provisions in her hand. Holding up the bag of
						
						provisions in her left hand she stood still to watch the dog. Though
						
						Kolya had been so anxious for her return, he did not cut short the
						
						performance, and after keeping Perezvon dead for the usual time, at
						
						last he whistled to him. The dog jumped up and began bounding about in
						
						his joy at having done his duty.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p47">"Only think, a dog!" Agafya observed sententiously.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p48">"Why are you late, female?" asked Krassotkin sternly.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p49">"Female, indeed! Go on with you, you brat."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p50">"Brat?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p51">"Yes, a brat. What is it to you if I'm late; if I'm late, you
						
						may be sure I have good reason," muttered Agafya, busying herself
						
						about the stove, without a trace of anger or displeasure in her voice.
						
						She seemed quite pleased, in fact, to enjoy a skirmish with her
						
						merry young master.
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p52">"Listen, you frivolous young woman," Krassotkin began, getting
						
						up from the sofa, "can you swear by all you hold sacred in the world
						
						and something else besides, that you will watch vigilantly over the
						
						kids in my absence? I am going out."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p53">"And what am I going to swear for?" laughed Agafya. "I shall
						
						look after them without that."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p54">"No, you must swear on your eternal salvation. Else I shan't go."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p55">"Well, don't then. What does it matter to me? It's cold out;
						
						stay at home."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p56">"Kids," Kolya turned to the children, "this woman will stay with
						
						you till I come back or till your mother comes, for she ought to
						
						have been back long ago. She will give you some lunch, too. You'll
						
						give them something, Agafya, won't you?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p57">"That I can do."
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p58">"Good-bye, chickens, I go with my heart at rest. And you, granny,"
						
						he added gravely, in an undertone, as he passed Agafya, "I hope you'll

						spare their tender years and not tell them any of your old woman's
						
						nonsense about Katerina. Ici, Perezvon!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_13-p59">"Get along with you!" retorted Agafya, really angry this time.
						
						"Ridiculous boy! You want a whipping for saying such things, that's
						
						what you want!"</p>				
				
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - The Schoolboy" prev="ii_13" next="iv_9" id="iii_13">
					
							<p id="iii_13-p1">BUT Kolya did not hear her. At last he could go out. As he went
						
						out at the gate he looked round him, shrugged up his shoulders, and
						
						saying "It is freezing," went straight along the street and turned off
						
						to the right towards the market-place. When he reached the last
						
						house but one before the market-place he stopped at the gate, pulled a
						
						whistle out of his pocket, and whistled with all his might as though
						
						giving a signal. He had not to wait more than a minute before a
						
						rosy-cheeked boy of about eleven, wearing a warm, neat and even
						
						stylish coat, darted out to meet him. This was Smurov, a boy in the
						
						preparatory class (two classes below Kolya Krassotkin), son of a
						
						well-to-do official. Apparently he was forbidden by his parents to
						
						associate with Krassotkin, who was well known to be a desperately
						
						naughty boy, so Smurov was obviously slipping out on the sly. He
						
						was- if the reader has not forgotten one of the group of boys who
						
						two months before had thrown stones at Ilusha. He was the one who told
						
						Alyosha about Ilusha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p2">"I've been waiting for you for the last hour, Krassotkin," said
						
						Smurov stolidly, and the boys strode towards the market-place.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p3">"I am late," answered Krassotkin. "I was detained by
						
						circumstances. You won't be thrashed for coming with me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p4">"Come, I say, I'm never thrashed! And you've got Perezvon with
						
						you?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p5">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p6">"You're taking him, too?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p7">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p8">"Ah! if it were only Zhutchka!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p9">"That's impossible. Zhutchka's non-existent. Zhutchka is lost in
						
						the mists of obscurity."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p10">"Ah! couldn't we do this?" Smurov suddenly stood still. "You see
						
						Ilusha says that Zhutchka was a shaggy, greyish, smoky-looking dog
						
						like Perezvon. Couldn't you tell him this is Zhutchka, and he might
						
						believe you?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p11">"Boy, shun a lie, that's one thing; even with a good object-
						
						that's another. Above all, I hope you've not told them anything
						
						about my coming."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p12">"Heaven forbid! I know what I am about. But you won't comfort
						
						him with Perezvon," said Smurov, with a sigh. "You know his father,
						
						the captain, 'the wisp of tow,' told us that he was going to bring him
						
						a real mastiff pup, with a black nose, to-day. He thinks that would
						
						comfort Ilusha; but I doubt it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p13">"And how is Ilusha?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p14">"Ah, he is bad, very bad! I believe he's in consumption: he is
						
						quite conscious, but his breathing! His breathing's gone wrong. The
						
						other day he asked to have his boots on to be led round the room. He
						
						tried to walk, but he couldn't stand. 'Ah, I told you before, father,'
						
						he said, 'that those boots were no good. I could never walk properly
						
						in them.' He fancied it was his boots that made him stagger, but it
						
						was simply weakness, really. He won't live another week. Herzenstube
						
						is looking after him. Now they are rich again- they've got heaps of
						
						money.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p15">"They are rogues."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p16">"Who are rogues?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p17">"Doctors and the whole crew of quacks collectively, and also, of
						
						course, individually. I don't believe in medicine. It's a useless
						
						institution. I mean to go into all that. But what's that
						
						sentimentality you've got up there? The whole class seems to be
						
						there every day."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p18">"Not the whole class: it's only ten of our fellows who go to see
						
						him every day. There's nothing in that."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p19">"What I don't understand in all this is the part that Alexey
						
						Karamazov is taking in it. His brother's going to be tried to-morrow
						
						or next day for such a crime, and yet he has so much time to spend
						
						on sentimentality with boys."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p20">"There's no sentimentality about it. You are going yourself now to
						
						make it up with Ilusha."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p21">"Make it up with him? What an absurd expression! But I allow no
						
						one to analyse my actions."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p22">"And how pleased Ilusha will be to see you! He has no idea that
						
						you are coming. Why was it, why was it you wouldn't come all this
						
						time?" Smurov cried with sudden warmth.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p23">"My dear boy, that's my business, not yours.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p24">I am going of myself because I choose to, but you've all been
						
						hauled there by Alexey Karamazov- there's a difference, you know.
						
						And how do you know? I may not be going to make it up at all. It's a
						
						stupid expression."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p25">"It's not Karamazov at all; it's not his doing. Our fellows
						
						began going there of themselves. Of course, they went with Karamazov
						
						at first. And there's been nothing of that sort of silliness. First
						
						one went, and then another. His father was awfully pleased to see
						
						us. You know he will simply go out of his mind if Ilusha dies. He sees
						
						that Ilusha's dying. And he seems so glad we've made it up with
						
						Ilusha. Ilusha asked after you, that was all. He just asks and says no
						
						more. His father will go out of his mind or hang himself. He behaved
						
						like a madman before. You know he is a very decent man. We made a
						
						mistake then. It's all the fault of that murderer who beat him then."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p26">"Karamazov's a riddle to me all the same. I might have made his
						
						acquaintance long ago, but I like to have a proper pride in some
						
						cases. Besides, I have a theory about him which I must work out and
						
						verify."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p27">Kolya subsided into dignified silence. Smurov, too, was silent.
						
						Smurov, of course, worshipped Krassotkin and never dreamed of
						
						putting himself on a level with him. Now he was tremendously
						
						interested at Kolya's saying that he was "going of himself" to see
						
						Ilusha. He felt that there must be some mystery in Kolya's suddenly
						
						taking it into his head to go to him that day. They crossed the
						
						market-place, in which at that hour were many loaded wagons from the
						
						country and a great number of live fowls. The market women were
						
						selling rolls, cottons and threads, etc., in their booths. These
						
						Sunday markets were naively called "fairs" in the town, and there were
						
						many such fairs in the year.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p28">Perezvon ran about in the wildest spirits, sniffing about first
						
						one side, then the other. When he met other dogs they zealously
						
						smelt each other over according to the rules of canine etiquette.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p29">"I like to watch such realistic scenes, Smurov," said Kolya
						
						suddenly. "Have you noticed how dogs sniff at one another when they
						
						meet? It seems to be a law of their nature."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p30">"Yes; it's a funny habit."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p31">"No, it's not funny; you are wrong there. There's nothing funny in
						
						nature, however funny it may seem to man with his prejudices. If
						
						dogs could reason and criticise us they'd be sure to find just as much
						
						that would be funny to them, if not far more, in the social
						
						relations of men, their masters- far more, indeed. I repeat that,
						
						because I am convinced that there is far more foolishness among us.
						
						That's Rakitin's idea- a remarkable idea. I am a Socialist, Smurov."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p32">"And what is a Socialist?" asked Smurov.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p33">"That's when all are equal and all have property in common,
						
						there are no marriages, and everyone has any religion and laws he
						
						likes best, and all the rest of it. You are not old enough to
						
						understand that yet. It's cold, though."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p34">"Yes, twelve degrees of frost. Father looked at the thermometer
						
						just now."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p35">"Have you noticed, Smurov, that in the middle of winter we don't
						
						feel so cold even when there are fifteen or eighteen degrees of
						
						frost as we do now, in the beginning of winter, when there is a sudden
						
						frost of twelve degrees, especially when there is not much snow.
						
						It's because people are not used to it. Everything is habit with
						
						men, everything even in their social and political relations. Habit is
						
						the great motive-power. What a funny-looking peasant!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p36">Kolya pointed to a tall peasant, with a good-natured countenance
						
						in a long sheepskin coat, who was standing by his wagon, clapping
						
						together his hands, in their shapeless leather gloves, to warm them.
						
						His long fair beard was all white with frost.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p37">"That peasant's beard's frozen," Kolya cried in a loud provocative
						
						voice as he passed him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p38">"Lots of people's beards are frozen," the peasant replied,
						
						calmly and sententiously.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p39">"Don't provoke him," observed Smurov.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p40">"It's all right; he won't be cross; he's a nice fellow.
						
						Good-bye, Matvey."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p41">"Good-bye."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p42">"Is your name Matvey?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p43">"Yes. Didn't you know?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p44">"No, I didn't. It was a guess."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p45">"You don't say so! You are a schoolboy, I suppose?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p46">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p47">"You get whipped, I expect?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p48">"Nothing to speak of- sometimes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p49">"Does it hurt?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p50">"Well, yes, it does."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p51">"Ech, what a life!" The peasant heaved a sigh from the bottom of
						
						his heart.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p52">"Good-bye, Matvey."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p53">"Good-bye. You are a nice chap, that you are."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p54">The boys went on.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p55">"That was a nice peasant," Kolya observed to Smurov. "I like
						
						talking to the peasants, and am always glad to do them justice."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p56">"Why did you tell a lie, pretending we are thrashed?" asked
						
						Smurov.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p57">"I had to say that to please him."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p58">"How do you mean?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p59">"You know, Smurov, I don't like being asked the same thing
						
						twice. I like people to understand at the first word. Some things
						
						can't be explained. According to a peasant's notions, schoolboys are
						
						whipped, and must be whipped. What would a schoolboy be if he were not
						
						whipped? And if I were to tell him we are not, he'd be disappointed.
						
						But you don't understand that. One has to know how to talk to the
						
						peasants."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p60">"Only don't tease them, please, or you'll get into another
						
						scrape as you did about that goose."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p61">"So you're afraid?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p62">"Don't laugh, Kolya. Of course I'm afraid. My father would be
						
						awfully cross. I am strictly forbidden to go out with you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p63">"Don't be uneasy, nothing will happen this time. Hallo,
						
						Natasha!" he shouted to a market woman in one of the booths.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p64">"Call me Natasha! What next! My name is Marya," the middle-aged
						
						marketwoman shouted at him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p65">"I am so glad it's Marya. Good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p66">"Ah, you young rascal! A brat like you to carry on so!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p67">"I'm in a hurry. I can't stay now. You shall tell me next Sunday."
						
						Kolya waved his hand at her, as though she had attacked him and not he
						
						her.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p68">"I've nothing to tell you next Sunday. You set upon me, you
						
						impudent young monkey. I didn't say anything," bawled Marya. "You want
						
						a whipping, that's what you want, you saucy jackanapes!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p69">There was a roar of laughter among the other market women round
						
						her. Suddenly a man in a violent rage darted out from the arcade of
						
						shops close by. He was a young man, not a native of the town, with
						
						dark, curly hair and a long, pale face, marked with smallpox. He
						
						wore a long blue coat and a peaked cap, and looked like a merchant's
						
						clerk. He was in a state of stupid excitement and brandished his
						
						fist at Kolya.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p70">"I know you!" he cried angrily, "I know you!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p71">Kolya stared at him. He could not recall when he could have had
						
						a row with the man. But he had been in so many rows in the street that
						
						he could hardly remember them all.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p72">"Do you?" he asked sarcastically.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p73">"I know you! I know you!" the man repeated idiotically.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p74">So much the better for you. Well, it's time I was going.
						
						Good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p75">"You are at your saucy pranks again?" cried the man. "You are at
						
						your saucy pranks again? I know, you are at it again!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p76">"It's not your business, brother, if I am at my saucy pranks
						
						again," said Kolya, standing still and scanning him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p77">"Not my business?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p78">"No; it's not your business."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p79">"Whose then? Whose then? Whose then?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p80">"It's Trifon Nikititch's business, not yours."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p81">"What Trifon Nikititch?" asked the youth, staring with loutish
						
						amazement at Kolya, but still as angry as ever.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p82">Kolya scanned him gravely.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p83">"Have you been to the Church of the Ascension?" he suddenly
						
						asked him, with stern emphasis.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p84">"What Church of Ascension? What for? No, I haven't," said the
						
						young man, somewhat taken aback.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p85">"Do you know Sabaneyev?" Kolya went on even more emphatically
						
						and even more severely.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p86">"What Sabaneyev? No, I don't know him."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p87">"Well then you can go to the devil," said Kolya, cutting short the
						
						conversation; and turning sharply to the right he strode quickly on
						
						his way as though he disdained further conversation with a dolt who
						
						did not even know Sabaneyev.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p88">"Stop, heigh! What Sabaneyev?" the young man recovered from his
						
						momentary stupefaction and was as excited as before. "What did he
						
						say?" He turned to the market women with a silly stare.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p89">The women laughed.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p90">"You can never tell what he's after," said one of them.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p91">"What Sabaneyev is it he's talking about?" the young man repeated,
						
						still furious and brandishing his right arm.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p92">"It must be a Sabaneyev who worked for the Kuzmitchovs, that's who
						
						it must be," one of the women suggested.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p93">The young man stared at her wildly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p94">"For the Kuzmitchovs?" repeated another woman. "But his name
						
						wasn't Trifon. His name's Kuzma, not Trifon; but the boy said Trifon
						
						Nikititch, so it can't be the same."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p95">"His name is not Trifon and not Sabaneyev, it's Tchizhov," put
						
						in suddenly a third woman, who had hitherto been silent, listening
						
						gravely. "Alexey Ivanitch is his name. Tchizhov, Alexey Ivanitch."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p96">"Not a doubt about it, it's Tchizhov," a fourth woman emphatically
						
						confirmed the statement.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p97">The bewildered youth gazed from one to another.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p98">"But what did he ask for, what did he ask for, good people?" he
						
						cried almost in desperation." 'Do you know Sabaneyev?' says he. And
						
						who the devil's to know who is Sabaneyev?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p99">"You're a senseless fellow. I tell you it's not Sabaneyev, but
						
						Tchizhov, Alexey Ivanitch Tchizhov, that's who it is!" one of the
						
						women shouted at him impressively.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p100">"What Tchizhov? Who is he? Tell me, if you know."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p101">"That tall, snivelling fellow who used to sit in the market in the
						
						summer."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p102">"And what's your Tchizhov to do with me, good people, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p103">"How can I tell what he's to do with you?" put in another. "You
						
						ought to know yourself what you want with him, if you make such a
						
						clamour about him. He spoke to you, he did not speak to us, you
						
						stupid. Don't you really know him?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p104">"Know whom?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p105">"Tchizhov."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p106">"The devil take Tchizhov and you with him. I'll give him a hiding,
						
						that I will. He was laughing at me!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p107">"Will give Tchizhov a hiding! More likely he will give you one.
						
						You are a fool, that's what you are!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p108">"Not Tchizhov, not Tchizhov, you spiteful, mischievous woman. I'll
						
						give the boy a hiding. Catch him, catch him, he was laughing at me
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p109">The woman guffawed. But Kolya was by now a long way off,
						
						marching along with a triumphant air. Smurov walked beside him,
						
						looking round at the shouting group far behind. He too was in high
						
						spirits, though he was still afraid of getting into some scrape in
						
						Kolya's company.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p110">"What Sabaneyev did you mean?" he asked Kolya, foreseeing what his
						
						answer would be.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p111">"How do I know? Now there'll be a hubbub among them all day. I
						
						like to stir up fools in every class of society. There's another
						
						blockhead, that peasant there. You know, they say 'there's no one
						
						stupider than a stupid Frenchman,' but a stupid Russian shows it in
						
						his face just as much. Can't you see it all over his face that he is a
						
						fool, that peasant, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p112">"Let him alone, Kolya. Let's go on."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p113">"Nothing could stop me, now I am once off. Hey, good morning,
						
						peasant!"
						
						</p><p id="iii_13-p114"> A sturdy-looking peasant, with a round, simple face and grizzled
						
						beard, who was walking by, raised his head and looked at the boy. He
						
						seemed not quite sober.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p115">"Good morning, if you are not laughing at me," he said
						
						deliberately in reply.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p116">"And if I am?" laughed Kolya.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p117">"Well, a joke's a joke. Laugh away. I don't mind. There's no
						
						harm in a joke."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p118">"I beg your pardon, brother, it was a joke."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p119">"Well, God forgive you!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p120">"Do you forgive me, too?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p121">"I quite forgive you. Go along."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p122">"I say, you seem a clever peasant."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p123">"Cleverer than you," the peasant answered unexpectedly, with
						
						the same gravity.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p124">"I doubt it," said Kolya, somewhat taken aback.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p125">"It's true, though."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p126">"Perhaps it is."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p127">"It is, brother."
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p128">"Good-bye, peasant!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p129">"Good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p130">"There are all sorts of peasants," Kolya observed to Smurov
						
						after a brief silence. "How could I tell I had hit on a clever one?
						
						I am always ready to recognise intelligence in the peasantry."
						
							In the distance the cathedral clock struck half-past eleven. The
						
						boys made haste and they walked as far as Captain Snegiryov's lodging,
						
						a considerable distance, quickly and almost in silence. Twenty paces
						
						from the house Kolya stopped and told Smurov to go on ahead and ask
						
						Karamazov to come out to him.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p131">"One must sniff round a bit first," he observed to Smurov.
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p132">"Why ask him to come out?" Smurov protested. "You go in; they will
						
						be awfully glad to see you. What's the sense of making friends in
						
						the frost out here?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_13-p133">"I know why I want to see him out here in the frost," Kolya cut
						
						him short in the despotic tone he was fond of adopting with "small
						
						boys," and Smurov ran to do his bidding.</p>
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - The Lost Dog" prev="iii_13" next="v_7" id="iv_9">
					
							<p id="iv_9-p1">KOLYA leaned against the fence with an air of dignity, waiting for
						
						Alyosha to appear. Yes, he had long wanted to meet him. He had heard a
						
						great deal about him from the boys, but hitherto he had always
						
						maintained an appearance of disdainful indifference when he was
						
						mentioned, and he had even "criticised" what he heard about Alyosha.
						
						But secretely he had a great longing to make his acquaintance; there
						
						was something sympathetic and attractive in all he was told about
						
						Alyosha. So the present moment was important: to begin with, he had to
						
						show himself at his best, to show his independence. "Or he'll think of
						
						me as thirteen and take me for a boy, like the rest of them. And
						
						what are these boys to him? I shall ask him when I get to know him.
						
						It's a pity I am so short, though. Tuzikov is younger than I am, yet
						
						he is half a head taller. But I have a clever face. I am not
						
						good-looking. I know I'm hideous, but I've a clever face. I mustn't
						
						talk too freely; if I fall into his arms all at once, he may think-
						
						Tfoo! how horrible if he should think- !"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p2">Such were the thoughts that excited Kolya while he was doing his
						
						utmost to assume the most independent air. What distressed him most
						
						was his being so short; he did not mind so much his "hideous" face, as
						
						being so short. On the wall in a corner at home he had the year before
						
						made a pencil-mark to show his height, and every two months since he
						
						anxiously measured himself against it to see how much he had gained.
						
						But alas! he grew very slowly, and this sometimes reduced him almost
						
						to despair. His face was in reality by no means "hideous"; on the
						
						contrary, it was rather attractive, with a fair, pale skin,
						
						freckled. His small, lively grey eyes had a fearless look, and often
						
						glowed with feeling. He had rather high cheekbones; small, very red,
						
						but not very thick, lips; his nose was small and unmistakably turned
						
						up. "I've a regular pug nose, a regular pug nose," Kolya used to
						
						mutter to himself when he looked in the looking-glass, and he always
						
						left it with indignation. "But perhaps I haven't got a clever face?"
						
						he sometimes thought, doubtful even of that. But it must not be
						
						supposed that his mind was preoccupied with his face and his height.
						
						On the contrary, however bitter the moments before the looking-glass
						
						were to him, he quickly forgot them, and forgot them for a long
						
						time, "abandoning himself entirely to ideas and to real life," as he
						
						formulated it to himself.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p3">Alyosha came out quickly and hastened up to Kolya. Before he
						
						reached him, Kolya could see that he looked delighted. "Can he be so
						
						glad to see me?" Kolya wondered, feeling pleased. We may note here, in
						
						passing, that Alyosha's appearance had undergone a complete change
						
						since we saw him last. He had abandoned his cassock and was wearing
						
						now a wellcut coat, a soft, round hat, and his hair had been cropped
						
						short. All this was very becoming to him, and he looked quite
						
						handsome. His charming face always had a good-humoured expression; but
						
						there was a gentleness and serenity in his good-humour. To Kolya's
						
						surprise, Alyosha came out to him just as he was, without an overcoat.
						
						He had evidently come in haste. He held out his hand to Kolya at once.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p4">"Here you are at last! How anxious we've been to see you!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p5">"There were reasons which you shall know directly. Anyway, I am
						
						glad to make your acquaintance. I've long been hoping for an
						
						opportunity, and have heard a great deal about you," Kolya muttered, a
						
						little breathless.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p6">"We should have met anyway. I've heard a great deal about you,
						
						too; but you've been a long time coming here."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p7">"Tell me, how are things going?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p8">"Ilusha is very ill. He is certainly dying."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p9">"How awful! You must admit that medicine is a fraud, Karamazov,"
						
						cried Kolya warmly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p10">"Ilusha has mentioned you often, very often, even in his sleep, in
						
						delirium, you know. One can see that you used to be very, very dear to
						
						him... before the incident... with the knife.... Then there's
						
						another reason.... Tell me, is that your dog?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p11">"Yes Perezvon."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p12">"Not Zhutchka?" Alyosha looked at Kolya with eyes full of pity.
						
						"Is she lost for ever?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p13">"I know you would all like it to be Zhutchka. I've heard all about
						
						it." Kolya smiled mysteriously. "Listen, Karamazov, I'll tell you
						
						all about it. That's what I came for; that's what I asked you to
						
						come out here for, to explain the whole episode to you before we go
						
						in," he began with animation. "You see, Karamazov, Ilusha came into
						
						the preparatory class last spring. Well, you know what our preparatory
						
						class is- a lot of small boys. They began teasing Ilusha at once. I am
						
						two classes higher up, and, of course, I only look on at them from a
						
						distance. I saw the boy was weak and small, but he wouldn't give in to
						
						them; he fought with them. I saw he was proud, and his eyes were
						
						full of fire. I like children like that. And they teased him all the
						
						more. The worst of it was he was horribly dressed at the time, his
						
						breeches were too small for him, and there were holes in his boots.
						
						They worried him about it; they jeered at him. That I can't stand. I
						
						stood up for him at once, and gave it to them hot. I beat them, but
						
						they adore me, do you know, Karamazov?" Kolya boasted impulsively;
						
						"but I am always fond of children. I've two chickens in my hands at
						
						home now- that's what detained me to-day. So they left off beating
						
						Ilusha and I took him under my protection. I saw the boy was proud.
						
						I tell you that, the boy was proud; but in the end he became slavishly
						
						devoted to me: he did my slightest bidding, obeyed me as though I were
						
						God, tried to copy me. In the intervals between the classes he used to
						
						run to me at once' and I'd go about with him. On Sundays, too. They
						
						always laugh when an older boy makes friends with a younger one like
						
						that; but that's a prejudice. If it's my fancy, that's enough. I am
						
						teaching him, developing him. Why shouldn't I develop him if I like
						
						him? Here you, Karamazov, have taken up with all these nestlings. I
						
						see you want to influence the younger generation- to develop them,
						
						to be of use to them, and I assure you this trait in your character,
						
						which I knew by hearsay, attracted me more than anything. Let us get
						
						to the point, though. I noticed that there was a sort of softness
						
						and sentimentality coming over the boy, and you know I have a positive
						
						hatred of this sheepish sentimentality, and I have had it from a baby.
						
						There were contradictions in him, too: he was proud, but he was
						
						slavishly devoted to me, and yet all at once his eyes would flash
						
						and he'd refuse to agree with me; he'd argue, fly into a rage. I
						
						used sometimes to propound certain ideas; I could see that it was
						
						not so much that he disagreed with the ideas, but that he was simply
						
						rebelling against me, because I was cool in responding to his
						
						endearments. And so, in order to train him properly, the tenderer he
						
						was, the colder I became. I did it on purpose: that was my idea. My
						
						object was to form his character, to lick him into shape, to make a
						
						man of him... and besides... no doubt, you understand me at a word.
						
						Suddenly I noticed for three days in succession he was downcast and
						
						dejected, not because of my coldness, but for something else,
						
						something more important. I wondered what the tragedy was. I have
						
						pumped him and found out that he had somehow got to know Smerdyakov,
						
						who was footman to your late father- it was before his death, of
						
						course- and he taught the little fool a silly trick- that is, a
						
						brutal, nasty trick. He told him to take a piece of bread, to stick
						
						a pin in it, and throw it to one of those hungry dogs who snap up
						
						anything without biting it, and then to watch and see what would
						
						happen. So they prepared a piece of bread like that and threw it to
						
						Zhutchka, that shaggy dog there's been such a fuss about. The people
						
						of the house it belonged to never fed it at all, though it barked
						
						all day. (Do you like that stupid barking, Karamazov? I can't stand
						
						it.) So it rushed at the bread, swallowed it, and began to squeal;
						
						it turned round and round and ran away, squealing as it ran out of
						
						sight. That was Ilusha's own account of it. He confessed it to me, and
						
						cried bitterly. He hugged me, shaking all over. He kept on repeating
						
						'He ran away squealing': the sight of that haunted him. He was
						
						tormented by remorse, I could see that. I took it seriously. I
						
						determined to give him a lesson for other things as well. So I must
						
						confess I wasn't quite straightforward, and pretended to be more
						
						indignant perhaps than I was. 'You've done a nasty thing,' I said,
						
						'you are a scoundrel. I won't tell of it, of course, but I shall
						
						have nothing more to do with you for a time. I'll think it over and
						
						let you know through Smurov'- that's the boy who's just come with
						
						me; he's always ready to do anything for me- 'whether I will have
						
						anything to do with you in the future or whether I give you up for
						
						good as a scoundrel.' He was tremendously upset. I must own I felt I'd
						
						gone too far as I spoke, but there was no help for it. I did what I
						
						thought best at the time. A day or two after, I sent Smurov to tell
						
						him that I would not speak to him again. That's what we call it when
						
						two schoolfellows refuse to have anything more to do with one another.
						
						Secretly I only meant to send him to Coventry for a few days and then,
						
						if I saw signs of repentance, to hold out my hand to him again. That
						
						was my intention. But what do you think happened? He heard Smurov's
						
						message, his eyes flashed. 'Tell Krassotkin for me,' he cried, 'that I
						
						will throw bread with pins to all the dogs- all- all of them!' 'So
						
						he's going in for a little temper. We must smoke it out of him.' And I
						
						began to treat him with contempt; whenever I met him I turned away
						
						or smiled sarcastically. And just then that affair with his father
						
						happened. You remember? You must realise that he was fearfully
						
						worked up by what had happened already. The boys, seeing I'd given him
						
						up, set on him and taunted him, shouting, 'Wisp of tow, wisp of
						
						tow!' And he had soon regular skirmishes with them, which I am very
						
						sorry for. They seem to have given him one very bad beating. One day
						
						he flew at them all as they were coming out of school. I stood a few
						
						yards off, looking on. And, I swear, I don't remember that I
						
						laughed; it was quite the other way, I felt awfully sorry for him;
						
						in another minute I would have run up to take his part. But he
						
						suddenly met my eyes. I don't know what he fancied; but he pulled
						
						out a penknife, rushed at me, and struck at my thigh, here in my right
						
						leg. I didn't move. I don't mind owning I am plucky sometimes,
						
						Karamazov. I simply looked at him contemptuously, as though to say,
						
						'This is how you repay all my kindness! Do it again if you like, I'm
						
						at your service.' But he didn't stab me again; he broke down; he was
						
						frightened at what he had done; he threw away the knife, burst out
						
						crying, and ran away. I did not sneak on him, of course, and I made
						
						them all keep quiet, so it shouldn't come to the ears of the
						
						masters. I didn't even tell my mother till it had healed up. And the
						
						wound was a mere scratch. And then I heard that the same day he'd been
						
						throwing stones and had bitten your finger- but you understand now
						
						what a state he was in! Well, it can't be helped: it was stupid of
						
						me not to come and forgive him- that is, to make it up with him-
						
						when he was taken ill. I am sorry for it now. But I had a special
						
						reason. So now I've told you all about it... but I'm afraid it was
						
						stupid of me."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p14">"Oh, what a pity," exclaimed Alyosha, with feeling, "that I didn't
						
						know before what terms you were on with him, or I'd have come to you
						
						long ago to beg you to go to him with me. Would you believe it, when
						
						he was feverish he talked about you in delirium. I didn't know how
						
						much you were to him! And you've really not succeeded in finding
						
						that dog? His father and the boys have been hunting all over the
						
						town for it. Would you believe it, since he's been ill, I've three
						
						times heard him repeat with tears, 'It's because I killed Zhutchka,
						
						father, that I am ill now. God is punishing me for it.' He can't get
						
						that idea out of his head. And if the dog were found and proved to
						
						be alive, one might almost fancy the joy would cure him. We have all
						
						rested our hopes on you."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p15">"Tell me, what made you hope that I should be the one to find
						
						him?" Kolya asked, with great curiosity. "Why did you reckon on me
						
						rather than anyone else?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p16">"There was a report that you were looking for the dog, and that
						
						you would bring it when you'd found it. Smurov said something of the
						
						sort. We've all been trying to persuade Ilusha that the dog is
						
						alive, that it's been seen. The boys brought him a live hare: he
						
						just looked at it, with a faint smile, and asked them to set it free
						
						in the fields. And so we did. His father has just this moment come
						
						back, bringing him a mastiff pup, hoping to comfort him with that; but
						
						I think it only makes it worse."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p17">"Tell me, Karamazov, what sort of man is the father? I know him,
						
						but what do you make of him- a mountebank, a buffoon?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p18">"Oh no; there are people of deep feeling who have been somehow
						
						crushed. Buffoonery in them is a form of resentful irony against those
						
						to whom they daren't speak the truth, from having been for years
						
						humiliated and intimidated by them. Believe me, Krassotkin, that
						
						sort of buffoonery is sometimes tragic in the extreme. His whole
						
						life now is centred in Ilusha, and if Ilusha dies, he will either go
						
						mad with grief or kill himself. I feel almost certain of that when I
						
						look at him now."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p19">"I understand you, Karamazov. I see you understand human
						
						nature," Kolya added, with feeling.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p20">"And as soon as I saw you with a dog, I thought it was Zhutchka
						
						you were bringing."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p21">"Wait a bit, Karamazov, perhaps we shall find it yet; but this
						
						is Perezvon. I'll let him go in now and perhaps it will amuse Ilusha
						
						more than the mastiff pup. Wait a bit, Karamazov, you will know
						
						something in a minute. But, I say, I am keeping you here!" Kolya cried
						
						suddenly. "You've no overcoat on in this bitter cold. You see what
						
						an egoist I am. Oh, we are all egoists, Karamazov!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p22">"Don't trouble; it is cold, but I don't often catch cold. Let us
						
						go in, though, and, by the way, what is your name? I know you are
						
						called Kolya, but what else?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p23">"Nikolay- Nikolay Ivanovitch Krassotkin, or, as they say in
						
						official documents, 'Krassotkin son.'" Kolya laughed for some
						
						reason, but added suddenly, "Of course I hate my name Nikolay."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p24">"Why so?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p25">"It's so trivial, so ordinary."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p26">"You are thirteen?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p27">"No, fourteen- that is, I shall be fourteen very soon, in a
						
						fortnight. I'll confess one weakness of mine, Karamazov, just to
						
						you, since it's our first meeting, so that you may understand my
						
						character at once. I hate being asked my age, more than that... and in
						
						fact... there's a libellous story going about me, that last week I
						
						played robbers with the preparatory boys. It's a fact that I did
						
						play with them, but it's a perfect libel to say I did it for my own
						
						amusement. I have reasons for believing that you've heard the story;
						
						but I wasn't playing for my own amusement, it was for the sake of
						
						the children, because they couldn't think of anything to do by
						
						themselves. But they've always got some silly tale. This is an awful
						
						town for gossip, I can tell you."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p28">"But what if you had been playing for your own amusement, what's
						
						the harm?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p29">"Come, I say, for my own amusement! You don't play horses, do
						
						you?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p30">"But you must look at it like this," said Alyosha, smiling.
						
						"Grown-up people go to the theatre and there the adventures of all
						
						sorts of heroes are represented- sometimes there are robbers and
						
						battles, too- and isn't that just the same thing, in a different form,
						
						of course? And young people's games of soldiers or robbers in their
						
						playtime are also art in its first stage. You know, they spring from
						
						the growing artistic instincts of the young. And sometimes these games
						
						are much better than performances in the theatre; the only
						
						difference is that people go there to look at the actors, while in
						
						these games the young people are the actors themselves. But that's
						
						only natural."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p31">"You think so? Is that your idea?" Kolya looked at him intently.
						
						"Oh, you know, that's rather an interesting view. When I go home, I'll
						
						think it over. I'll admit I thought I might learn something from
						
						you. I've come to learn of you, Karamazov," Kolya concluded, in a
						
						voice full of spontaneous feeling.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p32">"And I of you," said Alyosha, smiling and pressing his hand.
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p33">Kolya was much pleased with Alyosha. What struck him most was that
						
						he treated him exactly like an equal and that he talked to him just as
						
						if he were "quite grown up."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p34">"I'll show you something directly, Karamazov; it's a theatrical
						
						performance, too," he said, laughing nervously. "That's why I've
						
						come."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p35">"Let us go first to the people of the house, on the left. All
						
						the boys leave their coats in there, because the room is small and
						
						hot."
						
							</p><p id="iv_9-p36">"Oh, I'm only coming in for a minute. I'll keep on my overcoat.
						
						Perezvon will stay here in the passage and be dead. Ici, Perezvon, lie
						
						down and be dead! You see how he's dead. I'll go in first and explore,
						
						then I'll whistle to him when I think fit, and you'll see, he'll
						
						dash in like mad. Only Smurov must not forget to open the door at
						
						the moment. I'll arrange it all and you'll see something."</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - By Ilusha's Bedside" prev="iv_9" next="vi_6" id="v_7">
					

							<p id="v_7-p1">THE room inhabited by the family of the retired captain
						
						Snegiryov is already familiar to the reader. It was close and
						
						crowded at that moment with a number of visitors. Several boys were
						
						sitting with Ilusha, and though all of them, like Smurov, were
						
						prepared to deny that it was Alyosha who had brought them and
						
						reconciled them with Ilusha, it was really the fact. All the art he
						
						had used had been to take them, one by one, to Ilusha, without
						
						"sheepish sentimentality," appearing to do so casually and without
						
						design. It was a great consolation to Ilusha in his suffering. He
						
						was greatly touched by seeing the almost tender affection and sympathy
						
						shown him by these boys, who had been his enemies. Krassotkin was
						
						the only one missing and his absence was a heavy load on Ilusha's
						
						heart. Perhaps the bitterest of all his bitter memories was his
						
						stabbing Krassotkin, who had been his one friend and protector. Clever
						
						little Smurov, who was the first to make it up with Ilusha, thought it
						
						was so. But when Smurov hinted to Krassotkin that Alyosha wanted to
						
						come and see him about something, the latter cut him short, bidding
						
						Smurov tell "Karamazov" at once that he knew best what to do, that
						
						he wanted no one's advice, and that, if he went to see Ilusha, he
						
						would choose his own time for he had "his own reasons."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p2">That was a fortnight before this Sunday. That was why Alyosha
						
						had not been to see him, as he had meant to. But though he waited he
						
						sent Smurov to him twice again. Both times Krassotkin met him with a
						
						curt, impatient refusal, sending Alyosha a message not to bother him
						
						any more, that if he came himself, he, Krassotkin, would not go to
						
						Ilusha at all. Up to the very last day, Smurov did not know that Kolya
						
						meant to go to Ilusha that morning, and only the evening before, as he
						
						parted from Smurov, Kolya abruptly told him to wait at home for him
						
						next morning, for he would go with him to the Snegiryovs, but warned
						
						him on no account to say he was coming, as he wanted to drop in
						
						casually. Smurov obeyed. Smurov's fancy that Kolya would bring back
						
						the lost dog was based on the words Kolya had dropped that "they
						
						must be asses not to find the dog, if it was alive." When Smurov,
						
						waiting for an opportunity, timidly hinted at his guess about the dog,
						
						Krassotkin flew into a violent rage. "I'm not such an ass as to go
						
						hunting about the town for other people's dogs when I've got a dog
						
						of my own! And how can you imagine a dog could be alive after
						
						swallowing a pin? Sheepish sentimentality, thats what it is!
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p3">For the last fortnight Ilusha had not left his little bed under
						
						the ikons in the corner. He had not been to school since the day he
						
						met Alyosha and bit his finger. He was taken ill the same day,
						
						though for a month afterwards he was sometimes able to get up and walk
						
						about the room and passage. But latterly he had become so weak that he
						
						could not move without help from his father. His father was terribly
						
						concerned about him. He even gave up drinking and was almost crazy
						
						with terror that his boy would die. And often, especially after
						
						leading him round the room on his arm and putting him back to bed,
						
						he would run to a dark corner in the passage and, leaning his head
						
						against the wall, he would break into paroxysms of violent weeping,
						
						stifling his sobs that they might not be heard by Ilusha.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p4">Returning to the room, he would usually begin doing something to
						
						amuse and comfort his precious boy: he would tell him stories, funny
						
						anecdotes, or would mimic comic people he had happened to meet, even
						
						imitate the howls and cries of animals. But Ilusha could not bear to
						
						see his father fooling and playing the buffoon. Though the boy tried
						
						not to show how he disliked it, he saw with an aching heart that his
						
						father was an object of contempt, and he was continually haunted by
						
						the memory of the "wisp of tow" and that "terrible day."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p5">Nina, Ilusha's gentle, crippled sister, did not like her
						
						father's buffoonery either (Varvara had been gone for some time past
						
						to Petersburg to study at the university). But the half-imbecile
						
						mother was greatly diverted and laughed heartily when her husband
						
						began capering about or performing something. It was the only way
						
						she could be amused; all the rest of the time she was grumbling and
						
						complaining that now everyone had forgotten her, that no one treated
						
						her with respect, that she was slighted, and so on. But during the
						
						last few days she had completely changed. She began looking constantly
						
						at Ilusha's bed in the corner and seemed lost in thought. She was more
						
						silent, quieter, and, if she cried, she cried quietly so as not to
						
						be heard. The captain noticed the change in her with mournful
						
						perplexity. The boys' visits at first only angered her, but later on
						
						their merry shouts and stories began to divert her, and at last she
						
						liked them so much that, if the boys had given up coming, she would
						
						have felt dreary without them. When the children told some story or
						
						played a game, she laughed and clapped her hands. She called some of
						
						them to her and kissed them. She was particularly fond of Smurov.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p6">As for the captain, the presence in his room of the children,
						
						who came to cheer up Ilusha, filled his heart from the first with
						
						ecstatic joy. He even hoped that Ilusha would now get over his
						
						depression and that that would hasten his recovery. In spite of his
						
						alarm about Ilusha, he had not, till lately, felt one minute's doubt
						
						of his boy's ultimate recovery.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p7">He met his little visitors with homage, waited upon them hand
						
						and foot; he was ready to be their horse and even began letting them
						
						ride on his back, but Ilusha did not like the game and it was given
						
						up. He began buying little things for them, gingerbread and nuts, gave
						
						them tea and cut them sandwiches. It must be noted that all this
						
						time he had plenty of money. He had taken the two hundred roubles from
						
						Katerina Ivanovna just as Alyosha had predicted he would. And
						
						afterwards Katerina Ivanovna, learning more about their
						
						circumstances and Ilusha's illness, visited them herself, made the
						
						acquaintance of the family, and succeeded in fascinating the
						
						half-imbecile mother. Since then she had been lavish in helping
						
						them, and the captain, terror-stricken at the thought that his boy
						
						might be dying, forgot his pride and humbly accepted her assistance.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p8">All this time Doctor Herzenstube, who was called in by Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, came punctually every other day, but little was gained by
						
						his visits and he dosed the invalid mercilessly. But on that Sunday
						
						morning a new doctor was expected, who had come from Moscow, where
						
						he had a great reputation. Katerina Ivanovna had sent for him from
						
						Moscow at great expense, not expressly for Ilusha, but for another
						
						object of which more will be said in its place hereafter. But, as he
						
						had come, she had asked him to see Ilusha as well, and the captain had
						
						been told to expect him. He hadn't the slightest idea that Kolya
						
						Krassotkin was coming, though he had long wished for a visit from
						
						the boy for whom Ilusha was fretting.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p9">At the moment when Krassotkin opened the door and came into the
						
						room, the captain and all the boys were round Ilusha's bed, looking at
						
						a tiny mastiff pup, which had only been born the day before, though
						
						the captain had bespoken it a week ago to comfort and amuse Ilusha,
						
						who was still fretting over the lost and probably dead Zhutchka.
						
						Ilusha, who had heard three days before that he was to be presented
						
						with a puppy, not an ordinary puppy, but a pedigree mastiff (a very
						
						important point, of course), tried from delicacy of feeling to pretend
						
						that he was pleased. But his father and the boys could not help seeing
						
						that the puppy only served to recall to his little heart the thought
						
						of the unhappy dog he had killed. The puppy lay beside him feebly
						
						moving and he, smiling sadly, stroked it with his thin, pale, wasted
						
						hand. Clearly he liked the puppy, but... it wasn't Zhutchka; if he
						
						could have had Zhutchka and the puppy, too, then he would have been
						
						completely happy.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p10">"Krassotkin!" cried one of the boys suddenly. He was the first
						
						to see him come in.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p11">Krassotkin's entrance made a general sensation; the boys moved
						
						away and stood on each side of the bed, so that he could get a full
						
						view of Ilusha. The captain ran eagerly to meet Kolya.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p12">"Please come in... you are welcome!" he said hurriedly. "Ilusha,
						
						Mr. Krassotkin has come to see you!
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p13">But Krassotkin, shaking hands with him hurriedly, instantly showed
						
						his complete knowledge of the manners of good society. He turned first
						
						to the captain's wife sitting in her armchair, who was very
						
						ill-humoured at the moment, and was grumbling that the boys stood
						
						between her and Ilusha's bed and did not let her see the new puppy.
						
						With the greatest courtesy he made her a bow, scraping his foot, and
						
						turning to Nina, he made her, as the only other lady present, a
						
						similar bow. This polite behaviour made an extremely favourable
						
						impression on the deranged lady.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p14">"There,.you can see at once he is a young man that has been well
						
						brought up," she commented aloud, throwing up her hands; "But as for
						
						our other visitors they come in one on the top of another."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p15">"How do you mean, mamma, one on the top of another, how is
						
						that?" muttered the captain affectionately, though a little anxious on
						
						her account.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p16">"That's how they ride in. They get on each other's shoulders in
						
						the passage and prance in like that on a respectable family. Strange
						
						sort of visitors!"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p17">"But who's come in like that, mamma?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p18">"Why, that boy came in riding on that one's back and this one on
						
						that one's."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p19">Kolya was already by Ilusha's bedside. The sick boy turned visibly
						
						paler. He raised himself in the bed and looked intently at Kolya.
						
						Kolya had not seen his little friend for two months, and he was
						
						overwhelmed at the sight of him. He had never imagined that he would
						
						see such a wasted, yellow face, such enormous, feverishly glowing eyes
						
						and such thin little hands. He saw, with grieved surprise, Ilusha's
						
						rapid, hard breathing and dry lips. He stepped close to him, held
						
						out his hand, and almost overwhelmed, he said:
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p20">"Well, old man... how are you?" But his voice failed him, he
						
						couldn't achieve an appearance of ease; his face suddenly twitched and
						
						the corners of his mouth quivered. Ilusha smiled a pitiful little
						
						smile, still unable to utter a word. Something moved Kolya to raise
						
						his hand and pass it over Ilusha's hair.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p21">"Never mind!" he murmured softly to him to cheer him up, or
						
						perhaps not knowing why he said it. For a minute they were silent
						
						again.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p22">"Hallo, so you've got a new puppy?" Kolya said suddenly, in a most
						
						callous voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p23">"Ye-es," answered Ilusha in a long whisper, gasping for breath.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p24">"A black nose, that means he'll be fierce, a good house-dog,"
						
						Kolya observed gravely and stolidly, as if the only thing he cared
						
						about was the puppy and its black nose. But in reality he still had to
						
						do his utmost to control his feelings not to burst out crying like a
						
						child, and do what he would he could not control it. "When it grows
						
						up, you'll have to keep it on the chain, I'm sure."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p25">"He'll be a huge dog!" cried one of the boys.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p26">"Of course he will," "a mastiff," "large," "like this," "as big as
						
						a calf," shouted several voices.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p27">"As big as a calf, as a real calf," chimed in the captain. "I
						
						got one like that on purpose, one of the fiercest breed, and his
						
						parents are huge and very fierce, they stand as high as this from
						
						the floor.... Sit down here, on Ilusha's bed, or here on the bench.
						
						You are welcome, we've been hoping to see you a long time.... You were
						
						so kind as to come with Alexey Fyodorovitch?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p28">Krassotkin sat on the edge of the bed, at Ilusha's feet. Though he
						
						had perhaps prepared a free-and-easy opening for the conversation on
						
						his way, now he completely lost the thread of it.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p29">"No... I came with Perezvon. I've got a dog now, called
						
						Perezvon. A Slavonic name. He's out there... if I whistle, he'll run
						
						in. I've brought a dog, too," he said, addressing Ilusha all at
						
						once. "Do you remember Zhutchka, old man?" he suddenly fired the
						
						question at him.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p30">Ilusha's little face quivered. He looked with an agonised
						
						expression at Kolya. Alyosha, standing at the door, frowned and signed
						
						to Kolya not to speak of Zhutchka, but he did not or would not notice.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p31">"Where... is Zhutchka?" Ilusha asked in a broken voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p32">"Oh well, my boy, your Zhutchka's lost and done for!"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p33">Ilusha did not speak, but he fixed an intent gaze once more on
						
						Kolya. Alyosha, catching Kolya's eye, signed to him vigourously again,
						
						but he turned away his eyes pretending not to have noticed.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p34">"It must have run away and died somewhere. It must have died after
						
						a meal like that," Kolya pronounced pitilessly, though he seemed a
						
						little breathless. "But I've got a dog, Perezvon... A Slavonic name...
						
						I've brought him to show you."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p35">"I don't want him!" said Ilusha suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p36">"No, no, you really must see him... it will amuse you. I brought
						
						him on purpose.... He's the same sort of shaggy dog.... You allow me
						
						to call in my dog, madam?" He suddenly addressed Madame Snegiryov,
						
						with inexplicable excitement in his manner.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p37">"I don't want him, I don't want him!" cried Ilusha, with a
						
						mournful break in his voice. There was a reproachful light in his
						
						eyes.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p38">"You'd better," the captain started up from the chest by the
						
						wall on which he had just sat down, "you'd better... another time," he
						
						muttered, but Kolya could not be restrained. He hurriedly shouted to
						
						Smurov, "Open the door," and as soon as it was open, he blew his
						
						whistle. Perezvon dashed headlong into the room.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p39">"Jump, Perezvon, beg! Beg!" shouted Kolya, jumping up, and the dog
						
						stood erect on its hind-legs by Ilusha's bedside. What followed was
						
						a surprise to everyone: Ilusha started, lurched violently forward,
						
						bent over Perezvon and gazed at him, faint with suspense.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p40">"It's... Zhutchka!" he cried suddenly, in a voice breaking with
						
						joy and suffering.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p41">"And who did you think it was?" Krassotkin shouted with all his
						
						might, in a ringing, happy voice, and bending down he seized the dog
						
						and lifted him up to Ilusha.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p42">"Look, old man, you see, blind of one eye and the left ear is
						
						torn, just the marks you described to me. It was by that I found
						
						him. I found him directly. He did not belong to anyone!" he explained,
						
						to the captain, to his wife, to Alyosha and then again to Ilusha.
						
						"He used to live in the Fedotovs' backyard. Though he made his home
						
						there, they did not feed him. He was a stray dog that had run away
						
						from the village... I found him.... You see, old man, he couldn't have
						
						swallowed what you gave him. If he had, he must have died, he must
						
						have! So he must have spat it out, since he is alive. You did not
						
						see him do it. But the pin pricked his tongue, that is why he
						
						squealed. He ran away squealing and you thought he'd swallowed it.
						
						He might well squeal, because the skin of dogs' mouths is so tender...
						
						tenderer than in men, much tenderer!" Kolya cried impetuously, his
						
						face glowing and radiant with delight. Ilusha could not speak. White
						
						as a sheet, he gazed open-mouthed at Kolya, with his great eyes almost
						
						starting out of his head. And if Krassotkin, who had no suspicion of
						
						it, had known what a disastrous and fatal effect such a moment might
						
						have on the sick child's health, nothing would have induced him to
						
						play such a trick on him. But Alyosha was perhaps the only person in
						
						the room who realised it. As for the captain he behaved like a small
						
						child.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p43">"Zhutchka! It's Zhutchka!" he cried in a blissful voice,
						
						"Ilusha, this is Zhutchka, your Zhutchka! Mamma, this is Zhutchka!" He
						
						was almost weeping.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p44">"And I never guessed!" cried Smurov regretfully. "Bravo,
						
						Krassotkin! I said he'd find the dog and here he's found him."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p45">"Here he's found him!" another boy repeated gleefully.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p46">"Krassotkin's a brick! cried a third voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p47">"He's a brick, he's a brick!" cried the other boys, and they began
						
						clapping.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p48">"Wait, wait," Krassotkin did his utmost to shout above them all.
						
						"I'll tell you how it happened, that's the whole point. I found him, I
						
						took him home and hid him at once. I kept him locked up at home and
						
						did not show him to anyone till to-day. Only Smurov has known for
						
						the last fortnight, but I assured him this dog was called Perezvon and
						
						he did not guess. And meanwhile I taught the dog all sorts of
						
						tricks. You should only see all the things he can do! I trained him so
						
						as to bring you a well trained dog, in good condition, old man, so
						
						as to be able to say to you, 'See, old man, what a fine dog your
						
						Zhutchka is now!' Haven't you a bit of meat? He'll show you a trick
						
						that will make you die with laughing. A piece of meat, haven't you got
						
						any?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p49">The captain ran across the passage to the landlady, where their
						
						cooking was done. Not to lose precious time, Kolya, in desperate
						
						haste, shouted to Perezvon, "Dead!" And the dog immediately turned
						
						round and lay on his back with its four paws in the air. The boys
						
						laughed, Ilusha looked on with the same suffering smile, but the
						
						person most delighted with the dog's performance was "mamma." She
						
						laughed at the dog and began snapping her fingers and calling it,
						
						"Perezvon, Perezvon!"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p50">"Nothing will make him get up, nothing!" Kolya cried triumphantly,
						
						proud of his success. "He won't move for all the shouting in the
						
						world, but if I call to him, he'll jump up in a minute. Ici,
						
						Perezvon!" The dog leapt up and bounded about, whining with delight.
						
						The captain ran back with a piece of cooked beef.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p51">"Is it hot?" Kolya inquired hurriedly, with a business-like air,
						
						taking the meat. "Dogs don't like hot things. No, it's all right.
						
						Look, everybody, look, Ilusha, look, old man; why aren't you
						
						looking? He does not look at him, now I've brought him."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p52">The new trick consisted in making the dog stand motionless with
						
						his nose out and putting a tempting morsel of meat just on his nose.
						
						The luckless dog had to stand without moving, with the meat on his
						
						nose, as long as his master chose to keep him, without a movement,
						
						perhaps for half an hour. But he kept Perezvon only for a brief
						
						moment.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p53">"Paid for!" cried Kolya, and the meat passed in a flash from the
						
						dog's nose to his mouth. The audience, of course, expressed enthusiasm
						
						and surprise.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p54">"Can you really have put off coming all this time simply to
						
						train the dog?" exclaimed Alyosha, with an involuntary note of
						
						reproach in his voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p55">"Simply for that!" answered Kolya, with perfect simplicity. "I
						
						wanted to show him in all his glory."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p56">"Perezvon! Perezvon," called Ilusha suddenly, snapping his thin
						
						fingers and beckoning to the dog.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p57">"What is it? Let him jump up on the bed! Ici, Perezvon!" Kolya
						
						slapped the bed and Perezvon darted up by Ilusha. The boy threw both
						
						arms round his head and Perezvon instantly licked his cheek. Ilusha
						
						crept close to him, stretched himself out in bed and hid his face in
						
						the dog's shaggy coat.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p58">"Dear, dear!" kept exclaiming the captain. Kolya sat down again on
						
						the edge of the bed.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p59">"Ilusha, I can show you another trick. I've brought you a little
						
						cannon. You remember, I told you about it before and you said how much
						
						you'd like to see it. Well, here, I've brought it to you."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p60">And Kolya hurriedly pulled out of his satchel the little bronze
						
						cannon. He hurried, because he was happy himself. Another time he
						
						would have waited till the sensation made by Perezvon had passed
						
						off, now he hurried on, regardless of all consideration. "You are
						
						all happy now," he felt, "so here's something to make you happier!" He
						
						was perfectly enchanted himself.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p61">"I've been coveting this thing for a long while; it's for you, old
						
						man, it's for you. It belonged to Morozov, it was no use to him, he
						
						had it from his brother. I swopped a book from father's book-case
						
						for it, A Kinsman of Mahomet, or Salutary Folly, a scandalous book
						
						published in Moscow a hundred years ago, before they had any
						
						censorship. And Morozov has a taste for such things. He was grateful
						
						to me, too...."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p62">Kolya held the cannon in his hand so that all could see and admire
						
						it. Ilusha raised himself, and, with his right arm still round the
						
						dog, he gazed enchanted at the toy. The sensation was even greater
						
						when Kolya announced that he had gunpowder too, and that it could be
						
						fired off at once "if it won't alarm the ladies." "Mamma"
						
						immediately asked to look at the toy closer and her request was
						
						granted. She was much pleased with the little bronze cannon on
						
						wheels and began rolling it to and fro on her lap. She readily gave
						
						permission for the cannon to be fired, without any idea of what she
						
						had been asked. Kolya showed the powder and the shot. The captain,
						
						as a military man, undertook to load it, putting in a minute
						
						quantity of powder. He asked that the shot might be put off till
						
						another time. The cannon was put on the floor, aiming towards an empty
						
						part of the room, three grains of powder were thrust into the
						
						touchhole and a match was put to it. A magnificent explosion followed.
						
						Mamma was startled, but at once laughed with delight. The boys gazed
						
						in speechless triumph. But the captain, looking at Ilusha, was more
						
						enchanted than any of them. Kolya picked up the cannon and immediately
						
						presented it to Ilusha, together with the powder and the shot.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p63">"I got it for you, for you! I've been keeping it for you a long
						
						time," he repeated once more in his delight.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p64">"Oh, give it to me! No, give me the cannon!" mamma began begging
						
						like a little child. Her face showed a piteous fear that she would not
						
						get it. Kolya was disconcerted. The captain fidgeted uneasily.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p65">"Mamma, mamma," he ran to her, "the cannon's yours, of course, but
						
						let Ilusha have it, because it's a present to him, but it's just as
						
						good as yours. Ilusha will always let you play with it; it shall
						
						belong to both of you, both of you."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p66">"No, I don't want it to belong to both of us; I want it to be mine
						
						altogether, not Ilusha's," persisted mamma, on the point of tears.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p67">"Take it, mother, here, keep it!" Ilusha cried. "Krassotkin, may I
						
						give it to my mother?" he turned to Krassotkin with an imploring face,
						
						as though he were afraid he might be offended at his giving his
						
						present to someone else.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p68">"Of course you may," Krassotkin assented heartily, and, taking the
						
						cannon from Ilusha, he handed it himself to mamma with a polite bow.
						
						She was so touched that she cried.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p69">"Ilusha, darling, he's the one who loves his mammal" she said
						
						tenderly, and at once began wheeling the cannon to and fro on her
						
						lap again.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p70">"Mamma, let me kiss your hand." The captain darted up to her at
						
						once and did so.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p71">"And I never saw such a charming fellow as this nice boy," said
						
						the grateful lady, pointing to Krassotkin.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p72">"And I'll bring you as much powder as you like, Ilusha. We make
						
						the powder ourselves now. Borovikov found out how it's made-
						
						twenty-four parts of saltpetre, ten of sulphur and six of birchwood
						
						charcoal. It's all pounded together, mixed into a paste with water and
						
						rubbed through a tammy sieve-that's how it's done."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p73">"Smurov told me about your powder, only father says it's not
						
						real gunpowder," responded Ilusha.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p74">"Not real?" Kolya flushed. "It burns. I don't know, of course."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p75">"No, I didn't mean that," put in the captain with a guilty face.
						
						"I only said that real powder is not made like that, but that's
						
						nothing, it can be made so."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p76">"I don't know, you know best. We lighted some in a pomatum pot, it
						
						burned splendidly, it all burnt away leaving only a tiny ash. But that
						
						was only the paste, and if you rub it through... but of course you
						
						know best, I don't know... And Bulkin's father thrashed him on account
						
						of our powder, did you hear?" he turned to Ilusha.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p77">"We had prepared a whole bottle of it and he used to keep it under
						
						his bed. His father saw it. He said it might explode, and thrashed him
						
						on the spot. He was going to make a complaint against me to the
						
						masters. He is not allowed to go about with me now, no one is
						
						allowed to go about with me now. Smurov is not allowed to either; I've
						
						got a bad name with everyone. They say I'm a 'desperate character,'"
						
						Kolya smiled scornfully. "It all began from what happened on the
						
						railway."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p78">"Ah, we've heard of that exploit of yours, too," cried the
						
						captain. "How could you lie still on the line? Is it possible you
						
						weren't the least afraid, lying there under the train? Weren't you
						
						frightened?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p79">The captain was abject in his flattery of Kolya.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p80">"N- not particularly," answered Kolya carelessly. "What's
						
						blasted my reputation more than anything here was that cursed
						
						goose," he said, turning again to Ilusha- but though he assumed an
						
						unconcerned air as he talked, he still could not control himself and
						
						was continually missing the note he tried to keep up.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p81">"Ah! I heard about the goose!" Ilusha laughed, beaming all over.
						
						"They told me, but I didn't understand. Did they really take you to
						
						the court?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p82">"The most stupid, trivial affair, they made a mountain of a
						
						mole-hill as they always do," Kolya began carelessly. "I was walking
						
						through the market-place here one day, just when they'd driven in
						
						the geese. I stopped and looked at them. All at once a fellow, who
						
						is an errand-boy at Plotnikov's now, looked at me and said, 'What
						
						are you looking at the geese for?' I looked at him; he was a stupid,
						
						moon-faced fellow of twenty. I am always on the side of the peasantry,
						
						you know. I like talking to the peasants.... We've dropped behind
						
						the peasants that's an axiom. I believe you are laughing, Karamazov?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p83">"No, Heaven forbid, I am listening," said Alyosha with a most
						
						good-natured air, and the sensitive Kolya was immediately reassured."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p84">"My theory, Karamazov, is clear and simple," he hurried on
						
						again, looking pleased. "I believe in the people and am always glad to
						
						give them their due, but I am not for spoiling them, that is a sine
						
						qua non... But I was telling you about the goose. So I turned to the
						
						fool and answered, 'I am wondering what the goose thinks about.' He
						
						looked at me quite stupidly, 'And what does the goose think about?' he
						
						asked. 'Do you see that cart full of oats?'I said. 'The oats are
						
						dropping out of the sack, and the goose has put its neck right under
						
						the wheel to gobble them up- do you see?' 'I see that quite well,'
						
						he said. 'Well,' said I, 'if that cart were to move on a little, would
						
						it break the goose's neck or not?' 'It'd be sure to break it,' and
						
						he grinned all over his face, highly delighted. 'Come on, then,'
						
						said I, 'let's try.' 'Let's,' he said. And it did not take us long
						
						to arrange: he stood at the bridle without being noticed, and I
						
						stood on one side to direct the goose. And the owner wasn't looking,
						
						he was talking to someone, so I had nothing to do, the goose thrust
						
						its head in after the oats of itself, under the cart, just under the
						
						wheel. I winked at the lad, he tugged at the bridle, and crack. The
						
						goose's neck was broken in half. And, as luck would have it, all the
						
						peasants saw us at that moment and they kicked up a shindy at once.
						
						'You did that on purpose!' 'No, not on purpose.' 'Yes, you did, on
						
						purpose!' Well, they shouted, 'Take him to the justice of the
						
						peace!' They took me, too. 'You were there, too,' they said, 'you
						
						helped, you're known all over the market!' And, for some reason, I
						
						really am known all over the market," Kolya added conceitedly. "We all
						
						went off to the justice's, they brought the goose, too. The fellow was
						
						crying in a great funk, simply blubbering like a woman. And the farmer
						
						kept shouting that you could kill any number of geese like that. Well,
						
						of course, there were witnesses.
						
						</p><p id="v_7-p85">The justice of the peace settled it in a minute, that the farmer was
						
						to be paid a rouble for the goose, and the fellow to have the goose.
						
						And he was warned not to play such pranks again. And the fellow kept
						
						blubbering like a woman. 'It wasn't me,' he said, 'it was he egged
						
						me on,' and he pointed to me. I answered with the utmost composure
						
						that I hadn't egged him on, that I simply stated the general
						
						proposition, had spoken hypothetically. The justice of the peace
						
						smiled and was vexed with himself once for having smiled. 'I'll
						
						complain to your masters of you, so that for the future you mayn't
						
						waste your time on such general propositions, instead of sitting at
						
						your books and learning your lessons.' He didn't complain to the
						
						masters, that was a joke, but the matter noised abroad and came to the
						
						ears of the masters. Their ears are long, you know! The classical
						
						master, Kolbasnikov, was particularly shocked about it, but Dardanelov
						
						got me off again. But Kolbasnikov is savage with everyone now like a
						
						green ass. Did you know, Ilusha, he is just married, got a dowry of
						
						a thousand roubles, and his bride's a regular fright of the first rank
						
						and the last degree. The third-class fellows wrote an epigram on it:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="v_7-p86" /><p id="v_7-p87">                Astounding news has reached the class,
						
						</p><p id="v_7-p88">                Kolbasnikov has been an ass.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p89" /><p id="v_7-p90">And so on, awfully funny, I'll bring it to you later on. I say
						
						nothing against Dardanelov, he is a learned man, there's no doubt
						
						about it. I respect men like that and it's not because he stood up for
						
						me."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p91">"But you took him down about the founders of Troy!" Smurov put
						
						in suddenly, proud of Krassotkin at such a moment. He was particularly
						
						pleased with the story of the goose.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p92">"Did you really take him down?" the captain inquired, in a
						
						flattering way. "On the question who founded Troy? We heard of it,
						
						Ilusha told me about it at the time."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p93">"He knows everything, father, he knows more than any of us!" put
						
						in Ilusha; "he only pretends to be like that, but really he is top
						
						in every subject..."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p94">Ilusha looked at Kolya with infinite happiness.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p95">"Oh, that's all nonsense about Troy, a trivial matter. I
						
						consider this an unimportant question," said Kolya with haughty
						
						humility. He had by now completely recovered his dignity, though he
						
						was still a little uneasy. He felt that he was greatly excited and
						
						that he had talked about the goose, for instance, with too little
						
						reserve, while Alyosha had looked serious and had not said a word
						
						all the time. And the vain boy began by degrees to have a rankling
						
						fear that Alyosha was silent because he despised him, and thought he
						
						was showing off before him. If he dared to think anything like that,
						
						Kolya would-
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p96">"I regard the question as quite a trivial one," he rapped out
						
						again, proudly.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p97">"And I know who founded Troy," a boy, who had not spoken before,
						
						said suddenly, to the surprise of everyone. He was silent and seemed
						
						to be shy. He was a pretty boy of about eleven, called Kartashov. He
						
						was sitting near the door. Kolya looked at him with dignified
						
						amazement.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p98">The fact was that the identity of the founders of Troy had
						
						become a secret for the whole school, a secret which could only be
						
						discovered by reading Smaragdov, and no one had Smaragdov but Kolya.
						
						One day, when Kolya's back was turned, Kartashov hastily opened
						
						Smaragdov, which lay among Kolya's books, and immediately lighted on
						
						the passage relating to the foundation of Troy. This was a good time
						
						ago, but he felt uneasy and could not bring himself to announce
						
						publicly that he too knew who had founded Troy, afraid of what might
						
						happen and of Krassotkin's somehow putting him to shame over it. But
						
						now he couldn't resist saying it. For weeks he had been longing to.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p99">"Well, who did found it?" Kolya, turning to him with haughty
						
						superciliousness. He saw from his face that he really did know and
						
						at once made up his mind how to take it. There was so to speak, a
						
						discordant note in the general harmony.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p100">"Troy was founded by Teucer, Dardanus, Ilius and Tros," the boy
						
						rapped out at once, and in the same instant he blushed, blushed so,
						
						that it was painful to look at him. But the boys stared at him, stared
						
						at him for a whole minute, and then all the staring eyes turned at
						
						once and were fastened upon Kolya, who was still scanning the
						
						audacious boy with disdainful composure.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p101">"In what sense did they found it?" he deigned to comment at
						
						last. "And what is meant by founding a city or a state? What do they
						
						do? Did they go and each lay a brick, do you suppose?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p102">There was laughter. The offending boy turned from pink to crimson.
						
						He was silent and on the point of tears. Kolya held him so for a
						
						minute.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p103">"Before you talk of a historical event like the foundation of a
						
						nationality, you must first understand what you mean by it," he
						
						admonished him in stern, incisive tones. "But I attach no
						
						consequence to these old wives' tales and I don't think much of
						
						universal history in general," he added carelessly, addressing the
						
						company generally.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p104">"Universal history?" the captain inquired, looking almost scared.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p105">"Yes, universal history! It's the study of the successive
						
						follies of mankind and nothing more. The only subjects I respect are
						
						mathematics and natural science," said Kolya. He was showing off and
						
						he stole a glance at Alyosha; his was the only opinion he was afraid
						
						of there. But Alyosha was still silent and still serious as before. If
						
						Alyosha had said a word it would have stopped him, but Alyosha was
						
						silent and "it might be the silence of contempt," and that finally
						
						irritated Kolya.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p106">"The classical languages, too... they are simply madness,
						
						nothing more. You seem to disagree with me again, Karamazov?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p107">"I don't agree," said Alyosha, with a faint smile.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p108">"The study of the classics, if you ask my opinion, is simply a
						
						police measure, that's simply why it has been introduced into our
						
						schools." By degrees Kolya began to get breathless again. "Latin and
						
						Greek were introduced because they are a bore and because they stupefy
						
						the intellect. It was dull before, so what could they do to make
						
						things duller? It was senseless enough before, so what could they do
						
						to make it more senseless? So they thought of Greek and Latin.
						
						That's my opinion, I hope I shall never change it," Kolya finished
						
						abruptly. His cheeks were flushed.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p109">"That's true," assented Smurov suddenly, in a ringing tone of
						
						conviction. He had listened attentively.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p110">"And yet he is first in Latin himself," cried one of the group
						
						of boys suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p111">"Yes, father, he says that and yet he is first in Latin," echoed
						
						Ilusha.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p112">"What of it?" Kolya thought fit to defend himself, though the
						
						praise was very sweet to him. "I am fagging away at Latin because I
						
						have to, because I promised my mother to pass my examination, and I
						
						think that whatever you do, it's worth doing it well. But in my soul I
						
						have a profound contempt for the classics and all that fraud.... You
						
						don't agree, Karamazov?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p113">"Why 'fraud'?" Alyosha smiled again.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p114">"Well, all the classical authors have been translated into all
						
						languages, so it was not for the sake of studying the classics they
						
						introduced Latin, but solely as a police measure, to stupefy the
						
						intelligence. So what can one call it but a fraud?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p115">"Why, who taught you all this?" cried Alyosha, surprised at last.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p116">"In the first place I am capable of thinking for myself without
						
						being taught. Besides, what I said just now about the classics being
						
						translated our teacher Kolbasnikov has said to the whole of the
						
						third class."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p117">"The doctor has come!" cried Nina, who had been silent till then.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p118">A carriage belonging to Madame Hohlakov drove up to the gate.
						
						The captain, who had been expecting the doctor all the morning, rushed
						
						headlong out to meet him. "Mamma" pulled herself together and
						
						assumed a dignified air. Alyosha went up to Ilusha and began setting
						
						his pillows straight. Nina, from her invalid chair, anxiously
						
						watched him putting the bed tidy. The boys hurriedly took leave.
						
						Some of them promised to come again in the evening. Kolya called
						
						Perezvon and the dog jumped off the bed.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p119">"I won't go away, I won't go away," Kolya said hastily to
						
						Ilusha. "I'll wait in the passage and come back when the doctor's
						
						gone, I'll come back with Perezvon."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p120">But by now the doctor had entered, an important-looking person
						
						with long, dark whiskers and a shiny, shaven chin, wearing a
						
						bearskin coat. As he crossed the threshold he stopped, taken aback; he
						
						probably fancied he had come to the wrong place. "How is this? Where
						
						am I?" he muttered, not removing his coat nor his peaked sealskin cap.
						
						The crowd, the poverty of the room, the washing hanging on a line in
						
						the corner, puzzled him. The captain, bent double, was bowing low
						
						before him.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p121">"It's here, sir, here, sir," he muttered cringingly; "it's here,
						
						you've come right, you were coming to us..."
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p122">"Sne-gi-ryov?" the doctor said loudly and pompously. "Mr.
						
						Snegiryov- is that you?"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p123">"That's me, sir!"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p124">"Ah!"
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p125">The doctor looked round the room with a squeamish air once more
						
						and threw off his coat, displaying to all eyes the grand decoration at
						
						his neck. The captain caught the fur coat in the air, and the doctor
						
						took off his cap.
						
							</p><p id="v_7-p126">"Where is the patient?" he asked emphatically.</p>
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - Precocity" prev="v_7" next="vii_6" id="vi_6">
					
								<p id="vi_6-p1">"WHAT do you think the doctor will say to him?" Kolya asked
						
						quickly. "What a repulsive mug, though, hasn't he? I can't endure
						
						medicine!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p2">"Ilusha is dying. I think that's certain," answered Alyosha,
						
						mournfully.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p3">"They are rogues! Medicine's a fraud! I am glad to have made
						
						your acquaintance, though, Karamazov. I wanted to know you for a
						
						long time. I am only sorry we meet in such sad circumstances."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p4">Kolya had a great inclination to say something even warmer and
						
						more demonstrative, but he felt ill at ease. Alyosha noticed this,
						
						smiled, and pressed his hand.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p5">"I've long learned to respect you as a rare person," Kolya
						
						muttered again, faltering and uncertain. "I have heard you are a
						
						mystic and have been in the monastery. I know you are a mystic, but...
						
						that hasn't put me off. Contact with real life will cure you....
						
						It's always so with characters like yours."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p6">"What do you mean by mystic? Cure me of what?" Alyosha was
						
						rather astonished.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p7">"Oh, God and all the rest of it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p8">"What, don't you believe in God?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p9">"Oh, I've nothing against God. Of course, God is only a
						
						hypothesis, but... I admit that He is needed... for the order of the
						
						universe and all that... and that if there were no God He would have
						
						to be invented," added Kolya, beginning to blush. He suddenly
						
						fancied that Alyosha might think he was trying to show off his
						
						knowledge and to prove that he was "grown up." "I haven't the
						
						slightest desire to show off my knowledge to him," Kolya thought
						
						indignantly. And all of a sudden he felt horribly annoyed.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p10">"I must confess I can't endure entering on such discussions," he
						
						said with a final air. "It's possible for one who doesn't believe in
						
						God to love mankind, don't you think so? Voltaire didn't believe in
						
						God and loved mankind?" ("I am at it again," he thought to himself.)
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p11">"Voltaire believed in God, though not very much, I think, and I
						
						don't think he loved mankind very much either," said Alyosha
						
						quietly, gently, and quite naturally, as though he were talking to
						
						someone of his own age, or even older. Kolya was particularly struck
						
						by Alyosha's apparent diffidence about his opinion of Voltaire. He
						
						seemed to be leaving the question for him, little Kolya, to settle.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p12">"Have you read Voltaire?" Alyosha finished.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p13">"No, not to say read.... But I've read Candide in the Russian
						
						translation... in an absurd, grotesque, old translation.. (At it
						
						again! again!)"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p14">"And did you understand it?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p15">"Oh, yes, everything.... That is... Why do you suppose I shouldn't
						
						understand it? There's a lot of nastiness in it, of course.... Of
						
						course I can understand that it's a philosophical novel and written to
						
						advocate an idea...." Kolya was getting mixed by now. "I am a
						
						Socialist, Karamazov, I am an incurable Socialist," he announced
						
						suddenly, apropos of nothing.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p16">"A Socialist?" laughed Alyosha. "But when have you had time to
						
						become one? Why, I thought you were only thirteen?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p17">Kolya winced.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p18">"In the first place I am not thirteen, but fourteen, fourteen in a
						
						fortnight," he flushed angrily, "and in the second place I am at a
						
						complete loss to understand what my age has to do with it? The
						
						question is what are my convictions, not what is my age, isn't it?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p19">"When you are older, you'll understand for yourself the
						
						influence of age on convictions. I fancied, too, that you were not
						
						expressing your own ideas," Alyosha answered serenely and modestly,
						
						but Kolya interrupted him hotly:
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p20">"Come, you want obedience and mysticism. You must admit that the
						
						Christian religion, for instance, has only been of use to the rich and
						
						the powerful to keep the lower classes in slavery. That's so, isn't
						
						it?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p21">"Ah, I know where you read that, and I am sure someone told you
						
						so!" cried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p22">"I say, what makes you think I read it? And certainly no one
						
						told so. I can think for myself.... I am not opposed to Christ, if you
						
						like. He was a most humane person, and if He were alive to-day, He
						
						would be found in the ranks of the revolutionists, and would perhaps
						
						play a conspicuous part.... There's no doubt about that."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p23">"Oh, where, where did you get that from? What fool have you made
						
						friends with?" exclaimed Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p24">"Come, the truth will out! It has so chanced that I have often
						
						talked to Mr. Rakitin, of course, but... old Byelinsky said that, too,
						
						so they say."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p25">"Byelinsky? I don't remember. He hasn't written that anywhere."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p26">"If he didn't write it, they say he said it. I heard that from
						
						a... but never mind."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p27">"And have you read Byelinsky?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p28">"Well, no... I haven't read all of him, but... I read the
						
						passage about Tatyana, why she didn't go off with Onyegin."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p29">"Didn't go off with Onyegin? Surely you don't... understand that
						
						already?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p30">"Why, you seem to take me for little Smurov," said Kolya, with a
						
						grin of irritation. "But please don't suppose I am such a
						
						revolutionist. I often disagree with Mr. Rakitin. Though I mention
						
						Tatyana, I am not at all for the emancipation of women. I
						
						acknowledge that women are a subject race and must obey. Les femmes
						
						tricottent,* Napoleon said." Kolya, for some reason, smiled, "And on
						
						that question at least I am quite of one mind with that pseudo-great
						
						man. I think, too, that to leave one's own country and fly to
						
						America is mean, worse than mean- silly. Why go to America when one
						
						may be of great service to humanity here? Now especially. There's a
						
						perfect mass of fruitful activity open to us. That's what I answered."
						
						
						
						</p><p id="vi_6-p31"> * Let the women knit.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p32">"What do you mean? Answered whom? Has someone suggested your going
						
						to America already?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p33">"I must own, they've been at me to go, but I declined. That's
						
						between ourselves, of course, Karamazov; do you hear, not a word to
						
						anyone. I say this only to you. I am not at all anxious to fall into
						
						the clutches of the secret police and take lessons at the Chain
						
						bridge.
						
						</p><p id="vi_6-p34" /><p id="vi_6-p35">                    Long will you remember
						
						</p><p id="vi_6-p36">                    The house at the Chain bridge.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p37" /><p id="vi_6-p38">Do you remember? It's splendid. Why are you laughing? You don't
						
						suppose I am fibbing, do you?" ("What if he should find out that
						
						I've only that one number of The Bell in father's book case, and
						
						haven't read any more of it?" Kolya thought with a shudder.)
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p39">"Oh no, I am not laughing and don't suppose for a moment that
						
						you are lying. No, indeed, I can't suppose so, for all this, alas!
						
						is perfectly true. But tell me, have you read Pushkin- Onyegin, for
						
						instance?... You spoke just now of Tatyana."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p40">"No, I haven't read it yet, but I want to read it. I have no
						
						prejudices, Karamazov; I want to hear both sides. What makes you ask?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p41">"Oh, nothing."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p42">"Tell me, Karamazov, have you an awful contempt for me?" Kolya
						
						rapped out suddenly and drew himself up before Alyosha, as though he
						
						were on drill. "Be so kind as to tell me, without beating about the
						
						bush."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p43">"I have a contempt for you?" Alyosha looked at him wondering.
						
						"What for? I am only sad that a charming nature such as yours should
						
						be perverted by all this crude nonsense before you have begun life."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p44">"Don't be anxious about my nature," Kolya interrupted, not without
						
						complacency. "But it's true that I am stupidly sensitive, crudely
						
						sensitive. You smiled just now, and I fancied you seemed to-"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p45">"Oh, my smile meant something quite different. I'll tell you why I
						
						smiled. Not long ago I read the criticism made by a German who had
						
						lived in Russia, on our students and schoolboys of to-day. 'Show a
						
						Russian schoolboy,' he writes, 'a map of the stars, which he knows
						
						nothing about, and he will give you back the map next day with
						
						corrections on it.' No knowledge and unbounded conceit- that's what
						
						the German meant to say about the Russian schoolboy."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p46">"Yes, that's perfectly right," Kolya laughed suddenly, "exactly
						
						so! Bravo the German! But he did not see the good side, what do you
						
						think? Conceit may be, that comes from youth, that will be corrected
						
						if need be, but, on the other hand, there is an independent spirit
						
						almost from childhood, boldness of thought and conviction, and not the
						
						spirit of these sausage makers, grovelling before authority.... But
						
						the German was right all the same. Bravo the German! But Germans
						
						want strangling all the same. Though they are so good at science and
						
						learning they must be strangled."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p47">"Strangled, what for?" smiled Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p48">"Well, perhaps I am talking nonsense, I agree. I am awfully
						
						childish sometimes, and when I am pleased about anything I can't
						
						restrain myself and am ready to talk any stuff. But, I say, we are
						
						chattering away here about nothing, and that doctor has been a long
						
						time in there. But perhaps he's examining the mamma and that poor
						
						crippled Nina. I liked that Nina, you know. She whispered to me
						
						suddenly as I was coming away, 'Why didn't you come before?' And in
						
						such a voice, so reproachfully! I think she is awfully nice and
						
						pathetic."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p49">"Yes, yes! Well, you'll be coming often, you will see what she
						
						is like. It would do you a great deal of good to know people like
						
						that, to learn to value a great deal which you will find out from
						
						knowing these people," Alyosha observed warmly. "That would have
						
						more effect on you than anything."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p50">"Oh, how I regret and blame myself for not having come sooner!"
						
						Kolya exclaimed, with bitter feeling.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p51">"Yes, it's a great pity. You saw for yourself how delighted the
						
						poor child was to see you. And how he fretted for you to come!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p52">"Don't tell me! You make it worse! But it serves me right. What
						
						kept me from coming was my conceit, my egoistic vanity, and the
						
						beastly wilfulness, which I never can get rid of, though I've been
						
						struggling with it all my life. I see that now. I am a beast in lots
						
						of ways, Karamazov!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p53">"No, you have a charming nature, though it's been distorted, and I
						
						quite understand why you have had such an influence on this
						
						generous, morbidly sensitive boy," Alyosha answered warmly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p54">"And you say that to me!" cried Kolya; "and would you believe
						
						it, I thought- I've thought several times since I've been here- that
						
						you despised me! If only you knew how I prize your opinion!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p55">"But are you really so sensitive? At your age! Would you believe
						
						it, just now, when you were telling your story, I thought, as I
						
						watched you, that you must be very sensitive!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p56">"You thought so? What an eye you've got, I say! I bet that was
						
						when I was talking about the goose. That was just when I was
						
						fancying you had a great contempt for me for being in such a hurry
						
						to show off, and for a moment I quite hated you for it, and began
						
						talking like a fool. Then I fancied- just now, here- when I said
						
						that if there were no God He would have to be invented, that I was
						
						in too great a hurry to display my knowledge, especially as I got that
						
						phrase out of a book. But I swear I wasn't showing off out of
						
						vanity, though I really don't know why. Because I was so pleased? Yes,
						
						I believe it was because I was so pleased... though it's perfectly
						
						disgraceful for anyone to be gushing directly they are pleased, I know
						
						that. But I am convinced now that you don't despise me; it was all
						
						my imagination. Oh, Karamazov, I am profoundly unhappy. I sometimes
						
						fancy all sorts of things, that everyone is laughing at me, the
						
						whole world, and then I feel ready to overturn the whole order of
						
						things."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p57">"And you worry everyone about you," smiled Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p58">"Yes, I worry everyone about me, especially my mother.
						
						Karamazov, tell me, am I very ridiculous now?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p59">"Don't think about that, don't think of it at all!" cried Alyosha.
						
						"And what does ridiculous mean? Isn't everyone constantly being or
						
						seeming ridiculous? Besides, nearly all clever people now are
						
						fearfully afraid of being ridiculous, and that makes them unhappy. All
						
						I am surprised at is that you should be feeling that so early,
						
						though I've observed it for some time past,, not only in you. Nowadays
						
						the very children have begun to suffer from it. It's almost a sort
						
						of insanity. The devil has taken the form of that vanity and entered
						
						into the whole generation; it's simply the devil," added Alyosha,
						
						without a trace of the smile that Kolya, staring at him, expected to
						
						see. "You are like everyone else," said Alyosha, in conclusion,
						
						"that is, like very many others. Only you must not be like everybody
						
						else, that's all."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p60">"Even if everyone is like that?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p61">"Yes, even if everyone is like that. You be the only one not
						
						like it. You really are not like everyone else, here you are not
						
						ashamed to confess to something bad and even ridiculous. And who
						
						will admit so much in these days? No one. And people have even
						
						ceased to feel the impulse to self-criticism. Don't be like everyone
						
						else, even if you are the only one."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p62">"Splendid! I was not mistaken in you. You know how to console one.
						
						Oh, how I have longed to know you, Karamazov! I've long been eager for
						
						this meeting. Can you really have thought about me, too? You said just
						
						now that you thought of me, too?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p63">"Yes, I'd heard of you and had thought of you, too... and if
						
						it's partly vanity that makes you ask, it doesn't matter."
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p64">"Do you know, Karamazov, our talk has been like a declaration of
						
						love," said Kolya, in a bashful and melting voice. "That's not
						
						ridiculous, is it?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p65">"Not at all ridiculous, and if it were, it wouldn't matter,
						
						because it's been a good thing." Alyosha smiled brightly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p66">"But do you know, Karamazov, you must admit that you are a
						
						little ashamed yourself, now.... I see it by your eyes." Kolya
						
						smiled with a sort of sly happiness.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p67">"Why ashamed?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p68">"Well, why are you blushing?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p69">"It was you made me blush," laughed Alyosha, and he really did
						
						blush. "Oh, well, I am a little, goodness knows why, I don't know..."
						
						he muttered, almost embarrassed.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p70">"Oh, how I love you and admire you at this moment just because you
						
						are rather ashamed! Because you are just like me," cried Kolya, in
						
						positive ecstasy. His cheeks glowed, his eyes beamed.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p71">"You know, Kolya, you will be very unhappy in your life,"
						
						something made Alyosha say suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p72">"I know, I know. How you know it all before hand!" Kolya agreed at
						
						once.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p73">"But you will bless life on the whole, all the same."
						
							"Just so, hurrah! You are a prophet. Oh, we shall get on together,
						
						Karamazov! Do you know, what delights me most, is that you treat me
						
						quite like an equal. But we are not equals, no, we are not, you are
						
						better! But we shall get on. Do you know, all this last month, I've
						
						been saying to myself, 'Either we shall be friends at once, for
						
						ever, or we shall part enemies to the grave!'"
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p74">"And saying that, of course, you loved me," Alyosha laughed gaily.
						
							</p><p id="vi_6-p75">"I did. I loved you awfully. I've been loving and dreaming of you.
						
						And how do you know it all beforehand? Ah, here's the doctor.
						
						Goodness! What will he tell us? Look at his face!"</p>				
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - Ilusha " prev="vi_6" next="ii_14" id="vii_6">
					
					
						<p id="vii_6-p1">THE doctor came out of the room again, muffled in his fur coat and
						
						with his cap on his head. His face looked almost angry and
						
						disgusted, as though he were afraid of getting dirty. He cast a
						
						cursory glance round the passage, looking sternly at Alyosha and Kolya
						
						as he did so. Alyosha waved from the door to the coachman, and the
						
						carriage that had brought the doctor drove up. The captain darted
						
						out after the doctor, and, bowing apologetically, stopped him to get
						
						the last word. The poor fellow looked utterly crushed; there was a
						
						scared look in his eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p2">"Your Excellency, your Excellency... is it possible?" he began,
						
						but could not go on and clasped his hands in despair. Yet he still
						
						gazed imploringly at the doctor, as though a word from him might still
						
						change the poor boy's fate.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p3">"I can't help it, I am not God!" the doctor answered offhand,
						
						though with the customary impressiveness.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p4">"Doctor... your Excellency... and will it be soon, soon?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p5">"You must be prepared for anything," said the doctor in emphatic
						
						and incisive tones, and dropping his eyes, he was about to step out to
						
						the coach.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p6">"Your Excellency, for Christ's sake!" the terror-stricken
						
						captain stopped him again. "Your Excellency! But can nothing,
						
						absolutely nothing save him now?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p7">"It's not in my hands now," said the doctor impatiently, "but
						
						h'm!..." he stopped suddenly. "If you could, for instance... send...
						
						your patient... at once, without delay" (the words "at once, without
						
						delay," the doctor uttered with an almost wrathful sternness that made
						
						the captain start) "to Syracuse, the change to the new be-ne-ficial
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p8">"To Syracuse!" cried the captain, unable to grasp what was said.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p9">"Syracuse is in Sicily," Kolya jerked out suddenly in explanation.
						
						The doctor looked at him.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p10">"Sicily! Your Excellency," faltered the captain, "but you've
						
						seen"- he spread out his hands, indicating his surroundings- "mamma
						
						and my family?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p11">"N-no, SiciIy is not the place for the family, the family should
						
						go to Caucasus in the early spring... your daughter must go to the
						
						Caucasus, and your wife... after a course of the waters in the
						
						Caucasus for her rheumatism... must be sent straight to Paris to the
						
						mental specialist Lepelletier; I could give you a note to him, and
						
						then... there might be a change-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p12">"Doctor, doctor! But you see!" The captain flung wide his hands
						
						again despairingly, indicating the bare wooden walls of the passage.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p13">"Well, that's not my business," grinned the doctor. "I have only
						
						told you the answer of medical science to your question as to possible
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p14">"Don't be afraid, apothecary, my dog won't bite you," Kolya rapped
						
						out loudly, noticing the doctor's rather uneasy glance at Perezvon,
						
						who was standing in the doorway. There was a wrathful note in
						
						Kolya's voice. He used the word apothecary instead of doctor on
						
						purpose, and, as he explained afterwards, used it "to insult him."
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p15">"What's that?" The doctor flung up his head, staring with surprise
						
						at Kolya. "Who's this?" he addressed Alyosha, as though asking him
						
						to explain.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p16">"It's Perezvon's master, don't worry about me," Kolya said
						
						incisively again.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p17">"Perezvon?"* repeated the doctor, perplexed.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p18" /><p id="vii_6-p19">* i.e. a chime of bells.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p20" /><p id="vii_6-p21">"He hears the bell, but where it is he cannot tell. Good-bye, we
						
						shall meet in Syracuse."
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p22">"Who's this? Who's this?" The doctor flew into a terrible rage.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p23">"He is a schoolboy, doctor, he is a mischievous boy; take no
						
						notice of him," said Alyosha, frowning and speaking quickly. "Kolya,
						
						hold your tongue!" he cried to Krassotkin. "Take no notice of him,
						
						doctor," he repeated, rather impatiently.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p24">"He wants a thrashing, a good thrashing!" The doctor stamped in
						
						a perfect fury.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p25">"And you know, apothecary, my Perezvon might bite!" said Kolya,
						
						turning pale, with quivering voice and flashing eyes. "Ici, Perezvon!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p26">"Kolya, if you say another word, I'll have nothing more to do with
						
						you," Alyosha cried peremptorily.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p27">"There is only one man in the world who can command Nikolay
						
						Krassotkin- this is the man," Kolya pointed to Alyosha. "I obey him,
						
						good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p28">He stepped forward, opened the door, and quickly went into the
						
						inner room. Perezvon flew after him. The doctor stood still for five
						
						seconds in amazement, looking at Alyosha; then, with a curse, he
						
						went out quickly to the carriage, repeating aloud, "This is... this
						
						is... I don't know what it is!" The captain darted forward to help him
						
						into the carriage. Alyosha followed Kolya into the room. He was
						
						already by Ilusha's bedside. The sick boy was holding his hand and
						
						calling for his father. A minute later the captain, too, came back.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p29">"Father, father, come... we..." Ilusha faltered in violent
						
						excitement, but apparently unable to go on, he flung his wasted
						
						arms, found his father and Kolya, uniting them in one embrace, and
						
						hugging them as tightly as he could. The captain suddenly began to
						
						shake with dumb sobs, and Kolya's lips and chin twitched.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p30">"Father, father! How sorry I am for you!" Ilusha moaned bitterly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p31">"Ilusha... darling... the doctor said... you would be all right...
						
						we shall be happy... the doctor... " the captain began.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p32">"Ah, father! I know what the new doctor said to you about me.... I
						
						saw!" cried Ilusha, and again he hugged them both with all his
						
						strength, hiding his face on his father's shoulder.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p33">"Father, don't cry, and when I die get a good boy, another
						
						one... choose one of them all, a good one, call him Ilusha and love
						
						him instead of me..."
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p34">"Hush, old man, you'll get well," Krassotkin cried suddenly, in
						
						a voice that sounded angry.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p35">"But don't ever forget me, father," Ilusha went on, "come to my
						
						grave...and father, bury me by our big stone, where we used to go
						
						for our walk, and come to me there with Krassotkin in the evening...
						
						and Perezvon... I shall expect you.... Father, father!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p36">His voice broke. They were all three silent, still embracing. Nina
						
						was crying, quietly in her chair, and at last seeing them all
						
						crying, "mamma," too, burst into tears.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p37">"Ilusha! Ilusha!" she exclaimed.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p38">Krassotkin suddenly released himself from Ilusha's embrace.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p39">"Good-bye, old man, mother expects me back to dinner," he said
						
						quickly. "What a pity I did not tell her! She will be dreadfully
						
						anxious... But after dinner I'll come back to you for the whole day,
						
						for the whole evening, and I'll tell you all sorts of things, all
						
						sorts of things. And I'll bring Perezvon, but now I will take him with
						
						me, because he will begin to howl when I am away and bother you.
						
						Good-bye!
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p40">And he ran out into the passage. He didn't want to cry, but in the
						
						passage he burst into tears. Alyosha found him crying.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p41">"Kolya, you must be sure to keep your word and come, or he will be
						
						terribly disappointed," Alyosha said emphatically.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p42">"I will! Oh, how I curse myself for not having come before"
						
						muttered Kolya, crying, and no longer ashamed of it.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p43">At that moment the captain flew out of the room, and at once
						
						closed the door behind him. His face looked frenzied, his lips were
						
						trembling. He stood before the two and flung up his arms.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p44">"I don't want a good boy! I don't want another boy!" he muttered
						
						in a wild whisper, clenching his teeth. "If I forget thee,
						
						knees before the wooden bench. Pressing his fists against his head, he
						
						began sobbing with absurd whimpering cries, doing his utmost that
						
						his cries should not be heard in the room.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p45">Kolya ran out into the street.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p46">"Good-bye, Karamazov? Will you come yourself?" he cried sharply
						
						and angrily to Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p47">"I will certainly come in the evening."
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p48">"What was that he said about Jerusalem?... What did he mean by
						
						that?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p49">"It's from the Bible. 'If I forget thee, Jerusalem,' that is, if I
						
						forget all that is most precious to me, if I let anything take its
						
						place, then may-"
						
							</p><p id="vii_6-p50">"I understand, that's enough! Mind you come! Ici, Perezvon!" he
						
						cried with positive ferocity to the dog, and with rapid strides he
						
						went home.</p>
					
					</div4> 			
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book XI - Ivan" prev="vii_6" next="i_16" id="ii_14">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - At Grushenka's" prev="ii_14" next="ii_15" id="i_16">
					
						<p id="i_16-p1">ALYOSHA went towards the cathedral square to the widow Morozov's
						
						house to see Grushenka, who had sent Fenya to him early in the morning
						
						with an urgent message begging him to come. Questioning Fenya, Alyosha
						
						learned that her mistress had been particularly distressed since the
						
						previous day. During the two months that had passed since Mitya's
						
						arrest, Alyosha had called frequently at the widow Morozov's house,
						
						both from his own inclination and to take messages for Mitya. Three
						
						days after Mitya's arrest, Grushenka was taken very ill and was ill
						
						for nearly five weeks. For one whole week she was unconscious. She was
						
						very much changed- thinner and a little sallow, though she had for the
						
						past fortnight been well enough to go out. But to Alyosha her face was
						
						even more attractive than before, and he liked to meet her eyes when
						
						he went in to her. A look of firmness and intelligent purpose had
						
						developed in her face. There were signs of a spiritual
						
						transformation in her, and a steadfast, fine and humble
						
						determination that nothing could shake could be discerned in her.
						
						There was a small vertical line between her brows which gave her
						
						charming face a look of concentrated thought, almost austere at the
						
						first glance. There was scarcely a trace of her former frivolity.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p2">It seemed strange to Alyosha, too, that in spite of the calamity
						
						that had overtaken the poor girl, betrothed to a man who had been
						
						arrested for a terrible crime, almost at the instant of their
						
						betrothal, in spite of her illness and the almost inevitable
						
						sentence hanging over Mitya, Grushenka had not yet lost her youthful
						
						cheerfulness. There was a soft light in the once proud eyes, though at
						
						times they gleamed with the old vindictive fire when she was visited
						
						by one disturbing thought stronger than ever in her heart. The
						
						object of that uneasiness was the same as ever- Katerina Ivanovna,
						
						of whom Grushenka had even raved when she lay in delirium. Alyosha
						
						knew that she was fearfully jealous of her. Yet Katerina Ivanovna
						
						had not once visited Mitya in his prison, though she might have done
						
						it whenever she liked. All this made a difficult problem for
						
						Alyosha, for he was the only person to whom Grushenka opened her heart
						
						and from whom she was continually asking advice. Sometimes he was
						
						unable to say anything.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p3">Full of anxiety he entered her lodging. She was at home. She had
						
						returned from seeing Mitya half an hour before, and from the rapid
						
						movement with which she leapt up from her chair to meet him he saw
						
						that she had been expecting him with great impatience. A pack of cards
						
						dealt for a game of "fools" lay on the table. A bed had been made up
						
						on the leather sofa on the other side and Maximov lay, half reclining,
						
						on it. He wore a dressing-gown and a cotton nightcap, and was
						
						evidently ill and weak, though he was smiling blissfully. When the
						
						homeless old man returned with Grushenka from Mokroe two months
						
						before, he had simply stayed on and was still staying with her. He
						
						arrived with her in rain and sleet, sat down on the sofa, drenched and
						
						scared, and gazed mutely at her with a timid, appealing smile.
						
						Grushenka, who was in terrible grief and in the first stage of
						
						fever, almost forgot his existence in all she had to do the first half
						
						hour after her arrival. Suddenly she chanced to look at him
						
						intently: he laughed a pitiful, helpless little laugh. She called
						
						Fenya and told her to give him something to eat. All that day he sat
						
						in the same place, almost without stirring. When it got dark and the
						
						shutters were closed, Fenya asked her mistress:
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p4">"Is the gentleman going to stay the night, mistress?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p5">"Yes; make him a bed on the sofa," answered Grushenka.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p6">Questioning him more in detail, Grushenka learned from him that he
						
						had literally nowhere to go, and that "Mr. Kalganov, my benefactor,
						
						told me straight that he wouldn't receive me again and gave me five
						
						roubles."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p7">"Well, God bless you, you'd better stay, then," Grushenka
						
						decided in her grief, smiling compassionately at him. Her smile
						
						wrung the old man's heart and his lips twitched with grateful tears.
						
						And so the destitute wanderer had stayed with her ever since. He did
						
						not leave the house even when she was ill. Fenya and her
						
						grandmother, the cook, did not turn him out, but went on serving him
						
						meals and making up his bed on the sofa. Grushenka had grown used to
						
						him, and coming back from seeing Mitya (whom she had begun to visit in
						
						prison before she was really well) she would sit down and begin
						
						talking to "Maximushka" about trifling matters, to keep her from
						
						thinking of her sorrow. The old man turned out to be a good
						
						story-teller on occasions, so that at last he became necessary to her.
						
						Grushenka saw scarcely anyone else beside Alyosha, who did not come
						
						every day and never stayed long. Her old merchant lay seriously ill at
						
						this time, "at his last gasp" as they said in the town, and he did, in
						
						fact, die a week after Mitya's trial. Three weeks before his death,
						
						feeling the end approaching, he made his sons, their wives and
						
						children, come upstairs to him at last and bade them not leave him
						
						again. From that moment he gave strict orders to his servants not to
						
						admit Grushenka and to tell her if she came, "The master wishes you
						
						long life and happiness and tells you to forget him." But Grushenka
						
						sent almost every day to inquire after him.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p8">"You've come at last!" she cried, flinging down the cards and
						
						joyfully greeting Alyosha, "and Maximushka's been scaring me that
						
						perhaps you wouldn't come. Ah, how I need you! Sit down to the
						
						table. What will you have coffee?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p9">"Yes, please," said Alyosha, sitting down at the table. "I am very
						
						hungry."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p10">"That's right. Fenya, Fenya, coffee," cried Grushenka. "It's
						
						been made a long time ready for you. And bring some little pies, and
						
						mind they are hot. Do you know, we've had a storm over those pies
						
						to-day. I took them to the prison for him, and would you believe it,
						
						he threw them back to me: he would not eat them. He flung one of
						
						them on the floor and stamped on it. So I said to him: 'I shall
						
						leave them with the warder; if you don't eat them before evening, it
						
						will be that your venomous spite is enough for you!' With that I
						
						went away. We quarrelled again, would you believe it? Whenever I go we
						
						quarrel."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p11">Grushenka said all this in one breath in her agitation. Maximov,
						
						feeling nervous, at once smiled and looked on the floor.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p12">"What did you quarrel about this time?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p13">"I didn't expect it in the least. Only fancy, he is jealous of the
						
						Pole. 'Why are you keeping him?' he said. 'So you've begun keeping
						
						him.' He is jealous, jealous of me all the time, jealous eating and
						
						sleeping! He even took into his head to be jealous of Kuzma last
						
						week."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p14">"But he knew about the Pole before?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p15">"Yes, but there it is. He has known about him from the very
						
						beginning but to-day he suddenly got up and began scolding about
						
						him. I am ashamed to repeat what he said. Silly fellow! Rakitin went
						
						in as I came out. Perhaps Rakitin is egging him on. What do you
						
						think?" she added carelessly.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p16">"He loves you, that's what it is; he loves you so much. And now he
						
						is particularly worried."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p17">"I should think he might be, with the trial to-morrow. And I
						
						went to him to say something about to-morrow, for I dread to think
						
						what's going to happen then. You say that he is worried, but how
						
						worried I am! And he talks about the Pole! He's too silly! He is not
						
						jealous of Maximushka yet, anyway."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p18">"My wife was dreadfully jealous over me, too," Maximov put in
						
						his word.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p19">"Jealous of you?" Grushenka laughed in spite of herself. "Of
						
						whom could she have been jealous?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p20">"Of the servant girls."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p21">"Hold your tongue, Maximushka, I am in no laughing mood now; I
						
						feel angry. Don't ogle the pies. I shan't give you any; they are not
						
						good for you, and I won't give you any vodka either. I have to look
						
						after him, too, just as though I kept an almshouse," she laughed.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p22">"I don't deserve your kindness. I am a worthless creature," said
						
						Maximov, with tears in his voice. "You would do better to spend your
						
						kindness on people of more use than me."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p23">"Ech, everyone is of use, Maximushka, and how can we tell who's of
						
						most use? If only that Pole didn't exist, Alyosha. He's taken it
						
						into his head to fall ill, too, to-day. I've been to see him also. And
						
						I shall send him some pies, too, on purpose. I hadn't sent him any,
						
						but Mitya accused me of it, so now I shall send some! Ah, here's Fenya
						
						with a letter! Yes, it's from the Poles- begging again!
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p24">Pan Mussyalovitch had indeed sent an extremely long and
						
						characteristically eloquent letter in which he begged her to lend
						
						him three roubles. In the letter was enclosed a receipt for the sum,
						
						with a promise to repay it within three months, signed by Pan
						
						Vrublevsky as well. Grushenka had received many such letters,
						
						accompanied by such receipts, from her former lover during the
						
						fortnight of her convalescence. But she knew that the two Poles had
						
						been to ask after her health during her illness. The first letter
						
						Grushenka got from them was a long one, written on large notepaper and
						
						with a big family crest on the seal. It was so obscure and
						
						rhetorical that Grushenka put it down before she had read half, unable
						
						to make head or tail of it. She could not attend to letters then.
						
						The first letter was followed next day by another in which Pan
						
						Mussyalovitch begged her for a loan of two thousand roubles for a very
						
						short period. Grushenka left that letter, too, unanswered. A whole
						
						series of letters had followed- one every day- all as pompous and
						
						rhetorical, but the loan asked for, gradually diminishing, dropped
						
						to a hundred roubles, than to twenty-five, to ten, and finally
						
						Grushenka received a letter in which both the Poles begged her for
						
						only one rouble and included a receipt signed by both.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p25">Then Grushenka suddenly felt sorry for them, and at dusk she
						
						went round herself to their lodging. She found the two Poles in
						
						great poverty, almost destitution, without food or fuel, without
						
						cigarettes, in debt to their landlady. The two hundred roubles they
						
						had carried off from Mitya at Mokroe had soon disappeared. But
						
						Grushenka was surprised at their meeting her with arrogant dignity and
						
						self-assertion, with the greatest punctilio and pompous speeches.
						
						Grushenka simply laughed, and gave her former admirer ten roubles.
						
						Then, laughing, she told Mitya of it and he was not in the least
						
						jealous. But ever since, the Poles had attached themselves to
						
						Grushenka and bombarded her daily with requests for money and she
						
						had always sent them small sums. And now that day Mitya had taken it
						
						into his head to be fearfully jealous.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p26">"Like a fool, I went round to him just for a minute, on the way to
						
						see Mitya, for he is ill, too, my Pole," Grushenka began again with
						
						nervous haste. "I was laughing, telling Mitya about it. 'Fancy,' I
						
						said, 'my Pole had the happy thought to sing his old songs to me to
						
						the guitar. He thought I would be touched and marry him!' Mitya
						
						leapt up swearing.... So, there, I'll send them the pies! Fenya, is it
						
						that little girl they've sent? Here, give her three roubles and pack
						
						up a dozen pies in a paper and tell her to take them. And you,
						
						Alyosha, be sure to tell Mitya that I did send them the pies."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p27">"I wouldn't tell him for anything," said Alyosha, smiling.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p28">"Ech! You think he is unhappy about it. Why, he's jealous on
						
						purpose. He doesn't care," said Grushenka bitterly.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p29">"On purpose?" queried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p30">"I tell you you are silly, Alyosha. You know nothing about it,
						
						with all your cleverness. I am not offended that he is jealous of a
						
						girl like me. I would be offended if he were not jealous. I am like
						
						that. I am not offended at jealousy. I have a fierce heart, too. I can
						
						be jealous myself. Only what offends me is that he doesn't love me
						
						at all. I tell you he is jealous now on purpose. Am I blind? Don't I
						
						see? He began talking to me just now of that woman, of Katerina,
						
						saying she was this and that, how she had ordered a doctor from Moscow
						
						for him, to try and save him; how she had ordered the best counsel,
						
						the most learned one, too. So he loves her, if he'll praise her to
						
						my face, more shame to him! He's treated me badly himself, so he
						
						attacked me, to make out I am in fault first and to throw it all on
						
						me. 'You were with your Pole before me, so I can't be blamed for
						
						Katerina,' that's what it amounts to. He wants to throw the whole
						
						blame on me. He attacked me on purpose, on purpose, I tell you, but
						
						I'll-"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p31">Grushenka could not finish saying what she would do. She hid her
						
						eyes in her handkerchief and sobbed violently.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p32">"He doesn't love Katerina Ivanovna," said Alyosha firmly.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p33">"Well, whether he loves her or not, I'll soon find out for
						
						myself," said Grushenka, with a menacing note in her voice, taking the
						
						handkerchief from her eyes. Her face was distorted. Alyosha saw
						
						sorrowfully that from being mild and serene, it had become sullen
						
						and spiteful.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p34">"Enough of this foolishness," she said suddenly; "it's not for
						
						that I sent for you. Alyosha, darling, to-morrow- what will happen
						
						to-morrow? That's what worries me! And it's only me it worries! I look
						
						at everyone and no one is thinking of it. No one cares about it. Are
						
						you thinking about it even? To-morrow he'll be tried, you know. Tell
						
						me, how will he be tried? You know it's the valet, the valet killed
						
						him! Good heavens! Can they condemn him in place of the valet and will
						
						no one stand up for him? They haven't troubled the valet at all,
						
						have they?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p35">"He's been severely cross-examined," observed Alyosha
						
						thoughtfully; "but everyone came to the conclusion it was not he.
						
						Now he is lying very ill. He has been ill ever since that attack.
						
						Really ill," added Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p36">"Oh, dear! couldn't you go to that counsel yourself and tell him
						
						the whole thing by yourself? He's been brought from Petersburg for
						
						three thousand roubles, they say."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p37">"We gave these three thousand together- Ivan, Katerina Ivanovna
						
						and I- but she paid two thousand for the doctor from Moscow herself.
						
						The counsel Fetyukovitch would have charged more, but the case has
						
						become known all over Russia; it's talked of in all the papers and
						
						journals. Fetyukovitch agreed to come more for the glory of the thing,
						
						because the case has become so notorious. I saw him yesterday."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p38">"Well? Did you talk to him?" Grushenka put in eagerly.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p39">"He listened and said nothing. He told me that he had already
						
						formed his opinion. But he promised to give my words consideration."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p40">"Consideration! Ah, they are swindlers! They'll ruin him. And
						
						why did she send for the doctor?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p41">"As an expert. They want to prove that Mitya's mad and committed
						
						the murder when he didn't know what he was doing," Alyosha smiled
						
						gently, "but Mitya won't agree to that."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p42">"Yes; but that would be the truth if he had killed him!" cried
						
						Grushenka. "He was mad then, perfectly mad, and that was my fault,
						
						wretch that I am! But, of course, he didn't do it, he didn't do it!
						
						And they are all against him, the whole town. Even Fenya's evidence
						
						went to prove he had done it. And the people at the shop, and that
						
						official, and at the tavern, too, before, people had heard him say so!
						
						They are all, all against him, all crying out against him."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p43">"Yes, there's a fearful accumulation of evidence," Alyosha
						
						observed grimly.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p44">"And Grigory- Grigory Vassilyevitch- sticks to his story that
						
						the door was open, persists that he saw it- there's no shaking him.
						
						I went and talked to him myself. He's rude about it, too."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p45">"Yes, that's perhaps the strongest evidence against him," said
						
						Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p46">"And as for Mitya's being mad, he certainly seems like it now,"
						
						Grushenka began with a peculiarly anxious and mysterious air. "Do
						
						you know, Alyosha, I've been wanting to talk to you about it for a
						
						long time. I go to him every day and simply wonder at him. Tell me,
						
						now, what do you suppose he's always talking about? He talks and talks
						
						and I can make nothing of it. I fancied he was talking of something
						
						intellectual that I couldn't understand in my foolishness. Only he
						
						suddenly began talking to me about a babe- that is, about some
						
						child. 'Why is the babe poor?' he said. 'It's for that babe I am going
						
						to Siberia now. I am not a murderer, but I must go to Siberia!' What
						
						that meant, what babe, I couldn't tell for the life of me. Only I
						
						cried when he said it, because he said it so nicely. He cried himself,
						
						and I cried, too. He suddenly kissed me and made the sign of the cross
						
						over me. What did it mean, Alyosha, tell me? What is this babe?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p47">"It must be Rakitin, who's been going to see him lately," smiled
						
						Alyosha, "though... that's not Rakitin's doing. I didn't see Mitya
						
						yesterday. I'll see him to-day."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p48">"No, it's not Rakitin; it's his brother Ivan Fyodorovitch
						
						upsetting him. It's his going to see him, that's what it is,"
						
						Grushenka began, and suddenly broke off. Alyosha gazed at her in
						
						amazement.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p49">"Ivan's going? Has he been to see him? Mitya told me himself
						
						that Ivan hasn't been once."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p50">"There... there! What a girl I am! Blurting things out!" exclaimed
						
						Grushenka, confused and suddenly blushing. "Stay, Alyosha, hush! Since
						
						I've said so much I'll tell the whole truth- he's been to see him
						
						twice, the first directly he arrived. He galloped here from Moscow
						
						at once, of course, before I was taken ill; and the second time was
						
						a week ago. He told Mitya not to tell you about it, under any
						
						circumstances; and not to tell anyone, in fact. He came secretly."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p51">Alyosha sat plunged in thought, considering something. The news
						
						evidently impressed him.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p52">"Ivan doesn't talk to me of Mitya's case," he said slowly. "He's
						
						said very little to me these last two months. And whenever I go to see
						
						him, he seems vexed at my coming, so I've not been to him for the last
						
						three weeks. H'm!... if he was there a week ago... there certainly has
						
						been a change in Mitya this week."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p53">"There has been a change," Grushenka assented quickly. "They
						
						have a secret, they have a secret! Mitya told me himself there was a
						
						secret, and such a secret that Mitya can't rest. Before then, he was
						
						cheerful- and, indeed, he is cheerful now- but when he shakes his head
						
						like that, you know, and strides about the room and keeps pulling at
						
						the hair on his right temple with his right hand, I know there is
						
						something on his mind worrying him.... I know! He was cheerful before,
						
						though, indeed, he is cheerful to-day."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p54">"But you said he was worried."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p55">"Yes, he is worried and yet cheerful. He keeps on being
						
						irritable for a minute and then cheerful and then irritable again. And
						
						you know, Alyosha, I am constantly wondering at him- with this awful
						
						thing hanging over him, he sometimes laughs at such trifles as
						
						though he were a baby himself."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p56">"And did he really tell you not to tell me about Ivan? Did he say,
						
						'Don't tell him'?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p57">"Yes, he told me, 'Don't tell him.' It's you that Mitya's most
						
						afraid of. Because it's a secret: he said himself it was a secret.
						
						Alyosha, darling, go to him and find out what their secret is and come
						
						and tell me," Grushenka besought him with sudden eagerness. "Set my
						
						mind at rest that I may know the worst that's in store for me.
						
						That's why I sent for you."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p58">"You think it's something to do with you? If it were, he
						
						wouldn't have told you there was a secret."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p59">"I don't know. Perhaps he wants to tell me, but doesn't dare to.
						
						He warns me. There is a secret, he tells me, but he won't tell me what
						
						it is."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p60">"What do you think yourself?"
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p61">"What do I think? It's the end for me, that's what I think. They
						
						all three have been plotting my end, for Katerina's in it. It's all
						
						Katerina, it all comes from her. She is this and that, and that
						
						means that I am not. He tells me that beforehand- warns me. He is
						
						planning to throw me over, that's the whole secret. They've planned it
						
						together, the three of them- Mitya, Katerina, and Ivan Fyodorovitch.
						
						Alyosha, I've been wanting to ask you a long time. A week ago he
						
						suddenly told me that Ivan was in love with Katerina, because he often
						
						goes to see her. Did he tell me the truth or not? Tell me, on your
						
						conscience, tell me the worst."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p62">"I won't tell you a lie. Ivan is not in love with Katerina
						
						Ivanovna, I think."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p63">"Oh, that's what I thought! He is lying to me, shameless deceiver,
						
						that's what it is! And he was jealous of me just now, so as to put the
						
						blame on me afterwards. He is stupid, he can't disguise what he is
						
						doing; he is so open, you know.... But I'll give it to him, I'll
						
						give it to him! 'You believe I did it,' he said. He said that to me,
						
						to me. He reproached me with that! God forgive him! You wait, I'll
						
						make it hot for Katerina at the trial! I'll just say a word then...
						
						I'll tell everything then!" And again she cried bitterly.
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p64">"This I can tell you for certain, Grushenka," Alyosha said,
						
						getting up. "First, that he loves you, loves you more than anyone in
						
						the world, and you only, believe me. I know. I do know. The second
						
						thing is that I don't want to worm his secret out of him, but if he'll
						
						tell me of himself to-day, I shall tell him straight out that I have
						
						promised to tell you. Then I'll come to you to-day and tell you.
						
						Only... I fancy... Katerina Ivanovna has nothing to do with it, and
						
						that the secret is about something else. That's certain. It isn't
						
						likely it's about Katerina Ivanovna, it seems to me. Good-bye for
						
						now."
						
							</p><p id="i_16-p65">Alyosha shook hands with her. Grushenka was still crying. He saw
						
						that she put little faith in his consolation, but she was better for
						
						having had her sorrow out, for having spoken of it. He was sorry to
						
						leave her in such a state of mind, but he was in haste. He had a great
						
						many things to do still.</p>
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - The Injured Foot" prev="i_16" next="iii_14" id="ii_15">
					
					
						   <p id="ii_15-p1">THE first of these things was at the house of Madame Hohlakov, and
						
						he hurried there to get it over as quickly as possible and not be
						
						too late for Mitya. Madame Hohlakov had been slightly ailing for the
						
						last three weeks: her foot had for some reason swollen up, and
						
						though she was not in bed, she lay all day half-reclining on the couch
						
						in her boudoir, in a fascinating but decorous deshabille. Alyosha
						
						had once noted with innocent amusement that, in spite of her
						
						illness, Madame Hohlakov had begun to be rather dressy- topknots,
						
						ribbons, loose wrappers had made their appearance, and he had an
						
						inkling of the reason, though he dismissed such ideas from his mind as
						
						frivolous. During the last two months the young official, Perhotin,
						
						had become a regular visitor at the house.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p2">Alyosha had not called for four days and he was in haste to go
						
						straight to Lise, as it was with her he had to speak, for Lise had
						
						sent a maid to him the previous day specially asking him to come to
						
						her "about something very important," a request which, for certain
						
						reasons, had interest for Alyosha. But while the maid went to take his
						
						name in to Lise, Madame Hohlakov heard of his arrival from someone,
						
						and immediately sent to beg him to come to her "just for one
						
						minute." Alyosha reflected that it was better to accede to the mamma's
						
						request, or else she would be sending down to Lise's room every minute
						
						that he was there. Madame Hohlakov was lying on a couch. She was
						
						particularly smartly dressed and was evidently in a state of extreme
						
						nervous excitement. She greeted Alyosha with cries of rapture.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p3">"It's ages, ages, perfect ages since I've seen you! It's a whole
						
						week- only think of it! Ah, but you were here only four days ago, on
						
						Wednesday. You have come to see Lise. I'm sure you meant to slip
						
						into her room on tiptoe, without my hearing you. My dear, dear
						
						Alexey Fyodorovitch, if you only knew how worried I am about her!
						
						But of that later, though that's the most important thing, of that
						
						later. Dear Alexey Fyodorovitch, I trust you implicitly with my
						
						Lise. Since the death of Father Zossima- God rest his soul!" (she
						
						crossed herself)- "I look upon you as a monk, though you look charming
						
						in your new suit. Where did you find such a tailor in these parts? No,
						
						no, that's not the chief thing- of that later. Forgive me for
						
						sometimes calling you Alyosha; an old woman like me may take
						
						liberties," she smiled coquettishly; "but that will do later, too. The
						
						important thing is that I shouldn't forget what is important. Please
						
						remind me of it yourself. As soon as my tongue runs away with me,
						
						you just say 'the important thing?' Ach! how do I know now what is
						
						of most importance? Ever since Lise took back her promise- her
						
						childish promise, Alexey Fyodorovitch- to marry you, you've
						
						realised, of course, that it was only the playful fancy of a sick
						
						child who had been so long confined to her chair- thank God, she can
						
						walk now!... that-new doctor Katya sent for from Moscow for your
						
						unhappy brother, who will to-morrow- but why speak of to-morrow? I
						
						am ready to die at the very thought of to-morrow. Ready to die of
						
						curiosity.... That doctor was with us yesterday and saw Lise.... I
						
						paid him fifty roubles for the visit. But that's not the point, that's
						
						not the point again. You see, I'm mixing everything up. I am in such a
						
						hurry. Why am I in a hurry? I don't understand. It's awful how I
						
						seem growing unable to understand anything. Everything seems mixed
						
						up in a sort of tangle. I am afraid you are so bored you will jump
						
						up and run away, and that will be all I shall see of you. Goodness!
						
						Why are we sitting here and no coffee? Yulia, Glafira, coffee!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p4">Alyosha made haste to thank her, and said that he had only just
						
						had coffee.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p5">"Where?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p6">"At Agrfena Alexandrovna's."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p7">"At... at that woman's? Ah, it's she has brought ruin on everyone.
						
						I know nothing about it though. They say she has become a saint,
						
						though it's rather late in the day. She had better have done it
						
						before. What use is it now? Hush, hush, Alexey Fyodorovitch, for I
						
						have so much to say to you that I am afraid I shall tell you
						
						nothing. This awful trial... I shall certainly go, I am making
						
						arrangements. I shall be carried there in my chair; besides I can
						
						sit up. I shall have people with me. And, you know, I am a witness.
						
						How shall I speak, how shall I speak? I don't know what I shall say.
						
						One has to take an oath, hasn't one?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p8">"Yes; but I don't think you will be able to go."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p9">"I can sit up. Ah, you put me out! Ah! this trial, this savage
						
						act, and then they are all going to Siberia, some are getting married,
						
						and all this so quickly, so quickly, everything's changing, and at
						
						last- nothing. All grow old and have death to look forward to. Well,
						
						so be it! I am weary. This Katya, cette charmante personne, has
						
						disappointed all my hopes. Now she is going to follow one of your
						
						brothers to Siberia, and your other brother is going to follow her,
						
						and will live in the nearest town, and they will all torment one
						
						another. It drives me out of my mind. Worst of all- the publicity. The
						
						story has been told a million times over in all the papers in Moscow
						
						and Petersburg. Ah! yes, would you believe it, there's a paragraph
						
						that I was 'a dear friend' of your brother's- , I can't repeat the
						
						horrid word. just fancy, just fancy!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p10">"Impossible! Where was the paragraph? What did it say?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p11">"I'll show you directly. I got the paper and read it yesterday.
						
						Here, in the Petersburg paper Gossip. The paper began coming out
						
						this year. I am awfully fond of gossip, and I take it in, and now it
						
						pays me out- this is what gossip comes to! Here it is, here, this
						
						passage. Read it."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p12">And she handed Alyosha a sheet of newspaper which had been under
						
						her pillow.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p13">It was not exactly that she was upset, she seemed overwhelmed
						
						and perhaps everything really was mixed up in a tangle in her head.
						
						The paragraph was very typical, and must have been a great shock to
						
						her, but, fortunately perhaps, she was unable to keep her mind fixed
						
						on any one subject at that moment, and so might race off in a minute
						
						to something else and quite forget the newspaper.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p14">Alyosha was well aware that the story of the terrible case had
						
						spread all over Russia. And, good heavens! what wild rumours about his
						
						brother, about the Karamazovs, and about himself he had read in the
						
						course of those two months, among other equally credible items! One
						
						paper had even stated that he had gone into a monastery and become a
						
						monk, in horror at his brother's crime. Another contradicted this, and
						
						stated that he and his elder, Father Zossima, had broken into the
						
						monastery chest and "made tracks from the monastery." The present
						
						paragraph in the paper Gossip was under the heading, "The Karamazov
						
						Case at Skotoprigonyevsk." (That, alas! was the name of our little
						
						town. I had hitherto kept it concealed.) It was brief, and Madame
						
						Hohlakov was not directly mentioned in it. No names appeared, in fact.
						
						It was merely stated that the criminal, whose approaching trial was
						
						making such a sensation- retired army captain, an idle swaggerer,
						
						and reactionary bully- was continually involved in amorous
						
						intrigues, and particularly popular with certain ladies "who were
						
						pining in solitude." One such lady, a pining widow, who tried to
						
						seem young though she had a grown-up daughter, was so fascinated by
						
						him that only two hours before the crime she offered him three
						
						thousand roubles, on condition that he would elope with her to the
						
						gold mines. But the criminal, counting on escaping punishment, had
						
						preferred to murder his father to get the three thousand rather than
						
						go off to Siberia with the middle-aged charms of his pining lady. This
						
						playful paragraph finished, of course, with an outburst of generous
						
						indignation at the wickedness of parricide and at the lately abolished
						
						institution of serfdom. Reading it with curiosity, Alyosha folded up
						
						the paper and handed it back to Madame Hohlakov.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p15">"Well, that must be me," she hurried on again. "Of course I am
						
						meant. Scarcely more than an hour before, I suggested gold mines to
						
						him, and here they talk of 'middle-aged charms' as though that were my
						
						motive! He writes that out of spite! God Almighty forgive him for
						
						the middle-aged charms, as I forgive him! You know it's -Do you know
						
						who it is? It's your friend Rakitin."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p16">"Perhaps," said Alyosha, "though I've heard nothing about it."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p17">"It's he, it's he! No 'perhaps' about it. You know I turned him
						
						out of the house.... You know all that story, don't you?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p18">"I know that you asked him not to visit you for the future, but
						
						why it was, I haven't heard... from you, at least."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p19">"Ah, then you've heard it from him! He abuses me, I suppose,
						
						abuses me dreadfully?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p20">"Yes, he does; but then he abuses everyone. But why you've given
						
						him up I, haven't heard from him either. I meet him very seldom now,
						
						indeed. We are not friends."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p21">"Well, then, I'll tell you all about it. There's no help for it,
						
						I'll confess, for there is one point in which I was perhaps to
						
						blame. Only a little, little point, so little that perhaps it
						
						doesn't count. You see, my dear boy"- Madame Hohlakov suddenly
						
						looked arch and a charming, though enigmatic, smile played about her
						
						lips- "you see, I suspect... You must forgive me, Alyosha. I am like a
						
						mother to you... No, no; quite the contrary. I speak to you now as
						
						though you were my father- mother's quite out of place. Well, it's
						
						as though I were confessing to Father Zossima, that's just it. I
						
						called you a monk just now. Well, that poor young man, your friend,
						
						Rakitin (Mercy on us! I can't be angry with him. I feel cross, but not
						
						very), that frivolous young man, would you believe it, seems to have
						
						taken it into his head to fall in love with me. I only noticed it
						
						later. At first- a month ago- he only began to come oftener to see me,
						
						almost every day; though, of course, we were acquainted before. I knew
						
						nothing about it... and suddenly it dawned upon me, and I began to
						
						notice things with surprise. You know, two months ago, that modest,
						
						charming, excellent young man, Ilyitch Perhotin, who's in the
						
						service here, began to be a regular visitor at the house. You met
						
						him here ever so many times yourself. And he is an excellent,
						
						earnest young man, isn't he? He comes once every three days, not every
						
						day (though I should be glad to see him every day), and always so well
						
						dressed. Altogether, I love young people, Alyosha, talented, modest,
						
						like you, and he has almost the mind of a statesman, he talks so
						
						charmingly, and I shall certainly, certainly try and get promotion for
						
						him. He is a future diplomat. On that awful day he almost saved me
						
						from death by coming in the night. And your friend Rakitin comes in
						
						such boots, and always stretches them out on the carpet.... He began
						
						hinting at his feelings, in fact, and one day, as he was going, he
						
						squeezed my hand terribly hard. My foot began to swell directly
						
						after he pressed my hand like that. He had met Pyotr Ilyitch here
						
						before, and would you believe it, he is always gibing at him, growling
						
						at him, for some reason. I simply looked at the way they went on
						
						together and laughed inwardly. So I was sitting here alone- no, I
						
						was laid up then. Well, I was lying here alone and suddenly Rakitin
						
						comes in, and only fancy! brought me some verses of his own
						
						composition- a short poem, on my bad foot: that is, he described my
						
						foot in a poem. Wait a minute- how did it go?
						
						
						
						</p><p id="ii_15-p22" /><p id="ii_15-p23">                     A captivating little foot.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p24" /><p id="ii_15-p25">It began somehow like that. I can never remember poetry. I've
						
						got it here. I'll show it to you later. But it's a charming thing-
						
						charming; and, you know, it's not only about the foot, it had a good
						
						moral, too, a charming idea, only I've forgotten it; in fact, it was
						
						just the thing for an album. So, of course, I thanked him, and he
						
						was evidently flattered. I'd hardly had time to thank him when in
						
						comes Pyotr Ilyitch, and Rakitin suddenly looked as black as night.
						
						I could see that Pyotr Ilyitch was in the way, for Rakitin certainly
						
						wanted to say something after giving me the verses. I had a
						
						presentiment of it; but Pyotr Ilyitch came in. I showed Pyotr
						
						Ilyitch the verses and didn't say who was the author. But I am
						
						convinced that he guessed, though he won't own it to this day, and
						
						declares he had no idea. But he says that on purpose. Pyotr Ilyitch
						
						began to laugh at once, and fell to criticising it. 'Wretched
						
						doggerel,' he said they were, 'some divinity student must have written
						
						them,' and with such vehemence, such vehemence! Then, instead of
						
						laughing, your friend flew into a rage. 'Good gracious!' I thought,
						
						'they'll fly at each other.' 'It was I who wrote them,' said he. 'I
						
						wrote them as a joke,' he said, 'for I think it degrading to write
						
						verses.... But they are good poetry. They want to put a monument to
						
						your Pushkin for writing about women's feet, while I wrote with a
						
						moral purpose, and you,' said he, 'are an advocate of serfdom.
						
						You've no humane ideas,' said he. 'You have no modern enlightened
						
						feelings, you are uninfluenced by progress, you are a mere
						
						official,' he said, 'and you take bribes.' Then I began screaming
						
						and imploring them. And, you know, Pyotr Ilyitch is anything but a
						
						coward. He at once took up the most gentlemanly tone, looked at him
						
						sarcastically, listened, and apologised. 'I'd no idea,' said he. 'I
						
						shouldn't have said it, if I had known. I should have praised it.
						
						Poets are all so irritable,' he said. In short, he laughed at him
						
						under cover of the most gentlemanly tone. He explained to me
						
						afterwards that it was all sarcastic. I thought he was in earnest.
						
						Only as I lay there, just as before you now, I thought, 'Would it,
						
						or would it not, be the proper thing for me to turn Rakitin out for
						
						shouting so rudely at a visitor in my house?' And, would you believe
						
						it, I lay here, shut my eyes, and wondered, would it be the proper
						
						thing or not. I kept worrying and worrying, and my heart began to
						
						beat, and I couldn't make up my mind whether to make an outcry or not.
						
						One voice seemed to be telling me, 'Speak,' and the other 'No, don't
						
						speak.' And no sooner had the second voice said that than I cried out,
						
						and fainted. Of course, there was a fuss. I got up suddenly and said
						
						to Rakitin, 'It's painful for me to say it, but I don't wish to see
						
						you in my house again.' So I turned him out. Ah! Alexey
						
						Fyodorovitch, I know myself I did wrong. I was putting it on. I wasn't
						
						angry with him at all, really; but I suddenly fancied- that was what
						
						did it- that it would be such a fine scene.... And yet, believe me, it
						
						was quite natural, for I really shed tears and cried for several
						
						days afterwards, and then suddenly, one afternoon, I forgot all
						
						about it. So it's a fortnight since he's been here, and I kept
						
						wondering whether he would come again. I wondered even yesterday, then
						
						suddenly last night came this Gossip. I read it and gasped. Who
						
						could have written it? He must have written it. He went home, sat
						
						down, wrote it on the spot, sent it, and they put it in. It was a
						
						fortnight ago, you see. But, Alyosha, it's awful how I keep talking
						
						and don't say what I want to say. the words come of themselves!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p26">"It's very important for me to be in time to see my brother
						
						to-day," Alyosha faltered.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p27">"To be sure, to be sure! You bring it all back to me. Listen, what
						
						is an aberration?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p28">"What aberration?" asked Alyosha, wondering.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p29">"In the legal sense. An aberration in which everything is
						
						pardonable. Whatever you do, you will be acquitted at once."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p30">"What do you mean?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p31">"I'll tell you. This Katya... Ah! she is a charming, charming
						
						creature, only I never can make out who it is she is in love with. She
						
						was with me some time ago and I couldn't get anything out of her.
						
						Especially as she won't talk to me except on the surface now. She is
						
						always talking about my health and nothing else, and she takes up such
						
						a tone with me, too. I simply said to myself, 'Well so be it. I
						
						don't care'...Oh, yes. I was talking of aberration. This doctor has
						
						come. You know a doctor has come? Of course, you know it- the one
						
						who discovers madmen. You wrote for him. No, it wasn't you, but Katya.
						
						It's all Katya's doing. Well, you see, a man may be sitting
						
						perfectly sane and suddenly have an aberration. He may be conscious
						
						and know what he is doing and yet be in a state of aberration. And
						
						there's no doubt that Dmitri Fyodorovitch was suffering from
						
						aberration. They found out about aberration as soon as the law
						
						courts were reformed. It's all the good effect of the reformed law
						
						courts. The doctor has been here and questioned me about that evening,
						
						about the gold mines. 'How did he seem then?' he asked me. He must
						
						have been in a state of aberration. He came in shouting, 'Money,
						
						money, three thousand! Give me three thousand!' and then went away and
						
						immediately did the murder. 'I don't want to murder him,' he said, and
						
						he suddenly went and murdered him. That's why they'll acquit him,
						
						because he struggled against it and yet he murdered him."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p32">"But he didn't murder him," Alyosha interrupted rather sharply. He
						
						felt more and more sick with anxiety and impatience.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p33">"Yes, I know it was that old man Grigory murdered him."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p34">"Grigory?" cried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p35">"Yes, yes; it was Grigory. He lay as Dmitri Fyodorovitch struck
						
						him down, and then got up, saw the door open, went in and killed
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p36">"But why, why?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p37">"Suffering from aberration. When he recovered from the blow Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch gave him on the head, he was suffering from aberration:
						
						he went and committed the murder. As for his saying he didn't, he very
						
						likely doesn't remember. Only, you know, it'll be better, ever so much
						
						better, if Dmitri Fyodorovitch murdered him. And that's how it must
						
						have been, though I say it was Grigory. It certainly was Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch, and that's better, ever so much better! Oh! not better
						
						that a son should have killed his father, I don't defend that.
						
						Children ought to honour their parents, and yet it would be better
						
						if it were he, as you'd have nothing to cry over then, for he did it
						
						when he was unconscious or rather when he was conscious, but did not
						
						know what he was doing. Let them acquit him- that's so humane, and
						
						would show what a blessing reformed law courts are. I knew nothing
						
						about it, but they say they have been so a long time. And when I heard
						
						it yesterday, I was so struck by it that I wanted to send for you at
						
						once. And if he is acquitted, make him come straight from the law
						
						courts to dinner with me, and I'll have a party of friends, and
						
						we'll drink to the reformed law courts. I don't believe he'd be
						
						dangerous; besides, I'll invite a great many friends, so that he could
						
						always be led out if he did anything. And then he might be made a
						
						justice of the peace or something in another town, for those who
						
						have been in trouble themselves make the best judges. And, besides,
						
						who isn't suffering from aberration nowadays?- you, I, all of us,
						
						are in a state of aberration, and there are ever so many examples of
						
						it: a man sits singing a song, suddenly something annoys him, he takes
						
						a pistol and shoots the first person he comes across, and no one
						
						blames him for it. I read that lately, and all the doctors confirm it.
						
						The doctors are always confirming; they confirm,- anything. Why, my
						
						Lise is in a state of aberration. She made me cry again yesterday, and
						
						the day before, too, and to-day I suddenly realised that it's all
						
						due to aberration. Oh, Lise grieves me so! I believe she's quite
						
						mad. Why did she send for you? Did she send for you or did you come of
						
						yourself?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p38">"Yes, she sent for me, and I am just going to her." Alyosha got up
						
						resolutely.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p39">"Oh, my dear, dear Alexey Fyodorovitch, perhaps that's what's most
						
						important," Madame Hohlakov cried, suddenly bursting into tears.
						
						"God knows I trust Lise to you with all my heart, and it's no matter
						
						her sending for you on the sly, without telling her mother. But
						
						forgive me, I can't trust my daughter so easily to your brother Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch, though I still consider him the most chivalrous young
						
						man. But only fancy, he's been to see Lise and I knew nothing about
						
						it!"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p40">"How? What? When?" Alyosha was exceedingly surprised. He had not
						
						sat down again and listened standing.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p41">"I will tell you; that's perhaps why I asked you to come, for I
						
						don't know now why I did ask you to come. Well, Ivan Fyodorovitch
						
						has been to see me twice, since he came back from Moscow. First time
						
						he came as a friend to call on me, and the second time Katya was
						
						here and he came because he heard she was here. I didn't, of course,
						
						expect him to come often, knowing what a lot he has to do as it is,
						
						vous comprenez, cette affaire et la mort terrible de votre papa.
						
						(You know, this affair and your father's terrible death.) But I
						
						suddenly heard he'd been here again, not to see me but to see Lise.
						
						That's six days ago now. He came, stayed five minutes, and went
						
						away. And I didn't hear of it till three days afterwards, from
						
						Glafira, so it was a great shock to me. I sent for Lise directly.
						
						She laughed. 'He thought you were asleep,' she said, 'and came in to
						
						me to ask after your health.' Of course, that's how it happened. But
						
						Lise, Lise, mercy on us, how she distresses me! Would you believe
						
						it, one night, four days ago, just after you saw her last time, and
						
						had gone away, she suddenly had a fit, screaming, shrieking,
						
						hysterics! Why is it I never have hysterics? Then, next day another
						
						fit, and the same thing on the third, and yesterday too, and then
						
						yesterday that aberration. She suddenly screamed out, 'I hate Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch. I insist on your never letting him come to the house
						
						again.' I was struck dumb at these amazing words, and answered, 'On
						
						what grounds could I refuse to see such an excellent young man, a
						
						young man of such learning too, and so unfortunate?'- for all this
						
						business is a misfortune, isn't it?' She suddenly burst out laughing
						
						at my words, and so rudely, you know. Well, I was pleased; I thought I
						
						had amused her and the fits would pass off, especially as I wanted
						
						to refuse to see Ivan Fyodorovitch anyway on account of his strange
						
						visits without my knowledge, and meant to ask him for an
						
						explanation. But early this morning Lise waked up and flew into a
						
						passion with Yulia and, would you believe it, slapped her in the face.
						
						That's monstrous; I am always polite to my servants. And an hour later
						
						she was hugging Yulia's feet and kissing them. She sent a message to
						
						me that she wasn't coming to me at all, and would never come and see
						
						me again, and when I dragged myself down to her, she rushed to kiss
						
						me, crying, and as she kissed me, she pushed me out of the room
						
						without saying a word, so I couldn't find out what was the matter.
						
						Now, dear Alexey Fyodorovitch, I rest all my hopes on you, and, of
						
						course, my whole life is in your hands. I simply beg you to go to Lise
						
						and find out everything from her, as you alone can, and come back
						
						and tell me- me, her mother, for you understand it will be the death
						
						of me, simply the death of me, if this goes on, or else I shall run
						
						away. I can stand no more. I have patience; but I may lose patience,
						
						and then... then something awful will happen. Ah, dear me! At last,
						
						Pyotr Ilyitch!" cried Madame Hohlakov, beaming all over as she saw
						
						Perhotin enter the room. "You are late, you are late! Well, sit
						
						down, speak, put us out of suspense. What does the counsel say.
						
						Where are you off to, Alexey Fyodorovitch?"
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p42">"To Lise."
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p43">"Oh, yes. You won't forget, you won't forget what I asked you?
						
						It's a question of life and death!
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p44">"Of course, I won't forget, if I can... but I am so late,"
						
						muttered Alyosha, beating a hasty retreat.
						
							</p><p id="ii_15-p45">"No, be sure, be sure to come in; don't say 'If you can.' I
						
						shall die if you don't," Madame Hohlakov called after him, but Alyosha
						
						had already left the room.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - A Little Demon" prev="ii_15" next="iv_10" id="iii_14">
						<p id="iii_14-p1">GOING in to Lise, he found her half reclining in the
						
						invalid-chair, in which she had been wheeled when she was unable to
						
						walk. She did not move to meet him, but her sharp, keen eyes were
						
						simply riveted on his face. There was a feverish look in her eyes, her
						
						face was pale and yellow. Alyosha was amazed at the change that had
						
						taken place in her in three days. She was positively thinner. She
						
						did not hold out her hand to him. He touched the thin, long fingers
						
						which lay motionless on her dress, then he sat down facing her,
						
						without a word.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p2">"I know you are in a hurry to get to the prison," Lise said
						
						curtly, "and mamma's kept you there for hours; she's just been telling
						
						you about me and Yulia."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p3">"How do you know?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p4">"I've been listening. Why do you stare at me? I want to listen and
						
						I do listen, there's no harm in that. I don't apologise."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p5">"You are upset about something?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p6">"On the contrary, I am very happy. I've only just been
						
						reflecting for the thirtieth time what a good thing it is I refused
						
						you and shall not be your wife. You are not fit to be a husband. If
						
						I were to marry you and give you a note to take to the man I loved
						
						after you, you'd take it and be sure to give it to him and bring an
						
						answer back, too. If you were forty, you would still go on taking my
						
						love-letters for me."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p7">She suddenly laughed.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p8">"There is something spiteful and yet open-hearted about you,"
						
						Alyosha smiled to her.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p9">"The open-heartedness consists in my not being ashamed of myself
						
						with you. What's more, I don't want to feel ashamed with you, just
						
						with you. Alyosha, why is it I don't respect you? I am very fond of
						
						you, but I don't respect you. If I respected you, I shouldn't talk
						
						to you without shame, should I?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p10">"No."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p11">"But do you believe that I am not ashamed with you?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p12">"No, I don't believe it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p13">Lise laughed nervously again; she spoke rapidly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p14">"I sent your brother, Dmitri Fyodorovitch, some sweets in
						
						prison. Alyosha, you know, you are quite pretty! I shall love you
						
						awfully for having so quickly allowed me not to love you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p15">"Why did you send for me to-day, Lise?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p16">"I wanted to tell you of a longing I have. I should like some
						
						one to torture me, marry me and then torture me, deceive me and go
						
						away. I don't want to be happy."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p17">"You are in love with disorder?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p18">"Yes, I want disorder. I keep wanting to set fire to the house.
						
						I keep imagining how I'll creep up and set fire to the house on the
						
						sly; it must be on the sly. They'll try to put it out, but it'll go on
						
						burning. And I shall know and say nothing. Ah, what silliness! And how
						
						bored I am!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p19">She waved her hand with a look of repulsion.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p20">"It's your luxurious life," said Alyosha, softly"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p21">"Is it better, then, to be poor?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p22">"Yes, it is better."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p23">"That's what your monk taught you. That's not true. Let me be rich
						
						and all the rest poor, I'll eat sweets and drink cream and not give
						
						any to anyone else. Ach, don't speak, don't say anything"; she shook
						
						her hand at him, though Alyosha had not opened his mouth. "You've told
						
						me all that before, I know it all by heart. It bores me. If I am
						
						ever poor, I shall murder somebody, and even if I am rich, I may
						
						murder someone, perhaps- why do nothing! But do you know, I should
						
						like to reap, cut the rye? I'll marry you, and you shall become a
						
						peasant, a real peasant; we'll keep a colt, shall we? Do you know
						
						Kalganov?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p24">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p25">"He is always wandering about, dreaming. He says, 'Why live in
						
						real life? It's better to dream. One can dream the most delightful
						
						things, but real life is a bore.' But he'll be married soon for all
						
						that; he's been making love to me already. Can you spin tops?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p26">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p27">"Well, he's just like a top: he wants to be wound up and set
						
						spinning and then to be lashed, lashed, lashed with a whip. If I marry
						
						him, I'll keep him spinning all his life. You are not ashamed to be
						
						with me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p28">"No."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p29">"You are awfully cross, because I don't talk about holy things.
						
						I don't want to be holy. What will they do to one in the next world
						
						for the greatest sin? You must know all about that."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p30">"God will censure you." Alyosha was watching her steadily.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p31">"That's just what I should like. I would go up and they would
						
						censure me, and I would burst out laughing in their faces. I should
						
						dreadfully like to set fire to the house, Alyosha, to our house; you
						
						still don't believe me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p32">"Why? There are children of twelve years old, who have a longing
						
						to set fire to something and they do set things on fire, too. It's a
						
						sort of disease."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p33">"That's not true, that's not true; there may be children, but
						
						that's not what I mean."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p34">"You take evil for good; it's a passing crisis; it's the result of
						
						your illness, perhaps."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p35">"You do despise me, though! It's simply that I don't want to do
						
						good, I want to do evil, and it has nothing to do with illness."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p36">"Why do evil?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p37">"So that everything might be destroyed. Ah, how nice it would be
						
						if everything were destroyed! You know, Alyosha, I sometimes think
						
						of doing a fearful lot of harm and everything bad, and I should do
						
						it for a long while on the sly and suddenly everyone would find it
						
						out. Everyone will stand round and point their fingers at me and I
						
						would look at them all. That would be awfully nice. Why would it be so
						
						nice, Alyosha?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p38">"I don't know. It's a craving to destroy something good or, as you
						
						say, to set fire to something. It happens sometimes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p39">"I not only say it, I shall do it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p40">"I believe you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p41">"Ah, how I love you for saying you believe me. And you are not
						
						lying one little bit. But perhaps you think that I am saying all
						
						this on purpose to annoy you?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p42">"No, I don't think that... though perhaps there is a little desire
						
						to do that in it, too."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p43">"There is a little. I never can tell lies to you," she declared,
						
						with a strange fire in her eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p44">What struck Alyosha above everything was her earnestness. There
						
						was not a trace of humour or jesting in her face now, though, in old
						
						days, fun and gaiety never deserted her even at her most "earnest"
						
						moments.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p45">"There are moments when people love crime," said Alyosha
						
						thoughtfully.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p46">"Yes, yes! You have uttered my thought; they love crime,
						
						everyone loves crime, they love it always, not at some 'moments.'
						
						You know, it's as though people have made an agreement to lie about it
						
						and have lied about it ever since. They all declare that they hate
						
						evil, but secretly they all love it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p47">"And are you still reading nasty books?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p48">"Yes, I am. Mamma reads them and hides them under her pillow and I
						
						steal them."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p49">"Aren't you ashamed to destroy yourself?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p50">"I want to destroy myself. There's a boy here, who lay down
						
						between the railway lines when the train was passing. Lucky fellow!
						
						Listen, your brother is being tried now for murdering his father and
						
						everyone loves his having killed his father."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p51">"Loves his having killed his father?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p52">"Yes, loves it; everyone loves it! Everybody says it's so awful,
						
						but secretly they simply love it. I for one love it."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p53">"There is some truth in what you say about everyone," said Alyosha
						
						softly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p54">"Oh, what ideas you have!" Lise shrieked in delight. "And you a
						
						monk, too! You wouldn't believe how I respect you, Alyosha, for
						
						never telling lies. Oh, I must tell you a funny dream of mine. I
						
						sometimes dream of devils. It's night; I am in my room with a candle
						
						and suddenly there are devils all over the place, in all the
						
						corners, under the table, and they open the doors; there's a crowd
						
						of them behind the doors and they want to come and seize me. And
						
						they are just coming, just seizing me. But I suddenly cross myself and
						
						they all draw back, though they don't go away altogether, they stand
						
						at the doors and in the corners, waiting. And suddenly I have a
						
						frightful longing to revile God aloud, and so I begin, and then they
						
						come crowding back to me, delighted, and seize me again and I cross
						
						myself again and they all draw back. It's awful fun, it takes one's
						
						breath away."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p55">"I've had the same dream, too," said Alyosha suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p56">"Really?" cried Lise, surprised. "I say, Alyosha, don't laugh,
						
						that's awfully important. Could two different people have the same
						
						dream?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p57">"It seems they can."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p58">"Alyosha, I tell you, it's awfully important," Lise went on,
						
						with really excessive amazement. "It's not the dream that's important,
						
						but your having the same dream as me. You never lie to me, don't lie
						
						now; is it true? You are not laughing?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p59">"It's true."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p60">Lise seemed extraordinarily impressed and for half a minute she
						
						was silent.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p61">"Alyosha, come and see me, come and see me more often," she said
						
						suddenly, in a supplicating voice.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p62">"I'll always come to see you, all my life," answered Alyosha
						
						firmly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p63">"You are the only person I can talk to, you know," Lise began
						
						again. "I talk to no one but myself and you. Only you in the whole
						
						world. And to you more readily than to myself. And I am not a bit
						
						ashamed with you, not a bit. Alyosha, why am I not ashamed with you,
						
						not a bit? Alyosha, is it true that at Easter the Jews steal a child
						
						and kill it?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p64">"I don't know."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p65">"There's a book here in which I read about the trial of a Jew, who
						
						took a child of four years old and cut off the fingers from both
						
						hands, and then crucified him on the wall, hammered nails into him and
						
						crucified him, and afterwards, when he was tried, he said that the
						
						child died soon, within four hours. That was 'soon'! He said the child
						
						moaned, kept on moaning and he stood admiring it. That's nice!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p66">"Nice?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p67">"Nice; I sometimes imagine that it was I who crucified him. He
						
						would hang there moaning and I would sit opposite him eating pineapple
						
						compote. I am awfully fond of pineapple compote. Do you like it?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p68">Alyosha looked at her in silence. Her pale, sallow face was
						
						suddenly contorted, her eyes burned.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p69">"You know, when I read about that Jew I shook with sobs all night.
						
						I kept fancying how the little thing cried and moaned (a child of four
						
						years old understands, you know), and all the while the thought of
						
						pineapple compote haunted me. In the morning I wrote a letter to a
						
						certain person, begging him particularly to come and see me. He came
						
						and I suddenly told him all about the child and the pineapple compote.
						
						All about it, all, and said that it was nice. He laughed and said it
						
						really was nice. Then he got up and went away. He was only here five
						
						minutes. Did he despise me? Did he despise me? Tell me, tell me,
						
						Alyosha, did he despise me or not?" She sat up on the couch, with
						
						flashing eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p70">"Tell me," Alyosha asked anxiously, "did you send for that
						
						person?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p71">"Yes, I did."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p72">"Did you send him a letter?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p73">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p74">"Simply to ask about that, about that child?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p75">"No, not about that at all. But when he came, I asked him about
						
						that at once. He answered, laughed, got up and went away."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p76">"That person behaved honourably," Alyosha murmured.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p77">"And did he despise me? Did he laugh at me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p78">"No, for perhaps he believes in the pineapple compote himself.
						
						He is very ill now, too, Lise."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p79">"Yes, he does believe in it," said Lise, with flashing eyes.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p80">"He doesn't despise anyone," Alyosha went on. "Only he does not
						
						believe anyone. If he doesn't believe in people, of course, he does
						
						despise them."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p81">"Then he despises me, me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p82">"You, too."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p83">"Good." Lise seemed to grind her teeth. "When he went out
						
						laughing, I felt that it was nice to be despised. The child with
						
						fingers cut off is nice, and to be despised is nice..."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p84">And she laughed in Alyosha's face, a feverish malicious laugh.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p85">"Do you know, Alyosha, do you know, I should like- Alyosha, save
						
						me!" She suddenly jumped from the couch, rushed to him and seized
						
						him with both hands. "Save me!" she almost groaned. "Is there anyone
						
						in the world I could tell what I've told you? I've told you the truth,
						
						the truth. I shall kill myself, because I loathe everything! I don't
						
						want to live, because I loathe everything! I loathe everything,
						
						everything. Alyosha, why don't you love me in the least?" she finished
						
						in a frenzy.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p86">"But I do love you!" answered Alyosha warmly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p87">"And will you weep over me, will you?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p88">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p89">"Not because I won't be your wife, but simply weep for me?"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p90">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p91">"Thank you! It's only your tears I want. Everyone else may
						
						punish me and trample me under foot, everyone, everyone, not excepting
						
						anyone. For I don't love anyone. Do you hear, not anyone! On the
						
						contrary, I hate him! Go, Alyosha; it's time you went to your
						
						brother"; she tore herself away from him suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p92">"How can I leave you like this?" said Alyosha, almost in alarm.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p93">"Go to your brother, the prison will be shut; go, here's your hat.
						
						Give my love to Mitya, go, go!"
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p94">And she almost forcibly pushed Alyosha out of the door. He
						
						looked at her with pained surprise, when he was suddenly aware of a
						
						letter in his right hand, a tiny letter folded up tight and sealed. He
						
						glanced at it and instantly read the address, "To Ivan Fyodorovitch
						
						Karamazov." He looked quickly at Lise. Her face had become almost
						
						menacing.
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p95">"Give it to him, you must give it to him!" she ordered him,
						
						trembling and beside herself. "To-day, at once, or I'll poison myself!
						
						That's why I sent for you."
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p96">And she slammed the door quickly. The bolt clicked. Alyosha put
						
						the note in his pocket and went straight downstairs, without going
						
						back to Madame Hohlakov; forgetting her, in fact. As soon as Alyosha
						
						had gone, Lise unbolted the door, opened it a little, put her finger
						
						in the crack and slammed the door with all her might, pinching her
						
						finger. Ten seconds after, releasing her finger, she walked softly,
						
						slowly to her chair, sat up straight in it and looked intently at
						
						her blackened finger and at the blood that oozed from under the
						
						nail. Her lips were quivering and she kept whispering rapidly to
						
						herself:
						
							</p><p id="iii_14-p97">"I am a wretch, wretch, wretch, wretch!"</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - A Hymn and a Secret" prev="iii_14" next="v_8" id="iv_10">
					
					
							<p id="iv_10-p1">IT was quite late (days are short in November) when Alyosha rang
						
						at the prison gate. It was beginning to get dusk. But Alyosha knew
						
						that he would be admitted without difficulty. Things were managed in
						
						our little town, as everywhere else. At first, of course, on the
						
						conclusion of the preliminary inquiry, relations and a few other
						
						persons could only obtain interviews with Mitya by going through
						
						certain inevitable formalities. But later, though the formalities were
						
						not relaxed, exceptions were made for some, at least, of Mitya's
						
						visitors. So much so, that sometimes the interviews with the
						
						prisoner in the room set aside for the purpose were practically
						
						tete-a-tete.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p2">These exceptions, however, were few in number; only Grushenka,
						
						Alyosha and Rakitin were treated like this. But the captain of the
						
						police, Mihail Mihailovitch, was very favourably disposed to
						
						Grushenka. His abuse of her at Mokroe weighed on the old man's
						
						conscience, and when he learned the whole story, he completely changed
						
						his view of her. And strange to say, though he was firmly persuaded of
						
						his guilt, yet after Mitya was once in prison, the old man came to
						
						take a more and more lenient view of him. "He was a man of good heart,
						
						perhaps," he thought, "who had come to grief from drinking and
						
						dissipation." His first horror had been succeeded by pity. As for
						
						Alyosha, the police captain was very fond of him and had known him for
						
						a long time. Rakitin, who had of late taken to coming very often to
						
						see the prisoner, was one of the most intimate acquaintances of the
						
						"police captain's young ladies," as he called them, and was always
						
						hanging about their house. He gave lessons in the house of the
						
						prison superintendent, too, who, though scrupulous in the
						
						performance of his duties, was a kindhearted old man. Alyosha,
						
						again, had an intimate acquaintance of long standing with the
						
						superintendent, who was fond of talking to him, generally on sacred
						
						subjects. He respected Ivan Fyodorovitch, and stood in awe of his
						
						opinion, though he was a great philosopher himself; "self-taught,"
						
						of course. But Alyosha had an irresistible attraction for him.
						
						During the last year the old man had taken to studying the
						
						Apocryphal Gospels, and constantly talked over his impressions with
						
						his young friend. He used to come and see him in the monastery and
						
						discussed for hours together with him and with the monks. So even if
						
						Alyosha were late at the prison, he had only to go to the
						
						superintendent and everything was made easy. Besides, everyone in
						
						the prison, down to the humblest warder, had grown used to Alyosha.
						
						The sentry, of course, did not trouble him so long as the
						
						authorities were satisfied.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p3">When Mitya was summoned from his cell, he always went
						
						downstairs, to the place set aside for interviews. As Alyosha
						
						entered the room he came upon Rakitin, who was just taking leave of
						
						Mitya. They were both talking loudly. Mitya was laughing heartily as
						
						he saw him out, while Rakitin seemed grumbling. Rakitin did not like
						
						meeting Alyosha, especially of late. He scarcely spoke to him, and
						
						bowed to him stiffly. Seeing Alyosha enter now, he frowned and
						
						looked away, as though he were entirely absorbed in buttoning his big,
						
						warm, fur-trimmed overcoat. Then he began looking at once for his
						
						umbrella.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p4">"I must mind not to forget my belongings," he muttered, simply
						
						to say something.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p5">"Mind you don't forget other people's belongings," said Mitya,
						
						as a joke, and laughed at once at his own wit. Rakitin fired up
						
						instantly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p6">"You'd better give that advice to your own family, who've always
						
						been a slave-driving lot, and not to Rakitin," he cried, suddenly
						
						trembling with anger.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p7">"What's the matter? I was joking," cried Mitya. "Damn it all! They
						
						are all like that." He turned to Alyosha, nodding towards Rakitin's
						
						hurriedly retreating figure. "He was sitting here, laughing and
						
						cheerful, and all at once he boils up like that. He didn't even nod to
						
						you. Have you broken with him completely? Why are you so late? I've
						
						not been simply waiting, but thirsting for you the whole morning.
						
						But never mind. We'll make up for it now."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p8">"Why does he come here so often? Surely you are not such great
						
						friends?" asked Alyosha. He, too, nodded at the door through which
						
						Rakitin had disappeared.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p9">"Great friends with Rakitin? No, not as much as that. Is it
						
						likely- a pig like that? He considers I am... a blackguard. They can't
						
						understand a joke either, that's the worst of such people. They
						
						never understand a joke, and their souls are dry, dry and flat; they
						
						remind me of prison walls when I was first brought here. But he is a
						
						clever fellow, very clever. Well, Alexey, it's all over with me now."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p10">He sat down on the bench and made Alyosha sit down beside him.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p11">"Yes, the trial's to-morrow. Are you so hopeless, brother?"
						
						Alyosha said, with an apprehensive feeling.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p12">"What are you talking about?" said Mitya, looking at him rather
						
						uncertainly. "Oh, you mean the trial! Damn it all! Till now we've been
						
						talking of things that don't matter, about this trial, but I haven't
						
						said a word to you about the chief thing. Yes, the trial is to-morrow;
						
						but it wasn't the trial I meant, when I said it was all over with
						
						me. Why do you look at me so critically?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p13">"What do you mean, Mitya?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p14">"Ideas, ideas, that's all! Ethics! What is ethics?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p15">"Ethics?" asked Alyosha, wondering.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p16">"Yes; is it a science?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p17">"Yes, there is such a science... but... I confess I can't
						
						explain to you what sort of science it is."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p18">"Rakitin knows. Rakitin knows a lot, damn him! He's not going to
						
						be a monk. He means to go to Petersburg. There he'll go in for
						
						criticism of an elevating tendency. Who knows, he may be of use and
						
						make his own career, too. Ough! they are first-rate, these people,
						
						at making a career! Damn ethics, I am done for, Alexey, I am, you
						
						man of God! I love you more than anyone. It makes my heart yearn to
						
						look at you. Who was Karl Bernard?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p19">"Karl Bernard?" Alyosha was surprised again.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p20">"No, not Karl. Stay, I made a mistake. Claude Bernard. What was
						
						he? Chemist or what?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p21">"He must be a savant," answered Alyosha; "but I confess I can't
						
						tell you much about him, either. I've heard of him as a savant, but
						
						what sort I don't know."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p22">"Well, damn him, then! I don't know either," swore Mitya. "A
						
						scoundrel of some sort, most likely. They are all scoundrels. And
						
						Rakitin will make his way. Rakitin will get on anywhere; he is another
						
						Bernard. Ugh, these Bernards! They are all over the place."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p23">"But what is the matter?" Alyosha asked insistently.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p24">"He wants to write an article about me, about my case, and so
						
						begin his literary career. That's what he comes for; he said so
						
						himself. He wants to prove some theory. He wants to say 'he couldn't
						
						help murdering his father, he was corrupted by his environment,' and
						
						so on. He explained it all to me. He is going to put in a tinge of
						
						Socialism, he says. But there, damn the fellow, he can put in a
						
						tinge if he likes, I don't care. He can't bear Ivan, he hates him.
						
						He's not fond of you, either. But I don't turn him out, for he is a
						
						clever fellow. Awfully conceited, though. I said to him just now,' The
						
						Karamazovs are not blackguards, but philosophers; for all true
						
						Russians are philosophers, and though you've studied, you are not a
						
						philosopher- you are a low fellow.' He laughed, so maliciously. And
						
						I said to him, 'De ideabus non est disputandum.'* Isn't that rather
						
						good? I can set up for being a classic, you see!" Mitya laughed
						
						suddenly.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p25" /><p id="iv_10-p26">* There's no disputing ideas.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p27" /><p id="iv_10-p28">"Why is it all over with you? You said so just now," Alyosha
						
						interposed.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p29">"Why is it all over with me? H'm!... The fact of it is... if you
						
						take it as a whole, I am sorry to lose God- that's why it is."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p30">"What do you mean by 'sorry to lose God'?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p31">"Imagine: inside, in the nerves, in the head- that is, these
						
						nerves are there in the brain... (damn them!) there are sort of little
						
						tails, the little tails of those nerves, and as soon as they begin
						
						quivering... that is, you see, I look at something with my eyes and
						
						then they begin quivering, those little tails... and when they quiver,
						
						then an image appears... it doesn't appear at once, but an instant,
						
						a second, passes... and then something like a moment appears; that is,
						
						not a moment- devil take the moment!- but an image; that is, an
						
						object, or an action, damn it! That's why I see and then think,
						
						because of those tails, not at all because I've got a soul, and that I
						
						am some sort of image and likeness. All that is nonsense! Rakitin
						
						explained it all to me yesterday, brother, and it simply bowled me
						
						over. It's magnificent, Alyosha, this science! A new man's arising-
						
						that I understand.... And yet I am sorry to lose God!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p32">"Well, that's a good thing, anyway," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p33">"That I am sorry to lose God? It's chemistry, brother,
						
						chemistry! There's no help for it, your reverence, you must make way
						
						for chemistry. And Rakitin does dislike God. Ough! doesn't he
						
						dislike Him! That's the sore point with all of them. But they
						
						conceal it. They tell lies. They pretend. 'Will you preach this in
						
						your reviews?' I asked him. 'Oh, well, if I did it openly, they
						
						won't let it through, 'he said. He laughed. 'But what will become of
						
						men then?' I asked him, 'without God and immortal life? All things are
						
						lawful then, they can do what they like?' 'Didn't you know?' he said
						
						laughing, 'a clever man can do what he likes,' he said. 'A clever
						
						man knows his way about, but you've put your foot in it, committing
						
						a murder, and now you are rotting in prison.' He says that to my face!
						
						A regular pig! I used to kick such people out, but now I listen to
						
						them. He talks a lot of sense, too. Writes well. He began reading me
						
						an article last week. I copied out three lines of it. Wait a minute.
						
						Here it is."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p34">Mitya hurriedly pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket and
						
						read:
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p35">"'In order to determine this question, it is above all essential
						
						to put one's personality in contradiction to one's reality.' Do you
						
						understand that?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p36">"No, I don't," said Alyosha. He looked at Mitya and listened to
						
						him with curiosity.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p37">"I don't understand either. It's dark and obscure, but
						
						intellectual. 'Everyone writes like that now,' he says, 'it's the
						
						effect of their environment.' They are afraid of the environment. He
						
						writes poetry, too, the rascal. He's written in honour of Madame
						
						Hohlakov's foot. Ha ha ha!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p38">"I've heard about it," said Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p39">"Have you? And have you heard the poem?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p40">"No."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p41">"I've got it. Here it is. I'll read it to you. You don't know- I
						
						haven't told you- there's quite a story about it. He's a rascal! Three
						
						weeks ago he began to tease me. 'You've got yourself into a mess, like
						
						a fool, for the sake of three thousand, but I'm going to collar a
						
						hundred and fifty thousand. I am going to marry a widow and buy a
						
						house in Petersburg.' And he told me he was courting Madame
						
						Hohlakov. She hadn't much brains in her youth, and now at forty she
						
						has lost what she had. 'But she's awfully sentimental,' he says;
						
						'that's how I shall get hold of her. When I marry her, I shall take
						
						her to Petersburg and there I shall start a newspaper.' And his
						
						mouth was simply watering, the beast, not for the widow, but for the
						
						hundred and fifty thousand. And he made me believe it. He came to
						
						see me every day. 'She is coming round,' he declared. He was beaming
						
						with delight. And then, all of a sudden, he was turned out of the
						
						house. Perhotin's carrying everything before him, bravo! I could
						
						kiss the silly old noodle for turning him out of the house. And he had
						
						written this doggerel. 'It's the first time I've soiled my hands
						
						with writing poetry,' he said. 'It's to win her heart, so it's in a
						
						good cause. When I get hold of the silly woman's fortune, I can be
						
						of great social utility.' They have this social justification for
						
						every nasty thing they do! 'Anyway it's better than your Pushkin's
						
						poetry,' he said, 'for I've managed to advocate enlightenment even
						
						in that.' I understand what he means about Pushkin, I quite see
						
						that, if he really was a man of talent and only wrote about women's
						
						feet. But wasn't Rakitin stuck up about his doggerel! The vanity of
						
						these fellows! 'On the convalescence of the swollen foot of the object
						
						of my affections'- he thought of that for a title. He's a waggish
						
						fellow.
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p42" /><p id="iv_10-p43">                   A captivating little foot,
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p44">                   Though swollen and red and tender!
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p45">                   The doctors come and plasters put,
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p46">                   But still they cannot mend her.
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p47" /><p id="iv_10-p48">                   Yet, 'tis not for her foot I dread-
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p49">                   A theme for Pushkin's muse more fit-
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p50">                   It's not her foot, it is her head:
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p51">                   I tremble for her loss of wit!
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p52" /><p id="iv_10-p53">                   For as her foot swells, strange to say,
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p54">                   Her intellect is on the wane-
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p55">                   Oh, for some remedy I pray
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p56">                   That may restore both foot and brain!
						
						
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p57" /><p id="iv_10-p58">He is a pig, a regular pig, but he's very arch, the rascal! And he
						
						really has put in a progressive idea. And wasn't he angry when she
						
						kicked him out! He was gnashing his teeth!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p59">"He's taken his revenge already," said Alyosha. "He's written a
						
						paragraph about Madame Hohlakov."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p60">And Alyosha told him briefly about the paragraph in Gossip.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p61">"That's his doing, that's his doing!" Mitya assented, frowning.
						
						"That's him! These paragraphs... I know... the insulting things that
						
						have been written about Grushenka, for instance.... And about Katya,
						
						too.... H'm!
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p62">He walked across the room with a harassed air.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p63">"Brother, I cannot stay long," Alyosha said, after a pause.
						
						"To-morrow will be a great and awful day for you, the judgment of
						
						God will be accomplished... I am amazed at you, you walk about here,
						
						talking of I don't know what..."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p64">"No, don't be amazed at me," Mitya broke in warmly. "Am I to
						
						talk of that stinking dog? Of the murderer? We've talked enough of
						
						him. I don't want to say more of the stinking son of Stinking
						
						Lizaveta! God will kill him, you will see. Hush!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p65">He went up to Alyosha excitedly and kissed him. His eyes glowed.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p66">"Rakitin wouldn't understand it," he began in a sort of
						
						exaltation; "but you, you'll understand it all. That's why I was
						
						thirsting for you. You see, there's so much I've been wanting to
						
						tell you for ever so long, here, within these peeling walls, but I
						
						haven't said a word about what matters most; the moment never seems to
						
						have come. Now I can wait no longer. I must pour out my heart to
						
						you. Brother, these last two months I've found in myself a new man.
						
						A new man has risen up in me. He was hidden in me, but would never
						
						have come to the surface, if it hadn't been for this blow from heaven.
						
						I am afraid! And what do I care if I spend twenty years in the
						
						mines, breaking ore with a hammer? I am not a bit afraid of that- it's
						
						something else I am afraid of now: that that new man may leave me.
						
						Even there, in the mines, underground, I may find a human heart in
						
						another convict and murderer by my side, and I may make friends with
						
						him, for even there one may live and love and suffer. One may thaw and
						
						revive a frozen heart in that convict, one may wait upon him for
						
						years, and at last bring up from the dark depths a lofty soul, a
						
						feeling, suffering creature; one may bring forth an angel, create a
						
						hero! There are so many of them, hundreds of them, and we are all to
						
						blame for them. Why was it I dreamed of that 'babe' at such a
						
						moment? 'Why is the babe so poor?' That was a sign to me at that
						
						moment. It's for the babe I'm going. Because we are all responsible
						
						for all. For all the 'babes,' for there are big children as well as
						
						little children All are 'babes.' I go for all, because someone must go
						
						for all. I didn't kill father, but I've got to go. I accept it. It's
						
						all come to me here, here, within these peeling walls. There are
						
						numbers of them there, hundreds of them underground, with hammers in
						
						their hands. Oh, yes, we shall be in chains and there will be no
						
						freedom, but then, in our great sorrow, we shall rise again to joy,
						
						without which man cannot live nor God exist, for God gives joy: it's
						
						His privilege- a grand one. Ah, man should be dissolved in prayer!
						
						What should I be underground there without God? Rakitin's laughing! If
						
						they drive God from the earth, we shall shelter Him underground. One
						
						cannot exist in prison without God; it's even more impossible than out
						
						of prison. And then we men underground will sing from the bowels of
						
						the earth a glorious hymn to God, with Whom is joy. Hail to God and
						
						His joy! I love Him!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p67">Mitya was almost gasping for breath as he uttered his wild speech.
						
						He turned pale, his lips quivered, and tears rolled down his cheeks.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p68">"Yes, life is full, there is life even underground," he began
						
						again. "You wouldn't believe, Alexey, how I want to live now, what a
						
						thirst for existence and consciousness has sprung up in me within
						
						these peeling walls. Rakitin doesn't understand that; all he cares
						
						about is building a house and letting flats. But I've been longing for
						
						you. And what is suffering? I am not afraid of it, even if it were
						
						beyond reckoning. I am not afraid of it now. I was afraid of it
						
						before. Do you know, perhaps I won't answer at the trial at all....
						
						And I seem to have such strength in me now, that I think I could stand
						
						anything, any suffering, only to be able to say and to repeat to
						
						myself every moment, 'I exist.' In thousands of agonies- I exist.
						
						I'm tormented on the rack- but I exist! Though I sit alone on a
						
						pillar- I exist! I see the sun, and if I don't see the sun, I know
						
						it's there. And there's a whole life in that, in knowing that the
						
						sun is there. Alyosha, my angel, all these philosophies are the
						
						death of me. Damn them! Brother Ivan-"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p69">"What of brother Ivan?" interrupted Alyosha, but Mitya did not
						
						hear.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p70">"You see, I never had any of these doubts before, but it was all
						
						hidden away in me. It was perhaps just because ideas I did not
						
						understand were surging up in me, that I used to drink and fight and
						
						rage. It was to stifle them in myself, to still them, to smother them.
						
						Ivan is not Rakitin, there is an idea in him. Ivan is a sphinx and
						
						is silent; he is always silent. It's God that's worrying me. That's
						
						the only thing that's worrying me. What if He doesn't exist? What if
						
						Rakitin's right- that it's an idea made up by men? Then if He
						
						doesn't exist, man is the chief of the earth, of the universe.
						
						Magnificent! Only how is he going to be good without God? That's the
						
						question. I always come back to that. For whom is man going to love
						
						then? To whom will he be thankful? To whom will he sing the hymn?
						
						Rakitin laughs. Rakitin says that one can love humanity without God.
						
						Well, only a snivelling idiot can maintain that. I can't understand
						
						it. Life's easy for Rakitin. 'You'd better think about the extension
						
						of civic rights, or even of keeping down the price of meat. You will
						
						show your love for humanity more simply and directly by that, than
						
						by philosophy.' I answered him, 'Well, but you, without a God, are
						
						more likely to raise the price of meat, if it suits you, and make a
						
						rouble on every copeck.' He lost his temper. But after all, what is
						
						goodness? Answer me that, Alexey. Goodness is one thing with me and
						
						another with a Chinaman, so it's a relative thing. Or isn't it? Is
						
						it not relative? A treacherous question! You won't laugh if I tell you
						
						it's kept me awake two nights. I only wonder now how people can live
						
						and think nothing about it. Vanity! Ivan has no God. He has an idea.
						
						It's beyond me. But he is silent. I believe he is a Freemason. I asked
						
						him, but he is silent. I wanted to drink from the springs of his soul-
						
						he was silent. But once he did drop a word."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p71">"What did he say?" Alyosha took it up quickly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p72">"I said to him, 'Then everything is lawful, if it is so?' He
						
						frowned. 'Fyodor Pavlovitch, our papa,' he said, 'was a pig, but his
						
						ideas were right enough.' That was what he dropped. That was all he
						
						said. That was going one better than Rakitin."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p73">"Yes," Alyosha assented bitterly. "When was he with you?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p74">"Of that later; now I must speak of something else. I have said
						
						nothing about Ivan to you before. I put it off to the last. When my
						
						business here is over and the verdict has been given, then I'll tell
						
						you something. I'll tell you everything. We've something tremendous on
						
						hand.... And you shall be my judge in it. But don't begin about that
						
						now; be silent. You talk of to-morrow, of the trial; but, would you
						
						believe it, I know nothing about it."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p75">"Have you talked to the counsel?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p76">"What's the use of the counsel? I told him all about it. He's a
						
						soft, city-bred rogue- a Bernard! But he doesn't believe me- not a bit
						
						of it. Only imagine, he believes I did it. I see it. 'In that case,' I
						
						asked him, 'why have you come to defend me?' Hang them all! They've
						
						got a doctor down, too, want to prove I'm mad. I won't have that!
						
						Katerina Ivanovna wants to do her 'duty' to the end, whatever the
						
						strain!" Mitya smiled bitterly. "The cat! Hard-hearted creature! She
						
						knows that I said of her at Mokroe that she was a woman of 'great
						
						wrath.' They repeated it. Yes, the facts against me have grown
						
						numerous as the sands of the sea. Grigory sticks to his point.
						
						Grigory's honest, but a fool. Many people are honest because they
						
						are fools: that's Rakitin's idea. Grigory's my enemy. And there are
						
						some people who are better as foes than friends. I mean Katerina
						
						Ivanovna. I am afraid, oh, I am afraid she will tell how she bowed
						
						to the ground after that four thousand. She'll pay it back to the last
						
						farthing. I don't want her sacrifice; they'll put me to shame at the
						
						trial. I wonder how I can stand it. Go to her, Alyosha, ask her not to
						
						speak of that in the court, can't you? But damn it all, it doesn't
						
						matter! I shall get through somehow. I don't pity her. It's her own
						
						doing. She deserves what she gets. I shall have my own story to
						
						tell, Alexey." He smiled bitterly again. "Only... only Grusha, Grusha!
						
						Good Lord! Why should she have such suffering to bear?" he exclaimed
						
						suddenly, with tears. "Grusha's killing me; the thought of her's
						
						killing me, killing me. She was with me just now..."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p77">"She told me she was very much grieved by you to-day."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p78">"I know. Confound my temper! It was jealousy. I was sorry, I
						
						kissed her as she was going. I didn't ask her forgiveness."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p79">"Why didn't you?" exclaimed Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p80">Suddenly Mitya laughed almost mirthfully.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p81">"God preserve you, my dear boy, from ever asking forgiveness for a
						
						fault from a woman you love. From one you love especially, however
						
						greatly you may have been in fault. For a woman- devil only knows what
						
						to make of a woman! I know something about them, anyway. But try
						
						acknowledging you are in fault to a woman. Say, 'I am sorry, forgive
						
						me,' and a shower of reproaches will follow! Nothing will make her
						
						forgive you simply and directly, she'll humble you to the dust,
						
						bring forward things that have never happened, recall everything,
						
						forget nothing, add something of her own, and only then forgive you.
						
						And even the best, the best of them do it. She'll scrape up all the
						
						scrapings and load them on your head. They are ready to flay you
						
						alive, I tell you, every one of them, all these angels without whom we
						
						cannot live! I tell you plainly and openly, dear boy, every decent man
						
						ought to be under some woman's thumb. That's my conviction- not
						
						conviction, but feeling. A man ought to be magnanimous, and it's no
						
						disgrace to a man! No disgrace to a hero, not even a Caesar! But don't
						
						ever beg her pardon all the same for anything. Remember that rule
						
						given you by your brother Mitya, who's come to ruin through women. No,
						
						I'd better make it up to Grusha somehow, without begging pardon. I
						
						worship her, Alexey, worship her. Only she doesn't see it. No, she
						
						still thinks I don't love her enough. And she tortures me, tortures me
						
						with her love. The past was nothing! In the past it was only those
						
						infernal curves of hers that tortured me, but now I've taken all her
						
						soul into my soul and through her I've become a man myself. Will
						
						they marry us? If they don't, I shall die of jealousy. I imagine
						
						something every day.... What did she say to you about me?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p82">Alyosha repeated all Grushenka had said to him that day. Mitya
						
						listened, made him repeat things, and seemed pleased.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p83">"Then she is not angry at my being jealous?" he exclaimed. "She is
						
						a regular woman! 'I've a fierce heart myself!' Ah, I love such
						
						fierce hearts, though I can't bear anyone's being jealous of me. I
						
						can't endure it. We shall fight. But I shall love her, I shall love
						
						her infinitely. Will they marry us? Do they let convicts marry? That's
						
						the question. And without her I can't exist..."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p84">Mitya walked frowning across the room. It was almost dark. He
						
						suddenly seemed terribly worried.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p85">"So there's a secret, she says, a secret? We have got up a plot
						
						against her, and Katya is mixed up in it, she thinks. No, my good
						
						Grushenka, that's not it. You are very wide of the mark, in your
						
						foolish feminine way. Alyosha, darling, well, here goes! I'll tell you
						
						our secret!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p86">He looked round, went close up quickly to Alyosha, who was
						
						standing before him, and whispered to him with an air of mystery,
						
						though in reality no one could hear them: the old warder was dozing in
						
						the corner, and not a word could reach the ears of the soldiers on
						
						guard.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p87">"I will tell you all our secret," Mitya whispered hurriedly. "I
						
						meant to tell you later, for how could I decide on anything without
						
						you? You are everything to me. Though I say that Ivan is superior to
						
						us, you are my angel. It's your decision will decide it. Perhaps
						
						it's you that is superior and not Ivan. You see, it's a question of
						
						conscience, question of the higher conscience- the secret is so
						
						important that I can't settle it myself, and I've put it off till I
						
						could speak to you. But anyway it's too early to decide now, for we
						
						must wait for the verdict. As soon as the verdict is given, you
						
						shall decide my fate. Don't decide it now. I'll tell you now. You
						
						listen, but don't decide. Stand and keep quiet. I won't tell you
						
						everything. I'll only tell you the idea, without details, and you keep
						
						quiet. Not a question, not a movement. You agree? But, goodness,
						
						what shall I do with your eyes? I'm afraid your eyes will tell me your
						
						decision, even if you don't speak. Oo! I'm afraid! Alyosha, listen!
						
						Ivan suggests my escaping. I won't tell you the details: it's all been
						
						thought out: it can all be arranged. Hush, don't decide. I should go
						
						to America with Grusha. You know I can't live without Grusha! What
						
						if they won't let her follow me to Siberia? Do they let convicts get
						
						married? Ivan thinks not. And without Grusha what should I do there
						
						underground with a hammer? I should only smash my skull with the
						
						hammer! But, on the other hand, my conscience? I should have run
						
						away from suffering. A sign has come, I reject the sign. I have a
						
						way of salvation and I turn my back on it. Ivan says that in
						
						America, 'with the goodwill,' I can be of more use than underground.
						
						But what becomes of our hymn from underground? What's America? America
						
						is vanity again! And there's a lot of swindling in America, too, I
						
						expect. I should have run away from crucifixion! I tell you, you know,
						
						Alexey, because you are the only person who can understand this.
						
						There's no one else. It's folly, madness to others, all I've told
						
						you of the hymn. They'll say I'm out of my mind or a fool. I am not
						
						out of my mind and I am not a fool. Ivan understands about the hymn,
						
						too. He understands, only he doesn't answer- he doesn't speak. He
						
						doesn't believe in the hymn. Don't speak, don't speak. I see how you
						
						look! You have already decided. Don't decide, spare me! I can't live
						
						without Grusha. Wait till after the trial!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p88">Mitya ended beside himself. He held Alyosha with both hands on his
						
						shoulders, and his yearning, feverish eyes were fixed on his
						
						brother's.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p89">"They don't let convicts marry, do they?" he repeated for the
						
						third time in a supplicating voice.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p90">Alyosha listened with extreme surprise and was deeply moved.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p91">"Tell me one thing," he said. "Is Ivan very keen on it, and
						
						whose idea was it?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p92">"His, his, and he is very keen on it. He didn't come to see me
						
						at first, then he suddenly came a week ago and he began about it
						
						straight away. He is awfully keen on it. He doesn't ask me, but orders
						
						me to escape. He doesn't doubt of my obeying him, though I showed
						
						him all my heart as I have to you, and told him about the hymn, too.
						
						He told me he'd arrange it; he's found out about everything. But of
						
						that later. He's simply set on it. It's all a matter of money: he'll
						
						pay ten thousand for escape and give me twenty thousand for America.
						
						And he says we can arrange a magnificent escape for ten thousand."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p93">"And he told you on no account to tell me?" Alyosha asked again.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p94">"To tell no one, and especially not you; on no account to tell
						
						you. He is afraid, no doubt, that you'll stand before me as my
						
						conscience. Don't tell him I told you. Don't tell him, for anything."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p95">"You are right," Alyosha pronounced; "it's impossible to decide
						
						anything before the trial is over. After the trial you'll decide of
						
						yourself. Then you'll find that new man in yourself and he will
						
						decide."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p96">"A new man, or a Bernard who'll decide a la Bernard, for I believe
						
						I'm a contemptible Bernard myself," said Mitya, with a bitter grin.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p97">"But, brother, have you no hope then of being acquitted?"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p98">Mitya shrugged his shoulders nervously and shook his head.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p99">"Alyosha, darling, it's time you were going," he said, with a
						
						sudden haste. "There's the superintendent shouting in the yard.
						
						He'll be here directly. We are late; it's irregular. Embrace me
						
						quickly. Kiss me! Sign me with the cross, darling, for the cross I
						
						have to bear to-morrow."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p100">They embraced and kissed.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p101">"Ivan," said Mitya suddenly, "suggests my escaping; but, of
						
						course, he believes I did it."
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p102">A mournful smile came on to his lips.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p103">"Have you asked him whether he believes it?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p104">"No, I haven't. I wanted to, but I couldn't. I hadn't the courage.
						
						But I saw it from his eyes. Well, good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p105">Once more they kissed hurriedly, and Alyosha was just going out,
						
						when Mitya suddenly called him back.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p106">"Stand facing me! That's right!" And again he seized Alyosha,
						
						putting both hands on his shoulders. His face became suddenly quite
						
						pale, so that it was dreadfully apparent, even through the gathering
						
						darkness. His lips twitched, his eyes fastened upon Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p107">"Alyosha, tell me the whole truth, as you would before God. Do you
						
						believe I did it? Do you, do you in yourself, believe it? The whole
						
						truth, don't lie!" he cried desperately.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p108">Everything seemed heaving before Alyosha, and he felt something
						
						like a stab at his heart.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p109">"Hush! What do you mean?" he faltered helplessly.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p110">"The whole truth, the whole, don't lie!" repeated Mitya.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p111">"I've never for one instant believed that you were the
						
						murderer!" broke in a shaking voice from Alyosha's breast, and he
						
						raised his right hand in the air, as though calling God to witness his
						
						words.
						
						</p><p id="iv_10-p112">Mitya's whole face was lighted up with bliss.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p113">"Thank you!" he articulated slowly, as though letting a sigh
						
						escape him after fainting. "Now you have given me new life. Would
						
						you believe it, till this moment I've been afraid to ask you, you,
						
						even you. Well, go! You've given me strength for to-morrow. God
						
						bless you! Come, go along! Love Ivan!" was Mitya's last word.
						
							</p><p id="iv_10-p114">Alyosha went out in tears. Such distrustfulness in Mitya, such
						
						lack of confidence even to him, to Alyosha- all this suddenly opened
						
						before Alyosha an unsuspected depth of hopeless grief and despair in
						
						the soul of his unhappy brother. Intense, infinite compassion
						
						overwhelmed him instantly. There was a poignant ache in his torn
						
						heart. "Love Ivan"- he suddenly recalled Mitya's words. And he was
						
						going to Ivan. He badly wanted to see Ivan all day. He was as much
						
						worried about Ivan as about Mitya, and more than ever now.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - Not You, Not You!" prev="iv_10" next="vi_7" id="v_8">
					
					
							<p id="v_8-p1">ON the way to Ivan he had to pass the house where Katerina
						
						Ivanovna was living. There was light in the windows. He suddenly
						
						stopped and resolved to go in. He had not seen Katerina Ivanovna for
						
						more than a week. But now it struck him that Ivan might be with her,
						
						especially on the eve of the terrible day. Ringing, and mounting the
						
						staircase, which was dimly lighted by a Chinese lantern, he saw a
						
						man coming down, and as they met, he recognised him as his brother. So
						
						he was just coming from Katerina Ivanovna.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p2">"Ah, it's only you," said Ivan dryly. "Well, good-bye! You are
						
						going to her?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p3">"Yes."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p4">"I don't advise you to; she's upset and you'll upset her more."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p5">A door was instantly flung open above, and a voice cried suddenly:
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p6">"No, no! Alexey Fyodorovitch, have you come from him?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p7">"Yes, I have been with him."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p8">"Has he sent me any message? Come up, Alyosha, and you, Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch, you must come back, you must. Do you hear?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p9">There was such a peremptory note in Katya's voice that Ivan, after
						
						a moment's hesitation, made up his mind to go back with Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p10">"She was listening," he murmured angrily to himself, but Alyosha
						
						heard it.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p11">"Excuse my keeping my greatcoat on," said Ivan, going into the
						
						drawing-room. "I won't sit down. I won't stay more than a minute."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p12">"Sit down, Alexey Fyodorovitch," said Katerina Ivanovna, though
						
						she remained standing. She had changed very little during this time,
						
						but there was an ominous gleam in her dark eyes. Alyosha remembered
						
						afterwards that she had struck him as particularly handsome at that
						
						moment.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p13">"What did he ask you to tell me?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p14">"Only one thing," said Alyosha, looking her straight in the
						
						face, "that you would spare yourself and say nothing at the trial of
						
						what" (he was a little confused) "...passed between you... at the time
						
						of your first acquaintance... in that town."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p15">"Ah! that I bowed down to the ground for that money!" She broke
						
						into a bitter laugh. "Why, is he afraid for me or for himself? He asks
						
						me to spare- whom? Him or myself? Tell me, Alexey Fyodorovitch!"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p16">Alyosha watched her intently, trying to understand her.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p17">"Both yourself and him," he answered softly.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p18">"I am glad to hear it," she snapped out maliciously, and she
						
						suddenly blushed.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p19">"You don't know me yet, Alexey Fyodorovitch," she said menacingly.
						
						"And I don't know myself yet. Perhaps you'll want to trample me
						
						under foot after my examination to-morrow."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p20">"You will give your evidence honourably," said Alyosha; "that's
						
						all that's wanted."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p21">"Women are often dishonourable," she snarled. "Only an hour ago
						
						I was thinking I felt afraid to touch that monster... as though he
						
						were a reptile... but no, he is still a human being to me! But did
						
						he do it? Is he the murderer?" she cried, all of a sudden,
						
						hysterically, turning quickly to Ivan. Alyosha saw at once that she
						
						had asked Ivan that question before, perhaps only a moment before he
						
						came in, and not for the first time, but for the hundredth, and that
						
						they had ended by quarrelling.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p22">"I've been to see Smerdyakov.... It was you, you who persuaded
						
						me that he murdered his father. It's only you I believed" she
						
						continued, still addressing Ivan. He gave her a sort of strained
						
						smile. Alyosha started at her tone. He had not suspected such familiar
						
						intimacy between them.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p23">"Well, that's enough, anyway," Ivan cut short the conversation. "I
						
						am going. I'll come to-morrow." And turning at once, he walked out
						
						of the room and went straight downstairs.
						
							With an imperious gesture, Katerina Ivanovna seized Alyosha by
						
						both hands.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p24">"Follow him! Overtake him! Don't leave him alone for a minute!"
						
						she said, in a hurried whisper. "He's mad! Don't you know that he's
						
						mad? He is in a fever, nervous fever. The doctor told me so. Go, run
						
						after him...."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p25">Alyosha jumped up and ran after Ivan, who was not fifty paces
						
						ahead of him.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p26">"What do you want?" He turned quickly on Alyosha, seeing that he
						
						was running after him. "She told you to catch me up, because I'm
						
						mad. I know it all by heart," he added irritably.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p27">"She is mistaken, of course; but she is right that you are ill,"
						
						said Alyosha. "I was looking at your face just now. You look very ill,
						
						Ivan."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p28">Ivan walked on without stopping. Alyosha followed him.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p29">"And do you know, Alexey Fyodorovitch, how people do go out of
						
						their minds?" Ivan asked in a a voice suddenly quiet, without a
						
						trace of irritation, with a note of the simplest curiosity.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p30">"No, I don't. I suppose there are all kinds of insanity."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p31">"And can one observe that one's going mad oneself?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p32">"I imagine one can't see oneself clearly in such circumstances,"
						
						Alyosha answered with surprise.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p33">Ivan paused for half a minute.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p34">"If you want to talk to me, please change the subject," he said
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p35">"Oh, while I think of it, I have a letter for you," said Alyosha
						
						timidly, and he took Lise's note from his pocket and held it out to
						
						Ivan. They were just under a lamp-post. Ivan recognised the
						
						handwriting at once.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p36">"Ah, from that little demon!" he laughed maliciously, and, without
						
						opening the envelope, he tore it into bits and threw it in the air.
						
						The bits were scattered by the wind.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p37">"She's not sixteen yet, I believe, and already offering
						
						herself," he said contemptuously, striding along the street again.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p38">"How do you mean, offering herself?" exclaimed Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p39">"As wanton women offer themselves, to be sure."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p40">"How can you, Ivan, how can you?" Alyosha cried warmly, in a
						
						grieved voice. "She is a child; you are insulting a child! She is ill;
						
						she is very ill, too. She is on the verge of insanity, too,
						
						perhaps.... I had hoped to hear something from you... that would
						
						save her."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p41">"You'll hear nothing from me. If she is a child, I am not her
						
						nurse. Be quiet, Alexey. Don't go on about her. I am not even thinking
						
						about it."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p42">They were silent again for a moment.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p43">"She will be praying all night now to the Mother of God to show
						
						her how to act to-morrow at the trial," he said sharply and angrily
						
						again.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p44">"You... you mean Katerina Ivanovna?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p45">"Yes. Whether she's to save Mitya or ruin him. She'll pray for
						
						light from above. She can't make up her mind for herself, you see. She
						
						has not had time to decide yet. She takes me for her nurse, too. She
						
						wants me to sing lullabies to her."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p46">"Katerina Ivanovna loves you, brother," said Alyosha sadly.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p47">"Perhaps; but I am not very keen on her."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p48">"She is suffering. Why do you... sometimes say things to her
						
						that give her hope?" Alyosha went on, with timid reproach. "I know
						
						that you've given her hope. Forgive me for speaking to you like this,"
						
						he added.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p49">"I can't behave to her as I ought- break off altogether and tell
						
						her so straight out," said Ivan, irritably. "I must wait till sentence
						
						is passed on the murderer. If I break off with her now, she will
						
						avenge herself on me by ruining that scoundrel to-morrow at the trial,
						
						for she hates him and knows she hates him. It's all a lie- lie upon
						
						lie! As long as I don't break off with her, she goes on hoping, and
						
						she won't ruin that monster, knowing how I want to get him out of
						
						trouble. If only that damned verdict would come!"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p50">The words "murderer" and "monster" echoed painfully in Alyosha's
						
						heart.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p51">"But how can she ruin Mitya?" he asked, pondering on Ivan's words.
						
						"What evidence can she give that would ruin Mitya?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p52">"You don't know that yet. She's got a document in her hands, in
						
						Mitya's own writing, that proves conclusively that he did murder
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p53">"That's impossible!" cried Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p54">"Why is it impossible? I've read it myself."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p55">"There can't be such a document!" Alyosha repeated warmly.
						
						"There can't be, because he's not the murderer. It's not he murdered
						
						father, not he!"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p56">Ivan suddenly stopped.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p57">"Who is the murderer then, according to you?" he asked, with
						
						apparent coldness. There was even a supercilious note in his voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p58">"You know who," Alyosha pronounced in a low, penetrating voice.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p59">"Who? You mean the myth about that crazy idiot, the epileptic,
						
						Smerdyakov?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p60">Alyosha suddenly felt himself trembling all over.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p61">"You know who," broke helplessly from him. He could scarcely
						
						breathe.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p62">"Who? Who?" Ivan cried almost fiercely. All his restraint suddenly
						
						vanished.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p63">"I only know one thing," Alyosha went on, still almost in a
						
						whisper, "it wasn't you killed father."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p64">"'Not you'! What do you mean by 'not you'?" Ivan was
						
						thunderstruck.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p65">"It was not you killed father, not you! Alyosha repeated firmly.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p66">The silence lasted for half a minute.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p67">"I know I didn't. Are you raving?" said Ivan, with a pale,
						
						distorted smile. His eyes were riveted on Alyosha. They were
						
						standing again under a lamp-post.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p68">"No, Ivan. You've told yourself several times that you are the
						
						murderer."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p69">"When did I say so? I was in Moscow.... When have I said so?" Ivan
						
						faltered helplessly.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p70">"You've said so to yourself many times, when you've been alone
						
						during these two dreadful months," Alyosha went on softly and
						
						distinctly as before. Yet he was speaking now, as it were, not of
						
						himself, not of his own will, but obeying some irresistible command.
						
						"You have accused yourself and have confessed to yourself that you are
						
						the murderer and no one else. But you didn't do it: you are
						
						mistaken: you are not the murderer. Do you hear? It was not you! God
						
						has sent me to tell you so."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p71">They were both silent. The silence lasted a whole long minute.
						
						They were both standing still, gazing into each other's eyes. They
						
						were both pale. Suddenly Ivan began trembling all over, and clutched
						
						Alyosha's shoulder.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p72">"You've been in my room!" he whispered hoarsely. "You've been
						
						there at night, when he came.... Confess... have you seen him, have
						
						you seen him?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p73">"Whom do you mean- Mitya?" Alyosha asked, bewildered.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p74">"Not him, damn the monster!" Ivan shouted, in a frenzy, "Do you
						
						know that he visits me? How did you find out? Speak!"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p75">"Who is he? I don't know whom you are talking about," Alyosha
						
						faltered, beginning to be alarmed.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p76">"Yes, you do know. or how could you- ? It's impossible that you
						
						don't know."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p77">Suddenly he seemed to check himself. He stood still and seemed
						
						to reflect. A strange grin contorted his lips.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p78">"Brother," Alyosha began again, in a shaking voice, "I have said
						
						this to you, because you'll believe my word, I know that. I tell you
						
						once and for all, it's not you. You hear, once for all! God has put it
						
						into my heart to say this to you, even though it may make you hate
						
						me from this hour."
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p79">But by now Ivan had apparently regained his self-control.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p80">"Alexey Fyodorovitch," he said, with a cold smile, "I can't endure
						
						prophets and epileptics- messengers from God especially- and you
						
						know that only too well. I break off all relations with you from
						
						this moment and probably for ever. I beg you to leave me at this
						
						turning. It's the way to your lodgings, too. You'd better be
						
						particularly careful not to come to me to-day! Do you hear?"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p81">He turned and walked on with a firm step, not looking back.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p82">"Brother," Alyosha called after him, "if anything happens to you
						
						to-day, turn to me before anyone!"
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p83">But Ivan made no reply. Alyosha stood under the lamp-post at the
						
						cross roads, till Ivan had vanished into the darkness. Then he
						
						turned and walked slowly homewards. Both Alyosha and Ivan were
						
						living in lodgings; neither of them was willing to live in Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch's empty house. Alyosha had a furnished room in the house of
						
						some working people. Ivan lived some distance from him. He had taken a
						
						roomy and fairly comfortable lodge attached to a fine house that
						
						belonged to a well-to-do lady, the widow of an official. But his
						
						only attendant was a deaf and rheumatic old crone who went to bed at
						
						six o'clock every evening and got up at six in the morning. Ivan had
						
						become remarkably indifferent to his comforts of late, and very fond
						
						of being alone. He did everything for himself in the one room he lived
						
						in, and rarely entered any of the other rooms in his abode.
						
							</p><p id="v_8-p84">He reached the gate of the house and had his hand on the bell,
						
						when he suddenly stopped. He felt that he was trembling all over
						
						with anger. Suddenly he let go of the bell, turned back with a
						
						curse, and walked with rapid steps in the opposite direction. He
						
						walked a mile and a half to a tiny, slanting, wooden house, almost a
						
						hut, where Marya Kondratyevna, the neighbour who used to come to
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch's kitchen for soup and to whom Smerdyakov had once
						
						sung his songs and played on the guitar, was now lodging. She had sold
						
						their little house, and was now living here with her mother.
						
						Smerdyakov, who was ill- almost dying-had been with them ever since
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch's death. It was to him Ivan was going now, drawn
						
						by a sudden and irresistible prompting.</p>					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - The First Interview with Smerdyakov" prev="v_8" next="vii_7" id="vi_7">

							<p id="vi_7-p1">THIS was the third time that Ivan had been to see Smerdyakov since
						
						his return from Moscow. The first time he had seen him and talked to
						
						him was on the first day of his arrival, then he had visited him
						
						once more, a fortnight later. But his visits had ended with that
						
						second one, so that it was now over a month since he had seen him. And
						
						he had scarcely heard anything of him.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p2">Ivan had only returned five days after his father's death, so that
						
						he was not present at the funeral, which took place the day before
						
						he came back. The cause of his delay was that Alyosha, not knowing his
						
						Moscow address, had to apply to Katerina Ivanovna to telegraph to him,
						
						and she, not knowing his address either, telegraphed to her sister and
						
						aunt, reckoning on Ivan's going to see them as soon as he arrived in
						
						Moscow. But he did not go to them till four days after his arrival.
						
						When he got the telegram, he had, of course, set off post-haste to our
						
						town. The first to meet him was Alyosha, and Ivan was greatly
						
						surprised to find that, in opposition to the general opinion of the
						
						town, he refused to entertain a suspicion against Mitya, and spoke
						
						openly of Smerdyakov as the murderer. Later on, after seeing the
						
						police captain and the prosecutor, and hearing the details of the
						
						charge and the arrest, he was still more surprised at Alyosha, and
						
						ascribed his opinion only to his exaggerated brotherly feeling and
						
						sympathy with Mitya, of whom Alyosha, as Ivan knew, was very fond.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p3">By the way, let us say a word or two of Ivan's feeling to his
						
						brother Dmitri. He positively disliked him; at most, felt sometimes
						
						a compassion for him, and even that was mixed with great contempt,
						
						almost repugnance. Mitya's whole personality, even his appearance, was
						
						extremely unattractive to him. Ivan looked with indignation on
						
						Katerina Ivanovna's love for his brother. Yet he went to see Mitya
						
						on the first day of his arrival, and that interview, far from
						
						shaking Ivan's belief in his guilt, positively strengthened it. He
						
						found his brother agitated, nervously excited. Mitya had been
						
						talkative, but very absent-minded and incoherent. He used violent
						
						language, accused Smerdyakov, and was fearfully muddled. He talked
						
						principally about the three thousand roubles, which he said had been
						
						"stolen" from him by his father.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p4">"The money was mine, it was my money," Mitya kept repeating. "Even
						
						if I had stolen it, I should have had the right."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p5">He hardly contested the evidence against him, and if he tried to
						
						turn a fact to his advantage, it was in an absurd and incoherent
						
						way. He hardly seemed to wish to defend himself to Ivan or anyone
						
						else. Quite the contrary, he was angry and proudly scornful of the
						
						charges against him; he was continually firing up and abusing
						
						everyone. He only laughed contemptuously at Grigory's evidence about
						
						the open door, and declared that it was "the devil that opened it."
						
						But he could not bring forward any coherent explanation of the fact.
						
						He even succeeded in insulting Ivan during their first interview,
						
						telling him sharply that it was not for people who declared that
						
						"everything was lawful," to suspect and question him. Altogether he
						
						was anything but friendly with Ivan on that occasion. Immediately
						
						after that interview with Mitya, Ivan went for the first time to see
						
						Smerdyakov.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p6">In the railway train on his way from Moscow, he kept thinking of
						
						Smerdyakov and of his last conversation with him on the evening before
						
						he went away. Many things seemed to him puzzling and suspicious.
						
						when he gave his evidence to the investigating lawyer Ivan said
						
						nothing, for the time, of that conversation. He put that off till he
						
						had seen Smerdyakov, who was at that time in the hospital.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p7">Doctor Herzenstube and Varvinsky, the doctor he met in the
						
						hospital, confidently asserted in reply to Ivan's persistent
						
						questions, that Smerdyakov's epileptic attack was unmistakably
						
						genuine, and were surprised indeed at Ivan asking whether he might not
						
						have been shamming on the day of the catastrophe. They gave him to
						
						understand that the attack was an exceptional one, the fits persisting
						
						and recurring several times, so that the patient's life was positively
						
						in danger, and it was only now, after they had applied remedies,
						
						that they could assert with confidence that the patient would survive.
						
						"Though it might well be," added Doctor Herzenstube, "that his
						
						reason would be impaired for a considerable period, if not
						
						permanently." On Ivan's asking impatiently whether that meant that
						
						he was now mad, they told him that this was not yet the case, in the
						
						full sense of the word, but that certain abnormalities were
						
						perceptible. Ivan decided to find out for himself what those
						
						abnormalities were.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p8">At the hospital he was at once allowed to see the patient.
						
						Smerdyakov was lying on a truckle-bed in a separate ward. There was
						
						only one other bed in the room, and in it lay a tradesman of the town,
						
						swollen with dropsy, who was obviously almost dying; he could be no
						
						hindrance to their conversation. Smerdyakov grinned uncertainly on
						
						seeing Ivan, and for the first instant seemed nervous. So at least
						
						Ivan fancied. But that was only momentary. For the rest of the time he
						
						was struck, on the contrary, by Smerdyakov's composure. From the first
						
						glance Ivan had no doubt that he was very ill. He was very weak; he
						
						spoke slowly, seeming to move his tongue with difficulty; he was
						
						much thinner and sallower.Throughout the interview, which lasted
						
						twenty minutes, he kept complaining of headache and of pain in all his
						
						limbs. His thin emasculate face seemed to have become so tiny; his
						
						hair was ruffled, and his crest of curls in front stood up in a thin
						
						tuft. But in the left eye, which was screwed up and seemed to be
						
						insinuating something, Smerdyakov showed himself unchanged. "It's
						
						always worth while speaking to a clever man." Ivan was reminded of
						
						that at once. He sat down on the stool at his feet. Smerdyakov, with
						
						painful effort, shifted his position in bed, but he was not the
						
						first to speak. He remained dumb, and did not even look much
						
						interested.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p9">"Can you. talk to me?" asked Ivan. "I won't tire you much."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p10">"Certainly I can," mumbled Smerdyakov, in a faint voice. "Has your
						
						honour been back long?" he added patronisingly, as though
						
						encouraging a nervous visitor.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p11">"I only arrived to-day.... To see the mess you are in here."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p12">Smerdyakov sighed.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p13">"Why do you sigh? You knew of it all along," Ivan blurted out.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p14">Smerdyakov was stolidly silent for a while.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p15">"How could I help knowing? It was clear beforehand. But how
						
						could I tell it would turn out like that?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p16">"What would turn out? Don't prevaricate! You've foretold you'd
						
						have a fit; on the way down to the cellar, you know. You mentioned the
						
						very spot."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p17">"Have you said so at the examination yet?" Smerdyakov queried with
						
						composure.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p18">Ivan felt suddenly angry.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p19">"No, I haven't yet, but I certainly shall. You must explain a
						
						great deal to me, my man; and let me tell you, I am not going to let
						
						you play with me!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p20">"Why should I play with you, when I put my whole trust in you,
						
						as in God Almighty?" said Smerdyakov, with the same composure, only
						
						for a moment closing his eyes.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p21">"In the first place," began Ivan, "I know that epileptic fits
						
						can't be told beforehand. I've inquired; don't try and take me in. You
						
						can't foretell the day and the hour. How was it you told me the day
						
						and the hour beforehand, and about the cellar, too? How could you tell
						
						that you would fall down the cellar stairs in a fit, if you didn't
						
						sham a fit on purpose?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p22">"I had to go to the cellar anyway, several times a day, indeed,"
						
						Smerdyakov drawled deliberately. "I fell from the garret just in the
						
						same way a year ago. It's quite true you can't tell the day and hour
						
						of a fit beforehand, but you can always have a presentiment of it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p23">"But you did foretell the day and the hour!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p24">"In regard to my epilepsy, sir, you had much better inquire of the
						
						doctors here. You can ask them whether it was a real fit or a sham;
						
						it's no use my saying any more about it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p25">"And the cellar? How could you know beforehand of the cellar?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p26">"You don't seem able to get over that cellar! As I was going
						
						down to the cellar, I was in terrible dread and doubt. What frightened
						
						me most was losing you and being left without defence in all the
						
						world. So I went down into the cellar thinking, 'Here, it'll come on
						
						directly, it'll strike me down directly, shall I fall?' And it was
						
						through this fear that I suddenly felt the spasm that always
						
						comes... and so I went flying. All that and all my previous
						
						conversation with you at the gate the evening before, when I told
						
						you how frightened I was and spoke of the cellar, I told all that to
						
						Doctor Herzenstube and Nikolay Parfenovitch, the investigating lawyer,
						
						and it's all been written down in the protocol. And the doctor here,
						
						Mr. Varvinsky, maintained to all of them that it was just the
						
						thought of it brought it on, the apprehension that I might fall. It
						
						was just then that the fit seized me. And so they've written it
						
						down, that it's just how it must have happened, simply from my fear."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p27">As he finished, Smerdyakov. drew a deep breath, as though
						
						exhausted.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p28">"Then you have said all that in your evidence?" said Ivan,
						
						somewhat taken aback. He had meant to frighten him with the threat
						
						of repeating their conversation, and it appeared that Smerdyakov had
						
						already reported it all himself.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p29">"What have I to be afraid of? Let them write down the whole
						
						truth," Smerdyakov pronounced firmly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p30">"And have you told them every word of our conversation at the
						
						gate?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p31">"No, not to say every word."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p32">"And did you tell them that you can sham fits, as you boasted
						
						then?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p33">"No, I didn't tell them that either."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p34">"Tell me now, why did you send me then to Tchermashnya?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p35">"I was afraid you'd go away to Moscow; Tchermashnya is nearer,
						
						anyway."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p36">"You are lying; you suggested my going away yourself; you told
						
						me to get out of the way of trouble."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p37">"That was simply out of affection and my sincere devotion to
						
						you, foreseeing trouble in the house, to spare you. Only I wanted to
						
						spare myself even more. That's why I told you to get out of harm's
						
						way, that you might understand that there would be trouble in the
						
						house, and would remain at home to protect your father."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p38">"You might have said it more directly, you blockhead!" Ivan
						
						suddenly fired up.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p39">"How could I have said it more directly then? It was simply my
						
						fear that made me speak, and you might have been angry, too. I might
						
						well have been apprehensive that Dmitri Fyodorovitch would make a
						
						scene  and carry away that money, for he considered it as good as
						
						his own; but who could tell that it would end in a murder like this? I
						
						thought that he would only carry off the three thousand that lay under
						
						the master's mattress in the envelope, and you see, he's murdered him.
						
						How could you guess it either, sir?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p40">"But if you say yourself that it couldn't be guessed, how could
						
						I have guessed and stayed at home? You contradict yourself!" said
						
						Ivan, pondering.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p41">"You might have guessed from my sending you to Tchermashnya and
						
						not to Moscow."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p42">"How could I guess it from that?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p43">Smerdyakov seemed much exhausted, and again he was silent for a
						
						minute.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p44">"You might have guessed from the fact of my asking you not to go
						
						to Moscow, but to Tchermashnya, that I wanted to have you nearer,
						
						for Moscow's a long way off, and Dmitri Fyodorovitch, knowing you
						
						are not far off, would not be so bold. And if anything had happened,
						
						you might have come to protect me, too, for I warned you of Grigory
						
						Vassilyevitch's illness, and that I was afraid of having a fit. And
						
						when I explained those knocks to you, by means of which one could go
						
						in to the deceased, and that Dmitri Fyodorovitch knew them all through
						
						me, I thought that you would guess yourself that he would be sure to
						
						do something, and so wouldn't go to Tchermashnya even, but would
						
						stay."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p45">"He talks very coherently," thought Ivan, "though he does
						
						mumble; what's the derangement of his faculties that Herzenstube
						
						talked of?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p46">"You are cunning with me, damn you!" he exclaimed, getting angry.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p47">"But I thought at the time that you quite guessed," Smerdyakov
						
						parried with the simplest air.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p48">"If I'd guessed, I should have stayed," cried Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p49">"Why, I thought that it was because you guessed, that you went
						
						away in such a hurry, only to get out of trouble, only to run away and
						
						save yourself in your fright."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p50">"You think that everyone is as great a coward as yourself?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p51">"Forgive me, I thought you were like me."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p52">"Of course, I ought to have guessed," Ivan said in agitation; "and
						
						I did guess there was some mischief brewing on your part... only you
						
						are lying, you are lying again," he cried, suddenly recollecting.
						
						"Do you remember how you went up to the carriage and said to me, 'It's
						
						always worth while speaking to a clever man'? So you were glad I
						
						went away, since you praised me?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p53">Smerdyakov sighed again and again. A trace of colour came into his
						
						face.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p54">"If I was pleased," he articulated rather breathlessly, "it was
						
						simply because you agreed not to go to Moscow, but to Tchermashnya.
						
						For it was nearer, anyway. Only when I said these words to you, it was
						
						not by way of praise, but of reproach. You didn't understand it."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p55">"What reproach?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p56">"Why, that foreseeing such a calamity you deserted your own
						
						father, and would not protect us, for I might have been taken up any
						
						time for stealing that three thousand."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p57">"Damn you!" Ivan swore again. "Stay, did you tell the prosecutor
						
						and the investigating lawyer about those knocks?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p58">"I told them everything just as it was."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p59">Ivan wondered inwardly again.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p60">"If I thought of anything then," he began again, "it was solely of
						
						some wickedness on your part. Dmitri might kill him, but that he would
						
						steal- I did not believe that then.... But I was prepared for any
						
						wickedness from you. You told me yourself you could sham a fit. What
						
						did you say that for?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p61">"It was just through my simplicity, and I never have shammed a fit
						
						on purpose in my life. And I only said so then to boast to you. It was
						
						just foolishness. I liked you so much then, and was open-hearted
						
						with you."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p62">"My brother directly accuses you of the murder and theft."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p63">"What else is left for him to do?" said Smerdyakov, with a
						
						bitter grin. "And who will believe him with all the proofs against
						
						him? Grigory Vassilyevitch saw the door open. What can he say after
						
						that? But never mind him! He is trembling to save himself."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p64">He slowly ceased speaking; then suddenly, as though on reflection,
						
						added:
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p65">"And look here again. He wants to throw it on me and make out that
						
						it is the work of my hands- I've heard that already. But as to my
						
						being clever at shamming a fit: should I have told you beforehand that
						
						I could sham one, if I really had had such a design against your
						
						father? If I had been planning such a murder could I have been such
						
						a fool as to give such evidence against myself beforehand? And to
						
						his son, too! Upon my word! Is that likely? As if that could be;
						
						such a thing has never happened. No one hears this talk of ours now,
						
						except Providence itself, and if you were to tell of it to the
						
						prosecutor and Nikolay Parfenovitch you might defend me completely
						
						by doing so, for who would be likely to be such a criminal, if he is
						
						so open-hearted beforehand? Anyone can see that."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p66">"Well," and Ivan got up to cut short the conversation, struck by
						
						Smerdyakov's last argument. "I don't suspect you at all, and I think
						
						it's absurd, indeed, to suspect you. On the contrary, I am grateful to
						
						you for setting my mind at rest. Now I am going, but I'll come
						
						again. Meanwhile, good-bye. Get well. Is there anything you want?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p67">"I am very thankful for everything. Marfa Ignatyevna does not
						
						forget me, and provides me anything I want, according to her kindness.
						
						Good people visit me every day."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p68">"Good-bye. But I shan't say anything of your being able to sham
						
						a fit, and I don't advise you to, either," something made Ivan say
						
						suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p69">"I quite understand. And if you don't speak of that, I shall say
						
						nothing of that conversation of ours at the gate."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p70">Then it happened that Ivan went out, and only when he had gone a
						
						dozen steps along the corridor, he suddenly felt that there was an
						
						insulting significance in Smerdyakov's last words. He was almost on
						
						the point of turning back, but it was only a passing impulse, and
						
						muttering, "Nonsense!" he went out of the hospital.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p71">His chief feeling was one of relief at the fact that it was not
						
						Smerdyakov, but Mitya, who had committed the murder, though he might
						
						have been expected to feel the opposite. He did not want to analyse
						
						the reason for this feeling, and even felt a positive repugnance at
						
						prying into his sensations. He felt as though he wanted to make
						
						haste to forget something. In the following days he became convinced
						
						of Mitya's guilt, as he got to know all the weight of evidence against
						
						him. There was evidence of people of no importance, Fenya and her
						
						mother, for instance, but the effect of it was almost overpowering. As
						
						to Perhotin, the people at the tavern, and at Plotnikov's shop, as
						
						well as the witnesses at Mokroe, their evidence seemed conclusive.
						
						It was the details that were so damning. The secret of the knocks
						
						impressed the lawyers almost as much as Grigory's evidence as to the
						
						open door. Grigory's wife, Marfa, in answer to Ivan's questions,
						
						declared that Smerdyakov had been lying all night the other side of
						
						the partition wall, "He was not three paces from our bed," and that
						
						although she was a sound sleeper she waked several times and heard him
						
						moaning, "He was moaning the whole time, moaning continually."
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p72">Talking to Herzenstube, and giving it as his opinion that
						
						Smerdyakov was not mad, but only rather weak, Ivan only evoked from
						
						the old man a subtle smile.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p73">"Do you know how he spends his time now?" he asked; "learning
						
						lists of French words by heart. He has an exercise-book under his
						
						pillow with the French words written out in Russian letters for him by
						
						someone, he he he!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p74">Ivan ended by dismissing all doubts. He could not think of
						
						Dmitri without repulsion. Only one thing was strange, however. Alyosha
						
						persisted that Dmitri was not the murderer, and that "in all
						
						probability" Smerdyakov was. Ivan always felt that Alyosha's opinion
						
						meant a great deal to him, and so he was astonished at it now. Another
						
						thing that was strange was that Alyosha did not make any attempt to
						
						talk about Mitya with Ivan, that he never began on the subject and
						
						only answered his questions. This, too, struck Ivan particularly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p75">But he was very much preoccupied at that time with something quite
						
						apart from that. On his return from Moscow, he abandoned himself
						
						hopelessly to his mad and consuming passion for Katerina Ivanovna.
						
						This is not the time to begin to speak of this new passion of
						
						Ivan's, which left its mark on all the rest of his life: this would
						
						furnish the subject for another novel, which I may perhaps never
						
						write. But I cannot omit to mention here that when Ivan, on leaving
						
						Katerina Ivanovna with Alyosha, as I've related already, told him,
						
						"I am not keen on her," it was an absolute lie: he loved her madly,
						
						though at times he hated her so that he might have murdered her.
						
						Many causes helped to bring about this feeling. Shattered by what
						
						had happened with Mitya, she rushed on Ivan's return to meet him as
						
						her one salvation. She was hurt, insulted and humiliated in her
						
						feelings. And here the man had come back to her, who had loved her
						
						so ardently before (oh! she knew that very well), and whose heart
						
						and intellect she considered so superior to her own. But the sternly
						
						virtuous girl did not abandon herself altogether to the man she loved,
						
						in spite of the Karamazov violence of his passions and the great
						
						fascination he had for her. She was continually tormented at the
						
						same time by remorse for having deserted Mitya, and in moments of
						
						discord and violent anger (and they were numerous) she told Ivan so
						
						plainly. This was what he had called to Alyosha "lies upon lies."
						
						There was, of course, much that was false in it, and that angered Ivan
						
						more than anything.... But of all this later.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p76">He did, in fact, for a time almost forget Smerdyakov's
						
						existence, and yet, a fortnight after his first visit to him, he began
						
						to be haunted by the same strange thoughts as before. It's enough to
						
						say that he was continually asking himself, why was it that on that
						
						last night in Fyodor Pavlovitch's house he had crept out on to the
						
						stairs like a thief and listened to hear what his father was doing
						
						below? Why had he recalled that afterwards with repulsion? Why next
						
						morning, had he been suddenly so depressed on the journey? Why, as
						
						he reached Moscow, had he said to himself, "I am a scoundrel"? And now
						
						he almost fancied that these tormenting thoughts would make him even
						
						forget Katerina Ivanovna, so completely did they take possession of
						
						him again. It was just after fancying this, that he met Alyosha in the
						
						street. He stopped him at once, and put a question to him:
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p77">"Do you remember when Dmitri burst in after dinner and beat
						
						father, and afterwards I told you in the yard that I reserved 'the
						
						right to desire'?... Tell me, did you think then that I desired
						
						father's death or not?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p78">"I did think so," answered Alyosha, softly.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p79">"It was so, too; it was not a matter of guessing. But didn't you
						
						fancy then that what I wished was just that one reptile should
						
						devour another'; that is, just that Dmitri should kill father, and
						
						as soon as possible... and that I myself was even prepared to help
						
						to bring that about?"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p80">Alyosha turned rather pale, and looked silently into his brother's
						
						face.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p81">"Speak!" cried Ivan, "I want above everything to know what you
						
						thought then. I want the truth, the truth!"
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p82">He drew a deep breath, looking angrily at Alyosha before his
						
						answer came.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p83">"Forgive me, I did think that, too, at the time," whispered
						
						Alyosha, and he did not add one softening phrase.
						
							</p><p id="vi_7-p84">"Thanks," snapped Ivan, and, leaving Alyosha, he went quickly on
						
						his way. From that time Alyosha noticed that Ivan began obviously to
						
						avoid him and seemed even to have taken a dislike to him, so much so
						
						that Alyosha gave up going to see him. Immediately after that
						
						meeting with him, Ivan had not gone home, but went straight to
						
						Smerdyakov again.</p>					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - The Second Visit to Smerdyakov" prev="vi_7" next="viii_4" id="vii_7">
					
					
							<p id="vii_7-p1">BY that time Smerdyakov had been discharged from the hospital.
						
						Ivan knew his new lodging, the dilapidated little wooden house,
						
						divided in two by a passage, on one side of which lived Marya
						
						Kondratyevna and her mother, and on the other, Smerdyakov. No one knew
						
						on what terms he lived with them, whether as a friend or as a
						
						lodger. It was supposed afterwards that he had come to stay with
						
						them as Marya Kondratyevna's betrothed, and was living there for a
						
						time without paying for board or lodging. Both mother and daughter had
						
						the greatest respect for him and looked upon him as greatly superior
						
						to themselves.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p2">Ivan knocked, and, on the door being opened, went straight into
						
						the passage. By Marya Kondratyevna's directions he went straight to
						
						the better room on the left, occupied by Smerdyakov. There was a tiled
						
						stove in the room and it was extremely hot. The walls were gay with
						
						blue paper, which was a good deal used however, and in the cracks
						
						under it cockroaches swarmed in amazing numbers, so that there was a
						
						continual rustling from them. The furniture was very scanty: two
						
						benches against each wall and two chairs by the table. The table of
						
						plain wood was covered with a cloth with pink patterns on it. There
						
						was a pot of geranium on each of the two little windows. In the corner
						
						there was a case of ikons. On the table stood a little copper
						
						samovar with many dents in it, and a tray with two cups. But
						
						Smerdyakov had finished tea and the samovar was out. He was sitting at
						
						the table on a bench. He was looking at an exercise-book and slowly
						
						writing with a pen. There was a bottle of ink by him and a flat iron
						
						candlestick, but with a composite candle. Ivan saw at once from
						
						Smerdyakov's face that he had completely recovered from his illness.
						
						His face was fresher, fuller, his hair stood up jauntily in front, and
						
						was plastered down at the sides. He was sitting in a parti-coloured,
						
						wadded dressing-gown, rather dirty and frayed, however. He had
						
						spectacles on his nose, which Ivan had never seen him wearing
						
						before. This trifling circumstance suddenly redoubled Ivan's anger: "A
						
						creature like that and wearing spectacles!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p3">Smerdyakov slowly raised his head and looked intently at his
						
						visitor through his spectacles; then he slowly took them off and
						
						rose from the bench, but by no means respectfully, almost lazily,
						
						doing the least possible required by common civility. All this
						
						struck Ivan instantly; he took it all in and noted it at once- most of
						
						all the look in Smerdyakov's eyes, positively malicious, churlish
						
						and haughty. "What do you want to intrude for?" it seemed to say;
						
						"we settled everything then; why have you come again?" Ivan could
						
						scarcely control himself.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p4">"It's hot here," he said, still standing, and unbuttoned his
						
						overcoat.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p5">"Take off your coat," Smerdyakov conceded.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p6">Ivan took off his coat and threw it on a bench with trembling
						
						hands. He took a chair, moved it quickly to the table and sat down.
						
						Smerdyakov managed to sit down on his bench before him.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p7">"To begin with, are we alone?" Ivan asked sternly and impulsively.
						
						"Can they overhear us in there?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p8">"No one can hear anything. You've seen for yourself: there's a
						
						passage."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p9">"Listen, my good fellow; what was that you babbled, as I was
						
						leaving the hospital, that if I said nothing about your faculty of
						
						shamming fits, you wouldn't tell the investigating lawyer all our
						
						conversation at the gate? What do you mean by all? What could you mean
						
						by it? Were you threatening me? Have I entered into some sort of
						
						compact with you? Do you suppose I am afraid of you?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p10">Ivan said this in a perfect fury, giving him to understand with
						
						obvious intention that he scorned any subterfuge or indirectness and
						
						meant to show his cards. Smerdyakov's eyes gleamed resentfully, his
						
						left eye winked, and he at once gave his answer, with his habitual
						
						composure and deliberation. "You want to have everything
						
						above-board; very well, you shall have it," he seemed to say.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p11">"This is what I meant then, and this is why I said that, that you,
						
						knowing beforehand of this murder of your own parent, left him to
						
						his fate, and that people mightn't after that conclude any evil
						
						about your feelings and perhaps of something else, too- that's what
						
						I promised not to tell the authorities."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p12">Though Smerdyakov spoke without haste and obviously controlling
						
						himself, yet there was something in his voice, determined and
						
						emphatic, resentful and insolently defiant. He stared impudently at
						
						Ivan. A mist passed before Ivan's eyes for the first moment.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p13">"How? What? Are you out of your mind?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p14">"I'm perfectly in possession of all my faculties."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p15">"Do you suppose I knew of the murder?" Ivan cried at last, and
						
						he brought his fist violently on the table. "What do you mean by
						
						'something else, too'? Speak, scoundrel!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p16">Smerdyakov was silent and still scanned Ivan with the same
						
						insolent stare.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p17">"Speak, you stinking rogue, what is that 'something else, too'?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p18">"The 'something else' I meant was that you probably, too, were
						
						very desirous of your parent's death."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p19">Ivan jumped up and struck him with all his might on the
						
						shoulder, so that he fell back against the wall. In an instant his
						
						face was bathed in tears. Saying, "It's a shame, sir, to strike a sick
						
						man," he dried his eyes with a very dirty blue check handkerchief
						
						and sank into quiet weeping. A minute passed.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p20">"That's enough! Leave off," Ivan said peremptorily, sitting down
						
						again. "Don't put me out of all patience."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p21">Smerdyakov took the rag from his eyes. Every line of his
						
						puckered face reflected the insult he had just received.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p22">"So you thought then, you scoundrel, that together with Dmitri I
						
						meant to kill my father?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p23">"I didn't know what thoughts were in your mind then," said
						
						Smerdyakov resentfully; "and so I stopped you then at the gate to
						
						sound you on that very point."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p24">"To sound what, what?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p25">"Why, that very circumstance, whether you wanted your father to be
						
						murdered or not."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p26">What infuriated Ivan more than anything was the aggressive,
						
						insolent tone to which Smerdyakov persistently adhered.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p27">"It was you murdered him?" he cried suddenly.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p28">Smerdyakov smiled contemptuously.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p29">"You know of yourself, for a fact, that it wasn't I murdered
						
						him. And I should have thought that there was no need for a sensible
						
						man to speak of it again."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p30">"But why, why had you such a suspicion about me at the time?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p31">"As you know already, it was simply from fear. For I was in such a
						
						position, shaking with fear, that I suspected everyone. I resolved
						
						to sound you, too, for I thought if you wanted the same as your
						
						brother, then the business was as good as settled and I should be
						
						crushed like a fly, too."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p32">"Look here, you didn't say that a fortnight ago."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p33">"I meant the same when I talked to you in the hospital, only I
						
						thought you'd understand without wasting words, and that being such
						
						a sensible man you wouldn't care to talk of it openly."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p34">"What next! Come answer, answer, I insist: what was it... what
						
						could I have done to put such a degrading suspicion into your mean
						
						soul?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p35">"As for the murder, you couldn't have done that and didn't want
						
						to, but as for wanting someone else to do it, that was just what you
						
						did want."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p36">"And how coolly, how coolly he speakst But why should I have
						
						wanted it; what grounds had I for wanting it?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p37">"What grounds had you? What about the inheritance?" said
						
						Smerdyakov sarcastically, and, as it were, vindictively. "Why, after
						
						your parent's death there was at least forty thousand to come to
						
						each of you, and very likely more, but if Fyodor Pavlovitch got
						
						married then to that lady, Agrafena Alexandrovna, she would have had
						
						all his capital made over to her directly after the wedding, for she's
						
						plenty of sense, so that your parent would not have left you two
						
						roubles between the three of you. And were they far from a wedding,
						
						either? Not a hair's-breadth: that lady had only to lift her little
						
						finger and he would have run after her to church, with his tongue
						
						out."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p38">Ivan restrained himself with painful effort.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p39">"Very good," he commented at last. "You see, I haven't jumped
						
						up, I haven't knocked you down, I haven't killed you. Speak on. So,
						
						according to you, I had fixed on Dmitri to do it; I was reckoning on
						
						him?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p40">"How could you help reckoning on him? If he killed him, then he
						
						would lose all the rights of a nobleman, his rank and property, and
						
						would go off to exile; so his share of the inheritance would come to
						
						you and your brother Alexey Fyodorovitch in equal parts; so you'd each
						
						have not forty, but sixty thousand each. There's not a doubt you did
						
						reckon on Dmitri Fyodorovitch."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p41">"What I put up with from you! Listen, scoundrel, if I had reckoned
						
						on anyone then, it would have been on you, not on Dmitri, and I
						
						swear I did expect some wickedness from you... at the time.... I
						
						remember my impression!
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p42">"I thought, too, for a minute, at the time, that you were
						
						reckoning on me as well," said Smerdyakov, with a sarcastic grin.
						
						"So that it was just by that more than anything you showed me what was
						
						in your mind. For if you had a foreboding about me and yet went
						
						away, you as good as said to me, 'You can murder my parent, I won't
						
						hinder you!"'
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p43">"You scoundrel! So that's how you understood it!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p44">"It was all that going to Tchermashnya. Why! You were meaning to
						
						go to Moscow and refused all your father's entreaties to go to
						
						Tchermashnya- and simply at a foolish word from me you consented at
						
						once! What reason had you to consent to Tchermashnya? Since you went
						
						to Tchermashnya with no reason, simply at my word, it shows that you
						
						must have expected something from me."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p45">No, I swear I didn't!" shouted Ivan, grinding his teeth.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p46">"You didn't? Then you ought, as your father's son, to have had
						
						me taken to the lock-up and thrashed at once for my words then... or
						
						at least, to have given me a punch in the face on the spot, but you
						
						were not a bit angry, if you please, and at once in a friendly way
						
						acted on my foolish word and went away, which was utterly absurd,
						
						for you ought to have stayed to save your parent's life. How could I
						
						help drawing my conclusions?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p47">Ivan sat scowling, both his fists convulsively pressed on his
						
						knees.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p48">"Yes, I am sorry I didn't punch you in the face," he said with a
						
						bitter smile. "I couldn't have taken you to the lock-up just then. Who
						
						would have believed me and what charge could I bring against you?
						
						But the punch in the face... oh, I'm sorry I didn't think of it.
						
						Though blows are forbidden, I should have pounded your ugly face to
						
						a jelly."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p49">Smerdyakov looked at him almost with relish.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p50">"In the ordinary occasions of life," he said in the same
						
						complacent and sententious tone in which he had taunted Grigory and
						
						argued with him about religion at Fyodor Pavlovitch's table, "in the
						
						ordinary occasions of life, blows on the face are forbidden nowadays
						
						by law, and people have given them up, but in exceptional occasions of
						
						life people still fly to blows, not only among us but all over the
						
						world, be it even the fullest republic of France, just as in the
						
						time of Adam and Eve, and they never will leave off, but you, even
						
						in an exceptional case, did not dare."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p51">"What are you learning French words for?" Ivan nodded towards
						
						the exercise-book lying on the table.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p52">"Why shouldn't I learn them so as to improve my education,
						
						supposing that I may myself chance to go some day to those happy parts
						
						of Europe?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p53">"Listen, monster." Ivan's eyes flashed and he trembled all over.
						
						"I am not afraid of your accusations; you can say what you like
						
						about me, and if I don't beat you to death, it's simply because I
						
						suspect you of that crime and I'll drag you to justice. I'll unmask
						
						you."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p54">"To my thinking, you'd better keep quiet, for what can you
						
						accuse me of, considering my absolute innocence? And who would believe
						
						you? Only if you begin, I shall tell everything, too, for I must
						
						defend myself."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p55">"Do you think I am afraid of you now?"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p56">"If the court doesn't believe all I've said to you just now, the
						
						public will, and you will be ashamed."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p57">"That's as much as to say, 'It's always worth while speaking to
						
						a sensible man,' eh?" snarled Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p58">"You hit the mark, indeed. And you'd better be sensible."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p59">Ivan got up, shaking all over with indignation, put on his coat,
						
						and without replying further to Smerdyakov, without even looking at
						
						him, walked quickly out of the cottage. The cool evening air refreshed
						
						him. There was a bright moon in the sky. A nightmare of ideas and
						
						sensations filled his soul. "Shall I go at once and give information
						
						against Smerdyakov? But what information can I give? He is not guilty,
						
						anyway. On the contrary, he'll accuse me. And in fact, why did I set
						
						off for Tchermashnya then? What for? What for?" Ivan asked himself.
						
						"Yes, of course, I was expecting something and he is right... " And he
						
						remembered for the hundredth time how, on the last night in his
						
						father's house, he had listened on the stairs. But he remembered it
						
						now with such anguish that he stood still on the spot as though he had
						
						been stabbed. "Yes, I expected it then, that's true! I wanted the
						
						murder, I did want the murder! Did I want the murder? Did I want it? I
						
						must kill Smerdyakov! If I don't dare kill Smerdyakov now, life is not
						
						worth living!"
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p60">Ivan did not go home, but went straight to Katerina Ivanovna and
						
						alarmed her by his appearance. He was like a madman. He repeated all
						
						his conversation with Smerdyakov, every syllable of it. He couldn't be
						
						calmed, however much she tried to soothe him: he kept walking about
						
						the room, speaking strangely, disconnectedly. At last he sat down, put
						
						his elbows on the table, leaned his head on his hands and pronounced
						
						this strange sentence: "If it's not Dmitri, but Smerdyakov who's the
						
						murderer, I share his guilt, for I put him up to it. Whether I did,
						
						I don't know yet. But if he is the murderer, and not Dmitri, then,
						
						of course, I am the murderer, too."
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p61">When Katerina Ivanovna heard that, she got up from her seat
						
						without a word, went to her writing-table, opened a box standing on
						
						it, took out a sheet of paper and laid it before Ivan. This was the
						
						document of which Ivan spoke to Alyosha later on as a "conclusive
						
						proof" that Dmitri had killed his father. It was the letter written by
						
						Mitya to Katerina Ivanovna when he was drunk, on the very evening he
						
						met Alyosha at the crossroads on the way to the monastery, after the
						
						scene at Katerina Ivanovna's, when Grushenka had insulted her. Then,
						
						parting from Alyosha, Mitya had rushed to Grushenka. I don't know
						
						whether he saw her, but in the evening he was at the Metropolis, where
						
						he got thoroughly drunk. Then he asked for pen and paper and wrote a
						
						document of weighty consequences to himself. It was a wordy,
						
						disconnected, frantic letter, a drunken letter, in fact. It was like
						
						the talk of a drunken man, who, on his return home, begins with
						
						extraordinary heat telling his wife or one of his household how he has
						
						just been insulted, what a rascal had just insulted him, what a fine
						
						fellow he is on the other hand, and how he will pay that scoundrel
						
						out; and all that at great length, with great excitement and
						
						incoherence, with drunken tears and blows on the table. The letter was
						
						written on a dirty piece of ordinary paper of the cheapest kind. It
						
						had been provided by the tavern and there were figures scrawled on the
						
						back of it. There was evidently not space enough for his drunken
						
						verbosity and Mitya not only filled the margins but had written the
						
						last line right across the rest. The letter ran as follows:
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p62">FATAL KATYA: To-morrow I will get the money and repay your three
						
						thousand and farewell, woman of great wrath, but farewell, too, my
						
						love! Let us make an end! To-morrow I shall try and get it from
						
						everyone, and if I can't borrow it, I give you my word of honour I
						
						shall go to my father and break his skull and take the money from
						
						under the pillow, if only Ivan has gone. It I have to go to Siberia
						
						for it, I'll give you back your three thousand. And farewell. I bow
						
						down to the ground before you, for I've been a scoundrel to you.
						
						Forgive me! No, better not forgive  me, you'll be happier and so shall
						
						I! Better Siberia than your love, for I love another woman and you got
						
						to know her too well to-day, so how can you forgive? I will murder the
						
						man who's robbed me! I'll leave you all and go to the East so as to
						
						see no one again. Not her either, for you are not my only tormentress;
						
						she is too. Farewel!
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p63">P.S.- I write my curse, but I adore you! I hear it in my heart.
						
						One string is left, and it vibrates. Better tear my heart in two! I
						
						shall kill myself, but first of all that cur. I shall tear three
						
						thousand from him and fling it to you. Though I've been a scoundrel to
						
						you, I am not a thief! You can expect three thousand. The cur keeps it
						
						under his mattress, in pink ribbon. I am not a thief, but I'll
						
						murder my thief. Katya, don't look disdainful. Dmitri is not a
						
						thief! but a murderer! He has murdered his father and ruined himself
						
						to hold his ground, rather than endure your pride. And he doesn't love
						
						you.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p64" /><p id="vii_7-p65">P.P.S.- I kiss your feet, farewel!
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p66" /><p id="vii_7-p67">P.P.P.S.- Katya, pray to God that someone'll give me the money.
						
						Then I shall not be steeped in gore, and if no one does- I shall! Kill
						
						me!
						
						</p><p id="vii_7-p68" /><p id="vii_7-p69">                                      Your slave and enemy,
						
						</p><p id="vii_7-p70" /><p id="vii_7-p71">                                                 D. KARAMAZOV
						
						
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p72">When Ivan read this "document" he was convinced. So then it was
						
						his brother, not Smerdyakov. And if not Smerdyakov, then not he, Ivan.
						
						This letter at once assumed in his eyes the aspect of a logical proof.
						
						There could be no longer the slightest doubt of Mitya's guilt. The
						
						suspicion never occurred to Ivan, by the way, that Mitya might have
						
						committed the murder in conjunction with Smerdyakov, and, indeed, such
						
						a theory did not fit in with the facts. Ivan was completely reassured.
						
						The next morning he only thought of Smerdyakov and his gibes with
						
						contempt. A few days later he positively wondered how he could have
						
						been so horribly distressed at his suspicions. He resolved to
						
						dismiss him with contempt and forget him. So passed a month. He made
						
						no further inquiry about Smerdyakov, but twice he happened to hear
						
						that he was very ill and out of his mind.
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p73">"He'll end in madness," the young doctor Varvinsky observed
						
						about him, and Ivan remembered this. During the last week of that
						
						month Ivan himself began to feel very ill. He went to consult the
						
						Moscow doctor who had been sent for by Katerina Ivanovna just before
						
						the trial. And just at that time his relations with Katerina
						
						Ivanovna became acutely strained. They were like two enemies in love
						
						with one another. Katerina Ivanovna's "returns" to Mitya, that is, her
						
						brief but violent revulsions of feeling in his favour, drove Ivan to
						
						perfect frenzy. Strange to say, until that last scene described above,
						
						when Alyosha came from Mitya to Katerina Ivanovna, Ivan had never
						
						once, during that month, heard her express a doubt of Mitya's guilt,
						
						in spite of those "returns" that were so hateful to him. It is
						
						remarkable, too, that while he felt that he hated Mitya more and
						
						more every day, he realised that it was not on account of Katya's
						
						"returns" that he hated him, but just because he was the murderer of
						
						his father. He was conscious of this and fully recognised it to
						
						himself
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p74">Nevertheless, he went to see Mitya ten days before the trial and
						
						proposed to him a plan of escape- a plan he had obviously thought over
						
						a long time. He was partly impelled to do this by a sore place still
						
						left in his heart from a phrase of Smerdyakov's, that it was to his,
						
						Ivan's, advantage that his brother should be convicted, as that
						
						would increase his inheritance and Alyosha's from forty to sixty
						
						thousand roubles. He determined to sacrifice thirty thousand on
						
						arranging Mitya's escape. On his return from seeing him, he was very
						
						mournful and dispirited; he suddenly began to feel that he was anxious
						
						for Mitya's escape, not only to heal that sore place by sacrificing
						
						thirty thousand, but for another reason. "Is it because I am as much a
						
						murderer at heart?" he asked himself. Something very deep down
						
						seemed burning and rankling in his soul. His pride above all
						
						suffered cruelly all that month. But of that later....
						
							</p><p id="vii_7-p75">When, after his conversation with Alyosha, Ivan suddenly decided
						
						with his hand on the bell of his lodging to go to Smerdyakov, he
						
						obeyed a sudden and peculiar impulse of indignation. He suddenly
						
						remembered how Katerina Ivanovna had only just cried out to him in
						
						Alyosha's presence: "It was you, you, persuaded me of his" (that is,
						
						Mitya's) "guilt!" Ivan was thunderstruck when he recalled it. He had
						
						never once tried to persuade her that Mitya was the murderer; on the
						
						contrary, he had suspected himself in her presence, that time when
						
						he came back from Smerdyakov. It was she, she, who had produced that
						
						"document" and proved his brother's guilt. And now she suddenly
						
						exclaimed: "I've been at Smerdyakov's myself!" When had she been
						
						there? Ivan had known nothing of it. So she was not at all so sure
						
						of Mitya's guilt! And what could Smerdyakov have told her? What, what,
						
						had he said to her? His heart burned with violent anger. He could
						
						not understand how he could, half an hour before, have let those words
						
						pass and not have cried out at the moment. He let go of the bell and
						
						rushed off to Smerdyakov. "I shall kill him, perhaps, this time," he
						
						thought on the way.</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 8 - The Third and Last Interview with Smerdyakov" prev="vii_7" next="ix_2" id="viii_4">
					
							<p id="viii_4-p1">WHEN he was half-way there, the keen dry wind that had been
						
						blowing early that morning rose again, and a fine dry snow began
						
						falling thickly. It did not lie on the ground, but was whirled about
						
						by the wind, and soon there was a regular snowstorm. There were
						
						scarcely any lamp-posts in the part of the town where Smerdyakov
						
						lived. Ivan strode alone in the darkness, unconscious of the storm,
						
						instinctively picking out his way. His head ached and there was a
						
						painful throbbing in his temples. He felt that his hands were
						
						twitching convulsively. Not far from Marya Kondratyevna's cottage,
						
						Ivan suddenly came upon a solitary drunken little peasant. He was
						
						wearing a coarse and patched coat, and was walking in zigzags,
						
						grumbling and swearing to himself. Then suddenly he would begin
						
						singing in a husky drunken voice:
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_4-p2" /><p id="viii_4-p3">                 Ach, Vanka's gone to Petersburg;
						
						</p><p id="viii_4-p4">                   I won't wait till he comes back.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p5" /><p id="viii_4-p6">But he broke off every time at the second line and began
						
						swearing again; then he would begin the same song again. Ivan felt
						
						an intense hatred for him before he had thought about him at all.
						
						Suddenly he realised his presence and felt an irresistible impulse
						
						to knock him down. At that moment they met, and the peasant with a
						
						violent lurch fell full tilt against Ivan, who pushed him back
						
						furiously. The peasant went flying backwards and fell like a log on
						
						the frozen ground. He uttered one plaintive "O- oh!" and then was
						
						silent. Ivan stepped up to him. He was lying on his back, without
						
						movement or consciousness. "He will be frozen," thought Ivan, and he
						
						went on his way to Smerdyakov's.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p7">In the passage, Marya Kondratyevna, who ran out to open the door
						
						with a candle in her hand, whispered that Smerdyakov was very ill;
						
						"It's not that he's laid up, but he seems not himself, and he even
						
						told us to take the tea away; he wouldn't have any."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p8">"Why, does he make a row?" asked Ivan coarsely.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p9">"Oh dear no, quite the contrary, he's very quiet. Only please
						
						don't talk to him too long," Marya Kondratyevna begged him. Ivan
						
						opened the door and stepped into the room.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p10">It was over-heated as before, but there were changes in the
						
						room. One of the benches at the side had been removed, and in its
						
						place had been put a large old mahogany leather sofa, on which a bed
						
						had been made up, with fairly clean white pillows. Smerdyakov was
						
						sitting on the sofa, wearing the same dressing-gown. The table had
						
						been brought out in front of the sofa, so that there was hardly room
						
						to move. On the table lay a thick book in yellow cover, but Smerdyakov
						
						was not reading it. He seemed to be sitting doing nothing. He met Ivan
						
						with a slow silent gaze, and was apparently not at all surprised at
						
						his coming. There was a great change in his face; he was much
						
						thinner and sallower. His eyes were sunken and there were blue marks
						
						under them.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p11">"Why, you really are ill?" Ivan stopped short. "I won't keep you
						
						long, I wont even take off my coat. Where can one sit down?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p12">He went to the other end of the table, moved up a chair and sat
						
						down on it.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p13">"Why do you look at me without speaking? We only come with one
						
						question, and I swear I won't go without an answer. Has the young
						
						lady, Katerina Ivanovna, been with you?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p14">Smerdyakov still remained silent, looking quietly at Ivan as
						
						before. Suddenly, with a motion of his hand, he turned his face away.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p15">"What's the matter with you?" cried Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p16">"Nothing."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p17">"What do you mean by 'nothing'?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p18">"Yes, she has. It's no matter to you. Let me alone."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p19">"No, I won't let you alone. Tell me, when was she here?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p20">"Why, I'd quite forgotten about her," said Smerdyakov, with a
						
						scornful smile, and turning his face to Ivan again, he stared at him
						
						with a look of frenzied hatred, the same look that he had fixed on him
						
						at their last interview, a month before.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p21">"You seem very ill yourself, your face is sunken; you don't look
						
						like yourself," he said to Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p22">"Never mind my health, tell me what I ask you.,
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p23">"But why are your eyes so yellow? The whites are quite yellow. Are
						
						you so worried?" He smiled contemptuously and suddenly laughed
						
						outright.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p24">"Listen; I've told you I won't go away without an answer!" Ivan
						
						cried, intensely irritated.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p25">"Why do you keep pestering me? Why do you torment me?" said
						
						Smerdyakov, with a look of suffering.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p26">"Damn it! I've nothing to do with you. Just answer my question and
						
						I'll go away."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p27">"I've no answer to give you," said Smerdyakov, looking down again.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p28">"You may be sure I'll make you answer!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p29">"Why are you so uneasy?" Smerdyakov stared at him, not simply with
						
						contempt, but almost with repulsion. "Is this because the trial begins
						
						to-morrow? Nothing will happen to you; can't you believe that at last?
						
						Go home, go to bed and sleep in peace, don't be afraid of anything."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p30">"I don't understand you.... What have I to be afraid of
						
						to-morrow?" Ivan articulated in astonishment, and suddenly a chill
						
						breath of fear did in fact pass over his soul. Smerdyakov measured him
						
						with his eyes.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p31">"You don't understand?" he drawled reproachfully. "It's a
						
						strange thing a sensible man should care to play such a farce!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p32">Ivan looked at him speechless. The startling, incredibly
						
						supercilious tone of this man who had once been his valet, was
						
						extraordinary in itself. He had not taken such a tone even at their
						
						last interview.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p33">"I tell you, you've nothing to be afraid of. I won't say
						
						anything about you; there's no proof against you. I say, how your
						
						hands are trembling! Why are your fingers moving like that? Go home,
						
						you did not murder him."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p34">Ivan started. He remembered Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p35">"I know it was not I," he faltered.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p36">"Do you?" Smerdyakov caught him up again.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p37">Ivan jumped up and seized him by the shoulder.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p38">"Tell me everything, you viper! Tell me everything!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p39">Smerdyakov was not in the least scared. He only riveted his eyes
						
						on Ivan with insane hatred.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p40">"Well, it was you who murdered him, if that's it," he whispered
						
						furiously.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p41">Ivan sank back on his chair, as though pondering something. He
						
						laughed malignantly.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p42">"You mean my going away. What you talked about last time?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p43">"You stood before me last time and understood it all, and you
						
						understand it now."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p44">"All I understand is that you are mad."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p45">"Aren't you tired of it? Here we are face to face; what's the
						
						use of going on keeping up a farce to each other? Are you still trying
						
						to throw it all on me, to my face? You murdered him; you are the
						
						real murderer, I was only your instrument, your faithful servant,
						
						and it was following your words I did it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p46">"Did it? Why, did you murder him?" Ivan turned cold.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p47">Something seemed to give way in his brain, and he shuddered all
						
						over with a cold shiver. Then Smerdyakov himself looked at him
						
						wonderingly; probably the genuineness of Ivan's horror struck him.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p48">"You don't mean to say you really did not know?" he faltered
						
						mistrustfully, looking with a forced smile into his eyes. Ivan still
						
						gazed at him, and seemed unable to speak.
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_4-p49" /><p id="viii_4-p50">                 Ach, Vanka's gone to Petersburg;
						
						</p><p id="viii_4-p51">                   I won't wait till he comes back,
						
						
						
						</p><p id="viii_4-p52" /><p id="viii_4-p53">suddenly echoed in his head.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p54">"Do you know, I am afraid that you are a dream, a phantom
						
						sitting before me," he muttered.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p55">"There's no phantom here, but only us two and one other. No
						
						doubt he is here, that third, between us."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p56">"Who is he? Who is here? What third person?" Ivan cried in
						
						alarm, looking about him, his eyes hastily searching in every corner.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p57">"That third is God Himself- Providence. He is the third beside
						
						us now. Only don't look for Him, you won't find him."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p58">"It's a lie that you killed him!" Ivan cried madly. "You are
						
						mad, or teasing me again!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p59">Smerdyakov, as before, watched him curiously, with no sign of
						
						fear. He could still scarcely get over his incredulity; he still
						
						fancied that Ivan knew everything and was trying to "throw it all on
						
						him to his face."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p60">"Wait a minute," he said at last in a weak voice, and suddenly
						
						bringing up his left leg from under the table, he began turning up his
						
						trouser leg. He was wearing long white stockings and slippers.
						
						Slowly he took off his garter and fumbled to the bottom of his
						
						stocking. Ivan gazed at him, and suddenly shuddered in a paroxysm of
						
						terror.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p61">"He's mad!" he cried, and rapidly jumping up, he drew back, so
						
						that he knocked his back against the wall and stood up against it,
						
						stiff and straight. He looked with insane terror at Smerdyakov, who,
						
						entirely unaffected by his terror, continued fumbling in his stocking,
						
						as though he were making an effort to get hold of something with his
						
						fingers and pull it out. At last he got hold of it and began pulling
						
						it out. Ivan saw that it was a piece of paper, or perhaps a roll of
						
						papers. Smerdyakov pulled it out and laid it on the table.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p62">"Here," he said quietly.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p63">"What is it?" asked Ivan, trembling.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p64">"Kindly look at it," Smerdyakov answered, still in the same low
						
						tone.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p65">Ivan stepped up to the table, took up the roll of paper and
						
						began unfolding it, but suddenly drew back his fingers, as though from
						
						contact with a loathsome reptile.
						
							"Your hands keep twitching," observed Smerdyakov, and he
						
						deliberately unfolded the bundle himself. Under the wrapper were three
						
						packets of hundred-rouble notes.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p66">"They are all here, all the three thousand roubles; you need not
						
						count them. Take them," Smerdyakov suggested to Ivan, nodding at the
						
						notes. Ivan sank back in his chair. He was as white as a handkerchief.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p67">"You frightened me... with your stocking," he said, with a strange
						
						grin.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p68">"Can you really not have known till now?" Smerdyakov asked once
						
						more.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p69">"No, I did not know. I kept thinking of Dmitri. Brother,
						
						brother! Ach!" He suddenly clutched his head in both hands.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p70">"Listen. Did you kill him alone? With my brother's help or
						
						without?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p71">"It was only with you, with your help, I killed him, and Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch is quite innocent."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p72">"All right, all right. Talk about me later. Why do I keep on
						
						trembling? I can't speak properly."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p73">"You were bold enough then. You said 'everything was lawful,'
						
						and how frightened you are now," Smerdyakov muttered in surprise.
						
						"Won't you have some lemonade? I'll ask for some at once. It's very
						
						refreshing. Only I must hide this first."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p74">And again he motioned at the notes. He was just going to get up
						
						and call at the door to Marya Kondratyevna to make some lemonade and
						
						bring it them, but, looking for something to cover up the notes that
						
						she might not see them, he first took out his handkerchief, and as
						
						it turned out to be very dirty, took up the big yellow book that
						
						Ivan had noticed at first lying on the table, and put it over the
						
						notes. The book was The Sayings of the Holy Father Isaac the Syrian.
						
						Ivan read it mechanically.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p75">"I won't have any lemonade," he said. "Talk of me later. Sit
						
						down and tell me how you did it. Tell me all about it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p76">"You'd better take off your greatcoat, or you'll be too hot."
						
						Ivan, as though he'd only just thought of it, took off his coat,
						
						and, without getting up from his chair, threw it on the bench.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p77">"Speak, please, speak."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p78">He seemed calmer. He waited, feeling sure that Smerdyakov would
						
						tell him all about it.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p79">"How it was done?" sighed Smerdyakov. "It was done in a most
						
						natural way, following your very words."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p80">"Of my words later," Ivan broke in again, apparently with complete
						
						self-possession, firmly uttering his words, and not shouting as
						
						before. "Only tell me in detail how you did it. Everything, as it
						
						happened. Don't forget anything. The details, above everything, the
						
						details, I beg you."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p81">"You'd gone away, then I fell into the cellar."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p82">"In a fit or in a sham one?"
						
						</p><p id="viii_4-p83"> "A sham one, naturally. I shammed it all. I went quietly down
						
						the steps to the very bottom and lay down quietly, and as I lay down I
						
						gave a scream, and struggled, till they carried me out."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p84">"Stay! And were you shamming all along, afterwards, and in the
						
						hospital?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p85">"No, not at all. Next day, in the morning, before they took me
						
						to the hospital, I had a real attack and a more violent one than
						
						I've had for years. For two days I was quite unconscious."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p86">"All right, all right. Go on."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p87">"They laid me on the bed. I knew I'd be the other side of the
						
						partition, for whenever I was ill, Marfa Ignatyevna used to put me
						
						there, near them. She's always been very kind to me, from my birth up.
						
						At night I moaned, but quietly. I kept expecting Dmitri Fyodorovitch
						
						to come."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p88">"Expecting him? To come to you?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p89">"Not to me. I expected him to come into the house, for I'd no
						
						doubt that he'd come that night, for being without me and getting no
						
						news, he'd be sure to come and climb over the fence, as he used to,
						
						and do something."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p90">"And if he hadn't come?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p91">"Then nothing would have happened. I should never have brought
						
						myself to it without him."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p92">"All right, all right. speak more intelligibly, don't hurry; above
						
						all, don't leave anything out!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p93">"I expected him to kill Fyodor Pavlovitch. I thought that was
						
						certain, for I had prepared him for it... during the last few days....
						
						He knew about the knocks, that was the chief thing. With his
						
						suspiciousness and the fury which had been growing in him all those
						
						days, he was bound to get into the house by means of those taps.
						
						That was inevitable, so I was expecting him."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p94">"Stay," Ivan interrupted; "if he had killed him, he would have
						
						taken the money and carried it away; you must have considered that.
						
						What would you have got by it afterwards? I don't see."
						
						    "But he would never have found the money. That was only what I
						
						told him, that the money was under the mattress. But that wasn't true.
						
						It had been lying in a box. And afterwards I suggested to Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, as I was the only person he trusted, to hide the
						
						envelope with the notes in the corner behind the ikons, for no one
						
						would have guessed that place, especially if they came in a hurry.
						
						So that's where the envelope lay, in the corner behind the ikons. It
						
						would have been absurd to keep it under the mattress; the box, anyway,
						
						could be locked. But all believe it was under the mattress. A stupid
						
						thing to believe. So if Dmitri Fyodorovitch had committed the
						
						murder, finding nothing, he would either have run away in a hurry,
						
						afraid of every sound, as always happens with murderers, or he would
						
						have been arrested. So I could always have clambered up to the ikons
						
						and have taken away the money next moming or even that night, and it
						
						would have all been put down to Dmitri Fyodorovitch. I could reckon
						
						upon that."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p95">"But what if he did not kill him, but only knocked him down?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p96">"If he did not kill him, of course, I would not have ventured to
						
						take the money, and nothing would have happened. But I calculated that
						
						he would beat him senseless, and I should have time to take it then,
						
						and then I'd make out to Fyodor Pavlovitch that it was no one but
						
						Dmitri Fyodorovitch who had taken the money after beating him."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p97">"Stop... I am getting mixed. Then it was Dmitri after all who
						
						killed him; you only took the money?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p98">"No, he didn't kill him. Well, I might as well have told you now
						
						that he was the murderer.... But I don't want to lie to you now
						
						because... because if you really haven't understood till now, as I see
						
						for myself, and are not pretending, so as to throw your guilt on me to
						
						my very face, you are still responsible for it all, since you knew
						
						of the murder and charged me to do it, and went away knowing all about
						
						it. And so I want to prove to your face this evening that you are
						
						the only real murderer in the whole affair, and I am not the real
						
						murderer, though I did kill him. You are the rightful murderer."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p99">"Why, why, am I a murderer? Oh, God!" Ivan cried, unable to
						
						restrain himself at last, and forgetting that he had put off
						
						discussing himself till the end of the conversation. "You still mean
						
						that Tchermashnya? Stay, tell me, why did you want my consent, if
						
						you really took Tchermashnya for consent? How will you explain that
						
						now?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p100">"Assured of your consent, I should have known that you wouldn't
						
						have made an outcry over those three thousand being lost, even if
						
						I'd been suspected, instead of Dmitri Fyodorovitch, or as his
						
						accomplice; on the contrary, you would have protected me from
						
						others.... And when you got your inheritance you would have rewarded
						
						me when you were able, all the rest of your life. For you'd have
						
						received your inheritance through me, seeing that if he had married
						
						Agrafena Alexandrovna, you wouldn't have had a farthing."
						
							"Ah! Then you intended to worry me all my life afterwards,"
						
						snarled Ivan. "And what if I hadn't gone away then, but had informed
						
						against you?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p101">"What could you have informed? That I persuaded you to go to
						
						Tcherinashnya? That's all nonsense. Besides, after our conversation
						
						you would either have gone away or have stayed. If you had stayed,
						
						nothing would have happened. I should have known that you didn't
						
						want it done, and should have attempted nothing. As you went away,
						
						it meant you assured me that you wouldn't dare to inform against me at
						
						the trial, and that you'd overlook my having the three thousand.
						
						And, indeed, you couldn't have prosecuted me afterwards, because
						
						then I should have told it all in the court; that is, not that I had
						
						stolen the money or killed him- I shouldn't have said that- but that
						
						you'd put me up to the theft and the murder, though I didn't consent
						
						to it. That's why I needed your consent, so that you couldn't have
						
						cornered me afterwards, for what proof could you have had? I could
						
						always have cornered you, revealing your eagerness for your father's
						
						death, and I tell you the public would have believed it all, and you
						
						would have been ashamed for the rest of your life."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p102">"Was I then so eager, was I?" Ivan snarled again.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p103">"To be sure you were, and by your consent you silently
						
						sanctioned my doing it." Smerdyakov looked resolutely at Ivan. He
						
						was very weak and spoke slowly and wearily, but some hidden inner
						
						force urged him on. He evidently had some design. Ivan felt that.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p104">"Go on," he said. "Tell me what happened that night."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p105">"What more is there to tell! I lay there and I thought I heard the
						
						master shout. And before that Grigory Vassilyevitch had suddenly got
						
						up and came out, and he suddenly gave a scream, and then all was
						
						silence and darkness. I lay there waiting, my heart beating; I
						
						couldn't bear it. I got up at last, went out. I saw the window open on
						
						the left into the garden, and I stepped to the left to listen
						
						whether he was sitting there alive, and I heard the master moving
						
						about, sighing, so I knew he was alive. 'Ech!' I thought. I went to
						
						the window and shouted to the master, 'It's I.' And he shouted to
						
						me, 'He's been, he's been; he's run away.' He meant Dmitri
						
						Fyodorovitch had been. 'He's killed Grigory! "Where?' I whispered.
						
						'There, in the corner,' he pointed. He was whispering, too. 'Wait a
						
						bit," I said. I went to the corner of the garden to look, and there
						
						I came upon Grigory Vassilyevitch lying by the wall, covered with
						
						blood, senseless. So it's true that Dmitri Fyodorovitch has been here,
						
						was the thought that came into my head, and I determined on the spot
						
						to make an end of it, as Grigory Vassilyevitch, even if he were alive,
						
						would see nothing of it, as he lay there senseless. The only risk
						
						was that Marfa Ignatyevna might wake up. I felt that at the moment,
						
						but the longing to get it done came over me, till I could scarcely
						
						breathe. I went back to the window to the master and said, 'She's
						
						here, she's come; Agrafena Alexandrovna has come, wants to be let in.'
						
						And he started like a baby. 'Where is she?' he fairly gasped, but
						
						couldn't believe it. 'She's standing there,' said I. 'Open.' He looked
						
						out of the window at me, half believing and half distrustful, but
						
						afraid to open. 'Why, he is afraid of me now,' I thought. And it was
						
						funny. I bethought me to knock on the window-frame those taps we'd
						
						agreed upon as a signal that Grushenka had come, in his presence,
						
						before his eyes. He didn't seem to believe my word, but as soon as
						
						he heard the taps, he ran at once to open the door. He opened it. I
						
						would have gone in, but he stood in the way to prevent me passing.
						
						'Where is she? Where is she?' He looked at me, all of a tremble.
						
						'Well,' thought I, 'if he's so frightened of me as all that, it's a
						
						bad lookout!' And my legs went weak with fright that he wouldn't let
						
						me in or would call out, or Marfa Ignatyevna would run up, or
						
						something else might happen. I don't remember now, but I must have
						
						stood pale, facing him. I whispered to him, 'Why, she's there,
						
						there, under the window; how is it you don't see her?' I said.
						
						'Bring her then, bring her.' 'She's afraid,' said I; 'she was
						
						frightened at the noise, she's hidden in the bushes; go and call to
						
						her yourself from the study.' He ran to the window, put the candle
						
						in the window. 'Grushenka,' he cried, 'Grushenka, are you here?'
						
						Though he cried that, he didn't want to lean out of the window, he
						
						didn't want to move away from me, for he was panic-stricken; he was so
						
						frightened he didn't dare to turn his back on me. 'Why, here she
						
						is,' said I. I went up to the window and leaned right out of it. 'Here
						
						she is; she's in the bush, laughing at you, don't you see her?' He
						
						suddenly believed it; he was all of a shake- he was awfully crazy
						
						about her- and he leaned right out of the window. I snatched up that
						
						iron paper-weight from his table; do you remember, weighing about
						
						three pounds? I swung it and hit him on the top of the skull with
						
						the corner of it. He didn't even cry out. He only sank down
						
						suddenly, and I hit him again and a third time. And the third time I
						
						knew I'd broken his skull. He suddenly rolled on his back, face
						
						upwards, covered with blood. I looked round. There was no blood on me,
						
						not a spot. I wiped the paper-weight, put it back, went up to the
						
						ikons, took the money out of the envelope, and flung the envelope on
						
						the floor and the pink ribbon beside it. I went out into the garden
						
						all of a tremble, straight to the apple-tree with a hollow in it-
						
						you know that hollow. I'd marked it long before and put a rag and a
						
						piece of paper ready in it. I wrapped all the notes in the rag and
						
						stuffed it deep down in the hole. And there it stayed for over a
						
						fortnight. I took it out later, when I came out of the hospital. I
						
						went back to my bed, lay down and thought, 'If Grigory Vassilyevitch
						
						has been killed outright it may be a bad job for me, but if he is
						
						not killed and recovers, it will be first-rate, for then he'll bear
						
						witness that Dmitri Fyodorovitch has been here, and so he must have
						
						killed him and taken the money.' Then I began groaning with suspense
						
						and impatience, so as to wake Marfa Ignatyevna as soon as possible. At
						
						last she got up and she rushed to me, but when she saw Grigory
						
						Vassilyevitch was not there, she ran out, and I heard her scream in
						
						the garden. And that set it all going and set my mind at rest."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p106">He stopped. Ivan had listened all the time in dead silence without
						
						stirring or taking his eyes off him. As he told his story Smerdyakov
						
						glanced at him from time to time, but for the most part kept his
						
						eyes averted. When he had finished he was evidently agitated and was
						
						breathing hard. The perspiration stood out on his face. But it was
						
						impossible to tell whether it was remorse he was feeling, or what.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p107">"Stay," cried Ivan pondering. "What about the door? If he only
						
						opened the door to you, how could Grigory have seen it open before?
						
						For Grigory saw it before you went."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p108">It was remarkable that Ivan spoke quite amicably, in a different
						
						tone, not angry as before, so if anyone had opened the door at that
						
						moment and peeped in at them, he would certainly have concluded that
						
						they were talking peaceably about some ordinary, though interesting,
						
						subject.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p109">"As for that door and having seen it open, that's only his fancy,"
						
						said Smerdyakov, with a wry smile. "He is not a man, I assure you, but
						
						an obstinate mule. He didn't see it, but fancied he had seen it, and
						
						there's no shaking him. It's just our luck he took that notion into
						
						his head, for they can't fail to convict Dmitri Fyodorovitch after
						
						that."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p110">"Listen... " said Ivan, beginning to seem bewildered again and
						
						making an effort to grasp something. "Listen. There are a lot of
						
						questions I want to ask you, but I forget them... I keep forgetting
						
						and getting mixed up. Yes. Tell me this at least, why did you open the
						
						envelope and leave it there on the floor? Why didn't you simply
						
						carry off the envelope?... When you were telling me, I thought you
						
						spoke about it as though it were the right thing to do... but why, I
						
						can't understand..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p111">"I did that for a good reason. For if a man had known all about
						
						it, as I did for instance, if he'd seen those notes before, and
						
						perhaps had put them in that envelope himself, and had seen the
						
						envelope sealed up and addressed, with his own eyes, if such a man had
						
						done the murder, what should have made him tear open the envelope
						
						afterwards, especially in such desperate haste, since he'd know for
						
						certain the notes must be in the envelope? No, if the robber had
						
						been someone like me, he'd simply have put the envelope straight in
						
						his pocket and got away with it as fast as he could. But it'd be quite
						
						different with Dmitri Fyodorovitch. He only knew about the envelope by
						
						hearsay; he had never seen it, and if he'd found it, for instance,
						
						under the mattress, he'd have torn it open as quickly as possible to
						
						make sure the notes were in it. And he'd have thrown the envelope
						
						down, without having time to think that it would be evidence against
						
						him. Because he was not an habitual thief and had never directly
						
						stolen anything before, for he is a gentleman born, and if he did
						
						bring himself to steal, it would not be regular stealing, but simply
						
						taking what was his own, for he'd told the whole town he meant to
						
						before, and had even bragged aloud before everyone that he'd go and
						
						take his property from Fyodor Pavlovitch. I didn't say that openly
						
						to the prosecutor when I was being examined, but quite the contrary, I
						
						brought him to it by a hint, as though I didn't see it myself, and
						
						as though he'd thought of it himself and I hadn't prompted him; so
						
						that Mr. Prosecutor's mouth positively watered at my suggestion."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p112">"But can you possibly have thought of all that on the spot?" cried
						
						Ivan, overcome with astonishment. He looked at Smerdyakov again with
						
						alarm.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p113">"Mercy on us! Could anyone think of it all in such a desperate
						
						hurry? It was all thought out beforehand."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p114">"Well... well, it was the devil helped you!" Ivan cried again.
						
						"No, you are not a fool, you are far cleverer than I thought..."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p115">He got up, obviously intending to walk across the room. He was
						
						in terrible distress. But as the table blocked his way, and there
						
						was hardly room to pass between the table and the wall, he only turned
						
						round where he stood and sat down again. Perhaps the impossibility
						
						of moving irritated him, as he suddenly cried out almost as
						
						furiously as before.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p116">"Listen, you miserable, contemptible creature! Don't you
						
						understand that if I haven't killed you, it's simply because I am
						
						keeping you to answer to-morrow at the trial. God sees," Ivan raised
						
						his hand, "perhaps I, too, was guilty; perhaps I really had a secret
						
						desire for my father's... death, but I swear I was not as guilty as
						
						you think, and perhaps I didn't urge you on at all. No, no, I didn't
						
						urge you on! But no matter, I will give evidence against myself
						
						to-morrow at the trial. I'm determined to! I shall tell everything,
						
						everything. But we'll make our appearance together. And whatever you
						
						may say against me at the trial, whatever evidence you give, I'll face
						
						it; I am not afraid of you. I'll confirm it all myself! But you must
						
						confess, too! You must, you must; we'll go together. That's how it
						
						shall be!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p117">Ivan said this solemnly and resolutely and from his flashing
						
						eyes alone it could be seen that it would be so.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p118">"You are ill, I see; you are quite ill. Your eyes are yellow,"
						
						Smerdyakov commented, without the least irony, with apparent
						
						sympathy in fact.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p119">"We'll go together," Ivan repeated. "And if you won't go, no
						
						matter, I'll go alone."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p120">Smerdyakov paused as though pondering.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p121">"There'll be nothing of the sort, and you won't go," he
						
						concluded at last positively.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p122">"You don't understand me," Ivan exclaimed reproachfully.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p123">"You'll be too much ashamed, if you confess it all. And, what's
						
						more, it will be no use at all, for I shall say straight out that I
						
						never said anything of the sort to you, and that you are either ill
						
						(and it looks like it, too), or that you're so sorry for your
						
						brother that you are sacrificing yourself to save him and have
						
						invented it all against me, for you've always thought no more of me
						
						than if I'd been a fly. And who will believe you, and what single
						
						proof have you got?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p124">"Listen, you showed me those notes just now to convince me."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p125">Smerdyakov lifted the book off the notes and laid it on one side.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p126">"Take that money away with you," Smerdyakov sighed.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p127">"Of course, I shall take it. But why do you give it to me, if
						
						you committed the murder for the sake of it?" Ivan looked at him
						
						with great surprise.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p128">"I don't want it," Smerdyakov articulated in a shaking voice, with
						
						a gesture of refusal. "I did have an idea of beginning a new life with
						
						that money in Moscow or, better still, abroad. I did dream of it,
						
						chiefly because 'all things are lawful.' That was quite right what you
						
						taught me, for you talked a lot to me about that. For if there's no
						
						everlasting God, there's no such thing as virtue, and there's no
						
						need of it. You were right there. So that's how I looked at it."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p129">"Did you come to that of yourself?" asked Ivan, with a wry smile.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p130">"With your guidance."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p131">"And now, I suppose, you believe in God, since you are giving back
						
						the money?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p132">"No, I don't believe," whispered Smerdyakov.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p133">"Then why are you giving it back?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p134">"Leave off... that's enough!" Smerdyakov waved his hand again.
						
						"You used to say yourself that everything was lawful, so now why are
						
						you so upset, too? You even want to go and give evidence against
						
						yourself.... Only there'll be nothing of the sort! You won't go to
						
						give evidence," Smerdyakov decided with conviction.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p135">"You'll see," said Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p136">"It isn't possible. You are very clever. You are fond of money,
						
						I know that. You like to be respected, too, for you're very proud; you
						
						are far too fond of female charms, too, and you mind most of all about
						
						living in undisturbed comfort, without having to depend on anyone-
						
						that's what you care most about. You won't want to spoil your life for
						
						ever by taking such a disgrace on yourself. You are like Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, you are more like him than any of his children; you've the
						
						same soul as he had."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p137">"You are not a fool," said Ivan, seeming struck. The blood
						
						rushed to his face. "You are serious now!" he observed, looking
						
						suddenly at Smerdyakov with a different expression.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p138">"It was your pride made you think I was a fool. Take the money."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p139">Ivan took the three rolls of notes and put them in his pocket
						
						without wrapping them in anything.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p140">"I shall show them at the court to-morrow," he said.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p141">"Nobody will believe you, as you've plenty of money of your own;
						
						you may simply have taken it out of your cash-box and brought it to
						
						the court."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p142">Ivan rose from his seat.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p143">"I repeat," he said, "the only reason I haven't killed you is that
						
						I need you for to-morrow, remember that, don't forget it!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p144">"Well, kill me. Kill me now," Smerdyakov said, all at once looking
						
						strangely at Ivan. "You won't dare do that even!" he added, with a
						
						bitter smile. "You won't dare to do anything, you, who used to be so
						
						bold!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p145">"Till to-morrow," cried Ivan, and moved to go out.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p146">"Stay a moment.... Show me those notes again."
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p147">Ivan took out the notes and showed them to him. Smerdyakov
						
						looked at them for ten seconds.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p148">"Well, you can go," he said, with a wave of his hand. "Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch!" he called after him again.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p149">"What do you want?" Ivan turned without stopping.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p150">"Good-bye!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p151">"Till to-morrow!" Ivan cried again, and he walked out of the
						
						cottage.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p152">The snowstorm was still raging. He walked the first few steps
						
						boldly, but suddenly began staggering. "It's something physical," he
						
						thought with a grin. Something like joy was springing up in his heart.
						
						He was conscious of unbounded resolution; he would make an end of
						
						the wavering that had so tortured him of late. His determination was
						
						taken, "and now it will not be changed," he thought with relief. At
						
						that moment he stumbled against something and almost fell down.
						
						Stopping short, he made out at his feet the peasant he had knocked
						
						down, still lying senseless and motionless. The snow had almost
						
						covered his face. Ivan seized him and lifted him in his arms. Seeing a
						
						light in the little house to the right he went up, knocked at the
						
						shutters, and asked the man to whom the house belonged to help him
						
						carry the peasant to the police station, promising him three
						
						roubles. The man got ready and came out. I won't describe in detail
						
						how Ivan succeeded in his object, bringing the peasant to the
						
						police-station and arranging for a doctor to see him at once,
						
						providing with a liberal hand for the expenses. I will only say that
						
						this business took a whole hour, but Ivan was well content with it.
						
						His mind wandered and worked incessantly.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p153">"If I had not taken my decision so firmly for to-morrow," he
						
						reflected with satisfaction, "I should not have stayed a whole hour to
						
						look after the peasant, but should have passed by, without caring
						
						about his being frozen. I am quite capable of watching myself, by
						
						the way," he thought at the same instant, with still greater
						
						satisfaction, "although they have decided that I am going out of my
						
						mind!"
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p154">Just as he reached his own house he stopped short, asking
						
						himself suddenly hadn't he better go at once to the prosecutor and
						
						tell him everything. He decided the question by turning back to the
						
						house. "Everything together to-morrow!" he whispered to himself,
						
						and, strange to say, almost all his gladness and selfsatisfaction
						
						passed in one instant.
						
							</p><p id="viii_4-p155">As he entered his own room he felt something like a touch of ice
						
						on his heart, like a recollection or, more exactly, a reminder, of
						
						something agonising and revolting that was in that room now, at that
						
						moment, and had been there before. He sank wearily on his sofa. The
						
						old woman brought him a samovar; he made tea, but did not touch it. He
						
						sat on the sofa and felt giddy. He felt that he was ill and
						
						helpless. He was beginning to drop asleep, but got up uneasily and
						
						walked across the room to shake off his drowsiness. At moments he
						
						fancied he was delirious, but it was not illness that he thought of
						
						most. Sitting down again, he began looking round, as though
						
						searching for something. This happened several times. At last his eyes
						
						were fastened intently on one point. Ivan smiled, but an angry flush
						
						suffused his face. He sat a long time in his place, his head propped
						
						on both arms, though he looked sideways at the same point, at the sofa
						
						that stood against the opposite wall. There was evidently something,
						
						some object, that irritated him there, worried him and tormented him.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 9 - The Devil. Ivan's Nightmare" prev="viii_4" next="x_1" id="ix_2">
					

							<p id="ix_2-p1">I AM NOT a doctor, but yet I feel that the moment has come when
						
						I must inevitably give the reader some account of the nature of Ivan's
						
						illness. Anticipating events I can say at least one thing: he was at
						
						that moment on the very eve of an attack of brain fever. Though his
						
						health had long been affected, it had offered a stubborn resistance to
						
						the fever which in the end gained complete mastery over it. Though I
						
						know nothing of medicine, I venture to hazard the suggestion that he
						
						really had perhaps, by a terrible effort of will, succeeded in
						
						delaying the attack for a time, hoping, of course, to check it
						
						completely. He knew that he was unwell, but he loathed the thought
						
						of being ill at that fatal time, at the approaching crisis in his
						
						life, when he needed to have all his wits about him, to say what he
						
						had to say boldly and resolutely and "to justify himself to himself."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p2">He had, however, consulted the new doctor, who had been brought
						
						from Moscow by a fantastic notion of Katerina Ivanovna's to which I
						
						have referred already. After listening to him and examining him the
						
						doctor came to the conclusion that he was actually suffering from some
						
						disorder of the brain, and was not at all surprised by an admission
						
						which Ivan had reluctantly made him. "Hallucinations are quite
						
						likely in your condition," the doctor opined, 'though it would be
						
						better to verify them... you must take steps at once, without a
						
						moment's delay, or things will go badly with you." But Ivan did not
						
						follow this judicious advice and did not take to his bed to be nursed.
						
						"I am walking about, so I am strong enough, if I drop, it'll be
						
						different then, anyone may nurse me who likes," he decided, dismissing
						
						the subject.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p3">And so he was sitting almost conscious himself of his delirium
						
						and, as I have said already, looking persistently at some object on
						
						the sofa against the opposite wall. Someone appeared to be sitting
						
						there, though goodness knows how he had come in, for he had not been
						
						in the room when Ivan came into it, on his return from Smerdyakov.
						
						This was a person or, more accurately speaking, a Russian gentleman of
						
						a particular kind, no longer young, qui faisait la cinquantaine,* as
						
						the French say, with rather long, still thick, dark hair, slightly
						
						streaked with grey and a small pointed beard. He was wearing a
						
						brownish reefer jacket, rather shabby, evidently made by a good tailor
						
						though, and of a fashion at least three years old, that had been
						
						discarded by smart and well-to-do people for the last two years. His
						
						linen and his long scarf-like neck-tie were all such as are worn by
						
						people who aim at being stylish, but on closer inspection his linen
						
						was not overclean and his wide scarf was very threadbare. The
						
						visitor's check trousers were of excellent cut, but were too light
						
						in colour and too tight for the present fashion. His soft fluffy white
						
						hat was out of keeping with the season.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p4" /><p id="ix_2-p5">* Fiftyish.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p6" /><p id="ix_2-p7">In brief there was every appearance of gentility on straitened
						
						means. It looked as though the gentleman belonged to that class of
						
						idle landowners who used to flourish in the times of serfdom. He had
						
						unmistakably been, at some time, in good and fashionable society,
						
						had once had good connections, had possibly preserved them indeed,
						
						but, after a gay youth, becoming gradually impoverished on the
						
						abolition of serfdom, he had sunk into the position of a poor relation
						
						of the best class, wandering from one good old friend to another and
						
						received by them for his companionable and accommodating disposition
						
						and as being, after all, a gentleman who could be asked to sit down
						
						with anyone, though, of course, not in a place of honour. Such
						
						gentlemen of accommodating temper and dependent position, who can tell
						
						a story, take a hand at cards, and who have a distinct aversion for
						
						any duties that may be forced upon them, are usually solitary
						
						creatures, either bachelors or widowers. Sometimes they have children,
						
						but if so, the children are always being brought up at a distance,
						
						at some aunt's, to whom these gentlemen never allude in good
						
						society, seeming ashamed of the relationship. They gradually lose
						
						sight of their children altogether, though at intervals they receive a
						
						birthday or Christmas letter from them and sometimes even answer it.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p8">The countenance of the unexpected visitor was not so much
						
						good-natured, as accommodating and ready to assume any amiable
						
						expression as occasion might arise. He had no watch, but he had a
						
						tortoise-shell lorgnette on a black ribbon. On the middle finger of
						
						his right hand was a massive gold ring with a cheap opal stone in it.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p9">Ivan was angrily silent and would not begin the conversation.
						
						The visitor waited and sat exactly like a poor relation who had come
						
						down from his room to keep his host company at tea, and was discreetly
						
						silent, seeing that his host was frowning and preoccupied. But he
						
						was ready for any affable conversation as soon as his host should
						
						begin it. All at once his face expressed a sudden solicitude.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p10">"I say," he began to Ivan, "excuse me, I only mention it to remind
						
						you. You went to Smerdyakov's to find out about Katerina Ivanovna, but
						
						you came away without finding out anything about her, you probably
						
						forgot-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p11">"Ah, yes." broke from Ivan and his face grew gloomy with
						
						uneasiness. "Yes, I'd forgotten... but it doesn't matter now, never
						
						mind, till to-morrow," he muttered to himself, "and you," he added,
						
						addressing his visitor, "I should have remembered that myself in a
						
						minute, for that was just what was tormenting me! Why do you
						
						interfere, as if I should believe that you prompted me, and that I
						
						didn't remember it of myself?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p12">"Don't believe it then," said the gentleman, smiling amicably,
						
						"what's the good of believing against your will? Besides, proofs are
						
						no help to believing, especially material proofs. Thomas believed, not
						
						because he saw Christ risen, but because he wanted to believe,
						
						before he saw. Look at the spiritualists, for instance.... I am very
						
						fond of them... only fancy, they imagine that they are serving the
						
						cause of religion, because the devils show them their horns from the
						
						other world. That, they say, is a material proof, so to speak, of
						
						the existence of another world. The other world and material proofs,
						
						what next! And if you come to that, does proving there's a devil prove
						
						that there's a God? I want to join an idealist society, I'll lead
						
						the opposition in it, I'll say I am a realist, but not a
						
						materialist, he he!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p13">"Listen," Ivan suddenly got up from the table. "I seem to be
						
						delirious... I am delirious, in fact, talk any nonsense you like, I
						
						don't care! You won't drive me to fury, as you did last time. But I
						
						feel somehow ashamed... I want to walk about the room.... I
						
						sometimes don't see you and don't even hear your voice as I did last
						
						time, but I always guess what you are prating, for it's I, I myself
						
						speaking, not you. Only I don't know whether I was dreaming last
						
						time or whether I really saw you. I'll wet a towel and put it on my
						
						head and perhaps you'll vanish into air."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p14">Ivan went into the corner, took a towel, and did as he said, and
						
						with a wet towel on his head began walking up and down the room.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p15">"I am so glad you treat me so familiarly," the visitor began.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p16">"Fool," laughed Ivan, "do you suppose I should stand on ceremony
						
						with you? I am in good spirits now, though I've a pain in my
						
						forehead... and in the top of my head... only please don't talk
						
						philosophy, as you did last time. If you can't take yourself off, talk
						
						of something amusing. Talk gossip, you are a poor relation, you
						
						ought to talk gossip. What a nightmare to have! But I am not afraid of
						
						you. I'll get the better of you. I won't be taken to a mad-house!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p17">"C'est charmant, poor relation. Yes, I am in my natural shape. For
						
						what am I on earth but a poor relation? By the way, I am listening
						
						to you and am rather surprised to find you are actually beginning to
						
						take me for something real, not simply your fancy, as you persisted in
						
						declaring last time-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p18">"Never for one minute have I taken you for reality," Ivan cried
						
						with a sort of fury. "You are a lie, you are my illness, you are a
						
						phantom. It's only that I don't know how to destroy you and I see I
						
						must suffer for a time. You are my hallucination. You are the
						
						incarnation of myself, but only of one side of me... of my thoughts
						
						and feelings, but only the nastiest and stupidest of them. From that
						
						point of view you might be of interest to me, if only I had time to
						
						waste on you-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p19">"Excuse me, excuse me, I'll catch you. When you flew out at
						
						Alyosha under the lamp-post this evening and shouted to him, 'You
						
						learnt it from him! How do you know that he visits me?' You were
						
						thinking of me then. So for one brief moment you did believe that I
						
						really exist," the gentleman laughed blandly.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p20">"Yes, that was a moment of weakness... but I couldn't believe in
						
						you. I don't know whether I was asleep or awake last time. Perhaps I
						
						was only dreaming then and didn't see you really at all-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p21">"And why were you so surly with Alyosha just now? He is a dear;
						
						I've treated him badly over Father Zossima."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p22">"Don't talk of Alyosha! How dare you, you flunkey!" Ivan laughed
						
						again.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p23">"You scold me, but you laugh- that's a good sign. But you are ever
						
						so much more polite than you were last time and I know why: that great
						
						resolution of yours-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p24">"Don't speak of my resolution," cried Ivan, savagely.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p25">"I understand, I understand, c'est noble, c'est charmant, you
						
						are going to defend your brother and to sacrifice yourself... C'est
						
						chevaleresque."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p26">"Hold your tongue, I'll kick you!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p27">"I shan't be altogether sorry, for then my object will be
						
						attained. If you kick me, you must believe in my reality, for people
						
						don't kick ghosts. Joking apart, it doesn't matter to me, scold if you
						
						like, though it's better to be a trifle more polite even to me. 'Fool,
						
						flunkey!' what words!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p28">"Scolding you, I scold myself," Ivan laughed again, "you are
						
						myself, myself, only with a different face. You just say what I am
						
						thinking... and are incapable of saying anything new!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p29">"If I am like you in my way of thinking, it's all to my credit,"
						
						the gentleman declared, with delicacy and dignity.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p30">"You choose out only my worst thoughts, and what's more, the
						
						stupid ones. You are stupid and vulgar. You are awfully stupid. No,
						
						I can't put up with you! What am I to do, what am I to do?" Ivan
						
						said through his clenched teeth.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p31">"My dear friend, above all things I want to behave like a
						
						gentleman and to be recognised as such," the visitor began in an
						
						access of deprecating and simple-hearted pride, typical of a poor
						
						relation. "I am poor, but... I won't say very honest, but... it's an
						
						axiom generally accepted in society that I am a fallen angel. I
						
						certainly can't conceive how I can ever have been an angel. If I
						
						ever was, it must have been so long ago that there's no harm in
						
						forgetting it. Now I only prize the reputation of being a
						
						gentlemanly person and live as I can, trying to make myself agreeable.
						
						I love men genuinely, I've been greatly calumniated! Here when I
						
						stay with you from time to time, my life gains a kind of reality and
						
						that's what I like most of all. You see, like you, I suffer from the
						
						fantastic and so I love the realism of earth. Here, with you,
						
						everything is circumscribed, here all is formulated and geometrical,
						
						while we have nothing but indeterminate equations! I wander about here
						
						dreaming. I like dreaming. Besides, on earth I become superstitious.
						
						Please don't laugh, that's just what I like, to become
						
						superstitious. I adopt all your habits here: I've grown fond of
						
						going to the public baths, would you believe it? and I go and steam
						
						myself with merchants and priests. What I dream of is becoming
						
						incarnate once for all and irrevocably in the form of some
						
						merchant's wife weighing eighteen stone, and of believing all she
						
						believes. My ideal is to go to church and offer a candle in
						
						simple-hearted faith, upon my word it is. Then there would be an end
						
						to my sufferings. I like being doctored too; in the spring there was
						
						an outbreak of smallpox and I went and was vaccinated in a foundling
						
						hospital- if only you knew how I enjoyed myself that day. I subscribed
						
						ten roubles in the cause of the Slavs!... But you are not listening.
						
						Do you know, you are not at all well this evening? I know you went
						
						yesterday to that doctor... well, what about your health? What did the
						
						doctor say?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p32">"Fool!" Ivan snapped out.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p33">"But you are clever, anyway. You are scolding again? I didn't
						
						ask out of sympathy. You needn't answer. Now rheumatism has come in
						
						again-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p34">"Fool!" repeated Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p35">"You keep saying the same thing; but I had such an attack of
						
						rheumatism last year that I remember it to this day."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p36">"The devil have rheumatism!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p37">"Why not, if I sometimes put on fleshly form? I put on fleshly
						
						form and I take the consequences. Satan sum et nihil humanum a me
						
						alienum puto."*
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p38" /><p id="ix_2-p39">* I am Satan, and deem nothing human alien to me.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p40" /><p id="ix_2-p41">"What, what, Satan sum et nihil humanum... that's not bad for
						
						the devil!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p42">"I am glad I've pleased you at last."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p43">"But you didn't get that from me." Ivan stopped suddenly,
						
						seeming struck. "That never entered my head, that's strange."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p44">"C'est du nouveau, n'est-ce pas?"* This time I'll act honestly and
						
						explain to you. Listen, in dreams and especially in nightmares, from
						
						indigestion or anything, a man sees sometimes such artistic visions,
						
						such complex and real actuality, such events, even a whole world of
						
						events, woven into such a plot, with such unexpected details from
						
						the most exalted matters to the last button on a cuff, as I swear
						
						Leo Tolstoy has never invented. Yet such dreams are sometimes seen not
						
						by writers, but by the most ordinary people, officials, journalists,
						
						priests.... The subject is a complete enigma. A statesman confessed to
						
						me, indeed, that all his best ideas came to him when he was asleep.
						
						Well, that's how it is now, though I am your hallucination, yet just
						
						as in a nightmare, I say original things which had not entered your
						
						head before. So I don't repeat your ideas, yet I am only your
						
						nightmare, nothing more."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p45" /><p id="ix_2-p46">* It's new, isn't it?
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p47">"You are lying, your aim is to convince me you exist apart and are
						
						not my nightmare, and now you are asserting you are a dream."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p48">"My dear fellow, I've adopted a special method to-day, I'll
						
						explain it to you afterwards. Stay, where did I break off? Oh, yes!
						
						I caught cold then, only not here but yonder."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p49">"Where is yonder? Tell me, will you be here long. Can't you go
						
						away?" Ivan exclaimed almost in despair. He ceased walking to and fro,
						
						sat down on the sofa, leaned his elbows on the table again and held
						
						his head tight in both hands. He pulled the wet towel off and flung it
						
						away in vexation. It was evidently of no use.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p50">"Your nerves are out of order," observed the gentleman, with a
						
						carelessly easy, though perfectly polite, air. "You are angry with
						
						me even for being able to catch cold, though it happened in a most
						
						natural way. I was hurrying then to a diplomatic soiree at the house
						
						of a lady of high rank in Petersburg, who was aiming at influence in
						
						the Ministry. Well, an evening suit, white tie, gloves, though I was
						
						God knows where and had to fly through space to reach your earth....
						
						Of course, it took only an instant, but you know a ray of light from
						
						the sun takes full eight minutes, and fancy in an evening suit and
						
						open waistcoat. Spirits don't freeze, but when one's in fleshly
						
						form, well... in brief, I didn't think, and set off, and you know in
						
						those ethereal spaces, in the water that is above the firmament,
						
						there's such a frost... at least one can't call it frost, you fancy,
						
						150 degrees below zero! You know the game the village girls play- they
						
						invite the unwary to lick an axe in thirty degrees of frost, the
						
						tongue instantly freezes to it and the dupe tears the skin off, so
						
						it bleeds. But that's only in 30 degrees, in 150 degrees I imagine
						
						it would be enough to put your finger on the axe and it would be the
						
						end of it... if only there could be an axe there."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p51">"And can there be an axe there?" Ivan interrupted, carelessly
						
						and disdainfully. He was exerting himself to the utmost not to believe
						
						in the delusion and not to sink into complete insanity
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p52">"An axe?" the guest interrupted in surprise.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p53">"Yes, what would become of an axe there?" Ivan cried suddenly,
						
						with a sort of savage and insistent obstinacy.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p54">"What would become of an axe in space? Quelle idee! If it were
						
						to fall to any distance, it would begin, I think, flying round the
						
						earth without knowing why, like a satellite. The astronomers would
						
						calculate the rising and the setting of the axe; Gatzuk would put it
						
						in his calendar, that's all."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p55">"You are stupid, awfully stupid," said Ivan peevishly. "Fib more
						
						cleverly or I won't listen. You want to get the better of me by
						
						realism, to convince me that you exist, but I don't want to believe
						
						you exist! I won't believe it!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p56">"But I am not fibbing, it's all the truth; the truth is
						
						unhappily hardly ever amusing. I see you persist in expecting
						
						something big of me, and perhaps something fine. That's a great
						
						pity, for I only give what I can-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p57">"Don't talk philosophy, you ass!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p58">"Philosophy, indeed, when all my right side is numb and I am
						
						moaning and groaning. I've tried all the medical faculty: they can
						
						diagnose beautifully, they have the whole of your disease at their
						
						finger-tips, but they've no idea how to cure you. There was an
						
						enthusiastic little student here, 'You may die,' said he, 'but
						
						you'll know perfectly what disease you are dying of!' And then what
						
						a way they have of sending people to specialists! 'We only
						
						diagnose,' they say, 'but go to such-and-such a specialist, he'll cure
						
						you.' The old doctor who used to cure all sorts of disease has
						
						completely disappeared, I assure you, now there are only specialists
						
						and they all advertise in the newspapers. If anything is wrong with
						
						your nose, they send you to Paris: there, they say, is a European
						
						specialist who cures noses. If you go to Paris, he'll look at your
						
						nose; I can only cure your right nostril, he'll tell you, for I
						
						don't cure the left nostril, that's not my speciality, but go to
						
						Vienna, there there's a specialist who will cure your left nostril.
						
						What are you to do? I fell back on popular remedies, a German doctor
						
						advised me to rub myself with honey and salt in the bath-house. Solely
						
						to get an extra bath I went, smeared myself all over and it did me
						
						no good at all. In despair I wrote to Count Mattei in Milan. He sent
						
						me a book and some drops, bless him, and, only fancy, Hoff's malt
						
						extract cured me! I bought it by accident, drank a bottle and a half
						
						of it, and I was ready to dance, it took it away completely. I made up
						
						my mind to write to the papers to thank him, I was prompted by a
						
						feeling of gratitude, and only fancy, it led to no end of a bother:
						
						not a single paper would take my letter. 'It would be very
						
						reactionary,' they said, 'none will believe it. Le diable n'existe
						
						point.* You'd better remain anonymous,' they advised me. What use is a
						
						letter of thanks if it's anonymous? I laughed with the men at the
						
						newspaper office; 'It's reactionary to believe in God in our days,'
						
						I said, 'but I am the devil, so I may be believed in.' 'We quite
						
						understand that,' they said. 'Who doesn't believe in the devil? Yet it
						
						won't do, it might injure our reputation. As a joke, if you like.' But
						
						I thought as a joke it wouldn't be very witty. So it wasn't printed.
						
						And do you know, I have felt sore about it to this day. My best
						
						feelings, gratitude, for instance, are literally denied me simply from
						
						my social position."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p59" /><p id="ix_2-p60">* The devil does not exist.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p61" /><p id="ix_2-p62">"Philosophical reflections again?" Ivan snarled malignantly.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p63">"God preserve me from it, but one can't help complaining
						
						sometimes. I am a slandered man. You upbraid me every moment with
						
						being stupid. One can see you are young. My dear fellow,
						
						intelligence isn't the only thing! I have naturally a kind and merry
						
						heart. 'I also write vaudevilles of all sorts.' You seem to take me
						
						for Hlestakov grown old, but my fate is a far more serious one. Before
						
						time was, by some decree which I could never make out, I was
						
						predestined 'to deny' and yet I am genuinely good-hearted and not at
						
						all inclined to negation. 'No, you must go and deny, without denial
						
						there's no criticism and what would a journal be without a column of
						
						criticism?' Without criticism it would be nothing but one
						
						'hosannah.' But nothing but hosannah is not enough for life, the
						
						hosannah must be tried in the crucible of doubt and so on, in the same
						
						style. But I don't meddle in that, I didn't create it, I am not
						
						answerable for it. Well, they've chosen their scapegoat, they've
						
						made me write the column of criticism and so life was made possible.
						
						We understand that comedy; I, for instance, simply ask for
						
						annihilation. No, live, I am told, for there'd be nothing without you.
						
						If everything in the universe were sensible, nothing would happen.
						
						There would be no events without you, and there must be events. So
						
						against the grain I serve to produce events and do what's irrational
						
						because I am commanded to. For all their indisputable intelligence,
						
						men take this farce as something serious, and that is their tragedy.
						
						They suffer, of course... but then they live, they live a real life,
						
						not a fantastic one, for suffering is life. Without suffering what
						
						would be the pleasure of it? It would be transformed into an endless
						
						church service; it would be holy, but tedious. But what about me? I
						
						suffer, but still, I don't live. I am x in an indeterminate
						
						equation. I am a sort of phantom in life who has lost all beginning
						
						and end, and who has even forgotten his own name. You are laughing-
						
						no, you are not laughing, you are angry again. You are for ever angry,
						
						all you care about is intelligence, but I repeat again that I would
						
						give away all this superstellar life, all the ranks and honours,
						
						simply to be transformed into the soul of a merchant's wife weighing
						
						eighteen stone and set candles at God's shrine."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p64">"Then even you don't believe in God?" said Ivan, with a smile of
						
						hatred.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p65">"What can I say?- that is, if you are in earnest-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p66">"Is there a God or not?" Ivan cried with the same savage
						
						intensity.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p67">"Ah, then you are in earnest! My dear fellow, upon my word I don't
						
						know. There! I've said it now!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p68">"You don't know, but you see God? No, you are not someone apart,
						
						you are myself, you are I and nothing more! You are rubbish, you are
						
						my fancy!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p69">"Well, if you like, I have the same philosophy as you, that
						
						would be true. Je pense, donc je suis,* I know that for a fact; all
						
						the rest, all these worlds, God and even Satan- all that is not
						
						proved, to my mind. Does all that exist of itself, or is it only an
						
						emanation of myself, a logical development of my ego which alone has
						
						existed for ever: but I make haste to stop, for I believe you will
						
						be jumping up to beat me directly."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p70" /><p id="ix_2-p71">* I think, therefore I am.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p72" /><p id="ix_2-p73">"You'd better tell me some anecdote!" said Ivan miserably.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p74">"There is an anecdote precisely on our subject, or rather a
						
						legend, not an anecdote. You reproach me with unbelief; you see, you
						
						say, yet you don't believe. But, my dear fellow, I am not the only one
						
						like that. We are all in a muddle over there now and all through
						
						your science. Once there used to be atoms, five senses, four elements,
						
						and then everything hung together somehow. There were atoms in the
						
						ancient world even, but since we've learned that you've discovered the
						
						chemical molecule and protoplasm and the devil knows what, we had to
						
						lower our crest. There's a regular muddle, and, above all,
						
						superstition, scandal; there's as much scandal among us as among
						
						you, you know; a little more in fact, and spying, indeed, for we
						
						have our secret police department where private information is
						
						received. Well, this wild legend belongs to our middle ages- not
						
						yours, but ours- and no one believes it even among us, except the
						
						old ladies of eighteen stone, not your old ladies I mean, but ours.
						
						We've everything you have, I am revealing one of our secrets out of
						
						friendship for you; though it's forbidden. This legend is about
						
						Paradise. There was, they say, here on earth a thinker and
						
						philosopher. He rejected everything, 'laws, conscience, faith,' and,
						
						above all, the future life. He died; he expected to go straight to
						
						darkness and death and he found a future life before him. He was
						
						astounded and indignant. 'This is against my principles!' he said. And
						
						he was punished for that... that is, you must excuse me, I am just
						
						repeating what I heard myself, it's only a legend... he was
						
						sentenced to walk a quadrillion kilometres in the dark (we've
						
						adopted the metric system, you know): and when he has finished that
						
						quadrillion, the gates of heaven would be opened to him and he'll be
						
						forgiven-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p75">"And what tortures have you in the other world besides the
						
						quadrillion kilometres?" asked Ivan, with a strange eagerness.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p76">"What tortures? Ah, don't ask. In old days we had all sorts, but
						
						now they have taken chiefly to moral punishments- 'the stings of
						
						conscience' and all that nonsense. We got that, too, from you, from
						
						the softening of your manners. And who's the better for it? Only those
						
						who have got no conscience, for how can they be tortured by conscience
						
						when they have none? But decent people who have conscience and a sense
						
						of honour suffer for it. Reforms, when the ground has not been
						
						prepared for them, especially if they are institutions copied from
						
						abroad, do nothing but mischief! The ancient fire was better. Well,
						
						this man, who was condemned to the quadrillion kilometres, stood
						
						still, looked round and lay down across the road. 'I won't go, I
						
						refuse on principle!' Take the soul of an enlightened Russian
						
						atheist and mix it with the soul of the prophet Jonah, who sulked
						
						for three days and nights in the belly of the whale, and you get the
						
						character of that thinker who lay across the road."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p77">"What did he lie on there?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p78">"Well, I suppose there was something to lie on. You are not
						
						laughing?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p79">"Bravo!" cried Ivan, still with the same strange eagerness. Now he
						
						was listening with an unexpected curiosity. "Well, is he lying there
						
						now?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p80">"That's the point, that he isn't. He lay there almost a thousand
						
						years and then he got up and went on."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p81">"What an ass!" cried Ivan, laughing nervously and still seeming to
						
						be pondering something intently. "Does it make any difference
						
						whether he lies there for ever or walks the quadrillion kilometres? It
						
						would take a billion years to walk it?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p82">"Much more than that. I haven't got a pencil and paper or I
						
						could work it out. But he got there long ago, and that's where the
						
						story begins."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p83">"What, he got there? But how did he get the billion years to do
						
						it?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p84">"Why, you keep thinking of our present earth! But our present
						
						earth may have been repeated a billion times. Why, it's become
						
						extinct, been frozen; cracked, broken to bits, disintegrated into
						
						its elements, again 'the water above the firmament,' then again a
						
						comet, again a sun, again from the sun it becomes earth- and the
						
						same sequence may have been repeated endlessly and exactly the same to
						
						every detail, most unseemly and insufferably tedious-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p85">"Well, well, what happened when he arrived?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p86">"Why, the moment the gates of Paradise were open and he walked in;
						
						before he had been there two seconds, by his watch (though to my
						
						thinking his watch must have long dissolved into its elements on the
						
						way), he cried out that those two seconds were worth walking not a
						
						quadrillion kilometres but a quadrillion of quadrillions, raised to
						
						the quadrillionth power! In fact, he sang 'hosannah' and overdid it
						
						so, that some persons there of lofty ideas wouldn't shake hands with
						
						him at first- he'd become too rapidly reactionary, they said. The
						
						Russian temperament. I repeat, it's a legend. I give it for what
						
						it's worth, so that's the sort of ideas we have on such subjects
						
						even now."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p87">"I've caught you!" Ivan cried, with an almost childish delight, as
						
						though he had succeeded in remembering something at last. "That
						
						anecdote about the quadrillion years, I made up myself! I was
						
						seventeen then, I was at the high school. I made up that anecdote
						
						and told it to a schoolfellow called Korovkin, it was at Moscow....
						
						The anecdote is so characteristic that I couldn't have taken it from
						
						anywhere. I thought I'd forgotten it... but I've unconsciously
						
						recalled it- I recalled it myself- it was not you telling it!
						
						Thousands of things are unconsciously remembered like that even when
						
						people are being taken to execution... it's come back to me in a
						
						dream. You are that dream! You are a dream, not a living creature!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p88">"From the vehemence with which you deny my existence," laughed the
						
						gentleman, "I am convinced that you believe in me."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p89">"Not in the slightest! I haven't a hundredth part of a grain of
						
						faith in you!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p90">"But you have the thousandth of a grain. Homeopathic doses perhaps
						
						are the strongest. Confess that you have faith even to the
						
						ten-thousandth of a grain."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p91">"Not for one minute," cried Ivan furiously. "But I should like
						
						to believe in you," he added strangely.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p92">"Aha! There's an admission! But I am good-natured. I'll come to
						
						your assistance again. Listen, it was I caught you, not you me. I told
						
						you your anecdote you'd forgotten, on purpose, so as to destroy your
						
						faith in me completely."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p93">"You are lying. The object of your visit is to convince me of your
						
						existence!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p94">"Just so. But hesitation, suspense, conflict between belief and
						
						disbelief- is sometimes such torture to a conscientious man, such as
						
						you are, that it's better to hang oneself at once. Knowing that you
						
						are inclined to believe in me, I administered some disbelief by
						
						telling you that anecdote. I lead you to belief and disbelief by
						
						turns, and I have my motive in it. It's the new method. As soon as you
						
						disbelieve in me completely, you'll begin assuring me to my face
						
						that I am not a dream but a reality. I know you. Then I shall have
						
						attained my object, which is an honourable one. I shall sow in you
						
						only a tiny grain of faith and it will grow into an oak-tree- and such
						
						an oak-tree that, sitting on it, you will long to enter the ranks of
						
						'the hermits in the wilderness and the saintly women,' for that is
						
						what you are secretly longing for. You'll dine on locusts, you'll
						
						wander into the wilderness to save your soul!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p95">"Then it's for the salvation of my soul you are working, is it,
						
						you scoundrel?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p96">"One must do a good work sometimes. How ill-humoured you are!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p97">"Fool! did you ever tempt those holy men who ate locusts and
						
						prayed seventeen years in the wilderness till they were overgrown with
						
						moss?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p98">"My dear fellow, I've done nothing else. One forgets the whole
						
						world and all the worlds, and sticks to one such saint, because he
						
						is a very precious diamond. One such soul, you know, is sometimes
						
						worth a whole constellation. We have our system of reckoning, you
						
						know. The conquest is priceless! And some of them, on my word, are not
						
						inferior to you in culture, though you won't believe it. They can
						
						contemplate such depths of belief and disbelief at the same moment
						
						that sometimes it really seems that they are within a hair's-breadth
						
						of being 'turned upside down,' as the actor Gorbunov says."
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p99">"Well, did you get your nose pulled?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p100">"My dear fellow," observed the visitor sententiously, "it's better
						
						to get off with your nose pulled than without a nose at all. As an
						
						afflicted marquis observed not long ago (he must have been treated
						
						by a specialist) in confession to his spiritual father- a Jesuit. I
						
						was present, it was simply charming. 'Give me back my nose!' he
						
						said, and he beat his breast. 'My son,' said the priest evasively,
						
						'all things are accomplished in accordance with the inscrutable
						
						decrees of Providence, and what seems a misfortune sometimes leads
						
						to extraordinary, though unapparent, benefits. If stern destiny has
						
						deprived you of your nose, it's to your advantage that no one can ever
						
						pull you by your nose.' 'Holy father, that's no comfort,' cried the
						
						despairing marquis. 'I'd be delighted to have my nose pulled every day
						
						of my life, if it were only in its proper place.' 'My son,' sighs
						
						the priest, 'you can't expect every blessing at once. This is
						
						murmuring against Providence, who even in this has not forgotten
						
						you, for if you repine as you repined just now, declaring you'd be
						
						glad to have your nose pulled for the rest of your life, your desire
						
						has already been fulfilled indirectly, for when you lost your nose,
						
						you were led by the nose.'
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p101">"Fool, how stupid!" cried Ivan.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p102">"My dear friend, I only wanted to amuse you. But I swear that's
						
						the genuine Jesuit casuistry and I swear that it all happened word for
						
						word as I've told you. It happened lately and gave me a great deal
						
						of trouble. The unhappy young man shot himself that very night when he
						
						got home. I was by his side till the very last moment. Those Jesuit
						
						confessionals are really my most delightful diversion at melancholy
						
						moments. Here's another incident that happened only the other day. A
						
						little blonde Norman girl of twenty- a buxom, unsophisticated beauty
						
						that would make your mouth water- comes to an old priest. She bends
						
						down and whispers her sin into the grating. 'Why, my daughter, have
						
						you fallen again already?' cries the priest: 'O Sancta Maria, what
						
						do I hear! Not the same man this time, how long is this going on?
						
						Aren't you ashamed!' 'Ah, mon pere,' answers the sinner with tears
						
						of penitence, 'Ca lui fait tant de plaisir, et a moi si peu de
						
						peine!'* Fancy, such an answer! I drew back. It was the cry of nature,
						
						better than innocence itself, if you like. I absolved her sin on the
						
						spot and was turning to go, but I was forced to turn back. I heard the
						
						priest at the grating making an appointment with her for the
						
						evening- though he was an old man hard as flint, he fell in an
						
						instant! It was nature, the truth of nature asserted its rights! What,
						
						you are turning up your nose again? Angry again? I don't know how to
						
						please you-"
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p103" /><p id="ix_2-p104">* Ah, my father, this gives him so much pleasure, and me so little
						
						pain!
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p105" /><p id="ix_2-p106">"Leave me alone, you are beating on my brain like a haunting
						
						nightmare," Ivan moaned miserably, helpless before his apparition.
						
						"I am bored with you, agonisingly and insufferably. I would give
						
						anything to be able to shake you off!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p107">"I repeat, moderate your expectations, don't demand of me
						
						'everything great and noble,' and you'll see how well we shall get
						
						on," said the gentleman impressively. "You are really angry with me
						
						for not having appeared to you in a red glow, with thunder and
						
						lightning, with scorched wings, but have shown myself in such a modest
						
						form. You are wounded, in the first place, in your asthetic
						
						feelings, and, secondly, in your pride. How could such a vulgar
						
						devil visit such a great man as you! Yes, there is that romantic
						
						strain in you, that was so derided by Byelinsky. I can't help it,
						
						young man, as I got ready to come to you I did think as a joke of
						
						appearing in the figure of a retired general who had served in the
						
						Caucasus, with a star of the Lion and the Sun on my coat. But I was
						
						positively afraid of doing it, for you'd have thrashed me for daring
						
						to pin the Lion and the Sun on my coat, instead of, at least, the
						
						Polar Star or the Sirius. And you keep on saying I am stupid, but,
						
						mercy on us! I make no claim to be equal to you in intelligence.
						
						Mephistopheles declared to Faust that he desired evil, but did only
						
						good. Well, he can say what he likes, it's quite the opposite with me.
						
						I am perhaps the one man in all creation who loves the truth and
						
						genuinely desires good. I was there when the Word, Who died on the
						
						Cross, rose up into heaven bearing on His bosom the soul of the
						
						penitent thief. I heard the glad shrieks of the cherubim singing and
						
						shouting hosannah and the thunderous rapture of the seraphim which
						
						shook heaven and all creation, and I swear to you by all that's
						
						sacred, I longed to join the choir and shout hosannah with them all.
						
						The word had almost escaped me, had almost broken from my lips...
						
						you know how susceptible and aesthetically impressionable I am. But
						
						common sense- oh, a most unhappy trait in my character- kept me in due
						
						bounds and I let the moment pass! For what would have happened, I
						
						reflected, what would have happened after my hosannah? Everything on
						
						earth would have been extinguished at once and no events could have
						
						occurred. And so, solely from a sense of duty and my social
						
						position, was forced to suppress the good moment and to stick to my
						
						nasty task. Somebody takes all the credit of what's good for
						
						Himself, and nothing but nastiness is left for me. But I don't envy
						
						the honour of a life of idle imposture, I am not ambitious. Why am
						
						I, of all creatures in the world, doomed to be cursed by all decent
						
						people and even to be kicked, for if I put on mortal form I am bound
						
						to take such consequences sometimes? I know, of course, there's a
						
						secret in it, but they won't tell me the secret for anything, for then
						
						perhaps, seeing the meaning of it, I might bawl hosannah, and the
						
						indispensable minus would disappear at once, and good sense would
						
						reign supreme throughout the whole world. And that, of course, would
						
						mean the end of everything, even of magazines and newspapers, for
						
						who would take them in? I know that at the end of all things I shall
						
						be reconciled. I, too, shall walk my quadrillion and learn the secret.
						
						But till that happens I am sulking and fulfil my destiny though it's
						
						against the grain- that is, to ruin thousands for the sake of saving
						
						one. How many souls have had to be ruined and how many honourable
						
						reputations destroyed for the sake of that one righteous man, Job,
						
						over whom they made such a fool of me in old days! Yes, till the
						
						secret is revealed, there are two sorts of truths for me- one, their
						
						truth, yonder, which I know nothing about so far, and the other my
						
						own. And there's no knowing which will turn out the better.... Are you
						
						asleep?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p108">"I might well be," Ivan groaned angrily. "All my stupid ideas-
						
						outgrown, thrashed out long ago, and flung aside like a dead carcass
						
						you present to me as something new!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p109">"There's no pleasing you! And I thought I should fascinate you
						
						by my literary style. That hosannah in the skies really wasn't bad,
						
						was it? And then that ironical tone a la Heine, eh?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p110">"No, I was never such a flunkey! How then could my soul beget a
						
						flunkey like you?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p111">"My dear fellow, I know a most charming and attractive young
						
						Russian gentleman, a young thinker and a great lover of literature and
						
						art, the author of a promising poem entitled The Grand Inquisitor. I
						
						was only thinking of him!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p112">"I forbid you to speak of The Grand Inquisitor," cried Ivan,
						
						crimson with shame.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p113">"And the Geological Cataclysm. Do you remember? That was a poem,
						
						now!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p114">"Hold your tongue, or I'll kill you!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p115">"You'll kill me? No, excuse me, I will speak. I came to treat
						
						myself to that pleasure. Oh, I love the dreams of my ardent young
						
						friends, quivering with eagerness for life! 'There are new men,' you
						
						decided last spring, when you were meaning to come here, 'they propose
						
						to destroy everything and begin with cannibalism. Stupid fellows! they
						
						didn't ask my advice! I maintain that nothing need be destroyed,
						
						that we only need to destroy the idea of God in man, that's how we
						
						have to set to work. It's that, that we must begin with. Oh, blind
						
						race of men who have no understanding! As soon as men have all of them
						
						denied God- and I believe that period, analogous with geological
						
						periods, will come to pass- the old conception of the universe will
						
						fall of itself without cannibalism, and, what's more, the old
						
						morality, and everything will begin anew. Men will unite to take
						
						from life all it can give, but only for joy and happiness in the
						
						present world. Man will be lifted up with a spirit of divine Titanic
						
						pride and the man-god will appear. From hour to hour extending his
						
						conquest of nature infinitely by his will and his science, man will
						
						feel such lofty joy from hour to hour in doing it that it will make up
						
						for all his old dreams of the joys of heaven. Everyone will know
						
						that he is mortal and will accept death proudly and serenely like a
						
						god. His pride will teach him that it's useless for him to repine at
						
						life's being a moment, and he will love his brother without need of
						
						reward. Love will be sufficient only for a moment of life, but the
						
						very consciousness of its momentariness will intensify its fire, which
						
						now is dissipated in dreams of eternal love beyond the grave'... and
						
						so on and so on in the same style. Charming!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p116">Ivan sat with his eyes on the floor, and his hands pressed to
						
						his ears, but he began trembling all over. The voice continued.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p117">"The question now is, my young thinker reflected, is it possible
						
						that such a period will ever come? If it does, everything is
						
						determined and humanity is settled for ever. But as, owing to man's
						
						inveterate stupidity, this cannot come about for at least a thousand
						
						years, everyone who recognises the truth even now may legitimately
						
						order his life as he pleases, on the new principles. In that sense,
						
						'all things are lawful' for him. What's more, even if this period
						
						never comes to pass, since there is anyway no God and no
						
						immortality, the new man may well become the man-god, even if he is
						
						the only one in the whole world, and promoted to his new position,
						
						he may lightheartedly overstep all the barriers of the old morality of
						
						the old slaveman, if necessary. There is no law for God. Where God
						
						stands, the place is holy. Where I stand will be at once the
						
						foremost place... 'all things are lawful' and that's the end of it!
						
						That's all very charming; but if you want to swindle why do you want a
						
						moral sanction for doing it? But that's our modern Russian all over.
						
						He can't bring himself to swindle without a moral sanction. He is so
						
						in love with truth-"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p118">The visitor talked, obviously carried away by his own eloquence,
						
						speaking louder and louder and looking ironically at his host. But
						
						he did not succeed in finishing; Ivan suddenly snatched a glass from
						
						the table and flung it at the orator.
						
							"Ah, mais c'est bete enfin,"* cried the latter, jumping up from
						
						the sofa and shaking the drops of tea off himself. "He remembers
						
						Luther's inkstand! He takes me for a dream and throws glasses at a
						
						dream! It's like a woman! I suspected you were only pretending to stop
						
						up your ears."
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p119" /><p id="ix_2-p120">* But after all, that's stupid.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p121" /><p id="ix_2-p122">A loud, persistent knocking was suddenly heard at the window. Ivan
						
						jumped up from the sofa.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p123">"Do you hear? You'd better open," cried the visitor; "it's your
						
						brother Alyosha with the most interesting and surprising news, I'll be
						
						bound!"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p124">"Be silent, deceiver, I knew it was Alyosha, I felt he was coming,
						
						and of course he has not come for nothing; of course he brings
						
						'news,'" Ivan exclaimed frantically.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p125">"Open, open to him. There's a snowstorm and he is your brother.
						
						Monsieur sait-il le temps qu'il fait? C'est a ne pas mettre un chien
						
						dehors."*
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p126" /><p id="ix_2-p127">* Does the gentleman know the weather he's making? It's not
						
						weather for a dog.
						
						
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p128" /><p id="ix_2-p129">The knocking continued. Ivan wanted to rush to the window, but
						
						something seemed to fetter his arms and legs. He strained every effort
						
						to break his chains, but in vain. The knocking at the window grew
						
						louder and louder. At last the chains were broken and Ivan leapt up
						
						from the sofa. He looked round him wildly. Both candles had almost
						
						burnt out, the glass he had just thrown at his visitor stood before
						
						him on the table, and there was no one on the sofa opposite. The
						
						knocking on the window frame went on persistently, but it was by no
						
						means so loud as it had seemed in his dream; on the contrary, it was
						
						quite subdued.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p130">"It was not a dream! No, I swear it was not a dream, it all
						
						happened just now!" cried Ivan. He rushed to the window and opened the
						
						movable pane.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p131">"Alyosha, I told you not to come," he cried fiercely to his
						
						brother. "In two words, what do you want? In two words, do you hear?"
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p132">"An hour ago Smerdyakov hanged himself," Alyosha answered from the
						
						yard.
						
							</p><p id="ix_2-p133">"Come round to the steps, I'll open at once," said Ivan, going
						
						to open the door to Alyosha.</p>
						
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 10 - It Was He Who Said That" prev="ix_2" next="iii_15" id="x_1">
							<p id="x_1-p1">ALYOSHA coming in told Ivan that a little over an hour ago Marya
						
						Kondratyevna had run to his rooms and informed him Smerdyakov had
						
						taken his own life. "I went in to clear away the samovar and he was
						
						hanging on a nail in the wall." On Alyosha's inquiring whether she had
						
						informed the police, she answered that she had told no one, "but I
						
						flew straight to you, I've run all the way." She seemed perfectly
						
						crazy, Alyosha reported, and was shaking like a leaf. When Alyosha ran
						
						with her to the cottage, he found Smerdyakov still hanging. On the
						
						table lay a note: "I destroy my life of my own will and desire, so
						
						as to throw no blame on anyone." Alyosha left the note on the table
						
						and went straight to the police captain and told him all about it.
						
						"And from him I've come straight to you," said Alyosha, in conclusion,
						
						looking intently into Ivan's face. He had not taken his eyes off him
						
						while he told his story, as though struck by something in his
						
						expression.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p2">"Brother," he cried suddenly, "you must be terribly ill. You
						
						look and don't seem to understand what I tell you."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p3">"It's a good thing you came," said Ivan, as though brooding, and
						
						not hearing Alyosha's exclamation. "I knew he had hanged himself."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p4">"From whom?"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p5">"I don't know. But I knew. Did I know? Yes, he told me. He told me
						
						so just now."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p6">Ivan stood in the middle of the room, and still spoke in the
						
						same brooding tone, looking at the ground.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p7">"Who is he?" asked Alyosha, involuntarily looking round.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p8">"He's slipped away."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p9">Ivan raised his head and smiled softly.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p10">"He was afraid of you, of a dove like you. You are a 'pure
						
						cherub.' Dmitri calls you a cherub. Cherub!... the thunderous
						
						rapture of the seraphim. What are seraphim? Perhaps a whole
						
						constellation. But perhaps that constellation is only a chemical
						
						molecule. There's a constellation of the Lion and the Sun. Don't you
						
						know it?"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p11">"Brother, sit down," said Alyosha in alarm. "For goodness' sake,
						
						sit down on the sofa! You are delirious; put your head on the
						
						pillow, that's right. Would you like a wet towel on your head? Perhaps
						
						it will do you good."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p12">"Give me the towel: it's here on the chair. I just threw it down
						
						there."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p13">"It's not here. Don't worry yourself. I know where it is- here,"
						
						said Alyosha, finding a clean towel, folded up and unused, by Ivan's
						
						dressing-table in the other corner of the room. Ivan looked
						
						strangely at the towel: recollection seemed to come back to him for an
						
						instant.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p14">"Stay"- he got up from the sofa- "an hour ago I took that new
						
						towel from there and wetted it. I wrapped it round my head and threw
						
						it down here... How is it it's dry? There was no other."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p15">"You put that towel on your head?" asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p16">"Yes, and walked up and down the room an hour ago... Why have
						
						the candles burnt down so? What's the time?"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p17">"Nearly twelve"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p18">"No, no, no!" Ivan cried suddenly. "It was not a dream. He was
						
						here; he was sitting here, on that sofa. When you knocked at the
						
						window, I threw a glass at him... this one. Wait a minute. I was
						
						asleep last time, but this dream was not a dream. It has happened
						
						before. I have dreams now, Alyosha... yet they are not dreams, but
						
						reality. I walk about, talk and see... though I am asleep. But he
						
						was sitting here, on that sofa there.... He is frightfully stupid,
						
						Alyosha, frightfully stupid." Ivan laughed suddenly and began pacing
						
						about the room.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p19">"Who is stupid? Of whom are you talking, brother?" Alyosha asked
						
						anxiously again.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p20">"The devil! He's taken to visiting me. He's been here twice,
						
						almost three times. He taunted me with being angry at his being a
						
						simple devil and not Satan, with scorched wings, in thunder and
						
						lightning. But he is not Satan: that's a lie. He is an impostor. He is
						
						simply a devil- a paltry, trivial devil. He goes to the baths. If
						
						you undressed him, you'd be sure to find he had a tail, long and
						
						smooth like a Danish dog's, a yard long, dun colour.... Alyosha, you
						
						are cold. You've been in the snow. Would you like some tea? What? Is
						
						it cold? Shall I tell her to bring some? C'est a ne pas mettre un
						
						chien dehors..."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p21">Alyosha ran to the washing-stand, wetted the towel, persuaded Ivan
						
						to sit down again, and put the wet towel round his head. He sat down
						
						beside him.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p22">"What were you telling me just now about Lise?" Ivan began
						
						again. (He was becoming very talkative.) "I like Lise. I said
						
						something nasty about her. It was a lie. I like her... I am afraid for
						
						Katya to-morrow. I am more afraid of her than of anything. On
						
						account of the future. She will cast me off to-morrow and trample me
						
						under foot. She thinks that I am ruining Mitya from jealousy on her
						
						account! Yes, she thinks that! But it's not so. To-morrow the cross,
						
						but not the gallows. No, I shan't hang myself. Do you know, I can
						
						never commit suicide, Alyosha. Is it because I am base? I am not a
						
						coward. Is it from love of life? How did I know that Smerdyakov had
						
						hanged himself? Yes, it was he told me so."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p23">"And you are quite convinced that there has been someone here?"
						
						asked Alyosha.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p24">"Yes, on that sofa in the corner. You would have driven him
						
						away. You did drive him away: he disappeared when you arrived. I
						
						love your face, Alyosha. Did you know that I loved your face? And he
						
						is myself, Alyosha. All that's base in me, all that's mean and
						
						contemptible. Yes, I am a romantic. He guessed it... though it's a
						
						libel. He is frightfully stupid; but it's to his advantage. He has
						
						cunning, animal cunning- he knew how to infuriate me. He kept taunting
						
						me with believing in him, and that was how he made me listen to him.
						
						He fooled me like a boy. He told me a great deal that was true about
						
						myself, though. I should never have owned it to myself. Do you know,
						
						Alyosha," Ivan added in an intensely earnest and confidential tone, "I
						
						should be awfully glad to think that it was he and not I."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p25">"He has worn you out," said Alyosha, looking compassionately at
						
						his brother.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p26">"He's been teasing me. And you know he does it so cleverly, so
						
						cleverly. 'Conscience! What is conscience? I make it up for myself.
						
						Why am I tormented by it? From habit. From the universal habit of
						
						mankind for the seven thousand years. So let us give it up, and we
						
						shall be gods.' It was he said that, it was he said that!"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p27">"And not you, not you?" Alyosha could not help crying, looking
						
						frankly at his brother. "Never mind him, anyway; have done with him
						
						and forget him. And let him take with him all that you curse now,
						
						and never come back!"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p28">"Yes, but he is spiteful. He laughed at me. He was impudent,
						
						Alyosha," Ivan said, with a shudder of offence. "But he was unfair
						
						to me, unfair to me about lots of things. He told lies about me to
						
						my face. 'Oh, you are going to perform an act of heroic virtue: to
						
						confess you murdered your father, that the valet murdered him at
						
						your instigation.'"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p29">"Brother," Alyosha interposed, "restrain yourself. It was not
						
						you murdered him. It's not true!"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p30">"That's what he says, he, and he knows it. 'You are going to
						
						perform an act of heroic virtue, and you don't believe in virtue;
						
						that's what tortures you and makes you angry, that's why you are so
						
						vindictive.' He said that to me about me and he knows what he says."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p31">"It's you say that, not he," exclaimed Alyosha mournfully, "and
						
						you say it because you are ill and delirious, tormenting yourself."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p32">"No, he knows what he says. 'You are going from pride,' he says.
						
						'You'll stand up and say it was I killed him, and why do you writhe
						
						with horror? You are lying! I despise your opinion, I despise your
						
						horror!' He said that about me. 'And do you know you are longing for
						
						their praise- "he is a criminal, a murderer, but what a generous soul;
						
						he wanted to save his brother and he confessed." That's a lie
						
						Alyosha!" Ivan cried suddenly, with flashing eyes. "I don't want the
						
						low rabble to praise me, I swear I don't! That's a lie! That's why I
						
						threw the glass at him and it broke against his ugly face."
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p33">"Brother, calm yourself, stop!" Alyosha entreated him.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p34">"Yes, he knows how to torment one. He's cruel," Ivan went on,
						
						unheeding. "I had an inkling from the first what he came for.
						
						'Granting that you go through pride, still you had a hope that
						
						Smerdyakov might be convicted and sent to Siberia, and Mitya would
						
						be acquitted, while you would only be punished, with moral
						
						condemnation' ('Do you hear?' he laughed then)- 'and some people
						
						will praise you. But now Smerdyakov's dead, he has hanged himself, and
						
						who'll believe you alone? But yet you are going, you are going, you'll
						
						go all the same, you've decided to go. What are you going for now?'
						
						That's awful, Alyosha. I can't endure such questions. Who dare ask
						
						me such questions?"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p35">"Brother," interposed Alyosha- his heart sank with terror, but
						
						he still seemed to hope to bring Ivan to reason- "how could he have
						
						told you of Smerdyakov's death before I came, when no one knew of it
						
						and there was no time for anyone to know of it?"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p36">"He told me," said Ivan firmly, refusing to admit a doubt. "It was
						
						all he did talk about, if you come to that. 'And it would be all right
						
						if you believed in virtue,' he said. 'No matter if they disbelieve
						
						you, you are going for the sake of principle. But you are a little pig
						
						like Fyodor Pavlovitch, and what do you want with virtue? Why do you
						
						want to go meddling if your sacrifice is of no use to anyone?
						
						Because you don't know yourself why you go! Oh, you'd give a great
						
						deal to know yourself why you go! And can you have made up your
						
						mind? You've not made up your mind. You'll sit all night
						
						deliberating whether to go or not. But you will go; you know you'll
						
						go. You know that whichever way you decide, the decision does not
						
						depend on you. You'll go because you won't dare not to go. Why won't
						
						you dare? You must guess that for yourself. That's a riddle for
						
						you!' He got up and went away. You came and he went. He called me a
						
						coward, Alyosha! Le mot de l'enigme is that I am a coward. 'It is
						
						not for such eagles to soar above the earth.'It was he added that- he!
						
						And Smerdyakov said the same. He must be killed! Katya despises me.
						
						I've seen that for a month past. Even Lise will begin to despise me!
						
						'You are going in order to be praised.' That's a brutal lie! And you
						
						despise me too, Alyosha. Now I am going to hate you again! And I
						
						hate the monster, too! I hate the monster! I don't want to save the
						
						monster. Let him rot in Siberia! He's begun singing a hymn! Oh,
						
						to-morrow I'll go, stand before them, and spit in their faces!"
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p37">He jumped up in a frenzy, flung off the towel, and fell to
						
						pacing up and down the room again. Alyosha recalled what he had just
						
						said. "I seem to be sleeping awake... I walk, I speak, I see, but I am
						
						asleep." It seemed to be just like that now. Alyosha did not leave
						
						him. The thought passed through his mind to run for a doctor, but he
						
						was afraid to leave his brother alone: there was no one to whom he
						
						could leave him. By degrees Ivan lost consciousness completely at
						
						last. He still went on talking, talking incessantly, but quite
						
						incoherently, and even articulated his words with difficulty. Suddenly
						
						he staggered violently; but Alyosha was in time to support him. Ivan
						
						let him lead him to his bed. Alyosha undressed him somehow and put him
						
						to bed. He sat watching over him for another two hours. The sick man
						
						slept soundly, without stirring, breathing softly and evenly.
						
						Alyosha took a pillow and lay down on the sofa, without undressing.
						
							</p><p id="x_1-p38">As he fell asleep he prayed for Mitya and Ivan. He began to
						
						understand Ivan's illness. "The anguish of a proud determination. An
						
						earnest conscience!" God, in Whom he disbelieved, and His truth were
						
						gaining mastery over his heart, which still refused to submit.
						
						"Yes," the thought floated through Alyosha's head as it lay on the
						
						pillow, "yes, if Smerdyakov is dead, no one will believe Ivan's
						
						evidence; but he will go and give it." Alyosha smiled softly. "God
						
						will conquer!" he thought. "He will either rise up in the light of
						
						truth, or... he'll perish in hate, revenging on himself and on
						
						everyone his having served the cause he does not believe in,"
						
						Alyosha added bitterly, and again he prayed for Ivan.</p>
						
					
					</div4>  			
				</div3>

<div3 title="Book XII - A Judicial Error" prev="x_1" next="i_17" id="iii_15">

<div4 title="Chapter 1 - The Fatal Day" prev="iii_15" next="ii_16" id="i_17">
					
					



							<p id="i_17-p1">AT ten o'clock in the morning of the day following the events I
						
						have described, the trial of Dmitri Karamazov began in our district
						
						court.</p><p id="i_17-p2">    I hasten to emphasise the fact that I am far from esteeming myself
						
						capable of reporting all that took place at the trial in full
						
						detail, or even in the actual order of events. I imagine that to
						
						mention everything with full explanation would fill a volume, even a
						
						very large one. And so I trust I may not be reproached, for
						
						confining myself to what struck me. I may have selected as of most
						
						interest what was of secondary importance, and may have omitted the
						
						most prominent and essential details. But I see I shall do better
						
						not to apologise. I will do my best and the reader will see for
						
						himself that I have done all I can.</p><p id="i_17-p3">    And, to begin with, before entering the court, I will mention what
						
						surprised me most on that day. Indeed, as it appeared later,
						
						everyone was surprised at it, too. We all knew that the affair had
						
						aroused great interest, that everyone was burning with impatience
						
						for the trial to begin, that it had been a subject of talk,
						
						conjecture, exclamation and surmise for the last two months in local
						
						society. Everyone knew, too, that the case had become known throughout
						
						Russia, but yet we had not imagined that it had aroused such
						
						burning, such intense, interest in everyone, not only among ourselves,
						
						but all over Russia. This became evident at the trial this day.</p><p id="i_17-p4">    Visitors had arrived not only from the chief town of our province,
						
						but from several other Russian towns, as well as from Moscow and
						
						Petersburg. Among them were lawyers, ladies, and even several
						
						distinguished personages. Every ticket of admission had been
						
						snatched up. A special place behind the table at which the three
						
						judges sat was set apart for the most distinguished and important of
						
						the men visitors; a row of arm-chairs had been placed there- something
						
						exceptional, which had never been allowed before. A large proportion
						
						not less than half of the public- were ladies. There was such a
						
						large number of lawyers from all parts that they did not know where to
						
						seat them, for every ticket had long since been eagerly sought for and
						
						distributed. I saw at the end of the room, behind the platform, a
						
						special partition hurriedly put up, behind which all these lawyers
						
						were admitted, and they thought themselves lucky to have standing room
						
						there, for all chairs had been removed for the sake of space, and
						
						the crowd behind the partition stood throughout the case closely
						
						packed, shoulder to shoulder.</p><p id="i_17-p5">    Some of the ladies, especially those who came from a distance,
						
						made their appearance in the gallery very smartly dressed, but the
						
						majority of the ladies were oblivious even of dress. Their faces
						
						betrayed hysterical, intense, almost morbid, curiosity. A peculiar
						
						fact- established afterwards by many observations- was that almost all
						
						the ladies, or, at least the vast majority of them, were on Mitya's
						
						side and in favour of his being acquitted. This was perhaps chiefly
						
						owing to his reputation as a conqueror of female hearts. It was
						
						known that two women rivals were to appear in the case. One of them-
						
						Katerina Ivanovna- was an object of general interest. All sorts of
						
						extraordinary tales were told about her, amazing anecdotes of her
						
						passion for Mitya, in spite of his crime. Her pride and
						
						"aristocratic connections" were particularly insisted upon (she had
						
						called upon scarcely anyone in the town). People said she intended
						
						to petition the Government for leave to accompany the criminal to
						
						Siberia and to be married to him somewhere in the mines. The
						
						appearance of Grushenka in court was awaited with no less
						
						impatience. The public was looking forward with anxious curiosity to
						
						the meeting of the two rivals- the proud aristocratic girl and "the
						
						hetaira." But Grushenka was a more familiar figure to the ladies of
						
						the district than Katerina Ivanovna. They had already seen "the
						
						woman who had ruined Fyodor Pavlovitch and his unhappy son," and
						
						all, almost without exception, wondered how father and son could be so
						
						in love with "such a very common, ordinary Russian girl, who was not
						
						even pretty."
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p6">In brief, there was a great deal of talk. I know for a fact that
						
						there were several serious family quarrels on Mitya's account in our
						
						town. Many ladies quarrelled violently with their husbands over
						
						differences of opinion about the dreadful case, and it was that the
						
						husbands of these ladies, far from being favourably disposed to the
						
						prisoner, should enter the court bitterly prejudiced against him. In
						
						fact, one may say pretty certainly that the masculine, as
						
						distinguished from the feminine, part of the audience was biased
						
						against the prisoner. There were numbers of severe, frowning, even
						
						vindictive faces. Mitya, indeed, had managed to offend many people
						
						during his stay in the town. Some of the visitors were, of course,
						
						in excellent spirits and quite unconcerned as to the fate of Mitya
						
						personally. But all were interested in the trial, and the majority
						
						of the men were certainly hoping for the conviction of the criminal,
						
						except perhaps the lawyers, who were more interested in the legal than
						
						in the moral aspect of the case.</p><p id="i_17-p7">    Everybody was excited at the presence of the celebrated lawyer,
						
						Fetyukovitch. His talent was well known, and this was not the first
						
						time he had defended notorious criminal cases in the provinces. And if
						
						he defended them, such cases became celebrated and long remembered all
						
						over Russia. There were stories, too, about our prosecutor and about
						
						the President of the Court. It was said that Ippolit Kirillovitch
						
						was in a tremor at meeting Fetyukovitch, and that they had been
						
						enemies from the beginning of their careers in Petersburg, that though
						
						our sensitive prosecutor, who always considered that he had been
						
						aggrieved by someone in Petersburg because his talents had not been
						
						properly appreciated, was keenly excited over the Karamazov case,
						
						and was even dreaming of rebuilding his flagging fortunes by means
						
						of it, Fetyukovitch, they said, was his one anxiety. But these rumours
						
						were not quite just. Our prosecutor was not one of those men who
						
						lose heart in face of danger. On the contrary, his self-confidence
						
						increased with the increase of danger. It must be noted that our
						
						prosecutor was in general too hasty and morbidly impressionable. He
						
						would put his whole soul into some case and work at it as though his
						
						whole fate and his whole fortune depended on its result. This was
						
						the subject of some ridicule in the legal world, for just by this
						
						characteristic our prosecutor had gained a wider notoriety than
						
						could have been expected from his modest position. People laughed
						
						particularly at his passion for psychology. In my opinion, they were
						
						wrong, and our prosecutor was, I believe, a character of greater depth
						
						than was generally supposed. But with his delicate health he had
						
						failed to make his mark at the outset of his career and had never made
						
						up for it later.</p><p id="i_17-p8">    As for the President of our Court, I can only say that he was a
						
						humane and cultured man, who had a practical knowledge of his work and
						
						progressive views. He was rather ambitious, but did not concern
						
						himself greatly about his future career. The great aim of his life was
						
						to be a man of advanced ideas. He was, too, a man of connections and
						
						property. He felt, as we learnt afterwards, rather strongly about
						
						the Karamazov case, but from a social, not from a personal standpoint.</p><p id="i_17-p9">He was interested in it as a social phenomenon, in its
						
						classification and its character as a product of our social
						
						conditions, as typical of the national character, and so on, and so
						
						on. His attitude to the personal aspect of the case, to its tragic
						
						significance and the persons involved in it, including the prisoner,
						
						was rather indifferent and abstract, as was perhaps fitting, indeed.</p><p id="i_17-p10">    The court was packed and overflowing long before the judges made
						
						their appearance. Our court is the best hall in the town- spacious,
						
						lofty, and good for sound. On the right of the judges, who were on a
						
						raised platform, a table and two rows of chairs had been put ready for
						
						the jury. On the left was the place for the prisoner and the counsel
						
						for the defence. In the middle of the court, near the judges, was a
						
						table with the "material proofs." On it lay Fyodor Pavlovitch's
						
						white silk dressing-gown, stained with blood; the fatal brass pestle
						
						with which the supposed murder had been committed; Mitya's shirt, with
						
						a blood-stained sleeve; his coat, stained with blood in patches over
						
						the pocket in which he had put his handkerchief; the handkerchief
						
						itself, stiff with blood and by now quite yellow; the pistol loaded by
						
						Mitya at Perhotin's with a view to suicide, and taken from him on
						
						the sly at Mokroe by Trifon Borrissovitch; the envelope in which the
						
						three thousand roubles had been put ready for Grushenka, the narrow
						
						pink ribbon with which it had been tied, and many other articles I
						
						don't remember. In the body of the hall, at some distance, came the
						
						seats for the public. But in front of the balustrade a few chairs
						
						had been placed for witnesses who remained in the court after giving
						
						their evidence.</p><p id="i_17-p11">    At ten o'clock the three judges arrived- the President, one
						
						honorary justice of the peace, and one other. The prosecutor, of
						
						course, entered immediately after. The President was a short, stout,
						
						thick-set man of fifty, with a dyspeptic complexion, dark hair turning
						
						grey and cut short, and a red ribbon, of what Order I don't
						
						remember. The prosecutor struck me and the others, too, as looking
						
						particularly pale, almost green. His face seemed to have grown
						
						suddenly thinner, perhaps in a single night, for I had seen him
						
						looking as usual only two days before. The President began with asking
						
						the court whether all the jury were present.</p><p id="i_17-p12">    But I see I can't go on like this, partly because some things I
						
						did not hear, others I did not notice, and others I have forgotten,
						
						but most of all because, as I have said before, I have literally no
						
						time or space to mention everything that was said and done. I only
						
						know that neither side objected to very many of the jurymen. I
						
						remember the twelve jurymen- four were petty officials of the town,
						
						two were merchants, and six peasants and artisans of the town. I
						
						remember, long before the trial, questions were continually asked with
						
						some surprise, especially by ladies: "Can such a delicate, complex and
						
						psychological case be submitted for decision to petty officials and
						
						even peasants?" and "What can an official, still more a peasant,
						
						understand in such an affair?" All the four officials in the jury
						
						were, in fact, men of no consequence and of low rank. Except one who
						
						was rather younger, they were grey-headed men, little known in
						
						society, who had vegetated on a pitiful salary, and who probably had
						
						elderly, unpresentable wives and crowds of children, perhaps even
						
						without shoes and stockings. At most, they spent their leisure over
						
						cards and, of course, had never read a single book. The two
						
						merchants looked respectable, but were strangely silent and stolid.</p><p id="i_17-p13">One of them was close-shaven, and was dressed in European style; the
						
						other had a small, grey beard, and wore a red ribbon with some sort of
						
						a medal upon it on his neck. There is no need to speak of the artisans
						
						and the peasants. The artisans of Skotoprigonyevsk are almost
						
						peasants, and even work on the land. Two of them also wore European
						
						dress, and, perhaps for that reason, were dirtier and more
						
						uninviting-looking than the others. So that one might well wonder,
						
						as I did as soon as I had looked at them, "what men like that could
						
						possibly make of such a case?" Yet their faces made a strangely
						
						imposing, almost menacing, impression; they were stern and frowning.</p><p id="i_17-p14">    At last the President opened the case of the murder of Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch Karamazov. I don't quite remember how he described him. The
						
						court usher was told to bring in the prisoner, and Mitya made his
						
						appearance. There was a hush through the court. One could have heard a
						
						fly. I don't know how it was with others, but Mitya made a most
						
						unfavourable impression on me. He looked an awful dandy in a brand-new
						
						frock-coat. I heard afterwards that he had ordered it in Moscow
						
						expressly for the occasion from his own tailor, who had his measure.</p><p id="i_17-p15">He wore immaculate black kid gloves and exquisite linen. He walked
						
						in with his yard-long strides, looking stiffly straight in front of
						
						him, and sat down in his place with a most unperturbed air.</p><p id="i_17-p16">    At the same moment the counsel for defence, the celebrated
						
						Fetyukovitch, entered, and a sort of subdued hum passed through the
						
						court. He was a tall, spare man, with long thin legs, with extremely
						
						long, thin, pale fingers, clean-shaven face, demurely brushed,
						
						rather short hair, and thin lips that were at times curved into
						
						something between a sneer and a smile. He looked about forty. His face
						
						would have been pleasant, if it had not been for his eyes, which, in
						
						themselves small and inexpressive, were set remarkably close together,
						
						with only the thin, long nose as a dividing line between them. In
						
						fact, there was something strikingly birdlike about his face. He was
						
						in evening dress and white tie.</p><p id="i_17-p17">    I remember the President's first questions to Mitya, about his
						
						name, his calling, and so on. Mitya answered sharply, and his voice
						
						was so unexpectedly loud that it made the President start and look
						
						at the prisoner with surprise. Then followed a list of persons who
						
						were to take part in the proceedings- that is, of the witnesses and
						
						experts. It was a long list. Four of the witnesses were not present-
						
						Miusov, who had given evidence at the preliminary inquiry, but was now
						
						in Paris; Madame Hohlakov and Maximov, who were absent through
						
						illness; and Smerdyakov, through his sudden death, of which an
						
						official statement from the police was presented. The news of
						
						Smerdyakov's death produced a sudden stir and whisper in the court.</p><p id="i_17-p18">Many of the audience, of course, had not heard of the sudden
						
						suicide. What struck people most was Mitya's sudden outburst. As
						
						soon as the statement of Smerdyakov's death was made, he cried out
						
						aloud from his place:
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p19">"He was a dog and died like a dog!"
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p20">I remember how his counsel rushed to him, and how the President
						
						addressed him, threatening to take stern measures, if such an
						
						irregularity were repeated. Mitya nodded and in a subdued voice
						
						repeated several times abruptly to his counsel, with no show of
						
						regret:
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p21">"I won't again, I won't. It escaped me. I won't do it again."
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p22">And, of course, this brief episode did him no good with the jury
						
						or the public. His character was displayed, and it spoke for itself.</p><p id="i_17-p23">It was under the influence of this incident that the opening statement
						
						was read. It was rather short, but circumstantial. It only stated
						
						the chief reasons why he had been arrested, why he must be tried,
						
						and so on. Yet it made a great impression on me. The clerk read it
						
						loudly and distinctly. The whole tragedy was suddenly unfolded
						
						before us, concentrated, in bold relief, in a fatal and pitiless
						
						light. I remember how, immediately after it had been read, the
						
						President asked Mitya in a loud impressive voice:
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p24">"Prisoner, do you plead guilty?"
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p25">Mitya suddenly rose from his seat.</p><p id="i_17-p26">    "I plead guilty to drunkenness and dissipation," he exclaimed,
						
						again in a startling, almost frenzied, voice, "to idleness and
						
						debauchery. I meant to become an honest man for good, just at the
						
						moment when I was struck down by fate. But I am not guilty of the
						
						death of that old man, my enemy and my father. No, no, I am not guilty
						
						of robbing him! I could not be. Dmitri Karamazov is a scoundrel, but
						
						not a thief."
						
							</p><p id="i_17-p27">He sat down again, visibly trembling all over. The President again
						
						briefly, but impressively, admonished him to answer only what was
						
						asked, and not to go off into irrelevant exclamations. Then he ordered
						
						the case to proceed. All the witnesses were led up to take the oath.</p><p id="i_17-p28">Then I saw them all together. The brothers of the prisoner were,
						
						however, allowed to give evidence without taking the oath. After an
						
						exhortation from the priest and the President, the witnesses were
						
						led away and were made to sit as far as possible apart from one
						
						another. Then they began calling them up one by one.</p>
					
					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 2 - Dangerous Witnesses" prev="i_17" next="iii_16" id="ii_16">
					


							<p id="ii_16-p1">I DO NOT know whether the witnesses for the defence and for the
						
						prosecution were separated into groups by the President, and whether
						
						it was arranged to call them in a certain order. But no doubt it was
						
						so. I only know that the witnesses for the prosecution were called
						
						first. I repeat I don't intend to describe all the questions step by
						
						step. Besides, my account would be to some extent superfluous, because
						
						in the speeches for the prosecution and for the defence the whole
						
						course of the evidence was brought together and set in a strong and
						
						significant light, and I took down parts of those two remarkable
						
						speeches in full, and will quote them in due course, together with one
						
						extraordinary and quite unexpected episode, which occurred before
						
						the final speeches, and undoubtedly influenced the sinister and
						
						fatal outcome of the trial.</p><p id="ii_16-p2">    I will only observe that from the first moments of the trial one
						
						peculiar characteristic of the case was conspicuous and observed by
						
						all, that is, the overwhelming strength of the prosecution as compared
						
						with the arguments the defence had to rely upon. Everyone realised
						
						it from the first moment that the facts began to group themselves
						
						round a single point, and the whole horrible and bloody crime was
						
						gradually revealed. Everyone, perhaps, felt from the first that the
						
						case was beyond dispute, that there was no doubt about it, that
						
						there could be really no discussion, and that the defence was only a
						
						matter of form, and that the prisoner was guilty, obviously and
						
						conclusively guilty. I imagine that even the ladies, who were so
						
						impatiently longing for the acquittal of the interesting prisoner,
						
						were at the same time, without exception, convinced of his guilt.</p><p id="ii_16-p3">What's more, I believe they would have been mortified if his guilt had
						
						not been so firmly established, as that would have lessened the effect
						
						of the closing scene of the criminal's acquittal. That he would be
						
						acquitted, all the ladies, strange to say, were firmly persuaded up to
						
						the very last moment. "He is guilty, but he will be acquitted, from
						
						motives of humanity, in accordance with the new ideas, the new
						
						sentiments that had come into fashion," and so on, and so on. And that
						
						was why they had crowded into the court so impatiently. The men were
						
						more interested in the contest between the prosecutor and the famous
						
						Fetyukovitch. All were wondering and asking themselves what could even
						
						a talent like Fetyukovitch's make of such a desperate case; and so
						
						they followed his achievements, step by step, with concentrated
						
						attention.</p><p id="ii_16-p4">    But Fetyukovitch remained an enigma to all up to the very end,
						
						up to his speech. Persons of experience suspected that he had some
						
						design, that he was working towards some object, but it was almost
						
						impossible to guess what it was. His confidence and self-reliance were
						
						unmistakable, however. Everyone noticed with pleasure, moreover,
						
						that he, after so short a stay, not more than three days, perhaps,
						
						among us, had so wonderfully succeeded in mastering the case and
						
						"had studied it to a nicety." People described with relish,
						
						afterwards, how cleverly he had "taken down" all the witnesses for the
						
						prosecution, and as far as possible perplexed them and, what's more,
						
						had aspersed their reputation and so depreciated the value of their
						
						evidence. But it was supposed that he did this rather by way of sport,
						
						so to speak, for professional glory, to show nothing had been
						
						omitted of the accepted methods, for all were convinced that he
						
						could do no real good by such disparagement of the witnesses, and
						
						probably was more aware of this than anyone, having some idea of his
						
						own in the background, some concealed weapon of defence, which he
						
						would suddenly reveal when the time came. But meanwhile, conscious
						
						of his strength, he seemed to be diverting himself.</p><p id="ii_16-p5">    So, for instance, when Grigory, Fyodor Pavlovitch's old servant,
						
						who had given the most damning piece of evidence about the open
						
						door, was examined, the counsel for the defence positively fastened
						
						upon him when his turn came to question him. It must be noted that
						
						Grigory entered the trial with a composed and almost stately air,
						
						not the least disconcerted by the majesty of the court or the vast
						
						audience listening to him. He gave evidence with as much confidence as
						
						though he had been talking with his Marfa, only perhaps more
						
						respectfully. It was impossible to make him contradict himself. The
						
						prosecutor questioned him first in detail about the family life of the
						
						Karamazovs. The family picture stood out in lurid colours. It was
						
						plain to ear and eye that the witness was guileless and impartial.</p><p id="ii_16-p6">In spite of his profound reverence for the memory of his deceased
						
						master, he yet bore witness that he had been unjust to Mitya and
						
						"hadn't brought up his children as he should. He'd have been
						
						devoured by lice when he was little, if it hadn't been for me," he
						
						added, describing Mitya's early childhood. "It wasn't fair either of
						
						the father to wrong his son over his mother's property, which was by
						
						right his."</p><p id="ii_16-p7">    In reply to the prosecutor's question what grounds he had for
						
						asserting that Fyodor Pavlovitch had wronged his son in their money
						
						relations, Grigory, to the surprise of everyone, had no proof at all
						
						to bring forward, but he still persisted that the arrangement with the
						
						son was "unfair," and that he ought "to have paid him several thousand
						
						roubles more." I must note, by the way, that the prosecutor asked this
						
						question (whether Fyodor Pavlovitch had really kept back part of
						
						Mitya's inheritance) with marked persistence of all the witnesses
						
						who could be asked it, not excepting Alyosha and Ivan, but he obtained
						
						no exact information from anyone; all alleged that it was so, but were
						
						unable to bring forward any distinct proof. Grigory's description of
						
						the scene at the dinner-table, when Dmitri had burst in and beaten his
						
						father, threatening to come back to kill him, made a sinister
						
						impression on the court, especially as the old servant's composure
						
						in telling it, his parsimony of words, and peculiar phraseology were
						
						as effective as eloquence. He observed that he was not angry with
						
						Mitya for having knocked him down and struck him on the face; he had
						
						forgiven him long ago, he said. Of the deceased Smerdyakov he
						
						observed, crossing himself, that he was a lad of ability, but stupid
						
						and afflicted, and, worse still, an infidel, and that it was Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch and his elder son who had taught him to be so. But he
						
						defended Smerdyakov's honesty almost with warmth, and related how
						
						Smerdyakov had once found the master's money in the yard, and, instead
						
						of concealing it, had taken it to his master, who had rewarded him
						
						with a "gold piece" for it, and trusted him implicitly from that
						
						time forward. He maintained obstinately that the door into the
						
						garden had been open. But he was asked so many questions that I
						
						can't recall them all.</p><p id="ii_16-p8">    At last the counsel for the defence began to cross-examine him,
						
						and the first question he asked was about the envelope in which Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch was supposed to have put three thousand roubles for "a
						
						certain person." "Have you ever seen it, you, who were for so many
						
						years in close attendance on your master?" Grigory answered that he
						
						had not seen it and had never heard of the money from anyone "till
						
						everybody was talking about it." This question about the envelope
						
						Fetyukovitch put to everyone who could conceivably have known of it,
						
						as persistently as the prosecutor asked his question about Dmitri's
						
						inheritance, and got the same answer from all, that no one had seen
						
						the envelope, though many had heard of it. From the beginning everyone
						
						noticed Fetyukovitch's persistence on this subject.</p><p id="ii_16-p9">    "Now, with your permission I'll ask you a question,"</p><p id="ii_16-p10">Fetyukovitch said, suddenly and unexpectedly. "Of what was that
						
						balsam, or, rather, decoction, made, which, as we learn from the
						
						preliminary inquiry, you used on that evening to rub your lumbago,
						
						in the hope of curing it?"</p><p id="ii_16-p11">    Grigory looked blankly at the questioner, and after a brief
						
						silence muttered, "There was saffron in it."</p><p id="ii_16-p12">    "Nothing but saffron? Don't you remember any other ingredient?"</p><p id="ii_16-p13">    "There was milfoil in it, too."</p><p id="ii_16-p14">    "And pepper perhaps?" Fetyukovitch queried.</p><p id="ii_16-p15">    "Yes, there was pepper, too."</p><p id="ii_16-p16">    "Etcetera. And all dissolved in vodka?"</p><p id="ii_16-p17">    "In spirit."</p><p id="ii_16-p18">    There was a faint sound of laughter in the court.</p><p id="ii_16-p19">    "You see, in spirit. After rubbing your back, I believe, you drank
						
						what was left in the bottle with a certain pious prayer, only known to
						
						your wife?"</p><p id="ii_16-p20">    "I did."</p><p id="ii_16-p21">    "Did you drink much? Roughly speaking, a wine-glass or two?"</p><p id="ii_16-p22">    "It might have been a tumbler-full."</p><p id="ii_16-p23">    "A tumbler-full, even. Perhaps a tumbler and a half?"</p><p id="ii_16-p24">    Grigory did not answer. He seemed to see what was meant.</p><p id="ii_16-p25">    "A glass and a half of neat spirit- is not at all bad, don't you
						
						think? You might see the gates of heaven open, not only the door
						
						into the garden?"</p><p id="ii_16-p26">    Grigory remained silent. There was another laugh in the court. The
						
						President made a movement.</p><p id="ii_16-p27">    "Do you know for a fact," Fetyukovitch persisted, "whether you
						
						were awake or not when you saw the open door?"</p><p id="ii_16-p28">    "I was on my legs."</p><p id="ii_16-p29">    "That's not a proof that you were awake." (There was again
						
						laughter in the court.) "Could you have answered at that moment, if
						
						anyone had asked you a question- for instance, what year it is?"</p><p id="ii_16-p30">    "I don't know."</p><p id="ii_16-p31">    "And what year is it, Anno Domini, do you know?"</p><p id="ii_16-p32">    Grigory stood with a perplexed face, looking straight at his
						
						tormentor. Strange to say, it appeared he really did not know what
						
						year it was.</p><p id="ii_16-p33">    "But perhaps you can tell me how many fingers you have on your
						
						hands?"</p><p id="ii_16-p34">    "I am a servant," Grigory said suddenly, in a loud and distinct
						
						voice. "If my betters think fit to make game of me, it is my duty to
						
						suffer it."</p><p id="ii_16-p35">    Fetyukovitch was a little taken aback, and the President
						
						intervened, reminding him that he must ask more relevant questions.</p><p id="ii_16-p36">Fetyukovitch bowed with dignity and said that he had no more questions
						
						to ask of the witness. The public and the jury, of course, were left
						
						with a grain of doubt in their minds as to the evidence of a man who
						
						might, while undergoing a certain cure, have seen "the gates of
						
						heaven," and who did not even know what year he was living in. But
						
						before Grigory left the box another episode occurred. The President,
						
						turning to the prisoner, asked him whether he had any comment to
						
						make on the evidence of the last witness.</p><p id="ii_16-p37">    "Except about the door, all he has said is true," cried Mitya,
						
						in a loud voice. "For combing the lice off me, I thank him; for
						
						forgiving my blows, I thank him. The old man has been honest all his
						
						life and as faithful to my father as seven hundred poodles."</p><p id="ii_16-p38">    "Prisoner, be careful in your language," the President
						
						admonished him.</p><p id="ii_16-p39">    "I am not a poodle," Grigory muttered.</p><p id="ii_16-p40">    "All right, it's I am a poodle myself," cried Mitya. "If it's an
						
						insult, I take it to myself and I beg his pardon. I was a beast and
						
						cruel to him. I was cruel to Aesop too."</p><p id="ii_16-p41">    "What Aesop?" the President asked sternly again.</p><p id="ii_16-p42">    "Oh, Pierrot... my father, Fyodor Pavlovitch."</p><p id="ii_16-p43">    The President again and again warned Mitya impressively and very
						
						sternly to be more careful in his language.</p><p id="ii_16-p44">    "You are injuring yourself in the opinion of your judges."</p><p id="ii_16-p45">    The counsel for the defence was equally clever in dealing with the
						
						evidence of Rakitin. I may remark that Rakitin was one of the
						
						leading witnesses and one to whom the prosecutor attached great
						
						significance. It appeared that he knew everything; his knowledge was
						
						amazing, he had been everywhere, seen everything, talked to everybody,
						
						knew every detail of the biography of Fyodor Pavlovitch and all the
						
						Karamazovs. Of the envelope, it is true, he had only heard from
						
						Mitya himself. But he described minutely Mitya's exploits in the
						
						Metropolis, all his compromising doings and sayings, and told the
						
						story of Captain Snegiryov's "wisp of tow." But even Rakitin could say
						
						nothing positive about Mitya's inheritance, and confined himself to
						
						contemptuous generalities.</p><p id="ii_16-p46">    "Who could tell which of them was to blame, and which was in
						
						debt to the other, with their crazy Karamazov way of muddling things
						
						so that no one could make head or tail of it?" He attributed the
						
						tragic crime to the habits that had become ingrained by ages of
						
						serfdom and the distressed condition of Russia, due to the lack of
						
						appropriate institutions. He was, in fact, allowed some latitude of
						
						speech. This was the first occasion on which Rakitin showed what he
						
						could do, and attracted notice. The prosecutor knew that the witness
						
						was preparing a magazine article on the case, and afterwards in his
						
						speech, as we shall see later, quoted some ideas from the article,
						
						showing that he had seen it already. The picture drawn by the
						
						witness was a gloomy and sinister one, and greatly strengthened the
						
						case for the prosecution. Altogether, Rakatin's discourse fascinated
						
						the public by its independence and the extraordinary nobility of its
						
						ideas. There were even two or three outbreaks of applause when he
						
						spoke of serfdom and the distressed condition of Russia.</p><p id="ii_16-p47">    But Rakitin, in his youthful ardour, made a slight blunder, of
						
						which the counsel for the defence at once adroitly took advantage.</p><p id="ii_16-p48">Answering certain questions about Grushenka and carried away by the
						
						loftiness of his own sentiments and his success, of which he was, of
						
						course, conscious, he went so far as to speak somewhat
						
						contemptuously of Agrafena Alexandrovna as "the kept mistress of
						
						Samsonov." He would have given a good deal to take back his words
						
						afterwards, for Fetyukovitch caught him out over it at once. And it
						
						was all because Rakitin had not reckoned on the lawyer having been
						
						able to become so intimately acquainted with every detail in so
						
						short a time.</p><p id="ii_16-p49">    "Allow me to ask," began the counsel for the defence, with the
						
						most affable and even respectful smile, "you are, of course, the
						
						same Mr. Rakitin whose pamphlet, The Life of the Deceased Elder,
						
						Father Zossima, published by the diocesan authorities, full of
						
						profound and religious reflections and preceded by an excellent and
						
						devout dedication to the bishop, I have just read with such pleasure?"</p><p id="ii_16-p50">    "I did not write it for publication... it was published
						
						afterwards," muttered Rakitin, for some reason fearfully
						
						disconcerted and almost ashamed.</p><p id="ii_16-p51">    "Oh, that's excellent! A thinker like you can, and indeed ought
						
						to, take the widest view of every social question. Your most
						
						instructive pamphlet has been widely circulated through the
						
						patronage of the bishop, and has been of appreciable service.... But
						
						this is the chief thing I should like to learn from you. You stated
						
						just now that you were very intimately acquainted with Madame
						
						Svyetlov." (It must be noted that Grushenka's surname was Svyetlov.</p><p id="ii_16-p52">I heard it for the first time that day, during the case.)
						
							"I cannot answer for all my acquaintances.... I am a young
						
						man... and who can be responsible for everyone he meets?" cried
						
						Rakitin, flushing all over.</p><p id="ii_16-p53">    "I understand, I quite understand," cried Fetyukovitch; as
						
						though he, too, were embarrassed and in haste to excuse himself. "You,
						
						like any other, might well be interested in an acquaintance with a
						
						young and beautiful woman who would readily entertain the elite of the
						
						youth of the neighbourhood, but... I only wanted to know... It has
						
						come to my knowledge, that Madame Svyetlov was particularly anxious
						
						a couple of months ago to make the acquaintance of the younger
						
						Karamazov, Alexey Fyodorovitch, and promised you twenty-five
						
						roubles, if you would bring him to her in his monastic dress. And that
						
						actually took place on the evening of the day on which the terrible
						
						crime, which is the subject of the present investigation, was
						
						committed. You brought Alexey Karamazov to Madame Svyetlov, and did
						
						you receive the twenty-five roubles from Madame Svyetlov as a
						
						reward, that's what I wanted to hear from you?"</p><p id="ii_16-p54">    "It was a joke.... I don't, see of what interest that can be to
						
						you.... I took it for a joke... meaning to give it back later..."</p><p id="ii_16-p55">    "Then you did take- but you have not given it back yet... or
						
						have you?"</p><p id="ii_16-p56">    "That's of no consequence," muttered Rakitin, "I refuse to
						
						answer such questions.... Of course, I shall give it back."</p><p id="ii_16-p57">    The President intervened, but Fetyukovitch declared he had no more
						
						questions to ask of the witness. Mr. Rakitin left the witness-box
						
						not absolutely without a stain upon his character. The effect left
						
						by the lofty idealism of his speech was somewhat marred, and
						
						Fetyukovitch's expression, as he watched him walk away, seemed to
						
						suggest to the public "this is a specimen of the lofty-minded
						
						persons who accuse him." I remember that this incident, too, did not
						
						pass off without an outbreak from Mitya. Enraged by the tone in
						
						which Rakitin had referred to Grushenka, he suddenly shouted
						
						"Bernard!" When, after Rakitin's cross-examination, the President
						
						asked the prisoner if he had anything to say, Mitya cried loudly:</p><p id="ii_16-p58">    "Since I've been arrested, he has borrowed money from me! He is
						
						a contemptible Bernard and opportunist, and he doesn't believe in God;
						
						he took the bishop in!"</p><p id="ii_16-p59">    Mitya of course, was pulled up again for the intemperance of his
						
						language, but Rakitin was done for. Captain Snegiryov's evidence was a
						
						failure, too, but from quite a different reason. He appeared in ragged
						
						and dirty clothes, muddy boots, and in spite of the vigilance and
						
						expert observation of the police officers, he turned out to be
						
						hopelessly drunk. On being asked about Mitya's attack upon him, he
						
						refused to answer.</p><p id="ii_16-p60">    "God bless him. Ilusha told me not to. God will make it up to me
						
						yonder."</p><p id="ii_16-p61">    "Who told you not to tell? Of whom are you talking?"</p><p id="ii_16-p62">    "Ilusha, my little son. 'Father, father, how he insulted you!'
						
						He said that at the stone. Now he is dying..."</p><p id="ii_16-p63">    The captain suddenly began sobbing, and plumped down on His
						
						knees before the President. He was hurriedly led away amidst the
						
						laughter of the public. The effect prepared by the prosecutor did
						
						not come off at all.</p><p id="ii_16-p64">    Fetyukovitch went on making the most of every opportunity, and
						
						amazed people more and more by his minute knowledge of the case. Thus,
						
						for example, Trifon Borissovitch made a great impression, of course,
						
						very prejudicial to Mitya. He calculated almost on his fingers that on
						
						his first visit to Mokroe, Mitya must have spent three thousand
						
						roubles, "or very little less. Just think what he squandered on
						
						those gypsy girls alone! And as for our lousy peasants, it wasn't a
						
						case of flinging half a rouble in the street, he made them presents of
						
						twenty-five roubles each, at least, he didn't give them less. And what
						
						a lot of money was simply stolen from him! And if anyone did steal, he
						
						did not leave a receipt. How could one catch the thief when he was
						
						flinging his money away all the time? Our peasants are robbers, you
						
						know; they have no care for their souls. And the way he went on with
						
						the girls, our village girls! They're completely set up since then,
						
						I tell you, they used to be poor." He recalled, in fact, every item of
						
						expense and added it all up. So the theory that only fifteen hundred
						
						had been spent and the rest had been put aside in a little bag
						
						seemed inconceivable.</p><p id="ii_16-p65">    "I saw three thousand as clear as a penny in his hands, I saw it
						
						with my own eyes; I should think I ought to know how to reckon money,"</p><p id="ii_16-p66">cried Trifon Borissovitch, doing his best to satisfy "his betters."</p><p id="ii_16-p67">    When Fetyukovitch had to cross-examine him, he scarcely tried to
						
						refute his evidence, but began asking him about an incident at the
						
						first carousal at Mokroe, a month before the arrest, when Timofey
						
						and another peasant called Akim had picked up on the floor in the
						
						passage a hundred roubles dropped by Mitya when he was drunk, and
						
						had given them to Trifon Borissovitch and received a rouble each
						
						from him for doing so. "Well," asked the lawyer," did you give that
						
						hundred roubles back to Mr. Karamazov?" Trifon Borissovitch shuffled
						
						in vain.... He was obliged, after the peasants had been examined, to
						
						admit the finding of the hundred roubles, only adding that he had
						
						religiously returned it all to Dmitri Fyodorovitch "in perfect
						
						honesty, and it's only because his honour was in liquor at the time,
						
						he wouldn't remember it." But, as he had denied the incident of the
						
						hundred roubles till the peasants had been called to prove it, his
						
						evidence as to returning the money to Mitya was naturally regarded
						
						with great suspicion. So one of the most dangerous witnesses brought
						
						forward by the prosecution was again discredited.</p><p id="ii_16-p68">    The same thing happened with the Poles. They took up an attitude
						
						of pride and independence; they vociferated loudly that they had
						
						both been in the service of the Crown, and that "Pan Mitya" had
						
						offered them three thousand "to buy their honour," and that they had
						
						seen a large sum of money in his hands. Pan Mussyalovitch introduced a
						
						terrible number of Polish words into his sentences, and seeing that
						
						this only increased his consequence in the eyes of the President and
						
						the prosecutor, grew more and more pompous, and ended by talking in
						
						Polish altogether. But Fetyukovitch caught them, too, in his snares.</p><p id="ii_16-p69">Trifon Borissovitch, recalled, was forced, in spite of his evasions,
						
						to admit that Pan Vrublevsky had substituted another pack of cards for
						
						the one he had provided, and that Pan Mussyalovitch had cheated during
						
						the game. Kalgonov confirmed this, and both the Poles left the
						
						witness-box with damaged reputations, amidst laughter from the public.</p><p id="ii_16-p70">    Then exactly the same thing happened with almost all the most
						
						dangerous witnesses. Fetyukovitch succeeded in casting a slur on all
						
						of them, and dismissing them with a certain derision. The lawyers
						
						and experts were lost in admiration, and were only at a loss to
						
						understand what good purpose could be served by it, for all, I repeat,
						
						felt that the case for the prosecution could not be refuted, but was
						
						growing more and more tragically overwhelming. But from the confidence
						
						of the "great magician" they saw that he was serene, and they
						
						waited, feeling that "such a man" had not come from Petersburg for
						
						nothing, and that he was not a man to return unsuccessful.</p>					
					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 3 - The Medical Experts and a Pound of Nuts" prev="ii_16" next="iv_11" id="iii_16">
					


							<p id="iii_16-p1">THE evidence of the medical experts, too, was of little use to the
						
						prisoner. And it appeared later that Fetyukovitch had not reckoned
						
						much upon it. The medical line of defence had only been taken up
						
						through the insistence of Katerina Ivanovna, who had sent for a
						
						celebrated doctor from Moscow on purpose. The case for the defence
						
						could, of course, lose nothing by it and might, with luck, gain
						
						something from it. There was, however, an element of comedy about
						
						it, through the difference of opinion of the doctors. The medical
						
						experts were the famous doctor from Moscow, our doctor, Herzenstube,
						
						and the young doctor, Varvinsky. The two latter appeared also as
						
						witnesses for the prosecution.</p><p id="iii_16-p2">    The first to be called in the capacity of expert was Doctor
						
						Herzenstube. He was a grey and bald old man of seventy, of middle
						
						height and sturdy build. He was much esteemed and respected by
						
						everyone in the town. He was a conscientious doctor and an excellent
						
						and pious man, a Hernguter or Moravian brother, I am not quite sure
						
						which. He had been living amongst us for many years and behaved with
						
						wonderful dignity. He was a kind-hearted and humane man. He treated
						
						the sick poor and peasants for nothing, visited them in their slums
						
						and huts, and left money for medicine, but he was as obstinate as a
						
						mule. If once he had taken an idea into his head, there was no shaking
						
						it. Almost everyone in the town was aware, by the way, that the famous
						
						doctor had, within the first two or three days of his presence among
						
						us, uttered some extremely offensive allusions to Doctor Herzenstube's
						
						qualifications. Though the Moscow doctor asked twenty-five roubles for
						
						a visit, several people in the town were glad to take advantage of his
						
						arrival, and rushed to consult him regardless of expense. All these
						
						had, of course, been previously patients of Doctor Herzenstube, and
						
						the celebrated doctor had criticised his treatment with extreme
						
						harshness. Finally, he had asked the patients as soon as he saw
						
						them, "Well, who has been cramming you with nostrums? Herzenstube?
						
						He he!" Doctor Herzenstube, of course, heard all this, and now all the
						
						three doctors made their appearance, one after another, to be
						
						examined.</p><p id="iii_16-p3">    Doctor Herzenstube roundly declared that the abnormality of the
						
						prisoner's mental faculties was self-evident. Then giving his
						
						grounds for this opinion, which I omit here, he added that the
						
						abnormality was not only evident in many of the prisoner's actions
						
						in the past, but was apparent even now at this very moment. When he
						
						was asked to explain how it was apparent now at this moment, the old
						
						doctor, with simple-hearted directness, pointed out that the
						
						prisoner had "an extraordinary air, remarkable in the
						
						circumstances"; that he had "marched in like a soldier, looking
						
						straight before him, though it would have been more natural for him to
						
						look to the left where, among the public, the ladies were sitting,
						
						seeing that he was a great admirer of the fair sex and must be
						
						thinking much of what the ladies are saying of him now," the old man
						
						concluded in his peculiar language.</p><p id="iii_16-p4">    I must add that he spoke Russian readily, but every phrase was
						
						formed in German style, which did not, however, trouble him, for it
						
						had always been a weakness of his to believe that he spoke Russian
						
						perfectly, better indeed than Russians. And he was very fond of
						
						using Russian proverbs, always declaring that the Russian proverbs
						
						were the best and most expressive sayings in the whole world. I may
						
						remark, too, that in conversation, through absent-mindedness he
						
						often forgot the most ordinary words, which sometimes went out of
						
						his head, though he knew them perfectly. The same thing happened,
						
						though, when he spoke German, and at such times he always waved his
						
						hand before his face as though trying to catch the lost word, and no
						
						one could induce him to go on speaking till he had found the missing
						
						word. His remark that the prisoner ought to have looked at the
						
						ladies on entering roused a whisper of amusement in the audience.</p><p id="iii_16-p5">All our ladies were very fond of our old doctor; they knew, too,
						
						that having been all his life a bachelor and a religious man of
						
						exemplary conduct, he looked upon women as lofty creatures. And so his
						
						unexpected observation struck everyone as very queer.</p><p id="iii_16-p6">    The Moscow doctor, being questioned in his turn, definitely and
						
						emphatically repeated that he considered the prisoner's mental
						
						condition abnormal in the highest degree. He talked at length and with
						
						erudition of "aberration" and "mania," and argued that, from all the
						
						facts collected, the prisoner had undoubtedly been in a condition of
						
						aberration for several days before his arrest, and, if the crime had
						
						been committed by him, it must, even if he were conscious of it,
						
						have been almost involuntary, as he had not the power to control the
						
						morbid impulse that possessed him.</p><p id="iii_16-p7">    But apart from temporary aberration, the doctor diagnosed mania,
						
						which promised, in his words, to lead to complete insanity in the
						
						future. (It must be noted that I report this in my own words, the
						
						doctor made use of very learned and professional language.) "All his
						
						actions are in contravention of common sense and logic," he continued.</p><p id="iii_16-p8">"Not to refer to what I have not seen, that is, the crime itself and
						
						the whole catastrophe, the day before yesterday, while he was
						
						talking to me, he had an unaccountably fixed look in his eye. He
						
						laughed unexpectedly when there was nothing to laugh at. He showed
						
						continual and inexplicable irritability, using strange words,
						
						'Bernard!' 'Ethics!' and others equally inappropriate." But the doctor
						
						detected mania, above all, in the fact that the prisoner could not
						
						even speak of the three thousand roubles, of which he considered
						
						himself to have been cheated, without extraordinary irritation, though
						
						he could speak comparatively lightly of other misfortunes and
						
						grievances. According to all accounts, he had even in the past,
						
						whenever the subject of the three thousand roubles was touched on,
						
						flown into a perfect frenzy, and yet he was reported to be a
						
						disinterested and not grasping man.</p><p id="iii_16-p9">    "As to the opinion of my learned colleague," the Moscow doctor
						
						added ironically in conclusion "that the prisoner would, entering
						
						the court, have naturally looked at the ladies and not straight before
						
						him, I will only say that, apart from the playfulness of this
						
						theory, it is radically unsound. For though I fully agree that the
						
						prisoner, on entering the court where his fate will be decided,
						
						would not naturally look straight before him in that fixed way, and
						
						that that may really be a sign of his abnormal mental condition, at
						
						the same time I maintain that he would naturally not look to the
						
						left at the ladies, but, on the contrary, to the right to find his
						
						legal adviser, on whose help all his hopes rest and on whose defence
						
						all his future depends." The doctor expressed his opinion positively
						
						and emphatically.</p><p id="iii_16-p10">    But the unexpected pronouncement of Doctor Varvinsky gave the last
						
						touch of comedy to the difference of opinion between the experts. In
						
						his opinion the prisoner was now, and had been all along, in a
						
						perfectly normal condition, and, although he certainly must have
						
						been in a nervous and exceedingly excited state before his arrest,
						
						this might have been due to several perfectly obvious causes,
						
						jealousy, anger, continual drunkenness, and so on. But this nervous
						
						condition would not involve the mental abberation of which mention had
						
						just been made. As to the question whether the prisoner should have
						
						looked to the left or to the right on entering the court, "in his
						
						modest opinion," the prisoner would naturally look straight before him
						
						on entering the court, as he had in fact done, as that was where the
						
						judges, on whom his fate depended, were sitting. So that it was just
						
						by looking straight before him that he showed his perfectly normal
						
						state of mind at the present. The young doctor concluded his
						
						"modest" testimony with some heat.</p><p id="iii_16-p11">    "Bravo, doctor!" cried Mitya, from his seat, "just so!"</p><p id="iii_16-p12">    Mitya, of course, was checked, but the young doctor's opinion
						
						had a decisive influence on the judges and on the public, and, as
						
						appeared afterwards, everyone agreed with him. But Doctor Herzenstube,
						
						when called as a witness, was quite unexpectedly of use to Mitya. As
						
						an old resident in the town, who had known the Karamazov family for
						
						years, he furnished some facts of great value for the prosecution, and
						
						suddenly, as though recalling something, he added:</p><p id="iii_16-p13">    "But the poor young man might have had a very different life,
						
						for he had a good heart both in childhood and after childhood, that
						
						I know. But the Russian proverb says, 'If a man has one head, it's
						
						good, but if another clever man comes to visit him, it would be better
						
						still, for then there will be two heads and not only one."'
						
							"One head is good, but two are better," the prosecutor put in
						
						impatiently. He knew the old man's habit of talking slowly and
						
						deliberately, regardless of the impression he was making and of the
						
						delay he was causing, and highly prizing his flat, dull and always
						
						gleefully complacent German wit. The old man was fond of making jokes.</p><p id="iii_16-p14">    "Oh, yes, that's what I say," he went on stubbornly. "One head
						
						is good, but two are much better, but he did not meet another head
						
						with wits, and his wits went. Where did they go? I've forgotten the
						
						word." He went on, passing his hand before his eyes, "Oh, yes,
						
						spazieren."*</p><p id="iii_16-p15" /><p id="iii_16-p16">
						
						
						
							* Promenading.</p><p id="iii_16-p17" /><p id="iii_16-p18">
						
							"Wandering?"</p><p id="iii_16-p19">    "Oh, yes, wandering, that's what I say. Well, his wits went
						
						wandering and fell in such a deep hole that he lost himself. And yet
						
						he was a grateful and sensitive boy. Oh, I remember him very well, a
						
						little chap so high, left neglected by his father in the back yard,
						
						when he ran about without boots on his feet, and his little breeches
						
						hanging by one button."</p><p id="iii_16-p20">    A note of feeling and tenderness suddenly came into the honest old
						
						man's voice. Fetyukovitch positively started, as though scenting
						
						something, and caught at it instantly.</p><p id="iii_16-p21">    "Oh, yes, I was a young man then.... I was... well, I was
						
						forty-five then, and had only just come here. And I was so sorry for
						
						the boy then; I asked myself why shouldn't I buy him a pound of... a
						
						pound of what? I've forgotten what it's called. A pound of what
						
						children are very fond of, what is it, what is it?" The doctor began
						
						waving his hands again. "It grows on a tree and is gathered and
						
						given to everyone..."</p><p id="iii_16-p22">    "Apples?"</p><p id="iii_16-p23">    "Oh, no, no. You have a dozen of apples, not a pound.... No, there
						
						are a lot of them, and call little. You put them in the mouth and
						
						crack."</p><p id="iii_16-p24">    "Quite so, nuts, I say so." The doctor repeated in the calmest way
						
						as though he had been at no loss for a word. "And I bought him a pound
						
						of nuts, for no one had ever bought the boy a pound of nuts before.</p><p id="iii_16-p25">And I lifted my finger and said to him, 'Boy, Gott der Vater.' He
						
						laughed and said, 'Gott der Vater'... 'Gott der Sohn.' He laughed
						
						again and lisped 'Gott der Sohn.' 'Gott der heilige Geist.' Then he
						
						laughed and said as best he could, 'Gott der heilige Geist.' I went
						
						away, and two days after I happened to be passing, and he shouted to
						
						me of himself, 'Uncle, Gott der Vater, Gott der Sohn,' and he had only
						
						forgotten 'Gott der heilige Geist.' But I reminded him of it and I
						
						felt very sorry for him again. But he was taken away, and I did not
						
						see him again. Twenty-three years passed. I am sitting one morning
						
						in my study, a white-haired old man, when there walks into the room
						
						a blooming young man, whom I should never have recognised, but he held
						
						up his finger and said, laughing, 'Gott der Vater, Gott der Sohn,
						
						and Gott der heilige Geist. I have just arrived and have come to thank
						
						you for that pound of nuts, for no one else ever bought me a pound
						
						of nuts; you are the only one that ever did.' then I remembered my
						
						happy youth and the poor child in the yard, without boots on his feet,
						
						and my heart was touched and I said, 'You are a grateful young man,
						
						for you have remembered all your life the pound of nuts I bought you
						
						in your childhood.' And I embraced him and blessed him. And I shed
						
						tears. He laughed, but he shed tears, too... for the Russian often
						
						laughs when he ought to be weeping. But he did weep; I saw it. And
						
						now, alas!..."</p><p id="iii_16-p26">    "And I am weeping now, German, I am weeping now, too, you
						
						saintly man," Mitya cried suddenly.</p><p id="iii_16-p27">    In any case the anecdote made a certain favourable impression on
						
						the public. But the chief sensation in Mitya's favour was created by
						
						the evidence of Katerina Ivanovna, which I will describe directly.</p><p id="iii_16-p28">Indeed, when the witnesses a decharge, that is, called the defence,
						
						began giving evidence, fortune seemed all at once markedly more
						
						favourable to Mitya, and what was particularly striking, this was a
						
						surprise even to the counsel for the defence. But before Katerina
						
						Ivanovna was called, Alyosha was examined, and he recalled a fact
						
						which seemed to furnish positive evidence against one important
						
						point made by the prosecution.</p>
					
							
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 4 - Fortune Smiles on Mitya" prev="iii_16" next="v_9" id="iv_11">
					


							<p id="iv_11-p1">IT came quite as a surprise even to Alyosha himself. He was not
						
						required to take the oath, and I remember that both sides addressed
						
						him very gently and sympathetically. It was evident that his
						
						reputation for goodness had preceded him. Alyosha gave his evidence
						
						modestly and with restraint, but his warm sympathy for his unhappy
						
						brother was unmistakable. In answer to one question, he sketched his
						
						brother's character as that of a man, violent-tempered perhaps and
						
						carried away by his passions, but at the same time honourable, proud
						
						and generous, capable of self-sacrifice, if necessary. He admitted,
						
						however, that, through his passion for Grushenka and his rivalry
						
						with his father, his brother had been of late in an intolerable
						
						position. But he repelled with indignation the suggestion that his
						
						brother might have committed a murder for the sake of gain, though
						
						he recognised that the three thousand roubles had become almost an
						
						obsession with Mitya; that upon them as part of the inheritance he had
						
						been cheated of by his father, and that, indifferent as he was to
						
						money as a rule, he could not even speak of that three thousand
						
						without fury. As for the rivalry of the two "ladies," as the
						
						prosecutor expressed it- that is, of Grushenka and Katya- he
						
						answered evasively and was even unwilling to answer one or two
						
						questions altogether.</p><p id="iv_11-p2">    "Did your brother tell you, anyway, that he intended to kill
						
						your father?" asked the prosecutor. "You can refuse to answer if you
						
						think necessary," he added.</p><p id="iv_11-p3">    "He did not tell me so directly," answered Alyosha.</p><p id="iv_11-p4">    "How so? Did he indirectly?"</p><p id="iv_11-p5">    "He spoke to me once of his hatred for our father and his fear
						
						that at an extreme moment... at a moment of fury, he might perhaps
						
						murder him."</p><p id="iv_11-p6">    "And you believed him?"</p><p id="iv_11-p7">    "I am afraid to say that I did. But I never doubted that some
						
						higher feeling would always save him at that fatal moment, as it has
						
						indeed saved him, for it was not he killed my father," Alyosha said
						
						firmly, in a loud voice that was heard throughout the court.</p><p id="iv_11-p8">    The prosecutor started like a war-horse at the sound of a trumpet.</p><p id="iv_11-p9">    "Let me assure you that I fully believe in the complete
						
						sincerity of your conviction and do not explain it by or identify it
						
						with your affection for your unhappy brother. Your peculiar view of
						
						the whole tragic episode is known to us already from the preliminary
						
						investigation. I won't attempt to conceal from you that it is highly
						
						individual and contradicts all the other evidence collected by the
						
						prosecution. And so I think it essential to press you to tell me
						
						what facts have led you to this conviction of your brother's innocence
						
						and of the guilt of another person against whom you gave evidence at
						
						the preliminary inquiry?"</p><p id="iv_11-p10">    "I only answered the questions asked me at the preliminary
						
						inquiry," replied Alyosha, slowly and calmly. "I made no accusation
						
						against Smerdyakov of myself."</p><p id="iv_11-p11">    "Yet you gave evidence against him?"</p><p id="iv_11-p12">    "I was led to do so by my brother Dmitri's words. I was told
						
						what took place at his arrest and how he had pointed to Smerdyakov
						
						before I was examined. I believe absolutely that my brother is
						
						innocent, and if he didn't commit the murder, then-"</p><p id="iv_11-p13">    "Then Smerdyakov? Why Smerdyakov? And why are you so completely
						
						persuaded of your brother's innocence?"</p><p id="iv_11-p14">    "I cannot help believing my brother. I know he wouldn't lie to me.</p><p id="iv_11-p15">I saw from his face he wasn't lying."</p><p id="iv_11-p16">    "Only from his face? Is that all the proof you have?"</p><p id="iv_11-p17">    "I have no other proof."</p><p id="iv_11-p18">    "And of Smerdyakov's guilt you have no proof whatever but your
						
						brother's word and the expression of his face?"</p><p id="iv_11-p19">    "No, I have no other proof."</p><p id="iv_11-p20">    The prosecutor dropped the examination at this point. The
						
						impression left by Alyosha's evidence on the public was most
						
						disappointing. There had been talk about Smerdyakov before the
						
						trial; someone had heard something, someone had pointed out
						
						something else, it was said that Alyosha had gathered together some
						
						extraordinary proofs of his brother's innocence and Smerdyakov's
						
						guilt, and after all there was nothing, no evidence except certain
						
						moral convictions so natural in a brother.</p><p id="iv_11-p21">    But Fetyukovitch began his cross-examination. On his asking
						
						Alyosha when it was that the prisoner had told him of his hatred for
						
						his father and that he might kill him, and whether he had heard it,
						
						for instance, at their last meeting before the catastrophe, Alyosha
						
						started as he answered, as though only just recollecting and
						
						understanding something.</p><p id="iv_11-p22">    "I remember one circumstance now which I'd quite forgotten myself.</p><p id="iv_11-p23">It wasn't clear to me at the time, but now-"</p><p id="iv_11-p24">    And, obviously only now for the first time struck by an idea, he
						
						recounted eagerly how, at his last interview with Mitya that evening
						
						under the tree, on the road to the monastery, Mitya had struck himself
						
						on the breast, "the upper part of the breast," and had repeated
						
						several times that he had a means of regaining his honour, that that
						
						means was here, here on his breast. "I thought, when he struck himself
						
						on the breast, he meant that it was in his heart," Alyosha
						
						continued, "that he might find in his heart strength to save himself
						
						from some awful disgrace which was awaiting him and which he did not
						
						dare confess even to me. I must confess I did think at the time that
						
						he was speaking of our father, and that the disgrace he was shuddering
						
						at was the thought of going to our father and doing some violence to
						
						him. Yet it was just then that he pointed to something on his
						
						breast, so that I remember the idea struck me at the time that the
						
						heart is not on that part of the breast, but below, and that he struck
						
						himself much too high, just below the neck, and kept pointing to
						
						that place. My idea seemed silly to me at the time, but he was perhaps
						
						pointing then to that little bag in which he had fifteen hundred
						
						roubles!"</p><p id="iv_11-p25">    "Just so, Mitya cried from his place. "That's right, Alyosha, it
						
						was the little bag I struck with my fist."</p><p id="iv_11-p26">    Fetyukovitch flew to him in hot haste entreating him to keep
						
						quiet, and at the same instant pounced on Alyosha. Alyosha, carried
						
						away himself by his recollection, warmly expressed his theory that
						
						this disgrace was probably just that fifteen hundred roubles on him,
						
						which he might have returned to Katerina Ivanovna as half of what he
						
						owed her, but which he had yet determined not to repay her and to
						
						use for another purpose- namely, to enable him to elope with
						
						Grushenka, if she consented.</p><p id="iv_11-p27">    "It is so, it must be so," exclaimed Alyosha, in sudden
						
						excitement. "My brother cried several times that half of the disgrace,
						
						half of it (he said half several times) he could free himself from
						
						at once, but that he was so unhappy in his weakness of will that he
						
						wouldn't do it... that he knew beforehand he was incapable of doing
						
						it!"</p><p id="iv_11-p28">    "And you clearly, confidently remember that he struck himself just
						
						on this part of the breast?" Fetyukovitch asked eagerly.</p><p id="iv_11-p29">    "Clearly and confidently, for I thought at the time, 'Why does
						
						he strike himself up there when the heart is lower down?' and the
						
						thought seemed stupid to me at the time... I remember its seeming
						
						stupid... it flashed through my mind. That's what brought it back to
						
						me just now. How could I have forgotten it till now? It was that
						
						little bag he meant when he said he had the means but wouldn't give
						
						back that fifteen hundred. And when he was arrested at Mokroe he cried
						
						out- I know, I was told it- that he considered it the most disgraceful
						
						act of his life that when he had the means of repaying Katerina
						
						Ivanovna half (half, note!) what he owed her, he yet could not bring
						
						himself to repay the money and preferred to remain a thief in her eyes
						
						rather than part with it. And what torture, what torture that debt has
						
						been to him!" Alyosha exclaimed in conclusion.</p><p id="iv_11-p30">    The prosecutor, of course, intervened. He asked Alyosha to
						
						describe once more how it had all happened, and several times insisted
						
						on the question, "Had the prisoner seemed to point to anything?
						
						Perhaps he had simply struck himself with his fist on the breast?"</p><p id="iv_11-p31">    "But it was not with his fist," cried Alyosha; "he pointed with
						
						his fingers and pointed here, very high up.... How could I have so
						
						completely forgotten it till this moment?"</p><p id="iv_11-p32">    The President asked Mitya what he had to say to the last witness's
						
						evidence. Mitya confirmed it, saying that he had been pointing to
						
						the fifteen hundred roubles which were on his breast, just below the
						
						neck, and that that was, of course, the disgrace, "A disgrace I cannot
						
						deny, the most shameful act of my whole life," cried Mitya. "I might
						
						have repaid it and didn't repay it. I preferred to remain a thief in
						
						her eyes rather than give it back. And the most shameful part of it
						
						was that I knew beforehand I shouldn't give it back! You are right,
						
						Alyosha! Thanks, Alyosha!"</p><p id="iv_11-p33">    So Alyosha's cross-examination ended. What was important and
						
						striking about it was that one fact at least had been found, and
						
						even though this were only one tiny bit of evidence, a mere hint at
						
						evidence, it did go some little way towards proving that the bag had
						
						existed and had contained fifteen hundred roubles and that the
						
						prisoner had not been lying at the preliminary inquiry when he alleged
						
						at Mokroe that those fifteen hundred roubles were "his own." Alyosha
						
						was glad. With a flushed face he moved away to the seat assigned to
						
						him. He kept repeating to himself: "How was it I forgot? How could I
						
						have forgotten it? And what made it come back to me now?"</p><p id="iv_11-p34">    Katerina Ivanovna was called to the witness-box. As she entered
						
						something extraordinary happened in the court. The ladies clutched
						
						their lorgnettes and opera-glasses. There was a stir among the men:</p><p id="iv_11-p35">some stood up to get a better view. Everybody alleged afterwards
						
						that Mitya had turned "white as a sheet" on her entrance. All in
						
						black, she advanced modestly, almost timidly. It was impossible to
						
						tell from her face that she was agitated; but there was a resolute
						
						gleam in her dark and gloomy eyes. I may remark that many people
						
						mentioned that she looked particularly handsome at that moment. She
						
						spoke softly but clearly, so that she was heard all over the court.</p><p id="iv_11-p36">She expressed herself with composure, or at least tried to appear
						
						composed. The President began his examination discreetly and very
						
						respectfully, as though afraid to touch on "certain chords," and
						
						showing consideration for her great unhappiness. But in answer to
						
						one of the first questions Katerina Ivanovna replied firmly that she
						
						had been formerly betrothed to the prisoner, "until he left me of
						
						his own accord..." she added quietly. When they asked her about the
						
						three thousand she had entrusted to Mitya to post to her relations,
						
						she said firmly, "I didn't give him the money simply to send it off. I
						
						felt at the time that he was in great need of money.... I gave him the
						
						three thousand on the understanding that he should post it within
						
						the month if he cared to. There was no need for him to worry himself
						
						about that debt afterwards."</p><p id="iv_11-p37">    I will not repeat all the questions asked her and all her
						
						answers in detail. I will only give the substance of her evidence.</p><p id="iv_11-p38">    "I was firmly convinced that he would send off that sum as soon as
						
						he got money from his father," she went on. "I have never doubted
						
						his disinterestedness and his honesty... his scrupulous honesty...</p><p id="iv_11-p39">in money matters. He felt quite certain that he would receive the
						
						money from his father, and spoke to me several times about it. I
						
						knew he had a feud with his father and have always believed that he
						
						had been unfairly treated by his father. I don't remember any threat
						
						uttered by him against his father. He certainly never uttered any such
						
						threat before me. If he had come to me at that time, I should have
						
						at once relieved his anxiety about that unlucky three thousand
						
						roubles, but he had given up coming to see me... and I myself was
						
						put in such a position... that I could not invite him.... And I had no
						
						right, indeed, to be exacting as to that money, she added suddenly,
						
						and there was a ring of resolution in her voice. "I was once
						
						indebted to him for assistance in money for more than three
						
						thousand, and I took it, although I could not at that time foresee
						
						that I should ever be in a position to repay my debt."</p><p id="iv_11-p40">    There was a note of defiance in her voice. It was then
						
						Fetyukovitch began his cross-examination.</p><p id="iv_11-p41">    "Did that take place not here, but at the beginning of your
						
						acquaintance?" Fetyukovitch suggested cautiously, feeling his way,
						
						instantly scenting something favourable. I must mention in parenthesis
						
						that, though Fetyukovitch had been brought from Petersburg partly at
						
						the instance of Katerina Ivanovna herself, he knew nothing about the
						
						episode of the four thousand roubles given her by Mitya, and of her
						
						"bowing to the ground to him." She concealed this from him and said
						
						nothing about it, and that was strange. It may be pretty certainly
						
						assumed that she herself did not know till the very last minute
						
						whether she would speak of that episode in the court, and waited for
						
						the inspiration of the moment.</p><p id="iv_11-p42">    No, I can never forget those moments. She began telling her story.</p><p id="iv_11-p43">She told everything, the whole episode that Mitya had told Alyosha,
						
						and her bowing to the ground, and her reason. She told about her
						
						father and her going to Mitya, and did not in one word, in a single
						
						hint, suggest that Mitya had himself, through her sister, proposed
						
						they should "send him Katerina Ivanovna" to fetch the money. She
						
						generously concealed that and was not ashamed to make it appear as
						
						though she had of her own impulse run to the young officer, relying on
						
						something... to beg him for the money. It was something tremendous!
						
						I turned cold and trembled as I listened. The court was hushed, trying
						
						to catch each word. It was something unexampled. Even from such a
						
						self-willed and contemptuously proud girl as she was, such an
						
						extremely frank avowal, such sacrifice, such self-immolation, seemed
						
						incredible. And for what, for whom? To save the man who had deceived
						
						and insulted her and to help, in however small a degree, in saving
						
						him, by creating a strong impression in his favour. And, indeed, the
						
						figure of the young officer who, with a respectful bow to the innocent
						
						girl, handed her his last four thousand roubles- all he had in the
						
						world- was thrown into a very sympathetic and attractive light, but...</p><p id="iv_11-p44">I had a painful misgiving at heart! I felt that calumny might come
						
						of it later (and it did, in fact, it did). It was repeated all over
						
						the town afterwards with spiteful laughter that was perhaps not
						
						quite complete- that is, in the statement that the officer had let the
						
						young lady depart "with nothing but a respectful bow." It was hinted
						
						that something was here omitted.</p><p id="iv_11-p45">    "And even if nothing had been omitted, if this were the whole
						
						story," the most highly respected of our ladies maintained, "even then
						
						it's very doubtful whether it was creditable for a young girl to
						
						behave in that way, even for the sake of saving her father."</p><p id="iv_11-p46">    And can Katerina Ivanovna, with her intelligence, her morbid
						
						sensitiveness, have failed to understand that people would talk like
						
						that? She must have understood it, yet she made up her mind to tell
						
						everything. Of course, all these nasty little suspicions as to the
						
						truth of her story only arose afterwards and at the first moment all
						
						were deeply impressed by it. As for the judges and the lawyers, they
						
						listened in reverent, almost shamefaced silence to Katerina
						
						Ivanovna. The prosecutor did not venture upon even one question on the
						
						subject. Fetyukovitch made a low bow to her. Oh, he was almost
						
						triumphant! Much ground had been gained. For a man to give his last
						
						four thousand on a generous impulse and then for the same man to
						
						murder his father for the sake of robbing him of three thousand- the
						
						idea seemed too incongruous. Fetyukovitch felt that now the charge
						
						of theft, at least, was as good as disproved. "The case" was thrown
						
						into quite a different light. There was a wave of sympathy for
						
						Mitya. As for him.... I was told that once or twice, while Katerina
						
						Ivanovna was giving her evidence, he jumped up from his seat, sank
						
						back again, and hid his face in his hands. But when she had
						
						finished, he suddenly cried in a sobbing voice:</p><p id="iv_11-p47">    "Katya, why have you ruined me?" and his sobs were audible all
						
						over the court. But he instantly restrained himself, and cried again:</p><p id="iv_11-p48">    "Now I am condemned!"</p><p id="iv_11-p49">    Then he sat rigid in his place, with his teeth clenched and his
						
						arms across his chest. Katerina Ivanovna remained in the court and sat
						
						down in her place. She was pale and sat with her eyes cast down. Those
						
						who were sitting near her declared that for a long time she shivered
						
						all over as though in a fever. Grushenka was called.</p><p id="iv_11-p50">    I am approaching the sudden catastrophe which was perhaps the
						
						final cause of Mitya's ruin. For I am convinced, so is everyone- all
						
						the lawyers said the same afterwards- that if the episode had not
						
						occurred, the prisoner would at least have been recommended to
						
						mercy. But of that later. A few words first about Grushenka.</p><p id="iv_11-p51">    She, too, was dressed entirely in black, with her magnificent
						
						black shawl on her shoulders. She walked to the witness-box with her
						
						smooth, noiseless tread, with the slightly swaying gait common in
						
						women of full figure. She looked steadily at the President, turning
						
						her eyes neither to the right nor to the left. To my thinking she
						
						looked very handsome at that moment, and not at all pale, as the
						
						ladies alleged afterwards. They declared, too, that she had a
						
						concentrated and spiteful expression. I believe that she was simply
						
						irritated and painfully conscious of the contemptuous and
						
						inquisitive eyes of our scandal-loving public. She was proud and could
						
						not stand contempt. She was one of those people who flare up, angry
						
						and eager to retaliate, at the mere suggestion of contempt. There
						
						was an element of timidity, too, of course, and inward shame at her
						
						own timidity, so it was not strange that her tone kept changing. At
						
						one moment it was angry, contemptuous and rough, and at another
						
						there was a sincere note of self-condemnation. Sometimes she spoke
						
						as though she were taking a desperate plunge; as though she felt, "I
						
						don't care what happens, I'll say it...." Apropos of her
						
						acquaintance with Fyodor Pavlovitch, she remarked curtly, "That's
						
						all nonsense, and was it my fault that he would pester me?" But a
						
						minute later she added, "It was all my fault. I was laughing at them
						
						both- at the old man and at him, too- and I brought both of them to
						
						this. It was all on account of me it happened."</p><p id="iv_11-p52">    Samsonov's name came up somehow. "That's nobody's business," she
						
						snapped at once, with a sort of insolent defiance. "He was my
						
						benefactor; he took me when I hadn't a shoe to my foot, when my family
						
						had turned me out." The President reminded her, though very
						
						politely, that she must answer the questions directly, without going
						
						off into irrelevant details. Grushenka crimsoned and her eyes flashed.</p><p id="iv_11-p53">    The envelope with the notes in it she had not seen, but had only
						
						heard from "that wicked wretch" that Fyodor Pavlovitch had an envelope
						
						with notes for three thousand in it. "But that was all foolishness.</p><p id="iv_11-p54">I was only laughing. I wouldn't have gone to him for anything."</p><p id="iv_11-p55">    "To whom are you referring as 'that wicked wretch'?" inquired
						
						the prosecutor.</p><p id="iv_11-p56">    "The lackey, Smerdyakov, who murdered his master and hanged
						
						himself last night."</p><p id="iv_11-p57">    She was, of course, at once asked what ground she had for such a
						
						definite accusation; but it appeared that she, too, had no grounds for
						
						it.</p><p id="iv_11-p58">    "Dmitri Fyodorovitch told me so himself; you can believe him.</p><p id="iv_11-p59">The woman who came between us has ruined him; she is the cause of it
						
						all, let me tell you," Grushenka added. She seemed to be quivering
						
						with hatred, and there was a vindictive note in her voice.</p><p id="iv_11-p60">    She was again asked to whom she was referring.</p><p id="iv_11-p61">    "The young lady, Katerina Ivanovna there. She sent for me, offered
						
						me chocolate, tried to fascinate me. There's not much true shame about
						
						her, I can tell you that..."</p><p id="iv_11-p62">    At this point the President checked her sternly, begging her to
						
						moderate her language. But the jealous woman's heart was burning,
						
						and she did not care what she did.</p><p id="iv_11-p63">    "When the prisoner was arrested at Mokroe," the prosecutor
						
						asked, "everyone saw and heard you run out of the next room and cry
						
						out: 'It's all my fault. We'll go to Siberia together!' So you already
						
						believed him to have murdered his father?"</p><p id="iv_11-p64">    "I don't remember what I felt at the time," answered Grushenka.</p><p id="iv_11-p65">"Everyone was crying out that he had killed his father, and I felt
						
						that it was my fault, that it was on my account he had murdered him.</p><p id="iv_11-p66">But when he said he wasn't guilty, I believed him at once, and I
						
						believe him now and always shall believe him. He is not the man to
						
						tell a lie."</p><p id="iv_11-p67">    Fetyukovitch began his cross-examination. I remember that among
						
						other things he asked about Rakitin and the twenty-five roubles "you
						
						paid him for bringing Alexey Fyodorovitch Karamazov to see you."</p><p id="iv_11-p68">    "There was nothing strange about his taking the money," sneered
						
						Grushenka, with angry contempt. "He was always coming to me for money:</p><p id="iv_11-p69">he used to get thirty roubles a month at least out of me, chiefly
						
						for luxuries: he had enough to keep him without my help."</p><p id="iv_11-p70">    "What led you to be so liberal to Mr. Rakitin?" Fetyukovitch
						
						asked, in spite of an uneasy movement on the part of the President.</p><p id="iv_11-p71">    "Why, he is my cousin. His mother was my mother's sister. But he's
						
						always besought me not to tell anyone here of it, he is so
						
						dreadfully ashamed of me."</p><p id="iv_11-p72">    This fact was a complete surprise to everyone; no one in the
						
						town nor in the monastery, not even Mitya, knew of it. I was told that
						
						Rakitin turned purple with shame where he sat. Grushenka had somehow
						
						heard before she came into the court that he had given evidence
						
						against Mitya, and so she was angry. The whole effect on the public,
						
						of Rakitin's speech, of his noble sentiments, of his attacks upon
						
						serfdom and the political disorder of Russia, was this time finally
						
						ruined. Fetyukovitch was satisfied: it was another godsend.</p><p id="iv_11-p73">Grushenka's cross-examination did not last long and, of course,
						
						there could be nothing particularly new in her evidence. She left a
						
						very disagreeable impression on the public; hundreds of contemptuous
						
						eyes were fixed upon her, as she finished giving her evidence and
						
						sat down again in the court, at a good distance from Katerina
						
						Ivanovna. Mitya was silent throughout her evidence. He sat as though
						
						turned to stone, with his eyes fixed on the ground.</p><p id="iv_11-p74">    Ivan was called to give evidence.</p>				
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 5 - A Sudden Catastrophe" prev="iv_11" next="vi_8" id="v_9">
					

							<p id="v_9-p1">I MAY note that he had been called before Alyosha. But the usher
						
						of the court announced to the President that, owing to an attack of
						
						illness or some sort of fit, the witness could not appear at the
						
						moment, but was ready to give his evidence as soon as he recovered.</p><p id="v_9-p2">But no one seemed to have heard it and it only came out later.</p><p id="v_9-p3">    His entrance was for the first moment almost unnoticed. The
						
						principal witnesses, especially the two rival ladies, had already been
						
						questioned. Curiosity was satisfied for the time; the public was
						
						feeling almost fatigued. Several more witnesses were still to be
						
						heard, who probably had little information to give after all that
						
						had been given. Time was passing. Ivan walked up with extraordinary
						
						slowness, looking at no one, and with his head bowed, as though
						
						plunged in gloomy thought. He was irreproachably dressed, but his face
						
						made a painful impression, on me at least: there was an earthy look in
						
						it, a look like a dying man's. His eyes were lustreless; he raised
						
						them and looked slowly round the court. Alyosha jumped up from his
						
						seat and moaned "Ah!" I remember that, but it was hardly noticed.</p><p id="v_9-p4">    The President began by informing him that he was a witness not
						
						on oath, that he might answer or refuse to answer, but that, of
						
						course, he must bear witness according to his conscience, and so on,
						
						and so on. Ivan listened and looked at him blankly, but his face
						
						gradually relaxed into a smile, and as soon as the President,
						
						looking at him in astonishment, finished, he laughed outright.</p><p id="v_9-p5">    "Well, and what else?" he asked in a loud voice.</p><p id="v_9-p6">    There was a hush in the court; there was a feeling of something
						
						strange. The President showed signs of uneasiness.</p><p id="v_9-p7">    "You... are perhaps still unwell?" he began, looking everywhere
						
						for the usher.</p><p id="v_9-p8">    "Don't trouble yourself, your excellency, I am well enough and can
						
						tell you something interesting," Ivan answered with sudden calmness
						
						and respectfulness.</p><p id="v_9-p9">    "You have some special communication to make?" the President
						
						went on, still mistrustfully.</p><p id="v_9-p10">    Ivan looked down, waited a few seconds and, raising his head,
						
						answered, almost stammering:</p><p id="v_9-p11">    "No... I haven't. I have nothing particular."</p><p id="v_9-p12">    They began asking him questions. He answered, as it were,
						
						reluctantly, with extreme brevity, with a sort of disgust which grew
						
						more and more marked, though he answered rationally. To many questions
						
						he answered that he did not know. He knew nothing of his father's
						
						money relations with Dmitri. "I wasn't interested in the subject," he added. Threats to murder his father he had heard from the prisoner.</p><p id="v_9-p13">Of the money in the envelope he had heard from Smerdyakov.</p><p id="v_9-p14">    "The same thing over and over again," he interrupted suddenly,
						
						with a look of weariness. "I have nothing particular to tell the
						
						court."</p><p id="v_9-p15">    "I see you are unwell and understand your feelings," the President
						
						began.</p><p id="v_9-p16">    He turned to the prosecutor and the counsel for the defence to
						
						invite them to examine the witness, if necessary, when Ivan suddenly
						
						asked in an exhausted voice:</p><p id="v_9-p17">    "Let me go, your excellency, I feel very ill."</p><p id="v_9-p18">    And with these words, without waiting for permission, he turned to
						
						walk out of the court. But after taking four steps he stood still,
						
						as though he had reached a decision, smiled slowly, and went back.</p><p id="v_9-p19">    "I am like the peasant girl, your excellency... you know. How does
						
						it go? 'I'll stand up if I like, and I won't if I don't.' They were
						
						trying to put on her sarafan to take her to church to be married,
						
						and she said, 'I'll stand up if I like, and I won't if I don't.'...</p><p id="v_9-p20">It's in some book about the peasantry."</p><p id="v_9-p21">    "What do you mean by that?" the President asked severely.</p><p id="v_9-p22">    "Why, this," Ivan suddenly pulled out a roll of notes. "Here's the
						
						money... the notes that lay in that envelope" (he nodded towards the
						
						table on which lay the material evidence), "for the sake of which
						
						our father was murdered. Where shall I put them? Mr. Superintendent,
						
						take them."</p><p id="v_9-p23">    The usher of the court took the whole roll and handed it to the
						
						President.</p><p id="v_9-p24">    "How could this money have come into your possession if it is
						
						the same money?" the President asked wonderingly.</p><p id="v_9-p25">    "I got them from Smerdyakov, from the murderer, yesterday.... I
						
						was with him just before he hanged himself. It was he, not my brother,
						
						killed our father. He murdered him and I incited him to do it... Who
						
						doesn't desire his father's death?"</p><p id="v_9-p26">    "Are you in your right mind?" broke involuntarily from the
						
						President.</p><p id="v_9-p27">    "I should think I am in my right mind... in the same nasty mind as
						
						all of you... as all these... ugly faces." He turned suddenly to the
						
						audience. "My father has been murdered and they pretend they are
						
						horrified," he snarled, with furious contempt. "They keep up the
						
						sham with one another. Liars! They all desire the death of their
						
						fathers. One reptile devours another.... If there hadn't been a
						
						murder, they'd have been angry and gone home ill-humoured. It's a
						
						spectacle they want! Panem et circenses.* Though I am one to talk!
						
						Have you any water? Give me a drink for Christ's sake!" He suddenly
						
						clutched his head.</p><p id="v_9-p28" /><p id="v_9-p29">
						
							* Bread and circuses.</p><p id="v_9-p30" /><p id="v_9-p31">
						
							The usher at once approached him. Alyosha jumped up and cried, "He
						
						is ill. Don't believe him: he has brain fever." Katerina Ivanovna rose
						
						impulsively from her seat and, rigid with horror, gazed at Ivan. Mitya
						
						stood up and greedily looked at his brother and listened to him with a
						
						wild, strange smile.</p><p id="v_9-p32">    "Don't disturb yourselves. I am not mad, I am only a murderer,"</p><p id="v_9-p33">Ivan began again. "You can't expect eloquence from a murderer," he
						
						added suddenly for some reason and laughed a queer laugh.</p><p id="v_9-p34">    The prosecutor bent over to the President in obvious dismay. The
						
						two other judges communicated in agitated whispers. Fetyukovitch
						
						pricked up his ears as he listened: the hall was hushed in
						
						expectation. The President seemed suddenly to recollect himself.</p><p id="v_9-p35">    "Witness, your words are incomprehensible and impossible here.</p><p id="v_9-p36">Calm yourself, if you can, and tell your story... if you really have
						
						something to tell. How can you confirm your statement... if indeed you
						
						are not delirious?"</p><p id="v_9-p37">    "That's just it. I have no proof. That cur Smerdyakov won't send
						
						you proofs from the other world... in an envelope. You think of
						
						nothing but envelopes- one is enough. I've no witnesses... except one,
						
						perhaps," he smiled thoughtfully.</p><p id="v_9-p38">    "Who is your witness?"</p><p id="v_9-p39">    "He has a tail, your excellency, and that would be irregular! Le
						
						diable n'existe point! Don't pay attention: he is a paltry, pitiful
						
						devil," he added suddenly. He ceased laughing and spoke as it were,
						
						confidentially. "He is here somewhere, no doubt- under that table with
						
						the material evidence on it, perhaps. Where should he sit if not
						
						there? You see, listen to me. I told him I don't want to keep quiet,
						
						and he talked about the geological cataclysm... idiocy! Come,
						
						release the monster... he's been singing a hymn. That's because his
						
						heart is light! It's like a drunken man in the street bawling how
						
						'Vanka went to Petersburg,' and I would give a quadrillion
						
						quadrillions for two seconds of joy. You don't know me! Oh, how stupid
						
						all this business is! Come, take me instead of him! I didn't come
						
						for nothing.... Why, why is everything so stupid?..."</p><p id="v_9-p40">    And he began slowly, and as it were reflectively, looking round
						
						him again. But the court was all excitement by now. Alyosha rushed
						
						towards him, but the court usher had already seized Ivan by the arm.</p><p id="v_9-p41">    "What are you about?" he cried, staring into the man's face, and
						
						suddenly seizing him by the shoulders, he flung him violently to the
						
						floor. But the police were on the spot and he was seized. He
						
						screamed furiously. And all the time he was being removed, he yelled
						
						and screamed something incoherent.</p><p id="v_9-p42">    The whole court was thrown into confusion. I don't remember
						
						everything as it happened. I was excited myself and could not
						
						follow. I only know that afterwards, when everything was quiet again
						
						and everyone understood what had happened, the court usher came in for
						
						a reprimand, though he very reasonably explained that the witness
						
						had been quite well, that the doctor had seen him an hour ago, when he
						
						had a slight attack of giddiness, but that, until he had come into the
						
						court, he had talked quite consecutively, so that nothing could have
						
						been foreseen- that he had, in fact, insisted on giving evidence.</p><p id="v_9-p43">But before everyone had completely regained their composure and
						
						recovered from this scene, it was followed by another. Katerina
						
						Ivanovna had an attack of hysterics. She sobbed, shrieking loudly, but
						
						refused to leave the court, struggled, and besought them not to remove
						
						her. Suddenly she cried to the President:</p><p id="v_9-p44">    "There is more evidence I must give at once ... at once! Here is a
						
						document, a letter... take it, read it quickly, quickly! It's a letter
						
						from that monster... that man there, there!" she pointed to Mitya. "It
						
						was he killed his father, you will see that directly. He wrote to me
						
						how he would kill his father! But the other one is ill, he is ill,
						
						he is delirious!" she kept crying out, beside herself.</p><p id="v_9-p45">    The court usher took the document she held out to the President,
						
						and she, dropping into her chair, hiding her face in her hands,
						
						began convulsively and noiselessly sobbing, shaking all over, and
						
						stifling every sound for fear she should be ejected from the court.</p><p id="v_9-p46">The document she had handed up was that letter Mitya had written at
						
						the Metropolis tavern, which Ivan had spoken of as a "mathematical
						
						proof." Alas! its mathematical conclusiveness was recognised, and
						
						had it not been for that letter, Mitya might have escaped his doom or,
						
						at least, that doom would have been less terrible. It was, I repeat,
						
						difficult to notice every detail. What followed is still confused to
						
						my mind. The President must, I suppose, have at once passed on the
						
						document to the judges, the jury, and the lawyers on both sides. I
						
						only remember how they began examining the witness. On being gently
						
						asked by the President whether she had recovered sufficiently,
						
						Katerina Ivanovna exclaimed impetuously:</p><p id="v_9-p47">    "I am ready, I am ready! I am quite equal to answering you," she
						
						added, evidently still afraid that she would somehow be prevented from
						
						giving evidence. She was asked to explain in detail what this letter
						
						was and under what circumstances she received it.</p><p id="v_9-p48">    "I received it the day before the crime was committed, but he
						
						wrote it the day before that, at the tavern- that is, two days
						
						before he committed the crime. Look, it is written on some sort of
						
						bill!" she cried breathlessly. "He hated me at that time, because he
						
						had behaved contemptibly and was running after that creature ... and
						
						because he owed me that three thousand.... Oh! he was humiliated by
						
						that three thousand on account of his own meanness! This is how it
						
						happened about that three thousand. I beg you, I beseech you, to
						
						hear me. Three weeks before he murdered his father, he came to me
						
						one morning. I knew he was in want of money, and what he wanted it
						
						for. Yes, yes- to win that creature and carry her off. I knew then
						
						that he had been false to me and meant to abandon me, and it was I, I,
						
						who gave him that money, who offered it to him on the pretext of his
						
						sending it to my sister in Moscow. And as I gave it him, I looked
						
						him in the face and said that he could send it when he liked, 'in a
						
						month's time would do.' How, how could he have failed to understand
						
						that I was practically telling him to his face, 'You want money to
						
						be false to me with your creature, so here's the money for you. I give
						
						it to you myself. Take it, if you have so little honour as to take
						
						it!' I wanted to prove what he was, and what happened? He took it,
						
						he took it, and squandered it with that creature in one night....</p><p id="v_9-p49">But he knew, he knew that I knew all about it. I assure you he
						
						understood, too, that I gave him that money to test him, to see
						
						whether he was so lost to all sense of honour as to take it from me. I
						
						looked into his eyes and he looked into mine, and he understood it all
						
						and he took it- he carried off my money!
						
							"That's true, Katya," Mitya roared suddenly, "I looked into your
						
						eyes and I knew that you were dishonouring me, and yet I took your
						
						money. Despise me as a scoundrel, despise me, all of you! I've
						
						deserved it!"</p><p id="v_9-p50">    "Prisoner," cried the President, "another word and I will order
						
						you to be removed."</p><p id="v_9-p51">    "That money was a torment to him," Katya went on with impulsive
						
						haste. "He wanted to repay it me. He wanted to, that's true; but he
						
						needed money for that creature, too. So he murdered his father, but he
						
						didn't repay me, and went off with her to that village where he was
						
						arrested. There, again, he squandered the money he had stolen after
						
						the murder of his father. And a day before the murder he wrote me this
						
						letter. He was drunk when he wrote it. I saw it at once, at the
						
						time. He wrote it from spite, and feeling certain, positively certain,
						
						that I should never show it to anyone, even if he did kill him, or
						
						else he wouldn't have written it. For he knew I shouldn't want to
						
						revenge myself and ruin him! But read it, read it attentively- more
						
						attentively, please- and you will see that he had described it all
						
						in his letter, all beforehand, how he would kill his father and
						
						where his money was kept. Look, please, don't overlook that, there's
						
						one phrase there, 'I shall kill him as soon as Ivan has gone away.' he
						
						thought it all out beforehand how he would kill him," Katerina
						
						Ivanovna pointed out to the court with venomous and malignant triumph.</p><p id="v_9-p52">Oh! it was clear she had studied every line of that letter and
						
						detected every meaning underlining it. "If he hadn't been drunk, he
						
						wouldn't have written to me; but, look, everything is written there
						
						beforehand, just as he committed the murder after. A complete
						
						programme of it!" she exclaimed frantically.</p><p id="v_9-p53">    She was reckless now of all consequences to herself, though, no
						
						doubt, she had foreseen them even a month ago, for even then, perhaps,
						
						shaking with anger, she had pondered whether to show it at the trial
						
						or not. Now she had taken the fatal plunge. I remember that the letter
						
						was read aloud by the clerk, directly afterwards, I believe. It made
						
						an overwhelming impression. They asked Mitya whether he admitted
						
						having written the letter.</p><p id="v_9-p54">    "It's mine, mine!" cried Mitya. "I shouldn't have written it if
						
						I hadn't been drunk!... We've hated each other for many things, Katya,
						
						but I swear, I swear I loved you even while I hated you, and you
						
						didn't love me!"</p><p id="v_9-p55">    He sank back on his seat, wringing his hands in despair. The
						
						prosecutor and counsel for the defence began cross-examining her,
						
						chiefly to ascertain what had induced her to conceal such a document
						
						and to give her evidence in quite a different tone and spirit just
						
						before.</p><p id="v_9-p56">    "Yes, yes. I was telling lies just now. I was lying against my
						
						honour and my conscience, but I wanted to save him, for he has hated
						
						and despised me so!" Katya cried madly. "Oh, he has despised me
						
						horribly, he has always despised me, and do you know, he has
						
						despised me from the very moment that I bowed down to him for that
						
						money. I saw that.... I felt it at once at the time, but for a long
						
						time I wouldn't believe it. How often I have read it in his eyes, 'You
						
						came of yourself, though.' Oh, he didn't understand, he had no idea
						
						why I ran to him, he can suspect nothing but baseness, he judged me by
						
						himself, he thought everyone was like himself!" Katya hissed
						
						furiously, in a perfect frenzy. "And he only wanted to marry me,
						
						because I'd inherited a fortune, because of that, because of that! I
						
						always suspected it was because of that! Oh, he is a brute! He was
						
						always convinced that I should be trembling with shame all my life
						
						before him, because I went to him then, and that he had a right to
						
						despise me forever for it, and so to be superior to me- that's why
						
						he wanted to marry me! That's so, that's all so! I tried to conquer
						
						him by my love- a love that knew no bounds. I even tried to forgive
						
						his faithlessness; but he understood nothing, nothing! How could he
						
						understand indeed? He is a monster! I only received that letter the
						
						next evening: it was brought me from the tavern- and only that
						
						morning, only that morning I wanted to forgive him everything,
						
						everything- even his treachery!"</p><p id="v_9-p57">    The President and the prosecutor, of course, tried to calm her.</p><p id="v_9-p58">I can't help thinking that they felt ashamed of taking advantage of
						
						her hysteria and of listening to such avowals. I remember hearing them
						
						say to her, "We understand how hard it is for you; be sure we are able
						
						to feel for you," and so on, and so on. And yet they dragged the
						
						evidence out of the raving, hysterical woman. She described at last
						
						with extraordinary clearness, which is so often seen, though only
						
						for a moment, in such overwrought states, how Ivan had been nearly
						
						driven out of his mind during the last two months trying to save
						
						"the monster and murderer," his brother.</p><p id="v_9-p59">    "He tortured himself," she exclaimed, "he was always trying to
						
						minimise his brother's guilt and confessing to me that he, too, had
						
						never loved his father, and perhaps desired his death himself. Oh,
						
						he has a tender, over-tender conscience! He tormented himself with his
						
						conscience! He told me everything, everything! He came every day and
						
						talked to me as his only friend. I have the honour to be his only
						
						friend!" she cried suddenly with a sort of defiance, and her eyes
						
						flashed. "He had been twice to see Smerdyakov. One day he came to me
						
						and said, 'If it was not my brother, but Smerdyakov committed the
						
						murder' (for the legend was circulating everywhere that Smerdyakov had
						
						done it), 'perhaps I too am guilty, for Smerdyakov knew I didn't
						
						like my father and perhaps believed that I desired my father's death.'
						
						Then I brought out that letter and showed it him. He was entirely
						
						convinced that his brother had done it, and he was overwhelmed by
						
						it. He couldn't endure the thought that his own brother was a
						
						parricide! Only a week ago I saw that it was making him ill. During
						
						the last few days he has talked incoherently in my presence. I saw his
						
						mind was giving way. He walked about, raving; he was seen muttering in
						
						the streets. The doctor from Moscow, at my request, examined him the
						
						day before yesterday and told me that he was on the eve of brain
						
						fever- and all on his account, on account of this monster! And last
						
						night he learnt that Smerdyakov was dead! It was such a shock that
						
						it drove him out of his mind... and all through this monster, all
						
						for the sake of saving the monster!"</p><p id="v_9-p60">    Oh, of course, such an outpouring, such an avowal is only possible
						
						once in a lifetime- at the hour of death, for instance, on the way
						
						to the scaffold! But it was in Katya's character, and it was such a
						
						moment in her life. It was the same impetuous Katya who had thrown
						
						herself on the mercy of a young profligate to save her father; the
						
						same Katya who had just before, in her pride and chastity,
						
						sacrificed herself and her maidenly modesty before all these people,
						
						telling of Mitya's generous conduct, in the hope of softening his fate
						
						a little. And now, again, she sacrificed herself; but this time it was
						
						for another, and perhaps only now- perhaps only at this moment- she
						
						felt and knew how dear that other was to her! She had sacrificed
						
						herself in terror for him; conceiving all of a sudden that he had
						
						ruined himself by his confession that it was he who had committed
						
						the murder, not his brother, she had sacrificed herself to save him,
						
						to save his good name, his reputation!
						
							</p><p id="v_9-p61">And yet one terrible doubt occurred to one- was she lying in her
						
						description of her former relations with Mitya?- that was the
						
						question. No, she had not intentionally slandered him when she cried
						
						that Mitya despised her for her bowing down to him! She believed it
						
						herself. She had been firmly convinced, perhaps ever since that bow,
						
						that the simplehearted Mitya, who even then adored her, was laughing
						
						at her and despising her. She had loved him with an hysterical,
						
						"lacerated" love only from pride, from wounded pride, and that love
						
						was not like love, but more like revenge. Oh! perhaps that lacerated
						
						love would have grown into real love, perhaps Katya longed for nothing
						
						more than that, but Mitya's faithlessness had wounded her to the
						
						bottom of her heart, and her heart could not forgive him. The moment
						
						of revenge had come upon her suddenly, and all that had been
						
						accumulating so long and so painfully in the offended woman's breast
						
						burst out all at once and unexpectedly. She betrayed Mitya, but she
						
						betrayed herself, too. And no sooner had she given full expression
						
						to her feelings than the tension of course was over and she was
						
						overwhelmed with shame. Hysterics began again: she fell on the
						
						floor, sobbing and screaming. She was carried out. At that moment
						
						Grushenka, with a wail, rushed towards Mitya before they had time to
						
						prevent her.</p><p id="v_9-p62">    "Mitya," she wailed, "your serpent has destroyed you! There, she
						
						has shown you what she is!" she shouted to the judges, shaking with
						
						anger. At a signal from the President they seized her and tried to
						
						remove her from the court. She wouldn't allow it. She fought and
						
						struggled to get back to Mitya. Mitya uttered a cry and struggled to
						
						get to her. He was overpowered.</p><p id="v_9-p63">    Yes, I think the ladies who came to see the spectacle must have
						
						been satisfied- the show had been a varied one. Then I remember the
						
						Moscow doctor appeared on the scene. I believe the President had
						
						previously sent the court usher to arrange for medical aid for Ivan.</p><p id="v_9-p64">The doctor announced to the court that the sick man was suffering from
						
						a dangerous attack of brain fever, and that he must be at once
						
						removed. In answer to questions from the prosecutor and the counsel
						
						for the defence he said that the patient had come to him of his own
						
						accord the day before yesterday and that he had warned him that he had
						
						such an attack coming on, but he had not consented to be looked after.</p><p id="v_9-p65">"He was certainly not in a normal state of mind: he told me himself
						
						that he saw visions when he was awake, that he met several persons
						
						in the street, who were dead, and that Satan visited him every
						
						evening," said the doctor, in conclusion. Having given his evidence,
						
						the celebrated doctor withdrew. The letter produced by Katerina
						
						Ivanovna was added to the material proofs. After some deliberation,
						
						the judges decided to proceed with the trial and to enter both the
						
						unexpected pieces of evidence (given by Ivan and Katerina Ivanovna) on
						
						the protocol.</p><p id="v_9-p66">    But I will not detail the evidence of the other witnesses, who
						
						only repeated and confirmed what had been said before, though all with
						
						their characteristic peculiarities. I repeat, all was brought together
						
						in the prosecutor's speech, which I shall quote immediately.</p><p id="v_9-p67">Everyone was excited, everyone was electrified by the late
						
						catastrophe, and all were awaiting the speeches for the prosecution
						
						and the defence with intense impatience. Fetyukovitch was obviously
						
						shaken by Katerina Ivanovna's evidence. But the prosecutor was
						
						triumphant. When all the evidence had been taken, the court was
						
						adjourned for almost an hour. I believe it was just eight o'clock when
						
						the President returned to his seat and our prosecutor, Ippolit
						
						Kirillovitch, began his speech.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 6 - The Prosecutor's Speech. Sketches of Character" prev="v_9" next="vii_8" id="vi_8">
							<p id="vi_8-p1">IPPOLIT KIRILLOVITCH began his speech, trembling with nervousness,
						
						with cold sweat on his forehead, feeling hot and cold all over by
						
						turns. He described this himself afterwards. He regarded this speech
						
						as his chef-d'oeuvre, the chef-d'oeuvre of his whole life, as his
						
						swan-song. He died, it is true, nine months later of rapid
						
						consumption, so that he had the right, as it turned out, to compare
						
						himself to a swan singing his last song. He had put his whole heart
						
						and all the brain he had into that speech. And poor Ippolit
						
						Kirillovitch unexpectedly revealed that at least some feeling for
						
						the public welfare and "the eternal question" lay concealed in him.</p><p id="vi_8-p2">Where his speech really excelled was in its sincerity. He genuinely
						
						believed in the prisoner's guilt; he was accusing him not as an
						
						official duty only, and in calling for vengeance he quivered with a
						
						genuine passion "for the security of society." Even the ladies in thee
						
						audience, though they remained hostile to Ippolit Kirillovitch,
						
						admitted that he made an extraordinary impression on them. He began in
						
						a breaking voice, but it soon gained strength and filled the court
						
						to the end of his speech. But as soon as he had finished, he almost
						
						fainted.</p><p id="vi_8-p3">    "Gentlemen of the jury," began the prosecutor, "this case has made
						
						a stir throughout Russia. But what is there to wonder at, what is
						
						there so peculiarly horrifying in it for us? We are so accustomed to
						
						such crimes! That's what's so horrible, that such dark deeds have
						
						ceased to horrify us. What ought to horrify us is that we are so
						
						accustomed to it, and not this or that isolated crime. What are the
						
						causes of our indifference, our lukewarm attitude to such deeds, to
						
						such signs of the times, ominous of an unenviable future? Is it our
						
						cynicism, is it the premature exhaustion of intellect and
						
						imagination in a society that is sinking into decay, in spite of its
						
						youth? Is it that our moral principles are shattered to their
						
						foundations, or is it, perhaps, a complete lack of such principles
						
						among us? I cannot answer such questions; nevertheless they are
						
						disturbing, and every citizen not only must, but ought to be
						
						harassed by them. Our newborn and still timid press has done good
						
						service to the public already, for without it we should never have
						
						heard of the horrors of unbridled violence and moral degradation which
						
						are continually made known by the press, not merely to those who
						
						attend the new jury courts established in the present reign, but to
						
						everyone. And what do we read almost daily? Of things beside which the
						
						present case grows pale, and seems almost commonplace. But what is
						
						most important is that the majority of our national crimes of violence
						
						bear witness to a widespread evil, now so general among us that it
						
						is difficult to contend against it.</p><p id="vi_8-p4">    "One day we see a brilliant young officer of high society, at
						
						the very outset of his career, in a cowardly underhand way, without
						
						a pang of conscience, murdering an official who had once been his
						
						benefactor, and the servant girl, to steal his own I O U and what
						
						ready money he could find on him; 'it will come in handy for my
						
						pleasures in the fashionable world and for my career in the future.'
						
						After murdering them, he puts pillows under the head of each of his
						
						victims; he goes away. Next, a young hero 'decorated for bravery'
						
						kills the mother of his chief and benefactor, like a highwayman, and
						
						to urge his companions to join him he asserts that 'she loves him like
						
						a son, and so will follow all his directions and take no precautions.'
						
						Granted that he is a monster, yet I dare not say in these days that he
						
						is unique. Another man will not commit the murder, but will feel and
						
						think like him, and is as dishonourable in soul. In silence, alone
						
						with his conscience, he asks himself perhaps, 'What is honour, and
						
						isn't the condemnation of bloodshed a prejudice?'
						
							</p><p id="vi_8-p5">"Perhaps people will cry out against me that I am morbid,
						
						hysterical, that it is a monstrous slander, that I am exaggerating.</p><p id="vi_8-p6">Let them say so- and heavens! I should be the first to rejoice if it
						
						were so! Oh, don't believe me, think of me as morbid, but remember
						
						my words; if only a tenth, if only a twentieth part of what I say is
						
						true- even so it's awful! Look how our young people commit suicide,
						
						without asking themselves Hamlet's question what there is beyond,
						
						without a sign of such a question, as though all that relates to the
						
						soul and to what awaits us beyond the grave had long been erased in
						
						their minds and buried under the sands. Look at our vice, at our
						
						profligates. Fyodor Pavlovitch, the luckless victim in the present
						
						case, was almost an innocent babe compared with many of them. And
						
						yet we all knew him, 'he lived among us!'...</p><p id="vi_8-p7">    "Yes, one day perhaps the leading intellects of Russia and of
						
						Europe will study the psychology of Russian crime, for the subject
						
						is worth it. But this study will come later, at leisure, when all
						
						the tragic topsy-turvydom of to-day is farther behind us, so that it's
						
						possible to examine it with more insight and more impartiality than
						
						I can do. Now we are either horrified or pretend to be horrified,
						
						though we really gloat over the spectacle, and love strong and
						
						eccentric sensations which tickle our cynical, pampered idleness.</p><p id="vi_8-p8">Or, like little children, we brush the dreadful ghosts away and hide
						
						our heads in the pillow so as to return to our sports and merriment as
						
						soon as they have vanished. But we must one day begin life in sober
						
						earnest, we must look at ourselves as a society; it's time we tried to
						
						grasp something of our social position, or at least to make a
						
						beginning in that direction.</p><p id="vi_8-p9">    "A great writer* of the last epoch, comparing Russia to a swift
						
						troika galloping to an unknown goal, exclaims, 'Oh, troika, birdlike
						
						troika, who invented thee!' and adds, in proud ecstasy, that all the
						
						peoples of the world stand aside respectfully to make way for the
						
						recklessly galloping troika to pass. That may be, they may stand
						
						aside, respectfully or no, but in my poor opinion the great writer
						
						ended his book in this way either in an excess of childish and naive
						
						optimism, or simply in fear of the censorship of the day. For if the
						
						troika were drawn by his heroes, Sobakevitch, Nozdryov, Tchitchikov,
						
						it could reach no rational goal, whoever might be driving it. And
						
						those were the heroes of an older generation, ours are worse specimens
						
						still...."</p><p id="vi_8-p10" /><p id="vi_8-p11">
						
							* Gogol.</p><p id="vi_8-p12" /><p id="vi_8-p13">
						
							At this point Ippolit Kirillovitch's speech was interrupted by
						
						applause. The liberal significance of this simile was appreciated. The
						
						applause was, it's true, of brief duration, so that the President
						
						did not think it necessary to caution the public, and only looked
						
						severely in the direction of the offenders. But Ippolit Kirillovitch
						
						was encouraged; he had never been applauded before! He had been all
						
						his life unable to get a hearing, and now he suddenly had an
						
						opportunity of securing the ear of all Russia.</p><p id="vi_8-p14">    "What, after all, is this Karamazov family, which has gained
						
						such an unenviable notoriety throughout Russia?" he continued.</p><p id="vi_8-p15">"Perhaps I am exaggerating, but it seems to me that certain
						
						fundamental features of the educated class of to-day are reflected
						
						in this family picture- only, of course, in miniature, 'like the sun
						
						in a drop of water.' Think of that unhappy, vicious, unbridled old
						
						man, who has met with such a melancholy end, the head of a family!</p><p id="vi_8-p16">Beginning life of noble birth, but in a poor dependent position,
						
						through an unexpected marriage he came into a small fortune. A petty
						
						knave, a toady and buffoon, of fairly good, though undeveloped,
						
						intelligence, he was, above all, a moneylender, who grew bolder with
						
						growing prosperity. His abject and servile characteristics
						
						disappeared, his, malicious and sarcastic cynicism was all that
						
						remained. On the spiritual side he was undeveloped, while his vitality
						
						was excessive. He saw nothing in life but sensual pleasure, and he
						
						brought his children up to be the same. He had no feelings for his
						
						duties as a father. He ridiculed those duties. He left his little
						
						children to the servants, and was glad to be rid of them, forgot about
						
						them completely. The old man's maxim was Apres moi le deluge.* He
						
						was an example of everything that is opposed to civic duty, of the
						
						most complete and malignant individualism. 'The world may burn for
						
						aught I care, so long as I am all right,' and he was all right; he was
						
						content, he was eager to go on living in the same way for another
						
						twenty or thirty years. He swindled his own son and spent his money,
						
						his maternal inheritance, on trying to get his mistress from him.</p><p id="vi_8-p17">No, I don't intend to leave the prisoner's defence altogether to my
						
						talented colleague from Petersburg. I will speak the truth myself, I
						
						can well understand what resentment he had heaped up in his son's
						
						heart against him.</p><p id="vi_8-p18" /><p id="vi_8-p19">
						
							* After me, the deluge.</p><p id="vi_8-p20" /><p id="vi_8-p21">
						
							"But enough, enough of that unhappy old man; he has paid the
						
						penalty. Let us remember, however, that he was a father, and one of
						
						the typical fathers of to-day. Am I unjust, indeed, in saying that
						
						he is typical of many modern fathers? Alas! many of them only differ
						
						in not openly professing such cynicism, for they are better
						
						educated, more cultured, but their philosophy is essentially the
						
						same as his. Perhaps I am a pessimist, but you have agreed to
						
						forgive me. Let us agree beforehand, you need not believe me, but
						
						let me speak. Let me say what I have to say, and remember something of
						
						my words.</p><p id="vi_8-p22">    "Now for the children of this father, this head of a family. One
						
						of them is the prisoner before us, all the rest of my speech will deal
						
						with him. Of the other two I will speak only cursorily.</p><p id="vi_8-p23">    "The elder is one of those modern young men of brilliant education
						
						and vigorous intellect, who has lost all faith in everything. He has
						
						denied and rejected much already, like his father. We have all heard
						
						him, he was a welcome guest in local society. He never concealed his
						
						opinions, quite the contrary in fact, which justifies me in speaking
						
						rather openly of him now, of course, not as an individual, but as a
						
						member of the Karamazov family. Another personage closely connected
						
						with the case died here by his own hand last night. I mean an
						
						afflicted idiot, formerly the servant, and possibly the illegitimate
						
						son, of Fyodor Pavlovitch, Smerdyakov. At the preliminary inquiry,
						
						he told me with hysterical tears how the young Ivan Karamazov had
						
						horrified him by his spiritual audacity. 'Everything in the world is
						
						lawful according to him, and nothing must be forbidden in the
						
						future- that is what he always taught me.' I believe that idiot was
						
						driven out of his mind by this theory, though, of course, the
						
						epileptic attacks from which he suffered, and this terrible
						
						catastrophe, have helped to unhinge his faculties. But he dropped
						
						one very interesting observation, which would have done credit to a
						
						more intelligent observer, and that is, indeed, why I've mentioned it:</p><p id="vi_8-p24">'If there is one of the sons that is like Fyodor Pavlovitch in
						
						character, it is Ivan Fyodorovitch.'
						
							</p><p id="vi_8-p25">"With that remark I conclude my sketch of his character, feeling
						
						it indelicate to continue further. Oh, I don't want to draw any
						
						further conclusions and croak like a raven over the young man's
						
						future. We've seen to-day in this court that there are still good
						
						impulses in his young heart, that family feeling has not been
						
						destroyed in him by lack of faith and cynicism, which have come to him
						
						rather by inheritance than by the exercise of independent thought.</p><p id="vi_8-p26">    "Then the third son. Oh, he is a devout and modest youth, who does
						
						not share his elder brother's gloomy and destructive theory of life.</p><p id="vi_8-p27">He has sought to cling to the 'ideas of the people,' or to what goes
						
						by that name in some circles of our intellectual classes. He clung
						
						to the monastery, and was within an ace of becoming a monk. He seems
						
						to me to have betrayed unconsciously, and so early, that timid despair
						
						which leads so many in our unhappy society, who dread cynicism and its
						
						corrupting influences, and mistakenly attribute all the mischief to
						
						European enlightenment, to return to their 'native soil,' as they say,
						
						to the bosom, so to speak, of their mother earth, like frightened
						
						children, yearning to fall asleep on the withered bosom of their
						
						decrepit mother, and to sleep there for ever, only to escape the
						
						horrors that terrify them.</p><p id="vi_8-p28">    "For my part I wish the excellent and gifted young man every
						
						success; I trust that youthful idealism and impulse towards the
						
						ideas of the people may never degenerate, as often happens, on the
						
						moral side into gloomy mysticism, and on the political into blind
						
						chauvinism- two elements which are even a greater menace to Russia
						
						than the premature decay, due to misunderstanding and gratuitous
						
						adoption of European ideas, from which his elder brother is
						
						suffering."</p><p id="vi_8-p29">    Two or three people clapped their hands at the mention of
						
						chauvinism and mysticism. Ippolit Kirillovitch had been, indeed,
						
						carried away by his own eloquence. All this had little to do with
						
						the case in hand, to say nothing of the fact of its being somewhat
						
						vague, but the sickly and consumptive man was overcome by the desire
						
						to express himself once in his life. People said afterwards that he
						
						was actuated by unworthy motives in his criticism of Ivan, because the
						
						latter had on one or two occasions got the better of him in
						
						argument, and Ippolit Kirillovitch, remembering it, tried now to
						
						take his revenge. But I don't know whether it was true. All this was
						
						only introductory, however, and the speech passed to more direct
						
						consideration of the case.</p><p id="vi_8-p30">    "But to return to the eldest son," Ippolit Kirillovitch went on.</p><p id="vi_8-p31">"He is the prisoner before us. We have his life and his actions,
						
						too, before us; the fatal day has come and all has been brought to the
						
						surface. While his brothers seem to stand for 'Europeanism' and 'the
						
						principles of the people,' he seems to represent Russia as she is. Oh,
						
						not all Russia, not all! God preserve us, if it were! Yet, here we
						
						have her, our mother Russia, the very scent and sound of her. Oh, he
						
						is spontaneous, he is a marvellous mingling of good and evil, he is
						
						a lover of culture and Schiller, yet he brawls in taverns and plucks
						
						out the beards of his boon companions. Oh, he, too, can be good and
						
						noble, but only when all goes well with him. What is more, he can be
						
						carried off his feet, positively carried off his feet by noble ideals,
						
						but only if they come of themselves, if they fall from heaven for him,
						
						if they need not be paid for. He dislikes paying for anything, but
						
						is very fond of receiving, and that's so with him in everything. Oh,
						
						give him every possible good in life (he couldn't be content with
						
						less), and put no obstacle in his way, and he will show that he,
						
						too, can be noble. He is not greedy, no, but he must have money, a
						
						great deal of money, and you will see how generously, with what
						
						scorn of filthy lucre, he will fling it all away in the reckless
						
						dissipation of one night. But if he has not money, he will show what
						
						he is ready to do to get it when he is in great need of it. But all
						
						this later, let us take events in their chronological order.</p><p id="vi_8-p32">    "First, we have before us a poor abandoned child, running about
						
						the back-yard 'without boots on his feet,' as our worthy and
						
						esteemed fellow citizen, of foreign origin, alas! expressed it just
						
						now. I repeat it again, I yield to no one the defence of the criminal.</p><p id="vi_8-p33">I am here to accuse him, but to defend him also. Yes, I, too, am
						
						human; I, too, can weigh the influence of home and childhood on the
						
						character. But the boy grows up and becomes an officer; for a duel and
						
						other reckless conduct he is exiled to one of the remote frontier
						
						towns of Russia. There he led a wild life as an officer. And, of
						
						course, he needed money, money before all things, and so after
						
						prolonged disputes he came to a settlement with his father, and the
						
						last six thousand was sent him. A letter is in existence in which he
						
						practically gives up his claim to the rest and settles his conflict
						
						with his father over the inheritance on the payment of this six
						
						thousand.</p><p id="vi_8-p34">    "Then came his meeting with a young girl of lofty character and
						
						brilliant education. Oh, I do not venture to repeat the details; you
						
						have only just heard them. Honour, self-sacrifice were shown there,
						
						and I will be silent. The figure of the young officer, frivolous and
						
						profligate, doing homage to true nobility and a lofty ideal, was shown
						
						in a very sympathetic light before us. But the other side of the medal
						
						was unexpectedly turned to us immediately after in this very court.</p><p id="vi_8-p35">Again I will not venture to conjecture why it happened so, but there
						
						were causes. The same lady, bathed in tears of long-concealed
						
						indignation, alleged that he, he of all men, had despised her for
						
						her action, which, though incautious, reckless perhaps, was still
						
						dictated by lofty and generous motives. He, he, the girl's
						
						betrothed, looked at her with that smile of mockery, which was more
						
						insufferable from him than from anyone. And knowing that he had
						
						already deceived her (he had deceived her, believing that she was
						
						bound to endure everything from him, even treachery), she
						
						intentionally offered him three thousand roubles, and clearly, too
						
						clearly, let him understand that she was offering him money to deceive
						
						her. 'Well, will you take it or not, are you so lost to shame?' was
						
						the dumb question in her scrutinising eyes. He looked at her, saw
						
						clearly what was in her mind (he's admitted here before you that he
						
						understood it all), appropriated that three thousand
						
						unconditionally, and squandered it in two days with the new object
						
						of his affections.</p><p id="vi_8-p36">    "What are we to believe then? The first legend of the young
						
						officer sacrificing his last farthing in a noble impulse of generosity
						
						and doing reverence to virtue, or this other revolting picture? As a
						
						rule, between two extremes one has to find the mean, but in the
						
						present case this is not true. The probability is that in the first
						
						case he was genuinely noble, and in the second as genuinely base.</p><p id="vi_8-p37">And why? Because he was of the broad Karamazov character- that's
						
						just what I am leading up to- capable of combining the most
						
						incongruous contradictions, and capable of the greatest heights and of
						
						the greatest depths. Remember the brilliant remark made by a young
						
						observer who has seen the Karamazov family at close quarters- Mr.</p><p id="vi_8-p38">Rakitin: 'The sense of their own degradation is as essential to
						
						those reckless, unbridled natures as the sense of their lofty
						
						generosity.' And that's true, they need continually this unnatural
						
						mixture. Two extremes at the same moment, or they are miserable and
						
						dissatisfied and their existence is incomplete. They are wide, wide as
						
						mother Russia; they include everything and put up with everything.</p><p id="vi_8-p39">    "By the way, gentlemen of the jury, we've just touched upon that
						
						three thousand roubles, and I will venture to anticipate things a
						
						little. Can you conceive that a man like that, on receiving that sum
						
						and in such a way, at the price of such shame, such disgrace, such
						
						utter degradation, could have been capable that very day of setting
						
						apart half that sum, that very day, and sewing it up in a little
						
						bag, and would have had the firmness of character to carry it about
						
						with him for a whole month afterwards, in spite of every temptation
						
						and his extreme need of it! Neither in drunken debauchery in
						
						taverns, nor when he was flying into the country, trying to get from
						
						God knows whom, the money so essential to him to remove the object
						
						of his affections from being tempted by his father, did he bring
						
						himself to touch that little bag! Why, if only to avoid abandoning his
						
						mistress to the rival of whom he was so jealous, he would have been
						
						certain to have opened that bag and to have stayed at home to keep
						
						watch over her, and to await the moment when she would say to him at
						
						last 'I am yours,' and to fly with her far from their fatal
						
						surroundings.</p><p id="vi_8-p40">    "But no, he did not touch his talisman, and what is the reason
						
						he gives for it? The chief reason, as I have just said, was that
						
						when she would say' I am yours, take me where you will,' he might have
						
						the wherewithal to take her. But that first reason, in the
						
						prisoner's own words, was of little weight beside the second. While
						
						I have that money on me, he said, I am a scoundrel, not a thief, for I
						
						can always go to my insulted betrothed, and, laying down half the
						
						sum I have fraudulently appropriated, I can always say to her, 'You
						
						see, I've squandered half your money, and shown I am a weak and
						
						immoral man, and, if you like, a scoundrel' (I use the prisoner's
						
						own expressions), 'but though I am a scoundrel, I am not a thief,
						
						for if I had been a thief, I shouldn't have brought you back this half
						
						of the money, but should have taken it as I did the other half!' A
						
						marvellous explanation! This frantic, but weak man, who could not
						
						resist the temptation of accepting the three thousand roubles at the
						
						price of such disgrace, this very man suddenly develops the most
						
						stoical firmness, and carries about a thousand roubles without
						
						daring to touch it. Does that fit in at all with the character we have
						
						analysed? No, and I venture to tell you how the real Dmitri
						
						Karamazov would have behaved in such circumstances, if he really had
						
						brought himself to put away the money.</p><p id="vi_8-p41">    "At the first temptation- for instance, to entertain the woman
						
						with whom he had already squandered half the money- he would have
						
						unpicked his little bag and have taken out some hundred roubles, for
						
						why should he have taken back precisely half the money, that is,
						
						fifteen hundred roubles? Why not fourteen hundred? He could just as
						
						well have said then that he was not a thief, because he brought back
						
						fourteen hundred roubles. Then another time he would have unpicked
						
						it again and taken out another hundred, and then a third, and then a
						
						fourth, and before the end of the month he would have taken the last
						
						note but one, feeling that if he took back only a hundred it would
						
						answer the purpose, for a thief would have stolen it all. And then
						
						he would have looked at this last note, and have said to himself,
						
						'It's really not worth while to give back one hundred; let's spend
						
						that, too!' That's how the real Dmitri Karamazov, as we know him,
						
						would have behaved. One cannot imagine anything more incongruous
						
						with the actual fact than this legend of the little bag. Nothing could
						
						be more inconceivable. But we shall return to that later."</p><p id="vi_8-p42">    After touching upon what had come out in the proceedings
						
						concerning the financial relations of father and son, and arguing
						
						again and again that it was utterly impossible, from the facts
						
						known, to determine which was in the wrong, Ippolit Kirillovitch
						
						passed to the evidence of the medical experts in reference to
						
						Mitya's fixed idea about the three thousand owing him.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 7 - An Historical Survey" prev="vi_8" next="viii_5" id="vii_8">
					
					

							<p id="vii_8-p1">"THE medical experts have striven to convince us that the prisoner
						
						is out of his mind and, in fact, a maniac. I maintain that he is in
						
						his right mind, and that if he had not been, he would have behaved
						
						more cleverly. As for his being a maniac, that I would agree with, but
						
						only in one point, that is, his fixed idea about the three thousand.</p><p id="vii_8-p2">Yet I think one might find a much simpler cause than his tendency to
						
						insanity. For my part I agree thoroughly with the young doctor who
						
						maintained that the prisoner's mental faculties have always been
						
						normal, and that he has only been irritable and exasperated. The
						
						object of the prisoner's continual and violent anger was not the sum
						
						itself; there was a special motive at the bottom of it. That motive is
						
						jealousy!"</p><p id="vii_8-p3">    Here Ippolit Kirillovitch described at length the prisoner's fatal
						
						passion for Grushenka. He began from the moment when the prisoner went
						
						to the "young person's" lodgings "to beat her"- "I use his own
						
						expression," the prosecutor explained- "but instead of beating her, he
						
						remained there, at her feet. That was the beginning of the passion. At
						
						the same time the prisoner's father was captivated by the same young
						
						person- a strange and fatal coincidence, for they both lost their
						
						hearts to her simultaneously, though both had known her before. And
						
						she inspired in both of them the most violent, characteristically
						
						Karamazov passion. We have her own confession: 'I was laughing at both
						
						of them.' Yes, the sudden desire to make a jest of them came over her,
						
						and she conquered both of them at once. The old man, who worshipped
						
						money, at once set aside three thousand roubles as a reward for one
						
						visit from her, but soon after that, he would have been happy to lay
						
						his property and his name at her feet, if only she would become his
						
						lawful wife. We have good evidence of this. As for the prisoner, the
						
						tragedy of his fate is evident; it is before us. But such was the
						
						young person's 'game.' The enchantress gave the unhappy young man no
						
						hope until the last moment, when he knelt before her, stretching out
						
						hands that were already stained with the blood of his father and
						
						rival. It was in that position that he was arrested. 'Send me to
						
						Siberia with him, I have brought him to this, I am most to blame,' the
						
						woman herself cried, in genuine remorse at the moment of his arrest.</p><p id="vii_8-p4">    "The talented young man, to whom I have referred already, Mr.</p><p id="vii_8-p5">Rakitin, characterised this heroine in brief and impressive terms:</p><p id="vii_8-p6">'She was disillusioned early in life, deceived and ruined by a
						
						betrothed, who seduced and abandoned her. She was left in poverty,
						
						cursed by her respectable family and taken under the protection of a
						
						wealthy old man, whom she still, however, considers as her benefactor.</p><p id="vii_8-p7">There was perhaps much that was good in her young heart, but it was
						
						embittered too early. She became prudent and saved money. She grew
						
						sarcastic and resentful against society.' After this sketch of her
						
						character it may well be understood that she might laugh at both of
						
						them simply from mischief, from malice.</p><p id="vii_8-p8">    "After a month of hopeless love and moral degradation, during
						
						which he betrayed his betrothed and appropriated money entrusted to
						
						his honour, the prisoner was driven almost to frenzy, almost to
						
						madness by continual jealousy- and of whom? His father! And the
						
						worst of it was that the crazy old man was alluring and enticing the
						
						object of his affection by means of that very three thousand
						
						roubles, which the son looked upon as his own property, part of his
						
						inheritance from his mother, of which his father was cheating him.</p><p id="vii_8-p9">Yes, I admit it was hard to bear! It might well drive a man to
						
						madness. It was not the money, but the fact that this money was used
						
						with such revolting cynicism to ruin his happiness!"</p><p id="vii_8-p10">    Then the prosecutor went on to describe how the idea of
						
						murdering his father had entered the prisoner's head, and
						
						illustrated his theory with facts.</p><p id="vii_8-p11">    "At first he only talked about it in taverns- he was talking about
						
						it all that month. Ah, he likes being always surrounded with
						
						company, and he likes to tell his companions everything, even his most
						
						diabolical and dangerous ideas; he likes to share every thought with
						
						others, and expects, for some reason, that those he confides in will
						
						meet him with perfect sympathy, enter into all his troubles and
						
						anxieties, take his part and not oppose him in anything. If not, he
						
						flies into a rage and smashes up everything in the tavern. (Then
						
						followed the anecdote about Captain Snegiryov.) Those who heard the
						
						prisoner began to think at last that he might mean more than
						
						threats, and that such a frenzy might turn threats into actions."</p><p id="vii_8-p12">    Here the prosecutor described the meeting of the family at the
						
						monastery, the conversations with Alyosha, and the horrible scene of
						
						violence when the prisoner had rushed into his father's house just
						
						after dinner.</p><p id="vii_8-p13">    "I cannot positively assert," the prosecutor continued, "that
						
						the prisoner fully intended to murder his father before that incident.</p><p id="vii_8-p14">Yet the idea had several times presented itself to him, and he had
						
						deliberated on it- for that we have facts, witnesses, and his own
						
						words. I confess, gentlemen of the jury," he added, "that till
						
						to-day I have been uncertain whether to attribute to the prisoner
						
						conscious premeditation. I was firmly convinced that he had pictured
						
						the fatal moment beforehand, but had only pictured it, contemplating
						
						it as a possibility. He had not definitely considered when and how
						
						he might commit the crime.</p><p id="vii_8-p15">    "But I was only uncertain till to-day, till that fatal document
						
						was presented to the court just now. You yourselves heard that young
						
						lady's exclamation, 'It is the plan, the programme of the murder!'
						
						That is how she defined that miserable, drunken letter of the
						
						unhappy prisoner. And, in fact, from that letter we see that the whole
						
						fact of the murder was premeditated. It was written two days before,
						
						and so we know now for a fact that, forty-eight hours before the
						
						perpetration of his terrible design, the prisoner swore that, if he
						
						could not get money next day, he would murder his father in order to
						
						take the envelope with the notes from under his pillow, as soon as
						
						Ivan had left. 'As soon as Ivan had gone away'- you hear that; so he
						
						had thought everything out, weighing every circumstance, and he
						
						carried it all out just as he had written it. The proof of
						
						premeditation is conclusive; the crime must have been committed for
						
						the sake of the money, that is stated clearly, that is written and
						
						signed. The prisoner does not deny his signature.</p><p id="vii_8-p16">    "I shall be told he was drunk when he wrote it. But that does
						
						not diminish the value of the letter, quite the contrary; he wrote
						
						when drunk what he had planned when sober. Had he not planned it
						
						when sober, he would not have written it when drunk. I shall be asked:</p><p id="vii_8-p17">Then why did he talk about  it in taverns? A man who premeditates such
						
						a crime is silent and keeps it to himself. Yes, but he talked about it
						
						before he had formed a plan, when he had only the desire, only the
						
						impulse to it. Afterwards he talked less about it. On the evening he
						
						wrote that letter at the Metropolis tavern, contrary to his custom
						
						he was silent, though he had been drinking. He did not play billiards,
						
						he sat in a corner, talked to no one. He did indeed turn a shopman out
						
						of his seat, but that was done almost unconsciously, because he
						
						could never enter a tavern without making a disturbance. It is true
						
						that after he had taken the final decision, he must have felt
						
						apprehensive that he had talked too much about his design
						
						beforehand, and that this might lead to his arrest and prosecution
						
						afterwards. But there was nothing for it; he could not take his
						
						words back, but his luck had served him before, it would serve him
						
						again. He believed in his star, you know! I must confess, too, that he
						
						did a great deal to avoid the fatal catastrophe. 'To-morrow I shall
						
						try and borrow the money from everyone,' as he writes in his
						
						peculiar language,' and if they won't give it to me, there will be
						
						bloodshed.'"</p><p id="vii_8-p18">    Here Ippolit Kirillovitch passed to a detailed description of
						
						all Mitya's efforts to borrow the money. He described his visit to
						
						Samsonov, his journey to Lyagavy. "Harassed, jeered at, hungry,
						
						after selling his watch to pay for the journey (though he tells us
						
						he had fifteen hundred roubles on him- a likely story), tortured by
						
						jealousy at having left the object of his affections in the town,
						
						suspecting that she would go to Fyodor Pavlovitch in his absense, he
						
						returned at last to the town, to find, to his joy, that she had not
						
						been near his father. He accompanied her himself to her protector.</p><p id="vii_8-p19">(Strange to say, he doesn't seem to have been jealous of Samsonov,
						
						which is psychologically interesting.) Then he hastens back to his
						
						ambush in the back gardens, and then learns that Smerdyakov is in a
						
						fit, that the other servant is ill- the coast is clear and he knows
						
						the 'signals'- what a temptation! Still he resists it; he goes off
						
						to a lady who has for some time been residing in the town, and who
						
						is highly esteemed among us, Madame Hohlakov. That lady, who had
						
						long watched his career with compassion, gave him the most judicious
						
						advice, to give up his dissipated life, his unseemly love-affair,
						
						the waste of his youth and vigour in pot-house debauchery, and to
						
						set off to Siberia to the gold mines: 'that would be an outlet for
						
						your turbulent energies, your romantic character, your thirst for
						
						adventure.'"</p><p id="vii_8-p20">    After describing the result of this conversation and the moment
						
						when the prisoner learnt that Grushenka had not remained at
						
						Samsonov's, the sudden frenzy of the luckless man worn out with
						
						jealousy and nervous exhaustion, at the thought that she had
						
						deceived him and was now with his father, Ippolit Kirillovitch
						
						concluded by dwelling upon the fatal influence of chance. "Had the
						
						maid told him that her mistress was at Mokroe with her former lover,
						
						nothing would have happened. But she lost her head, she could only
						
						swear and protest her ignorance, and if the prisoner did not kill
						
						her on the spot, it was only because he flew in pursuit of his false
						
						mistress.</p><p id="vii_8-p21">    "But note, frantic as he was, he took with him a brass pestle. Why
						
						that? Why not some other weapon? But since he had been contemplating
						
						his plan and preparing himself for it for a whole month, he would
						
						snatch up anything like a weapon that caught his eye. He had
						
						realised for a month past that any object of the kind would serve as a
						
						weapon, so he instantly, without hesitation, recognised that it
						
						would serve his purpose. So it was by no means unconsciously, by no
						
						means involuntarily, that he snatched up that fatal pestle. And then
						
						we find him in his father's garden- the coast is clear, there are no
						
						witnesses, darkness and jealousy. The suspicion that she was there,
						
						with him, with his rival, in his arms, and perhaps laughing at him
						
						at that moment- took his breath away. And it was not mere suspicion,
						
						the deception was open, obvious. She must be there, in that lighted
						
						room, she must be behind the screen; and the unhappy man would have us
						
						believe that he stole up to the window, peeped respectfully in, and
						
						discreetly withdrew, for fear something terrible and immoral should
						
						happen. And he tries to persuade us of that, us, who understand his
						
						character, who know his state of mind at the moment, and that he
						
						knew the signals by which he could at once enter the house." At this
						
						point Ippolit Kirillovitch broke off to discuss exhaustively the
						
						suspected connection of Smerdyakov with the murder. He did this very
						
						circumstantially, and everyone realised that, although he professed to
						
						despise that suspicion, he thought the subject of great importance.</p>
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 8 - A Treatise on Smerdyakov" prev="vii_8" next="ix_3" id="viii_5">
					
							<p id="viii_5-p1">"TO begin with, what was the source of this suspicion?" (Ippolit
						
						Kirillovitch began). "The first person who cried out that Smerdyakov
						
						had committed the murder was the prisoner himself at the moment of his
						
						arrest, yet from that time to this he had not brought forward a single
						
						fact to confirm the charge, nor the faintest suggestion of a fact. The
						
						charge is confirmed by three persons only- the two brothers of the
						
						prisoner and Madame Svyetlov. The elder of these brothers expressed
						
						his suspicions only to-day, when he was undoubtedly suffering from
						
						brain fever. But we know that for the last two months he has
						
						completely shared our conviction of his brother's guilt and did not
						
						attempt to combat that idea. But of that later. The younger brother
						
						has admitted that he has not the slightest fact to support his
						
						notion of Smerdyakov's guilt, and has only been led to that conclusion
						
						from the prisoner's own words and the expression of his face. Yes,
						
						that astounding piece of evidence has been brought forward twice
						
						to-day by him. Madame Svyetslov was even more astounding. 'What the
						
						prisoner tells you, you must believe; he is not a man to tell a
						
						lie.' That is all the evidence against Smerdyakov produced by these
						
						three persons. who are all deeply concerned in the prisoner's fate.</p><p id="viii_5-p2">And yet the theory of Smerdyakov's guilt has been noised about, has
						
						been and is still maintained. Is it credible? Is it conceivable?"
						
							</p><p id="viii_5-p3">Here Ippolit Kirillovitch thought it necessary to describe the
						
						personality of Smerdyakov, "who had cut short his life in a fit of
						
						insanity." He depicted him as a man of weak intellect, with a
						
						smattering of education, who had been thrown off his balance by
						
						philosophical ideas above his level and certain modern theories of
						
						duty, which he learnt in practice from the reckless life of his
						
						master, who was also perhaps his father- Fyodor Pavlovitch; and,
						
						theoretically, from various strange philosophical conversations with
						
						his master's elder son, Ivan Fyodorovitch, who readily indulged in
						
						this diversion, probably feeling dull or wishing to amuse himself at
						
						the valet's expense. "He spoke to me himself of his spiritual
						
						condition during the last few days at his father's house," Ippolit
						
						Kirillovitch explained; "but others too have borne witness to it-
						
						the prisoner himself, his brother, and the servant Grigory- that is,
						
						all who knew him well.</p><p id="viii_5-p4">    "Moreover, Smerdyakov, whose health was shaken by his attacks of
						
						epilepsy, had not the courage of a chicken. 'He fell at my feet and
						
						kissed them,' the prisoner himself has told us, before he realised how
						
						damaging such a statement was to himself. 'He is an epileptic
						
						chicken,' he declared about him in his characteristic language. And
						
						the prisoner chose him for his confidant (we have his own word for it)
						
						and he frightened him into consenting at last to act as a spy for him.</p><p id="viii_5-p5">In that capacity he deceived his master, revealing to the prisoner the
						
						existence of the envelope with the notes in it and the signals by
						
						means of which he could get into the house. How could he help
						
						telling him, indeed? 'He would have killed me, I could see that he
						
						would have killed me,' he said at the inquiry, trembling and shaking
						
						even before us, though his tormentor was by that time arrested and
						
						could do him no harm. 'He suspected me at every instant. In fear and
						
						trembling I hastened to tell him every secret to pacify him, that he
						
						might see that I had not deceived him and let me off alive.' Those are
						
						his own words. I wrote them down and I remember them. 'When he began
						
						shouting at me, I would fall on my knees.'
						
							</p><p id="viii_5-p6">"He was naturally very honest and enjoyed the complete
						
						confidence of his master, ever since he had restored him some money he
						
						had lost. So it may be supposed that the poor fellow suffered pangs of
						
						remorse at having deceived his master, whom he loved as his
						
						benefactor. Persons severely afflicted with epilepsy are, so the
						
						most skilful doctors tell us, always prone to continual and morbid
						
						self-reproach. They worry over their 'wickedness,' they are
						
						tormented by pangs of conscience, often entirely without cause; they
						
						exaggerate and often invent all sorts of faults and crimes. And here
						
						we have a man of that type who had really been driven to wrongdoing by
						
						terror and intimidation.</p><p id="viii_5-p7">    "He had, besides, a strong presentiment that something terrible
						
						would be the outcome of the situation that was developing before his
						
						eyes. When Ivan Fyodorovitch was leaving for Moscow, just before the
						
						catastrophe, Smerdyakov besought him to remain, though he was too
						
						timid to tell him plainly what he feared. He confined himself to
						
						hints, but his hints were not understood.</p><p id="viii_5-p8">    "It must be observed that he looked on Ivan Fyodorovitch as a
						
						protector, whose presence in the house was a guarantee that no harm
						
						would come to pass. Remember the phrase in Dmitri Karamazov's
						
						drunken letter, 'I shall kill the old man, if only Ivan goes away.' So
						
						Ivan Fyodorovitch's presence seemed to everyone a guarantee of peace
						
						and order in the house.</p><p id="viii_5-p9">    "But he went away, and within an hour of his young master's
						
						departure Smerdyakov was taken with an epileptic fit. But that's
						
						perfectly intelligible. Here I must mention that Smerdyakov, oppressed
						
						by terror and despair of a sort, had felt during those last few days
						
						that one of the fits from which he had suffered before at moments of
						
						strain, might be coming upon him again. The day and hour of such an
						
						attack cannot, of course, be foreseen, but every epileptic can feel
						
						beforehand that he is likely to have one. So the doctors tell us.</p><p id="viii_5-p10">And so, as soon as Ivan Fyodorovitch had driven out of the yard,
						
						Smerdyakov, depressed by his lonely and unprotected position, went
						
						to the cellar. He went down the stairs wondering if he would have a
						
						fit or not, and what if it were to come upon him at once. And that
						
						very apprehension, that very wonder, brought on the spasm in his
						
						throat that always precedes such attacks, and he fell unconscious into
						
						the cellar. And in this perfectly natural occurrence people try to
						
						detect a suspicion, a hint that he was shamming an attack on
						
						purpose. But, if it were on purpose, the question arises at once, what
						
						was his motive? What was he reckoning on? What was he aiming at? I say
						
						nothing about medicine: science, I am told, may go astray: the doctors
						
						were not able to discriminate between the counterfeit and the real.</p><p id="viii_5-p11">That may be so, but answer me one question: what motive had he for
						
						such a counterfeit? Could he, had he been plotting the murder, have
						
						desired to attract the attention of the household by having a fit just
						
						before?</p><p id="viii_5-p12" /><p id="viii_5-p13">"You see, gentlemen of the jury, on the night of the murder, there
						
						were five persons in Fyodor Pavlovitch's- Fyodor Pavlovitch himself
						
						(but he did not kill himself, that's evident); then his servant,
						
						Grigory, but he was almost killed himself; the third person was
						
						Grigory's wife, Marfa Ignatyevna, but it would be simply shameful to
						
						imagine her murdering her master. Two persons are left- the prisoner
						
						and Smerdyakov. But, if we are to believe the prisoner's statement
						
						that he is not the murderer, then Smerdyakov must have been, for there
						
						is no other alternative, no one else can be found. That is what
						
						accounts for the artful, astounding accusation against the unhappy
						
						idiot who committed suicide yesterday. Had a shadow of suspicion
						
						rested on anyone else, had there been any sixth person, I am persuaded
						
						that even the prisoner would have been ashamed to accuse Smerdyakov,
						
						and would have accused that sixth person, for to charge Smerdyakov
						
						with that murder is perfectly absurd.</p><p id="viii_5-p14">    "Gentlemen, let us lay aside psychology, let us lay aside
						
						medicine, let us even lay aside logic, let us turn only to the facts
						
						and see what the facts tell us. If Smerdyakov killed him, how did he
						
						do it? Alone or with the assistance of the prisoner? Let us consider
						
						the first alternative- that he did it alone. If he had killed him it
						
						must have been with some object, for some advantage to himself. But
						
						not having a shadow of the motive that the prisoner had for the
						
						murder- hatred, jealousy, and so on- Smerdyakov could only have
						
						murdered him for the sake of gain, in order to appropriate the three
						
						thousand roubles he had seen his master put in the envelope. And yet
						
						he tells another person- and a person most closely interested, that
						
						is, the prisoner- everything about the money and the signals, where
						
						the envelope lay, what was written on it, what it was tied up with,
						
						and, above all, told him of those signals by which he could enter
						
						the house. Did he do this simply to betray himself, or to invite to
						
						the same enterprise one who would be anxious to get that envelope
						
						for himself? 'Yes,' I shall be told, 'but he betrayed it from fear.'
						
						But how do you explain this? A man who could conceive such an
						
						audacious, savage act, and carry it out, tells facts which are known
						
						to no one else in the world, and which, if he held his tongue, no
						
						one would ever have guessed!
						
							</p><p id="viii_5-p15">"No, however cowardly he might be, if he had plotted such a crime,
						
						nothing would have induced him to tell anyone about the envelope and
						
						the signals, for that was as good as betraying himself beforehand.</p><p id="viii_5-p16">He would have invented something, he would have told some lie if he
						
						had been forced to give information, but he would have been silent
						
						about that. For, on the other hand, if he had said nothing about the
						
						money, but had committed the murder and stolen the money, no one in
						
						the world could have charged him with murder for the sake of
						
						robbery, since no one but he had seen the money, no one but he knew of
						
						its existence in the house. Even if he had been accused of the murder,
						
						it could only have been thought that he had committed it from some
						
						other motive. But since no one had observed any such motive in him
						
						beforehand, and everyone saw, on the contrary, that his master was
						
						fond of him and honoured him with his confidence, he would, of course,
						
						have been the last to be suspected. People would have suspected
						
						first the man who had a motive, a man who had himself declared he
						
						had such motives, who had made no secret of it; they would, in fact,
						
						have suspected the son of the murdered man, Dmitri Fyodorovitch. Had
						
						Smerdyakov killed and robbed him, and the son been accused of it, that
						
						would, of course, have suited Smerdyakov. Yet are we to believe
						
						that, though plotting the murder, he told that son, Dmitri, about
						
						the money, the envelope, and the signals? Is that logical? Is that
						
						clear?</p><p id="viii_5-p17" /><p id="viii_5-p18">"When the day of the murder planned by Smerdyakov came, we have
						
						him falling downstairs in a feigned fit- with what object? In the
						
						first place that Grigory, who had been intending to take his medicine,
						
						might put it off and remain on guard, seeing there was no one to
						
						look after the house, and, in the second place, I suppose, that his
						
						master seeing that there was no one to guard him, and in terror of a
						
						visit from his son, might redouble his vigilance and precaution.</p><p id="viii_5-p19">And, most of all, I suppose that he, Smerdyakov, disabled by the
						
						fit, might be carried from the kitchen, where he always slept, apart
						
						from all the rest, and where he could go in and out as he liked, to
						
						Grigory's room at the other end of the lodge, where he was always put,
						
						shut off by a screen three paces from their own bed. This was the
						
						immemorial custom established by his master and the kindhearted
						
						Marfa Ignatyevna, whenever he had a fit. There, lying behind the
						
						screen, he would most likely, to keep up the sham, have begun
						
						groaning, and so keeping them awake all night (as Grigory and his wife
						
						testified). And all this, we are to believe, that he might more
						
						conveniently get up and murder his master!
						
							</p><p id="viii_5-p20">"But I shall be told that he shammed illness on purpose that he
						
						might not be suspected and that he told the prisoner of the money
						
						and the signals to tempt him to commit the murder, and when he had
						
						murdered him and had gone away with the money, making a noise, most
						
						likely, and waking people, Smerdyakov got up, am I to believe, and
						
						went in- what for? To murder his master a second time and carry off
						
						the money that had already been stolen? Gentlemen, are you laughing? I
						
						am ashamed to put forward such suggestions, but, incredible as it
						
						seems, that's just what the prisoner alleges. When he had left the
						
						house, had knocked Grigory down and raised an alarm, he tells us
						
						Smerdyakov got up, went in and murdered his master and stole the
						
						money! I won't press the point that Smerdyakov could hardly have
						
						reckoned on this beforehand, and have foreseen that the furious and
						
						exasperated son would simply come to peep in respectfully, though he
						
						knew the signals, and beat a retreat, leaving Smerdyakov his booty.</p><p id="viii_5-p21">Gentlemen of the jury, I put this question to you in earnest: when was
						
						the moment when Smerdyakov could have committed his crime? Name that
						
						moment, or you can't accuse him.</p><p id="viii_5-p22">    "But, perhaps, the fit was a real one, the sick man suddenly
						
						recovered, heard a shout, and went out. Well- what then? He looked
						
						about him and said, 'Why not go and kill the master?' And how did he
						
						know what had happened, since he had been lying unconscious till
						
						that moment? But there's a limit to these flights of fancy.</p><p id="viii_5-p23">    "'Quite so,' some astute people will tell me, 'but what if they
						
						were in agreement? What if they murdered him together and shared the
						
						money- what then?' A weighty question, truly! And the facts to confirm
						
						it are astounding. One commits the murder and takes all the trouble
						
						while his accomplice lies on one side shamming a fit, apparently to
						
						arouse suspicion in everyone, alarm in his master and alarm in
						
						Grigory. It would be interesting to know what motives could have
						
						induced the two accomplices to form such an insane plan.</p><p id="viii_5-p24">    "But perhaps it was not a case of active complicity on
						
						Smerdyakov's part, but only of passive acquiescence; perhaps
						
						Smerdyakov was intimidated and agreed not to prevent the murder, and
						
						foreseeing that he would be blamed for letting his master be murdered,
						
						without screaming for help or resisting, he may have obtained
						
						permission from Dmitri Karamazov to get out of the way by shamming a
						
						fit- 'you may murder him as you like; it's nothing to me.' But as this
						
						attack of Smerdyakov's was bound to throw the household into
						
						confusion, Dmitri Karamazov could never have agreed to such a plan.</p><p id="viii_5-p25">I will waive that point however. Supposing that he did agree, it would
						
						still follow that Dmitri Karamazov is the murderer and the instigator,
						
						and Smerdyakov is only a passive accomplice, and not even an
						
						accomplice, but merely acquiesced against his will through terror.</p><p id="viii_5-p26">    "But what do we see? As soon as he is arrested the prisoner
						
						instantly throws all the blame on Smerdyakov, not accusing him of
						
						being his accomplice, but of being himself the murderer. 'He did it
						
						alone,' he says. 'He murdered and robbed him. It was the work of his
						
						hands.' Strange sort of accomplices who begin to accuse one another at
						
						once! And think of the risk for Karamazov. After committing the murder
						
						while his accomplice lay in bed, he throws the blame on the invalid,
						
						who might well have resented it and in self-preservation might well
						
						have confessed the truth. For he might well have seen that the court
						
						would at once judge how far he was responsible, and so he might well
						
						have reckoned that if he were punished, it would be far less
						
						severely than the real murderer. But in that case he would have been
						
						certain to make a confession, yet he has not done so. Smerdyakov never
						
						hinted at their complicity, though the actual murderer persisted in
						
						accusing him and declaring that he had committed the crime alone.</p><p id="viii_5-p27">    "What's more, Smerdyakov at the inquiry volunteered the
						
						statement that it was he who had told the prisoner of the envelope
						
						of notes and of the signals, and that, but for him, he would have
						
						known nothing about them. If he had really been a guilty accomplice,
						
						would he so readily have made this statement at the inquiry? On the
						
						contrary, he would have tried to conceal it, to distort the facts or
						
						minimise them. But he was far from distorting or minimising them. No
						
						one but an innocent man, who had no fear of being charged with
						
						complicity, could have acted as he did. And in a fit of melancholy
						
						arising from his disease and this catastrophe he hanged himself
						
						yesterday. He left a note written in his peculiar language, 'I destroy
						
						myself of my own will and inclination so as to throw no blame on
						
						anyone.' What would it have cost him to add: 'I am the murderer, not
						
						Karamazov'? But that he did not add. Did his conscience lead him to
						
						suicide and not to avowing his guilt?</p><p id="viii_5-p28" /><p id="viii_5-p29">"And what followed? Notes for three thousand roubles were
						
						brought into the court just now, and we were told that they were the
						
						same that lay in the envelope now on the table before us, and that the
						
						witness had received them from Smerdyakov the day before. But I need
						
						not recall the painful scene, though I will make one or two
						
						comments, selecting such trivial ones as might not be obvious at first
						
						sight to everyone, and so may be overlooked. In the first place,
						
						Smerdyakov must have given back the money and hanged himself yesterday
						
						from remorse. And only yesterday he confessed his guilt to Ivan
						
						Karamazov, as the latter informs us. If it were not so, indeed, why
						
						should Ivan Fyodorovitch have kept silence till now? And so, if he has
						
						confessed, then why, I ask again, did he not avow the whole truth in
						
						the last letter he left behind, knowing that the innocent prisoner had
						
						to face this terrible ordeal the next day?</p><p id="viii_5-p30" /><p id="viii_5-p31">"The money alone is no proof. A week ago, quite by chance, the
						
						fact came to the knowledge of myself and two other persons in this
						
						court that Ivan Fyodorovitch had sent two five per cent coupons of
						
						five thousand each- that is, ten thousand in all- to the chief town of
						
						the province to be changed. I only mention this to point out that
						
						anyone may have money, and that it can't be proved that these notes
						
						are the same as were in Fyodor Pavlovitch's envelope.</p><p id="viii_5-p32">    "Ivan Karamazov, after receiving yesterday a communication of such
						
						importance from the real murderer, did not stir. Why didn't he
						
						report it at once? Why did he put it all off till morning? I think I
						
						have a right to conjecture why. His health had been giving way for a
						
						week past: he had admitted to a doctor and to his most intimate
						
						friends that he was suffering from hallucinations and seeing
						
						phantoms of the dead: he was on the eve of the attack of brain fever
						
						by which he has been stricken down to-day. In this condition he
						
						suddenly heard of Smerdyakov's death, and at once reflected. 'The
						
						man is dead, I can throw the blame on him and save my brother. I
						
						have money. I will take a roll of notes and say that Smerdyakov gave
						
						them me before his death.' You will say that was dishonourable: it's
						
						dishonourable to slander even the dead, and even to save a brother.</p><p id="viii_5-p33">True, but what if he slandered him unconsciously? What if, finally
						
						unhinged by the sudden news of the valet's death, he imagined it
						
						really was so? You saw the recent scene: you have seen the witness's
						
						condition. He was standing up and was speaking, but where was his
						
						mind?</p><p id="viii_5-p34">    "Then followed the document, the prisoner's letter written two
						
						days before the crime, and containing a complete programme of the
						
						murder. Why, then, are we looking for any other programme? The crime
						
						was committed precisely according to this programme, and by no other
						
						than the writer of it. Yes, gentlemen of the jury, it went off without
						
						a hitch! He did not run respectfully and timidly away from his
						
						father's window, though he was firmly convinced that the object of his
						
						affections was with him. No, that is absurd and unlikely! He went in
						
						and murdered him. Most likely he killed him in anger, burning with
						
						resentment, as soon as he looked on his hated rival. But having killed
						
						him, probably with one blow of the brass pestle, and having
						
						convinced himself, after careful search, that she was not there, he
						
						did not, however, forget to put his hand under the pillow and take out
						
						the envelope, the torn cover of which lies now on the table before us.</p><p id="viii_5-p35">    "I mention this fact that you may note one, to my thinking, very
						
						characteristic circumstance. Had he been an experienced murderer and
						
						had he committed the murder for the sake of gain only, would he have
						
						left the torn envelope on the floor as it was found, beside the
						
						corpse? Had it been Smerdyakov, for instance, murdering his master
						
						to rob him, he would have simply carried away the envelope with him,
						
						without troubling himself to open it over his victim's corpse, for
						
						he would have known for certain that the notes were in the envelope-
						
						they had been put in and sealed up in his presence- and had he taken
						
						the envelope with him, no one would ever have known of the robbery.</p><p id="viii_5-p36">I ask you, gentlemen, would Smerdyakov have behaved in that way? Would
						
						he have left the envelope on the floor?</p><p id="viii_5-p37">    "No, this was the action of a frantic murderer, a murderer who was
						
						not a thief and had never stolen before that day, who snatched the
						
						notes from under the pillow, not like a thief stealing them, but as
						
						though seizing his own property from the thief who had stolen it.</p><p id="viii_5-p38">For that was the idea which had become almost an insane obsession in
						
						Dmitri Karamazov in regard to that money. And pouncing upon the
						
						envelope, which he had never seen before, he tore it open to make sure
						
						whether the money was in it, and ran away with the money in his
						
						pocket, even forgetting to consider that he had left an astounding
						
						piece of evidence against himself in that torn envelope on the
						
						floor. All because it was Karamazov, not Smerdyakov, he didn't
						
						think, he didn't reflect, and how should he? He ran away; he heard
						
						behind him the servant cry out; the old man caught him, stopped him
						
						and was felled to the ground by the brass pestle.</p><p id="viii_5-p39">    "The prisoner, moved by pity, leapt down to look at him. Would you
						
						believe it, he tells us that he leapt down out of pity, out of
						
						compassion, to see whether he could do anything for him. Was that a
						
						moment to show compassion? No; he jumped down simply to make certain
						
						whether the only witness of his crime were dead or alive. Any other
						
						feeling, any other motive would be unnatural. Note that he took
						
						trouble over Grigory, wiped his head with his handkerchief and,
						
						convincing himself he was dead, he ran to the house of his mistress,
						
						dazed and covered with blood. How was it he never thought that he
						
						was covered with blood and would be at once detected? But the prisoner
						
						himself assures us that he did not even notice that he was covered
						
						with blood. That may be believed, that is very possible, that always
						
						happens at such moments with criminals. On one point they will show
						
						diabolical cunning, while another will escape them altogether. But
						
						he was thinking at that moment of one thing only- where was she? He
						
						wanted to find out at once where she was, so he ran to her lodging and
						
						learnt an unexpected and astounding piece of news- she had gone off to
						
						Mokroe to meet her first lover."</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 9 - The Galloping Troika. The End of the Prosecutor's Speech" prev="viii_5" next="x_2" id="ix_3">
					


							<p id="ix_3-p1">IPPOLIT KIRILLOVITCH had chosen the historial method of
						
						exposition, beloved by all nervous orators, who find in its limitation
						
						a check on their own eager rhetoric. At this moment in his speech he
						
						went off into a dissertation on Grushenka's "first lover," and brought
						
						forward several interesting thoughts on this theme.</p><p id="ix_3-p2">    "Karamazov, who had been frantically jealous of everyone,
						
						collapsed, so to speak, and effaced himself at once before this
						
						first lover. What makes it all the more strange is that he seems to
						
						have hardly thought of this formidable rival. But he had looked upon
						
						him as a remote danger, and Karamazov always lives in the present.</p><p id="ix_3-p3">Possibly he regarded him as a fiction. But his wounded heart grasped
						
						instantly that the woman had been concealing this new rival and
						
						deceiving him, because he was anything but a fiction to her, because
						
						he was the one hope of her life. Grasping this instantly, he
						
						resigned himself.</p><p id="ix_3-p4">    "Gentlemen of the jury, I cannot help dwelling on this
						
						unexpected trait in the prisoner's character. He suddenly evinces an
						
						irresistible desire for justice, a respect for woman and a recognition
						
						of her right to love. And all this at the very moment when he had
						
						stained his hands with his father's blood for her sake! It is true
						
						that the blood he had shed was already crying out for vengeance,
						
						for, after having ruined his soul and his life in this world, he was
						
						forced to ask himself at that same instant what he was and what he
						
						could be now to her, to that being, dearer to him than his own soul,
						
						in comparison with that former lover who had returned penitent, with
						
						new love, to the woman he had once betrayed, with honourable offers,
						
						with the promise of a reformed and happy life. And he, luckless man,
						
						what could he give her now, what could he offer her?</p><p id="ix_3-p5">    "Karamazov felt all this, knew that all ways were barred to him by
						
						his crime and that he was a criminal under sentence, and not a man
						
						with life before him! This thought crushed him. And so he instantly
						
						flew to one frantic plan, which, to a man of Karamazov's character,
						
						must have appeared the one inevitable way out of his terrible
						
						position. That way out was suicide. He ran for the pistols he had left
						
						in pledge with his friend Perhotin and on the way, as he ran, he
						
						pulled out of his pocket the money, for the sake of which he had
						
						stained his hands with his father's gore. Oh, now he needed money more
						
						than ever. Karamazov would die, Karamazov would shoot himself and it
						
						should be remembered! To be sure, he was a poet and had burnt the
						
						candle at both ends all his life. 'To her, to her! and there, oh,
						
						there I will give a feast to the whole world, such as never was
						
						before, that will be remembered and talked of long after! In the midst
						
						of shouts of wild merriment, reckless gypsy songs and dances I shall
						
						raise the glass and drink to the woman I adore and her new-found
						
						happiness! And then, on the spot, at her feet, I shall dash out my
						
						brains before her and punish myself! She will remember Mitya Karamazov
						
						sometimes, she will see how Mitya loved her, she will feel for Mitya!'</p><p id="ix_3-p6">    "Here we see in excess a love of effect, a romantic despair and
						
						sentimentality, and the wild recklessness of the Karamazovs. Yes,
						
						but there is something else, gentlemen of the jury, something that
						
						cries out in the soul, throbs incessantly in the mind, and poisons the
						
						heart unto death- that something is conscience, gentlemen of the jury,
						
						its judgment, its terrible torments! The pistol will settle
						
						everything, the pistol is the only way out! But beyond- I don't know
						
						whether Karamazov wondered at that moment 'What lies beyond,'</p><p id="ix_3-p7">whether Karamazov could, like Hamlet, wonder 'What lies beyond.' No,
						
						gentlemen of the jury, they have their Hamlets, but we still have
						
						our Karamazovs!"</p><p id="ix_3-p8">    Here Ippolit Kirillovitch drew a minute picture of Mitya's
						
						preparations, the scene at Perhotin's, at the shop, with the
						
						drivers. He quoted numerous words and actions, confirmed by witnesses,
						
						and the picture made a terrible impression on the audience. The
						
						guilt of this harassed and desperate man stood out clear and
						
						convincing, when the facts were brought together.</p><p id="ix_3-p9">    "What need had he of precaution? Two or three times he almost
						
						confessed, hinted at it, all but spoke out." (Then followed the
						
						evidence given by witnesses.) "He even cried out to the peasant who
						
						drove him, 'Do you know, you are driving a murderer!' But it was
						
						impossible for him to speak out, he had to get to Mokroe and there
						
						to finish his romance. But what was awaiting the luckless man?</p><p id="ix_3-p10">Almost from the first minute at Mokroe he saw that his invincible
						
						rival was perhaps by no means so invincible, that the toast to their
						
						new-found happiness was not desired and would not be acceptable. But
						
						you know the facts, gentlemen of the jury, from the preliminary
						
						inquiry. Karamazov's triumph over his rival was complete and his
						
						soul passed into quite a new phase, perhaps the most terrible phase
						
						through which his soul has passed or will pass.</p><p id="ix_3-p11">    "One may say with certainty, gentlemen of the jury," the
						
						prosecutor continued, "that outraged nature and the criminal heart
						
						bring their own vengeance more completely than any earthly justice.</p><p id="ix_3-p12">What's more, justice and punishment on earth positively alleviate
						
						the punishment of nature and are, indeed, essential to the soul of the
						
						criminal at such moments, as its salvation from despair. For I
						
						cannot imagine the horror and moral suffering of Karamazov when he
						
						learnt that she loved him, that for his sake she had rejected her
						
						first lover, that she was summoning him, Mitya, to a new life, that
						
						she was promising him happiness- and when? When everything was over
						
						for him and nothing was possible!</p><p id="ix_3-p13">    "By the way, I will note in parenthesis a point of importance
						
						for the light it throws on the prisoner's position at the moment. This
						
						woman, this love of his, had been till the last moment, till the
						
						very instant of his arrest, a being unattainable, passionately desired
						
						by him but unattainable. Yet why did he not shoot himself then, why
						
						did he relinquish his design and even forget where his pistol was?</p><p id="ix_3-p14">It was just that passionate desire for love and the hope of satisfying
						
						it that restrained him. Throughout their revels he kept close to his
						
						adored mistress, who was at the banquet with him and was more charming
						
						and fascinating to him than ever- he did not leave her side, abasing
						
						himself in his homage before her.</p><p id="ix_3-p15">    "His passion might well, for a moment, stifle not only the fear of
						
						arrest, but even the torments of conscience. For a moment, oh, only
						
						for a moment! I can picture the state of mind of the criminal
						
						hopelessly enslaved by these influences- first, the influence of
						
						drink, of noise and excitement, of the thud of the dance and the
						
						scream of the song, and of her, flushed with wine, singing and dancing
						
						and laughing to him! Secondly, the hope in the background that the
						
						fatal end might still be far off, that not till next morning, at
						
						least, they would come and take him. So he had a few hours and
						
						that's much, very much! In a few hours one can think of many things. I
						
						imagine that he felt something like what criminals feel when they
						
						are being taken to the scaffold. They have another long, long street
						
						to pass down and at walking pace, past thousands of people. Then there
						
						will be a turning into another street and only at the end of that
						
						street the dread place of execution! I fancy that at the beginning
						
						of the journey the condemned man, sitting on his shameful cart, must
						
						feel that he has infinite life still before him. The houses recede,
						
						the cart moves on- oh, that's nothing, it's still far to the turning
						
						into the second street and he still looks boldly to right and to
						
						left at those thousands of callously curious people with their eyes
						
						fixed on him, and he still fancies that he is just such a man as they.</p><p id="ix_3-p16">But now the turning comes to the next street. Oh, that's nothing,
						
						nothing, there's still a whole street before him, and however many
						
						houses have been passed, he will still think there are many left.</p><p id="ix_3-p17">And so to the very end, to the very scaffold.</p><p id="ix_3-p18">    "This I imagine is how it was with Karamazov then. 'They've not
						
						had time yet,' he must have thought, 'I may still find some way out,
						
						oh, there's still time to make some plan of defence, and now, now- she
						
						is so fascinating!'</p><p id="ix_3-p19">    "His soul was full of confusion and dread, but he managed,
						
						however, to put aside half his money and hide it somewhere- I cannot
						
						otherwise explain the disappearance of quite half of the three
						
						thousand he had just taken from his father's pillow. He had been in
						
						Mokroe more than once before, he had caroused there for two days
						
						together already, he knew the old big house with all its passages
						
						and outbuildings. I imagine that part of the money was hidden in
						
						that house, not long before the arrest, in some crevice, under some
						
						floor, in some corner, under the roof. With what object? I shall be
						
						asked. Why, the catastrophe may take place at once, of course; he
						
						hadn't yet considered how to meet it, he hadn't the time, his head was
						
						throbbing and his heart was with her, but money- money was
						
						indispensable in any case! With money a man is always a man. Perhaps
						
						such foresight at such a moment may strike you as unnatural? But he
						
						assures us himself that a month before, at a critical and exciting
						
						moment, he had halved his money and sewn it up in a little bag. And
						
						though that was not true, as we shall prove directly, it shows the
						
						idea was a familiar one to Karamazov, he had contemplated it. What's
						
						more, when he declared at the inquiry that he had put fifteen
						
						hundred roubles in a bag (which never existed) he may have invented
						
						that little bag on the inspiration of the moment, because he had two
						
						hours before divided his money and hidden half of it at Mokroe till
						
						morning, in case of emergency, simply not to have it on himself. Two
						
						extremes, gentlemen of the jury, remember that Karamazov can
						
						contemplate two extremes and both at once.</p><p id="ix_3-p20">    "We have looked in the house, but we haven't found the money. It
						
						may still be there or it may have disappeared next day and be in the
						
						prisoner's hands now. In any case he was at her side, on his knees
						
						before her, she was lying on the bed, he had his hands stretched out
						
						to her and he had so entirely forgotten everything that he did not
						
						even hear the men coming to arrest him. He hadn't time to prepare
						
						any line of defence in his mind. He was caught unawares and confronted
						
						with his judges, the arbiters of his destiny.</p><p id="ix_3-p21">    "Gentlemen of the jury, there are moments in the execution of
						
						our duties when it is terrible for us to face a man, terrible on his
						
						account, too! The moments of contemplating that animal fear, when
						
						the criminal sees that all is lost, but still struggles, still means
						
						to struggle, the moments when every instinct of self-preservation
						
						rises up in him at once and he looks at you with questioning and
						
						suffering eyes, studies you, your face, your thoughts, uncertain on
						
						which side you will strike, and his distracted mind frames thousands
						
						of plans in an instant, but he is still afraid to speak, afraid of
						
						giving himself away! This purgatory of the spirit, this animal
						
						thirst for self-preservation, these humiliating moments of the human
						
						soul, are awful, and sometimes arouse horror and compassion for the
						
						criminal even in the lawyer. And this was what we all witnessed then.</p><p id="ix_3-p22">    "At first he was thunderstruck and in his terror dropped some very
						
						compromising phrases. 'Blood! I've deserved it!' But he quickly
						
						restrained himself. He had not prepared what he was to say, what
						
						answer he was to make, he had nothing but a bare denial ready. 'I am
						
						not guilty of my father's death.' That was his fence for the moment
						
						and behind it he hoped to throw up a barricade of some sort. His first
						
						compromising exclamations he hastened to explain by declaring that
						
						he was responsible for the death of the servant Grigory only. 'Of that
						
						bloodshed I am guilty, but who has killed my father, gentlemen, who
						
						has killed him? Who can have killed him, if not I?' Do you hear, he
						
						asked us that, us, who had come to ask him that question! Do you
						
						hear that uttered with such premature haste- 'if not I'- the animal
						
						cunning, the naivete the Karamazov impatience of it? 'I didn't kill
						
						him and you mustn't think I did! I wanted to kill him, gentlemen, I
						
						wanted to kill him,' he hastens to admit (he was in a hurry, in a
						
						terrible hurry), 'but still I am not guilty, it is not I murdered
						
						him.' He concedes to us that he wanted to murder him, as though to
						
						say, you can see for yourselves how truthful I am, so you'll believe
						
						all the sooner that I didn't murder him. Oh, in such cases the
						
						criminal is often amazingly shallow and credulous.</p><p id="ix_3-p23">    "At that point one of the lawyers asked him, as it were
						
						incidentally, the most simple question, 'Wasn't it Smerdyakov killed
						
						him?' Then, as we expected, he was horribly angry at our having
						
						anticipated him and caught him unawares, before he had time to pave
						
						the way to choose and snatch the moment when it would be most
						
						natural to bring in Smerdyakov's name. He rushed at once to the
						
						other extreme, as he always does, and began to assure us that
						
						Smerdyakov could not have killed him, was not capable of it. But don't
						
						believe him, that was only his cunning; he didn't really give up the
						
						idea of Smerdyakov; on the contrary, he meant to bring him forward
						
						again; for, indeed, he had no one else to bring forward, but he
						
						would do that later, because for the moment that line was spoiled
						
						for him. He would bring him forward perhaps next day, or even a few
						
						days later, choosing an opportunity to cry out to us, 'You know I
						
						was more sceptical about Smerdyakov than you, you remember that
						
						yourselves, but now I am convinced. He killed him, he must have done!'</p><p id="ix_3-p24">And for the present he falls back upon a gloomy and irritable
						
						denial. Impatience and anger prompted him, however, to the most
						
						inept and incredible explanation of how he looked into his father's
						
						window and how he respectfully withdrew. The worst of it was that he
						
						was unaware of the position of affairs, of the evidence given by
						
						Grigory.</p><p id="ix_3-p25">    "We proceeded to search him. The search angered, but encouraged
						
						him, the whole three thousand had not been found on him, only half
						
						of it. And no doubt only at that moment of angry silence, the
						
						fiction of the little bag first occurred to him. No doubt he was
						
						conscious himself of the improbability of the story and strove
						
						painfully to make it sound more likely, to weave it into a romance
						
						that would sound plausible. In such cases the first duty, the chief
						
						task of the investigating lawyers, is to prevent the criminal being
						
						prepared, to pounce upon him unexpectedly so that he may blurt out his
						
						cherished ideas in all their simplicity, improbability and
						
						inconsistency. The criminal can only be made to speak by the sudden
						
						and apparently incidental communication of some new fact, of some
						
						circumstance of great importance in the case, of which he had no
						
						previous idea and could not have foreseen. We had such a fact in
						
						readiness- that was Grigory's evidence about the open door through
						
						which the prisoner had run out. He had completely forgotten about that
						
						door and had not even suspected that Grigory could have seen it.</p><p id="ix_3-p26">    "The effect of it was amazing. He leapt up and shouted to us,
						
						'Then Smerdyakov murdered him, it was Smerdyakov!' and so betrayed the
						
						basis of the defence he was keeping back, and betrayed it in its
						
						most improbable shape, for Smerdyakov could only have committed the
						
						murder after he had knocked Grigory down and run away. When we told
						
						him that Grigory saw the door was open before he fell down, and had
						
						heard Smerdyakov behind the screen as he came out of his bedroom-
						
						Karamazov was positively crushed. My esteemed and witty colleague,
						
						Nikolay Parfenovitch, told me afterwards that he was almost moved to
						
						tears at the sight of him. And to improve matters, the prisoner
						
						hastened to tell us about the much-talked-of little bag- so be it, you
						
						shall hear this romance!</p><p id="ix_3-p27">    "Gentlemen of the jury, I have told you already why I consider
						
						this romance not only an absurdity, but the most improbable
						
						invention that could have been brought forward in the circumstances.</p><p id="ix_3-p28">If one tried for a bet to invent the most unlikely story, one could
						
						hardly find anything more incredible. The worst of such stories is
						
						that the triumphant romancers can always be put to confusion and
						
						crushed by the very details in which real life is so rich and which
						
						these unhappy and involuntary storytellers neglect as insignificant
						
						trifles. Oh, they have no thought to spare for such details, their
						
						minds are concentrated on their grand invention as a whole, and
						
						fancy anyone daring to pull them up for a trifle! But that's how
						
						they are caught. The prisoner was asked the question, 'Where did you
						
						get the stuff for your little bag and who made it for you?' 'I made it
						
						myself.' 'And where did you get the linen?' The prisoner was
						
						positively offended, he thought it almost insulting to ask him such
						
						a trivial question, and would you believe it, his resentment was
						
						genuine! But they are all like that. 'I tore it off my shirt. "Then we
						
						shall find that shirt among your linen to-morrow, with a piece torn
						
						off.' And only fancy, gentlemen of the jury, if we really had found
						
						that torn shirt (and how could we have failed to find it in his
						
						chest of drawers or trunk?) that would have been a fact, a material
						
						fact in support of his statement! But he was incapable of that
						
						reflection. 'I don't remember, it may not have been off my shirt, I
						
						sewed it up in one of my landlady's caps.' 'What sort of a cap?' 'It
						
						was an old cotton rag of hers lying about.' 'And do you remember
						
						that clearly?' 'No, I don't.' And he was angry, very angry, and yet
						
						imagine not remembering it! At the most terrible moments of man's
						
						life, for instance when he is being led to execution, he remembers
						
						just such trifles. He will forget anything but some green roof that
						
						has flashed past him on the road, or a jackdaw on a cross- that he
						
						will remember. He concealed the making of that little bag from his
						
						household, he must have remembered his humiliating fear that someone
						
						might come in and find him needle in hand, how at the slightest
						
						sound he slipped behind the screen (there is a screen in his
						
						lodgings).</p><p id="ix_3-p29">    "But, gentlemen of the jury, why do I tell you all this, all these
						
						details, trifles?" cried Ippolit Kirillovitch suddenly. "Just
						
						because the prisoner still persists in these absurdities to this
						
						moment. He has not explained anything since that fatal night two
						
						months ago, he has not added one actual illuminating fact to his
						
						former fantastic statements; all those are trivialities. 'You must
						
						believe it on my honour.' Oh, we are glad to believe it, we are
						
						eager to believe it, even if only on his word of honour! Are we
						
						jackals thirsting for human blood? Show us a single fact in the
						
						prisoner's favour and we shall rejoice; but let it be a substantial,
						
						real fact, and not a conclusion drawn from the prisoner's expression
						
						by his own brother, or that when he beat himself on the breast he must
						
						have meant to point to the little bag, in the darkness, too. We
						
						shall rejoice at the new fact, we shall be the first to repudiate
						
						our charge, we shall hasten to repudiate it. But now justice cries out
						
						and we persist, we cannot repudiate anything."</p><p id="ix_3-p30">    Ippolit Kirillovitch passed to his final peroration. He looked
						
						as though he was in a fever, he spoke of the blood that cried for
						
						vengeance, the blood of the father murdered by his son, with the
						
						base motive of robbery! He pointed to the tragic and glaring
						
						consistency of the facts.</p><p id="ix_3-p31">    "And whatever you may hear from the talented and celebrated
						
						counsel for the defence," Ippolit Kirillovitch could not resist
						
						adding, "whatever eloquent and touching appeals may be made to your
						
						sensibilities, remember that at this moment you are in a temple of
						
						justice. Remember that you are the champions of our justice, the
						
						champions of our holy Russia, of her principles, her family,
						
						everything that she holds sacred! Yes, you represent Russia here at
						
						this moment, and your verdict will be heard not in this hall only
						
						but will re-echo throughout the whole of Russia, and all Russia will
						
						hear you, as her champions and her judges, and she will be
						
						encouraged or disheartened by your verdict. Do not disappoint Russia
						
						and her expectations. Our fatal troika dashes on in her headlong
						
						flight perhaps to destruction and in all Russia for long past men have
						
						stretched out imploring hands and called a halt to its furious
						
						reckless course. And if other nations stand aside from that troika
						
						that may be, not from respect, as the poet would fain believe, but
						
						simply from horror. From horror, perhaps from disgust. And well it
						
						is that they stand aside, but maybe they will cease one day to do so
						
						and will form a firm wall confronting the hurrying apparition and will
						
						check the frenzied rush of our lawlessness, for the sake of their
						
						own safety, enlightenment and civilisation. Already we have heard
						
						voices of alarm from Europe, they already begin to sound. Do not tempt
						
						them! Do not heap up their growing hatred by a sentence justifying the
						
						murder of a father by his son I
						
							Though Ippolit Kirillovitch was genuinely moved, he wound up his
						
						speech with this rhetorical appeal- and the effect produced by him was
						
						extraordinary. When he had finished his speech, he went out
						
						hurriedly and, as I have mentioned before, almost fainted in the
						
						adjoining room. There was no applause in the court, but serious
						
						persons were pleased. The ladies were not so well satisfied, though
						
						even they were pleased with his eloquence, especially as they had no
						
						apprehensions as to the upshot of the trial and had full trust in
						
						Fetyukovitch. "He will speak at last and of course carry all before
						
						him."</p><p id="ix_3-p32">    Everyone looked at Mitya; he sat silent through the whole of the
						
						prosecutor's speech, clenching his teeth, with his hands clasped,
						
						and his head bowed. Only from time to time he raised his head and
						
						listened, especially when Grushenka was spoken of. When the prosecutor
						
						mentioned Rakitin's opinion of her, a smile of contempt and anger
						
						passed over his face and he murmured rather audibly, "The Bernards!"</p><p id="ix_3-p33">When Ippolit Kirillovitch described how he had questioned and tortured
						
						him at Mokroe, Mitya raised his head and listened with intense
						
						curiosity. At one point he seemed about to jump up and cry out, but
						
						controlled himself and only shrugged his shoulders disdainfully.</p><p id="ix_3-p34">People talked afterwards of the end of the speech, of the prosecutor's
						
						feat in examining the prisoner at Mokroe, and jeered at Ippolit
						
						Kirillovitch. "The man could not resist boasting of his cleverness,"</p><p id="ix_3-p35">they said.</p><p id="ix_3-p36">    The court was adjourned, but only for a short interval, a
						
						quarter of an hour or twenty minutes at most. There was a hum of
						
						conversation and exclamations in the audience. I remember some of
						
						them.</p><p id="ix_3-p37">    "A weighty speech," a gentleman in one group observed gravely.</p><p id="ix_3-p38">    "He brought in too much psychology," said another voice.</p><p id="ix_3-p39">    "But it was all true, the absolute truth!"</p><p id="ix_3-p40">    "Yes, he is first rate at it."</p><p id="ix_3-p41">    "He summed it all up."</p><p id="ix_3-p42">    "Yes, he summed us up, too," chimed in another voice, "Do you
						
						remember, at the beginning of his speech, making out we were all
						
						like Fyodor Pavlovitch?"</p><p id="ix_3-p43">    "And at the end, too. But that was all rot."</p><p id="ix_3-p44">    "And obscure too."</p><p id="ix_3-p45">    "He was a little too much carried away."</p><p id="ix_3-p46">    "It's unjust, it's unjust."</p><p id="ix_3-p47">    "No, it was smartly done, anyway. He's had long to wait, but
						
						he's had his say, ha ha!"</p><p id="ix_3-p48">    "What will the counsel for the defence say?"</p><p id="ix_3-p49">    In another group I heard:</p><p id="ix_3-p50">    "He had no business to make a thrust at the Petersburg man like
						
						that; 'appealing to your sensibilities'- do you remember?"</p><p id="ix_3-p51">    "Yes, that was awkward of him."</p><p id="ix_3-p52">    "He was in too great a hurry."</p><p id="ix_3-p53">    "He is a nervous man."</p><p id="ix_3-p54">    "We laugh, but what must the prisoner be feeling?"</p><p id="ix_3-p55">    "Yes, what must it be for Mitya?"</p><p id="ix_3-p56">    In a third group:</p><p id="ix_3-p57">    "What lady is that, the fat one, with the lorgnette, sitting at
						
						the end?"</p><p id="ix_3-p58">    "She is a general's wife, divorced, I know her."</p><p id="ix_3-p59">    "That's why she has the lorgnette."</p><p id="ix_3-p60">    "She is not good for much."</p><p id="ix_3-p61">    "Oh no, she is a piquante little woman."</p><p id="ix_3-p62">    "Two places beyond her there is a little fair woman, she is
						
						prettier."</p><p id="ix_3-p63">    "They caught him smartly at Mokroe, didn't they, eh?"</p><p id="ix_3-p64">    "Oh, it was smart enough. We've heard it before, how often he
						
						has told the story at people's houses!</p><p id="ix_3-p65">    "And he couldn't resist doing it now. That's vanity."</p><p id="ix_3-p66">    "He is a man with a grievance, he he!"</p><p id="ix_3-p67">    "Yes, and quick to take offence. And there was too much
						
						rhetoric, such long sentences."</p><p id="ix_3-p68">    "Yes, he tries to alarm us, he kept trying to alarm us. Do you
						
						remember about the troika? Something about 'They have Hamlets, but
						
						we have, so far, only Karamazovs!' That was cleverly said!"</p><p id="ix_3-p69">    "That was to propitiate the liberals. He is afraid of them."</p><p id="ix_3-p70">    "Yes, and he is afraid of the lawyer, too."</p><p id="ix_3-p71">    "Yes, what will Fetyukovitch say?"</p><p id="ix_3-p72">    "Whatever he says, he won't get round our peasants."</p><p id="ix_3-p73">    "Don't you think so?"</p><p id="ix_3-p74">    A fourth group:</p><p id="ix_3-p75">    "What he said about the troika was good, that piece about the
						
						other nations."</p><p id="ix_3-p76">    "And that was true what he said about other nations not standing
						
						it."</p><p id="ix_3-p77">    "What do you mean?"</p><p id="ix_3-p78">    "Why, in the English Parliment a Member got up last week and
						
						speaking about the Nihilists asked the Ministry whether it was not
						
						high time to intervene, to educate this barbarous people. Ippolit
						
						was thinking of him, I know he was. He was talking about that last
						
						week."</p><p id="ix_3-p79">    "Not an easy job."</p><p id="ix_3-p80">    "Not an easy job? Why not?"</p><p id="ix_3-p81">    "Why, we'd shut up Kronstadt and not let them have any corn. Where
						
						would they get it?"</p><p id="ix_3-p82">    "In America. They get it from America now."</p><p id="ix_3-p83">    "Nonsense!"</p><p id="ix_3-p84">    But the bell rang, all rushed to their places. Fetyukovitch
						
						mounted the tribune.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 10 - The Speech for the Defence. An Argument that Cuts Both Ways" prev="ix_3" next="xi_1" id="x_2">
					

							<p id="x_2-p1">ALL was hushed as the first words of the famous orator rang out.</p><p id="x_2-p2">The eyes of the audience were fastened upon him. He began very
						
						simply and directly, with an air of conviction, but not the
						
						slightest trace of conceit. He made no attempt at eloquence, at
						
						pathos, or emotional phrases. He was like a man speaking in a circle
						
						of intimate and sympathetic friends. His voice was a fine one,
						
						sonorous and sympathetic, and there was something genuine and simple
						
						in the very sound of it. But everyone realised at once that the
						
						speaker might suddenly rise to genuine pathos and "pierce the heart
						
						with untold power." His language was perhaps more irregular than
						
						Ippolit Kirillovitch's, but he spoke without long phrases, and indeed,
						
						with more precision. One thing did not please the ladies: he kept
						
						bending forward, especially at the beginning of his speech, not
						
						exactly bowing, but as though he were about to dart at his
						
						listeners, bending his long spine in half, as though there were a
						
						spring in the middle that enabled him to bend almost at right angles.</p><p id="x_2-p3">    At the beginning of his speech he spoke rather disconnectedly,
						
						without system, one may say, dealing with facts separately, though, at
						
						the end, these facts formed a whole. His speech might be divided
						
						into two parts, the first consisting of criticism in refutation of the
						
						charge, sometimes malicious and sarcastic. But in the second half he
						
						suddenly changed his tone, and even his manner, and at once rose to
						
						pathos. The audience seemed on the lookout for it, and quivered with
						
						enthusiasm.</p><p id="x_2-p4">    He went straight to the point, and began by saying that although
						
						he practised in Petersburg, he had more than once visited provincial
						
						towns to defend prisoners, of whose innocence he had a conviction or
						
						at least a preconceived idea. "That is what has happened to me in
						
						the present case," he explained. "From the very first accounts in
						
						the newspapers I was struck by something which strongly prepossessed
						
						me in the prisoner's favour. What interested me most was a fact
						
						which often occurs in legal practice, but rarely, I think, in such
						
						an extreme and peculiar form as in the present case. I ought to
						
						formulate that peculiarity only at the end of my speech, but I will do
						
						so at the very beginning, for it is my weakness to go to work
						
						directly, not keeping my effects in reserve and economising my
						
						material. That may be imprudent on my part, but at least it's sincere.</p><p id="x_2-p5">What I have in my mind is this: there is an overwhelming chain of
						
						evidence against the prisoner, and at the same time not one fact
						
						that will stand criticism, if it is examined separately. As I followed
						
						the case more closely in the papers my idea was more and more
						
						confirmed, and I suddenly received from the prisoner's relatives a
						
						request to undertake his defence. I at once hurried here, and here I
						
						became completely convinced. It was to break down this terrible
						
						chain of facts, and to show that each piece of evidence taken
						
						separately was unproved and fantastic, that I undertook the case."</p><p id="x_2-p6">    So Fetyukovitch began.</p><p id="x_2-p7">    "Gentlemen of the jury," he suddenly protested, "I am new to
						
						this district. I have no preconceived ideas. The prisoner, a man of
						
						turbulent and unbridled temper, has not insulted me. But he has
						
						insulted perhaps hundreds of persons in this town, and so prejudiced
						
						many people against him beforehand. Of course I recognise that the
						
						moral sentiment of local society is justly excited against him. The
						
						prisoner is of turbulent and violent temper. Yet he was received in
						
						society here; he was even welcome in the family of my talented friend,
						
						the prosecutor."</p><p id="x_2-p8">    (N.B. At these words there were two or three laughs in the
						
						audience, quickly suppressed, but noticed by all. All of us knew
						
						that the prosecutor received Mitya against his will, solely because he
						
						had somehow interested his wife- a lady of the highest virtue and
						
						moral worth, but fanciful, capricious, and fond of opposing her
						
						husband, especially in trifles. Mitya's visits, however, had not
						
						been frequent.)</p><p id="x_2-p9">
						
							"Nevertheless I venture to suggest," Fetyukovitch continued, "that
						
						in spite of his independent mind and just character, my opponent may
						
						have formed a mistaken prejudice against my unfortunate client. Oh,
						
						that is so natural; the unfortunate man has only too well deserved
						
						such prejudice. Outraged morality, and still more outraged taste, is
						
						often relentless. We have, in the talented prosecutor's speech,
						
						heard a stern analysis of the prisoner's character and conduct, and
						
						his severe critical attitude to the case was evident. And, what's
						
						more, he went into psychological subtleties into which he could not
						
						have entered, if he had the least conscious and malicious prejudice
						
						against the prisoner. But there are things which are even worse,
						
						even more fatal in such cases, than the most malicious and consciously
						
						unfair attitude. It is worse if we are carried away by the artistic
						
						instinct, by the desire to create, so to speak, a romance,
						
						especially if God has endowed us with psychological insight. Before
						
						I started on my way here, I was warned in Petersburg, and was myself
						
						aware, that I should find here a talented opponent whose psychological
						
						insight and subtlety had gained him peculiar renown in legal circles
						
						of recent years. But profound as psychology is, it's a knife that cuts
						
						both ways." (Laughter among the public.) "You will, of course, forgive
						
						me my comparison; I can't boast of eloquence. But I will take as an
						
						example any point in the prosecutor's speech.</p><p id="x_2-p10">    "The prisoner, running away in the garden in the dark, climbed
						
						over the fence, was seized by the servant, and knocked him down with a
						
						brass pestle. Then he jumped back into the garden and spent five
						
						minutes over the man, trying to discover whether he had killed him
						
						or not. And the prosecutor refuses to believe the prisoner's statement
						
						that he ran to old Grigory out of pity. 'No,' he says, 'such
						
						sensibility is impossible at such a moment, that's unnatural; he ran
						
						to find out whether the only witness of his crime was dead or alive,
						
						and so showed that he had committed the murder, since he would not
						
						have run back for any other reason.'</p><p id="x_2-p11">    "Here you have psychology; but let us take the same method and
						
						apply it to the case the other way round, and our result will be no
						
						less probable. The murderer, we are told, leapt down to find out, as a
						
						precaution, whether the witness was alive or not, yet he had left in
						
						his murdered father's study, as the prosecutor himself argues, an
						
						amazing piece of evidence in the shape of a torn envelope, with an
						
						inscription that there had been three thousand roubles in it. 'If he
						
						had carried that envelope away with him, no one in the world would
						
						have known of that envelope and of the notes in it, and that the money
						
						had been stolen by the prisoner.' Those are the prosecutor's own
						
						words. So on one side you see a complete absence of precaution, a
						
						man who has lost his head and run away in a fright, leaving that
						
						clue on the floor, and two minutes later, when he has killed another
						
						man, we are entitled to assume the most heartless and calculating
						
						foresight in him. But even admitting this was so, it is
						
						psychological subtlety, I suppose, that discerns that under certain
						
						circumstances I become as bloodthirsty and keen-sighted as a Caucasian
						
						eagle, while at the next I am as timid and blind as a mole. But if I
						
						am so bloodthirsty and cruelly calculating that when I kill a man I
						
						only run back to find out whether he is alive to witness against me,
						
						why should I spend five minutes looking after my victim at the risk of
						
						encountering other witnesses? Why soak my handkerchief, wiping the
						
						blood off his head so that it may be evidence against me later? If
						
						he were so cold-hearted and calculating, why not hit the servant on
						
						the head again and again with the same pestle so as to kill him
						
						outright and relieve himself of all anxiety about the witness?</p><p id="x_2-p12">    "Again, though he ran to see whether the witness was alive, he
						
						left another witness on the path, that brass pestle which he had taken
						
						from the two women, and which they could always recognise afterwards
						
						as theirs, and prove that he had taken it from them. And it is not
						
						as though he had forgotten it on the path, dropped it through
						
						carelessness or haste, no, he had flung away his weapon, for it was
						
						found fifteen paces from where Grigory lay. Why did he do so? just
						
						because he was grieved at having killed a man, an old servant; and
						
						he flung away the pestle with a curse, as a murderous weapon. That's
						
						how it must have been, what other reason could he have had for
						
						throwing it so far? And if he was capable of feeling grief and pity at
						
						having killed a man, it shows that he was innocent of his father's
						
						murder. Had he murdered him, he would never have run to another victim
						
						out of pity; then he would have felt differently; his thoughts would
						
						have been centred on self-preservation. He would have had none to
						
						spare for pity, that is beyond doubt. On the contrary, he would have
						
						broken his skull instead of spending five minutes looking after him.</p><p id="x_2-p13">There was room for pity and good-feeling just because his conscience
						
						had been clear till then. Here we have a different psychology. I
						
						have purposely resorted to this method, gentlemen of the jury, to show
						
						that you can prove anything by it. It all depends on who makes use
						
						of it. Psychology lures even most serious people into romancing, and
						
						quite unconsciously. I am speaking of the abuse of psychology,
						
						gentlemen."</p><p id="x_2-p14">    Sounds of approval and laughter, at the expense of the prosecutor,
						
						were again audible in the court. I will not repeat the speech in
						
						detail; I will only quote some passages from it, some leading points.</p>					
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 11 - There Was No Money. There Was No Robbery" prev="x_2" next="xii" id="xi_1">
					


							<p id="xi_1-p1">THERE was one point that struck everyone in Fetyukovitch's speech.</p><p id="xi_1-p2">He flatly denied the existence of the fatal three thousand roubles,
						
						and consequently, the possibility of their having been stolen.</p><p id="xi_1-p3">    "Gentlemen of the jury," he began. "Every new and unprejudiced
						
						observer must be struck by a characteristic peculiarity in the present
						
						case, namely, the charge of robbery, and the complete impossibility of
						
						proving that there was anything to be stolen. We are told that money
						
						was stolen- three thousand roubles but whether those roubles ever
						
						existed, nobody knows. Consider, how have we heard of that sum, and
						
						who has seen the notes? The only person who saw them, and stated
						
						that they had been put in the envelope, was the servant, Smerdyakov.</p><p id="xi_1-p4">He had spoken of it to the prisoner and his brother, Ivan
						
						Fyodorovitch, before the catastrophe. Madame Svyetlov, too, had been
						
						told of it. But not one of these three persons had actually seen the
						
						notes, no one but Smerdyakov had seen them.</p><p id="xi_1-p5">    "Here the question arises, if it's true that they did exist, and
						
						that Smerdyakov had seen them, when did he see them for the last time?</p><p id="xi_1-p6">What if his master had taken the notes from under his bed and put them
						
						back in his cash-box without telling him? Note, that according to
						
						Smerdyakov's story the notes were kept under the mattress; the
						
						prisoner must have pulled them out, and yet the bed was absolutely
						
						unrumpled; that is carefully recorded in the protocol. How could the
						
						prisoner have found the notes without disturbing the bed? How could he
						
						have helped soiling with his blood-stained hands the fine and spotless
						
						linen with which the bed had been purposely made?</p><p id="xi_1-p7">    "But I shall be asked: What about the envelope on the floor?</p><p id="xi_1-p8">Yes, it's worth saying a word or two about that envelope. I was
						
						somewhat surprised just now to hear the highly talented prosecutor
						
						declare of himself- of himself, observe- that but for that envelope,
						
						but for its being left on the floor, no one in the world would have
						
						known of the existence of that envelope and the notes in it, and
						
						therefore of the prisoner's having stolen it. And so that torn scrap
						
						of paper is, by the prosecutor's own admission, the sole proof on
						
						which the charge of robbery rests, 'otherwise no one would have
						
						known of the robbery, nor perhaps even of the money.' But is the
						
						mere fact that that scrap of paper was lying on the floor a proof that
						
						there was money in it, and that that money had been stolen? Yet, it
						
						will be objected, Smerdyakov had seen the money in the envelope. But
						
						when, when had he seen it for the last time, I ask you that? I
						
						talked to Smerdyakov, and he told me that he had seen the notes two
						
						days before the catastrophe. Then why not imagine that old Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch, locked up alone in impatient and hysterical expectation of
						
						the object of his adoration, may have whiled away the time by breaking
						
						open the envelope and taking out the notes. 'What's the use of the
						
						envelope?' he may have asked himself. 'She won't believe the notes are
						
						there, but when I show her the thirty rainbow-coloured notes in one
						
						roll, it will make more impression, you may be sure, it will make
						
						her mouth water.' And so he tears open the envelope, takes out the
						
						money, and flings the envelope on the floor, conscious of being the
						
						owner and untroubled by any fears of leaving evidence.</p><p id="xi_1-p9">    "Listen, gentlemen, could anything be more likely than this theory
						
						and such an action? Why is it out of the question? But if anything
						
						of the sort could have taken place, the charge of robbery falls to the
						
						ground; if there was no money, there was no theft of it. If the
						
						envelope on the floor may be taken as evidence that there had been
						
						money in it, why may I not maintain the opposite, that the envelope
						
						was on the floor because the money had been taken from it by its
						
						owner?</p><p id="xi_1-p10">    "But I shall be asked what became of the money if Fyodor
						
						Pavlovitch took it out of the envelope since it was not found when the
						
						police searched the house? In the first place, part of the money was
						
						found in the cash-box, and secondly, he might have taken it out that
						
						morning or the evening before to make some other use of it, to give or
						
						send it away; he may have changed his idea, his plan of action
						
						completely, without thinking it necessary to announce the fact to
						
						Smerdyakov beforehand. And if there is the barest possibility of
						
						such an explanation, how can the prisoner be so positively accused
						
						of having committed murder for the sake of robbery, and of having
						
						actually carried out that robbery? This is encroaching on the domain
						
						of romance. If it is maintained that something has been stolen, the
						
						thing must be produced, or at least its existence must be proved
						
						beyond doubt. Yet no one had ever seen these notes.</p><p id="xi_1-p11">    "Not long ago in Petersburg a young man of eighteen, hardly more
						
						than a boy, who carried on a small business as a costermonger, went in
						
						broad daylight into a moneychanger's shop with an axe, and with
						
						extraordinary, typical audacity killed the master of the shop and
						
						carried off fifteen hundred roubles. Five hours later he was arrested,
						
						and, except fifteen roubles he had already managed to spend, the whole
						
						sum was found on him. Moreover, the shopman, on his return to the shop
						
						after the murder, informed the police not only of the exact sum
						
						stolen, but even of the notes and gold coins of which that sum was
						
						made up, and those very notes and coins were found on the criminal.</p><p id="xi_1-p12">This was followed by a full and genuine confession on the part of
						
						the murderer. That's what I call evidence, gentlemen of the jury! In
						
						that case I know, I see, I touch the money, and cannot deny its
						
						existence. Is it the same in the present case? And yet it is a
						
						question of life and death.</p><p id="xi_1-p13">    "Yes, I shall be told, but he was carousing that night,
						
						squandering money; he was shown to have had fifteen hundred roubles-
						
						where did he get the money? But the very fact that only fifteen
						
						hundred could be found, and the other half of the sum could nowhere be
						
						discovered, shows that that money was not the same, and had never been
						
						in any envelope. By strict calculation of time it was proved at the
						
						preliminary inquiry that the prisoner ran straight from those women
						
						servants to Perhotin's without going home, and that he had been
						
						nowhere. So he had been all the time in company and therefore could
						
						not have divided the three thousand in half and hidden half in the
						
						town. It's just this consideration that has led the prosecutor to
						
						assume that the money is hidden in some crevice at Mokroe. Why not
						
						in the dungeons of the castle of Udolpho, gentlemen? Isn't this
						
						supposition really too fantastic and too romantic? And observe, if
						
						that supposition breaks down, the whole charge of robbery is scattered
						
						to the winds, for in that case what could have become of the other
						
						fifteen hundred roubles? By what miracle could they have
						
						disappeared, since it's proved the prisoner went nowhere else? And
						
						we are ready to ruin a man's life with such tales!</p><p id="xi_1-p14">    "I shall be told that he could not explain where he got the
						
						fifteen hundred that he had. and everyone knew that he was without
						
						money before that night. Who knew it, pray? The prisoner has made a
						
						clear and unflinching statement of the source of that money, and if
						
						you will have it so, gentlemen of the jury, nothing can be more
						
						probable than that statement, and more consistent with the temper
						
						and spirit of the prisoner. The prosecutor is charmed with his own
						
						romance. A man of weak will, who had brought himself to take the three
						
						thousand so insultingly offered by his betrothed, could not, we are
						
						told, have set aside half and sewn it up, but would, even if he had
						
						done so, have unpicked it every two days and taken out a hundred,
						
						and so would have spent it all in a month. All this, you will
						
						remember, was put forward in a tone what brooked no contradiction. But
						
						what if the thing happened quite differently? What if you've been
						
						weaving a romance, and about quite a different kind of man? That's
						
						just it, you have invented quite a different man!</p><p id="xi_1-p15">    "I shall be told, perhaps, there are witnesses that he spent on
						
						one day all that three thousand given him by his betrothed a month
						
						before the catastrophe, so he could not have divided the sum in
						
						half. But who are these witnesses? The value of their evidence has
						
						been shown in court already. Besides, in another man's hand a crust
						
						always seems larger, and no one of these witnesses counted that money;
						
						they all judged simply at sight. And the witness Maximov has testified
						
						that the prisoner had twenty thousand in his hand. You see,
						
						gentlemen of the jury, psychology is a two edged weapon. Let me turn
						
						the other edge now and see what comes of it.</p><p id="xi_1-p16">    "A month before the catastrophe the prisoner was entrusted by
						
						Katerina Ivanovna with three thousand roubles to send off by post. But
						
						the question is: is it true that they were entrusted to him in such an
						
						insulting and degrading way as was proclaimed just now? The first
						
						statement made by the young lady on the subject was different,
						
						perfectly different. In the second statement we heard only cries of
						
						resentment and revenge, cries of long-concealed hatred. And the very
						
						fact that the witness gave her first evidence incorrectly gives us a
						
						right to conclude that her second piece of evidence may have been
						
						incorrect also. The prosecutor will not, dare not (his own words)
						
						touch on that story. So be it. I will not touch on it either, but will
						
						only venture to observe that if a lofty and high-principled person,
						
						such as that highly respected young lady unquestionably is, if such
						
						a person, I say, allows herself suddenly in court to contradict her
						
						first statement, with the obvious motive of ruining the prisoner, it
						
						is clear that this evidence has been given not impartially, not
						
						coolly. Have not we the right to assume that a revengeful woman
						
						might have exaggerated much? Yes, she may well have exaggerated, in
						
						particular, the insult and humiliation of her offering him the
						
						money. No, it was offered in such a way that it was possible to take
						
						it, especially for a man so easygoing as the prisoner, above all, as
						
						he expected to receive shortly from his father the three thousand
						
						roubles that he reckoned was owing to him. It was unreflecting of him,
						
						but it was just his irresponsible want of reflection that made him
						
						so confident that his father would give him the money, that he would
						
						get it, and so could always dispatch the money entrusted to him and
						
						repay the debt.</p><p id="xi_1-p17">    "But the prosecutor refuses to allow that he could the same day
						
						have set aside half the money and sewn it up in a little bag. That's
						
						not his character, he tells us, he couldn't have had such feelings.</p><p id="xi_1-p18">But yet he talked himself of the broad Karamazov nature; he cried
						
						out about the two extremes which a Karamazov can contemplate at
						
						once. Karamazov is just such a two-sided nature, fluctuating between
						
						two extremes, that even when moved by the most violent craving for
						
						riotous gaiety, he can pull himself up, if something strikes him on
						
						the other side. And on the other side is love that new love which
						
						had flamed up in his heart, and for that love he needed money; oh, far
						
						more than for carousing with his mistress. If she were to say to
						
						him, 'I am yours, I won't have Fyodor Pavlovitch,' then he must have
						
						money to take her away. That was more important than carousing.</p><p id="xi_1-p19">Could a Karamazov fail to understand it? That anxiety was just what he
						
						was suffering from- what is there improbable in his laying aside
						
						that money and concealing it in case of emergency?</p><p id="xi_1-p20">    "But time passed, and Fyodor Pavlovitch did not give the
						
						prisoner the expected three thousand; on the contrary, the latter
						
						heard that he meant to use this sum to seduce the woman he, the
						
						prisoner, loved. 'If Fyodor Pavlovitch doesn't give the money,' he
						
						thought, 'I shall be put in the position of a thief before Katerina
						
						Ivanovna.' And then the idea presented itself to him that he would
						
						go to Katerina Ivanovna, lay before her the fifteen hundred roubles he
						
						still carried round his neck, and say, 'I am a scoundrel, but not a
						
						thief.' So here we have already a twofold reason why he should guard
						
						that sum of money as the apple of his eye, why he shouldn't unpick the
						
						little bag, and spend it a hundred at a time. Why should you deny
						
						the prisoner a sense of honour? Yes, he has a sense of honour, granted
						
						that it's misplaced, granted it's often mistaken, yet it exists and
						
						amounts to a passion, and he has proved that.</p><p id="xi_1-p21">    "But now the affair becomes even more complex; his jealous
						
						torments reach a climax, and those same two questions torture his
						
						fevered brain more and more: 'If I repay Katerina Ivanovna, where
						
						can I find the means to go off with Grushenka?' If he behaved
						
						wildly, drank, and made disturbances in the taverns in the course of
						
						that month, it was perhaps because he was wretched and strained beyond
						
						his powers of endurance. These two questions became so acute that they
						
						drove him at last to despair. He sent his younger brother to beg for
						
						the last time for the three thousand roubles, but without waiting
						
						for a reply, burst in himself and ended by beating the old man in
						
						the presence of witnesses. After that he had no prospect of getting it
						
						from anyone; his father would not give it him after that beating.</p><p id="xi_1-p22">    "The same evening he struck himself on the breast, just on the
						
						upper part of the breast where the little bag was, and swore to his
						
						brother that he had the means of not being a scoundrel, but that still
						
						he would remain a scoundrel, for he foresaw that he would not use that
						
						means, that he wouldn't have the character, that he wouldn't have
						
						the will-power to do it. Why, why does the prosecutor refuse to
						
						believe the evidence of Alexey Karamazov, given so genuinely and
						
						sincerely, so spontaneously and convincingly? And why, on the
						
						contrary, does he force me to believe in money hidden in a crevice, in
						
						the dungeons of the castle of Udolpho?</p><p id="xi_1-p23">    "The same evening, after his talk with his brother, the prisoner
						
						wrote that fatal letter, and that letter is the chief, the most
						
						stupendous proof of the prisoner having committed robbery! 'I shall
						
						beg from everyone, and if I don't get it I shall murder my father
						
						and shall take the envelope with the pink ribbon on it from under
						
						his mattress as soon as Ivan has gone.' A full programme of the
						
						murder, we are told, so it must have been he. 'It has all been done as
						
						he wrote,' cries the prosecutor.</p><p id="xi_1-p24">    "But in the first place, it's the letter of a drunken man and
						
						written in great irritation; secondly, he writes of the envelope
						
						from what he has heard from Smerdyakov again, for he has not seen
						
						the envelope himself; and thirdly, he wrote it indeed, but how can you
						
						prove that he did it? Did the prisoner take the envelope from under
						
						the pillow, did he find the money, did that money exist indeed? And
						
						was it to get money that the prisoner ran off, if you remember? He ran
						
						off post-haste not to steal, but to find out where she was, the
						
						woman who had crushed him. He was not running to carry out a
						
						programme, to carry out what he had written, that is, not for an act
						
						of premeditated robbery, but he ran suddenly, spontaneously, in a
						
						jealous fury. Yes! I shall be told, but when he got there and murdered
						
						him he seized the money, too. But did he murder him after all? The
						
						charge of robbery I repudiate with indignation. A man cannot be
						
						accused of robbery, if it's impossible to state accurately what he has
						
						stolen; that's an axiom. But did he murder him without robbery, did he
						
						murder him at all? Is that proved? Isn't that, too, a romance?"</p>
					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 12 - And There Was No Murder Either" prev="xi_1" next="xiii" id="xii">
					


							<p id="xii-p1">"ALLOW me, gentlemen of the jury, to remind you that a man's
						
						life is at stake and that you must be careful. We have heard the
						
						prosecutor himself admit that until to-day he hesitated to accuse
						
						the prisoner of a full and conscious premeditation of the crime; he
						
						hesitated till he saw that fatal drunken letter which was produced
						
						in court to-day. 'All was done as written.' But, I repeat again, he
						
						was running to her, to seek her, solely to find out where she was.</p><p id="xii-p2">That's a fact that can't be disputed. Had she been at home, he would
						
						not have run away, but would have remained at her side, and so would
						
						not have done what he promised in the letter. He ran unexpectedly
						
						and accidentally, and by that time very likely he did not even
						
						remember his drunken letter. 'He snatched up the pestle,' they say,
						
						and you will remember how a whole edifice of psychology was built on
						
						that pestle- why he was bound to look at that pestle as a weapon, to
						
						snatch it up, and so on, and so on. A very commonplace idea occurs
						
						to me at this point: What if that pestle had not been in sight, had
						
						not been lying on the shelf from which it was snatched by the
						
						prisoner, but had been put away in a cupboard? It would not have
						
						caught the prisoner's eye, and he would have run away without a
						
						weapon, with empty hands, and then he would certainly not have
						
						killed anyone. How then can I look upon the pestle as a proof of
						
						premeditation?</p><p id="xii-p3">    "Yes, but he talked in the taverns of murdering his father, and
						
						two days before, on the evening when he wrote his drunken letter, he
						
						was quiet and only quarrelled with a shopman in the tavern, because
						
						a Karamazov could not help quarrelling, forsooth! But my answer to
						
						that is, that, if he was planning such a murder in accordance with his
						
						letter, he certainly would not have quarrelled even with a shopman,
						
						and probably would not have gone into the tavern at all, because a
						
						person plotting such a crime seeks quiet and retirement, seeks to
						
						efface himself, to avoid being seen and heard, and that not from
						
						calculation, but from instinct. Gentlemen of the jury, the
						
						psychological method is a two-edged weapon, and we, too, can use it.</p><p id="xii-p4">As for all this shouting in taverns throughout the month, don't we
						
						often hear children, or drunkards coming out of taverns shout, 'I'll
						
						kill you'? but they don't murder anyone. And that fatal letter-
						
						isn't that simply drunken irritability, too? Isn't that simply the
						
						shout of the brawler outside the tavern, 'I'll kill you! I'll kill the
						
						lot of you!' Why not, why could it not be that? What reason have we to
						
						call that letter 'fatal' rather than absurd? Because his father has
						
						been found murdered, because a witness saw the prisoner running out of
						
						the garden with a weapon in his hand, and was knocked down by him:
						
						therefore, we are told, everything was done as he had planned in
						
						writing, and the letter was not 'absurd,' but 'fatal.'
						
							</p><p id="xii-p5">"Now, thank God! we've come to the real point: 'since he was in
						
						the garden, he must have murdered him.' In those few words: 'since
						
						he was, then he must' lies the whole case for the prosecution. He
						
						was there, so he must have. And what if there is no must about it,
						
						even if he was there? Oh, I admit that the chain of evidence- the
						
						coincidences- are really suggestive. But examine all these facts
						
						separately, regardless of their connection. Why, for instance, does
						
						the prosecution refuse to admit the truth of the prisoner's
						
						statement that he ran away from his father's window? Remember the
						
						sarcasms in which the prosecutor indulged at the expense of the
						
						respectful and 'pious' sentiments which suddenly came over the
						
						murderer. But what if there were something of the sort, a feeling of
						
						religious awe, if not of filial respect? 'My mother must have been
						
						praying for me at that moment,' were the prisoner's words at the
						
						preliminary inquiry, and so he ran away as soon as he convinced
						
						himself that Madame Svyetlov was not in his father's house. 'But he
						
						could not convince himself by looking through the window,' the
						
						prosecutor objects. But why couldn't he? Why? The window opened at the
						
						signals given by the prisoner. Some word might have been uttered by
						
						Fyodor Pavlovitch, some exclamation which showed the prisoner that she
						
						was not there. Why should we assume everything as we imagine it, as we
						
						make up our minds to imagine it? A thousand things may happen in
						
						reality which elude the subtlest imagination.</p><p id="xii-p6">    "'Yes, but Grigory saw the door open and so the prisoner certainly
						
						was in the house, therefore he killed him.' Now about that door,
						
						gentlemen of the jury.... Observe that we have only the statement of
						
						one witness as to that door, and he was at the time in such a
						
						condition, that- but supposing the door was open; supposing the
						
						prisoner has lied in denying it, from an instinct of self-defence,
						
						natural in his position; supposing he did go into the house- well,
						
						what then? How does it follow that because he was there he committed
						
						the murder? He might have dashed in, run through the rooms; might have
						
						pushed his father away; might have struck him; but as soon as he had
						
						made sure Madame Svyetlov was not there, he may have run away
						
						rejoicing that she was not there and that he had not killed his
						
						father. And it was perhaps just because he had escaped from the
						
						temptation to kill his father, because he had a clear conscience and
						
						was rejoicing at not having killed him, that he was capable of a
						
						pure feeling, the feeling of pity and compassion, and leapt off the
						
						fence a minute later to the assistance of Grigory after he had, in his
						
						excitement, knocked him down.</p><p id="xii-p7">    "With terrible eloquence the prosecutor has described to us the
						
						dreadful state of the prisoner's mind at Mokroe when love again lay
						
						before him calling him to new life, while love was impossible for
						
						him because he had his father's bloodstained corpse behind him and
						
						beyond that corpse- retribution. And yet the prosecutor allowed him
						
						love, which he explained, according to his method, talking about
						
						this drunken condition, about a criminal being taken to execution,
						
						about it being still far off, and so on and so on. But again I ask,
						
						Mr. Prosecutor, have you not invented a new personality? Is the
						
						prisoner so coarse and heartless as to be able to think at that moment
						
						of love and of dodges to escape punishment, if his hands were really
						
						stained with his father's blood? No, no, no! As soon as it was made
						
						plain to him that she loved him and called him to her side,
						
						promising him new happiness, oh! then, I protest he must have felt the
						
						impulse to suicide doubled, trebled, and must have killed himself,
						
						if he had his father's murder on his conscience. Oh, no! he would
						
						not have forgotten where his pistols lay! I know the prisoner: the
						
						savage, stony heartlessness ascribed to him by the prosecutor is
						
						inconsistent with his character. He would have killed himself,
						
						that's certain. He did not kill himself just because 'his mother's
						
						prayers had saved him,' and he was innocent of his father's blood.</p><p id="xii-p8">He was troubled, he was grieving that night at Mokroe only about old
						
						Grigory and praying to God that the old man would recover, that his
						
						blow had not been fatal, and that he would not have to suffer for
						
						it. Why not accept such an interpretation of the facts? What
						
						trustworthy proof have we that the prisoner is lying?</p><p id="xii-p9">    "But we shall be told at once again, 'There is his father's
						
						corpse! If he ran away without murdering him, who did murder him?'
						
						Here, I repeat, you have the whole logic of the prosecution. Who
						
						murdered him, if not he? There's no one to put in his place.</p><p id="xii-p10">    "Gentlemen of the jury, is that really so? Is it positively,
						
						actually true that there is no one else at all? We've heard the
						
						prosecutor count on his fingers all the persons who were in that house
						
						that night. They were five in number; three of them, I agree, could
						
						not have been responsible- the murdered man himself, old Grigory,
						
						and his wife. There are left then the prisoner and Smerdyakov, and the
						
						prosecutor dramatically exclaims that the prisoner pointed to
						
						Smerdyakov because he had no one else to fix on, that had there been a
						
						sixth person, even a phantom of a sixth person, he would have
						
						abandoned the charge against Smerdyakov at once in shame and have
						
						accused that other. But, gentlemen of the jury, why may I not draw the
						
						very opposite conclusion? There are two persons- the prisoner and
						
						Smerdyakov. Why can I not say that you accuse my client, simply
						
						because you have no one else to accuse? And you have no one else
						
						only because you have determined to exclude Smerdyakov from all
						
						suspicion.</p><p id="xii-p11">    "It's true, indeed, Smerdyakov is accused only by the prisoner,
						
						his two brothers, and Madame Svyetlov. But there are others who accuse
						
						him: there are vague rumours of a question, of a suspicion, an obscure
						
						report, a feeling of expectation. Finally, we have the evidence of a
						
						combination of facts very suggestive, though, I admit, inconclusive.</p><p id="xii-p12">In the first place we have precisely on the day of the catastrophe
						
						that fit, for the genuineness of which the prosecutor, for some
						
						reason, has felt obliged to make a careful defence. Then
						
						Smerdyakov's sudden suicide on the eve of the trial. Then the
						
						equally startling evidence given in court to-day by the elder of the
						
						prisoner's brothers, who had believed in his guilt, but has to-day
						
						produced a bundle of notes and proclaimed Smerdyakov as the
						
						murderer. Oh, I fully share the court's and the prosecutor's
						
						conviction that Ivan Karamazov is suffering from brain fever, that his
						
						statement may really be a desperate effort, planned in delirium, to
						
						save his brother by throwing the guilt on the dead man. But again
						
						Smerdyakov's name is pronounced, again there is a suggestion of
						
						mystery. There is something unexplained, incomplete. And perhaps it
						
						may one day be explained. But we won't go into that now. Of that
						
						later.</p><p id="xii-p13">    "The court has resolved to go on with the trial, but, meantime,
						
						I might make a few remarks about the character-sketch of Smerdyakov
						
						drawn with subtlety and talent by the prosecutor. But while I admire
						
						his talent I cannot agree with him. I have visited Smerdyakov, I
						
						have seen him and talked to him, and he made a very different
						
						impression on me. He was weak in health, it is true; but in character,
						
						in spirit, he was by no means the weak man the prosecutor has made him
						
						out to be. I found in him no trace of the timidity on which the
						
						prosecutor so insisted. There was no simplicity about him, either. I
						
						found in him, on the contrary, an extreme mistrustfulness concealed
						
						under a mask of naivete, and an intelligence of considerable range.</p><p id="xii-p14">The prosecutor was too simple in taking him for weak-minded. He made a
						
						very definite impression on me: I left him with the conviction that he
						
						was a distinctly spiteful creature, excessively ambitious, vindictive,
						
						and intensely envious. I made some inquiries: he resented his
						
						parentage, was ashamed of it, and would clench his teeth when he
						
						remembered that he was the son of 'stinking Lizaveta.' He was
						
						disrespectful to the servant Grigory and his wife, who had cared for
						
						him in his childhood. He cursed and jeered at Russia. He dreamed of
						
						going to France and becoming a Frenchman. He used often to say that he
						
						hadn't the means to do so. I fancy he loved no one but himself and had
						
						a strangely high opinion of himself. His conception of culture was
						
						limited to good clothes, clean shirt-fronts and polished boots.</p><p id="xii-p15">Believing himself to be the illegitimate son of Fyodor Pavlovitch
						
						(there is evidence of this), he might well have resented his position,
						
						compared with that of his master's legitimate sons. They had
						
						everything, he nothing. They had all the rights, they had the
						
						inheritance, while he was only the cook. He told me himself that he
						
						had helped Fyodor Pavlovitch to put the notes in the envelope. The
						
						destination of that sum- a sum which would have made his career-
						
						must have been hateful to him. Moreover, he saw three thousand roubles
						
						in new rainbow-coloured notes. (I asked him about that on purpose.)
						
						Oh, beware of showing an ambitious and envious man a large sum of
						
						money at once! And it was the first time he had seen so much money
						
						in the hands of one man. The sight of the rainbow-coloured notes may
						
						have made a morbid impression on his imagination, but with no
						
						immediate results.</p><p id="xii-p16">    "The talented prosecutor, with extraordinary subtlety, sketched
						
						for us all the arguments for and against the hypothesis of
						
						Smerdyakov's guilt, and asked us in particular what motive he had in
						
						feigning a fit. But he may not have been feigning at all, the fit
						
						may have happened quite naturally, but it may have passed off quite
						
						naturally, and the sick man may have recovered, not completely
						
						perhaps, but still regaining consciousness, as happens with
						
						epileptics.</p><p id="xii-p17">    "The prosecutor asks at what moment could Smerdyakov have
						
						committed the murder. But it is very easy to point out that moment. He
						
						might have waked up from deep sleep (for he was only asleep- an
						
						epileptic fit is always followed by a deep sleep) at that moment
						
						when the old Grigory shouted at the top of his voice 'Parricide!' That
						
						shout in the dark and stillness may have waked Smerdyakov whose
						
						sleep may have been less sound at the moment: he might naturally
						
						have waked up an hour before.</p><p id="xii-p18">    "Getting out of bed, he goes almost unconsciously and with no
						
						definite motive towards the sound to see what's the matter. His head
						
						is still clouded with his attack, his faculties are half asleep;
						
						but, once in the garden, he walks to the lighted windows and he
						
						hears terrible news from his master, who would be, of course, glad
						
						to see him. His mind sets to work at once. He hears all the details
						
						from his frightened master, and gradually in his disordered brain
						
						there shapes itself an idea- terrible, but seductive and
						
						irresistibly logical. To kill the old man, take the three thousand,
						
						and throw all the blame on to his young master. A terrible lust of
						
						money, of booty, might seize upon him as he realised his security from
						
						detection. Oh! these sudden and irresistible impulses come so often
						
						when there is a favourable opportunity, and especially with
						
						murderers who have had no idea of committing a murder beforehand.</p><p id="xii-p19">And Smerdyakov may have gone in and carried out his plan. With what
						
						weapon? Why, with any stone picked up in the garden. But what for,
						
						with what object? Why, the three thousand which means a career for
						
						him. Oh, I am not contradicting myself- the money may have existed.</p><p id="xii-p20">And perhaps Smerdyakov alone knew where to find it, where his master
						
						kept it. And the covering of the money- the torn envelope on the
						
						floor?</p><p id="xii-p21">    "Just now, when the prosecutor was explaining his subtle theory
						
						that only an inexperienced thief like Karamazov would have left the
						
						envelope on the floor, and not one like Smerdyakov, who would have
						
						avoided leaving a piece of evidence against himself, I thought as I
						
						listened that I was hearing something very familiar, and, would you
						
						believe it, I have heard that very argument, that very conjecture,
						
						of how Karamazov would have behaved, precisely two days before, from
						
						Smerdyakov himself. What's more, it struck me at the time. I fancied
						
						that there was an artificial simplicity about him; that he was in a
						
						hurry to suggest this idea to me that I might fancy it was my own.</p><p id="xii-p22">He insinuated it, as it were. Did he not insinuate the same idea at
						
						the inquiry and suggest it to the talented prosecutor?</p><p id="xii-p23">    "I shall be asked, 'What about the old woman, Grigory's wife?</p><p id="xii-p24">She heard the sick man moaning close by, all night.' Yes, she heard
						
						it, but that evidence is extremely unreliable. I knew a lady who
						
						complained bitterly that she had been kept awake all night by a dog in
						
						the yard. Yet the poor beast, it appeared, had only yelped once or
						
						twice in the night. And that's natural. If anyone is asleep and
						
						hears a groan he wakes up, annoyed at being waked, but instantly falls
						
						asleep again. Two hours later, again a groan, he wakes up and falls
						
						asleep again; and the same thing again two hours later- three times
						
						altogether in the night. Next morning the sleeper wakes up and
						
						complains that someone has been groaning all night and keeping him
						
						awake. And it is bound to seem so to him: the intervals of two hours
						
						of sleep he does not remember, he only remembers the moments of
						
						waking, so he feels he has been waked up all night.</p><p id="xii-p25">    "But why, why, asks the prosecutor, did not Smerdyakov confess
						
						in his last letter? Why did his conscience prompt him to one step
						
						and not to both? But, excuse me, conscience implies penitence, and the
						
						suicide may not have felt penitence, but only despair. Despair and
						
						penitence are two very different things. Despair may be vindictive and
						
						irreconcilable, and the suicide, laying his hands on himself, may well
						
						have felt redoubled hatred for those whom he had envied all his life.</p><p id="xii-p26">    "Gentlemen of the jury, beware of a miscarriage of justice! What
						
						is there unlikely in all I have put before you just now? Find the
						
						error in my reasoning; find the impossibility, the absurdity. And if
						
						there is but a shade of possibility, but a shade of probability in
						
						my propositions, do not condemn him. And is there only a shade? I
						
						swear by all that is sacred, I fully believe in the explanation of the
						
						murder I have just put forward. What troubles me and makes me
						
						indignant is that of all the mass of facts heaped up by the
						
						prosecution against the prisoner, there is not a single one certain
						
						and irrefutable. And yet the unhappy man is to be ruined by the
						
						accumulation of these facts. Yes, the accumulated effect is awful: the
						
						blood, the blood dripping from his fingers, the bloodstained shirt,
						
						the dark night resounding with the shout 'Parricide!' and the old
						
						man falling with a broken head. And then the mass of phrases,
						
						statements, gestures, shouts! Oh! this has so much influence, it can
						
						so bias the mind; but, gentlemen of the jury, can it bias your
						
						minds? Remember, you have been given absolute power to bind and to
						
						loose, but the greater the power, the more terrible its
						
						responsibility.</p><p id="xii-p27">    "I do not draw back one iota from what I have said just now, but
						
						suppose for one moment I agreed with the prosecution that my
						
						luckless client had stained his hands with his father's blood. This is
						
						only hypothesis, I repeat; I never for one instant doubt of his
						
						innocence. But, so be it, I assume that my client is guilty of
						
						parricide. Even so, hear what I have to say. I have it in my heart
						
						to say something more to you, for I feel that there must be a great
						
						conflict in your hearts and minds.... Forgive my referring to your
						
						hearts and minds, gentlemen of the jury, but I want to be truthful and
						
						sincere to the end. Let us all be sincere!"
						
							</p><p id="xii-p28">At this point the speech was interrupted by rather loud
						
						applause. The last words, indeed, were pronounced with a note of
						
						such sincerity that everyone felt that he really might have
						
						something to say, and that what he was about to say would be of the
						
						greatest consequence. But the President, hearing the applause, in a
						
						loud voice threatened to clear the court if such an incident were
						
						repeated. Every sound was hushed and Fetyukovitch began in a voice
						
						full of feeling quite unlike the tone he had used hitherto.</p>					
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 13 - A Corrupter of Thought" prev="xii" next="xiv" id="xiii">
					

						
							<p id="xiii-p1">"IT'S not only the accumulation of facts that threatens my
						
						client with ruin, gentlemen of the jury," he began, "what is really
						
						damning for my client is one fact- the dead body of his father. Had it
						
						been an ordinary case of murder you would have rejected the charge
						
						in view of the triviality, the incompleteness, and the fantastic
						
						character of the evidence, if you examine each part of it
						
						separately; or, at least, you would have hesitated to ruin a man's
						
						life simply from the prejudice against him which he has, alas! only
						
						too well deserved. But it's not an ordinary case of murder, it's a
						
						case of parricide. That impresses men's minds, and to such a degree
						
						that the very triviality and incompleteness of the evidence becomes
						
						less trivial and less incomplete even to an unprejudiced mind. How can
						
						such a prisoner be acquitted? What if he committed the murder and gets
						
						off unpunished? That is what everyone, almost involuntarily,
						
						instinctively, feels at heart.</p><p id="xiii-p2">    "Yes, it's a fearful thing to shed a father's blood- the father
						
						who has begotten me, loved me, not spared his life for me, grieved
						
						over my illnesses from childhood up, troubled all his life for my
						
						happiness, and has lived in my joys, in my successes. To murder such a
						
						father- that's inconceivable. Gentlemen of the jury, what is a father-
						
						a real father? What is the meaning of that great word? What is the
						
						great idea in that name? We have just indicated in part what a true
						
						father is and what he ought to be. In the case in which we are now
						
						so deeply occupied and over which our hearts are aching- in the
						
						present case, the father, Fyodor Pavlovitch Karamazov, did not
						
						correspond to that conception of a father to which we have just
						
						referred. That's the misfortune. And indeed some fathers are a
						
						misfortune. Let us examine this misfortune rather more closely: we
						
						must shrink from nothing, gentlemen of the jury, considering the
						
						importance of the decision you have to make. It's our particular
						
						duty not to shrink from any idea, like children or frightened women,
						
						as the talented prosecutor happily expresses it.</p><p id="xiii-p3">    "But in the course of his heated speech my esteemed opponent
						
						(and he was my opponent before I opened my lips) exclaimed several
						
						times, 'Oh, I will not yield the defence of the prisoner to the lawyer
						
						who has come down from Petersburg. I accuse, but I defend also!' He
						
						exclaimed that several times, but forgot to mention that if this
						
						terrible prisoner was for twenty-three years so grateful for a mere
						
						pound of nuts given him by the only man who had been kind to him, as a
						
						child in his father's house, might not such a man well have remembered
						
						for twenty-three years how he ran in his father's back-yard, without
						
						boots on his feet and with his little trousers hanging by one button'-
						
						to use the expression of the kindhearted doctor, Herzenstube?</p><p id="xiii-p4">    "Oh, gentlemen of the jury, why need we look more closely at
						
						this misfortune, why repeat what we all know already? What did my
						
						client meet with when he arrived here, at his father's house, and
						
						why depict my client as a heartless egoist and monster? He is
						
						uncontrolled, he is wild and unruly- we are trying him now for that-
						
						but who is responsible for his life? Who is responsible for his having
						
						received such an unseemly bringing up, in spite of his excellent
						
						disposition and his grateful and sensitive heart? Did anyone train him
						
						to be reasonable? Was he enlightened by study? Did anyone love him
						
						ever so little in his childhood? My client was left to the care of
						
						Providence like a beast of the field. He thirsted perhaps to see his
						
						father after long years of separation. A thousand times perhaps he
						
						may, recalling his childhood, have driven away the loathsome
						
						phantoms that haunted his childish dreams and with all his heart he
						
						may have longed to embrace and to forgive his father! And what awaited
						
						him? He was met by cynical taunts, suspicions and wrangling about
						
						money. He heard nothing but revolting talk and vicious precepts
						
						uttered daily over the brandy, and at last he saw his father
						
						seducing his mistress from him with his own money. Oh, gentlemen of
						
						the jury, that was cruel and revolting! And that old man was always
						
						complaining of the disrespect and cruelty of his son. He slandered him
						
						in society, injured him, calumniated him, bought up his unpaid debts
						
						to get him thrown into prison.</p><p id="xiii-p5">    "Gentlemen of the jury, people like my client, who are fierce,
						
						unruly, and uncontrolled on the surface, are sometimes, most
						
						frequently indeed, exceedingly tender-hearted, only they don't express
						
						it. Don't laugh, don't laugh at my idea! The talented prosecutor
						
						laughed mercilessly just now at my client for loving Schiller-
						
						loving the sublime and beautiful! I should not have laughed at that in
						
						his place. Yes, such natures- oh, let me speak in defence of such
						
						natures, so often and so cruelly misunderstood- these natures often
						
						thirst for tenderness, goodness, and justice, as it were, in
						
						contrast to themselves, their unruliness, their ferocity- they
						
						thirst for it unconsciously. Passionate and fierce on the surface,
						
						they are painfully capable of loving woman, for instance, and with a
						
						spiritual and elevated love. Again do not laugh at me, this is very
						
						often the case in such natures. But they cannot hide their passions-
						
						sometimes very coarse- and that is conspicuous and is noticed, but the
						
						inner man is unseen. Their passions are quickly exhausted; but, by the
						
						side of a noble and lofty creature that seemingly coarse and rough man
						
						seeks a new life, seeks to correct himself, to be better, to become
						
						noble and honourable, 'sublime and beautiful,' however much the
						
						expression has been ridiculed.</p><p id="xiii-p6">    "I said just now that I would not venture to touch upon my
						
						client's engagement. But I may say half a word. What we heard just now
						
						was not evidence, but only the scream of a frenzied and revengeful
						
						woman, and it was not for her- oh, not for her!- to reproach him
						
						with treachery, for she has betrayed him! If she had had but a
						
						little time for reflection she would not have given such evidence. Oh,
						
						do not believe her! No, my client is not a monster, as she called him!
						
							</p><p id="xiii-p7"> "The Lover of Mankind on the eve of His Crucifixion said: 'I am
						
						the Good Shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for his sheep,
						
						so that not one of them might be lost.' Let not a man's soul be lost
						
						through us!
						
							</p><p id="xiii-p8"> "I asked just now what does 'father' mean, and exclaimed that it
						
						was a great word, a precious name. But one must use words honestly,
						
						gentlemen, and I venture to call things by their right names: such a
						
						father as old Karamazov cannot be called a father and does not deserve
						
						to be. Filial love for an unworthy father is an absurdity, an
						
						impossibility. Love cannot be created from nothing: only God can
						
						create something from nothing.</p><p id="xiii-p9">    "'Fathers, provoke not your children to wrath,' the apostle
						
						writes, from a heart glowing with love. It's not for the sake of my
						
						client that I quote these sacred words, I mention them for all
						
						fathers. Who has authorised me to preach to fathers? No one. But as
						
						a man and a citizen I make my appeal- vivos voco! We are not long on
						
						earth, we do many evil deeds and say many evil words. So let us all
						
						catch a favourable moment when we are all together to say a good
						
						word to each other. That's what I am doing: while I am in this place I
						
						take advantage of my opportunity. Not for nothing is this tribune
						
						given us by the highest authority- all Russia hears us! I am not
						
						speaking only for the fathers here present, I cry aloud to all
						
						fathers: 'Fathers, provoke not your children to wrath.' Yes, let us
						
						first fulfil Christ's injunction ourselves and only then venture to
						
						expect it of our children. Otherwise we are not fathers, but enemies
						
						of our children, and they are not our children, but our enemies, and
						
						we have made them our enemies ourselves. 'What measure ye mete it
						
						shall be measured unto you again'- it's not I who say that, it's the
						
						Gospel precept, measure to others according as they measure to you.</p><p id="xiii-p10">How can we blame children if they measure us according to our measure?</p><p id="xiii-p11">    "Not long ago a servant girl in Finland was suspected of having
						
						secretly given birth to a child. She was watched, and a box of which
						
						no one knew anything was found in the corner of the loft, behind
						
						some bricks. It was opened and inside was found the body of a new-born
						
						child which she had killed. In the same box were found the skeletons
						
						of two other babies which, according to her own confession, she had
						
						killed at the moment of their birth.</p><p id="xiii-p12">    "Gentlemen of the jury, was she a mother to her children? She gave
						
						birth to them, indeed; but was she a mother to them? Would anyone
						
						venture to give her the sacred name of mother? Let us be bold,
						
						gentlemen, let us be audacious even: it's our duty to be so at this
						
						moment and not to be afraid of certain words and ideas like the Moscow
						
						women in Ostrovsky's play, who are scared at the sound of certain
						
						words. No, let us prove that the progress of the last few years has
						
						touched even us, and let us say plainly, the father is not merely he
						
						who begets the child, but he who begets it and does his duty by it.</p><p id="xiii-p13">    "Oh, of course, there is the other meaning, there is the other
						
						interpretation of the word 'father,' which insists that any father,
						
						even though he be a monster, even though he be the enemy of his
						
						children, still remains my father simply because he begot me. But this
						
						is, so to say, the mystical meaning which I cannot comprehend with
						
						my intellect, but can only accept by faith, or, better to say, on
						
						faith, like many other things which I do not understand, but which
						
						religion bids me believe. But in that case let it be kept outside
						
						the sphere of actual life. In the sphere of actual life, which has,
						
						indeed, its own rights, but also lays upon us great duties and
						
						obligations, in that sphere, if we want to be humane- Christian, in
						
						fact- we must, or ought to, act only upon convictions justified by
						
						reason and experience, which have been passed through the crucible
						
						of analysis; in a word, we must act rationally, and not as though in
						
						dream and delirium, that we may not do harm, that we may not ill-treat
						
						and ruin a man. Then it will be real Christian work, not only
						
						mystic, but rational and philanthropic...."</p><p id="xiii-p14">    There was violent applause at this passage from many parts of
						
						the court, but Fetyukovitch waved his hands as though imploring them
						
						to let him finish without interruption. The court relapsed into
						
						silence at once. The orator went on.</p><p id="xiii-p15">    "Do you suppose, gentlemen, that our children as they grow up
						
						and begin to reason can avoid such questions? No, they cannot, and
						
						we will not impose on them an impossible restriction. The sight of
						
						an unworthy father involuntarily suggests tormenting questions to a
						
						young creature, especially when he compares him with the excellent
						
						fathers of his companions. The conventional answer to this question
						
						is: 'He begot you, and you are his flesh and blood, and therefore
						
						you are bound to love him.' The youth involuntarily reflects: 'But did
						
						he love me when he begot me?' he asks, wondering more and more. 'Was
						
						it for my sake he begot me? He did not know me, not even my sex, at
						
						that moment, at the moment of passion, perhaps, inflamed by wine,
						
						and he has only transmitted to me a propensity to drunkenness-
						
						that's all he's done for me.... Why am I bound to love him simply
						
						for begetting me when he has cared nothing for me all my life after?'
						
							</p><p id="xiii-p16"> "Oh, perhaps those questions strike you as coarse and cruel, but
						
						do not expect an impossible restraint from a young mind. 'Drive nature
						
						out of the door and it will fly in at the window,' and, above all, let
						
						us not be afraid of words, but decide the question according to the
						
						dictates of reason and humanity and not of mystic ideas. How shall
						
						it be decided? Why, like this. Let the son stand before his father and
						
						ask him, 'Father, tell me, why must I love you? Father, show me that I
						
						must love you,' and if that father is able to answer him and show
						
						him good reason, we have a real, normal, parental relation, not
						
						resting on mystical prejudice, but on a rational, responsible and
						
						strictly humanitarian basis. But if he does not, there's an end to the
						
						family tie. He is not a father to him, and the son has a right to look
						
						upon him as a stranger, and even an enemy. Our tribune, gentlemen of
						
						the jury, ought to be a school of true and sound ideas."</p><p id="xiii-p17">    (Here the orator was interrupted by irrepressible and almost
						
						frantic applause. Of course, it was not the whole audience, but a good
						
						half of it applauded. The fathers and mothers present applauded.</p><p id="xiii-p18">Shrieks and exclamations were heard from the gallery, where the ladies
						
						were sitting. Handkerchiefs were waved. The President began ringing
						
						his bell with all his might. He was obviously irritated by the
						
						behaviour of the audience, but did not venture to clear the court as
						
						he had threatened. Even persons of high position, old men with stars
						
						on their breasts, sitting on specially reserved seats behind the
						
						judges, applauded the orator and waved their handkerchiefs. So that
						
						when the noise died down, the President confined himself to
						
						repeating his stern threat to clear the court, and Fetyukovitch,
						
						excited and triumphant, continued his speech.)
						
							</p><p id="xiii-p19"> "Gentlemen of the jury, you remember that awful night of which
						
						so much has been said to-day, when the son got over the fence and
						
						stood face to face with the enemy and persecutor who had begotten him.</p><p id="xiii-p20">I insist most emphatically it was not for money he ran to his father's
						
						house: the charge of robbery is an absurdity, as I proved before.</p><p id="xiii-p21">And it was not to murder him he broke into the house, oh, no! If he
						
						had had that design he would, at least, have taken the precaution of
						
						arming himself beforehand. The brass pestle he caught up instinctively
						
						without knowing why he did it. Granted that he deceived his father
						
						by tapping at the window, granted that he made his way in- I've said
						
						already that I do not for a moment believe that legend, but let it
						
						be so, let us suppose it for a moment. Gentlemen, I swear to you by
						
						all that's holy, if it had not been his father, but an ordinary enemy,
						
						he would, after running through the rooms and satisfying himself
						
						that the woman was not there, have made off, post-haste, without doing
						
						any harm to his rival. He would have struck him, pushed him away
						
						perhaps, nothing more, for he had no thought and no time to spare
						
						for that. What he wanted to know was where she was. But his father,
						
						his father! The mere sight of the father who had hated him from his
						
						childhood, had been his enemy, his persecutor, and now his unnatural
						
						rival, was enough! A feeling of hatred came over him involuntarily,
						
						irresistibly, clouding his reason. It all surged up in one moment!
						
						It was an impulse of madness and insanity, but also an impulse of
						
						nature, irresistibly and unconsciously (like everything in nature)
						
						avenging the violation of its eternal laws.</p><p id="xiii-p22">    "But the prisoner even then did not murder him- I maintain that, I
						
						cry that aloud!- no, he only brandished the pestle in a burst of
						
						indignant disgust, not meaning to kill him, not knowing that he
						
						would kill him. Had he not had this fatal pestle in his hand, he would
						
						have only knocked his father down perhaps, but would not have killed
						
						him. As he ran away, he did not know whether he had killed the old
						
						man. Such a murder is not a murder. Such a murder is not a
						
						parricide. No, the murder of such a father cannot be called parricide.</p><p id="xiii-p23">Such a murder can only be reckoned parricide by prejudice.</p><p id="xiii-p24">    "But I appeal to you again and again from the depths of my soul;
						
						did this murder actually take place? Gentlemen of the jury, if we
						
						convict and punish him, he will say to himself: 'These people have
						
						done nothing for my bringing up, for my education, nothing to
						
						improve my lot, nothing to make me better, nothing to make me a man.</p><p id="xiii-p25">These people have not given me to eat and to drink, have not visited
						
						me in prison and nakedness, and here they have sent me to penal
						
						servitude. I am quits, I owe them nothing now, and owe no one anything
						
						for ever. They are wicked and I will be wicked. They are cruel and I
						
						will be cruel.' That is what he will say, gentlemen of the jury. And I
						
						swear, by finding him guilty you will only make it easier for him: you
						
						will ease his conscience, he will curse the blood he has shed and will
						
						not regret it. At the same time you will destroy in him the
						
						possibility of becoming a new man, for he will remain in his
						
						wickedness and blindness all his life.</p><p id="xiii-p26">    "But do you want to punish him fearfully, terribly, with the
						
						most awful punishment that could be imagined, and at the same time
						
						to save him and regenerate his soul? If so, overwhelm him with your
						
						mercy! You will see, you will hear how he will tremble and be
						
						horror-struck. 'How can I endure this mercy? How can I endure so
						
						much love? Am I worthy of it?' That's what he will exclaim.</p><p id="xiii-p27">    "Oh, I know, I know that heart, that wild but grateful heart,
						
						gentlemen of the jury! It will bow before your mercy; it thirsts for a
						
						great and loving action, it will melt and mount upwards. There are
						
						souls which, in their limitation, blame the whole world. But subdue
						
						such a soul with mercy, show it love, and it will curse its past,
						
						for there are many good impulses in it. Such a heart will expand and
						
						see that God is merciful and that men are good and just. He will be
						
						horror-stricken; he will be crushed by remorse and the vast obligation
						
						laid upon him henceforth. And he will not say then, 'I am quits,'
						
						but will say, 'I am guilty in the sight of all men and am more
						
						unworthy than all.' With tears of penitence and poignant, tender
						
						anguish, he will exclaim: 'Others are better than I, they wanted to
						
						save me, not to ruin me!' Oh, this act of mercy is so easy for you,
						
						for in the absence of anything like real evidence it will be too awful
						
						for you to pronounce: 'Yes, he is guilty.'
						
							</p><p id="xiii-p28"> "Better acquit ten guilty men than punish one innocent man! Do you
						
						hear, do you hear that majestic voice from the past century of our
						
						glorious history? It is not for an insignificant person like me to
						
						remind you that the Russian court does not exist for the punishment
						
						only, but also for the salvation of the criminal! Let other nations
						
						think of retribution and the letter of the law, we will cling to the
						
						spirit and the meaning- the salvation and the reformation of the lost.</p><p id="xiii-p29">If this is true, if Russia and her justice are such, she may go
						
						forward with good cheer! Do not try to scare us with your frenzied
						
						troikas from which all the nations stand aside in disgust. Not a
						
						runaway troika, but the stately chariot of Russia will move calmly and
						
						majestically to its goal. In your hands is the fate of my client, in
						
						your hands is the fate of Russian justice. You will defend it, you
						
						will save it, you will prove that there are men to watch over it, that
						
						it is in good hands!"</p>
					</div4>

<div4 title="Chapter 14 - The Peasants Stand Firm" prev="xiii" next="v_10" id="xiv">
							<p id="xiv-p1">THIS was how Fetyukovitch concluded his speech, and the enthusiasm
						
						of the audience burst like an irresistible storm. It was out of the
						
						question to stop it: the women wept, many of the men wept too, even
						
						two important personages shed tears. The President submitted, and even
						
						postponed ringing his bell. The suppression of such an enthusiasm
						
						would be the suppression of something sacred, as the ladies cried
						
						afterwards. The orator himself was genuinely touched.</p><p id="xiv-p2">    And it was at this moment that Ippolit Kirillovitch got up to make
						
						certain objections. People looked at him with hatred. "What? What's
						
						the meaning of it? He positively dares to make objections," the ladies
						
						babbled. But if the whole world of ladies, including his wife, had
						
						protested he could not have been stopped at that moment. He was
						
						pale, he was shaking with emotion, his first phrases were even
						
						unintelligible, he gasped for breath, could hardly speak clearly, lost
						
						the thread. But he soon recovered himself. Of this new speech of his I
						
						will quote only a few sentences.</p><p id="xiv-p3">    "... I am reproached with having woven a romance. But what is this
						
						defence if not one romance on the top of another? All that was lacking
						
						was poetry. Fyodor Pavlovitch, while waiting for his mistress, tears
						
						open the envelope and throws it on the floor. We are even told what he
						
						said while engaged in this strange act. Is not this a flight of fancy?</p><p id="xiv-p4">And what proof have we that he had taken out the money? Who heard what
						
						he said? The weak-minded idiot, Smerdyakov, transformed into a Byronic
						
						hero, avenging society for his illegitimate birth- isn't this a
						
						romance in the Byronic style? And the son who breaks into his father's
						
						house and murders him without murdering him is not even a romance-
						
						this is a sphinx setting us a riddle which he cannot solve himself. If
						
						he murdered him, he murdered him, and what's the meaning of his
						
						murdering him without having murdered him- who can make head or tail
						
						of this?</p><p id="xiv-p5">    "Then we are admonished that our tribune is a tribune of true
						
						and sound ideas and from this tribune of 'sound ideas' is heard a
						
						solemn declaration that to call the murder of a father 'parricide'</p><p id="xiv-p6">is nothing but a prejudice! But if parricide is a prejudice, and if
						
						every child is to ask his father why he is to love him, what will
						
						become of us? What will become of the foundations of society? What
						
						will become of the family? Parricide, it appears, is only a bogy of
						
						Moscow merchants' wives. The most precious, the most sacred guarantees
						
						for the destiny and future of Russian justice are presented to us in a
						
						perverted and frivolous form, simply to attain an object- to obtain
						
						the justification of something which cannot be justified. 'Oh, crush
						
						him by mercy,' cries the counsel for the defence; but that's all the
						
						criminal wants, and to-morrow it will be seen how much he is
						
						crushed. And is not the counsel for the defence too modest in asking
						
						only for the acquittal of the prisoner? Why not found a charity in the
						
						honour of the parricide to commemorate his exploit among future
						
						generations? Religion and the Gospel are corrected- that's all
						
						mysticism, we are told, and ours is the only true Christianity which
						
						has been subjected to the analysis of reason and common sense. And
						
						so they set up before us a false semblance of Christ! 'What measure ye
						
						mete so it shall be meted unto you again,' cried the counsel for the
						
						defence, and instantly deduces that Christ teaches us to measure as it
						
						is measured to us and this from the tribune of truth and sound
						
						sense! We peep into the Gospel only on the eve of making speeches,
						
						in order to dazzle the audience by our acquaintance with what is,
						
						anyway, a rather original composition, which may be of use to
						
						produce a certain effect- all to serve the purpose! But what Christ
						
						commands us is something very different: He bids us beware of doing
						
						this, because the wicked world does this, but we ought to forgive
						
						and to turn the other cheek, and not to measure to our persecutors
						
						as they measure to us. This is what our God has taught us and not that
						
						to forbid children to murder their fathers is a prejudice. And we will
						
						not from the tribune of truth and good sense correct the Gospel of our
						
						Lord, Whom the counsel for the defence deigns to call only 'the
						
						crucified lover of humanity,' in opposition to all orthodox Russia,
						
						which calls to Him, 'For Thou art our God!'"</p><p id="xiv-p7">    At this the President intervened and checked the over-zealous
						
						speaker, begging him not to exaggerate, not to overstep the bounds,
						
						and so on, as presidents always do in such cases. The audience, too,
						
						was uneasy. The public was restless: there were even exclamations of
						
						indignation. Fetyukovitch did not so much as reply; he only mounted
						
						the tribune to lay his hand on his heart and, with an offended
						
						voice, utter a few words full of dignity. He only touched again,
						
						lightly and ironically, on "romancing" and "psychology," and in an
						
						appropriate place quoted, "Jupiter, you are angry, therefore you are
						
						wrong," which provoked a burst of approving laughter in the
						
						audience, for Ippolit Kirillovitch was by no means like Jupiter. Then,
						
						a propos of the accusation that he was teaching the young generation
						
						to murder their fathers, Fetyukovitch observed, with great dignity,
						
						that he would not even answer. As for the prosecutor's charge of
						
						uttering unorthodox opinions, Fetyukovitch hinted that it was a
						
						personal insinuation and that he had expected in this court to be
						
						secure from accusations "damaging to my reputation as a citizen and
						
						a loyal subject." But at these words the President pulled him up, too,
						
						and Fetyukovitch concluded his speech with a bow, amid a hum of
						
						approbation in the court. And Ippolit Kirillovitch was, in the opinion
						
						of our ladies, "crushed for good."</p><p id="xiv-p8">    Then the prisoner was allowed to speak. Mitya stood up, but said
						
						very little. He was fearfully exhausted, physically and mentally.</p><p id="xiv-p9">The look of strength and independence with which he had entered in the
						
						morning had almost disappeared. He seemed as though he had passed
						
						through an experience that day, which had taught him for the rest of
						
						his life something very important he had not understood till then. His
						
						voice was weak, he did not shout as before. In his words there was a
						
						new note of humility, defeat and submission.</p><p id="xiv-p10">    "What am I to say, gentlemen of the jury? The hour of judgment has
						
						come for me, I feel the hand of God upon me! The end has come to an
						
						erring man! But, before God, I repeat to you, I am innocent of my
						
						father's blood! For the last time I repeat, it wasn't I killed him!</p><p id="xiv-p11">I was erring, but I loved what is good. Every instant I strove to
						
						reform, but I lived like a wild beast. I thank the prosecutor, he told
						
						me many things about myself that I did not know; but it's not true
						
						that I killed my father, the prosecutor is mistaken. I thank my
						
						counsel, too. I cried listening to him; but it's not true that I
						
						killed my father, and he needn't have supposed it. And don't believe
						
						the doctors. I am perfectly sane, only my heart is heavy. If you spare
						
						me, if you let me go, I will pray for you. I will be a better man. I
						
						give you my word before God I will! And if you will condemn me, I'll
						
						break my sword over my head myself and kiss the pieces. But spare
						
						me, do not rob me of my God! I know myself, I shall rebel! My heart is
						
						heavy, gentlemen... spare me!"</p><p id="xiv-p12">    He almost fell back in his place: his voice broke: he could hardly
						
						articulate the last phrase. Then the judges proceeded to put the
						
						questions and began to ask both sides to formulate their
						
						conclusions. But I will not describe the details. At last the jury
						
						rose to retire for consultation. The President was very tired, and
						
						so his last charge to the jury was rather feeble. "Be impartial, don't
						
						be influenced by the eloquence of the defence, but yet weigh the
						
						arguments. Remember that there is a great responsibility laid upon
						
						you," and so on and so on.</p><p id="xiv-p13">    The jury withdrew and the court adjourned. People could get up,
						
						move about, exchange their accumulated impressions, refresh themselves
						
						at the buffet. It was very late, almost one o'clock in the night,
						
						but nobody went away: the strain was so great that no one could
						
						think of repose. All waited with sinking hearts; though that is,
						
						perhaps, too much to say, for the ladies were only in a state of
						
						hysterical impatience and their hearts were untroubled. An
						
						acquittal, they thought, was inevitable. They all prepared
						
						themselves for a dramatic moment of general enthusiasm. I must own
						
						there were many among the men, too, who were convinced that an
						
						acquittal was inevitable. Some were pleased, others frowned, while
						
						some were simply dejected, not wanting him to be acquitted.</p><p id="xiv-p14">Fetyukovitch himself was confident of his success. He was surrounded
						
						by people congratulating him and fawning upon him.</p><p id="xiv-p15">    "There are," he said to one group, as I was told afterwards,
						
						"there are invisible threads binding the counsel for the defence
						
						with the jury. One feels during one's speech if they are being formed.</p><p id="xiv-p16">I was aware of them. They exist. Our cause is won. Set your mind at
						
						rest."</p><p id="xiv-p17">    "What will our peasants say now?" said one stout, cross-looking,
						
						pock-marked gentleman, a landowner of the neighbourhood, approaching a
						
						group of gentlemen engaged in conversation.</p><p id="xiv-p18">    "But they are not all peasants. There are four government clerks
						
						among them."</p><p id="xiv-p19">    "Yes, there are clerks," said a member of the district council,
						
						joining the group.</p><p id="xiv-p20">    "And do you know that Nazaryev, the merchant with the medal, a
						
						juryman?"</p><p id="xiv-p21">    "What of him?"</p><p id="xiv-p22">    "He is a man with brains."</p><p id="xiv-p23">    "But he never speaks."</p><p id="xiv-p24">    "He is no great talker, but so much the better. There's no need
						
						for the Petersburg man to teach him: he could teach all Petersburg
						
						himself. He's the father of twelve children. Think of that!"</p><p id="xiv-p25">    "Upon my word, you don't suppose they won't acquit him?" one of
						
						our young officials exclaimed in another group.</p><p id="xiv-p26">    "They'll acquit him for certain," said a resolute voice.</p><p id="xiv-p27">    "It would be shameful, disgraceful, not to acquit him cried the
						
						official. "Suppose he did murder him- there are fathers and fathers!</p><p id="xiv-p28">And, besides, he was in such a frenzy.... He really may have done
						
						nothing but swing the pestle in the air, and so knocked the old man
						
						down. But it was a pity they dragged the valet in. That was simply
						
						an absurd theory! If I'd been in Fetyukovitch's place, I should simply
						
						have said straight out: 'He murdered him; but he is not guilty, hang
						
						it all!'</p><p id="xiv-p29">    "That's what he did, only without saying, 'Hang it all!'"</p><p id="xiv-p30">    "No, Mihail Semyonovitch, he almost said that, too," put in a
						
						third voice.</p><p id="xiv-p31">    "Why, gentlemen, in Lent an actress was acquitted in our town
						
						who had cut the throat of her lover's lawful wife."</p><p id="xiv-p32">    "Oh, but she did not finish cutting it."</p><p id="xiv-p33">    "That makes no difference. She began cutting it."</p><p id="xiv-p34">    "What did you think of what he said about children? Splendid,
						
						wasn't it?"</p><p id="xiv-p35">    "Splended!"</p><p id="xiv-p36">    "And about mysticism, too!"</p><p id="xiv-p37">    "Oh, drop mysticism, do!" cried someone else; "think of Ippolit
						
						and his fate from this day forth. His wife will scratch his eyes out
						
						to-morrow for Mitya's sake."</p><p id="xiv-p38">    "Is she here?"</p><p id="xiv-p39">    "What an idea! If she'd been here she'd have scratched them out in
						
						court. She is at home with toothache. He he he!"</p><p id="xiv-p40">    "He he he!"</p><p id="xiv-p41">    In a third group:</p><p id="xiv-p42">    "I dare say they will acquit Mitenka, after all."</p><p id="xiv-p43">    "I should not be surprised if he turns the Metropolis upside
						
						down to-morrow. He will be drinking for ten days!"</p><p id="xiv-p44">    "Oh, the devil!"</p><p id="xiv-p45">    "The devil's bound to have a hand in it. Where should he be if not
						
						here?"</p><p id="xiv-p46">    "Well, gentlemen, I admit it was eloquent. But still it's not
						
						the thing to break your father's head with a pestle! Or what are we
						
						coming to?"</p><p id="xiv-p47">    "The chariot! Do you remember the chariot?"</p><p id="xiv-p48">    "Yes; he turned a cart into a chariot!"</p><p id="xiv-p49">    "And to-morrow he will turn a chariot into a cart, just to suit
						
						his purpose."</p><p id="xiv-p50">    "What cunning chaps there are nowadays! Is there any justice to be
						
						had in Russia?"</p><p id="xiv-p51">    But the bell rang. The jury deliberated for exactly an hour,
						
						neither more nor less. A profound silence reigned in the court as soon
						
						as the public had taken their seats. I remember how the jurymen walked
						
						into the court. At last! I won't repeat the questions in order, and,
						
						indeed, I have forgotten them. I remember only the answer to the
						
						President's first and chief question: "Did the prisoner commit the
						
						murder for the sake of robbery and with premeditation?" (I don't
						
						remember the exact words.) There was a complete hush. The foreman of
						
						the jury, the youngest of the clerks, pronounced, in a clear, loud
						
						voice, amidst the deathlike stillness of the court:</p><p id="xiv-p52">    "Yes, guilty!"</p><p id="xiv-p53">    And the same answer was repeated to every question: "Yes, guilty!"</p><p id="xiv-p54">and without the slightest extenuating comment. This no one had
						
						expected; almost everyone had reckoned upon a recommendation to mercy,
						
						at least. The death-like silence in the court was not broken- all
						
						seemed petrified: those who desired his conviction as well as those
						
						who had been eager for his acquittal. But that was only for the
						
						first instant, and it was followed by a fearful hubbub. Many of the
						
						men in the audience were pleased. Some were rubbing their hands with
						
						no attempt to conceal their joy. Those who disagreed with the
						
						verdict seemed crushed, shrugged their shoulders, whispered, but still
						
						seemed unable to realise this. But how shall I describe the state
						
						the ladies were in? I thought they would create a riot. At first
						
						they could scarcely believe their ears. Then suddenly the whole
						
						court rang with exclamations: "What's the meaning of it? What next?"</p><p id="xiv-p55">They leapt up from their places. They seemed to fancy that it might be
						
						at once reconsidered and reversed. At that instant Mitya suddenly
						
						stood up and cried in a heart-rending voice, stretching his hands
						
						out before him:</p><p id="xiv-p56">    "I swear by God and the dreadful Day of Judgment I am not guilty
						
						of my father's blood! Katya, I forgive you! Brothers, friends, have
						
						pity on the other woman!"</p><p id="xiv-p57">    He could not go on, and broke into a terrible sobbing wail that
						
						was heard all over the court in a strange, unnatural voice unlike
						
						his own. From the farthest corner at the back of the gallery came a
						
						piercing shriek- it was Grushenka. She had succeeded in begging
						
						admittance to the court again before the beginning of the lawyers'</p><p id="xiv-p58">speeches. Mitya was taken away. The passing of the sentence was
						
						deferred till next day. The whole court was in a hubbub but I did
						
						not wait to hear. I only remember a few exclamations I heard on the
						
						steps as I went out.</p><p id="xiv-p59">    "He'll have a twenty years' trip to the mines!"</p><p id="xiv-p60">    "Not less."</p><p id="xiv-p61">    "Well, our peasants have stood firm."</p><p id="xiv-p62">    "And have done for our Mitya."</p>					
					
					</div4> 			
				</div3>
			</div2>

<div2 title="EPILOGUE" prev="xiv" next="i_18" id="v_10">

<div3 title="Chapter 1 - Plans for Mitya's Escape" prev="v_10" next="ii_17" id="i_18">
					
					



						<p id="i_18-p1">VERY early, at nine o'clock in the morning, five days after the
					
					trial, Alyosha went to Katerina Ivanovna's to talk over a matter of
					
					great importance to both of them, and to give her a message. She sat
					
					and talked to him in the very room in which she had once received
					
					Grushenka. In the next room Ivan Fyodorovitch lay unconscious in a
					
					high fever. Katerina Ivanovna had immediately after the scene at the
					
					trial ordered the sick and unconscious man to be carried to her house,
					
					disregarding the inevitable gossip and general disapproval of the
					
					public. One of two relations who lived with her had departed to Moscow
					
					immediately after the scene in court, the other remained. But if
					
					both had gone away, Katerina Ivanovna would have adhered to her
					
					resolution, and would have gone on nursing the sick man and sitting by
					
					him day and night. Varvinsky and Herzenstube were attending him. The
					
					famous doctor had gone back to Moscow, refusing to give an opinion
					
					as to the probable end of the illness. Though the doctors encouraged
					
					Katerina Ivanovna and Alyosha, it was evident that they could not
					
					yet give them positive hopes of recovery.</p><p id="i_18-p2">    Alyosha came to see his sick brother twice a day. But this time he
					
					had specially urgent business, and he foresaw how difficult it would
					
					be to approach the subject, yet he was in great haste. He had
					
					another engagement that could not be put off for that same morning,
					
					and there was need of haste.</p><p id="i_18-p3">    They had been talking for a quarter of an hour. Katerina
					
					Ivanovna was pale and terribly fatigued, yet at the same time in a
					
					state of hysterical excitement. She had a presentiment of the reason
					
					why Alyosha had come to her.</p><p id="i_18-p4">    "Don't worry about his decision," she said, with confident
					
					emphasis to Alyosha. "One way or another he is bound to come to it. He
					
					must escape. That unhappy man, that hero of honour and principle-
					
					not he, not Dmitri Fyodorovitch, but the man lying the other side of
					
					that door, who has sacrificed himself for his brother," Katya added,
					
					with flashing eyes- "told me the whole plan of escape long ago. You
					
					know he has already entered into negotiations.... I've told you
					
					something already.... You see, it will probably come off at the
					
					third etape from here, when the party of prisoners is being taken to
					
					Siberia. Oh, it's a long way off yet. Ivan Fyodorovitch has already
					
					visited the superintendent of the third etape. But we don't know yet
					
					who will be in charge of the party, and it's impossible to find that
					
					out so long beforehand. To-morrow, perhaps, I will show you in
					
					detail the whole plan which Ivan Fyodorovitch left me on the eve of
					
					the trial in case of need.... That was when- do you remember?- you
					
					found us quarrelling. He had just gone downstairs, but seeing you I
					
					made him come back; do you remember? Do you know what we were
					
					quarrelling about then?"</p><p id="i_18-p5">    "No, I don't," said Alyosha.</p><p id="i_18-p6">    "Of course he did not tell you. It was about that plan of
					
					escape. He had told me the main idea three days before, and we began
					
					quarrelling about it at once and quarrelled for three days. We
					
					quarrelled because, when he told me that if Dmitri Fyodorovitch were
					
					convicted he would escape abroad with that creature, I felt furious at
					
					once- I can't tell you why, I don't know myself why.... Oh, of course,
					
					I was furious then about that creature, and that she, too, should go
					
					abroad with Dmitri!" Katerina Ivanovna exclaimed suddenly, her lips
					
					quivering with anger. "As soon as Ivan Fyodorovitch saw that I was
					
					furious about that woman, he instantly imagined I was jealous of
					
					Dmitri and that I still loved Dmitri. That is how our first quarrel
					
					began. I would not give an explanation, I could not ask forgiveness. I
					
					could not bear to think that such a man could suspect me of still
					
					loving that... and when I myself had told him long before that I did
					
					not love Dmitri, that I loved no one but him! It was only resentment
					
					against that creature that made me angry with him. Three days later,
					
					on the evening you came, he brought me a sealed envelope, which I
					
					was to open at once, if anything happened to him. Oh, he foresaw his
					
					illness! He told me that the envelope contained the details of the
					
					escape, and that if he died or was taken dangerously ill, I was to
					
					save Mitya alone. Then he left me money, nearly ten thousand- those
					
					notes to which the prosecutor referred in his speech, having learnt
					
					from someone that he had sent them to be changed. I was tremendously
					
					impressed to find that Ivan Fyodorovitch had not given up his idea
					
					of saving his brother, and was confiding this plan of escape to me,
					
					though he was still jealous of me and still convinced that I loved
					
					Mitya. Oh, that was a sacrifice! No, you cannot understand the
					
					greatness of such self-sacrifice, Alexey Fyodorovitch. I wanted to
					
					fall at his feet in reverence, but I thought at once that he would
					
					take it only for my joy at the thought of Mitya's being saved (and
					
					he certainly would have imagined that!), and I was so exasperated at
					
					the mere possibility of such an unjust thought on his part that I lost
					
					my temper again, and instead of kissing his feet, flew into a fury
					
					again! Oh, I am unhappy! It's my character, my awful, unhappy
					
					character! Oh, you will see, I shall end by driving him, too, to
					
					abandon me for another with whom he can get on better, like Dmitri.</p><p id="i_18-p7">But... no, I could not bear it, I should kill myself. And when you
					
					came in then, and when I called to you and told him to come back, I
					
					was so enraged by the look of contempt and hatred he turned on me that
					
					do you remember?- I cried out to you that it was he, he alone who
					
					had persuaded me that his brother Dmitri was a murderer! I said that
					
					malicious thing on purpose to wound him again. He had never, never
					
					persuaded me that his brother was a murderer. On the contrary, it
					
					was I who persuaded him! Oh, my vile temper was the cause of
					
					everything! I paved the way to that hideous scene at the trial. He
					
					wanted to show me that he was an honourable man, and that, even if I
					
					loved his brother, he would not ruin him for revenge or jealousy. So
					
					he came to the court... I am the cause of it all, I alone am to
					
					blame!"</p><p id="i_18-p8">    Katya never had made such confessions to Alyosha before, and he
					
					felt that she was now at that stage of unbearable suffering when
					
					even the proudest heart painfully crushes its pride and falls
					
					vanquished by grief. Oh, Alyosha knew another terrible reason of her
					
					present misery, though she had carefully concealed it from him
					
					during those days since the trial; but it would have been, for some
					
					reason, too painful to him if she had been brought so low as to
					
					speak to him now about that. She was suffering for her "treachery"</p><p id="i_18-p9">at the trial, and Alyosha felt that her conscience was impelling her
					
					to confess it to him, to him, Alyosha, with tears and cries and
					
					hysterical writhings on the floor. But he dreaded that moment and
					
					longed to spare her. It made the commission on which he had come
					
					even more difficult. He spoke of Mitya again.</p><p id="i_18-p10">    "It's all right, it's all right, don't be anxious about him! she
					
					began again, sharply and stubbornly. "All that is only momentary, I
					
					know him, I know his heart only too well. You may be sure he will
					
					consent to escape. It's not as though it would be immediately; he will
					
					have time to make up his mind to it. Ivan Fyodorovitch will be well by
					
					that time and will manage it all himself, so that I shall have nothing
					
					to do with it. Don't be anxious; he will consent to run away. He has
					
					agreed already: do you suppose he would give up that creature? And
					
					they won't let her go to him, so he is bound to escape. It's you
					
					he's most afraid of, he is afraid you won't approve of his escape on
					
					moral grounds. But you must generously allow it, if your sanction is
					
					so necessary," Katya added viciously. She paused and smiled.</p><p id="i_18-p11">    "He talks about some hymn," she went on again, "some cross he
					
					has to bear, some duty; I remember Ivan Fyodorovitch told me a great
					
					deal about it, and if you knew how he talked! Katya cried suddenly,
					
					with feeling she could not repress, "If you knew how he loved that
					
					wretched man at the moment he told me, and how he hated him,
					
					perhaps, at the same moment. And I heard his story and his tears
					
					with sneering disdain. Brute! Yes, I am a brute. I am responsible
					
					for his fever. But that man in prison is incapable of suffering,"</p><p id="i_18-p12">Katya concluded irritably. "Can such a man suffer? Men like him
					
					never suffer!" There was a note of hatred and contemptuous repulsion
					
					in her words. And yet it was she who had betrayed him. "Perhaps
					
					because she feels how she's wronged him she hates him at moments,"</p><p id="i_18-p13">Alyosha thought to himself. He hoped that it was only "at moments." In
					
					Katya's last words he detected a challenging note, but he did not take
					
					it up.</p><p id="i_18-p14">    "I sent for you this morning to make you promise to persuade him
					
					yourself. Or do you, too, consider that to escape would be
					
					dishonourable, cowardly, or something... unchristian, perhaps?"</p><p id="i_18-p15">Katya added, even more defiantly.</p><p id="i_18-p16">    "Oh, no. I'll tell him everything," muttered Alyosha. "He asks you
					
					to come and see him to-day," he blurted out suddenly, looking her
					
					steadily in the face. She started, and drew back a little from him
					
					on the sofa.</p><p id="i_18-p17">    "Me? Can that be?" She faltered, turning pale.</p><p id="i_18-p18">    "It can and ought to be!" Alyosha began emphatically, growing more
					
					animated. "He needs you particularly just now. I would not have opened
					
					the subject and worried you, if it were not necessary. He is ill, he
					
					is beside himself, he keeps asking for you. It is not to be reconciled
					
					with you that he wants you, but only that you would go and show
					
					yourself at his door. So much has happened to him since that day. He
					
					realises that he has injured you beyond all reckoning. He does not ask
					
					your forgiveness- 'It's impossible to forgive me,' he says himself-
					
					but only that you would show yourself in his doorway."</p><p id="i_18-p19">    "It's so sudden..." faltered Katya. "I've had a presentiment all
					
					these days that you would come with that message. I knew he would
					
					ask me to come. It's impossible!"</p><p id="i_18-p20">    "Let it be impossible, but do it. Only think, he realises for
					
					the first time how he has wounded you, the first time in his life;
					
					he had never grasped it before so fully. He said, 'If she refuses to
					
					come I shall be unhappy all my life.' you hear? though he is condemned
					
					to penal servitude for twenty years, he is still planning to be happy-
					
					is not that piteous? Think- you must visit him; though he is ruined,
					
					he is innocent," broke like a challenge from Alyosha. "His hands are
					
					clean, there is no blood on them! For the sake of his infinite
					
					sufferings in the future visit him now. Go, greet him on his way
					
					into the darkness- stand at his door, that is all.... You ought to
					
					do it, you ought to!" Alyosha concluded, laying immense stress on
					
					the word "ought."</p><p id="i_18-p21">    "I ought to... but I cannot..." Katya moaned. "He will look at
					
					me.... I can't."</p><p id="i_18-p22">    "Your eyes ought to meet. How will you live all your life, if
					
					you don't make up your mind to do it now?"</p><p id="i_18-p23">    "Better suffer all my life."</p><p id="i_18-p24">    "You ought to go, you ought to go," Alyosha repeated with
					
					merciless emphasis.</p><p id="i_18-p25">    "But why to-day, why at once?... I can't leave our patient-"</p><p id="i_18-p26">    "You can for a moment. It will only be a moment. If you don't
					
					come, he will be in delirium by to-night. I would not tell you a
					
					lie; have pity on him!"</p><p id="i_18-p27">    "Have pity on me!" Katya said, with bitter reproach, and she burst
					
					into tears.</p><p id="i_18-p28">    "Then you will come," said Alyosha firmly, seeing her tears. "I'll
					
					go and tell him you will come directly."</p><p id="i_18-p29">    "No, don't tell him so on any account," cried Katya in alarm. "I
					
					will come, but don't tell him beforehand, for perhaps I may go, but
					
					not go in... I don't know yet-"</p><p id="i_18-p30">    Her voice failed her. She gasped for breath. Alyosha got up to go.</p><p id="i_18-p31">    "And what if I meet anyone?" she said suddenly, in a low voice,
					
					turning white again.</p><p id="i_18-p32">    "That's just why you must go now, to avoid meeting anyone. There
					
					will be no one there, I can tell you that for certain. We will
					
					expect you," he concluded emphatically, and went out of the room.</p>					
					
					
					
				</div3>

<div3 title="Chapter 2 - For a Moment the Lie Becomes Truth" prev="i_18" next="iii_17" id="ii_17">
				


						<p id="ii_17-p1">HE hurried to the hospital where Mitya was lying now. The day
					
					after his fate was determined, Mitya had fallen ill with nervous
					
					fever, and was sent to the prison division of the town hospital. But
					
					at the request of several persons (Alyosha, Madame Hohlakov, Lise,
					
					etc.), Doctor Varvinsky had put Mitya not with other prisoners, but in
					
					a separate little room, the one where Smerdyakov had been. It is
					
					true that there was a sentinel at the other end of the corridor, and
					
					there was a grating over the window, so that Varvinsky could be at
					
					ease about the indulgence he had shown, which was not quite legal,
					
					indeed; but he was a kind-hearted and compassionate young man. He knew
					
					how hard it would be for a man like Mitya to pass at once so
					
					suddenly into the society of robbers and murderers, and that he must
					
					get used to it by degrees. The visits of relations and friends were
					
					informally sanctioned by the doctor and overseer, and even by the
					
					police captain. But only Alyosha and Grushenka had visited Mitya.</p><p id="ii_17-p2">Rakitin had tried to force his way in twice, but Mitya persistently
					
					begged Varvinsky not to admit him.</p><p id="ii_17-p3">    Alyosha found him sitting on his bed in a hospital dressing
					
					gown, rather feverish, with a towel, soaked in vinegar and water, on
					
					his head. He looked at Alyosha as he came in with an undefined
					
					expression, but there was a shade of something like dread
					
					discernible in it. He had become terribly preoccupied since the trial;
					
					sometimes he would be silent for half an hour together, and seemed
					
					to be pondering something heavily and painfully, oblivious of
					
					everything about him. If he roused himself from his brooding and began
					
					to talk, he always spoke with a kind of abruptness and never of what
					
					he really wanted to say. He looked sometimes with a face of
					
					suffering at his brother. He seemed to be more at ease with
					
					Grushenka than with Alyosha. It is true, he scarcely spoke to her at
					
					all, but as soon as she came in, his whole face lighted up with joy.</p><p id="ii_17-p4">    Alyosha sat down beside him on the bed in silence. This time Mitya
					
					was waiting for Alyosha in suspense, but he did not dare ask him a
					
					question. He felt it almost unthinkable that Katya would consent to
					
					come, and at the same time he felt that if she did not come, something
					
					inconceivable would happen. Alyosha understood his feelings.</p><p id="ii_17-p5">    "Trifon Borissovitch," Mitya began nervously, "has pulled his
					
					whole inn to pieces, I am told. He's taken up the flooring, pulled
					
					apart the planks, split up all the gallery, I am told. He is seeking
					
					treasure all the time- the fifteen hundred roubles which the
					
					prosecutor said I'd hidden there. He began playing these tricks,
					
					they say, as soon as he got home. Serve him right, the swindler! The
					
					guard here told me yesterday; he comes from there."</p><p id="ii_17-p6">    "Listen," began Alyosha. "She will come, but I don't know when.</p><p id="ii_17-p7">Perhaps to-day, perhaps in a few days, that I can't tell. But she will
					
					come, she will, that's certain."</p><p id="ii_17-p8">    Mitya started, would have said something, but was silent. The news
					
					had a tremendous effect on him. It was evident that he would have
					
					liked terribly to know what had been said, but he was again afraid
					
					to ask. Something cruel and contemptuous from Katya would have cut him
					
					like a knife at that moment.</p><p id="ii_17-p9">    "This was what she said among other things; that I must be sure to
					
					set your conscience at rest about escaping. If Ivan is not well by
					
					then she will see to it all herself."</p><p id="ii_17-p10">    "You've spoken of that already," Mitya observed musingly.</p><p id="ii_17-p11">    "And you have repeated it to Grusha," observed Alyosha.</p><p id="ii_17-p12">    "Yes," Mitya admitted. "She won't come this morning." He looked
					
					timidly at his brother. "She won't come till the evening. When I
					
					told her yesterday that Katya was taking measures, she was silent, but
					
					she set her mouth. She only whispered, 'Let her!' She understood
					
					that it was important. I did not dare to try her further. She
					
					understands now, I think, that Katya no longer cares for me, but loves
					
					Ivan."</p><p id="ii_17-p13">    "Does she?" broke from Alyosha.</p><p id="ii_17-p14">    "Perhaps she does not. Only she is not coming this morning," Mitya
					
					hastened to explain again; "I asked her to do something for me. You
					
					know, Ivan is superior to all of us. He ought to live, not us. He will
					
					recover."</p><p id="ii_17-p15">    "Would you believe it, though Katya is alarmed about him, she
					
					scarcely doubts of his recovery," said Alyosha.</p><p id="ii_17-p16">    "That means that she is convinced he will die. It's because she is
					
					frightened she's so sure he will get well."</p><p id="ii_17-p17">    "Ivan has a strong constitution, and I, too, believe there's every
					
					hope that he will get well," Alyosha observed anxiously.</p><p id="ii_17-p18">    "Yes, he will get well. But she is convinced that he will die. She
					
					has a great deal of sorrow to bear..." A silence followed. A grave
					
					anxiety was fretting Mitya.</p><p id="ii_17-p19">    "Alyosha, I love Grusha terribly," he said suddenly in a shaking
					
					voice, full of tears.</p><p id="ii_17-p20">    "They won't let her go out there to you," Alyosha put in at once.</p><p id="ii_17-p21">    "And there is something else I wanted tell you," Mitya went on,
					
					with a sudden ring in his voice. "If they beat me on the way or out
					
					there, I won't submit to it. I shall kill someone, and shall be shot
					
					for it. And this will be going on for twenty years! They speak to me
					
					rudely as it is. I've been lying here all night, passing judgment on
					
					myself. I am not ready! I am not able to resign myself. I wanted to
					
					sing a 'hymn'; but if a guard speaks rudely to me, I have not the
					
					strength to bear it. For Grusha I would bear anything... anything
					
					except blows.... But she won't be allowed to come there."</p><p id="ii_17-p22">    Alyosha smiled gently.</p><p id="ii_17-p23">    "Listen, brother, once for all," he said. "This is what I think
					
					about it. And you know that I would not tell you a lie. Listen: you
					
					are not ready, and such a cross is not for you. What's more, you don't
					
					need such a martyr's cross when you are not ready for it. If you had
					
					murdered our father, it would grieve me that you should reject your
					
					punishment. But you are innocent, and such a cross is too much for
					
					you. You wanted to make yourself another man by suffering. I say, only
					
					remember that other man always, all your life and wherever you go; and
					
					that will be enough for you. Your refusal of that great cross will
					
					only serve to make you feel all your life even greater duty, and
					
					that constant feeling will do more to make you a new man, perhaps,
					
					than if you went there. For there you would not endure it and would
					
					repine, and perhaps at last would say: 'I am quits.' The lawyer was
					
					right about that. Such heavy burdens are not for all men. For some
					
					they are impossible. These are my thoughts about it, if you want
					
					them so much. If other men would have to answer for your escape,
					
					officers or soldiers, then I would not have 'allowed' you," smiled
					
					Alyosha. "But they declare- the superintendent of that etape* told
					
					Ivan himself- that if it's well managed there will be no great
					
					inquiry, and that they can get off easily. Of course, bribing is
					
					dishonest even in such a case, but I can't undertake to judge about
					
					it, because if Ivan and Katya commissioned me to act for you, I know I
					
					should go and give bribes. I must tell you the truth. And so I can't
					
					judge of your own action. But let me assure you that I shall never
					
					condemn you. And it would be a strange thing if I could judge you in
					
					this. Now I think I've gone into everything."</p><p id="ii_17-p24" /><p id="ii_17-p25">
					
						* Stockade.</p><p id="ii_17-p26" /><p id="ii_17-p27">
					
						"But I do condemn myself!" cried Mitya. "I shall escape, that
					
					was settled apart from you; could Mitya Karamazov do anything but
					
					run away? But I shall condemn myself, and I will pray for my sin for
					
					ever. That's how the Jesuits talk, isn't it? Just as we are doing?"</p><p id="ii_17-p28">    "Yes." Alyosha smiled gently.</p><p id="ii_17-p29">    "I love you for always telling the whole truth and never hiding
					
					anything," cried Mitya, with a joyful laugh. "So I've caught my
					
					Alyosha being Jesuitical. I must kiss you for that. Now listen to
					
					the rest; I'll open the other side of my heart to you. This is what
					
					I planned and decided. If I run away, even with money and a
					
					passport, and even to America, I should be cheered up by the thought
					
					that I am not running away for pleasure, not for happiness, but to
					
					another exile as bad, perhaps, as Siberia. It is as bad, Alyosha, it
					
					is! I hate that America, damn it, already. Even though Grusha will
					
					be with me. Just look at her; is she an American? She is Russian,
					
					Russian to the marrow of her bones; she will be homesick for the
					
					mother country, and I shall see every hour that she is suffering for
					
					my sake, that she has taken up that cross for me. And what harm has
					
					she done? And how shall I, too, put up with the rabble out there,
					
					though they may be better than I, every one of them? I hate that
					
					America already! And though they may be wonderful at machinery,
					
					every one of them, damn them, they are not of my soul. I love
					
					Russia, Alyosha, I love the Russian God, though I am a scoundrel
					
					myself. I shall choke there!" he exclaimed, his eyes suddenly
					
					flashing. His voice was trembling with tears. "So this is what I've
					
					decided, Alyosha, listen," he began again, mastering his emotion.</p><p id="ii_17-p30">"As soon as I arrive there with Grusha, we will set to work at once on
					
					the land, in solitude, somewhere very remote, with wild bears. There
					
					must be some remote parts even there. I am told there are still
					
					Redskins there, somewhere, on the edge of the horizon. So to the
					
					country of the Last of the Mohicans, and there we'll tackle the
					
					grammar at once, Grusha and I. Work and grammar- that's how we'll
					
					spend three years. And by that time we shall speak English like any
					
					Englishman. And as soon as we've learnt it- good-bye to America! We'll
					
					run here to Russia as American citizens. Don't be uneasy- we would not
					
					come to this little town. We'd hide somewhere, a long way off, in
					
					the north or in the south. I shall be changed by that time, and she
					
					will, too, in America. The doctors shall make me some sort of wart
					
					on my face- what's the use of their being so mechanical!- or else I'll
					
					put out one eye, let my beard grow a yard, and I shall turn grey,
					
					fretting for Russia. I dare say they won't recognise us. And if they
					
					do, let them send us to Siberia- I don't care. It will show it's our
					
					fate. We'll work on the land here, too, somewhere in the wilds, and
					
					I'll make up as an American all my life. But we shall die on our own
					
					soil. That's my plan, and it shan't be altered. Do you approve?"</p><p id="ii_17-p31">    "Yes," said Alyosha, not wanting to contradict him. Mitya paused
					
					for a minute and said suddenly:</p><p id="ii_17-p32">
					
						"And how they worked it up at the trial! Didn't they work it up!"</p><p id="ii_17-p33">    "If they had not, you would have been convicted just the same,"</p><p id="ii_17-p34">said Alyosha, with a sigh.</p><p id="ii_17-p35">    "Yes, people are sick of me here! God bless them, but it's
					
					hard," Mitya moaned miserably. Again there was silence for a minute.</p><p id="ii_17-p36">    "Alyosha, put me out of my misery at once!" he exclaimed suddenly.</p><p id="ii_17-p37">"Tell me, is she coming now, or not? Tell me? What did she say? How
					
					did she say it?"</p><p id="ii_17-p38">    "She said she would come, but I don't know whether she will come
					
					to-day. It's hard for her, you know," Alyosha looked timidly at his
					
					brother.</p><p id="ii_17-p39">    "I should think it is hard for her! Alyosha, it will drive me
					
					out of my mind. Grusha keeps looking at me. She understands. My God,
					
					calm my heart: what is it I want? I want Katya! Do I understand what I
					
					want? It's the headstrong, evil Karamazov spirit! No, I am not fit for
					
					suffering. I am a scoundrel, that's all one can say."</p><p id="ii_17-p40">    "Here she is!" cried Alyosha.</p><p id="ii_17-p41">    At that instant Katya appeared in the doorway. For a moment she
					
					stood still, gazing at Mitya with a dazed expression. He leapt
					
					pulsively to his feet, and a scared look came into his face. He turned
					
					pale, but a timid, pleading smile appeared on his lips at once, and
					
					with an irresistible impulse he held out both hands to Katya. Seeing
					
					it, she flew impetuously to him. She seized him by the hands, and
					
					almost by force made him sit down on the bed. She sat down beside him,
					
					and still keeping his hands pressed them violently. Several times they
					
					both strove to speak, but stopped short and again gazed speechless
					
					with a strange smile, their eyes fastened on one another. So passed
					
					two minutes.</p><p id="ii_17-p42">    "Have you forgiven me?" Mitya faltered at last, and at the same
					
					moment turning to Alyosha, his face working with joy, he cried, "Do
					
					you hear what I am asking, do you hear?"</p><p id="ii_17-p43">    "That's what I loved you for, that you are generous at heart!"</p><p id="ii_17-p44">broke from Katya. "My forgiveness is no good to you, nor yours to
					
					me; whether you forgive me or not, you will always be a sore place
					
					in my heart, and I in yours- so it must be...." She stopped to take
					
					breath. "What have I come for?" she began again with nervous haste:
					
					"to embrace your feet, to press your hands like this, till it hurts-
					
					you remember how in Moscow I used to squeeze them- to tell you again
					
					that you are my god, my joy, to tell you that I love you madly," she
					
					moaned in anguish, and suddenly pressed his hand greedily to her lips.</p><p id="ii_17-p45">Tears streamed from her eyes. Alyosha stood speechless and confounded;
					
					he had never expected what he was seeing.</p><p id="ii_17-p46">    "Love is over, Mitya!" Katya began again, "But the past is
					
					painfully dear to me. Know that you will always be so. But now let
					
					what might have been come true for one minute," she faltered, with a
					
					drawn smile, looking into his face joyfully again. "You love another
					
					woman, and I love another man, and yet I shall love you for ever,
					
					and you will love me; do you know that? Do you hear? Love me, love
					
					me all your life!" she cried, with a quiver almost of menace in her
					
					voice.</p><p id="ii_17-p47">    "I shall love you, and... do you know, Katya," Mitya began,
					
					drawing a deep breath at each word, "do you know, five days ago,
					
					that same evening, I loved you.... When you fell down and were carried
					
					out... All my life! So it will be, so it will always be-"</p><p id="ii_17-p48">    So they murmured to one another frantic words, almost meaningless,
					
					perhaps not even true, but at that moment it was all true, and they
					
					both believed what they said implicitly.</p><p id="ii_17-p49">    "Katya," cried Mitya suddenly, "do you believe I murdered him? I
					
					know you don't believe it now, but then... when you gave
					
					evidence.... Surely, surely you did not believe it!"</p><p id="ii_17-p50">    "I did not believe it even then. I've never believed it. I hated
					
					you, and for a moment I persuaded myself. While I was giving
					
					evidence I persuaded myself and believed it, but when I'd finished
					
					speaking I left off believing it at once. Don't doubt that! I have
					
					forgotten that I came here to punish myself," she said, with a new
					
					expression in her voice, quite unlike the loving tones of a moment
					
					before.</p><p id="ii_17-p51">    "Woman, yours is a heavy burden," broke, as it were, involuntarily
					
					from Mitya.</p><p id="ii_17-p52">    "Let me go," she whispered. "I'll come again. It's more than I can
					
					bear now."</p><p id="ii_17-p53">    She was getting up from her place, but suddenly uttered a loud
					
					scream and staggered back. Grushenka walked suddenly and noiselessly
					
					into the room. No one had expected her. Katya moved swiftly to the
					
					door, but when she reached Grushenka, she stopped suddenly, turned
					
					as white as chalk and moaned softly, almost in a whisper:
					
						"Forgive me!"</p><p id="ii_17-p54">    Grushenka stared at her and, pausing for an instant, in a
					
					vindictive, venomous voice, answered:</p><p id="ii_17-p55">
					
						"We are full of hatred, my girl, you and I! We are both full of
					
					hatred! As though we could forgive one another! Save him, and I'll
					
					worship you all my life."</p><p id="ii_17-p56">    "You won't forgive her!" cried Mitya, with frantic reproach.</p><p id="ii_17-p57">    "Don't be anxious, I'll save him for you!" Katya whispered
					
					rapidly, and she ran out of the room.</p><p id="ii_17-p58">    "And you could refuse to forgive her when she begged your
					
					forgiveness herself?' Mitya exclaimed bitterly again.</p><p id="ii_17-p59">    "Mitya, don't dare to blame her; you have no right to!" Alyosha
					
					cried hotly.</p><p id="ii_17-p60">    "Her proud lips spoke, not her heart," Grushenka brought out in
					
					a tone of disgust. "If she saves you I'll forgive her everything-"</p><p id="ii_17-p61">    She stopped speaking, as though suppressing something. She could
					
					not yet recover herself. She had come in, as appeared afterwards,
					
					accidentally, with no suspicion of what she would meet.</p><p id="ii_17-p62">    "Alyosha, run after her!" Mitya cried to his brother; "tell her...</p><p id="ii_17-p63">I don't know... don't let her go away like this!"</p><p id="ii_17-p64">    "I'll come to you again at nightfall," said Alyosha, and he ran
					
					after Katya. He overtook her outside the hospital grounds. She walking
					
					fast, but as soon as Alyosha caught her up she said quickly:</p><p id="ii_17-p65">
					
						"No, before that woman I can't punish myself! I asked her
					
					forgiveness because I wanted to punish myself to the bitter end. She
					
					would not forgive me.... I like her for that!" she added, in an
					
					unnatural voice, and her eyes flashed with fierce resentment.</p><p id="ii_17-p66">    "My brother did not expect this in the least," muttered Alyosha.</p><p id="ii_17-p67">"He was sure she would not come-"</p><p id="ii_17-p68">    "No doubt. Let us leave that," she snapped. "Listen: I can't go
					
					with you to the funeral now. I've sent them flowers. I think they
					
					still have money. If necessary, tell them I'll never abandon
					
					them.... Now leave me, leave me, please. You are late as it is- the
					
					bells are ringing for the service.... Leave me, please!"</p>
				
				
				
				</div3>

<div3 title="Chapter 3 - Ilusha's Funeral. The Speech at the Stone" prev="ii_17" next="toc" id="iii_17">
				


					<p id="iii_17-p1">HE really was late. They had waited for him and had already
				
				decided to bear the pretty flower-decked little coffin to the church
				
				without him. It was the coffin of poor little Ilusha. He had died
				
				two days after Mitya was sentenced. At the gate of the house Alyosha
				
				was met by the shouts of the boys, Ilusha's schoolfellows. They had
				
				all been impatiently expecting him and were glad that he had come at
				
				last. There were about twelve of them, they all had their
				
				school-bags or satchels on their shoulders. "Father will cry, be
				
				with father," Ilusha had told them as he lay dying, and the boys
				
				remembered it. Kolya Krassotkin was the foremost of them.</p><p id="iii_17-p2">    "How glad I am you've come, Karamazov!" he cried, holding out
				
				his hand to Alyosha. "It's awful here. It's really horrible to see it.</p><p id="iii_17-p3">Snegiryov is not drunk, we know for a fact he's had nothing to drink
				
				to-day, but he seems as if he were drunk... I am always manly, but
				
				this is awful. Karamazov, if I am not keeping you, one question before
				
				you go in?"</p><p id="iii_17-p4">    "What is it, Kolya?" said Alyosha.</p><p id="iii_17-p5">    "Is your brother innocent or guilty? Was it he killed your
				
				father or was it the valet? As you say, so it will be. I haven't slept
				
				for the last four nights for thinking of it."</p><p id="iii_17-p6">    "The valet killed him, my brother is innocent," answered Alyosha.</p><p id="iii_17-p7">    "That's what I said," cried Smurov.</p><p id="iii_17-p8">    "So he will perish an innocent victim!" exclaimed Kolya; "though
				
				he is ruined he is happy! I could envy him!"</p><p id="iii_17-p9">    "What do you mean? How can you? Why?" cried Alyosha surprised.</p><p id="iii_17-p10">    "Oh, if I, too, could sacrifice myself some day for truth!" said
				
				Kolya with enthusiasm.</p><p id="iii_17-p11">    "But not in such a cause, not with such disgrace and such horrer!"</p><p id="iii_17-p12">said Alyosha.</p><p id="iii_17-p13">    "Of course... I should like to die for all humanity, and as for
				
				disgrace, I don't care about that- our names may perish. I respect
				
				your brother!"</p><p id="iii_17-p14">    "And so do I!" the boy, who had once declared that he knew who had
				
				founded Troy, cried suddenly and unexpectedly, and he blushed up to
				
				his ears like a peony as he had done on that occasion.</p><p id="iii_17-p15">    Alyosha went into the room. Ilusha lay with his hands folded and
				
				his eyes closed in a blue coffin with a white frill round it. His thin
				
				face was hardly changed at all, and strange to say there was no
				
				smell of decay from the corpse. The expression of his face was serious
				
				and, as it were, thoughtful. His hands, crossed over his breast,
				
				looked particularly beautiful, as though chiselled in marble. There
				
				were flowers in his hands and the coffin, with flowers, which had been
				
				sent early in the morning by Lise Hohlakov. But there were flowers too
				
				from Katerina Ivanovna, and when Alyosha opened the door, the
				
				captain had a bunch in his trembling hands and was strewing them again
				
				over his dear boy. He scarcely glanced at Alyosha when he came in, and
				
				he would not look at anyone, even at his crazy weeping wife,
				
				"mamma," who kept trying to stand on her crippled legs to get a nearer
				
				look at her dead boy. Nina had been pushed in her chair by the boys
				
				close up to the coffin. She sat with her head pressed to it and she
				
				too was no doubt quietly weeping. Snegiryov's face looked eager, yet
				
				bewildered and exasperated. There was something crazy about his
				
				gestures and the words that broke from him. "Old man, dear old man!"</p><p id="iii_17-p16">he exclaimed every minute, gazing at Ilusha. It was his habit to
				
				call Ilusha "old man," as a term of affection when he was alive.</p><p id="iii_17-p17">    "Father, give me a flower, too; take that white one out of his
				
				hand and give it me," the crazy mother begged, whimpering. Either
				
				because the little white rose in Ilusha's hand had caught her fancy or
				
				that she wanted one from his hand to keep in memory of him, she
				
				moved restlessly, stretching out her hands for the flower.</p><p id="iii_17-p18">    "I won't give it to anyone, I won't give you anything,"</p><p id="iii_17-p19">Snegiryov cried callously. "They are his flowers, not yours!
				
				Everything is his, nothing is yours!"</p><p id="iii_17-p20">    "Father, give mother a flower!" said Nina, lifting her face wet
				
				with tears.</p><p id="iii_17-p21">    "I won't give away anything and to her less than anyone! She
				
				didn't love Ilusha. She took away his little cannon and he gave it
				
				to her," the captain broke into loud sobs at the thought of how Ilusha
				
				had given up his cannon to his mother. The poor, crazy creature was
				
				bathed in noiseless tears, hiding her face in her hands.</p><p id="iii_17-p22">    The boys, seeing that the father would not leave the coffin and
				
				that it was time to carry it out, stood round it in a close circle and
				
				began to lift it up.</p><p id="iii_17-p23">    "I don't want him to be buried in the churchyard," Snegiryov
				
				wailed suddenly; "I'll bury him by the stone, by our stone! Ilusha
				
				told me to. I won't let him be carried out!" He had been saying for
				
				the last three days that he would bury him by the stone, but
				
				Alyosha, Krassotkin, the landlady, her sister and all the boys
				
				interfered.</p><p id="iii_17-p24">    "What an idea, bury him by an unholy stone, as though he had
				
				hanged himself!" the old landlady said sternly. "There in the
				
				churchyard the ground has been crossed. He'll be prayed for there. One
				
				can hear the singing in church and the deacon reads so plainly and
				
				verbally that it will reach him every time just as though it were read
				
				over his grave."</p><p id="iii_17-p25">    At last the captain made a gesture of despair as though to say,
				
				"Take him where you will." The boys raised the coffin, but as they
				
				passed the mother, they stopped for a moment and lowered it that she
				
				might say good-bye to Ilusha. But on seeing that precious little face,
				
				which for the last three days she had only looked at from a
				
				distance, she trembled all over and her grey head began twitching
				
				spasmodically over the coffin.</p><p id="iii_17-p26">    "Mother, make the sign of the cross over him, give him your
				
				blessing, kiss him," Nina cried to her. But her head still twitched
				
				like an automaton and with a face contorted with bitter grief she
				
				began, without a word, beating her breast with her fist. They
				
				carried the coffin past her. Nina pressed her lips to her brother's
				
				for the last time as they bore the coffin by her. As Alyosha went
				
				out of the house he begged the landlady to look after those who were
				
				left behind, but she interrupted him before he had finished.</p><p id="iii_17-p27">    "To be sure, I'll stay with them, we are Christians, too." The old
				
				woman wept as she said it.</p><p id="iii_17-p28">    They had not far to carry the coffin to the church, not more
				
				than three hundred paces. It was a still, clear day, with a slight
				
				frost. The church bells were still ringing. Snegiryov ran fussing
				
				and distracted after the coffin, in his short old summer overcoat,
				
				with his head bare and his soft, old, wide-brimmed hat in his hand. He
				
				seemed in a state of bewildered anxiety. At one minute he stretched
				
				out his hand to support the head of the coffin and only hindered the
				
				bearers, at another he ran alongside and tried to find a place for
				
				himself there. A flower fell on the snow and he rushed to pick it up
				
				as though everything in the world depended on the loss of that flower.</p><p id="iii_17-p29">    "And the crust of bread, we've forgotten the crust!" he cried
				
				suddenly in dismay. But the boys reminded him at once that he had
				
				taken the crust of bread already and that it was in his pocket. He
				
				instantly pulled it out and was reassured.</p><p id="iii_17-p30">    "Ilusha told me to, Ilusha," he explained at once to Alyosha. "I
				
				was sitting by him one night and he suddenly told me: 'Father, when my
				
				grave is filled up crumble a piece of bread on it so that the sparrows
				
				may fly down; I shall hear and it will cheer me up not to be lying
				
				alone.'"</p><p id="iii_17-p31">    "That's a good thing," said Alyosha, "we must often take some."</p><p id="iii_17-p32">    "Every day, every day!" said the captain quickly, seeming
				
				cheered at the thought.</p><p id="iii_17-p33">    They reached the church at last and set the coffin in the middle
				
				of it. The boys surrounded it and remained reverently standing so, all
				
				through the service. It was an old and rather poor church; many of the
				
				ikons were without settings; but such churches are the best for
				
				praying in. During the mass Snegiryov became somewhat calmer, though
				
				at times he had outbursts of the same unconscious and, as it were,
				
				incoherent anxiety. At one moment he went up to the coffin to set
				
				straight the cover or the wreath, when a candle fell out of the
				
				candlestick he rushed to replace it and was a fearful time fumbling
				
				over it, then he subsided and stood quietly by the coffin with a
				
				look of blank uneasiness and perplexity. After the Epistle he suddenly
				
				whispered to Alyosha, who was standing beside him, that the Epistle
				
				had not been read properly but did not explain what he meant. During
				
				the prayer, "Like the Cherubim," he joined in the singing but did
				
				not go on to the end. Falling on his knees, he pressed his forehead to
				
				the stone floor and lay so for a long while.</p><p id="iii_17-p34">    At last came the funeral service itself and candles were
				
				distributed. The distracted father began fussing about again, but
				
				the touching and impressive funeral prayers moved and roused his soul.</p><p id="iii_17-p35">He seemed suddenly to shrink together and broke into rapid, short
				
				sobs, which he tried at first to smother, but at last he sobbed aloud.</p><p id="iii_17-p36">When they began taking leave of the dead and closing the coffin, he
				
				flung his arms about, as though he would not allow them to cover
				
				Ilusha, and began greedily and persistently kissing his dead boy on
				
				the lips. At last they succeeded in persuading him to come away from
				
				the step, but suddenly he impulsively stretched out his hand and
				
				snatched a few flowers from the coffin. He looked at them and a new
				
				idea seemed to dawn upon him, so that he apparently forgot his grief
				
				for a minute. Gradually he seemed to sink into brooding and did not
				
				resist when the coffin was lifted up and carried to the grave. It
				
				was an expensive one in the churchyard close to the church, Katerina
				
				Ivanovna had paid for it. After the customary rites the
				
				grave-diggers lowered the coffin. Snegiryov with his flowers in his
				
				hands bent down so low over the open grave that the boys caught hold
				
				of his coat in alarm and pulled him back. He did not seem to
				
				understand fully what was happening. When they began filling up the
				
				grave, he suddenly pointed anxiously at the falling earth and began
				
				trying to say something, but no one could make out what he meant,
				
				and he stopped suddenly. Then he was reminded that he must crumble the
				
				bread and he was awfully excited, snatched up the bread and began
				
				pulling it to pieces- and flinging the morsels on the grave.</p><p id="iii_17-p37">    "Come, fly down, birds, fly down, sparrows!" he muttered
				
				anxiously.</p><p id="iii_17-p38">    One of the boys observed that it was awkward for him to crumble
				
				the bread with the flowers in his hands and suggested he should give
				
				them to someone to hold for a time. But he would not do this and
				
				seemed indeed suddenly alarmed for his flowers, as though they
				
				wanted to take them from him altogether. And after looking at the
				
				grave, and as it were, satisfying himself that everything had been
				
				done and the bread had been crumbled, he suddenly, to the surprise
				
				of everyone, turned, quite composedly even, and made his way
				
				homewards. But his steps became more and more hurried, he almost
				
				ran. The boys and Alyosha kept up with him.</p><p id="iii_17-p39">    "The flowers are for mamma, the flowers are for mamma! I was
				
				unkind to mamma," he began exclaiming suddenly.</p><p id="iii_17-p40">    Someone called to him to put on his hat as it was cold. But he
				
				flung the hat in the snow as though he were angry and kept
				
				repeating, "I won't have the hat, I won't have the hat." Smurov picked
				
				it up and carried it after him. All the boys were crying, and Kolya
				
				and the boy who discovered about Troy most of all. Though Smurov, with
				
				the captain's hat in his hand, was crying bitterly too, he managed, as
				
				he ran, to snatch up a piece of red brick that lay on the snow of
				
				the path, to fling it at the flock of sparrows that was flying by.</p><p id="iii_17-p41">He missed them, of course, and went on crying as he ran. Half-way,
				
				Snegiryov suddenly stopped, stood still for half a minute, as though
				
				struck by something, and suddenly turning back to the church, ran
				
				towards the deserted grave. But the boys instantly overtook him and
				
				caught hold of him on all sides. Then he fell helpless on the snow
				
				as though he had been knocked down, and struggling, sobbing, and
				
				wailing, he began crying out, "Ilusha, old man, dear old man!" Alyosha
				
				and Kolya tried to make him get up, soothing and persuading him.</p><p id="iii_17-p42">    "Captain, give over, a brave man must show fortitude," muttered
				
				Kolya.</p><p id="iii_17-p43">    "You'll spoil the flowers," said Alyosha, and mamma is expecting
				
				them, she is sitting crying because you would not give her any before.</p><p id="iii_17-p44">Ilusha's little bed is still there-"</p><p id="iii_17-p45">    "Yes, yes, mamma!" Snegiryov suddenly recollected, "they'll take
				
				away the bed, they'll take it away," he added as though alarmed that
				
				they really would. He jumped up and ran homewards again. But it was
				
				not far off and they all arrived together. Snegiryov opened the door
				
				hurriedly and called to his wife with whom he had so cruelly
				
				quarrelled just before:</p><p id="iii_17-p46">    "Mamma, poor crippled darling, Ilusha has sent you these flowers,"</p><p id="iii_17-p47">he cried, holding out to her a little bunch of flowers that had been
				
				frozen and broken while he was struggling in the snow. But at that
				
				instant he saw in the corner, by the little bed, Ilusha's little
				
				boots, which the landlady had put tidily side by side. Seeing the old,
				
				patched, rusty-looking, stiff boots he flung up his hands and rushed
				
				to them, fell on his knees, snatched up one boot and, pressing his
				
				lips to it, began kissing it greedily, crying, "Ilusha, old man,
				
				dear old man, where are your little feet?"</p><p id="iii_17-p48">    "Where have you taken him away? Where have you taken him?" the
				
				lunatic cried in a heart-rending voice. Nina, too, broke into sobs.</p><p id="iii_17-p49">Kolya ran out of the room, the boys followed him. At last Alyosha
				
				too went out.</p><p id="iii_17-p50">    "Let them weep," he said to Kolya, "it's no use trying to
				
				comfort them just now. Let wait a minute and then go back."</p><p id="iii_17-p51">    "No, it's no use, it's awful," Kolya assented. "Do you know,
				
				Karamazov," he dropped his voice so that no one could hear them, "I
				
				feel dreadfully sad, and if it were only possible to bring him back,
				
				I'd give anything in the world to do it."</p><p id="iii_17-p52">    "Ah, so would I," said Alyosha.</p><p id="iii_17-p53">    "What do you think, Karamazov? Had we better come back here
				
				to-night? He'll be drunk, you know."</p><p id="iii_17-p54">    "Perhaps he will. Let us come together, you and I, that will be
				
				enough, to spend an hour with them, with the mother and Nina. If we
				
				all come together we shall remind them of everything again," Alyosha
				
				suggested.</p><p id="iii_17-p55">    "The landlady is laying the table for them now- there'll be a
				
				funeral dinner or something, the priest is coming; shall we go back to
				
				it, Karamazov?"</p><p id="iii_17-p56">    "Of course," said Alyosha.</p><p id="iii_17-p57">    "It's all so strange, Karamazov, such sorrow and then pancakes
				
				after it, it all seems so unnatural in our religion."</p><p id="iii_17-p58">    "They are going to have salmon, too," the boy who had discovered
				
				about Troy observed in a loud voice.</p><p id="iii_17-p59">    "I beg you most earnestly, Kartashov, not to interrupt again
				
				with your idiotic remarks, especially when one is not talking to you
				
				and doesn't care to know whether you exist or not!" Kolya snapped
				
				out irritably. The boy flushed crimson but did not dare to reply.</p><p id="iii_17-p60">    Meantime they were strolling slowly along the path and suddenly
				
				Smurov exclaimed:</p><p id="iii_17-p61">    "There's Ilusha's stone, under which they wanted to bury him."</p><p id="iii_17-p62">    They all stood still by the big stone. Alyosha looked and the
				
				whole picture of what Snegiryov had described to him that day, how
				
				Ilusha, weeping and hugging his father, had cried, "Father, father,
				
				how he insulted you," rose at once before his imagination. A sudden
				
				impulse seemed to come into his soul. With a serious and earnest
				
				expression he looked from one to another of the bright, pleasant faces
				
				of Ilusha's schoolfellows, and suddenly said to them:</p><p id="iii_17-p63">    "Boys, I should like to say one word to you, here at this place."</p><p id="iii_17-p64">    The boys stood round him and at once bent attentive and
				
				expectant eyes upon him.</p><p id="iii_17-p65">    "Boys, we shall soon part. I shall be for some time with my two
				
				brothers, of whom one is going to Siberia and the other is lying at
				
				death's door. But soon I shall leave this town, perhaps for a long
				
				time, so we shall part. Let us make a compact here, at Ilusha's stone,
				
				that we will never forget Ilusha and one another.</p><p id="iii_17-p66">    And whatever happens to us later in life, if we don't meet for
				
				twenty years afterwards, let us always remember how we buried the poor
				
				boy at whom we once threw stones, do you remember, by the bridge?</p><p id="iii_17-p67">and afterwards we all grew so fond of him. He was a fine boy, a
				
				kindhearted, brave boy, he felt for his father's honour and resented
				
				the cruel insult to him and stood up for him. And so in the first
				
				place, we will remember him, boys, all our lives. And even if we are
				
				occupied with most important things, if we attain to honour or fall
				
				into great misfortune- still let us remember how good it was once
				
				here, when we were all together, united by a good and kind feeling
				
				which made us, for the time we were loving that poor boy, better
				
				perhaps than we are. My little doves let me call you so, for you are
				
				very like them, those pretty blue birds, at this minute as I look at
				
				your good dear faces. My dear children, perhaps you won't understand
				
				what I am saying to you, because I often speak very unintelligibly,
				
				but you'll remember all the same and will agree with my words some
				
				time. You must know that there is nothing higher and stronger and more
				
				wholesome and good for life in the future than some good memory,
				
				especially a memory of childhood, of home. People talk to you a
				
				great deal about your education, but some good, sacred memory,
				
				preserved from childhood, is perhaps the best education. If a man
				
				carries many such memories with him into life, he is safe to the end
				
				of his days, and if one has only one good memory left in one's
				
				heart, even that may sometime be the means of saving us. Perhaps we
				
				may even grow wicked later on, may be unable to refrain from a bad
				
				action, may laugh at men's tears and at those people who say as
				
				Kolya did just now, 'I want to suffer for all men,' and may even
				
				jeer spitefully at such people. But however bad we may become- which
				
				God forbid- yet, when we recall how we buried Ilusha, how we loved him
				
				in his last days, and how we have been talking like friends all
				
				together, at this stone, the cruellest and most mocking of us- if we
				
				do become so will not dare to laugh inwardly at having been kind and
				
				good at this moment! What's more, perhaps, that one memory may keep
				
				him from great evil and he will reflect and say, 'Yes, I was good
				
				and brave and honest then!' Let him laugh to himself, that's no
				
				matter, a man often laughs at what's good and kind. That's only from
				
				thoughtlessness. But I assure you, boys, that as he laughs he will say
				
				at once in his heart, 'No, I do wrong to laugh, for that's not a thing
				
				to laugh at.'</p><p id="iii_17-p68">
				
					"That will be so, I understand you, Karamazov!" cried Kolya,
				
				with flashing eyes.</p><p id="iii_17-p69">    The boys were excited and they, too, wanted to say something,
				
				but they restrained themselves, looking with intentness and emotion at
				
				the speaker.</p><p id="iii_17-p70">    "I say this in case we become bad," Alyosha went on, "but
				
				there's no reason why we should become bad, is there, boys? Let us be,
				
				first and above all, kind, then honest and then let us never forget
				
				each other! I say that again. I give you my word for my part that I'll
				
				never forget one of you. Every face looking at me now I shall remember
				
				even for thirty years. Just now Kolya said to Kartashov that we did
				
				not care to know whether he exists or not. But I cannot forget that
				
				Kartashov exists and that he is not blushing now as he did when he
				
				discovered the founders of Troy, but is looking at me with his
				
				jolly, kind, dear little eyes. Boys, my dear boys, let us all be
				
				generous and brave like Ilusha, clever, brave and generous like
				
				Kolya (though he will be ever so much cleverer when he is grown up),
				
				and let us all be as modest, as clever and sweet as Kartashov. But why
				
				am I talking about those two? You are all dear to me, boys; from
				
				this day forth, I have a place in my heart for you all, and I beg
				
				you to keep a place in your hearts for me! Well, and who has united us
				
				in this kind, good feeling which we shall remember and intend to
				
				remember all our lives? Who, if not Ilusha, the good boy, the dear
				
				boy, precious to us for ever! Let us never forget him. May his
				
				memory live for ever in our hearts from this time forth!"</p><p id="iii_17-p71">    "Yes, yes, for ever, for ever!" the boys cried in their ringing
				
				voices, with softened faces.</p><p id="iii_17-p72">    "Let us remember his face and his clothes and his poor little
				
				boots, his coffin and his unhappy, sinful father, and how boldly he
				
				stood up for him alone against the whole school."</p><p id="iii_17-p73">    "We will remember, we will remember," cried the boys. "He was
				
				brave, he was good!"</p><p id="iii_17-p74">    "Ah, how I loved him!" exclaimed Kolya.</p><p id="iii_17-p75">    "Ah, children, ah, dear friends, don't be afraid of life! How good
				
				life is when one does something good and just!"</p><p id="iii_17-p76">    "Yes, yes," the boys repeated enthusiastically.</p><p id="iii_17-p77">    "Karamazov, we love you!" a voice, probably Kartashov's, cried
				
				impulsively.</p><p id="iii_17-p78">    "We love you, we love you!" they all caught it up. There were
				
				tears in the eyes of many of them.</p><p id="iii_17-p79">    "Hurrah for Karamazov!" Kolya shouted ecstatically.</p><p id="iii_17-p80">    "And may the dead boy's memory live for ever!" Alyosha added again
				
				with feeling.</p><p id="iii_17-p81">    "For ever!" the boys chimed in again.</p><p id="iii_17-p82">    "Karamazov," cried Kolya, "can it be true what's taught us in
				
				religion, that we shall all rise again from the dead and shall live
				
				and see each other again, all, Ilusha too?"</p><p id="iii_17-p83">    "Certainly we shall all rise again, certainly we shall see each
				
				other and shall tell each other with joy and gladness all that has
				
				happened!" Alyosha answered, half laughing, half enthusiastic.</p><p id="iii_17-p84">    "Ah, how splendid it will be!" broke from Kolya.</p><p id="iii_17-p85">    "Well, now we will finish talking and go to his funeral dinner.</p><p id="iii_17-p86">Don't be put out at our eating pancakes- it's a very old custom and
				
				there's something nice in that!" laughed Alyosha. "Well, let us go!
				
				And now we go hand in hand."</p><p id="iii_17-p87">    "And always so, all our lives hand in hand! Hurrah for Karamazov!"</p><p id="iii_17-p88">Kolya cried once more rapturously, and once more the boys took up
				
				his exclamation:</p><p id="iii_17-p89">    "Hurrah for Karamazov!"</p><p id="iii_17-p90">
				
				
				
				</p><p id="iii_17-p91">                               THE END</p><p id="iii_17-p92">
				
				</p>
				
				
				
				</div3>  		
			</div2>
  		</div1>


</ThML.body></ThML>
